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Language:
English
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Published:
2004-01-05
Words:
352
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
2
Kudos:
26
Hits:
604

Statistically Probable

Summary:

A large majority of people, meeting Jeff for the first time, assume he's gay.

Notes:

Just some comment-fic I wrote manymanymany years ago.

Work Text:

A large majority of people, meeting Jeff for the first time, assume he's gay.

But he's not, really he isn't. He likes girls far too much to ever be gay. He likes breasts and legs and bottoms and lesbians and thighs and gussets -- though he's not one hundred percent sure what that one means but it sounds enough like a girl-part for him to like it. One of these day he'll look it up. Anyway, he likes girl-parts far, far too much to be gay.

He once read an article about how women are more likely to change sexualities over time than men, which provided him with some great fantasy material about the blonde and the red-head in the tech department. The thing about men -- how they usually know their sexuality from an early age and rarely "jump the fence" -- he just nodded over and filed away in the part of brain set aside for useless knowledge, to be pulled forth at an opportune moment.

The moment doesn't come when expected, over a random drink in the pub with friends. Instead, that piece of knowledge hurtles itself to the front of his brain at the exact moment that Steve, plastered out of his mind, leaps up from his log by the campfire, declares himself "too sexy for s'mores" and stumbles towards the river, leaving a trail of clothing behind him. By the time Steve is standing thigh-deep in the water, splashing himself, and shrieking like a thirteen year old girl about the temperature, that piece of information -- which seems to have taken on the appearance of his university maths professor, Dr. Griffiths -- is jumping up and down yelling something about "not being statistically probable."

Not that he's paying any more attention to it than he ever paid in class. Wet, naked Steve is by far the more interesting sight. Wet, naked, floundering-towards-him-pleading-for-a-towel-or-a-blanket-or-for-god's-sake-some-body-heat-from-somebody Steve.

So, maybe he is a little bit gay. It's another thought to file away and think about later. After he's wrapped Steve in a blanket and taken him back to their tent to get him warmed up, that is.