Chapter Text
You Belong With Me.
AKA The Valentine's Day Dance.
Thursday afternoon.
Me and Lexa have been friends practically since the day she moved to Polis over a year ago and depending on who you ask; I've been in love with her for almost as long. Not that I've had the guts to tell her or anything. Don't get me wrong - I'm no coward, but it's still kinda nerve-racking asking your best friend out on a date.
What it is?
Fine! Maybe I've been a bit of a wimp these last few weeks, but timid is not usually a word that I'd associate with myself, nor would others and especially not Lexa.
Just put yourself in my place for a minute. Okay, now imagine someone that your crazy about. Someone you could see yourself with for the long haul. I mean past prom. Past graduation and even past college. Yeah, I'm talking about a serious relationship here. The only thing is you haven't told them that part yet. You really wanna, but you wonder how they will react when you do.
So, you feel those nerves yet?
Good. Take that nervousness you're feeling and double it. Triple it by a million and yeah... you'll understand how I feel. I know I sound a little dramatic right now, but Lexa... and I'm not kidding here.. she is the most popular girl in our whole entire school.
Why I hear you ask. Now that is an easy question.
Lexa is kind, caring, compassionate, always thinking of others and she's really a great student. Not that the other kids really care about that. They adore her because she's the star of our football team. Well, she's the Team Captain and a superb one at that - taking Arkadia to new heights and if you know anything about our high school; which I'm guessing you don't. Anyone even remotely related to the team is immediately elevated in social standings and my Lexa... She's the touchdown queen with her own fan club. Literally! The cheerleaders virtually follow her around everywhere. They swoon and giggle, even the straight ones (the boys too). And no one is more besotted than head cheerleader: Costia Cole.
That girl hangs on Lexa's every word. I really believe if Lex asked her to jump, she'd really ask how high?
Not that I'm jealous or anything... What!? I'm not! Just because Costia is twig thin and has these big brown twinkling eyes. Thick blonde hair that seems to naturally bounce when she walks, kinda like how Supergirl's does. No I'm... Okay, maybe I do sound a little envious, but that's only because Lexa is destined to be mine.
Wow! Now I sound like some love-struck teen fawning over their crush. . . Yep, that's exactly what I am so who am I kidding?
But I don't care, because in the words of Taylor Swift: You Belong With Me, Lexa.
On a side note, that music video is totally our story. Lexa even lives next door to me, although we don't do the whole writing notes thing, because hello we text. We do tell each other almost everything though and Lexa even knows about my secret crush on Miley Cyrus... What!? I just really liked her in the Malibu video, besides I know all about Lexa crushin' on Little Mix's very own - Perrie Edwards... and if I happened to purchase a similar dress that Perrie may have been wearing in a fashion magazine then hey! That girl has got style is all.
Anyway... So here I am. Sixteen and pretending to be all grown up now - yeah, right - and I can't even tell my best friend how I feel. That said best friend who is walking over to me as we speak. Who happens to be wearing cute white shorts, that show off nearly all of her tanned - go on forever - legs. Matched with a tight black tee, her light blue denim jacket thrown back over her shoulder.
Jeez, she looks like some otherworld goddess here. Crap! Oh crap! Play it cool, Clarke. Play it waaaay cool.
"Hey," my throat decides now is the time to sound like I swallowed glass. Great. "Lex. Hey." You've already said hey, dummy.
Go on laugh it up, guys. I'm only failing here.
"Hey. I stopped by your house this morning but your mom said that you'd left already." Lexa sat down beside me, as we looked out over the school field. Let me tell you that she smelt amazing. Body wash mixed with like fine old leather and fresh rain. She's like killing me here, but wait she's still talking.
"Something about art supplies?" She adds, suddenly avoiding my gaze which was weird.
We always walk to school together - much to the annoyance of her fan club - but it makes sense since we both live next door and are heading to the same place. In my hurry this morning I forgot to tell her about my last minute plans, but I really needed stuff for my art class. Double crap. I hope I didn't make her late this morning.
