Chapter Text
There was a single unopened email in your inbox. It had been delivered over an hour ago, but you’d been so busy getting ready for the RFA party that you hadn’t had any time to look at it.
That was what you told yourself anyway. In actuality, you were avoiding it like the plague.
Gripping a mascara wand in a shaky hand, you swiped it through your eyelashes as you leaned close into the mirror and tried very hard not to accidentally jab yourself in the eye. When you were done, you stepped back and gave yourself a long look. You smoothed down the sides of your blue dress, then fixed your hair. You inhaled a deep breath, closed your eyes, and exhaled.
“You can do this,” you said to yourself. You opened your eyes and regarded yourself in the mirror once more. “You can open a damn email. You do it all the time.”
You were the guest coordinator for RFA and a school tutor. Reading emails was about the only thing you did these days. You were just too nervous to read this one.
You breathed in and out again. Everything would be fine. You had to tell yourself so.
Just then, your phone pinged and vibrated, and the sound startled you, sending a new flutter of nerves through your chest. You sighed and walked over to sit in your desk chair and read the RFA chatroom notification on the lock screen. The time was a little after ten o’clock in the morning, which meant you had less than two hours until the party started.
You opened the chatroom in the RFA app and everyone greeted you at once.
Yoosung★: HEY!
ZEN: Good morning, MC
707: Yo MC! We were just talking about you
MC: Hey, guys.
MC wasn’t actually your name, but ever since you had first introduced yourself to the RFA members as “MC” for the sake of your own safety and privacy, they had continued calling you that, even though you’d told them your real name by now. MC became their nickname for you, which you didn’t mind.
Yoosung★: MC, where are you?? You’re the only one not here!
“I’m busy trying not to freak out, Yoosung,” you whispered to yourself, but you didn’t want to say so in the chat and alarm anyone.
MC: Sorry, still at my apartment. I’ll be there soon. I just have to take care of a few things.
707: Take care of things, eh? Sounds suspicious.
MC: Very. I’ll tell you all about it later.
Seven sent his shocked, gasping emoji. In turn, you sent back one of your own emojis: a chibi version of yourself, winking an eye while pressing a coy finger to your lips. It was one of your favorite emojis of yourself, you had to admit.
ZEN: She’s probably just taking a long time getting ready. It’s okay. I did too, but I made sure to wake up extra early this morning to accommodate~
You chuckled and liked his message, which sent a pastel pink heart fluttering across the screen. Even though it had been over a year since Seven gifted you with your own emojis and heart, seeing them among everyone else’s never failed to thrill you. Sometimes you still couldn’t believe you were part of such an amazing group of people.
Your eyes lifted from your phone, and your gaze landed on your laptop screen. Your inbox was entirely clear, save for that one email, and it stared back at you, taunting you. Unease twisted through your stomach.
Fuck it. You had to get it over with. It was an important day, not just for you, but for everyone in RFA, because it was your first fundraising party in two years. You couldn’t attend with this uncertainty looming over you the entire time.
MC: Okay, I’m on my way. See you all soon!
You logged out of the chatroom and put your phone down. Then you leaned closer to the laptop and clicked on the email.
Dear Mirae Chi,
Thank you for your interest in the Global Children’s Alliance and applying for the Elementary Tutor Abroad Program. After extensively reviewing your resume and recent interview performance with our staff, we are proud to offer you a position with our organization. Your assignment, should you accept after completing the necessary requirements, will begin in January of next year.
Upon your acceptance, we will give you more details about your assignment and location. We are currently looking to fill positions at our international schools located in Ecuador, Morocco, Mozambique, and Thailand. If you have any preference on where you would like to be assigned, we would be happy to try and accommodate.
Please respond at your earliest convenience. We look forward to hearing from you, and welcome to the team!
Dowon Chen
GCA-Korea Human Resources Manager
As you read through the email, your hands clamped over your mouth. Was this real? Did you really read that correctly?
The Global Children’s Alliance, the foreign teachers’ program you had dreamed and wished to work at, offered you a job?
“Oh my god!”
A flood of mixed emotions overwhelmed you—relief, nervousness, determination, uncertainty—so much that tears started welling in your eyes. You held them back because you didn’t want your mascara to run, so instead, you smiled, your grin so wide that it made your cheeks hurt. Your pulse raced in excitement, and you knew you had to carry that enthusiasm into the party. You stood, grabbed your things, and headed out the door.
