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“I’m in hell.”
“That’s nice, dear.”
Yuta pouts, clearly not satisfied with his husband's lack of empathy over his current situation. It’s probably for the best, because if Jaehyun gives him even an inch Yuta will take miles upon miles, taking a break only to indulge in dramatics not suited for a man his age in a family friendly mall. Curse his husband and his keen knowledge of all things Nakamoto.
“Doyoung’s a Marxist, why are we even bothering?” The shorter tries once more, not so subtly eyeing Jaehyun’s ass when he bends over to adjust something on the stroller.
“Because Taeyong wants to play White Elephant and I’ll be damned if we get upstaged by Jungwoo and Kun’s superb appliance taste again.”
“That baby food magic bullet is a blessing.”
“I know, and I hate it. Which is why--”
“We’re getting the special edition k-cafe keurig if it kills you. Yeah. I get it.” He does. White elephant is just a competition for best gift giver and one thing he and Jaehyun do not do is lose. It’s only part of the reason he agreed to accompany his husband to the mall today despite him wanting to do literally anything else.
“And since we’re here, might as well get the cutest Christmas card too,” Jaehyun says matter of factly as he squeezes Yuta’s chin all sweet and persuasive. It doesn’t do anything to quell Yuta’s impatience for waiting in line, even if it is to see Santa, but Jaehyun has that sparkle in his eye and his nose is bright red from the cold and his hair’s pushed back in the most dreamy way possible and Yuta is just a man, okay?
With practiced swiftness, he pinches Jaehyun’s bum before leaning over to look into their stroller (overpriced and high tech, graciously gifted by Yuta’s mother during their baby shower) to the squirming bundle of joy tucked inside. Yuta is immediately met with his favorite gummy smile and a squeal of joy and he couldn’t help the coo that escapes his mouth even if he wanted to.
“Hi NewNew,” he greets all soft and excited. Jaemin reacts with the sweetest giggle in the world, looking extra adorable when he’s bundled up in a nine month old sized winter coat, gloves, and a Johnny Seo limited edition hand knit beanie. Yuta unbuckles their son to haul him into his arms and Jaemin babbles and gurgles in delight, big brown eyes immediately wandering to take in his surroundings. Jaemin has always been a curious and friendly baby, quick to smile at strangers and squeal at their games of peek-a-boo in the grocery store. It seemed that Jaemin hadn’t stopped smiling ever since he figured out how to, and Yuta would be lying if he said that it didn’t make him feel all warm and fuzzy to know that their baby was the happiest he could be.
“Capitalistic indulgences will be the downfall of our society, won’t it, NewNew?” Yuta coos before blowing a raspberry into Jaemin’s chubby cheek. Jaehyun gives Yuta A Look but joins in blowing a raspberry into Jaemin’s other chubby cheek, and their baby is absolutely ecstatic about this new development, squealing high and loud and bouncing in Yuta’s arms.
“Tell daddy to stop being such a grinch,” Jaehyun teases right back. “Because NewNew wants to meet Santa and be in the cutest Christmas card of the season.” Jaemin stares at Jaehyun as he speaks, poking at the deep dimples that decorate his dad’s face when he smiles and singsongs the last bit of his statement.
If Yuta hadn’t been the first to give Johnny and Winwin shit for their over attachment to Donghyuck, then he’d be more willing to admit the fact that the only reason he didn’t stay home today was that he knew he’d miss Jaemin. Jaehyun would have been more than willing to send dozens of precious selfies, but as cute as Jaemin looks in every Snapchat filter, a picture can’t exactly replicate the feeling of holding their baby to his chest, hearing his giggle in real time, feeling his tiny hands tug at his ears and nose. Yuta had never been a father before, but he was almost certain that the need to constantly hold and coddle Jaemin would fade after the first few months.
He was, without any doubt, pathetically wrong. As much as he enjoyed date nights with Jaehyun and the odd dinner party at Jungwoo’s, his child was always at the back of his mind. He knew Jaehyun felt the same way, but he was much better at hiding his emotions than Yuta ever has been.
It’s sappy and unfamiliar, but he can’t bring himself to care about the intricacies of emotional attachment when Jaemin takes his face in his tiny hands, babbling nonsensical joy.
Yuta scrunches his nose to give Jaemin an eskimo kiss. “What if he poops on Santa.”
“His pooping face is cute,” Jaehyun shrugs. “That’s probably a little biased, though.”
“Nah, he’s objectively the cutest baby in the world,” Yuta half jokes, lighting up like a tacky storefront Christmas Tree when Jaehyun laughs. He doesn’t hesitate to press a quick peck to Jaehyun’s lips.
They live and breathe the romance of the season: indoor hot chocolate dates, mistletoe hung up on every door frame in their home, strolls under elaborate light setups, etc. But the expectations of the holidays can be a struggle for them. Yuta hates crowds and Jaehyun’s people pleasing tendencies don’t allow for him to buy anything that he can’t touch or see in person first. Present purchasing is difficult at best, but Jaemin has made the most wonderful time of year a little more bearable when he isn’t pulling disappearing acts via his newly acquired skill in crawling.
“We could have just staged our own cutest photoshoot ever, you know,” Yuta tries as a last ditch effort to get out of the line. Jaehyun tuts.
“Mall santas add at least ten points to your Christmas card cuteness score, babe.” Jaehyun’s right, as usual, but he’s never one to stop there. “Don’t you want Jaemin to meet Santa as early as possible? You know he’ll love it.”
