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Chapter Text

Aizawa

Ironically, the video hits when class 1-A is training at the newly renovated Unforeseen Simulation Joint. Proof, as Aizawa has always vaguely suspected, that God exists and hates him in particular.

Most of the teachers are off at an educational conference somewhere in Hokkaido, and so Aizawa is the only teacher supervising the class today. Normally, he would be able to power through it, but due to the explosive conclusion to a long-term drug bust operation, he's gotten even less sleep than usual.

After wrangling twenty boisterous and overpowered children for three hours on that same amount of sleep over the past few days, Aizawa is dead on his feet. He considers going back to the staff lounge to grab his phone and bag, but he's so exhausted he might actually pass out. He decides to head straight home and to skip patrolling tonight.

He leaves campus through the hidden back entrance he's used since All Might came to U.A. and the paparazzi followed. The vultures have calmed down recently, but it's a habit at this point.  

1-A's quarterly health check-up with Recovery Girl is tomorrow morning, so Aizawa can get away with sleeping in a little longer.

Unfortunately, his chronically sleep-deprived body takes a mile when given an inch. Aizawa awakens with a jerk and curses when he sees that he's slept through five alarms.

Aizawa can't glare at his students for being late to class if he's not punctual himself. To save time, he passes by the staff room and heads directly to the classroom. He's already memorized the lesson plan anyway; he's not like All Might who has a Teaching for Dummies book tucked into his pants pocket.

To his chagrin, he's still late. Surprisingly, the entire class is already sitting in their seats, even Kaminari and Ashido.

Aizawa doesn't want to give them the opportunity to comment on his lack of punctuality today, so he launches straight into the lesson.

He's been lecturing for a few minutes when it occurs to him that no one has uttered a word since he walked in. Normally, there would have been at least one outburst by now.

He turns around, and his troublemaker students look more suspicious than usual.

"What is going on?" he asks warily, but they stay speechless and wide-eyed. Exasperated, he singles out the most responsible student in order to solicit an actual response. "Iida?"

"Er-!" His choppy arm motions are even more erratic than usual. "That is, you haven't seen the video yet, Aizawa-sensei?"

Aizawa pauses. "Video?"

Nemuri

They are filing out of the room where the panel has just finished when a stranger approaches them.

"Excuse me! You are the U.A. teachers, correct? Midnight, Present Mic, and...?"

The depowered All Might rubs his neck sheepishly. "Yagi Toshinori. I'm afraid I'm not as well-known as my colleagues. Nice to meet you."

"Yes, a pleasure," the person says distractedly. "I, well, I'm sure you've already heard this before, but I just wanted to say, I truly admire the dedication of the teachers at your school."

"...thanks?" Nemuri says. U.A. is one of the top hero schools in the country, but they don't usually get people who approach them as teachers first and heroes second.

"Of course, All Might is an incredible addition to the staff this year, and both Present Mic and Midnight are in the top 40 hero rankings, but I'm afraid most of us have entirely overlooked Eraserhead."

Now that is even more weird. Nobody really knows about Eraserhead outside of U.A., the police, and obsessive hero nerds, and that's just how Eraserhead likes it.

"Please pass on my regards. I was truly moved by his devotion to protecting his students!" The stranger bows at the waist, and is he actually crying?

"What the heck was that about?" Hizashi says, once the man has left.

Nemuri has a bad feeling about this. She hustles Hizashi and Yagi into an unoccupied room.

Back when they graduated U.A., Nemuri put news alerts on all three of their hero names. Obviously, she's gotten more use out of the alerts on Midnight and Present Mic, but she did get a hit on Eraserhead a few years ago when he first joined the U.A. faculty. Just a small notice in the U.A. press release, but she remembers triumphantly sending the link to their group chat.

There's a lot more than one hit on Eraserhead now. 25,000 results. She refreshes. 85,000 results. She refreshes again. 250,000 results.

"Oh, boy."

With dread, she clicks on one of the top video results with over half a million views. "Never before seen USJ incident footage! Warning: violent content. Viewer discretion advised."

The USJ Incident. By the time Nemuri and Hizashi arrived at USJ, the action was already over. All that remained was the brutal aftermath: students crying and traumatized, Thirteen with their suit torn at the back and barely moving, the invincible All Might made vulnerable.

And Aizawa, so still and so bloodied that she had thought for one moment he was already dead. Her colleague, her old classmate, her best friend for the past twelve years - dead.

Hizashi's voice attack at the remaining small fry villains was more vicious than strictly necessary, and she knew that he feared the same when he saw Aizawa lying on the ground. (Several of the villains at USJ that day never regained their hearing. After Recovery Girl told them the laundry list of Aizawa's injuries, Nemuri had thought darkly, Good.)

They're not witnessing only the aftermath now, as they see the events take place on the screen. 

Midoriya cries, "Sensei, are you going to fight them all alone? Even if you suppress all of their quirks, there are so many of them!"

"A hero always has more than one trick up their sleeves," Aizawa says. His goggles are already on. If they weren't, they'd be able to see by his eyes that he was lying.

Eraserhead is an ambush-type underground hero who operates under the cover of night. His quirk is most effective on villains when they don't see him coming and in the first few seconds of attacking. He doesn't have either advantage in this scenario.

Nevertheless, Aizawa manages to hold his own against the crowd of villains, even scores a hit against the ringleader.

Until he starts wearing down.

Nemuri winces at the muffled scream Aizawa lets out when Shigaraki disintegrates the top layer of skin on his forearm. What a monstrous quirk that teenager has.

But even more monstrous is the Noumu, who comes out of nowhere to crush Aizawa to the ground. Yagi's hand twitches unconsciously to his side, where he was impaled by the same Noumu.

Hizashi gasps."The students!"

Her eyes dart to the corner of the screen, and she sees the small figures of Tsuyu, Mineta, and Midoriya barely visible at the edge of the lake.

The students were all healthy and relatively uninjured by the time backup came (aside from Midoriya, but when was that kid not nursing a broken bone?), so she's aware that nothing terrible ended up happening to them. Nevertheless, she still finds herself praying that the villains don't notice them.

In a flash, Shigaraki is at the lake with his hand poised to disintegrate Tsuyu's face.

"No!" she finds herself gasping, despite having seen Tsuyu raising her hand in class just the other week.

But one second passes, two seconds, and nothing happens.

"You really are a cool guy," Shigaraki says, impressed.

Injured, outnumbered, and immobilized, Aizawa has managed to save his student. A small miracle.

Nemuri wants to close her eyes because she can guess what follows.