This was what you’d spent the last two years working toward. After the traumatizing events you underwent with Mint Eye, it took a long time for you to feel like you were in control of your own life again, and to discover your path. But with the help of your new friends in RFA, and months of self-reflection and healing, you found it.
This was your path. It had to be.
You couldn’t wait to tell everyone the good news.
* * *
You thought this day would never come, but here you stood at the front hall, welcoming guests to the first RFA party in over two years.
“Mr. Kang!” you said when you saw a man walk through the entrance. You approached him and extended your hand. “I’m so glad you were able to make it. I’m Mirae Chi, the RFA guest coordinator. We’ve been in contact through email.”
“Ah yes,” said Mr. Kang. He shook your hand, then smoothed down his scraggly brown hair. “So you’re Mirae, huh?”
You smiled and nodded. Even though Mirae was your given name, hardly anyone ever called you that, especially your family and closest friends. It wasn’t a unique name by any means, but it felt more like a professional name to you, a name only reserved for those unfamiliar to you.
“Nice to meet you, finally,” Mr. Kang said. “Some of my colleagues should be here shortly.”
You took a quick glance at his attire—brown leather jacket and blue jeans—and you wondered if his colleagues would arrive dressed similarly. He must have skimmed over your memo that the party was a formal occasion, but you wouldn’t dare criticize the president of the Fair Film Festival Committee on his wardrobe. You had a fundraiser to run, and you couldn’t risk offending any potential donators.
“Wonderful!” you said, and you handed him a booklet from the stack in your arms. “This is the speaker list. Now, if you head through these doors”—you pointed to the large double doors behind you—“you’ll be seated at table number thirty-four. When your colleagues arrive, I’ll direct them to you. Please take the time to read through the booklet while you wait. There’s some important information regarding any donations you may consider making. Let me speak on behalf of RFA and say that we’re so grateful you’ve decided to join us today.”
Mr. Kang thanked you with a beaming grin and headed through the doors.
The party was set to start in a little under fifteen minutes, and you were overwhelmed with the amount of guests that had shown up. They walked through the entrance almost consecutively, and you had to call Seven for backup. You stood on either side of the double doors to the banquet hall, greeting guests in turn, handing them booklets, and showing them to their tables.
Never in your wildest dreams had you thought this party would be this successful, especially considering the bad press the last RFA party had received two years ago when Rika nearly coerced everyone to drink her special spiked wine. Fortunately she was arrested and taken away before any harm could be done, but the damage to RFA’s reputation was a huge blow to you and your friends. It took two years of hard work, making new connections and regaining the trust of old ones who would give you the chance. As busy as each member had gotten in dealing with their own personal lives, you still managed to come together on a daily basis in the RFA chatrooms, and somehow you were all finally ready to host a party again.
“Did you really invite all these people?” Seven said when most of the guests had arrived and the bustle in the foyer was finally settling down. He dramatically wiped a nonexistent bead of sweat from his brow.
“Sure did,” you said. “To be honest, I’m surprised so many of them showed up. I was banking on maybe half. People always sound so polite and cordial in email, and they say they’ll come when in reality they actually hate your guts and wouldn’t come if you paid them.”
“I doubt anyone hates your guts, MC. It’s impossible. You’re too sweet. And kind. And smart.”
You rolled your eyes. “Please, you make it sound like I’m perfect.”
“Well, you’re a terrible cook, so you’re definitely not perfect.”
Your mouth fell open, affronted.
Seven laughed. “See, I can’t even tease you without feeling bad about it. You’re just so likeable... But you are bad at cooking.”
He wasn’t exactly wrong about that, you couldn’t even deny it, so you laughed along with him. Laughing was something you and Seven did a lot whenever you were together. He certainly had a different brand of humor than you were used to when you first met him, one that was almost too weird for your taste. But after all you went through during those eleven days, from the chats to those long days in his secret house in the woods hiding from Mint Eye and Rika, you two had developed an unbreakable bond. It wasn’t something you could explain, but you cared very deeply for Seven, almost in a protective way. He cared for you too, and he was always the first to cheer you up and make you laugh after a rough day. After the nerve-racking morning you’d had, it was nice to laugh.