"Yeah, I had to buy a couple new watercolor brushes, for that big art project that's coming up."
She nods, her gorgeous green eyes still focused on the ground. "I would have gone with you, you know, but Costia told me that Finn tagged along instead."
Did she now! That little... Of course she would tell Lexa that, even though it wasn't true. I went to the art store alone and Finn was already there supposedly buying his own stuff.
Okay, so maybe that wasn't fair. He really was buying some paints. This year he decided to switch classes and take up art figuring 'it would be fun ' - his words. The thing is... he's like really bad. Awful. I wouldn't usually criticize somebody's capabilities, but Finn has admitted himself that he sucks. Although, he is willing to learn which does count for something, and when he's really struggling he asks for my help. I've tried to show him some basic techniques and how to mix colours, and how art is an expression of what you're feeling. . . Sigh.
Let me put it this way, I'm no miracle worker were his work is concerned (sorry Finn).
Yep, before you ask. He does have a crush on me, but there is no way I'm going there again. Me and Finn kissed January of last year when I thought he was all goofy and cute, but little did I know he already had a girlfriend: Raven. Long story short, she forgave us both eventually (after she dumped his sorry ass of course) and now she's one of my good, good friends.
Finn made a stupid mistake, but he isn't a bad guy really. For me, our friendship is strictly platonic now, but he does annoy the heck outta Lexa...
Lexa.
I'm getting off track here. Lexa actually sounds... kinda mad. Is that because I forgot to text her or is it because she thought I was with Finn?
Costia though, that bitc-- Nope, she isn't worth my anger.
"I didn't go with Finn," I shake my head, bumping into her shoulder with my own. "He's in my art class now remember and he was there buying his own stuff."
"How could I forget." She rolls her eyes and before I could read anything more into it, the sound of one of her fan club members approaching interrupts us. It's only Jasper though, thank goodness! I don't think I could deal with Costia right now.
"Hey!" He calls out, beginning to jog once Lexa acknowledges him. He's so eager to reach us that he trips over his own feet in his haste. His floppy hair permanently getting into his dark eyes these days, although the positive change in him recently has been remarkable. Since Lexa has taken him under her wing - he's stopped smoking so much weed. He's not spending every evening alone playing the Xbox and he's even become more sociable.
Jasper seems happy again now. He'd kinda retreated into his shell when Monty started dating Harper. It had always been Jasper and Monty - brothers against the world - for so long, that he'd become lost. Thanks to Lexa he had gained confidence and more people were taking him seriously, and now when Monty and Harper invite him to hang out with them - he says yes.
He really is like the little brother I never had.
"Lexa!" He waves again with a big grin on his face. "It worked! Your mixed CD idea worked!" Jasper bound forward like an excited puppy throwing himself on the ground at our feet. "Maya totally loved it and she said she'd go to the dance with me! Oh, hey Clarke."
"Hey." I pretend to be offended - it's not like I've known him since I was three or anything.
"Jas that's great!" Lexa sounds genuinely happy for him. Swoon. "I told you Maya liked you." She pulls him forward for a congratulatory hug.
Jasper and fellow art lover Maya are perfect for each other and I'm glad they're getting their shit together. Unlike me, who is still stuck in the friend zone.
I guess if Jas can do it...
Oh yeah, sorry. The dance I hear you ask. Well, it's the annual Valentine's Day dance, and this year the students thought it would be a good idea if the theme were famous couples throughout history. I know right, they thought long and hard about that one. Regardless, you can be an actual real life couple or a fictitious one.
Lincoln and Octavia are going as James Bond and Miss Moneypenny from the 1960s.
Apparently Linc is a big fan, and wants to do the whole tuxedo thing.
Monty and Harper want to be Jack and Rose from Titanic.
It's Harper's favourite movie and she insists that she wouldn't leave Monty to freeze in the icy water like Rose did to Jack; so it's okay.
Bellamy and Echo will be going as Romeo and Juliet, because their families haven't always seen eye to eye in the past. Not after Bel's mom got fired from Echo's dad's printing company, but that is a whole other drama (which has gotten better - so don't worry).
