Work Text:
He gave Jinki a quick glance. The man was leaning against the other side of the elevator, head lolled against the metal of the side, arms crossed over his chest, and eyes closed. His bottom lip was being chewed on and Jonghyun knew he was overthinking things. Their huge fight outside the restaurant they were at for Minho’s birthday was still hanging over their heads, like a guillotine with the rope about to be cut. The elevator dinged as they arrived at their floor and Jinki made no move to leave. With a heavy breath, Jonghyun moved out, throwing his arm out to block the doors from closing too soon. He was unlocking their front door when he heard Jinki’s soft footsteps padding against the wood of the hallway floor.
He left the door open as he went into the small dining room, placing his coat on the table along with his keys. The file on the kitchen counter caught his eye and he deeply frowned. Jinki’s coat was tossed on the couch, his full pockets thunking a little as it hit. When Jonghyun turned to look at him he was leaning against the back of the couch with his arms crossed over his chest. “So are we going to talk about what happened at the party Jonghyun?”
“What is there to talk about?” He grumbled, turning away to fuss unnecessarily with his jacket.
“Oh, the ‘If he even stays around’ comment when Minho’s mom invited us to Christmas isn’t something to talk about?” Jinki calmly asked. “Am I going somewhere I don’t know about Jonghyun?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Sorry to disappoint you yet again, but we’re most definitely going to talk about it.” Jinki gestured toward him with his hand. “What made you so angry Jonghyun?”
“You’re leaving me!”
Jinki visibly flinched. “What do you mean?”
With a few steps, Jonghyun slammed his hand on the file and turned, fuming, as he held it up. “This! I saw the fucking job offer. You’re moving across the fucking country and leaving me here.”
“I haven’t given that as much as a glance since my boss handed it to me.” Jinki refuted, brows furrowing. “You really think I’d just decide on moving across the damn country and leave you?”
“You didn’t even bring it up!”
“Because I’m not fucking interested?” Jinki stepped away from the couch, arms falling from across his chest. “What’s the point of talking about it if I don’t want the damn job?”
“You brought it home. You’ve been distant lately.” Jonghyun frowned. “Why would you have a file if you weren’t planning on looking through it?”
“Because my boss handed it to me and told me to think about it. I took it home and laid it on that counter and haven’t touched it since. You really got me fucked up Jonghyun.” Jinki’s calm demeanor was gone, his tone of voice rising as well as the volume. “We’ve been together for years Jonghyun. Is my love that feeble to you that you think I’d just drop you like that? I’ve been really fucking busy at work this week and I thought you understood that. I guess my love and this relationship doesn’t mean the loyalty and devotion I thought it did.”
“You’re the one pulling away and keeping secrets.” Jonghyun hissed. “You should just fucking leave. Get out!”
His anger dwindled when he saw the tears in Jinki’s eyes. His heart ached a little as Jinki’s gaze fell, little sniffles as he wiped his nose with the back of his finger. When Jinki looked up again his expression showed just how hurt he was. “Since you want me to leave so badly, consider us done Jonghyun.”
He grabbed his coat, slipped on his shoes and grabbed his keys from the hook. He looked back once, just before he took the last step out, but then he was continuing on his way and slamming the door behind him.
----
The phone on the bed was buzzing, vibrating against the comforter, as he gazed over at it from the closet. He knew it was probably Minho, making sure their plans were still on, and if he was ready. The phone was ignored as his attention returned to the mirror he was standing in front of. With a frown he lifted the shirt from his frame, tossing it somewhere behind him. Half of the closet still held Jinki’s things. His suits and dress shirts, the graphic tees he’s had since high school, and his collection of soft cotton t-shirts. He swallowed thickly, running his fingers over the neatly hung shirts. He figured Jinki would return for them eventually, from wherever he went after the breakup, but just the thought of them not being there made Jonghyun’s chest ache. Minho invited him on a few night trip up to the cabin he has with his partner Kibum, to get his mind off his breakup, but all he wanted to do was lay in bed and wallow in his sadness. Even with the promise of going to the bar in the town at the bottom of the mountain, it was hard for him to actually want to go.
He missed him. It had only been a week. He missed him so much. He wishes he could take back what was said, return to the time before their huge fight and erase the breakup from happening. He knew he never should of ordered Jinki out of their home like that. He was worried about him, wondering where he went if he was safe and okay. How could he go to the cabin with Minho and Kibum without Jinki like all the times before?