Then you remembered: since arriving at the party, you hadn’t been able to see all your friends together in a group. It had been so busy. You didn’t tell anyone about the email yet.
Seven must have been reading your mind—or he was just spookily perceptive—because he said, “So what was that thing you had to take care of earlier?”
At that, you smiled coyly. “Can’t tell you yet.”
Seven’s eyes widened. “Wait…It’s not…Is it?”
“Maybe.”
“No way! You have to tell me now!”
You pressed a finger to your lips, much like your chibi emoji self.
“Seven! Hey, Seven!” You and Seven both turned to face whoever was calling him from inside the banquet hall. It was Yoosung, waving one hand at Seven, while balancing a tray of champagne glasses in the other. “Help me out, will you!”
You looked at Seven and inclined your head toward Yoosung. “Yoosung’s calling you.”
Seven narrowed his eyes at you. You knew he couldn’t deny helping Yoosung, especially when there were several dozen tables full of people waiting to be served drinks. Jumin would be very upset if he knew the guests weren’t being attended to in time like he’d requested.
“Don’t think I won’t bug you about this later,” said Seven before rushing into the hall after Yoosung.
You laughed again and just shook your head.
Perhaps you were being a bit too evasive about the whole thing, but you really did want to tell them all at once. Then you could thank them together and in person, even though you knew merely thanking them would never make up for all the support everyone in RFA had given you.
When you had confided in them that your experiences dealing with Mint Eye had kept you up at night for months after the ordeal ended, often making you wake in a cold sweat and lose hours of sleep, they suggested a slew of different ways to help you cope. Jumin had done a bunch of research on post-traumatic stress disorder on his own time and offered to refer you to the best therapist in the city. Jaehee took time out of her busy schedule to meet up for coffee at least once a week just to keep you company. Yoosung introduced you to some video games and Seven sent you links to cute and silly MeTube videos, which were a good few hours of escapism for you when you needed it. Zen recommended some dramas and movies for the same reason and was more than happy to discuss with you some of their deeper themes, which helped keep your mind occupied.
They each had helped you in their own ways, and after many grueling months, you finally began to feel like things were normal again. Normal…but in a new way.
This new version of yourself had to move forward. To do that, you needed to figure out what you wanted your future to look like.
You knew what you wanted. You wanted to help people. You wanted to travel. The problem was it seemed like one thing too many.
…But whenever you doubted yourself or your ability to do everything you wanted to do, words someone had told you once always resonated back to you:
“Don’t think about it like you have to do everything at once. Pick one thing first, then see where that takes you.”
So you picked. You quit your dead-end office job and started working at a children’s daycare near your apartment. Even though you’d always liked the idea of helping children, you never thought you could make a career out of it, and so working at the daycare was meant to be only a temporary gig until you found something more substantial. But you ended up loving it so much that you finally felt like you’d found your calling.
Next on your list of things you wanted to accomplish was to travel, and getting a job teaching abroad with the Global Children’s Alliance gave you that opportunity. Though Dowon Chen had offered you a job, you recalled that his email noted that there were still requirements you needed to complete before it was a sure thing. You knew what that meant: you had to complete one more semester as a tutor and pass the GCA’s review of your performance. The new semester would start in two weeks’ time, and since you had spent the entire summer preparing for the RFA party, you had little time to prepare for your class.
But it should be a piece of cake, you thought, now that you had the GCA’s attention, right? Once you set your sights on your goal, once the path rolled out before you as clear as day, there was nothing left but for you to set foot upon it.
See where that takes you.
You couldn’t help but wonder where the person who’d told you that was now. Probably halfway across the world. Perhaps even farther. You hadn’t seen or spoken to him since the day he boarded a plane and flew to places unknown. He made you promise him that you would live every moment for yourself.
And you tried. You tried so very hard.
You hoped, if he could see you now, that he would be proud of you.
As the final guests rolled in through the doors, you let out a contented breath.
After spending a long time feeling like you were drifting, like you were lost and headed nowhere, your life was finally taking shape.
There was nothing, you thought, that you could want more.
* * *
The party began. The champagne was served, the speakers made their speeches, and now all the guests sat at their tables or milled about the hall, discussing donations and acts of charity their organizations could offer.
In the midst of all the hustle and bustle, all six RFA members managed to find a little time to gather together.
