Archive of Our Own ^beta

“So,” Hoseok starts, as he expertly flips the meat on the grill in front of them, “a little birdie has told me that you’re dating Park Jimin.”

Immediately the table freezes, all attention directed to Yoongi who as usual, looks unbothered as he stuffs a ssam wrap into his mouth. The rest of the table doesn’t realize that that’s partially an answer. No one except Kim Seokjin.

He tries to hide his surprise while his mind’s combing through all the conversations where Yoongi’s mentioned Jimin. Something about him being a smiley sophomore in Hoseok’s dance group, who also had a great voice. Yoongi was thinking about asking him to sing on a guide track. But that was it. He definitely did not mention romance.

“Well?” Namjoon asks.

“It’s none of your damn business.”

And that was practically a signed confession. Seokjin chokes on the few grains of rice in his mouth but doesn’t take the water slid to him by Yoongi.

“I’m fine,” he says, even though there’s a sudden throbbing ache in the middle of his chest. He ignores the look that Yoongi gives him by stuffing meat into his mouth.

Maybe Namjoon and Hoseok can sense that something’s off because the topic quickly shifts to how they’re both dying in Professor Wong’s Greek Classics class. Seokjin only watches them argue about The Odyssey, grinning when Hoseok decides that enacting a scene would be the best way to prove his point. He’s loud enough to attract the ire of the owner, so they quickly end up paying and leaving.

“You guys wanna come over for a little?” Seokjin asks, his question forming a cold puff of air in the dark night.

“Nah, I gotta go to the dance studio. I’ll catch you guys later.” Hoseok gives them a two fingered salute and disappears into the crowd.

“You?” Seokjin nods at Namjoon.

“I think I might grab a cup of coffee, sober up a little.” Namjoon bids them farewell and strides off into the darkness.

And now Jin’s left with Yoongi, the last fucking thing that he wants, particularly since confrontation is not his strong suit, and so he hunkers deep down into his scarf and starts to march away.

“Aww, come on, hyung.” Yoongi grunts behind him. “You gotta at least tell me why you’re mad.”

Jin stops in his tracks, inexplicably even more annoyed that Yoongi isn’t even aware of why he’s very righteously mad, and feels Yoongi knock into his back. He turns to find Yoongi rubbing his head and glaring up at him, but he doesn’t care.

“Am I your best friend or not?”

“What kinda dumbass—”

“I’m your hyung. Answer the question.”

“Yes, you are.”

“And didn’t we promise never to keep secrets from each other?”

“Yes, we did,” Yoongi answers obediently. His head’s hanging now and Seokjin valiantly tries not to lose his anger at the sight.

“Did you do right or wrong?”

“I did wrong… But hyung!” Yoongi looks up with incredulity. “It kinda just happened!”

“Just happened?”

Yoongi’s ears are pink, though Jin’s not sure if that’s due to the cold or Yoongi being embarrassed. Oh, what a thought; Yoongi being embarrassed.

Jin’s pretty sure he should be laughing, but for some reason he feels unsettled.

“He kinda just asked me out today? You know I would have told you earlier if he made any move.” Yoongi reasons.

“Yeah, I know,” Jin says softly. Yoongi looks like he’s going to say more, but their bus pulls up and in the rush of getting on, it’s all forgotten. Besides, Jin’s more concerned about why he’s still feeling like Yoongi’s completely betrayed him.

He figures it out on their ten-minute bus ride when Yoongi slumps onto his shoulder and Seokjin’s so busy tracing his features, down his forehead and up the hill of his button nose, that he misses their stop.

Kim Seokjin has never kept a secret from his best friend, Min Yoongi. But this; this is a secret that he needs to keep for the sake of their friendship. This is a secret that can ruin everything, especially now that Park Jimin’s in the picture.

He looks to Yoongi, who’s still blissfully unaware to the world, and softly whispers an apology. 

“Hyung, I need help.” Yoongi calls from his room. Seokjin lets out a huff of annoyance from being distracted from his essay.

“If you’ve shaved a part of your hair again Yoongi, I swear to god, I’m not helping you.”

Yoongi’s head pops from his bedroom. “First of all, fuck you. Second, just help me pick out something to wear.”

“Wear?” Seokjin questions, as he puts his laptop aside and rises from the living room couch. “Since when did you need fashion advice?”

“Since I needed to look sexy.” Yoongi says, as Seokjin walks into his room to see clothes thrown all over Yoongi’s bed.

“Sexy?” Jin asks.

“Jimin’s taking me to a club.”

“Since when did you like to go clubbing?”

“Never,” Yoongi shrugs, “but Jimin’s a dancer.”

Since when you have been into dancers? is the next question that’s hesitating on Seokjin’s lips, but in fear of sounding like an interrogative parrot, he moves on.

“You know, that’s the first time you’ve ever said anything about him.”

“Really?” Yoongi replies absentmindedly, as he places a shirt and pant combo on himself and turns to Seokjin. “How do I look?” Seokjin rolls his eyes at the obvious subject change.

“You look like shit. But if you want my help, you bring him over for dinner.” Yoongi bites his lip, clearly debating the offer, which annoys Seokjin, because yes, Yoongi’s always been a little private, but this was a little too private, even for him.

“Fine.” He finally answers.

“Great!” Seokjin claps his hands together. “I’ll call up the rest of the gang too. Now, where’s that mesh tank I bought you last summer?”

“Hyung, it’s winter. ”                       

“Fashion hurts. Now go get it while I search for your blazer.”

In the end, Seokjin thinks that he’s done a fantastic job. Yoongi stands in front of him, wearing ripped black jeans, a silky black button down (the mesh tank was vetoed after Seokjin checked the weather), and a black blazer embellished with sequins (which Yoongi glared at him for). Seokjin’s also made him wear silver earrings (only because he ended up winning the half hour argument before it) and a couple of rings. (And he’s also discovered a new secret that he’s gotta keep quiet about). 

“Wait, there’s something missing.” Jin scans Yoongi  to spot the problem before the idea strikes him. He rushes off to his own room and runs back victoriously, clutching something small in his hand. Yoongi peers at it before refusing.

“Hyung, there is no way that I’m wearing eyeliner.”

“You said you wanted to look sexy. Sit down and shut up.” Seokjin waits until Yoongi closes his eyes and then drags a small line right above his eyelashes. He tilts his head, frowning for a second, before taking his thumb and rubbing hard on Yoongi’s lids.

“Jesus,” Yoongi said, jerking back. “What was that for?”

“Sexy means smudged eyeliner, Yoon.”

“Give me that,” Yoongi grumbles, snatching the eyeliner out of Seokjin’s hands and going to a mirror to put it on by himself. “Ok,” he says as he straightens up and swivels back to Seokjin, brows raised, “How is it?”

Seokjin’s saved from answering when a ring sounds from the plethora of clothes on Yoongi’s bed. “Shit,” Yoongi mutters, and scrambles to find it, expression clearing when he does. “It’s Jimin; he’s outside.” Yoongi jumps off his bed and rushes to put his coat on before jamming his wallet and phone in the side pockets.

“Thanks for helping me hyung! Don’t wait up!” Yoongi’s out the door in less than a second and Seokjin’s still looking behind him from Yoongi’s room. (He mentally adds a third and fourth secret to his list).

“Err, hyung? You sure you’re ok?”

It’s maybe the fifth time Namjoon has asked him this question and the redundancy‘s annoying but Seokjin has to admit it’s rooted in valid worry.

“I’m fine, Joon.” He replies again, as he finishes up the egg garnish for his japchae. Namjoon warily eyes the 10+ dishes of food on the table.

“If you say so.” The doorbell rings, and Seokjin sends Namjoon a pleading look. “Can you get that? I’m almost done.”

Namjoon rises from his stool and disappears behind the kitchen wall. The second the door opens, there’s loud noises, shrieks that definitely must be from Hoseok, and new voices that Seokjin’s never heard before. Seokjin takes one last glance at his food, making sure it looks delectable before making his own way to the door.

Only he’s stopped with a sudden…hug?

“Hyung!” A recognizable voice says, muffled because this person is still pressed against his chest. Seokjin manages to extract himself from the person to find Kim Taehyung’s grinning face.

“Yah, Kim Taehyung!” Seokjin looks him up and down, making sure he’s grown all right. “It’s been like a year, right?”

“More like forever. You know, Jiminie said that his boyfriend’s roommate was someone named Kim Seokjin, but I was like it can’t be Seokjin hyung. He would never room with an asshole like Yoongi!”

Seokjin furrows his brow at the ‘asshole’ remark and the complete drop of honorifics, but Tae’s already moved on.