The Noumu slams Aizawa into the ground with an audible crack. Aizawa doesn't get up again. No more miracles.

He can't stop the Noumu hurtling towards Midoriya or Shigaraki reaching towards Tsuyu again. But just then the doors slam open.

"Have no fear. For I am here."

It's All Might, and for once, he isn't smiling. He's furious.

Yagi leans over and stops the video. "We know the rest."

He's not smiling now either.

Nemuri licks her lips and tastes salt. At some point, she had begun to weep. She looks over at Hizashi, who has been silently crying as well.

Voice thick, Hizashi warns, "Shouta might not have realized yet. He had the training with his class at - at USJ today."

USJ. Ha. What an amazingly terrible coincidence.

She calls his phone but it goes straight to voicemail. "Shouta, call me back when you get the chance, okay?" she says urgently and hangs up.

"He probably left his phone in the staff room," Hizashi murmurs, uncharacteristically subdued.

"This is a week-long conference, but I'll talk to Principal Nedzu. I'm sure given the circumstances we can return earlier," Yagi offers.

"The storm's pretty bad. The earliest we'll be able to get back is is tomorrow around noon," she observes, already booking return tickets to Tokyo. Principal Nedzu may be her superior, but she's going back to see Aizawa with or without his approval. 

A moment later, Hizashi laughs hoarsely. "Shouta will have fans now. Like that teacher."

Nemuri drags up a weak grin.

"He'll hate that."

Chapter Text

Kana

In her first job out of college, Park Kana learns the hard way why it's a bad idea to drink alcohol in a company setting. Three shots into office happy hour and she's spilled her life story and embarrassing hobbies to her amused and more sober colleagues. She's learned better since then, but two years later she still gets teased for her hero obsession.

"I swear, you're making some of these hero names up," her coworker Ishimaru teases.

Kana huffs. "Just because you haven't heard of Gliding Man doesn't mean he isn't doing great job cleaning up the streets."

"Where are you even finding these heroes? Aren't they supposed to be operating under the radar?"

"Sure, but the police arrests are public record, and they include the names of assisting heroes. You have to go to the station since they only allow you to view physical copies of the arrest records, but that information is available for anyone with an all-access media pass."

"Anyone like you. Who compiles data sets and rankings on underground heroes for fun. What's your official title again?"

"Financial advice columnist," she says sulkily. "You know I got rejected for the hero reporting department. So unfair. 80% of their stories are on All Might! And the other 20% are on the rest of the top ten heroes. I could do so much more."

"All Might sells. Do you really think Gliding Man would? You know Editor James-san is all about the views. Better to stick with your day job."

"One day, I'll get my break!"

One day turns out to be sooner than she could have imagined.

Kana is preparing to head out for the day when she hears Editor-in-Chief James-san bellow, "PARK!"

She edges into his office. "Sir? Er, I got permission from you on Monday to leave early for my doctor's appointment today."

"Cancel it!"

Ugh. Well, not like this is the most unreasonable thing he's asked of her. "May I ask why?"

He tosses a tablet at her. She manages to catch it, fortunately, since he probably would have taken it out of her paycheck if she dropped it. The tablet is playing a video of a hero that she doesn't know. After watching him fight for a few more moments, she recognizes his quirk. The ability to nullify quirks is rare, unlike the more common fire quirks or hardening quirks.

"Eraserhead?" she says with surprise.

James-san nods. "Like I thought, you're the one for this story. I'll be frank: most of Japan - including our hero reporting department - had no idea who this guy was until this video."

He taps on the screen, and her eyes widen when she sees how many views there are for the video. Not quite the amount of traffic All Might gets but closer than any underground hero has ever gotten.

Then, she realizes what he said. "The one for this story?"

"Everyone's scrambling to learn more about this guy. Nekoma over at the Daily World was the one to release the initial video, damn that crafty woman, but all she has is a name. It's going to take the rest of the industry time to research Eraserhead, but you've got a head start with your interest in obscure heroes. I'm temporarily re-assigning you to the hero reporting department while this story is developing. Do a good job, and maybe it won't be temporary."

"Sir, yes sir!"

Maybe getting drunk at her first office party wasn't as bad of a move as she originally thought.

...nah, it was still pretty stupid of her.

Hero Reporting

" Who is Eraserhead?"

by Staff Writer Park Kana

Seventeen drug busts. Three major crime ring takedowns. The highest amount of assisted arrests in the country. And no one, save for a few extreme hero enthusiasts, knew his name before yesterday. He's the homeroom teacher for the most famous first year hero class in Japan, and when you look at the stats, the number one underground hero in the Kanto area... Read More >>

Nedzu

"Principal Nedzu." For someone whose world just been turned upside down, Aizawa appears as calm and implacable as always.

"Aizawa-sensei, I must apologize. It seems like someone managed to hack into the surveillance records. Rest assured that we are searching for the one responsible for the leak."

Aizawa shakes his head. "It doesn't really matter who did it at this point. You should spend your energies on more important tasks."

"You are important to U.A.," Nedzu admonishes.

"Fine. If you have the resources and time to spare, I suppose it might be useful to find out who was behind the leak and what their motives were. Please let me know what I can do to assist in the investigation."

"On that note," Nedzu says delicately, "in light of recent circumstances, I believe it may be best for you to take a hiatus from your underground hero work."

Aizawa scoffs. "Don't coddle me. People know my face now - I've lost the ability to do incognito missions. They know my powers - I've lost the advantage of surprise. What's known can't be unknown. I am now obsolete as an underground hero. It's not a hiatus, it's an early retirement."

Nedzu won't insult him by contesting what they both know to be true. Instead, he says, "You will always have a place at our school. You are one of the finest teachers to enter our halls, and your impact on U.A. students, both future and past, is immeasurable."

It's only because Nedzu has worked with Aizawa for several years now that he can recognize the signs of him softening, ever so slightly.

"I don't regret it," Aizawa says, "I've long since realized that the amount of good I can do as an educator is equal if not greater than the amount of good I can do as a solo hero."

Acknowledging the lightened atmosphere, Nedzu adds, "That, and you adore the children."

"The children are demon brats, hell-bent on ruining my life and sleep schedule with their recklessness," Aizawa says.

Nedzu notes that it isn't a denial.

Chapter Text

Aizawa

Aizawa has three days of blissful quiet after the video is released. Those three days must be far from blissful for the media, who are doubtlessly frantically trying to dig up information on the formerly unknown underground hero. 