“The turnout is amazing!” said Yoosung. His face was slightly flushed from all the running around he’d done to make sure the refreshments were served efficiently, but there was a bright twinkle in his eyes. “I’m so happy we could do this again! I forgot how much I loved these parties.”
“It’s all thanks to MC,” Seven said, and he flashed her a smile.
“Yes, you really have a talent for persuading people,” added Jaehee.
“I am pretty amazing, aren’t I?” you said, dramatically flipping your hair back. Seven and Yoosung laughed. Even Jaehee let out a small giggle, and you couldn’t help but laugh yourself.
Seven stared at you for a long moment, and you realized he was silently, desperately urging you to reveal the news you’d received that morning.
“Um, so…” you started.
But Zen’s voice chimed in before you could get out a word. “Hey, Trust Fund Kid. I meant to ask you before, didn’t V say he was coming?”
Your mouth snapped shut, startled that it wasn’t the first time that person had crossed your mind that day. You turned turned your gaze to Zen, then to Jumin. You hadn’t heard V’s name in…well, you didn’t know how long. Jumin rarely ever talked about him, where V was, what he was currently doing. You weren’t sure if V had even stayed in contact with Jumin these past two years since he’d left Korea.
Jumin shook his head. “No. I believe he considered attending some time ago, but he informed me several weeks back to confirm he couldn’t make it.”
“Where is he?” you said before you could stop yourself.
“The last I heard, he was in Alaska, but he could be anywhere by now.”
Zen let out a low whistle. “Wow, Alaska huh? Good for him.”
“I’m happy for him,” said Jumin. He bowed his gaze to the floor and played with his cufflinks. “But his long disappearances make me more anxious than I’d like to admit.”
You placed a comforting hand on his arm. You’d noticed in the chats that Jumin seemed to be drinking a lot more recently, and you suspected that his estranged best friend had something to do with it, at least in part. “I’m sure he’s fine, Jumin.”
He looked at your hand, then his eyes trailed to your face. He nodded, as if strengthened by your reassurance. “Yes, he must be. Thank you.”
Eventually, the group disbanded. Seven and Yoosung had to check on the refreshments, while Zen left to meet the rabid group of fangirls that were waiting for him at the entrance. Jumin and Jaehee went to greet Jumin’s father who’d finally arrived, fashionably late.
You were left alone.
Your eyes swept across the banquet hall, watching as groups of radically different organizations mingled. You wondered if you should try joining a conversation. Many of them likely had questions regarding RFA, and you were more than willing to answer. However, you couldn’t decide which groups to interject into, as you were still riding the high of hearing back from the GCA. Your mind raced with different possibilities of your future—boarding a plane and jettisoning off to a foreign country, spending your free time discovering new locales and meeting new people. It both excited you and scared you.
You just couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot.
“…I’ve been waiting for this moment,” said a quiet voice behind you.
Thinking a guest had approached you in order to ask some questions, you turned around. “Pardon?”
As you raised your head to see the person’s face, you caught a glimpse of short turquoise hair. The young man’s eyes matched his hair color, and they were soft as they regarded you. He lifted his hand in greeting.
“Congratulations, Mirae,” he said.
Your heart skipped a beat. You hadn’t heard that gentle voice in a long time, but hearing it now felt as familiar as if you’d heard it only yesterday. For a moment, you forgot how to breathe.
“…V!”
His smile widened. “It’s Jihyun Kim now. Long time no see.”
“Jihyun…” you said, trying out the name. You knew that was his real name, of course, but you’d never called him that. You always called him V. Somehow it never occurred to you that he would want to go back to Jihyun, but then again, it had been two years since you’d seen him.
A lot of could change in two years.
“I’m going to have to get used to that,” you said. “I…I can’t believe you’re here.”
“I know, it took me a while.”
Your eyes roamed over his face. His clothes. Taking in the sight of him because you really couldn’t believe that V, no, Jihyun Kim was standing in front of you.
His hair was different than you remembered. The last time you saw him, it almost brushed the base of his neck. Now it was shorter, waves of turquoise swooping casually over his left brow. He wore jeans and a white button down shirt; the top buttons were undone and revealed a white undershirt and a set of three necklaces hanging over his chest. One of them bore a pendant in the shape of a peace sign, while the others were beaded necklaces. You didn’t want to laugh at his unique choice of jewelry, so you bit your lip and grinned instead. He looked rather…free spirited, if you had to think of a term. Almost eccentric. but in a tasteful way, and unrestrained. So unlike the man you knew before.
