Chapter Text
The library was filled with light as much as it was with dust and ancient books. One of the walls was nothing but blue and clear windows, and beyond, endless sea.
Arroyo shifted at my back, folding his legs so that they could better prop up the thick atlas he was reading. I was leaning against him, back to back with my own novel. My light blue skirts pooled around me as I flicked another page in the book.
“Ready for tomorrow?” I ask, turning to look at him over my shoulder. His lips part a bit as his eyes flicker over the page. I watch as his eyebrows slowly gather in the center of his forehead. It seems he’s come across something particularly interesting. My heart stutters at that. His thinking face was a favorite of mine. So much concentration and contemplation.
“Is it too late to back out?” He murmurs back and turns the page.
No, I want to say, it’s not too late. You don’t have to do this. I bite back the words and offer a measly “Haha, don’t worry Ar. You’ll be fine,”
He straightens himself and turns to face me, an agitated glare simmering in his eyes. Damn, was I that unconvincing? Couldn’t I manage to be at least a little bit believable?
Apparently not, since my heart wasn’t in it. In all honesty, there was nothing I wanted more than for him to just cancel the rite altogether.
For his sake and mine.
“It’s going to be horrible,” he sighs and tosses away the atlas. The poor thing slides across the floor and into a table leg with a dejected thump. “I hate parties,” he grinds out and folds his arms.
“You’re acting like a spoiled toddler,” I tisk and flick him on the shoulder.
“Ow hey!” He halfheartedly swats my hand away, looking despondent. “I am not! I’m just nervous. And a little jealous if I'm being honest,” he continued “You’ll have tons of fun. You’re an amazing dancer. I, on the other hand, have hands for feet,”
“You’ll have fun to Ar. Just don’t overthink it.” I hum in the most reassuring voice I can manage. Arroyo has known this day was coming for 20 years now. The Choosing festival, a rite of passage that comes only when the Lordling of Summer turns 20. The ideal age for the lordling to begin his official duties as a soon to be high lord of summer. So instead of lordling lessons and sitting in on meetings, its diplomatic missions, and running meetings. In addition, he will oversee the runnings of the court like budgets and abroad relations too. Though I hate to see him in so much distress over the situation, I’m excited for him. No one is a better fit to succeed High Lord Tarquin then Arroyo.
“I hate parties, can’t dance and will be the center of attention,” he deadpanned, shoulders slumping in resignation. I wrap my arm around his shoulder and give him a reassuring pat. “Am I missing anything?”
“That you’ll be picking a wife?” I add. The words taste bitter as they leave my mouth. I don't know what aggravates me more. The fact that he’s picking a wife tomorrow and I know it won't be me, or the fact that even though I know this information, my heart still twists at the thought of him marrying someone else. But at the end of the day, I just want him to make the right choice for himself. I want him to be with someone he can trust and rely on and love.
The sigh he releases must come from the deepest bowels of his soul since he seems to deflate completely at the thought. “ Yes,” he says “There’s that.”
“You know who you're going to pick right?” Though the words leave an ache in my chest, I manage to push them out past my teeth and lips.
“Yea,” He starts slowly, a small smile blooming on his lips like a new dawn. “I think I do,”
I couldn't help the small tug upwards on my own lips at the sight. That secret smile has been flashing across his face since the day he met the female he’s undoubtedly thinking about. Lori, a nobleman's daughter from Meridian, another city in the court. She came a few years ago when I was 14 and Arroyo was 16, on the grounds of studying with Arroyo and his tutors. As soon as she showed up at the first dinner he was captivated by her sugar sweet smile and long lashes, but his shyness held him back and gave off the image of being aloof.
Thus, the next few years of our friendship was spent with him fawning over Lori and giving me a full detailed explanation of their romantic encounters. I, on the other hand, was trying not to think too deeply into where Arroyo would sneak off to in the middle of the night and trying to ignore the strong scent of Lori that would cling to his skin in the morning.
For the first few weeks of her being here, I was simply jealous of the attention he was giving her, but that quickly shifted into something else altogether. It had to have been the second week of her living in the palace when she approached me in the library.
I had been sitting in a corner, curled up with a book and a glass of iced tea when I heard light footfalls approach me. When I looked up Lori towered over me. An ugly sneer replaced her usual grin as she looked down her nose at me as if I was a bug she couldn't wait to crush.