I guess with this dance coming up, this would be the perfect way to finally ask Lexa to be my date.
Yeah, I can do this.
Right, back to Jasper...
"Thanks Lexa," his cheeks turn a shade of pink. "We've even picked out our costumes. I'm gonna be Rocky Balboa!"
Me and Lex exchange a wry smile at that, because Jasper is kinda lacking in the muscle department. He has always loved the movies, so who really cares!
"How romantic." I smile, the playful sarcasm in my tone clear to hear.
Jasper scoffs, narrowing his eyes at me like I'm some clueless fool. "Rocky and Adrian are soulmates, Clarke. Think about it, she stuck by him through everything. When he was a nobody, when he was rich. When his face was all messed up from the fights. That is real love."
"Guess you're right." I shrug. He'd clearly given this a lot of thought.
"Yeah, when you put it like that," Lexa smiles. "It's a perfect choice."
His grin became even wider at her words. "What about you Lexa? Who are you going as?"
Hmmm, a question I'd like to know the answer to as well.
"I was thinking about going as Nicole Haught," she shrugs. "I think I'd look good in a Stetson. What do you think, Clarke?" She asks with her forest green eyes locked onto mine.
Wow! Can we please take a moment to visualize this. . . . .
And I'm back... Mmm.. I have one thing to say about that. Yum!
"Y-yeah." I had to go and stutter didn't I. Way to act chill, Clarke. Fool.
"I love that show." Jasper nods firmly, liking the idea too.
What Lexa said next had me feeling light-headed.
"All I need now is to find my Waverly."
She? Was that? Nah, she couldn't... but it almost sounded like a hint. You heard that right? Lexa was looking right at me when she said it too.
Should a heart be beating this fast?
"Well, that won't be a problem for you, Lexa. You already have a shit-ton of girls who'd jump at the chance to go with you."
He was right, she did.
"There's only one girl--"
Before Lexa could finish what she planned to say; Octavia picks this exact moment to shout for her fellow teammate halfway across the field.
Thanks O!
"Woods! Practice now!" The brunette waved, with the cheerleaders not far behind her - looking at Lexa like she's their next meal.
Excuse me! I resent that remark guys! I have never ogled... or lusted after Lexa.. Alright! I have, but there is no need for your judgmental eyes. You'd drool over my Lexa too and don't even try to deny it. Because you would, not that I blame you.
The point is that I don't want Lexa to be the filling in-between that cheerleader sandwich!
Yuck! Of course Lexa would wave back at them. Suck ups!
"Since you've asked so nicely." Lexa shouts back, her voice still the epitome of calm.
Now when Lexa first moved here, she put Octavia's nose out of joint. O who considered herself master of the football field didn't like the new girl showing up and being better than her. They kinda butted heads a lot until Octavia realized that Lexa's skill and knowledge made their team a billion times better. Now, Octavia hangs out with Lexa almost as much as I do. I will admit that I was a little jealous at first, but I needn't have been. They're just great friends.
There goes my quiet lunch with Lex though.
"Do you two wanna throw the ball around with us?" Lexa offers getting to her feet, extending her hand out to me - helping me to my feet also.
Such a gentlewoman, isn't she?
"Yeah!" Jasper nods, trying to act cool with several pairs of beady eyes watching us.
Blah! Here comes Costia - sauntering toward Lexa like she's on some Victoria secret catwalk. Does this girl ever quit?
Obviously not!
"Lexa," her sweet voice practically purrs. "I made you some lunch again. On the menu today, you have: Turkey quinoa stuffed bell peppers." She giggles showing Lex the food container.
Yep, it looked delicious.
Does she think she's some kinda 1950s house wife? I could have made Lexa food if that is what she wanted.
"Wow, Cos. Thank you," Lexa smiles warmly - clearly appreciating all the effort she'd gone to. "But you didn't have to go to all this trouble."
The suck up giggles again, softly pushing Lexa in her arm. "It's no trouble, if it's for you Lexa. Plus it's high in protein, can't have you eating yucky cafeteria food can we?"
