Chapter Text
CHAPTER 1
“She’s your boss, Jane. Your boss. Your superior. The one that signs your checks... metaphorically, of course. Safford signs your checks, but still. Your boss. Your very married, very straight, boss.” She repeated it like a mantra, over and over, hoping the repetition would convince her brain to relay the message to her heart, which was currently beating aggressively in her chest.
Fashion week in Paris was unlike any other. The people, the architecture, the, well, the fashion. All of it so exquisite and beyond any of their wildest dreams. Speaking of wild dreams, Jane reached over the arm of the couch in the middle of the suite she was sharing with Sutton for the duration of the trip and took a few heavy sips of water, hoping to quench her thirst, literally and figuratively. Of course, her ever growing thirst for the blonde in question could hardly be quenched with a glass of water.
The dreams were becoming more frequent, the activities occurring in said dreams becoming more exhilarating. The brunette was unsure how Sutton hadn’t noticed the number of times she’d woken up in a sweat, potentially moaning out the editor’s name. Scratch that. Clearly, the taller girl had noticed, as she ripped the door to the hotel’s bedroom open.
“Jane? Are you ok?” Sutton asked, a very disheveled Richard sitting up in the bed behind her, unsure of whether he should get up or return to his sleep.
“Ugh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you!” Jane apologized and cradled her face in her hands. Sutton waved to Richard to lay back down and closed the door behind her, striding to the couch and sitting beside her friend.
“What’s going on, babe? That’s the third time this week... that I know of, at least. What’s up?” She ran her hand through Jane’s hair and gently rubbed her back.
“It’s nothing, really. Don’t worry about it. Just a dream. I’m really sorry I woke you guys.”
“Tiny Jane. I love you. You really suck at lying, and you talk in your sleep. They’ve very obviously been sex dreams and I’ve caught the name a handful of times.”
Janes already flushed complexion somehow got redder as she turned white as a ghost. “Sutton-“
The redhead lowered her voice. “I’m not judging. Hell, if given the opportunity, I’d try to hit that too.”
“Sutton!” Jane furrowed her eyebrows and buried her face in her hands.
“Jane, Jacqueline is a gorgeous woman. You have nothing to be ashamed of.”
“Sutton, I... I’m... I just... I can’t.” Jane’s voice broke and the tears she swore wouldn’t appear began their sting.
“Whoa, no no no. Tiny Jane! No tears!” The Ginger opened her arms and embraced her friend. “Why are you crying?” She asked gently after a few minutes of absorbing the sobs of her roommate.
“I can’t have a thing for her, Sutton. She’s my boss. She’s married!” Jane’s voice rose as she angrily wiped her tears, then softened again, “she’s married.” She almost whispered.
“I know it’s not my place,” the scruffy voice came from behind them, holding out two mugs of tea. Sutton took them from Richard’s hands, mouthing ‘thank you’ and offering him a small smile. “But for what it’s worth...and I shouldn’t even be telling you this at all, I could literally lose my job, but, the marriage? Not exactly water tight. And Jacqueline? Hardly an arrow.” Richard said as he placed a quick kiss on the top of Sutton’s head and stepped back into the bedroom.
The young women, both of whom had been blowing on the tea to cool it, now sat with their mouths agape, processing this new information.
“Wait, wait, wait, hold on! Richard Hunter, get your ass back here!” Sutton shouted, completely disregarding the clock that read 4:47am. “What does THAT mean?!”
Richard sighed from the doorway. “It means that maybe Jane’s dreams aren’t so unattainable.”
“What do you know, Hunter?” Jane held his gaze.
Richard stepped forward and sat on the arm of the couch. “Look, Jacqueline and I are friends. Good friends. I’ve spoken with her in confidence about a number of personal things, and she’s shared some of her own. Not to sound cliché, but she’s kind of like a sister to me. So, maybe you’re not the only one that struggled while you were gone. And perhaps you’re not the only one that misses the direct eye line from one desk to another.” He took the cup from Sutton’s hand and sipped the tea.
