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michael's thighs and stomach are aching and stinging. he knows it hurts, but he keeps slicing his skin anyway.
michael thought he was the ugliest thing on the planet. he thought his thighs were too big and his stomach was too flabby. he hated his body and the way he looked. that's why he wears his hoodie and sweatpants all the time, to hide his insecurities.
he also did it because he knew he wasn't good for anyone. everyone was far more better than him, and even when they hung out with him, he was always left out. he felt unwanted.
just like during halloween last year. jeremy called him a loser and left him there, making him feel unworthy. he hurt himself more than he should've that night.
michael knows that it was the squip that did that to him, not jeremy. but he wonders if jeremy feels that way at all, even without the supercomputer demon.
michael starts sobbing, his tears falling and stinging the top and insides of his thighs.
suddenly, he gets a text from jeremy, saying that he was going to be there in less than five minutes.
shit.
michael suddenly wipes his tears and quickly puts on his sweatpants and his hoodie. he dashes and sits down in his worn out red beanbag, taking his cell phone out.
he's scrolling through his phone when he sees jeremy head down the stairs into the basement, greeting michael with a warm smile.
"ready to play?" jeremy asks excitedly. "i brought snacks."
michael smiles and nods his head, getting the game ready for them to play.
twenty minutes go by, and the game over sign flashes brightly on the tv screen. jeremy sets down his remote and looks at michael, feeling concerned.
"are you okay man? you just died for the twentieth time in the past ten minutes. totally unlike you." jeremy says.
"yeah i'm fine! just a little spaced out i guess." michael replies.
jeremy doesn't look so sure, but he shrugs it off. "i'm going to go to use the bathroom. i'll be back." jeremy heads up the stairs.
michael nods and waits till jeremy is fully up the stairs. now is a chance for michael to look at his cuts. they were hurting and stinging, from being hunched over a beanbag and rubbing against eachother. he looks down at his stomach and traces his finger over the old, and new lines.
a few minutes pass and michael hears jeremy's footsteps coming down the stairs. he quickly pulls his hoodie down.
"hey i brought water, i was getting thirsty. here, catch." jeremy tosses michael a bottle. the bottle completely misses his hands and hits his stomach, making michael yelp.
michael clings onto his stomach, wincing in pain. jeremy didn't know what he just did, but he felt guilty and scared.
without thinking, michael lifts up his hoodie, revealing his scars. he pats them gently, helping the stinging sensation go away.
jeremy saw the red and pink stripes on michael's stomach, his eyes filling up with tears.
"michael?" jeremy says softly. michael looks up at him with regret, tears already falling down his tan cheeks.
jeremy quietly goes and sits down on his knees in front of the filipino boy.
"why... why, michael?"
michael stays silent for a bit, hesitating to say a word. all falls silent until his lips open, saying three words.
"i'm ugly, jeremy."
jeremy's heart sinks. tears fall down his pale cheeks, and he starts to feel a pain of guilt in his chest.
"michael... no you're no-" jeremy's words were cut off by michael, his facial expession all of a sudden angry.
"don't you say i'm not ugly jeremy, because i know i am. my thighs are huge, my stomach is a flop. i'm nothing but a burden to your reputation. i don't know why you even still hang out with me." michael's face is red, and he is on the verge of crying.
jeremy's heart breaks. he loves michael, and he wants michael to know how beautiful he is.
without thinking, jeremy slowly puts his hand on michael's chest, and pushes him back on the beanbag, making him lay flat. michael is confused, but doesn't say a word.
he slowly pulls michael's sweatpants down, looking for any hesitation in his body language.
"is this okay?"
michael nods his head, and jeremy continues to pull down the pants to his knees.
he gets low, and places both hands on either sides of michael. his eyes wandering all over michael's body in an adoring matter.
he sees the pink and red scars on the filipino's thighs, making his heart break. jeremy hesitates, but then carefully places a soft kiss on the inside of the boy's thigh, letting go and taking a deep breath. he kisses it again, but now slowly going up the boy's legs.
michael looks down at jeremy, shocked at what just happened. he stays still not knowing what to do.
jeremy glances back up at michael, then veers his attention back down to the filipinos soft and squishy thighs. "i love everything about you." jeremy says softly, planting another kiss on michael's soft thighs.
"i love your smile, your laugh." he says, kissing further and further up his legs. michael takes a shortened breath and murmurs for jeremy to keep going. jeremy obliges, and says more things he loves about michael, taking short pauses in-between each phrase to kiss him.
"i love the way you smell, like cinnamon." kiss. "the way you hug me when i'm scared." kiss. "your fluffy, soft hair." kiss.
jeremy keeps doing this, now at michael's hips. he lifts michael's hoodie up and brings his head under, continuing his process, starting at his stomach.
"i love how soft you are, i love your thighs." jeremy kisses michael's stomach multiple times, leaving michael all flustered and red.
"j-jeremy, i-i uh, ahh!" michael moans, suddenly feeling jeremy suck on his chest, leaving hickeys. jeremy is doing such a good job, michael can hardly pay attention to all the wonderful things he's saying, he's only focused on jeremy's mouth & lips and where they touch.
once jeremy reaches the top of michael's chest, he pops his head out from under the hoodie, now getting fully on-top of michael. jeremy bites and sucks at michael's neck, leaving love marks all over. he bites his earlobe and licks his ear.
"i love you, micah." jeremy whispers.
jeremy plants his last kiss on michael's lips, cupping his hands on the boy's cheek. he kissed him more passionately than he did on his thighs, and michael was melting into jeremy's lips and touch.
jeremy pulls away, leaving michael wanting more.
"jer, th-that was..." michael says, struggling to find his words. jeremy places a finger to his lips.
"i know, micah. just promise me you won't do it again."
michael nods his head and smiles.
jeremy eyes him with uncertainty.
"i-i promise."
"please don't micah, that scares me."
michael nods his head okay and places a hand on jeremy's cheek.
"thank you, jeremy. i love you."
jeremy smiles and kisses michael once again. "i love you too michael. i love you more than you can ever imagine."
the boys press their lips together, tasting each others sweet taste of caramel and candy.
michael knows how beautiful he is now.