“Look, I want you meet someone.” Tae turns around to grab a boy Seokjin’s height, dressed in all black, hoodie over his head and gifted with the cutest bunny teeth he’s ever seen.

“Oh my god,” Seokjin coos, hands reaching out without conscious volition. “I wanna smush his cheeks forever. He is so cute!”

“He has a name, you know.” The bunny says through squished lips. Seokjin quickly retracts his hands, face flushing.

“Ah, sorry,” Seokjin murmurs, hand coming to rub the back of his neck automatically.

“It’s ok; Tae already told me that you were touchy,” he shrugs off disinterestedly. Suddenly though, his eyes widen as he walks past Seokjin.

“Is that food for us?” he asks, gesturing to the feast that Seokjin has on the kitchen island.

“Uh, yeah.”

He then abruptly strides to the fridge. “Is that an Overwatch magnet?”

“Yup.”

The bunny turns to Seokjin with wide, pleading eyes. “My name is Jeon Jungkook. I’m 20. Please adopt me.”

“Funny you should say that, Kookie.” Hoseok chimes, as he appears from the door. “But I’m not sure Mom and Dad are sold on a third kid.”

“Mom and Dad?”

“It’s what I call Seokjin and Yoongi since they’re literally an old married couple.”

“Yah, don’t say things like that. What if Jimin gets the wrong idea?” Seokjin goes to swat at him, but Hoseok expertly dodges.

“I think it’s cute.” A new voice interjects. Seokjin turns to find Yoongi in their little entryway of sorts, and on his left, a younger man his height, presumably the voice that just spoke. “Oh, forgot to introduce myself. I’m Park Jimin. And really, the whole mom and dad thing is cute,” he says with a wide enough smile that makes his eyes disappear.

Fuck. “Kim Seokjin.” Jin weakly replies.

“Oh! It’s great to finally meet you! Yoongi’s said a lot. And I can’t believe you know Taehyung too!” His eyes catch on the table full of food. “Is that all for us?” he asks.

Dongsaengs, Seokjin tiredly thinks. “Let’s eat, shall we?”

It doesn’t take long for Seokjin to realize why Yoongi is charmed with Jimin. He’s adorable, what with his blinding smile, his sparkling eyes, and his laugh; oh, his laugh that makes Seokjin feel like he can visually see rainbows and unicorns fall out of Jimin’s mouth.

And he’s able to do things that Seokjin’s maybe allowed to do when Yoongi is drunk and not entirely present, or when they both need some comfort. His eyes slowly follow the way Jimin leans on Yoongi when they’re all on the floor playing Uno after dinner. The way that Yoongi so naturally lets him. The way that Jimin falls onto him laughing when something cracks him up. The fact that Yoongi doesn’t push him off or scrunch his nose in disgust.

Jimin starts to complain in the most adorable tone possible when the rest of them start to gang up on him because he’s the only one who has Uno. They stack Draw Two’s, a colorful rainbow of them, one on top of another, until it’s Yoongi’s turn.

“Please don’t tell me you have a Draw Two,” Jimin whines.

Yoongi looks at the cards in his hand and takes a glance at Jimin. He then loudly sighs.

“So how many cards do I have to take?”

“8, you have to take 8!” Yoongi groans while Jimin cheers. “Thanks, Kookie, for the red Draw Two,” he says, slamming a red ‘8’ on top of the pile. The rest of the group groans and starts to bully Yoongi for ruining their plans, but Jin barely hears it.

Because Yoongi’s always been the player that doesn’t realize that he’s showing his cards to everyone. It’s something that Hoseok and him have dragged him on since the first time they ever played a card game. And the sure way to get Yoongi to show you his hand is when you make him lean over to grab more cards from the deck.

The two Draw Two’s that Yoongi had had in his hands make him ache for some reason. It’s stupid, and it’s definitely not like Yoongi hasn’t faked losing before (mostly for Hoseok, who always complains about rigged cards if he doesn’t win at least once), and it’s just a kind gesture but it stings.

It prickles even more when Jimin leans down and kisses Yoongi on the cheek. “Thanks for letting me win,” he says with a smile, and Yoongi’s ears turn red amidst the sound of jeers. Jin turns away from the sight, and instead looks at Taehyung. Taehyung, who’s jaw is clenched as he rises from the floor and slides into the kitchen.

Oh, Jin thinks. 

He gives it a couple of minutes before he follows in pursuit, giving everyone a throw away excuse of grabbing more snacks before ducking into the kitchen. He finds Tae leaning against the fridge, eyes still on the scene in the living room, nursing a can of beer.

“Hyung,” he says, eyes stationary. Jin leans against the counter across from Tae and doesn’t hesitate when a question that he’s pretty sure he knows the answer to pops into his head.

“You like Jimin, don’t you?”

Tae splutters on his beer, and then looks up with puppy eyes. “Was it that obvious?”

“Obvious to someone who’s known you since you were three.” Jin swipes the can out of Tae’s hands. “And by the fact that you’re drinking when we all know you hate to.”

Taehyung snorts and opens the fridge to grab a beverage more like himself, a packaged orange juice. He stabs the straw through the box and starts sipping with a pout.

“Cheer up, baby,” Jin quietly murmurs.

Tae chuckles lightly, but it’s self-deprecating. “I wish I could. But knowing that I could have had him a month ago--” Tae stops abruptly, eyes locking onto Jin. “He told me he loved me, but we’d been friends for like forever, and I was sure that we weren’t meant for that, you know?”

“Hmm.”

“Then he started to go out with Yoongi, and he’s so--, and all I can think is that could’ve been me. He could be smiling because I did something stupid… that,” Tae hiccups, the fresh start of tears welling in his eyes, and Jin rushes to hold him.

“Sorry, it’s just that you were the first person I could say this too” Tae admits, tucked in the curve of Jin’s neck. Jin slowly pets Tae’s hair.

“It’s okay. I understand.”

“It’s cuz you like Yoongi too, right?”

Childhood friends could always read you better than anyone else. “Yeah.”

“I thought so…” Tae murmured.

The shouts of the party outside were rowdy enough to break the moment so Seokjin tried to wriggle his way out of the embrace but Tae was still wrapped around him like an anaconda.  

“Uh, Tae? How much longer are we going to hug each other?”

“Hyung, I am distraught and you’re just really warm. God, this is nice. Maybe I should move in with you…”

That was where Seokjin drew the line. He roughly pushed Tae off his body. “Absolutely not.”

Tae kept talking on as if he hadn’t heard him. “And we both have the same problems. You cook all the time too! This is paradise.” Tae uses both his hands to smush Jin’s cheeks. “Adopt me too.”

“No.”

“Don't you love me?”

“Not enough.”

“But I love you!”

“Yah, Taehyung-ah!” Tae and Jin whip around to find Jimin standing there, closely followed by Yoongi and Jungkook. Their eyes trail down from Tae’s hands, which are still cupping Jin’s cheeks down to where Jin is still holding Tae by the waist. Taehyung and Jin quickly spring apart, Jin leaning against the counter in a manner that he thinks is nonchalant, but Jimin’s slightly surprised look tells him maybe not.

“What’s up, Jimin-ah?” Tae manages to put out, and Jin thanks him for it so much.

“We’re just getting ready to leave. You ready?”

“Yup.” Tae turns to Jin. “Thanks for everything, hyung.” He tickles Jin under his chin.

Jin pats him on his nape. “I’m always here.”

By the time Jimin and the crew have left the house, he’s added another secret.

(Probably the worst one).

There’s been an uninvited guest at his kitchen island, always present at breakfast for the past three weeks and never being thankful about the food that Seokjin provides from the depths of his generous heart.

“What do you think about some kimchi jjigae, omurice, and freshly pressed orange juice this morning?”

Seokjin regrets thinking that this insatiable monster was ever cute.

“Does this look like a restaurant to you?” he questions the black hooded figure. Jungkook perks up from his phone and slides his round glasses up the bridge of his nose.

“Psh, you could have kicked me out anytime you wanted. Oh! And I like my jjigae spicy.” Jungkook gives him a thumbs-up before focusing back on his game.

Brat, Seokjin murderously thinks in his head, but turns to the fridge anyway, pulling out kimchi and eggs to make exactly what the Bunny Highness ordered, because he’s exactly right: Seokjin could have kicked him out a long time ago.

Jungkook’s asked for very easy dishes so it’s not long before the stew is bubbling away and the omurice is already plated. There’s no way in hell that he’s actually making orange juice and glares right back into Jungkook’s disappointed look when he slams a packaged one in front of him. The stare down doesn’t end until they both get distracted by Yoongi, who hurriedly walks out of the bedroom. He takes one look at Jungkook sitting at the island and swerves into the kitchen.

