Work Text:
i.
Their first date is all honey and promise. It was late after another breathless, edge of your seat match. Roman won but it was close, heart stoppingly close and Bill was wide eyed in disbelief, terror swept away by an overwhelming joy then and he screamed as loud as he could, bouncing on his heels in celebration as the audience roared in wild agreement, the entire building a madhouse of joy as Roman got up, helped his competitor to his feet before they shook hands, nodding to one another in honor. Their night begins there in that dizzying swell of noise and wonder, the air outside sweet with tenderness and Bill is in his usual place, waiting for his usual guest, cigarette newly lit between his fingers, dull orange flame ghostly against the belly of the night.
“That was a close fucking call,” Bill hears someone announce, a grin starting on his lips and there the two of them stand again, alone together in that wanting dark.
ii.
Bill hasn’t been on a date in a long time. Years, he bashfully admits before taking a sip of water, clearing his throat as he ventures a nervous glance at Roman who isn’t bothered by the confession, still looking at Bill with a fondness that makes Bill’s heart sweet with butterflies. This dingy, quiet little diner with its pock marked leather booths and aging retro décor is Roman’s favorite place to eat after a good match Bill learns and the staff here know him well and like him, greeting him by name every time he stops by. “They’re basically family at this point, you know?” Roman says with a smile and Bill nods in understanding, smiling too before reaching over to dip his spoon into a mound of mashed potatoes from Roman’s plate, shoving it into his mouth.
“Damn! Just takin’ what you want then!” Roman laughs out loud then, raising his hands in mock surrender and Bill sticks his tongue out in teasing reply, liking how much he likes himself when Roman is around him. This is romantic, Bill thinks when they finally walk back to Roman’s car, Roman holding the passenger door open for him as he gracefully steps inside. This is romantic, too he thinks as he watches the view from the window, the street lights bleeding into a brilliant, beautiful blur, his chin resting comfortably in his palm.
Roman drives Bill home then, offers to walk with him to the front door and Bill accepts, blushing when he finds himself wanting to hold Roman’s hand. He balls his hands up instead, keeping them to himself. At the door there’s something about the way Roman is looking at him then, like he wants to say something to Bill that he probably shouldn’t, that he isn’t ready to say yet and so he wishes him goodnight and talk to you tomorrow. Bill quietly does the same but waits by his door step to watch Roman get into his car and leave, driving off into the heat of the night and suddenly, deeply, painfully, he misses him.
iii.
The private facebook group for local wrestling is abuzz with conversation lately, more than what Bill is used to. He’s tempted to simply shut off the billions of notifications popping up on his phone, but he notices that most of them seem to be talking about the same thing-- Roman. Now curious Bill decides to investigate. Someone new is hanging around with Roman, commentators say. Bill can feel his stomach drop and he starts to twist and toy at the hem of his sleep shirt, nervous fingers scrolling through the thread. Who cares? one person writes. she’s cute whoever she is. weird outfits though, says another. It’s a guy. it’s a fucking guy, someone else replies and Bill’s eyes widen in panic, his throat running dry and quickly he removes himself from the group and hides his phone under his pillow, taking in a shaky breath as he feels his heart pounding like a drum between his ears. He feels sick, his blood running cold and his stomach turning in horror.
What do they know? They didn’t imply anything. Nobody tried to say that they were dating so why is he reacting like this?
Why is he suddenly so violently disgusted with himself?
He hears his phone vibrate and he nearly vomits, bile burning in his throat as he feels tears sting in his eyes. He knows who the message is from and he doesn’t want to talk to him.
He doesn’t want to talk to Roman ever again.