“Damn, that’s some hot tea.” Sutton tried to lighten the mood.
“Did you just?” Jane looked at her incredulously.
“I did.” Sutton smiled smugly and took back her mug.
“Why are you telling me this?” Jane returned her focus to Richard.
“You’re Sutton’s best friend.” He placed a gentle hand on the red head’s shoulder. “Seeing you happy makes Sutton happy, which makes me happy. Besides, Jacqueline deserves to be happy too, and I have a hunch you might just be exactly what she needs.”
Jane gazed down into the mug of dark liquid warming her hands. “I really like her.” she whispered. The two nodded. “We have this great rapport and a mentor/mentee relationship. I’d be devastated if I lost that because I can’t keep it in my pants.”
“Would you rather wake up in a cold sweat every night?” Sutton asked.
Jane took a deep breath, put down her mug, and leaned into the shoulder beside her. Sutton wrapped an arm around the smaller girl and sipped her tea. “We’ll figure this out. I promise... maybe we’ll get you sweaty in a different way.”
“I hate you.”
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Jacqueline Carlyle didn’t run. Not from her problems, not from a challenge, and certainly not in a hotel gym at 6:07am while on a business trip to Paris. However, that’s precisely where she found herself. Running on a remarkably complicated treadmill, while peering down over the city just before dawn. She thought of the board, the future of the magazine, the future of her employees. One employee, in particular. She knew her people were capable. She knew they would land on their feet. She knew no one in that office needed her to hold their hand and guide them through their daily duties. Yet, there was a hand she had held on numerous occasions. A small hand, soft and delicate, perhaps slightly callused at the fingertips, a hand that fit so well in her own. A hand that wrote beautiful, profound, engaging pieces. Pieces Jacqueline was proud to stand behind. Pieces she would risk her position with the company for. She ran faster.
She pressed the red button and felt the belt begin to slow. Her sprint became a jog, then slowed to a walk before coming to a halt. She grabbed the bottle of water from the cupholder and stepped down, wiping the sweat from her brow with the hand towel hanging from the arm of the machine. Catching her breath, she stepped closer to the immense windows and gazed upon dawn as it began to brighten the darkness. The slightest sliver of sun peaking over the horizon, welcoming a new day.
The blonde was pulled from her moment of solitude by the opening of the gym door. “Oh, good morning. I didn’t think anyone would be in here this early,” Hazel eyes failing to meet blue. Seeing Jacqueline flushed, sweaty, her breath labored, her normally perfect hair held back by a sweatband, a few short pieces clinging to her forehead, Jane was suddenly finding it difficult to breathe. She unwittingly walked into a scene straight out of a dream.
“Good morning, Jane.” Jacqueline smiled warmly and noticed the eyes that refused to meet hers. “Seems we shared a common thought. I’m not usually one for a run while on vacation, but I figured I could use a little de-stress as much as the next girl. What are you doing up so early?”
“Oh, I... Umm.. I wanted to be able to give Sutton and Richard some time to sleep in. I didn’t really get a lot of sleep. I was just wandering, more than anything.” The brunette was shocked she got through that statement without any major hiccups.
“I see. Well, I was just finishing up, I was going to go downstairs and grab some breakfast. Would you like to join me?”
Jane was sure Jacqueline noticed how difficult breathing had become, so she shook her head and pinched her leg to get her brainwaves working again. “Yeah, I—yes. Sure. Yes, I would love to.”
Jacqueline smirked as she leaned forward, placing an arm beside Jane’s hip, halfway pinning her to the wall, their faces inches apart. Suddenly the wall behind the brunette began to move. Jacqueline turned the handle all the way and pushed the door open, motioning to the shorter girl. “After you.” Smooth, Carlyle. Very smooth.