“Cass isn't it” her haughty voice is tight as she asks the obvious question
“Yea… we’ve been hanging out all week-”
“Anyway, I need to ask you to do something for me,” she interrupted with a dismissive wave of her hand.
“Yea-uh… sure, what do you need-”
“I need you to stay away from Arroyo,” she hissed. Her eyes flashed with so much fury it stunned me for a moment.
“Ex-excuse me?” I stammer. Lori had been pleasant enough to be around all week! All smiles and good-tempered jokes. What brought this on?
“You heard me! I said stay away from him,”
“No! What gives you the right to ask that of me. I don't take orders from you,”
“Listen to me and listen to me closely Cassiopeia,” she spits out my name as if it burns her tongue “ You may be a lordling in the night court, but here you're nothing but a miserable, pathetic, wrench. Know your place and stay there,” she sneers and glares daggers at me. I recoil for a moment at the insult before straightening my shoulders, slamming my book shut and standing up.
I bear my teeth at her as is his “I’m not one to be submissive to someone as spoiled as yourself. Especially over a few sharp words,”
Lori pauses for a moment, doubt starting to cloud her hazel eyes. But after a blink, it clears and her fury comes back at full force as she snarls. “Fine, there are other ways of getting rid of you,” she turns and starts strutting towards the door. I try to bite back the words as they fight to get out, but eventually, my fear-filled curiosity wins over.
“What do you mea-,”
“I know you’re in love with Arroyo, can't have that now can we,”
I stiffen at that. If there was anything my mother and family taught me, it was never let someone control you. Never let someone take advantage and walk all over you. My immediate reaction had been to shout and to beg for her not to tell anyone. But it passes. I train my expression into a look of cool indifference.
“Are you sure your information is correct?” I say evenly, careful not to show any tells. Things like these were like playing cards. Showing your hand guarantees you lose the game.
Her eyes flicker around my face for a moment. Be still, I swear I hear my Aunt Nesta hiss in my head. I relax my hands at my side, but too late. Lori’s eyes land on my clenched fist before flickering back up to my face. A fang filled smile spreads across her face as she meets my gaze again.
“Oh yes, quite certain,” is all she says before turning around and gliding out of the room, skirts sweeping behind her.
I instantly release a sigh of relief. Her presence is a suffocating as a tarp on a fire. My moment of relief quickly passes though. Fire spreads across my neck and back as a wave of anxiety washes over me. Aunt Nesta would be disappointed in how that conversation ended. I take a deep breath. No matter. I gather up my books from the ground and make my way to the front of the library. Best to find Arroyo now before all hell breaks loose.
As luck would have it that day, Arroyo had gone away to meet with a few guildsmen in the city with High Lord Tarquin and wouldn't be back until dinner. We were halfway through the meal. High Lady Opal was telling us a story about her exploring an underwater cave when she was around our age. As Lori flipped between politely laughing at the most opportune time and glaring daggers at me from across the table, Arroyo and his father strode into the room. Ar took the seat at my left. I swear Lori could have had steam coming from her ears. It was quite an enjoyable sight. But my amusement was short-lived because as soon as dinner was over, Lori laced her fingers through Arroyo’s and pulled him into the hallway.
I followed them into the fall, the picture of grace and leisure. A beautifully crafted mask to hide the anxiety rising in me. Lori took a step closer to Ar, placing A delicate hand on his chest and rising up on her toes to whisper something in his ear. Though she didn't really try to whisper. Fea all the way in the Night Court could hear each word as she whispered.
“I have something to tell you, it's about Cassiopeia,” An eyebrow ticked higher on his forehead as his eyes swept over to meet mine.
Why are you glaring at Lori?
I jumped at the suddenness of my brothers' voice in my head. I hadn't even realized he had come to stand next to me.
She’s going to tell Arroyo I have feelings for him
Are you going to stop her?
I don’t know if my pride will let me.
So you’d be ok if she tells him?
...No, I’m not ready yet.
Then I’d put my pride aside and stop her.
You want me to let her manipulate me?
I want you to wait, play your cards right, and strike at a better time. That time is not tonight though.
I huffed and moved away from him towards Lori and Arroyo. He has a point. Strike when the time is optimum. For now, lie in wait.
I’ll play your game Lori, but not forever.
“A word, Lori,” I hummed, not daring to look at Arroyo.
“Of Course Cass,” she beamed a sharp smile at me.