“Is there a reason,” he softly whispers, as he stands by Seokjin, who’s turned back to the stove now, “that the brat has been here every morning? I mean, his dorm’s extermination finished weeks ago.”

“He likes my food,” Jin shrugs, as he grabs three bowls from the cupboard to his right. Yoongi looks at him with a glance that looks almost pitiful.

“Hyung,” he says, and it’s in that tone of voice that’s been happening for the past three weeks so Seokjin’s still not sure why he keeps making this mistake.

“Oh, yes, you gotta go again. Right,” he says, as he puts the extra bowl away. “I’ll see you tonight then.” Seokjin forces a smile at Yoongi as he scoops rice into the bowls. (Secret ten? Eleven? It’s getting harder now).

Yoongi gives him a pitying look again; Seokjin just knows because its burns into his back, but he doesn't turn. He hears Yoongi tread out of the room and struggle with his coat. There’s a loud bang before the apartment’s silent.

“That was painful.”

Seokjin hits Jungkook with a glare, as he sets the steaming jjigae in between them. “Do you want to starve?”

“No…,” Jungkook says, as he opens the containers of side dishes that Jin had pulled out a while back, “But I feel the need to ask what’s wrong. I know I’ve only known you for about a month, but all the stories about you and Yoongi hyung just don’t add up right now.”

“Hobi exaggerates.”

“But Namjoon hyung doesn’t.” Jungkook counters, with a raised eyebrow. He pouts though, because Seokjin doesn’t humor him with a response. “Ah, come on, hyung. Why do you think I come out of the way every morning, as if I can’t eat at the dining hall? It’s cause Tae told me.”

Fucking Tae, Seokjin thinks but blithely answers Jungkook. “Then you know it’s all me.”

“No, shit.” Jungkook says in the driest voice possible, quickly shoving kimchi into his mouth after.

“What do you what me to do, huh?” Jin asks, body sagging. He’s tired; so tired of having to pretend in front of Yoongi that he’s fine, that he has nothing to hide, even though he has so many damn secrets from the person he wants to tell most. And Jungkook is sitting here making him feel like it’s all his fault.

Jungkook looks unflinchingly into Jin’s eyes. “I want you to get sorted. I want you to be you again, because Yoongi hyung’s noticed a long time ago that something is off.”

Jungkook leaves almost immediately after he’s done eating, even though Jin is sure that he still had another hour before he really had to leave to get to his class. Jin could tell by the way the he cleared all the dishes and weirdly offered to teach him some tricks on Overwatch that he felt like he had overstepped his bounds, and this was a Jungkook way of apologizing.

Seokjin wasn’t really upset, but it was nice to recline on the couch while Jungkook packed up leftovers into the fridge. A little nicer to get even more respect than usual (not that he actually wanted it). Definitely not nice though, to think over Jungkook’s words (especially when he was right).

How was Jin supposed to get sorted? How was he supposed to go back to himself? He couldn’t possibly tell Yoongi anything, but these secrets were quickly forming a rope that seemed to curl around his lungs and tighten, never to be slack until they were at least acknowledged.

Maybe that’s where I should start , Seokjin thinks. If these secrets were toiling so hard to be heard, then Seokjin will give them just that.

He vaults off the couch and hunts through the mess on the coffee table, eventually managing to discover a relatively clean piece of scratch paper and a blue colored pencil. He thinks about labelling the page for a second, and even though it sounds like something a fourth grader would write in his or her diary, he boldly scribbles, ‘Secrets’, at the top and he starts the list.

Thirteen secrets. That’s how much he’s written in the past five minutes. He’s scared that more will crawl out of his skin and make it onto the paper, but when he labels fourteen, his body feels wrung out and empty. This is all that he has to give and Seokjin throws into a book to forget about it.

(It’s a lie. He’s only written twelve, because if he writes the first one, then it’ll mean it’s all over. But this is enough for him to start acting normal again. For him and Yoongi to be normal again).

Jimin is feeding a Yoongi a ssam wrap.

A strong sense of familiarity hits Jin, as he remembers a night where it was just Yoongi and him, sitting at this same barbecue place with Jin trying to feed him a ssam wrap despite Yoongi’s vehement protests. Bromance, he thinks he said then. Now though, he realizes that there was nothing bromantic about how red Jin’s ears became and how he satisfied he felt when he saw Yoongi flush as well. In any case, a hand fed ssam wrap is definitely the opposite of bromantic. It’s completely romantic , which is what Jimin and Yoongi are being.

But this isn’t his concern anymore. He’s got his list of secrets written and hidden back at home, and he’s ready to move on. If Jimin and Yoongi decide to have sex on this here barbecue table, Jin would toss them a condom and walk away. If they got married, Jin’s sure he’d make a great groomsman. If they had kids, Jin likes to think that he’d be the first candidate for godfather.

(False confidence is the most important aspect of moving on. Jin’ll need it a lot of it, especially for his next move).

“Taehyung-ah,” Jin says, slowly nudging Tae off his shoulder.

“Hmm, hyung?”

“Remember that senior you told me about in your art history class last semester?” Jin asks as he places sliced tonkatsu onto his rice bowl, trying to soften him up. Tae takes the bait; Jin can tell by the way his eyes brighten.

“You mean Jaehwan hyung?” he asks as he chews happily.

“Yeah.” Jin gulps before asking his next question. “Uhh, do you think he’d still want to go out for a coffee sometime?”

Tae freezes in the midst of chewing. Namjoon spits out the soju he was drinking. Hobi’s eyes are finally off Kentaro, the waiter he’s been trying to bag all night, and are boring into him. Jin wants to shrivel like a grape in sunlight.

“Hyung, do you mean like a date?” Jungkook loudly asks, and that’s practically enough to catch the attention of entire restaurant.

“Well,” Jin starts quietly, repeatedly running his chopsticks through his rice bowl, “I just want to meet new people, that’s all.”

“Which is what dating is.” Hobi says seriously, nodding his head at every word, as if he’s trying to make Jin see sense. Jin ignores him and instead sneaks a glance at Yoongi… who’s staring right back at him, lips biting on a pair of chopsticks. Jin quickly looks away.

“Wait just a minute…” Jimin says, looking supremely confused. He points his chopsticks at Tae and Jin, “I thought Tae and you…” Jimin stops when Yoongi shoves him with his elbow.

The second that Jin figures out what Jimin is implying, he jerks back in disgust. “No! Oh my god, he’s like my son!”

“That’s incest, Jiminie!” Tae shouts.

“I’m sorry! But you like, cuddle!”

“I cuddle with everyone !” Tae screams, and then leans back on Jin. “Oh, the humanity,” he sighs.

Jin tries to ignore the fact that Jimin really thought he and Tae were together and gets back to his original question. “So. Jaehwan. You think he’ll want to?”

“Who wouldn’t, hyung?” Tae catches his eye and keeps going. “But, yeah, I think he will.”

“That’s nice.” Jin says and pops grilled meat into his mouth so that he doesn’t have to say anything anymore.

The shock of Jin’s question quickly dissipates as more dishes arrive to their table, courtesy of Kentaro. As everyone starts gulping down food and making fun of how Hobi froze when Kentaro came by, Namjoon sidles up to him.

Jin takes one look at his face. “What? Did Tae tell everyone?” he whisper-shouts.

Namjoon shakes his head and taps his temple with two fingers. “I’m people-smart, hyung.”

Jin only raises an eyebrow. “Really? So does that mean you’ll finally believe what I’ve been trying to tell you about Jung—"

“Don’t change the subject!” Namjoon interrupts, the tips of his ears turning pink. “Tell me about Jaehwan.”

“It’s not a date. I really just want to make a new friend.”

“But why?”

Jin sighs and places his chopsticks on the table before staring Namjoon in the eye. “You want to know why, Joonie? Because it feels like I can’t breathe among all of you. You’d think after three of your friends figure out your number one secret, you can relax, but instead I feel like I’m still ten feet underground.”

“Because you can’t tell Yoongi.”

“Because I can’t tell Yoongi, so I have to act like I’m fine for you all, and I’m really working on it but—” Jin stops for a second. “I’m not quite there yet, so I just need someone who doesn’t know me.” He returns to the food in front of him, expertly picking up stir fried bean sprouts and crunching on them, but he can still feel Namjoon’s eyes scanning him critically.

“He likes dad jokes.” Namjoon finally says, sliding a soju bottle down to Jin.

“What?”

“Jaehwan. He likes dad jokes. I heard Hakyeon telling him one the other day and he was laughing for ages. Regardless, he has a shitty sense of humor, which works in your favor.”

Seokjin looks up with a smile. “Thanks, Namjoon-ah.”