Most of all, though, he looked happy.
Suddenly realizing you’d been staring at him for too long, you stammered, cheeks growing hot. “How are you?”
“I’m doing well,” he said. He nodded. “Very well, actually. You look different.”
“Oh.” You tucked your hair behind an ear self-consciously. It was shorter than it had been when you met him. You’d styled your hair that way for over a year now, so it was normal to you, but of course, to V, it must be a jarring change.
“It suits you, Mirae,” he said. “I like it.”
“Thank you. You don’t have to call me Mirae, you know,” you pointed out. “Everyone else still calls me MC.”
“I know.”
Now he was staring at you with a certain twinkle in his eyes, as if you were a dream he didn’t want to wake from. You could relate to the feeling: even though he was here, you secretly waited for him to disappear in a blink, a figment of your imagination.
This day was officially too good to be true.
“I’ve missed you.” You didn’t mean to say that out loud, but the words left your mouth nonetheless.
His gaze softened. “I wasn’t planning to be here today, honestly. I had tickets booked for other trips, but now I can make a scrapbook of all those unused tickets.” He let out a laugh. “I took the last flight out just in time to make it here.”
“Really?” you said, surprised. “But why? Jumin was sure you wouldn’t be here.”
“I’ll have to apologize to him for that later. But…plans changed. Something told me I had to come back. That it was time. I couldn’t miss your first successful RFA party, after all.”
“It wasn’t just me. Everyone helped.”
“Oh, of course.” He smiled sheepishly. “I’m proud of all of you. It’s…good to see you, Mirae.”
You couldn’t think of anything to say to him, which was frustrating because you thought you would’ve had a million things to say. In his absence, every now and then he would randomly cross your mind. They were quick, fleeting thoughts provoked by a passing mention by someone in the chatroom or a beautiful sunny summer day. Sometimes, more infrequently as time went on, you’d wake from a nightmare dredging up dark memories of him unconscious on your lap. But whenever you remembered him, you would entertain a daydream of how it would be if you ever got to seem him again. You’d tell him about all the things you’d done, all of your struggles and triumphs, all the things you’d learned.
Now that he was here in front of you, however, you could only gape at him like a fish.
But he was watching you, too.
“Did I ever tell you,” he said, breaking the silence, “that for a long time my hobby was putting together blank white puzzles?”
Your eyes narrowed with interest, a curious smile lifting the corners of your lips. What a weird thing to bring up. “No, you didn’t.”
“I collected them for a long time.”
You tilted your head. “But aren’t you supposed to draw on those first? I thought the purpose of a blank puzzle is to piece together whatever picture you created on them.”
“You’re right, but I never used to do that. I’ve started drawing on them now, though. Or painting. I like mixing different colors together and brushing them across the puzzles. Sometimes I draw simple shapes, or I’ll draw more complex things, if I’m feeling bold. I have so many now that I don’t know what to do with them all.”
Inexplicably, your throat tightened as you listened to him. You’d never seen him like this, his turquoise eyes alight with so much passion. It overwhelmed you.
“You’re painting,” you said. Once, he’d told you that being an artist was his secret dream, his true goal that had been unattainable because he was too afraid of criticism and failure. He’d faced those fears since then, and now he was living his dream.
“I am,” he said. “I’d like to show you some of these puzzles, if you’re interested.”
He had changed. More than you could’ve hoped for him.
“I’d love to see them.”
“Good. I’m glad.”
“I’m happy for you, V—I mean…Jihyun. I know how much learning how to draw meant to you.”
“I’m doing all the things I said I’d do.” He paused, as if weighing his next words. “Do you remember what else I told you I wanted to be able to do someday?”
You thought back two years, filtering through everything you’d ever said to one another. There were so many things you talked about, sharing your dreams and hopes of the future as you both took time to heal after those traumatic eleven days with Mint Eye. He could have referred to any one of those dreams, but, for the life of you, you couldn’t guess which one. You were just so overjoyed to see him and to know that he was okay. No, he was more than okay. He was radiant.
You never found out the answer to his question because the sound of someone else’s stunned voice interrupted your conversation.
“…V?”