A journalist named Park Kana publishes a hastily written profile on Eraserhead the night the video goes viral. Judging by how quickly the profile was released, she must have already had the data and statistics available beforehand. Thankfully, the article is devoid of any personal information and focuses on his track record as an underground hero over the past decade (god, has it really been that long?).

So Aizawa doesn't blame her. Much. If it wasn't her, it would have been some other journalist who put the first nail in his coffin. 

Aside from that anomaly, no other media organization has managed to scrape together enough newsworthy information about him to publish. For a while, Park Kana's profile is re-quoted and regurgitated by every other major news outlet.

But the peace is soon over. It seems like everyone who has ever encountered Eraserhead has a story to share:

"I was in the General Education department with him at U.A. Bet you didn't know that the great Eraserhead failed the Hero Studies entrance exam! Unfortunately, the ability to erase quirks isn't much use against killer robots."

"I was in the same entrance exam! No, I didn't pass either. But I remember thinking that guy with the scarf was a crazy bastard - he was trying to win against all these superpowered applicants with nothing but his fists and a crowbar. It was a damn shame he didn't get into Hero Studies."

"Aizawa-kun was very quiet. Very focused. He would go to the gym any time we had a break, but his General Education grades were quite good. I think we all knew he wasn't going to stay in our department for long."

"Che! He always acted like he was too good for us. He was half-way to the Hero Studies department in his mind already."

"It's an open secret that if you do well in the U.A. Sports Festival, you can join the Hero Studies program regardless of your department. Not that anyone ever managed that accomplishment before him. I don't think any non-Hero Studies students even ever managed to crack top three."

"At the time, I was pretty bitter about losing, but he really did deserve first place. We Hero Studies students were training every single day with the top heroes in Japan. Meanwhile, this Gen Ed kid with zero support from the school came out of nowhere and just destroyed the competition."

"Yeah, it was a surprise to have this no-name Gen Ed student join 1-A in the middle of the year, but we all lost to him so it's not like we could complain. I didn't talk to him much; he mostly hung out with the loud guy and the hot girl. Weird combo, right?"

"He was one of the most precocious interns I had! Most aspiring heroes at least go through a phase of wanting the glory and recognition, but not Aizawa. He knew from the very beginning that he could make the biggest impact from the shadows. Very practical head on those shoulders - almost ruthlessly practical."

"Hands down, Eraserhead is the police department's favorite hero. Doesn't treat us like extras, keeps collateral damage low, and actually fills out paperwork and stays to answer questions after he collars the criminals. God knows we can't say the same about any of the top heroes."

"Aizawa-san totally seems like the lone wolf type, right? Couldn't be further from the case. Sure, he's not the chatty type and I think he prefers doing casework on his own, but he's great to partner with. Fighting with Eraserhead was a breeze because he adjusted so easily to my combat style."

"I respect what he did for those kids, and I'm sure he's a great hero, but who thought it would be a good idea to give that guy children? Five years ago, he expelled my entire class! I was lucky enough to join Shiketsu the year after, but that dude is ice-cold."

"I'm part of that class Aizawa-sensei expelled. Unpopular opinion? We deserved it. Most of us were arrogant asshats used to getting our way with our powerful quirks, some of us needed more time to mature, and the others just weren't suited for heroics. I've done a lot of growing up since then, and I'm so glad that things happened the way they did."

"At first, I was disappointed I wasn't getting a more well-known teacher. But Aizawa-sensei has taught me so much - I wouldn't even be standing in front of you today in one piece if he hadn't prepared me as well as he did."

"Eraserhead saved me. Sure, he didn't do it with a smile like All Might, but that was okay with me. I thought my boyfriend of four years was going to kill me; I don't think I would have wanted to see a smile then. He was there, and he helped me in the darkest moment of my life."

"I made a dumb mistake when I was young, and things snowballed. By the time I knew it, I was 22 and already had a rap sheet the length of my forearm. Heroes - it's like as soon as you've broken the law, you're bad forever to them. No one believes in reformed villains unless it's some dumb romcom. Right before Eraserhead handed me to the police for grand theft auto, he said to me: 'You're not evil. You've just made some stupid decisions. You have potential, so stop wasting it.' He ain't a poet, but no one had ever given enough of a shit about me to even try like he did. Those words got me through that year in prison. And I've been living an honest life ever since."

"Eraserhead doesn't really bother with us petty criminals. Yeah, if you do something big enough that the police are looking for you or if you do something that hurts someone else, he'll come after you. But otherwise, he knows that the only way you get the big fish is through the little fish. He's not bad, for a hero."

Some stories make Aizawa want to grind his teeth in annoyance. Others bring an embarrassed flush to his face.

But the crowning jewel is this:

Some idiotic reporter managed to convince the Tartarus prison to let him interview Stain. First, he plays Stain the clip of Aizawa taking on the League of Villains and reads aloud some of first-hand accounts. And then he asks Stain what he thinks about the hero Eraserhead.

Stain stares crazily into the camera. "Eraserhead. To think, we frequented the same shadowy corners but never crossed paths. Yet, you have been saving people all this time without any recognition. Even those that All Might himself could not save. You...are not a false idol. You are a worthy opponent. A true hero!"

And then Stain almost stabs a guard with the pen that he stole off the reporter's notebook, which ends the interview pretty quickly.

Really, this is how Aizawa always envisioned his retirement from underground hero work. Hounded by dozens of paparazzos and given a eulogy by the most famous serial killer of the generation. 

God really does hate him.

Yagi

"How are you holding up?" Yagi asks.

Wrapped in a blanket burrito on the lounge sofa, Aizawa shoots Yagi a baleful look. In response, he jerks his chin towards the muted television.

The headline on the news program is, "Glowing words about Eraserhead from Stain! Is Eraserhead the next All Might? Up next - a tell-all from Eraserhead's former flame!"

"I should probably keep watching, so I know who exactly to sue for libel," Aizawa says conversationally.

"I'll admit, I'm a bit stumped. My relationship with the press has never been this...volatile."

"You're their golden boy. I'm the 'unshaved hobo who's getting his 15 minutes of fame.'"

Yagi isn't in his All Might form but his grip on the steel chair arm is so tight that it creaks. "Who dared to say that about you?" 

"Some conservative talk show host, it doesn't matter. I couldn't care less about their opinion, but it's true that this fascination is temporary. It will pass, though by now it will be too late to salvage my career as an underground hero."

Yagi deflates. "Right. Your anonymity...The way you tackle hero work and publicity is so different from what I'm accustomed to."

"Trust me, I'm not enjoying the experience of sharing the spotlight with you. You can have it back."