His hand fell from the clothes as he glanced once at the phone before his choice was made for him. He wiggled from his jeans and kicked them over by the closet door. His hand fell on one of Jinki’s cotton t shirts before he could think of it. The soft fabric fell over him, landing at his upper thigh. He lifted the collar over his nose and his eyes fluttered a little at how much it still smelt like him. He climbed into bed, fingers curling around his phone as he made his way up to the pillows. After a moment of an inner debate, he crawled under the covers on Jinki’s side, nuzzling his face into his pillow as his eyes closed for a moment. He knew he should text Minho and tell him he wasn’t going to make it, but the warmth and comfort of being surrounded by Jinki hindered him from doing much else. The ache in his chest was a dull, throb. The bittersweet feeling of comfort stopping the overwhelming feeling of missing him but also reminding him there was no longer a them.
That reminded him. He needed to re-record their answer machine message. Finally, he lifted his phone up to his face and sent a quick message before tossing the device on the other side of the mattress. He knew Minho would be upset with him, disappointed he wasn’t trying to get his mind off of Jinki, but he couldn’t force himself to have fun when his heart was missing. His phone was going crazy, probably Minho calling him to convince him to go. His suitcase was was open, half packed on the floor by the end of the bed. He only would need to throw a few things into it to be ready to go, but is mind was made up.
It was about an hour later he heard someone unlocking the front door. Slowly he pushed up from the bed, confused as to who would be coming in that had a key. His question of who was there fell from his lips when Jinki stepped through the half closed door. The man looked like a deer in headlights as he noticed him in the bed. His fingers were turning white with how harsh he was gripping the bag in his hands. “I didn’t think you’d be home. I came to get my stuff … I can come back later. You probably don’t want to see me.”
As he turned to leave Jonghyun called out, “Jinki wait!” He sat up more in bed, comforter falling around him. He sighed deeply and looked down at his hands when he noticed Jinki was frozen in the doorway. “You can get your things. It’s good to see you.”
Jinki swallowed thickly, and then he noticed what Jonghyun was wearing and he softened. His voice was so warm, almost like tea with honey as he spoke in a quiet tone. “You’re wearing my shirt.”
“Ah.. yeah,” Jonghyun’s cheeks were a soft pink as he averted his eyes from the man. “I, uh, was missing you. Instead of going on a trip with Minho and Kibum, I stayed here to wallow in my broken relationship.”
Jinki rushed intake of breath startled him a little and when he gazed up at him the man’s eyes were glossy. “I thought you’d hate me.”
“What? Why?”
“The fight and breaking up,” Jinki bit his lower lip, his nervous tick. “I waited until I thought you’d be gone on your trip because I thought you’d hate to see me.”
“Oh Jinki,” He wiggled a little to free his legs from the blankets, “How’d you know I’d be going on the trip?”
“I was staying with Kibum.” Jinki softly confessed.
With careful movements Jonghyun climbed from the bed, stepping over his suitcase hanging out from the corner of the bed, and standing in front of Jinki. “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. I’ve missed you so much.”
Jinki swallowed thickly before speaking again, “I kept wanting to call, to come over and try to fix it, but you were so angry with me and the way you looked at me when you ordered me to leave… thought you wouldn’t want to try to fix it all.”
Jonghyun’s bottom lip began to tremble at Jinki’s words, and he tried so hard to keep his voice level, “I regretted ordering you out the moment the front door closed behind you.”
“Can I come home, Jonghyunie?” He softly asked. The smile on Jinki’s face was hopeful, his eye showing how his entire heart was hanging on those five words. Without another word Jonghyun was rushing into his chest, arms tight around his middle. Jinki curled around him, arms going under his arms, one going to cradle his head and the other curling around Jonghyun’s shirt. “I’m so sorry Baby. I love you so much.”
He felt Jonghyun’s fingers tighten in his jacket, nuzzling his face into his chest. Jinki took a deep breath, finally forcing himself from being pressed against Jonghyun. He cupped his face gently, smiling sweetly as he wiped his cheeks, “Hey, we have a lot to talk about, but we can’t do that when you’re crying Baby.”
A soft hiccup left his lips when Jonghyun tried to speak. His eyes widened before he looked away a little shy. “I’m just emotional.”
“I know,” Jinki sniffled, trying so hard to keep his own emotions in check. “Do you want to cuddle until you’re ready to talk?”
Jonghyun softly nodded, a tiny smile on his face as Jinki took a step back to pull his jacket off his frame and toss it on the dresser against the wall. He curled his fingers around Jinki’s wrist and led him closer to the bed. Once they were under the covers Jonghyun shifted, and before Jinki knew it he was laying on him, thighs on either side of his hips and head under his chin. Jinki was softly chuckling when Jonghyun grumbled, “Shut up.”
With a slight movement, he pressed a kiss to his dark hair, arms wrapped around him and moving softly on his back. After a moment he confessed, “I’m really happy you didn’t go to the cabin.”
“Me too.”