She followed me down the hall and into a small study. As soon as the door clicked shut I turned to face her, steeling myself for her poisoned words.
“I’m not going to stay away from Arroyo-”
She interrupted me with a click of her tongue “Ah ah. Stay out of my way if you want your pathetic secret to stay hidden.” I grind my teeth, not bothering to hide my anger now.
“Now nod if you understand,”
Lie in wait
I just a short, curt nod, suppressing a snarl all the while.
“That’s a good girl,” she hissed. And with that, she turned and strode out the room. Like a warlord who knew he’d won the battle.
I shook my head at the memory. That was a long time ago. For a while after that, I was just seething with rage every time I saw Lori with Ar, but as time went on I found I couldn't bring myself to care about Lori and her pettiness. It wasn't worth wasting time thinking about.
Arroyo stood and pulled me to my feet.
“Come on,” he said “Let's not stay in the library all day,”
“I don't mind the library,”
All he did was laugh as he started moving towards the door, pulling me along with him. Maids darted in and out of various rooms as we passed by. Their white skirts moving the sand around on the floor as they went. The palace was always full of sand, no matter home much anyone sweeps.
Ar broke out into a run as we neared the front hall. Rooms painted vibrant shades of blues and corals speed by as I let my feet carry me away with Arroyo. He nimble sidestepped a butler with a large stack of dinner plates as I bounded over a maid scrubbing the floors on her knees with a brush. I only realized he skidded to a stop when I ran into his back.
“Arroyo where are we going?” I huffed as he turned left down another hall and started back up at full speed. How can he keep up this pace!?
“The docks!” he shouted over his shoulder. I should have known. When we reached the end of the hall he pushed open a set of glass doors and waited for me to dart out under his arm. For a moment, I just breathed the sea air deep into my lungs. The doors lead to a stone patio. The sound of the waves crashing on the rocky shore was almost deafening. Here the docks were merely down the hill. I turned to look back at Ar but realized he was already halfway down the hill. Calderon that boy was fast!
I took off after him, careful not to trip over the rocks or slip on loose sand. The sun glimmering off the water was a blinding sight. When I reached him he was talking to the head Shipman on the dock.
“Now Arroyo, High Lord Tarquin said he didn't want you out on the water today. You have a lot to do apparently. Oh hello, Cass! I didn't know you were here,” Marley crooned in his weathered, deep voice.
I beamed and offered a small wave as Arroyo said “It will only be for an hour, Marley. I’m restless. The sea is calling me!”
“I don't think-”
“He was just in a meeting with one of Tarquin's advisors about the festival. I can assure you he's on task Marley. He just needs to clear his head a bit,” I interrupt, hoping my little speech sounds a refined and reassuring as it did in my head. Marly studies the two of us for a moment before giving a single nod and stepping aside.
“One hour. That it. Any longer and I’ll call your father myself,”
“Yes sir, thank you, sir,” I hum and sweep into a curtsy even though it is not needed. I tugged on Arroyo's sleeve hard enough to pull him into a slight bow too.
Marley beamed with pride at the gesture and continued past us, off to give another set of teens a hard time.
“You really must work on your people skills Ar,”
“Why do that when I have you to get me out of trouble?”
My cheeks warm at that, but I lease a sigh and follow him towards his boat. It's a modest little ship. All golds, whites, and blues. You wouldn't know it’s the ship of a lordling unless you saw him tending to it as he does. The SeaStar, the side of the ship read, affectionately named after me. He was up the gangplank in one bound and at the ropes holding the boat to the dock in another. I went over and untied the other side of the boat while Ar loosed the sail. He paced around the ship, tinkering with a few other things that I didn't know enough about to help with myself. Instead, I went below deck and got his case of maps. Every map made of the summer court was in that case. If you were looking for a specific one, an ancient one, or even a magic one, Arroyo probably had it.
I put them on the bench next to the wheel and take a seat. Ar bounds up the stairs and grabs onto the wheel. In no time we are pulling out of the docks and into open water.
“Where are we going today and did we replenish the snack barrel?” I ask as I start leafing through the maps.
“Just a little trip around the city to the crescent bay. And yes, the barrel is full,” I grin and hop over the railing onto the lower deck. In two-step I get to the large barrel we use to disguise snacks on the ship. The lid pops off with a cloud of dust. I reach in and snatch two bags of seaweed chips.