Yagi offers hesitantly, "Is it all bad? Some of the stories people have shared are quite heartwarming!"

Aizawa groans. "Please tell me you haven't read those testimonials."

"I respect your privacy! But young Midoriya sent me a few compilations, and I did scan a few. They have only increased my admiration of you as a hero and educator!"

"...I suppose not all of the stories have been bad. I never knew what happened to the kid who stole that car, so it was good to hear that he's doing well on his own now. And I'm glad the girl with that awful boyfriend seems to be alright."

Yagi beams, happy to Aizawa seems to feel slightly better about his situation.

Then the TV program transitions to the 'tell-all by Aizawa's ex-girlfriend', and Aizawa glowers at the screen again. "I never even dated her!"

"She's very attractive," Yagi says diplomatically.

"And I'm very gay," Aizawa deadpans.

"Ah."

On screen, the "ex-girlfriend" is expounding on how Aizawa has a stoic facade but is really tortured and sensitive on the inside. And also apparently fantastic in bed.

Blushing, Yagi says, "...I'll get you the number of my lawyer."

Chapter Text

Yagi

Aizawa manages to delay speaking to the public for almost two weeks before succumbing to pressure.

He clearly has been hoping that people would lose interest eventually, but Yagi could have told him that Eraserhead was too fascinating of a subject for things to die down that quickly. After the third woman who claims Eraserhead is the father of her children and seventh article analyzing his fight at USJ, Aizawa gives up.

He drags a hand over his face. "I'm going to need to hold a press conference, aren't I."

"I've found that if you give the media what they want, it keeps them from imposing on your time and privacy as aggressively," Yagi agrees.

Hizashi claps him on the back. "I would offer to interview you on my radio show, but I think the people want to see that grumpy face in person."

Nedzu somehow manages to arrange a press conference to be held at U.A. the next day. (His connections as the Principal of the top hero school in Japan can't be underestimated). 

Yagi has never seen Aizawa in anything but his black, loose-fitting clothing. Today, he is dressed in a sharp suit with a cleanshaven face and slicked back hair to match. Not much can be done about bloodshot eyes, but since Aizawa hasn't been able to patrol for nearly three weeks, he actually appears more well-rested than ever (and pissed off about it).

Yagi has always thought that Aizawa was a handsome man, but for the first time others will be able to see it too. Yagi shifts uncomfortably in place. He should be happy that more and more people will realize how attractive Aizawa is, but for some reason the thought bothers him.

"Mind helping me with the tie? Haven't worn one since I had to testify in court for a criminal case three years ago. Normally, I would ask Hizashi or Nemuri, but I have no idea where they've run off to."

"Of course!" Despite appearing more infrequently in the years since the battle with All For One, All Might is still required to make numerous media appearances. Yagi has learned to knot a tie in less than three seconds, but he finds himself taking his time with Aizawa. 

"So. Any advice for this upcoming catastrophe?"

"You're an honest man - some might say too honest," Yagi says knowingly. "I would not suggest lying, but there is no need to give the reporters everything upfront either."

Aizawa is fatalistic about his prospects. "Well, what's the worst that could happen. Nedzu feels like he owes me, even if he shouldn't, so my job security is at least secured no matter what I say."  

"That's the spirit! I'm sure you will be able to admirably conduct yourself, and that everyone will see what a wonderful hero and teacher you are."

"I would prefer that people not regard me more highly, since that's what got me into trouble in the first place," Aizawa says wryly.

Yagi falters. "Right. In that case, I hope you are able to unassumingly conduct yourself so that people forget you?"

"One can hope."

Yagi finishes up the tie. "Off you go, then."

He watches the conference from the backstage TV screen. Aizawa has gotten more than a few pieces of fanmail from followers of Stain since that dreadful interview aired, and Yagi is there for moral support but also as backup security. 

On camera, Aizawa is serious and eloquent. He stonewalls the more prurient or inappropriate questions with a simple "No comment," but is otherwise as truthful as he can be.

"What would you say to those parents who blame UA for not protecting their children better?" a particularly aggressive reporter inquires.

The boldness of the question rouses a few unhappy mutters, but Aizawa handles it like a pro.

"The attack at USJ should have never happened. I am thankful that there were no casualties that day. However, as a teacher, it is my duty to protect my students, and I am ashamed that they were forced to fight for their lives."

Aizawa places his hands on the table and bows his head. "I apologize for our oversight, and I promise UA is doing all we can to make sure it does not happen again."

His eyes are as fierce as his promise, and the reporter shrinks back in her seat. The murmurs from the crowd turn approving.

A youthful-looking journalist pipes up. "Park Kana, Hero Reporting at The Daily Bugle. Some people have claimed that you are the closest thing Japan has to a Quirkless hero. Your Quirk erases other Quirks, but that only puts you the same playing field as your opponent. What would you say to Quirkless children who may want to become heroes?"

Aizawa's eyes flicker in recognition at the familiar journalist's name before he answers. "I originally failed the hero course entrance exam because it favors certain types of physical Quirks. I'm sure there are many others with non-traditional Quirks who have been similarly overlooked in the past. To that end, I will say that as long as your potential is not zero, I believe you can become a hero."   

(Somewhere, a formerly Quirkless Midoriya must be beaming through his tears at hearing those words.) 

Another reporter asks, "Will you be continuing to work as an underground hero? Or will you step into the spotlight now that you've gained accolades from the public?"

It's the first question that has caused Aizawa to pause.

Yagi winces. He knows the fact that Aizawa's sudden exposure has ended his underground hero career is still a sore point.

"No, I will not," Aizawa finally answers. "If you have heard of an underground hero, then they have failed as one. I will continue to do hero work in whatever capacity I can, but my priority at the moment is my job as a homeroom teacher."

"But will you be joining the public ranking charts?" the reporter persists. "Have heroes such as All Might reached out to you for support requests?"

Aizawa's lips twist. "I have no desire to be in the ranking charts. As for whether I will be supporting heroes like All Might, I believe that is a question you should be directing to his office and not to me."

Yagi knows that Aizawa has no intention of working with All Might and is chiefly trying to deflect attention with his non-answer, but the idea is not without merit. All Might hasn't worked with a support hero since Sir Nighteye, but Aizawa is a skilled combatant and more than sharp enough to help with strategy.

The reporters have more questions, but Aizawa seems like he wanted to tunnel into his sleeping bag an hour ago.

Nedzu claps his hands. "Thank you all for coming. We will not be taking any more questions today, but you are free to message our PR department for any further inquiries."