Jane took a deep, shaky breath, cleared her throat, and turned into the hallway. Jacqueline knew she was playing with fire. She appreciated the reemergence of the butterflies that had hibernated for so many years before Jane Sloan walked into her life. Something as simple as the brush of a hand, a smile in a meeting, a glance across the bullpen, something so minute could make the butterflies take off like birds on a wire.
The women shared a silent elevator ride down to the lobby before settling into a table at the small café. Two café lattes and two croissants later, they enjoyed simple small talk. “I really do appreciate you posting my article. It means more than you know.”
“It needed to be read, Jane. We’ve spent too long sitting idly by, letting the men upstairs dictate what we can and can’t do. Your article was concise, well written, honest, I was proud to stand behind it. I’m just sorry it took me as long as it did.” Jacqueline reached across the table and placed her hand over the younger woman’s, giving it a brief squeeze before releasing it and taking another sip of her coffee.
“Still. Thank you.” For what felt like the first time in hours, Jane met Jacqueline’s eyes and smiled. She held her gaze for a few seconds before glancing back down and rubbing the kink in her neck.
“So Richard and Sutton, huh? I’m glad they were able to work that out.” Chatting with Jacqueline about her roommate and her boyfriend. This was new. “You know, you mentioned that they’ve sequestered you to the couch. Forgive me for being so forward, but I do have a king size bed, and a pullout couch in my suite. You’re more than welcome to trade one couch for the other, if you’d so choose.”
Jane’s eyes were the size of quarters as she nearly choked on her coffee. “You... I'm... you don’t have to do that. Oh my gosh. That's impossibly generous, Jacqueline, but I would never want to put you in an uncomfortable position or encroach on your space. That’s... Thank you, but it’s... I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“You’re not asking.” Jacqueline took a sip of her latte and held the young woman’s gaze. “Jane, can I be frank with you?” The brunette nodded. “I take care of my people. You know that. I care for every person that walks through the doors of Scarlet. That being said, not every person that walks through those doors has been invited to my home. Very few, in fact. I can count them on one hand. However, I trust you, Jane. I wouldn’t invite just anyone to my hotel room, and I realize that there’s a professional boundry to take into account. I’m simply offering a place to sleep for the next two nights. To actually rest. You have the luxury of not being forced to work while you’re here, and I know you’ve been under some personal stress lately.”
Jane dropped her gaze and sighed. “We don’t deserve you.” she chuckled lightly before her tone turned serious. “I don’t deserve you.”
Ah, that look. The Jacqueline Carlyle classic. It cuts right through you. It’s the spark that starts a five alarm fire deep in the pit of your stomach. A look that warms you and makes you feel safe, while ripping the air from your lungs and leaving you desperate. The warmth of the editor’s hand was the tether that brought her back to the surface. “I won’t stay in the room all the time. I can still hang out with Sutton and Kat and stay out of your way. You can just text me when you’re in for the night and I can run up there and sleep. I can even be out of the room before you’re up if you’d prefer.”
“You’re not exactly a booty call, Jane. You don’t have to make yourself scarce. I think it’d be nice to spend some time together, if you didn’t mind, of course.”
Jacqueline, booty call, spending time together, Jane’s brain felt like a frozen computer, the little wheel spinning away with no progress being made. Jacqueline gave her hand a light squeeze. “I wasn’t lying when I said I missed you, Jane.”
“I missed you too.” The words just fell out.
Jacqueline smiled warmly and released the brunette’s hand. “If you’ll excuse me for a moment, I'll run over to the front desk and pick up an extra key.” Jane watched the taller woman stand and effortlessly glide around the corner towards the front desk. She’d failed to notice the skin tight, black yoga pants and the nearly backless, flowing, black tank top Jacqueline wore over an olive green sports bra. Jane had caught herself admiring the woman’s body on more than one occasion, but today was different. Gym clothes were a whole new ballgame. New curves, new skin, new images to sear into her subconscious. Jane prayed tonight wouldn’t be the night for more dreams. There was a conversation she would rather avoid at all costs.