“Anytime, hyung,” Namjoon says, clapping his back, “Anytime.”

The night quickly comes to an end when a completely wasted Jungkook starts singing praises about Namjoon’s thighs, making the elder start to splutter. Seokjin only tosses a knowing look at Joonie before tottering over to Taehyung, who’s currently holding the maknae up.

“You sure you can get him home?” he manages to say in a complete sentence. Seokjin mentally pats himself on the back, before remembering to listen to Tae’s response.

“—not too far. We should be good.” Tae peers closer at him and takes a whiff before shrinking back. “Hyung, you even smell drunk. Who’s gonna take you home?”

Seokjin feels his mouth open but doesn’t quite remember what he said to Tae, or even how he’s suddenly sitting on a bus stop bench with Yoongi bending over to peer at him through boxy glasses.

“Do you even recognize me, hyung?”

Seokjin thinks to roll his eyes; he only hopes his muscles have followed through instead of making him look like he was having a spasm. “Of course, I do; it’s Yoongichi!”

“Ah, hyung,” Yoongi is looking around him self-consciously, but Seokjin is still staring straight at him. “People are laughing at me.”

“It’s a cute name for a cute person. They’re upset they don’t have one.” Yoongi turns away, hand scratching at the back of his head, when Seokjin notices something dire. He quickly stretches his arms to cup Yoongi’s cheeks.

“Yoongi, you’re red.”

“I am not. I’m not blushi--”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were cold? Let’s take a taxi tonight. Hyung’s treat.” He stands too quickly and immediately stumbles, but Yoongi is already holding him up already, grumbling.

“How are you even going to stay awake long enough to pay?” he asks but leads him to the edge of the sidewalk anyway and puts out his arm to hail a cab.

Yoongi’s right. Seokjin doesn’t even remember getting into the cab, much less riding in it. He doesn’t remember climbing the three flights of stairs to their apartment, getting into his bedroom, or even making it to his bed.

He does remember Yoongi whispering something to him. Or maybe he was just talking to the cab driver.

The slam of a door swiftly rouses Seokjin out of his slumber and straight into feeling his hangover. He softly groans and peeks through his eyelids to hunt down his phone for the time. 8:15. Why the fuck is Yoongi making noise at 8:15 in the goddamn morning? When has Yoongi even willingly been awake at 8:15 in the morning?

The pulsing headache that Seokjin’s currently experiencing right now makes him quickly put that mystery aside and set out on a new quest: to get some Advil and any food. He rises from his covers only to quickly sink back in surprise. These were not the clothes that he was wearing last night. Someone’s changed him. He looks around the room and notices something new on his nightstand. A bottle of pills and a glass of water that has one of his own heart post-its stuck to it.

There’s breakfast in the kitchen. – Yoongi

Yoongi changed his clothes? Left him a bottle of Advil? Made him breakfast? Seokjin tightly pinches the skin on his forearm and experiences an accompanying tinge of pain, so no, this is not a dream, but this is not necessarily a good thing either.

What the fuck did he do last night?

Yoongi’s never painstakingly taken care of him before, except once when Seokjin got food poisoning from undercooked meat that Yoongi had confidently served to him. Seokjin understood later that it was an apology, and that he was never going to see Yoongi so visibly caring until he fucked up again.

Maybe Seokjin’s asking the wrong question. What the fuck did Yoongi do last night?

Seokjin’s thoughts are quickly interrupted when he gets a quick whiff of himself. A shower; a shower will the first order of business. A shower and apparently Yoongi’s breakfast. And then he can think.

By the time he’s out of the bathroom, he’s more or less feeling like a human again than a blob with minimal consciousness. This means that he finally notices the strong smell of beef wafting through his apartment. Jin strides to the kitchen table and opens the stew bowl to confirm his suspicions. Yup, Yoongi’s made him hangover soup and with fresh side dishes. There’s even rice kept warm for him in a rice cooker.

Jin tries not to think anything of it. There’s been countless times where he’s made something for Yoongi. It’s really not anything special when it’s the other way around.

He pulls out his phone to try to distract his mind, but instead sees a text from Taehyung.

Jaehwan hyung says ok. Tomorrow at 7 good for you?

Seokjin looks up from his phone and roves over the feast laid out on the table. Then, he types yes.

Seokjin’s only ever seen Jaehwan from afar so when he plops down in the booth, his first thought is this: an overgrown Golden retriever is sitting in front of him and Seokjin just wants to cuddle.

Jaehwan’s eyes though, immediately narrow, pinning Seokjin to his seat. “Why now?” he asks, curiously.

No Golden retriever would take anyone down with two words. He’s sitting in front of a vulture.

“We haven’t even greeted each other.” Seokjin huffs.

“Fine.” Jaehwan clears his throat. “Hello, I am Lee Jaehwan, fourth year at Konkuk University. And you?”

Seokjin scrunches his nose. “Now I know how you and Tae became friends; same sense of sarcasm.” Jaehwan only raises his eyebrows and Seokjin rolls his eyes.

“Kim Seokjin. Fourth year, Konkuk University. And why not now?”

“It’s a secret huh? Well, if you don’t want to tell me…” Jaehwan starts to rise.

“Fine, fine.” Seokjin sighs and looks everywhere except at Jaehwan. “I just… I needed a friend.”

“Tae’s a pretty good friend if you ask me.”

“All my friends are good friends,” Seokjin emphatically says. “They just can’t help me with this one specific problem.”

“Which is?” Jaehwan asks, leaning forward.

Seokjin sighs, and then he really looks at Jaehwan, wondering if he should really lose his dignity to this stranger about his love life. Then, he realizes that he hasn’t had any dignity since last year when he willingly put on a playboy bunny costume for Halloween and pole danced to Friday by Rebecca Black. (The kicker? He wasn’t even drunk).

“It’s not just one secret: it’s thirteen.” Seokjin looks Jaehwan in the eye to see if he’ll react in any way, but the fucker only leans back into his seat with the smug grin of a man who had gotten what he had wanted.

“Let’s hear it.”

Seokjin starts and goes on for about an hour and a half. These secrets shouldn’t take this long, but Seokjin’s the type of person who thinks multiple tangents are completely necessary for context before he delves into the real problem, which means every secret gets its own spotlight. Jaehwan’s a very patient listener, humming in agreement in all the right places and hitting Seokjin’s shoulder whenever he thinks that Seokjin’s done something mental. (He even forces Seokjin to sit beside him, only because it was getting to tiring to reach over the table apparently).

“You know, I think you’ve really got one thing wrong,” Jaehwan says, scraping the last of their third bowl of patbingsu and shoving it into his mouth. Seokjin’s not mad though; he’s already put in an order for a fourth one.

“And what’s that?”

“You didn’t need a friend.” Jaehwan bobs a spoon down in the air at every word. “That whole spiel about not being able to tell Tae and the others? Bullshit. You’re just embarrassed that they all caught on before you.”

“Caught on?”

“Why else would they call you and Yoongi mom and dad? Because they had a kink?”

Jin scrunches his nose and shoves Jaehwan’s shoulder. “That’s not true.”

“Seriously though. Do you really think any one of them would have thought any less of you for having these secrets?”

Jin thinks for a moment, even though the answer is ready to fall from his lips . “They wouldn’t.”

“Exactly. But I’m glad that you were embarrassed.”

“Why?” Jin asks, as the waitress who’d been serving them all night came to serve patbingsu, this time strawberry.

“Cuz you’re a good person. I like you and your chaotic ways. You and my boyfriend would love each other.”

Seokjin almost drops the spoon he just picked up. “You have a boyfriend? Then why did you even agree to the date?”

“I was curious. I asked you out like five months ago. Wouldn’t you want to know if you were in my shoes?”

Seokjin leans back against his wall of the seat again. “I guess…” he slowly drawls but perks up. “Tell me about...”

“Sandeul,” Jaehwan fills in. A fond smile blooms on his face, making Seokjin’s heart warm. “Well, he’s an idiot.”

When Seokjin gets home that night, he doesn’t expect Yoongi to be there, awake and swaddled in a blanket as he squints at his laptop screen.

“I thought you’d be in the studio tonight.” Seokjin says, as he hangs his coat in the closet. “What gives?”

“The fact that I have not done any of my Sociology quizzes online.”

“And they’re due?”

“In the morning.”

Seokjin glances at the clock. It’s only ten, which means that he could just ignore this, catch the latest episode of Secretary Kim , and then head to bed. He looks toward his bedroom, the TV, and then back at Yoongi, who’s now vigorously flipping through a textbook.

“Give me,” he says, as he plops into the dining table chair next to him and grabs the book out of his hands. “I took Socio last semester, so maybe I can help.”