“Your point is not specific to this situation. He loves everything that can make a face at him or emit noise,” Yuta sighs, lowering Jaemin’s feet to the floor in front of him. He holds Jaemin’s hands in his, allowing their baby to stumble and flail on his feet as he wishes. When the line moves in front of them, Yuta guides Jaemin to take clumsy steps with him. It’s, quite frankly, the most amazing thing Yuta’s ever seen. Both of his dads cheer him on, most definitely embarrassing themselves but luckily Jaemin’s not old enough to care yet. Jaehyun thinks Yuta doesn’t catch him snapping a few pictures with his phone.
The fact that Jaemin will be walking on his own soon enough frazzles Yuta. He doesn’t bother to think about what’s beyond that, brain not letting him process the idea of Jaemin growing up into an actual human being who talks and walks and eats food that has more density than bread and rice.
“Oh good, the kid who was supposed to go before us started crying. Let’s go let’s go let’s go,” Jaehyun rushes as he scoops Jaemin up and scurries over to the platform where Santa awaits in front of a camera, framed by hanging snowflakes and meticulously decorated Christmas trees. Yuta picks up into a jog to catch up with his husband, pushing the stroller carefully.
“Okay NewNew, be good for Santa,” Jaehyun reminds, kissing Jaemin on the nose once before plopping him onto the stranger’s lap. The mall Santa lets out a practiced chuckle and Jaemin doesn’t seem to mind the new arrangement, eyes focused on the tinsel surrounding him as he gurgled in excitement.
Yuta introduces himself to the woman behind the camera, who lets out an appreciative hum at how photogenic Jaemin is. “You have a beautiful family,” she assures and Yuta beams with pride.
Jaehyun’s taken it upon himself to kneel just out of the frame, cooing and playing peek-a-boo with Jaemin to make sure he’s smiling in the right direction.
“What’s their name? NewNew….?” The photographer clarifies, snapping one photo out of the three they’re willing to splurge on. Yuta stops mid funny face to answer. “It’s Jaemin. NewNew’s his nickname.” One affectionately inserted into their vocabulary after Jaehyun had exclaimed for the twentieth time during their baby’s first week home that Jaemin, tiny and long-awaited for, was “so brand new!”
The photographer nods as if it makes sense, and Yuta knows that they’re probably not the oddest family she’s had to deal with that day.
“Hi NewNew! Hi starshine,” Jaehyun coos and waves, hoping for Jaemin to move around and grin like he always does when his dads greet him.
The physical response is expected-- a drooly giggle and his signature bounce. The other response is not expected.
“Hi,” Jaemin greets his dad, clear as day.
The photographer takes a picture, but both fathers have gone dead silent.
“Hi!” Yuta frantically responds and moves at the speed of light to pick Jaemin up from Santa’s lap for hundreds and hundreds of kisses. “Hi!” he keeps repeating as Jaemin squeals. Jaehyun has burst into full on tears, bumbling something incomprehensible as he walks over to join his husband in kissing their child silly.
God bless her professionality, the photographer had taken the last shot with all of them in frame and was infinitely patient when Jaehyun stumbled with his debit card as he paid her. He was sniffling like an idiot, attempting to verbalize that it was Jaemin’s first intentional, clear word. And they had captured the moment in a photograph. The photographer can only nod and smile.
Balancing Jaemin on his hip as he waits for his husband, Yuta texts their groupchat with as much eloquence as possible.
Super Dads HQ
yuta : FRSITJ WROD
yuta : FIRIST WOROD SFIIRST EEJ
doyoung : who
taeyong : ?
johnny : FIRST WORD
sicheng : FIRST WORD
doyoung : FIRST WORD
taeyong : FIRST WORD
jungwoo : FIRST WORD
kun : FIRST WORD
jungwoo : FACETIME ME NOW
taeyong : NO FAIR WE’RE AT A RESTAURANT
sicheng : UM. EXCUSE ME
johnny : WE’RE THE GODPARENTS WE HAVE FACETIME RIGHTS
kun : This is a lawless land, Seo.
“We have to facetime Jungwoo,” Yuta tells Jaehyun when he approaches with the stroller and physical copies of their photos, leaning in to kiss the tear tracks on his husband’s cheeks. “You good?”
Jaehyun nods, returning the kiss when he leans in to hold Jaemin’s tiny hands. “I’m just. Really happy. My starshine worked so hard to say his first word, didn’t he?”
Jaemin, ever the smart one, giggles out another “hi!” and Yuta could have sworn he heard the beginnings of a “dada” in there somewhere too.
When they do end up FaceTiming Jungwoo, who’s in the middle of a selfcare day, Jaemin is more than happy to show off his new word. Jungwoo coos and babytalks as if his life depends on it and Jaemin finds nothing but delight in Jungwoo’s bright orange face mask and the Santa shaped cookies Kun is munching on right beside him.
“Ah, Kunie, I want one,” Jungwoo whines, shaking his phone when Jaemin smiles. It takes some time for Kun to realize that Jungwoo is not talking about a cookie, but he brightens up as soon as it clicks.
“Just a few more months, sweetheart. He’ll be here soon.”
Jaehyun and Yuta remember their own waiting for Jaemin to get here, and it’s almost surreal that he’s finally here, even after all the time they’ve spent with him.
“So what are you two getting for Yong’s Christmas party?” Jungwoo tries, the sinister smile of a master gift giver playing on his face.
“The best gift, that’s what,” Yuta and Jaehyun nearly say in sync, squeezing into the frame so Jungwoo and Kun know they mean business.
Kun scoffs, “I bet it’s a keurig.”
“Amateurs.”
“Eat my ass, Woo,” Jaehyun says before hanging up. “We need to step up our game.”
“Foot massager?” Yuta offers, buckling Jaemin into his stroller.
“Foot massager,” Jaehyun agrees.
It doesn’t really matter what they buy,Yuta can’t help but think, because they’ll never be as great of a gift giver as Jaemin is, the little scammer.