Just as Aizawa is about to exit the stage, he turns around and addresses the reporters almost as an afterthought. "Also, I'm gay. So please stop interviewing women who claim I fathered their children."

The room erupts into chaos, but Aizawa is already gone.

Aizawa

It's possible he made a mistake by dropping the bombshell of his sexuality right before the end of the press conference.

Aizawa maintains that the press would have discovered the truth sooner or later, especially with the number of libel suits he's had to file against women recently, and he would rather give up his secrets on his own terms than have them exposed against his will. 

However, he underestimated how obsessive the public's interest would be. He wouldn't have thought people cared about the sex life of the "hobo hero," but according to Nemuri, he screwed himself over by appearing presentable that day at the press conference. He immediately goes back to not shaving or combing his hair, but the photographic evidence of an attractive Eraserhead is out in the world and can't be taken back. 

Suddenly, the question on everyone's mind is not "Who is Eraserhead?" but "Who is dating Eraserhead?" Since keeping a low profile means that they have no idea who he is close to, every male hero in Japan has become a possible contender for his heart. 

He probably should have followed up his "I'm gay" with an "I'm single" but it would have felt a little too much like he was shamelessly announcing his availability to the Japanese public. Anyway, it's too late at this point. 

Nemuri sends him the particularly egregious clips of his fellow heroes being harassed by paparazzi.

"Nah, I don't mind the age gap, but he's a little too levelheaded for me. I like my lovers a bit more fiery." Hawks winks.

Aizawa has never met the number 3 hero in his life, but apparently the prodigy's unknown boyfriend is one of the seven mysteries of the Hero World. 

Hizashi gets cornered during his Q&A segment by a regular listener who realized his mysterious roommate "Shouta" is in fact Eraserhead.

"Listeners - in full disclosure, Eraserhead and I did date for a few months in high school, but we decided we were better off platonically. We've been best friends for almost fifteen years at this point, and I wouldn't have it any other way!"

He's not upset with Hizashi for revealing their dating history - it's all in the past, and someone would have found those embarrassing prom photos eventually.

The disclosure leads to the renaming of the rarepair "ShoutaMic" as the now wildly popular "EraserMic." There is a sharp influx in the pairing's fanfiction and art, with which Nemuri also gleefully spams his phone. Aizawa installs an adult filter to preserve his sanity. 

A particularly suicidal reporter approaches Endeavor after a villain capture. He barely gets out an "Eraserhead-" before Endeavor gives him a look. Wisely, the reporter closes his mouth and backs away. 

Aizawa is actually glad Nemuri sent him that clip because it explains why Todoroki had looked vaguely traumatized in class that morning. 

One day, the paparazzi approach All Might. 

Aizawa never liked All Might until he met Yagi Toshinori. He's nursed a firmly repressed crush for Yagi and begrudging appreciation for All Might ever since. Aizawa has also been coming to the realization that he can't have one without the other. The whole being carried to safety in a bridal hold during the USJ incident didn't help with quashing his feelings, even if he was barely conscious enough to remember it.

"All Might! Inquiring viewers would love to know - are you Eraserhead's mystery lover?" The reporter shoves the microphone into All Might's face. She looks like she's expecting to get a quick negative in response. The press has already asked every other top 10 male hero at this point, so this is just to cover all their bases.

All Might is in the process of slowly lowering a 3-ton truck to the ground. It never ceases to amaze Aizawa how little the paparazzi seem to think of picking a proper time and place for questions.

All he needs to say is no. 

Instead, All Might blushes and almost drops the truck. "What? Eraserhead is a very handsome, I mean, very inconspicuous colleague, but I would never presume to...I mean, he would never-"

The reporter looks delighted at the unexpected scoop. 

"I think I hear someone who needs rescuing. Farewell!" All Might escapes as subtly as a three-hundred-pound man made of pure muscle and optimism can. 

Yagi! Aizawa wants to scream in frustration. That is not what you were supposed to do!

Chapter Text

Yagi

"We need to talk," Aizawa says.

Yagi, who has been taking up as little space as possible in the corner of the staff room, gives up on hiding.

He sighs. "Yes, we probably should."

The other teachers are kind enough to immediately resume their conversations at a louder volume in order to dispel the tense silence that blanketed the room when Aizawa approached him.

As soon as Aizawa shuts the door behind him in the classroom, Yagi blurts out, "I'm sorry!"

"What are you sorry for?"

Yagi has witnessed Aizawa's technique of drawing out understanding and remorse from juvenile wrongdoers before. Yagi has acted quite stupidly, so perhaps he deserves it being used on him.

He takes a deep breath. It's humiliating, but it must be said. "I apologize for imposing my unwanted feelings on you in public. I can only offer my-"

"Don't be a fool," Aizawa says impatiently. "Your feelings are far from unwanted."

"I can only-" Yagi suddenly registers the meaning of those words. "Only-huh?"

"You're an attractive man in both of your forms, and I...admire you." Aizawa confesses his regard in much the same matter-of-fact manner that he makes statements like, "Bakugou blew up the training room today" or "These gremlin children will drive me to an early grave."

"I rather thought you found me to be an annoying do-gooder who gives too much leeway to the press and needs to improve his teaching skills," Yagi says.

"Well, yes. Those feelings aren't mutually exclusive."

Still shocked, Yagi points at himself. "You like me?"

Aizawa breaks his gaze. "My attraction to you is irrelevant for this discussion."

"Of course it's relevant! I-I like you too!"

"Wonderful, we both enjoy each other's company. Moving on-"

Aizawa still isn't looking at Yagi, so Yagi steps forward and holds him by the shoulders. "I never dreamed that you would return my feelings, Aizawa."

"Neither did I," Aizawa says briskly. "I would have never told you, if you hadn't given your admission to a reporter on live television."

"Why not?" Yagi protests.

"You must know there's no point. We may both be heroes and teachers, but we lead very different lives. You thrive in the limelight, and I operate in the shadows-" Aizawa breaks off as he realizes the last statement is no longer true.

Yagi winces. "I know that you don't like attention - I can't say I enjoy it either, and I wish I could have handled the reporter's question with more composure."

"It's one thing to be the indie topic of the moment, and another to be the first romantic partner All Might has ever had." He pauses. "Or at least the first romantic partner made known to the public?"

Yagi coughs. "Er, both."

Aizawa twitches. "That's probably worse. I don't suppose you have another crush waiting in the wings that you'd be willing to divert the public's attention to?"