“But...Secretary Kim—”

Seokjin looks up with a scowl. “Don’t remind me.”

Yoongi seals his mouth and shifts the laptop screen towards him so that he can read the questions. It takes them about four hours to finish, including a dinner break that occurred when Seokjin found out that Yoongi hadn’t eaten anything all day to finish those quizzes.

“Thanks, hyung,” Yoongi repeats one more time, as they sit side by side on the couch, sipping beer and watching a home shopping network that’s currently trying to sell a ramyun cooker.

“Pay me back by buying me food.”

“Sure. By the way, how did your date with Jaehwan go?”

Seokjin turns sharply to Yoongi. “It wasn’t a date.”

“Fine. How did your not-a-date with Jaehwan go?”

“Our ‘coffee appointment’ went just fine. You know, he laughed at every one of my dad jokes? He’s #1 best friend right now.”

Yoongi turns to him with betrayed eyes. “But I’m always #1 best friend.”

“But do you laugh at my jokes?”

Yoongi feigns interest back at the ramyun cooker infomercial and Seokjin’s almost forgot that he’s asked the question, when he hears a quiet ‘Always’ emit from Yoongi. He turns to look at him, but Yoongi looks the same, and Seokjin’s left to wonder if he’s even started to hallucinate now.

The beers are empty and both of them are getting ready for bed when Yoongi speaks again.

“You seem different, hyung.” Yoongi says, stopping Seokjin at his bedroom door.

“Different?”

“You know how it feels when you go to pee after holding it in for a long time? That’s what I mean.”

“Yah, why can’t you just say, ‘less stressed’ or something? Why do you have to say it like that?”

“Whatever,” Yoongi shrugs, turning away to his room. “Night.”

Seokjin thinks on those words even after he’s tucked under the covers for the night. Just as his eyes shut for sleep, his brain reminds him of something.

The secrets. They haven’t been shouting to be heard when he was with Yoongi tonight. Seokjin doesn’t even feel their tight hold on his heart and mind, more like they’re all written on a small post it as a reminder and pinned on his brain’s noticeboard.

Huh, Seokjin thinks, Jaehwan’s working miracles.

He grins.

Of course, all of Seokjin’s progress with Jaehwan goes down the drain almost immediately.

It starts, deceivingly enough, with a phone call.

“A what?” Seokjin asks into the phone, mostly because he’s not sure if he’s heard right.

“Jimin wants to hold a one-month anniversary party for me and him,” Yoongi listlessly repeats, over the sound of someone shuffling in the background. He’s outside somewhere… the bus, is Seokjin’s best guess.

“Isn’t that like… a personal thing between you two?” Seokjin tries.

“Well, he’s happy to have met all of us, so it’s a celebration of both, I guess. You can bring anyone you want.”

“When is it?”

“Tomorrow night.”

“A day’s notice?”

“It’s not like we have lives.”

“Fair enough. Why didn’t you just tell me when you got home?”

“…Sorry, hyung, I’ll be in the studio all night.” Seokjin ignores the sting.

“That’s fine. Remember to eat please.”

“Okay.”

“See you tomorrow.” Seokjin hangs up and looks down blurrily at the psych textbook below him.

A one-month anniversary party? People really celebrate everything these days. Funny, though, because he didn’t peg Jimin to be the type, more Taehyung or Hoseok.

Well, it wasn’t like he was going to say no to free alcohol.

“Why are you two so nervous?” Jin asks Jaehwan and Sandeul.

“Cuz we’re about to meet your friends. And the love of your life. It’s an important moment for us.”

“You’re acting like we’re poly.” Jin says, as he knocks on Jimin and Tae’s door. Hopefully, someone can hear him over the thumping bass music.

Sandeul smirks as he drapes an arm on Seokjin’s shoulder and shoots him a salacious grin. “Not yet. But I can make it happen.”

Jin roughly pushes him off his shoulder. “Sorry, Sandeul-ah, but you’re too kinky for me.”

“Hey! Don’t knock em till you try them!”

The door swings open before Seokjin can respond, revealing Jimin, clad in a transparent shirt that exposed his dancer’s body more than it covered up. His face is full of makeup, and damn his eyes are still sparkling with glitter shadow despite the sweat. Where can Seokjin get some quality makeup like that?

“Jinnie hyung!”

“Ah, Jimin-ah!”

“And this is?” Jimin asks. Seokjin looks back to see Jaehwan and Sandeul looking slack jawed and throws out his leg to kick Jaehwan’s right shin.

“Ow! I mean, oh, I’m Jaehwan.”

“And I’m Sandeul.”

“And we’re definitely gay and ready to poly.”

“Party! He means party.”

Jimin nods slowly, grin a little strained. “Ok, well, hi. Um, come on in hyungs; let’s get you drunk!”

The apartment is filled to the brim with people all grinding on each other either accidentally or on purpose. Seokjin can’t see right or left, just up where the ceiling’s a mess of colored lights, and down, where the floor is filled with feet, crushed red solo cups, and, interestingly, Rice Krispies wrappers.

“The gang’s taken over the coffee table. Least amount of bodily fluids.” Jimin yells as he navigates them. Jin’s mildly disgusted at that statement.

Surely enough, the group’s all there. Tae’s sitting on an ottoman with a beautiful of face of makeup on, just like Jimin. He’s deep in conversation with Kentaro, who’s perched on Hoseok’s lap. Next to Hoseok are Namjoon and Kookie, both talking to each other without even looking into each other’s eyes. (Something happened there, Seokjin just knows it). Yoongi’s just watching the scene with a bottle of beer loosely clasped in his hand, but his eyes widen as he takes them in.

Seokjin catches Hoseok’s eyes first and wiggles his eyebrows at Kentaro. Nice job, he mouths. Hobi just flips him off.

“Hyung! Come sit here, introduce us to your friends.” Jungkook shouts, practically jumping out of his seat. Namjoon’s body deflates at the words. Pushing his curiosity down, he goes along with Jungkook’s antics and pushes Sandeul and Jaehwan to Namjoon and pulls Jungkook onto his own lap.

“You wanna let me know what that was about?” he whispers.

“Just as soon as you confess to Yoongi.” The brat replies. Seokjin bumps him with his chin but still wraps his hands around Jungkook’s waist, securing him.

Hoseok leans forward in interest towards Seokjin. “So, it really is some kind of polyamory thing, huh?” he asks.

“NO! Oh my god, they’re both just friends.”

Sandeul lets out a distressed cry and flings himself onto Jaehwan. “How could he throw our love away that quickly?”

Seokjin throws him a disgusted look. “Shut up and get me some vodka.”

“Here, hyung, me and Yoongi hyung will get you all something.” Jimin pulls Yoongi off the ratty couch cushion and they start to maneuver through the dance floor.

As soon as the two are out of sight, Seokjin’s shoulder is punched so hard by Sandeul and Jaehwan, that he almost drops Jungkook. He turns to the side to shoot them both a glare.

“Can you two stop being so fucking obvious?”

“But that’s the one!” Jaehwan whines.

“I didn’t think he’d be that short. Did you think he’d be that short?”

“I didn’t think he’d be that…’glarey’.”

“That might be the glasses. He usually doesn’t wear those,” Jungkook offers.

“You think?” Sandeul asks with interest, while Jaehwan decides to move on to another issue.

“You know, I can’t decide who’d top.”

“Is this really your main concern?” Seokjin grits out.

“Of course not.” Jungkook bites into a Rice Krispie he’s mysteriously procured before he continues. “Riling you up is our main concern.”

“Interesting, though. Jimin’s dating him, right? Why still call him hyung?”

“It’s a kink.” Sandeul proclaims, and before Seokjin can find an adequate weapon to hit Sandeul with because even with the party going around on them he was sure that people outside could still hear him, Yoongi and Jimin have arrived, arms laden with alcohol.

“What’s a kink?” Jimin asks, and Seokjin shoots a murderous glare at Sandeul while subtly tilting his head toward Jimin so that the fucker realizes he’s gotta get them out of this mess.

“Well—anything can really be a kink, right? Like um, butter?”

“Butter?” Yoongi repeats, disgusted.

Sandeul’s face hardens. “Don’t kink shame.”

“Sorry,” Jaehwan says to Yoongi, as he pats Sandeul’s thigh, trying to calm him down. “He’s a big protector on kinks.”

Yoongi only raises his beer bottle. “To each their own.”

“Are you all just going to just sit around and talk? Not even dance once?” Jimin asks pouting.

The group looks at each other, then quickly averts their eyes.

“Fine. Let me put it that this way. Either I take the alcohol off your hands, or you dance.”

Tae’s finally broken away from Kentaro and grins at Jimin. “But I don’t like alcohol.”

