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Jane thought punching Loki the first time felt good. Getting to punch him four times before Topaz pulled her off him felt even better. “You should have stayed dead!” she shouted, trying to wriggle free. Loki just stared at her in disbelief.
“Janey, Janey, Janey,” the Grandmaster laughed as he watched the spectacle. “What about my new guest has got you so, uh, worked up?”
“Remember the boyfriend’s brother I mentioned?” she asked, finally breaking out of Topaz’s grip.
“This is the invade-y one that died?" The Grandmaster’s eyes moved up and down Loki.
“We thought he died,” Jane muttered.
“Well, that’s a story I have to hear.”
“I hope you’ll excuse me, then, sir. I still have a lot of work to do.” Jane shot Loki another glare before looking at the Grandmaster again.
“Alright, Janey, just give be sure to give me an update on your gizmos and doodads tomorrow,” he said breezily. Jane clenched her teeth in a smile and resisted the urge to punch him too.
Living in a high-tech alien civilization where she got to work with their tech had been a lot cooler in her head. Asgard had been closer, and that had included an evil alien parasite using her as a host and sapping her energy, Odin insulting her and demeaning her, invasion by evil elves who killed Frigga, getting put under house arrest, and a really exhausting escape.
Here on Sakaar, she had basically become the Grandmaster’s pet for a year and a half, and she was pretty sure he kept sending his minions to mess with her stuff when she went to sleep or left her lab, just to keep her around.
And now Loki was around. Joy.
After that little run-in, the mandatory parties became even more intolerable, one giant game of keep-away-from-Loki-and-the-Grandmaster. If she’d had any kind of political savvy, she’d have tried to get Loki an appointment with the pardoning stick, but she knew how to pick her battles, and the god of mischief was the last person to have a political vendetta with.
So she kept her head down. Pilfered what she could to keep building her portal back home. She would finish it eventually, the Grandmaster was only delaying the inevitable.
Then came the day when there was actually a reason to be at the party. She was hiding in the corner, making a few adjustments to the quantum screwdriver she’d cobbled together when she smelled electrical discharge and heard a very familiar, deep voice. Thor, shouting Loki’s name.
“Hey!” She crammed the screwdriver back into her pocket as she tried to charge after the guards wheeling him away, only for her skirt to get pinned down by someone’s foot. Whirling around, she saw the Grandmaster smiling at her, looking higher than usual.
“What’s the hurry, Janey?”
“Please tell me you are not sending my boyfriend into the arena,” she implored.
“Ohhh, right, Lord of Thunder would be your boyfriend, wouldn’t he?” The Grandmaster chuckled. “Maybe we should play that up in the promotions beforehand. You’re coming to the match, no arguments.”
“Are you kidding me? No, I’m not going to be part...how the hell did this even happen?”
“142 found him. Said he’s a contender.”
“142 is a nihilistic alcoholic mess who doesn’t care about anyone but herself!” Jane fumed. “Call it off. He’s not a slave.”
“Janey.”
“I am not calling them prisoners with jobs!”
“Shh, shh, save some of that spitfire for the main event.”
Oh, she really wanted to punch him.
Thor opened his eyes to find Jane sitting over him. “I don’t suppose this is Valhalla,” he croaked.
“Not exactly.” She bent down and kissed him very softly before dabbing at one of the cuts on his arms. “I’m so sorry this all happened to you.”
“How are you here?” He tried to sit up, but she placed a hand on his chest.
“Stay down, I’m still working. And to answer your question, Imploded wormhole generator in my lab. I don’t know how long it’s been on Earth, but it’s been a year and a half here,” she admitted.
“Oh, Jane.” He stopped as he realized there was someone else in the room, breathing heavily. Despite Jane’s best efforts, he sat up, making out the form of the Hulk sitting in what looked like a hot tub. For a moment, the two of them stared at each other. “Are we good?” Thor prompted, receiving only a huff in reply.
“Look, I need to get back to my lab before it gets trashed too much,” Jane interjected. “The Grandmaster keeps trying to curb my progress. But I promise, I’ll be back as soon as I can. But first,” she paused to produce an odd looking wand-like instrument from the pocket of her dress. “Let’s see if I can’t get this off.” She held it up to the disk on his neck and Thor winced as it sparked against his skin. “I’m sorry, hold on, almost...got it.” She pulled the disk off. “Hang on to this, you might need it.”
“Clever as always, Jane Foster.” He smiled, and she kissed him again, a little more aggressively this time. “You swear to return?”
“I give you my word.” She deepened her voice to intimidate him, and he managed to laugh.
“Puny science girl,” Hulk muttered.
“Banner likes Jane,” retorted Thor. “And we need to talk.”
Jane was in the middle of working on the spectrometer when the guards came and dragged her into the throne room where the Grandmaster was dismissing Scrapper 142 and Loki.
“Janey, I’m really sorry to do this, but your boyfriend’s gonna have to die. It’s sad, you two must’ve been cute, but this is business.”
Then it clicked, just as the guards released their grips on her arms. “You’re about to try and make me into a hostage, aren’t you?”
The Grandmaster chuckled. “Sorry, but it’s poetic, you know?”
“Please, don’t.”
“Janey—”
“Right, looks like I have to do this.” She pulled out her screwdriver and hit the detonator switch she’d hidden on the end, throwing it on the ground before she started running. “Bye!” The blast went off just as the mooks started chasing her, giving her the chance to swerve in the same direction she’d seen Loki and 142 go. And 142 had Loki knocked out flat on his back. “I wanna know how you did that.”
“You’re with the blond idiot?”
“Thor?”
“Yeah, him.”
“We’re a thing, yeah.”
“Then come on.”
“Surprise.”
Thor immediately flung the nearest bottle at Loki’s head, just to make sure he was real, then noticed Jane scribbling on the walls. “Hjarta, what are you doing?”
“Well, thing is, all my research is back in my lab at the Grandmaster’s palace, so I can’t go back and get it, which means we don’t have my wormhole generator to get out of here. Which means we’re gonna need to go through one of the wormholes, and our best shot is probably the big one, which is also dealing with a collapsing neutron star—”
“I tried to tell her that we should find a clean portal, but apparently, she’s insisting on the Devil’s Anus,” Valkyrie complained.
“Hey, after what you told me about Hela, we’re on a time crunch, right, Brynnhilde?” Jane shot back. “So, anyway, I’m trying to get the coordinates down right, because we’re only going to have one shot.”
“And we’re going to need a ship,” Valkyrie interjected. “Mine would get torn to pieces in that thing."
“The Grandmaster has a great many ships. And I may have the access codes,” Loki spoke up, only to get another bottle launched in his direction by Valkyrie.
“He’s not serious, is he?” Banner asked. “We’re not actually going to trust him?”
“He’s Loki,” Thor said with a groan. “We can trust him to what’s in his best interests, which currently align with ours.”
“Thor,” Jane said warningly. “Remember what happened last time.” Thor turns his palm to her briefly, showing the obedience disc she pulled off him.
“We will work with what we have. But first, we need to start a revolution.”