Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warning:
Category:
Fandom:
Relationship:
Characters:
Additional Tags:
Language:
English
Stats:
Published:
2018-08-16
Words:
802
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
12
Kudos:
70
Bookmarks:
2
Hits:
1,157

Muse

Summary:

Adena finds a way to make Kat her muse.

Set directly after the end of season 2

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

‘Went for a walk. Have to think’ she texts Kat and slips out of the hotel room before Kat can finish getting ready. She walks until her feet hurt, to the Latin quarter of Paris, striding through narrow streets with an agitation she can’t dispel with the hustle and bustle of Paris at night. She ends up outside a familiar building: Coco’s gallery.

 

Why is she here? Coco is the last person she wants to see right now and knowing her ex-girlfriend the chances of her being in here on a Saturday night instead of smoking weed in a basement club in the city centre are next to nothing. She’s not looking for Coco, but she thinks that maybe she’s looking for herself.

 

She walks as if in a dream through the gallery she knows so well, to the room where some of her work is still on display. When she was with Coco, she knew who she was. She was one half of a toxic, destructive relationship, she was screaming arguments in the street and hot, angry sex. The pictures she sees before her reflect this: photos of burning canvases; a vase of roses smashed into shards and ripped into carcases; Coco’s naked body edited to appear monstrous; her own hands coated in red paint. But much as she tried, she couldn’t summon the anger and heat that inspired those photos when she spent hours of the day with Kat.

 

Kat whose smile light up the room, who made jokes during sex, who wanted to stay in and watch a movie on a Saturday night and woke her up with breakfast in bed. Kat who loved her all of the time, and whom she loved with her whole heart. For the first time in her life, Adena was content, and she had no idea how to create art out of it.

 

She sighs, and turns away from the photos, away from the gallery and begins the walk back to the hotel. It was an impossible decision: to give up on her calling and stop making the art that she loved, or to turn away from a chance of happiness and pursue her muse. And the longer she was taking to decide, the more she was hurting Kat. Her girlfriend’s heart-breaking description of herself as an ‘anti-muse’ put an ache in Adena’s chest that was almost unbearable, but it wasn’t fire, wasn’t passion, didn’t inspire her to create.

 

The hotel room door opens when she swipes her key-card, and she’s relieved to find it empty, meaning that Kat must have gone to the party despite their argument. The room is full of Kat, remarkable given that they’ve only been here a few days. The pillows on Kat’s side of the bed are rearranged just as she likes them; tilted slightly to the right so her hair falls over the side when she sleeps. The book she’s reading, an Anthony Horowitz novel, is bookmarked with a used cinema ticket and the cover has a mark from where she put her coffee cup on it. Her shoes are neatly arranged in a line from most formal to most comfy- and she’s arranged Adena’s the same way next to them. Adena knows that her purple, plastic toothbrush will be next to Adena’s electric one in the bathroom, and her brush will be balanced on the rim of the sink; full of her frizzy brown hair. Nothing is broken, nothing is angry, but there’s a beauty to this comfortable, unassuming presence that Adena wishes she knew how to capture in photograph.

 

“Well” she reasons aloud. “The only way to learn is by trying”

 

 

 

When Kat comes back to the hotel that night, it’s to find Adena lying on the floor taking photos of their shoes. Around her is an array of equipment: different coloured lights tried and discarded, soft lilac and yellow petals, lenses and tripods; candles and glitter. She looks up when Kat coughs to make her presence known and beams.

 

“Look at these!” she smiles, accepting Kat’s gentle kiss. Kat is handed the camera and flicks through a collection of photos of… well of her. Of the little things that make up her and Adena’s quiet haven, shot from low angles in warm lighting and soft focus. It was completely Adena’s previous work, yet clearly shot with her masterful skill and with certain familiar touches that made it hers. And it was beautiful.

 

“What do you think?” Adena asks, when Kat eventually looks up from the camera. “They’re not quite perfect yet but I think I’m getting there”

 

Kat cups Adena’s cheek with one warm hand and smiles radiantly. She kisses the tip of Adena’s nose and grins. Her voice can barely contain her excitement when she gives her delighted answer: “I’m a muse!”

Notes:

Feedback is very much appreciated!!!
- Emily