“You think I don’t know? That’s why I’ll be taking away a week of hot chocolate. Now gather around, humans! We’re gonna dance whether you like it or not.”

Jimin, who is somehow freakishly strong despite his height, manages to pull all of them, even Namjoon, onto the makeshift dance floor. It helps that Sandeul and Jaehwan were also in complete agreement with him, so the task is swiftly achieved.

Jin shoots a glare at Sandeul, who was the one to drag him onto the floor, and if that wasn’t enough, to push him hard towards Yoongi like that was going to help matters.

“I’m gonna kill you later,” he manages to whisper in his ear.

Sandeul only grins and shouts back. “I was just being an excellent wing man! Now, dance , Jin-ah.”

Seokjin’s definitely not one to dance, mostly because he thinks that aggressively flapping his arms doesn’t count in any sub category of it. But maybe because it’s been weeks of stressful events from Yoongi to classes, and so when he catches the sound of something that sounds suspiciously like a TWICE song remixed with a beat that’s just about to drop, he just lets loose.

“Yeah, hyung!” he hears Jungkook cheer, but all Seokjin’s really doing is jumping in the throng of people, but that’s what everyone else is doing, and they’re not looking at him like he’s an idiot, so maybe he’s doing something right.

It’s miraculous how freeing it is, even though he’s surrounded by so many people. If this were a crowd in a lecture hall that he was about to TA, they would be intimidating. But right now, they’ve all become this one entity that’s either drunk on alcohol, music, or both.

And Seokjin loves it. He doesn’t think about the term paper that he has due in a week, his exams two weeks after, or Yoongi and Jimin. He just drinks in the atmosphere, till the sweat trickles off him enough to break the spell he’s under.

With a ‘One sec.’ towards Jaehwan, who’s closest to him, Seokjin makes his way to the kitchen to grab any cold drink. Of course, Tae and Jimin don’t have any in the fridge, but there is a huge bucket of ice so all that’s needed is a bottle of vodka.

Jin thinks for a moment, cuz like every other smart college student, Jimin’s probably hid the good alcohol in preparation for this party. His eyes catch on a tiny corner where he can see the edge of a golden doorknob. The pantry! He moves to it.

Except Jimin’s there. And Yoongi. And there’s moaning, oh my god.

Seokjin flips away quickly and tries to think of a way to gouge his eyes out but suddenly, stops in his tracks.

Since when did Yoongi have a mullet?

Seokjin peeks over the wall again to see Tae, eyes half lidded in pleasure, as Jimin presses wet kisses up his neck.

Holy fuck.

South Korea should be given an award for how easy it is to find a bottle of soju even in the inky depths of night.

Seokjin’s sitting at a tent bar, probably a couple of blocks away from Jimin and Tae’s place. Three empty bottles of soju (all a different flavor because Seokjin was feeling whimsical) stand by the left hand that’s propping him up while his right hand is pouring more into a shot glass, because it’s just not working. He can’t stop thinking.

The right thing to do would be to tell Yoongi what he just saw, but Yoongi’s been so… happy. His scowl rarely makes an appearance these days, even at home, and the only change has been Jimin. Would Yoongi be okay if Seokjin tells him what he saw? Would he start to hate him?

(There’s also another side of him. A dark side led by the secrets, that can’t help but think that now Jimin and Yoongi could break up. This is the side he’s trying to numb with alcohol).

Seokjin sighs as he goes to refill the soju glass, but then realizes that it’s useless and just gulps from the bottle.

The bottle is suddenly plucked from his hands and slammed on the table in front of him, soju jumping out the top.

“What is the point of you having a goddamn phone if you won’t fucking pick it up?” a voice threateningly growls. Seokjin doesn’t even register how angry the person sounds, instead reaching for the bottle that this stranger has pulled away from him.

“That’s mine,” he pouts. The stranger only grunts and ends up sitting across Seokjin and draining the (His!) bottle.

“Aghh, what fucking flavor was that?”

“You know, my friend Yoongi curses like that.”

The stranger levels him with a glare. “Oh really?”

“Yeah.” Seokjin peers closer. “He even has white hair like you.”

“Hyung, you’ve got to be kidding me right now.”

“He calls me hyung too! Wait, let me see you smile.”

“Smile?”

“No one smiles like Yoongi smiles. It’s so gummy.” Seokjin lifts his fingers to his lips and pulls them out into a smile, one that he thinks looks like Yoongi’s. Maybe not though, as the stranger quickly tries to hide a smirk that obviously, rebelliously passed through his defenses.

“Ah, Yoongi-yah. It’s really you.” He grins, but it quickly falls, as he remembers Yoongi’s theft. “Give me my soju back.”

Yoongi sighs and calls out for the ahjumma to get him normal soju and doesn’t turn back until she delivers it. With a quick twist of his wrist, the cap is off and Yoongi fills Seokjin’s glass.

“So,” he starts, when he starts to fill his own, “why did you run out of that party?”

Of course, Yoongi gets straight to the point. Seokjin can’t tell him the truth, not quite yet. Secret 14’s now been added to the roster.

“Too loud.”

“Not cause Jaehwan and Sandeul left to make out without you?”

“We’re not dating! Fuck, that’s not why.”

“Then why?” Yoongi pouts.

Seokjin’s not sure if Yoongi’s aware of it, but Yoongi’s pout always manages to make him weak because his eyes narrow into slits while his mouth bunches up in an inverse ‘U’ and somehow, both of them work together to fish an answer right out of you. Seokjin’s tried doing it in the mirror; he only ended up looking like a constipated goat.

It won’t work this time, because this time, the truth is not easy to say.

“Did you know Yoongi, that everyone there had someone else? Hobi and Kentaro, Sandeul and Jaehwan… I felt alone.” He doesn’t meet Yoongi’s eyes, rather stares at his fingers that are curled around a miniscule shot glass.

“Hyung, they’re all still your friends.”

Seokjin tsks. “Of course they are. But I was... jealous.” There, this was a safe answer. Kinda true answer. “You know, is like there’s phoramones—

“Pheromones.”

“Pheromones in the air or something. I mean, even you’re dating!”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Yoongi tilts his head, frowning.

Fuck. Seokjin widens his eyes. “Is just…you’re like an ocean, Yoongichi.” He says, voice full of sincerity.

“You’re drunk.”

“Really! You know everything you say is so deep, and you’re terrifying!”

“Hyung, don’t tell me you’re afraid of the ocean.”

“It is vast, Yoongi. There’s literally no telling that we have discovered everything in it.” Seokjin pauses, and shudders. “Sting rays, ugh.”

Yoongi sighs as he slides his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “So, I’m terrifying is what you’re trying to say?”

“Nope. Kittens aren’t scary.”

“You literally just called me an ocean.”

“You can be two things. You have two names. Two arms. Two leg—”

Yoongi throws him a sharp look. Don’t do it, is clearly what he’s saying.

Seokjin can’t stop himself. He lets it slip quietly between his lips. “Two balls.”

Yoongi throws his hands up into the air. “I warned you—”

“I’m sorry.”

“If you’re really sorry, you can stop drinking so we can go home.”

“But Jimin? His party?”

“They’ll understand. Actually…,” Yoongi takes out his phone and snaps a picture with a flash so bright, Jin sees spots for what seems like ages. “Now, they’ll even believe us.” Yoongi stares at the screen a little longer. “Hyung, you may want to stop calling yourself Worldwide Handsome.”

“Yah,” Seokjin rises from his seat and towers over Yoongi, staring him in the eye. “I’ll always be Worldwide Hand…”. Seokjin pauses as he feels a weird, tingly sensation travel up his esophagus. “And I think I’m about to puke.”

The frozen Yoongi immediately stands, coming around the table to grab Seokjin’s shoulders. “Ok, ok, hold it in, I swear to god, if anything gets on my pants, I’m going to shave all your hair. Is that clear?”

Seokjin nods obediently as Yoongi rummages through bills in his wallet and throws a few on the table. He grabs Seokjin by the arm and steers him out of the tent and into the streets.

“Still with me?”

“Why iz the world spinning?”

“Guess not then.” Seokjin feels Yoongi grab him by the side and sit him down a bench…no, a bus stop, before he steps away to look down the road.

“Yoongi…Yoongi-yahhh.”

“What, hyung? What is it?”

Seokjin pouts and keeps silent because he wants Yoongi to turn around and see him upset, and therefore feel bad about the way he has treated his own hyung.

Like planned, Yoongi turns back to him because he hasn’t answered and sighs. He walks over and kneels on the slightly damp road, only to clasp Seokjin’s hands and look him in the eye.

“I’m sorry hyung; what do you need?”

I need you to break up with Jimin.

I need to tell you the truth.