"I haven't felt this way about anyone else before," Yagi says honestly and watches in delight as Aizawa's attempt to bury his red face in his scarf is foiled by Yagi's grip on his shoulders.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Aizawa says firmly, despite his blush. "We'd never hear the end of it."

Yagi wilts. It's the same tone Aizawa uses when he announces pop quizzes or brutal training exercises, which means he isn't going to change his mind.

"I couldn't help but overhear your dilemma!" A screen drops from the ceiling with Nedzu's cheerful face.

Yagi's so down that he can't even bring himself to be upset with the invasion of privacy.

Aizawa grits his teeth. "This is a private conversation, Principal."

"You probably shouldn't have chosen the classroom with our newest surveillance set-ups then!" Nedzu says. "Aizawa, you're probably aware that no one will believe All Might if he disavows any attraction to you now, and I'm afraid to be 'the one that got away' would be a rather permanent label on you."

"Where are you going with this?"

"You might have to choose the lesser of two evils at this point. All Might's ex-boyfriend would probably fade from the media faster than the only unrequited love of All Might's life."

Aizawa is worryingly silent.

"Perhaps, if you two were to engage in a fake relationship for a set period - say, three to four months - and then end it amicably! My analysis of past celebrity couplings shows that nothing cools the fires of gossip more than a domestic relationship and a friendly parting."

It was hard enough hiding his feelings for Aizawa while they were just colleagues - to hide them when the world thinks they are lovers seems impossible.

While Aizawa isn't looking, Nedzu gives Yagi a wink.

Oh. OH.

That's right - he wouldn't have to hide his feelings. Instead, he would be encouraged to act as soppily enamored as he wanted to. And perhaps, given the opportunity to "date" All Might, Aizawa might realize it's not the disaster he fears it to be.

Aizawa says slowly, "I suppose that could work. We'd have to pretend that we're in love. And neither of us would be able to engage in a real relationship for those few months."

"I'm great at pretending!" Yagi exclaims, conveniently forgetting what got them into this mess in the first place.

Warming up to the idea, Aizawa notes, "Those vultures would cease harassing every male hero I've spoken to in the last ten years. No doubt, my new male fans would stop sending me those creepy letters once they see I'm taken. They couldn't possibly live up to the number one hero."

Yagi nods in agreement like a bobble-head.

Aizawa pins him with his stare. "You, too. Once you see what it's like to be in an actual relationship with me, I'm sure you'll give up on your delusions as well."

Yagi purposefully refrains from responding to the last point - he's certain that once he sees what Aizawa is like in a relationship, he'll never want to let go. He says gamely, "I can't say I predict any downsides to this plan."

After a drawn-out staring contest (which Aizawa inevitably wins), Aizawa nods sharply. "Let's do this."

This is either the best idea Yagi has ever had - or the worst.

Chapter Text

Aizawa

"Wait, wait. Let me get this straight. You and Yagi-san are both into each other. But you're going to be fake-dating to trick the press?"

"Yes," Aizawa answers Hizashi. "It's pretty straightforward. I don't understand your confusion."

"I think this is the starting premise for at least five of the softcore erotica novellas I've read," Nemuri volunteers.

"Maybe my confusion is stemming from, uh, the question of why you don't just date each other for real? Don't think I've forgotten the time you admitted that All Might was your sexual awakening."

Hizashi is such a traitor.

"Shouta!" Nemuri says joyfully.

"I told you that in confidence!" Aizawa hisses.

Hizashi continues, "Not everyone gets a chance to get together with their childhood crush! Plus, he's clearly smitten with you."

"Do you honestly think it makes sense for someone like me to date someone like All Might? We're from two completely different worlds."

"You're both damn good heroes. That's the most important thing," Hizashi insists.

"And besides, my fifteen minutes of fame may be stretching on longer than predicted, but if I'm in a relationship with All Might, those fifteen minutes will last forever. Even if I'm no longer an underground hero, that doesn't mean I want to sign myself up for an eternal spotlight."

Stumped for a moment, Hizashi finally says, "Well, then you'll have to decide for yourself whether it's worth it."

Is All Might, no - is Yagi worth the complete upheaval of Aizawa's life? He doesn't know yet. But he has a feeling he's going to find out.

With Nedzu's advice, they decide to reveal the relationship organically. Or at least, as organically as a fake relationship can be.

That means going out on dates and letting the press catch on slowly to the new relationship status.

Aizawa is wearing a face mask and Yagi a baseball cap as they stroll through the park. They're both pointedly ignoring the phones pointed at them and the near-blinding camera flashes.

Yagi's hand keeps brushing up against Aizawa's as they walk.

"Stop that," Aizawa says in exasperation and grabs the unruly hand in his.

Yagi nearly spits out blood.

Aizawa ignores his sputtering and pulls their clasped hands closer to his eyes to examine them.

He can't help but notice that Yagi's hand dwarfs his own. It feels rough and calloused, as can be expected from a strength-based hero who has been operating for the past two decades. Then again, so are Aizawa's, which are covered in scars. Yagi runs hot, Aizawa notes, and determinedly ignores what that implies about the rest of his body.

The handholding, involuntary as it may have started, is...nice.

Next is lunch, where they have a surprisingly engaging conversation on correlation between crime rate and poverty.

Aizawa knew that Yagi was more than he seemed after getting to know him as a fellow teacher, but somehow he never expected Yagi to be so well-informed on ethics, politics, and philosophy as well.

"As it currently stands, the criminal justice system fuels the poverty cycle," Yagi says soberly. "I make donations every year to support low-income neighborhoods and recidivism reduction programs, but sometimes there's only so much All Might can do. I've found that vigilantes and underground heroes like yourself can often be more effective and understanding of the societal causes of villainy."

Aizawa has honestly never found Yagi hotter - and he's counting All Might's front-page swimsuit magazine spread that fueled an adolescent Aizawa's fantasies for the entirety of middle school.

Finally, they conclude their date at the cat cafe.

Despite being a hulking mass of muscle, Yagi is surprisingly good with cats. They treat him like a mobile cat tree. 

Yagi is swatted in the face by one of the more cantankerous cats, and Aizawa can't help but let out a laugh.

Yagi looks at him like as if he's something precious. "You have a wonderful smile, Aizawa!"

"I've been told I look like a crazed sadist when I smile, actually."

"Nonsense! I think your smile is adorable," Yagi says earnestly.

And cue Aizawa needing to smother his red face in a nearby cat's soft fur.

It's honestly a perfect first date. Not that Aizawa has been able to go on many of those with his schedule these past few years, but even he can recognize he's encountered something special.