"It is making me a little hungry," Lexa is still smiling when she turns to me again. "Clarke, are you coming?"
"I would but," ... I really don't wanna be around Costia and her adulation for longer than necessary. "I want to make a head start on my painting."
I try to ignore the butterflies that erupt in my stomach at Lexa's obvious disappointment. I also try to ignore the virtual laser beams shooting out of Costia's brown eyes - aimed at me.
Yeah, Miss Cheerleader, Lexa wants me around too.
"Save you a seat in English?" I ask her, which is ridiculous because if Lexa asked to sit at the teacher's desk - I'm sure she'd let her, but I've gotta ask before Costia beats me to it.
"Always."
With that I watch her walk away trying to keep my eyes from staring at her fine ass.
Total fail.
-
One pizza slice later and I still haven't figured out how I'm going to ask Lexa to be my date for the dance.
Do I ask her out casually?
Be all like Hey Lex, I can be your Waverly if you'd like?
Nope!
I could make some sweeping gesture?
Show up at her door with flowers or a lit candle like Willow did for Tara - back in the day? Lexa does like her candles.
Urgh!! This should be easy!
Before I go back to painting and procrastinating, I hear feet shuffling behind me.
One guess. Yeah, it's Finn.
"Hey Clarke."
"Oh, hey Finn."
I smile turning back to the sink to finish washing all of the green paint from my brushes. There is nothing worse than paint clogged bristles! I can't wait to show Lexa my new art piece. I may have been a little - a lot - inspired by her.
"You've started on the assignment already?"
He steps up beside me, once his eyes have finished raking over every inch of the canvas. He seemed a mixture of stunned and awed.
I nod, shaking off the excess water from my now clean brushes. "Since art is my passion, yeah. I couldn't wait. I had so many ideas when she told us we could have free expression."
Letting out a loud puff of breath, he hops up on a nearby desk. "You looking forward to the dance?"
Okay, sudden subject change there. I guess someone hasn't got a clue what his project will be.
"Isn't everyone."
"Sure," he watches me with an easy smile. "You know I was thinking.. since you don't have a date yet, maybe we could go together?"
Umm what? He thinks... Did he just? He did, didn't he? After everything?
What is he thinking? Is he thinking at all?
Nope!
In my silence he continues.
"Since it's couples theme - I was going as Flynn Rider.. you know from Tangled?"
"Finn we're friends." I tell him gently, but he doesn't seem to get it.
His smile only gets wider. "You've seen Tangled, right?"
"Yep, I've seen Tangled, but I don't think you're listening to me. I--"
"Great!" He butts in. "Then it couldn't be more perfect. You can be my Rapunzel, Clarke. I've already rented out my costume. I'll have to grow in some facial hair, but--"
My turn to interrupt.
"Finn! I'm sorry, but I don't want to go to the dance with you," I don't mean to sound rude, but it looks like I've gotta spell it out here. I don't wanna get his hopes up. Whatever he thought we had is looooong over. "I already have my heart set on asking somebody else."
"Oh? It isn't Lexa is it?"
My heart starts to beat faster at his tone. Like he knows something I don't.
"Why?"
He shrugs his shoulders so nonchalantly that I actually feel like hitting him!
"Because Costia just asked her and she said yes."
Everything stops.
The sound of his irritatingly laid-back voice. My labored breathing. The faint buzz from the fluorescent lights. All I hear now is static fuzz pounding in my ears.
It can't be true.
No. She wouldn't. She doesn't like Cos like that. She... She..
I've missed my chance. It's over.
She doesn't feel the same.
I won't cry. Not here. Not in front of Finn.
I need time to process this.
"Are you sure?" I ask him and if my voice sounded shaky - well, that's how I feel.
"Yeah. You know how fast gossip spreads around here. Especially if it's about Lexa."
I should call her, find out for myself, but I don't.
Because if it is true, then. . .
"I gotta go." I mumble, grabbing all my things and throwing them into my backpack.
I just need to get out of here.