I need to forget you.

“Tigers are even stronger in water. So, who would win if tigers come in and fight with sharks?”

Yoongi takes a beat, letting his eyes sink, before looking up to Seokjin. Seokjin prepares himself for a stream of curses or a slap on the shoulder, or if he was lucky, an actual answer.

“Yah hyung, of course the tiger would win; they have claws.” Yoongi gets up and brushes his knees off and turns to the road. “Up we go hyung; the bus is here.”

It’s the same bus. With the same bus driver. The same large rip with stuffing pouring out on the seat in the front row.

Seokjin wants to laugh at it but realizes that this is sort of poetic. To throw away his feelings (or at least make the decision to) on the same bus that Seokjin realized them.

Because Yoongi said that the tiger would win. The shark that had always been there would lose.

Seokjin slowly leans his head on Yoongi’s shoulder, knowing very well that this would be the last time he would allow himself to do so.

“Yoongi-yah.” He whispers.

“Yes, hyung?”

“I’m sorry.”

Seokjin feels Yoongi shift, head turning to him now instead of the city lights that are passing by.

“You have nothing to be sorry for?”

“I saw Jimin and Tae kissing.” He blurts. Immediately, he feels Yoongi stiffen and pops off his shoulder to look Yoongi in the eye.

Expressionless like he usually is. But Seokjin can see the slight tightening of his mouth, the way his hands are curled into fists. Seokjin puts his hand on Yoongi’s shoulder.

“Are you ok?”

“I’m fine.” Yoongi looks out the window.

“But—”

“If you don’t mind, I don’t want to talk about it hyung. Not until I talk to Jimin.” Yoongi’s foot is shaking. Seokjin can see his eyes darting around through the reflection of the window.

“I understand.” Seokjin replies. He leans back on the seat and closes his eyes.

Until he feels a pull on his right sleeve making him fall right back onto Yoongi’s shoulders. Jin’s eyes fly right open.

“Thank you for telling me, hyung.”

Jin studiously avoids looking at Yoongi. “Aren’t you mad at Jimin?...At me?” he whispers softly.

“Why would I be mad at you? If anything, I’m glad you told me right away.”

“Even though you might break up with Jimin?”

Yoongi sighs. “Don’t you think I deserve a man who doesn’t cheat?”

You deserve everything.

“Of course you do.”

“Thank you.”

The hum of the bus keeps them company until Yoongi speaks again.

“Is that why you ran out of the party?”

Seokjin’s silent. Yoongi sighs.

“Running away from your problems again, hyung?” Seokjin doesn’t even have to look; he already knows how resigned Yoongi is.

“It’s what I do best.”

Yoongi doesn’t tell him anything, but Seokjin knows that it’s not going well.

Every time Yoongi steps through the door, his eyes are distant, unseeing. Like he’s frustrated. No, more like he’s stuck, which doesn’t seem right, but Seokjin ignores it in favor of trying to get Yoongi out of his funk.

Movies, subjecting Yoongi to his horrendous guitar skills, screwing up dinner so that Yoongi can salvage it. He takes the little smirk that graces Yoongi’s features as a victory, but his heart drops when he sees it fall.

Today, Yoongi walks in the afternoon itself looking glum. Seokjin internally curses whoever’s done this to him (read: Jimin) and leaps off the couch to catch Yoongi before he retreats into his room.

“Yoongi-yah!”

Yoongi stops and turns around.

“I’ve been waiting for you all afternoon. I need your help.”

“What for hyung?” Yoongi grunts.

Seokjin heaves up the Psych textbook he’s holding. “My final’s in an hour. Quiz me?” When Yoongi looks like he might adamantly refuse, Seokjin makes sure to look away and pointedly whisper, “Socio.”

Yoongi lets out a deep sigh, drops his backpack at the front of the door and plops himself on the couch. He stretches out a hand and Seokjin obediently hands him the textbook.

“Alright, hyung…” Yoongi pages through the book until his eyes are caught on something that Seokjin bets he doesn’t know anything about. “What are Piaget’s stages of development?”

It goes on like that for a little bit. Seokjin answering with complete bullshit, Yoongi giving him a dirty glare everytime he does so. It morphs into a particularly disgusted look though, when Yoongi learns about Sigmund Freud’s Oedipus Complex.

(“Come on, Yoongi. Literally people who’ve never taken a psych class know about this.”

“People know this exists and think it’s real? What has the world come too? Ugh, I’m gonna puke.”)

“Ok, ok, last question,” Seokjin says, as he rises from the couch and goes off to hunt for his backpack.

“Alright, what did Erikson think about personality development?”

Seokjin scours his brain for an answer. “Umm…, He’s the one with like 8 stages, right?” He hears pages rustle as he shoves his laptop into his bag and then an answer.

“Yup.”

“Then he was the one that thought personality developed over a lifetime.” Seokjin proclaims and waits for Yoongi to confirm his genius.

He doesn’t. Seokjin’s already walking out of the room, a whine ready on his lips.

“I was fucking sure I had that one—”.

Yoongi’s standing, eyes fixed on a stained scratch paper. Seokjin’s just about call him out for acting weird when he notices the writing. The blue colored pencil writing .

Fuck. Shit. Fuck. Goddamn it all to fucking he--.

“Hyung.” Yoongi says, eyes darting across the paper. “What the fuck is this?”

“It’s not—I mean, Yoongi, I can explain.”

Yoongi fixes him with concerned eyes. “Then do it.”

“But…my final, I—”

“Go. We’ll talk later.” Yoongi sits back, eyes darting around the room.

Seokjin walks out the door.

Seokjin’s stuck with a professor that doesn’t let the class go until everyone has completed the exam, so as soon as he’s done, he starts up a game plan. A hazy script forms in his head. ‘ You know, I don’t actually own the psych textbook; it was handed down to me from my senior, and then his own senior. Do you think every scrap paper in a textbook is mine? It was probably Jinki hyung’s; remember how whipped he was for Kibum hyung?’

By the time the professor lets them go, Seokjin’s about 90% ready with his defense plan. The bus ride home will give him enough time--

Seokjin’s left arm is tugged hard, spinning him around.

“Yoongi?” he asks, totally shocked.

“Let’s go, hyung.” Yoongi announces, dragging him determinedly down the hall.

Seokjin can feel the bricks of his plan crumbling. “Were you-- were you waiting here?”

“I was going crazy at home.” Yoongi pulls him into the band room, and upon spotting a couple of students laughing as they placed mismatched scales on the piano, quickly pulls him into a hidden practice room.

“Why were you going crazy?” Seokjin jumps as the door slams behind him but the fact that Yoongi’s pacing in front of him distracts him immediately.

Yoongi scoffs. “Why, he asks. This, of course!” Yoongi throws the list onto a music stand, and Seokjin doesn’t even look at it.

“It’s no--”

“It’s your handwriting, hyung. Look, just tell me…” Yoongi stops right in front of Seokjin, eyes wide and peering into his goddamn soul, it felt like. “What’s number one?”

Seokjin can’t think. Yoongi’s too close, the room seems like it's shrinking in on him, and oh, the secrets plow through his wall of a defense plan.  

“What were you going to write?”

“That I loved you.”

Seokjin isn’t given a second, not even one second to realize that he’s just confessed , because the next thing he knows, Yoongi is on his body, lips crashing into his own.

It’s unlike any kiss that Seokjin’s ever had before, maybe because Seokjin’s never felt such a spectrum of emotion for one person before. The love that he’s held for Yoongi all this time, the guilt of having to pretend he had no secrets from him, the anger of not realizing how much he loved this man before Jimin had snatched him up.

Oh, fuck. Jimin.

Seokjin pulls away immediately. “What. The fuck are you doing?”

Yoongi’s blinking back at him owlishly. “Isn’t this what you--”

“You have a boyfriend , Min Yoongi. Did you forget?”

The air of dominance that Yoongi had possessed when he marched Seokjin into the practice room dissipates immediately. Yoongi’s hand immediately rises, rubbing the back of his head. “Ahh, about that hyung, … Jimin’s not exactly my boyfriend..”

Seokjin’s quite aware that Yoongi’s still explaining whatever the circumstances were for him to be… pretend dating? Jimin. Something about Taehyung, his studio, but the relief, the glorious joy that sweeps through his body is making it a little hard to really follow through with the story. That joy, and the tinge of annoyance that swells the more that he thinks about what Yoongi has done.

He folds his arms and stares at Yoongi impassively, until the younger comes to a stuttering halt.

“Ah, hyung,” Yoongi reaches out an arm to touch his shoulder. “Did I lose--”

Yoongi cuts short, keening over and  gasping in pain. Why? Because Seokjin’s stomped on his foot.