He acknowledges this epiphany and then immediately represses it.

Within a few hours, every publication is blaring headlines like, "Heroes All Might and Eraserhead Dating?!" and "The Inside Scoop on EraserMight!"

However, they can't seem to agree on whether Eraserhead and All Might are already in a relationship or are just starting out.

One enterprising fan makes an AMV compiling every photograph that has ever contained both Eraserhead and All Might. Her crowning achievement is a screenshot of All Might holding Eraserhead in a princess carry at USJ. She has thoughtfully used a hazy vignette filter combined with a frame of flowers. 

She argues that the two of them have been dating since they met at UA and describes a detailed timeline that would honestly rival any conspiracy theory out there.

Others assume that All Might's on-tape confession spurred their relationship. How romantic it is - All Might's blooming first love! And Aizawa must have been stunned to learn the No. 1 hero's feelings but delighted to accept!

Aizawa cannot be bothered to make a clarification either way. It's clear to everyone that Eraserhead and All Might are at least in some kind of romantic relationship, and that's enough for his purposes.

Reactions range from stunned horror to overjoyed acceptance.

The same suicidal reporter approaches Endeavor once more, having clearly gained no additional survival instincts since the last encounter.

"Endeavor, what do you have to say about your long-term rival dating a hero more than ten years younger than him?"

Endeavor's face goes through quite an interesting journey before he melts the camera.

This reaction is scarcely better than the interview with Hawks.

"Let's just say it's not the largest age gap I've seen? They're both consenting adults, so I don't see what the big deal is. Go Eraserhead, though. All Might's a total DILF, even if he doesn't have kids."

And if Aizawa never has to call up Nemuri to ask her what a DILF is and listen to her laughing on the line for a straight ten minutes, he will be grateful.

Meanwhile, a reporter who has been conducting street interviews is horrified to later discover that the creepy white-haired man she interviewed was in fact the notorious leader of the League of Villains.

They pull the footage after one broadcast, but not before a dozen clips of the video have been saved onto the Internet forever.

"What are your thoughts about the hottest new hero couple - Erasermight?" she says, sticking a microphone in front of the hooded man who just walked out of the video game store.

In retrospect, she was beyond lucky that he didn't disintegrate her audiovisual equipment on the spot.

Shigaraki Tomura wrinkles his nose. "All Might sucks, but Eraserhead is cool. Honestly, he can do so much better."

The reporter looks stunned - All Might's approval rate is close to 99%, so almost no one ever has anything negative to say about him. Shigaraki leaves before she can inquire further about his opinion.

Aizawa tries not to think too hard about the fact that one of the most wanted villains in Japan disapproves of him dating All Might. Disapproves because he thinks Eraserheard is too cool for the number one hero and can do better.

Disapproval from villains, in this case, is still probably better than approval.

The idiot who initially interviewed Stain about Aizawa has since learned from his mistakes. This time, he emails his questions instead of visiting the Tartarus Prison in person.

The only message Stain provides is, "I approve of this relationship."

Oh, well, as long as my newfound relationship is Stain-approved, Aizawa thinks sardonically.

Ironically, dating All Might - and having enthusiastic approval from a celebrity serial killer - does seem to have drastically reduced the amount of love letters that he's been getting.

It turns out that most suitors don't have the ego to think they'd be more appealing than All Might, or the bravery to try and break apart a villain-sanctioned relationship.

In place of admiring confessions, Aizawa is now receiving metric tons of fanart and fanfiction.

Some of the artists and writers are quite talented. And some of them should definitely not have gotten past his adult filter.

All in all, dating All Might is quite different than what a young Aizawa had once dreamed it would be like. It isn't like his fantasies.

It's better.

Chapter Text

Aizawa

The perpetually single All Might finally being taken off the shelf by an underground hero is as much of a bombshell as expected.

However, Aizawa is less concerned with how the general public will react, and more about what the people close to him will think.

The UA faculty were told the truth, but the students were temporarily deemed too risky to be in on the secret.

Admittedly, Aizawa does wonder how class 1-A will react to the confirmation that he is "dating" All-Might. He treats all of his students fairly, as is his credo. However, he has to admit that he is partial to this year's class. Going through a life-and-death situation and waking up to repeated nightmares that his students died at the hands of adult villains would do that to you.

Even before the entire mess occurred with the media, Aizawa had taken a look at Kaminari's confiscated phone and seen the inane nicknames the children had given him in their group chat. They were calling him "Dadzawa" and All Might "Dad Might." It seems like Iida and Yaoyorozu had made token protests to the monikers but ultimately succumbed to their classmates' enthusiasm.

So, how does class 1-A react?

By and large, they are thrilled. In fact, one might say that they are overly enthusiastic. A small sampling of reactions:

Kirishima cries tears of joy. "The two manliest teachers I know getting together! It's so amazing!"

Tsuyu places a finger on her chin thoughtfully. "I never thought about it before, but you do suit each other. I'm sure you'll be very happy together!"

Bakugo scoffs. "Che, I guess if All Might had to date anyone, the weirdo in the sleeping bag isn't the worst choice." Aizawa is aware this is Bakugo's version of scattering congratulatory flower petals.

Yaoyorozu clutches his hand in hers with sparkling eyes. "Aizawa-sensei, if there are any...formal occasions in the future, rest assured that I can provide the two of you with the most elegant of tuxedos!"

Kaminari, sneaking a text to Sero before Aizawa confiscates his phone once again: "All Might's usually pretty lax about grading and stuff, right? Maybe he'll rub off on Aizawa-sensei, and he'll stop being such a dictator."

Aoyama spins in a pirouette and shouts, "L'amour est la poésie des sens!" which Hizashi later informs him translates to, "Love is the poetry of the senses!" No wonder Aoyama is doing so well in Hizashi's English class and Nemuri's Art History class. 

(And probably worst of all:

"Size difference," whispers a female voice Aizawa highly suspects is Hagakure.

It takes a moment for Aizawa to process her words before his face turns red.)

Aside from the usual offenders, Aizawa is most curious about how Midoriya will react.

Aizawa assumes that Yagi has let Midoriya in on the secret of their fake dating. Yagi and Midoriya are much closer than a student-teacher relationship would normally require, even for two who appear to share similar powers. Yagi serves as a parental or mentor-like role for Midoriya, from what Aizawa has observed.

But despite this insider knowledge, Midoriya greets Aizawa with a formal bow. "You've both helped me so much! There's no one that deserves this happiness more than you two."