When I finally get back to the wheel I plop back down on the bench, swing my feet up onto the railing, and toss the second bag of chips at Arroyo. He catches the bag with one hand in one movement and tears open the seal with his teeth in another.
“Orion is going to be mad we left him,” I hum as I toss a chip into my mouth.
“He was the one who didn't want to go to the library with us in the first place,” He tisks as he turns the wheel to the port side. “And feet off the rail, you know I just restained the wood”
I huff but remove my legs. The water is a beautiful deep blue, foaming white as The boat cuts through the wave. Colorful fish dart in and out of the coral sunk beyond the surface of the water. There was nothing like this in the night court. Though we did border the ocean, the waves were nothing more than inky black. It was too cold or any fish any color other than grey, black, and dark green, to dwell in the waves. It was nice to see some new wildlife.
I let out a lazy yawn and stretch out on the bench as Arroyo begins whistling a sea jaunty tune.
“You’re like a lazy cat,” Ar throws a smirk over his shoulder at me. I roll my eyes and continue to stretch
“Cats live the best lives. I wish I were one. No meeting or deadlines or-,”
“Balls or parties or fancy dinners,” Arroyo interrupted with a grumble.
“Arroyo for the last time you will be fine.” I sit up and use the voice my Mother gives my Father when he suggest a stupid idea he and Uncle Cassian thought up. “You only have to dance once and I know you know the steps. I didn't spend hours practicing with you for nothing! You do well at the dinners. There is literally nothing to worry about!” Arroyo merely grumbles and turns back to the wheel.
I’m just getting comfortable when another voice assaults my eardrums.
Where are you? Orion asks through our bond.
On a boat
Are you with Ar?
Of course.
Ooooooooooo
Stop. I hiss back
You’re running out of time Cass. You need to tell him the truth.
“No!”
“No what! What's wrong!” Arroyo spins around on his heels, suddenly alert.
“Oh uh… nothing. Just talking to Orion” I stammer and crinkle the empty chip bag in my hand.
I-I mean not yet. I can’t.
It’s now or never Cass…
I know…
Silence follows and I feel the end of the bond grow cold. He's drawn up his mental shield. I know it’s now or never. I know that in two days time Ar will be engaged to Lori. I know if I don’t tell him how I feel I’ll always be saddled with what could have been. This argument is all I've been thinking about since ar turned 20. But how can I tell him? We've been friends so long. I- it would be weird for me to suddenly confess my love. All of our shared memories, moments, would be spoiled. I pull my arm over my eyes and heave a sigh. I can't risk it. I can't risk losing him.
So you can risk losing him to Lori though?
I snap up my mental shields as the intruding voice of Orion rings through my head. Damn him. Damn me and my letting my mental guard drop.
“We're here,” I jump at the sound of Ar’s voice. I wander over to the railing and watch as he pulls on the rope connected to the anchor. It plunges into the water, making fish swim away from it.
The sight of the city from the ship is magnificent. The crescent bay forms a perfect half circle, and beyond, the city spirals out, towering higher and higher until it reaches the sandstone castle at the top. Kayaks and canoes dip and weave through the shallows, their woven traps full of fish. Children splash around near the shoreline.
“Ready for a little swim?” Ar calls up to me before tugging his shirt off. I bit my lip, hard. Cauldron, he doesn't even know how much power he has over me. Somehow though, I manage to keep my face neutral.
“Ar it wouldn't be wise” but my reprimand is too late. He dives into the cerulean water like a dolphin. The water parts for him as we resurfaces. He runs his fingers through his curly white hair.
“Come on Cass, you know it's dangerous to swim alone. By not getting in your putting me at risk”
“Please! You swim so well I'm pretty sure you're part shark”
“I know you're hot. You're sweating buckets.” he quips as he starts doing backstrokes in a loose circle. I bead of sweat trails down my back, sending shivers up my spine.
“No Ar” I roll my eyes at him.
“I didn't want to have to do this Cass, but you leave me no choice,”
I open my mouth to ask him what he's going on about just as he raises his arms and sends a spray of water at me. I'm drenched in an instant.
“You're dead” I give him a wicked smile as I shuck off my wet clothes and do a cannonball into the water.
The rest of the day is spent in a splashing war. My pitiful water powers only help me so much, and at one part Ar tosses me into the air with a massive wave. I’ll get back at him later I vow.
But for now, I just want to live in this moment. This perfect bliss right before everything will come crashing down.