“Yah, Min Yoongi! Didn’t we say not to keep any secrets from each other? What was so important that you had to keep this from me?”

“Weren’t you listening to anything I said?” Yoongi fires back, still slightly bent in pain. “Plus…” he looks around wildly before spotting the list that was laying forgotten and throwing a hand at it. “You didn’t tell me any of that!”

“How am I supposed to tell you any of that if I was under the impression that you had a serious boyfriend? I saw you drinking with him, kissing him, just being so happy. If I came up to you and said any of this, I would ruin something that you loved. Do you really think that I’m that selfish?”

“Hyung,” Yoongi slowly straightens up, eyes looking concerned, but Seokjin doesn’t heed it.

“Do you have any idea how hard it’s been? I always want to tell you everything, and for the first time in my life, I couldn’t. So I tried to ignore what I was feeling, but that didn’t work, and so I told my friends, and then I had drop like 40 bucks on patbingsu to find different fucking friends--”

Yoongi’s hand cups his cheek. “Hyung,” he murmurs, “you’re crying.”

Seokjin reaches to up to touch his other cheek, surprised to find hot tears staining his cheek. Shit. “I am.”

“Hyung,” Yoongi lets go of his cheek, and instead wraps himself around Seokjin. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry and I love you. For some time, honestly.“ he wetly laughs, in the neck of his sweatshirt.

Seokjin can’t even believe that this happening, that something that he’s wanted for so long has finally occurred, but he doesn't question it, because, maybe, just maybe he deserves this.  

“Yoongi-yah,” Seokjin murmurs, but he makes sure to speak louder when he says his next words, because he wants even those delinquent piano kids outside can hear him. “I love you too.”

Namjoon and Hoseok keep sending them strange looks, but Seokjin's biding his time because he wants to see how long it'll take before one of them cracks. Yoongi, of course, doesn't notice a fucking thing, or maybe it's more accurate to say that Yoongi just doesn't give a flying fuck.

"That's it." Hoseok slams his pair of chopsticks on the table, a wild look in his eyes. "Are you two dating or not?"

Seokjin merely gives a him a glance before pulling his left hand from out under the table to show it interlocked with Yoongi's right hand and then quickly hiding it again.  

"Ugh, this whole time?"

"Yup." Seokjin responds, unfazed.

"Right in front my freakin’ salad?"

"Hoseok, what are you talking about, there's only jjigae in front of you."

"Y'all are cute." Namjoon grins, dimples evident. "I knew you'd be cute."

"We are not cute. We're not cute at all. If anything we're--"

"Jin-ah," Yoongi interrupts, "can you pass me the salt?"

"Of course, hon." Seokjin slides the shaker to him, and returns to Namjoon and Hoseok. He tilts his head for a second, totally unable to recollect what he was talking about a few seconds ago. “What was I saying?”

"I've never seen him calm down so fast.” Hoseok whispers hushedly.

"I don't think science can explain this.”

"I got a explanation; boy's whipped."

"Will you two stop talking as if I'm not right here? Besides this isn’t such a big deal, we're still Kim Seokjin and Min Yoongi. It's just that we're now..." Seokjin steals a glance at Yoongi before he deciding to take the plunge for it. "Boyfriends.”

Immediately Yoongi, who was so intently grilling meat till then, turns to look at him. "I don't think we're boyfriends."

Seokjin feels his body go cold and whips around to Yoongi. "What do you mean we're not boyfriends?"

"I just.. don't like the term boyfriends. For us."

"Fine. Partners?"

Yoongi immediately wrinkles his nose, so Seokjin tries another tack. "Significant others?”

"Too long."

"Lovers?" Seokjin asks, really starting to feel the worry seep in because he honestly has nothing else to offer.

"We're roommates." Yoongi replies, before a hint of a smile rises on the corner of his lips. "We're eternal roommates." He returns to his soup, leaving Seokjin to finally remember that Namjoon and Hoseok are still there at the table. Both looking like they’ve just witnessed an alien encounter.

"Oh, how long are you going to look at us like that?" Seokjin snaps.

"Jin hyung, don't get me wrong, we love and support you," Namjoon starts, "but it's like..."

"Like the simulation is fucking glitching; that's what it's like." Hoseok finishes. He stands, grabbing his coat. "Come on,” he pats Namjoon’s shoulder, “I gotta go see Kentaro or else I'm going to feel like the most single person on the fucking planet right now."

Namjoon only longingly looks at the unfinished bowl of stew in front of him, before following suit with Hoseok.

“Bye guys,” Yoongi waves.

Seokjin’s plastered smile of goodbye fades the second that Namjoon and Hoseok leave the restaurant. “Yah, what does that mean, ‘eternal roommates’?” Yoongi only smiles in response. Ugh, Seokjin would be ten times angrier if he didn’t look so cute.

“I knew you would yell at me. But...” Yoongi flips his wrist to glance at his watch, “you waited 37 seconds. That’s new record, hyung.”

Seokjin slaps Yoongi’s shoulder. “Don’t patronize me. Just answer the damn question.”

“I take it you don’t remember,” Yoongi sighs. “Remember that night when you blacked out after hailing a cab I almost couldn’t afford?”

Seokjin almost instantly colors in embarrassment. “Well, why would you even let a drunk man make any decisions--”

“I’m not mad, hyung. Anyway, that’s not the point. The point is that I thought you were asleep in the cab, but all of a sudden, you whispered ‘Yoongi, don’t leave me.’”

Seokjin squints his eyes, examining Yoongi more closely to see if Yoongi was actually telling the truth, because this would the first report of Drunk Jin being a sleep talker, and so explicit about his true feelings.

“I would never.”

Yoongi raises a single eyebrow at him. “Who was sober that night?”

Jin considered the question. “Continue.”

“Then you said, ‘Even if you get married to Jimin, we have to live together. We will be eternal roommates.”

“And then?”

“And then you proceeded to drop on my shoulder and drool.”

“Now that I know is a lie. I don’t drool.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes. “The point is that you called us eternal roommates. And that’s what we are.”

“But what does that even mean?” Jin loudly whines. He ignores the dirty look that’s shot at him by a purple haired girl from a neighboring table. Yoongi, however, has caught it and proceeds to harshly whisper at him.

“I have to spell out everything for you, don’t I?”

“Well, I’m not a mindreader, am I?”

“Hyung,” Yoongi starts, but stops for a moment, struggling to find the words, “you’re the person that’s going to be in my life no matter what. Boyfriend, just friend, maybe you break up with me and marry my hyung, I don’t know. But ever since I’ve met you, I knew that you would always be there with me. We’re eternal roommates. We’ll always take up space in each others lives.”

The clatter of cutlery fills the silence that’s erupted between them. Yoongi ducks his head away intensely concentrating on the soup in front of him, while Jin continues to gawk at the side of his face.

“Get up.”

Yoongi gives him a confused look. “What?’

“Get up!”

“Why?” But Yoongi’s obedient, already rising from his seat.

“Because we have to go home.”

“Why?”

“So I can make out with you till the end of time.” Jin fishes for bills in his wallet and throws them on the table, before grabbing Yoongi’s wrist and drags him out of the doors of the restaurant.

Yoongi swats at Seokjin. “Don’t be so loud. And slow down, you haven’t even gotten your jacket on properly.” He becomes dead weight behind him so Seokjin’s forced to turn back and let Yoongi button his jacket and artfully swathe his scarf around his neck, while he wraps his arms around Yoongi’s hips. Ooh, there’s a blush trickling into into Yoongi’s cheeks; Seokjin loves that.

“There,” Yoongi says, looking satisfied. He peers up through his eyelashes. “Well, don’t stare at me so hard.”

“Who’s staring? You’ve got a little,” Seokjin rubs the tips of two fingers on his jaw, only to watch as Yoongi, distracted by cleaning the supposed stain, perfectly presents his left cheek. Seokjin swoops in and presses his lips quickly before Yoongi can ever react.

“Ooh, I can’t believe I fell for that,” Yoongi groans, though there’s quite clearly a smile fighting to be present on his lips, “Ooh, my head hurts.”

Seokjin tenderly regards Yoongi griping in front of him and he only has one thought.

“Why didn’t we do this earlier?”

Yoongi abruptly stops complaining and just shrugs. “We’re dumb. But I figure at least we’re doing it now.”

“We’re gonna be doing it all the time,” Seokjin responds, wiggling his eyebrows. Yoongi laughs and pulls out of Seokjin’s embrace.

“Come on, don’t you you want to go home?”

Home, Seokjin thinks. Where he lives with Min Yoongi, his eternal roommate. He doesn’t think that’s half bad at all.

“Always.”

Fin.