Aizawa raises an eyebrow. "Unlike your classmates, Yagi must have told you that our relationship is only for show."

"He did. However, you truly are important to him - I can tell. Being with you is probably one of the only self-indulgent things he's ever done as the number one hero."

Midoriya and Yagi must be even closer to each other than he thought, if even a child could see through the burden of Atlas that All Might is carrying on his shoulders.

"Did you know that my Quirk only came in this year?"

Aizawa is taken aback by the non sequitur.

"That's news to me. I noticed the unusual self-destructiveness of your Quirk on your very first day, but it makes more sense if you were unused to using it." He frowns. "You really should have been assigned a Quirk counselor and extra late-stage training if that's the case."

Midoriya smiles. "Thank you for your concern, Aizawa-sensei. Yagi-san has been helping me master my Quirk. But what you said at the press conference about Quirkless individuals being able to become heroes too resonated deeply with me."

Aizawa shifts, uncomfortable as always with sincere gratitude. "I meant it."

"I know you did! That's why it was so meaningful to hear." Midoriya laughs. "The point I wanted to make was that I was essentially Quirkless to the outside world when I met Yagi-san. And you must know how the Quirkless are treated."

Indeed, Aizawa does.

Through no fault of their own, Quirkless people are treated as second-class citizens. Even though there are relatively "useless" Quirks like being able to change the color of one's tongue or being able to flip a heads on a coin 59 out of 100 tosses, people with those minor Quirks are still treated as more capable than those without Quirks at all. It is a common prejudice that the Quirkless were born evolutionarily backwards and therefore inferior in temperament, morality, and ability.

"I may have a powerful Quirk now, but the fact that he was willing to give me so much while believing I was Quirkless means that Yagi-san is not one to choose his social circle based on societal status."

Aizawa nods slowly.

He gets what Midoriya is trying to convey. The biggest reason holding Aizawa back from a relationship with Yagi despite their mutual feelings is his belief that they belong to two different worlds. Midoriya is saying that Yagi, at least, doesn't care about such things.

Midoriya pauses before leaving.

"Aizawa-sensei, I hope I'm not overstepping by saying this. But Yagi-san is very important to me. I hope that you won't hurt him. It would be best if you could allow yourself be happy with him. Because I believe that is what would bring both of you the most joy."

Aizawa lets his head thump against the wall after Midoriya is gone.

Sigh. This could probably be considered a blessing from the son-in-law?

Hizashi

Despite being a well-known radio host and pro hero, Hizashi was still starstruck when he learned that All Might would be joining the UA teaching staff.

He remembers shaking Aizawa by the shoulders. "All Might! The number one hero! I can't believe he's going to be our coworker. Do you think he'd come on my show?"

Aizawa looked bored. "He's just a man, Hizashi."

"The man, the myth, the legend! And you're one to talk. Don't think I've forgotten about those magazines under your bed when we were in high school!"

"You-!"

And then Hizashi had to duck for cover so Aizawa didn't eviscerate him.

He could have never imagined that one day he'd be in the position of giving All Might a shovel talk over his best friend.

Hizashi has gotten more used to All Might after a few months working with him, but he admits that interacting with the most famous man in Japan is still nerve-wracking.

He would have tried to get Nemuri to talk with Yagi instead, since she can be a lot scarier than him. However, he was afraid that she would say something wildly inappropriate and ruin the mood.

Besides, it isn't really going to be much of a shovel talk, not for someone like Yagi.

Hizashi loves his friends to the point that he often falls into the trap of thinking that no one they date is worthy of them.

Aizawa comes off as the one with Resting Bitch Face, but Hizashi is in fact the most judgmental of the three.

He may have acted perfectly polite when Nemuri introduced them to her new girlfriend, Mount Lady, but secretly he was tallying up all the flaws he noticed - cockiness, taking credit for other heroes' work, an over-reliance on size, and so on.

Meanwhile, Aizawa had been the one to say, "Hizashi, I know what you're thinking, and I don't deny any of it. But Nemuri likes her, and I think she's genuine about Nemuri too. She's young. She'll learn."

It's a lot more difficult to find faults with All Might, the record-holding No.1 hero for the last two decades.

And it isn't just his professional track record of integrity and self-sacrifice. Having gotten to personally know the man behind All Might, Hizashi understands that Yagi is genuine, down-to-earth, and caring despite his celebrity.

Honestly, Yagi is the perfect partner for the cynical Aizawa. Besides, Hizashi can see Yagi's adoration for his best friend practically shine through his eyes. Not enough people really understand how amazing of a man Aizawa is, but Yagi is definitely one of them.

Nevertheless, as Aizawa's best friend, Hizashi has a responsibility to give his significant other The Talk. Even if Yagi isn't technically his significant other yet.

"You like Shouta," Hizashi accuses bluntly.

Yagi hems and haws, before slumping his shoulders in resignation. "Yes, I do. Very much."

"How do you feel about it now that you've had some fake dating experience? Do you think he's too strict? Sloppy? Cold?"

"No! Not at all." Yagi says firmly, "Aizawa is Aizawa. He might be strict, but that's because he has high standards for himself and for others. He comes off as cold, but he's actually so compassionate within. And sloppy...I won't deny that he doesn't care much about grooming or fashion, but I think he's the most handsome man I know!"

Yagi really is a goner.

Hizashi gives him a thumbs up. "That's the correct answer! Now, I'm guessing you would like your fake relationship to become real as a next step?"

Yagi pokes his two index fingers together. "In an ideal world, yes. But I didn't want to push."

"Smart! Shouta is like a feral street cat. If you come on too strong, he'll want to run away. I think your strategy of slowly getting closer to him and showing him what it could be like to date you is perfect."

Hizashi raises a hand. "Just one thing! I know you're a gentleman, Yagi, but you can be bolder in showing your affections."

Yagi says fretfully, "Won't he think I'm being too clingy?"

"This is a secret that you have to swear to keep." He waits for Yagi to agree, then continues: "Shouta had a huge crush on you in high school."

Yagi looks like he was just handed a check for a billion dollars - disbelieving at his good fortune.

"He would kill me for telling you this, but he actually had posters and magazines of you in his room. His favorite was your home-cooking and gardening series. Shouta may seem like a stone-cold motherfucker, but in reality, he's super into that domestic, sappy stuff. Which you seem great at. I'm honestly shocked that his fantasies in high school lined up so closely with reality."

"I'll bring him a bento tomorrow!" Yagi says excitedly.

"That's the spirit. You'll be able to break down his walls in no time. I'm cheering you on, Yagi!"