Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Nicole’s life up until this point had been...fairly ordinary.

She went to school. Got good grades. Pissed her parents off. Went to college and joined the police academy. The usual.

It had been so normal, in fact, that at one point Nicole kind of...freaked out. She referred to it as her crisis. It wasn’t a midlife or quarter life crisis...she just...suddenly had a moment. And that moment made her use all her saved up vacation days and take off to Vegas. Then she came back with a wife who turned out to be a much better friend than an actual wife, and not long after, they seperated.

As soon as she came home, she transferred to a small town that was looking for some fresh blood and that’s how she ended up in Purgatory. As much as Nicole pretended to just be paying her rookie dues with what was considered one of the worst shifts, she would volunteer for it as much as possible. Someone would have to pry that shift from her cold dead hands.

Because every night at exactly 9:30pm, she watched as the most beautiful girl she’d ever seen walked into Shorty’s. And she’d sit and wait until 1am when the same beautiful woman would stumble back out, clearly intoxicated but still unquestionably the woman of Nicole’s dreams.

She had long, wavy dark hair and bright blue eyes Nicole swore she could see from a mile away. She also had perfect, ivory skin that Nicole was sure felt just as soft as it looked. That and her devil-may-care attitude...Nicole had never actually spoken two words to her, but she was in love.

Completely and utterly in love.

So for six months, she willingly took the shift. She sat outside of Shorty’s in case of an incident when most of the time it was quiet. Just a handful of people stumbling home. She didn’t expect the small town cop life to be exciting, but this was a new level of boredom. But every moment was worth it for when she got the see the woman that she had figured out was named Wynonna.

Nicole didn’t know much about her and she certainly wasn’t about to go around asking people about her. Especially not with the carefully crafted image of her she had in her mind.

She imagined finally going up and talking to Wynonna. She might be kind of brash and defensive at first, she looked the type, but quickly she would be charmed by Nicole. They’d go on their first date to dinner in the city, and Nicole would kiss her at her front door. While Nicole was driving home, Wynonna would call her and say she missed her already and Nicole might tease her a little bit before saying she missed her too. Then they’d go on another date and be inseparable and eventually get married. Just first...Nicole had to talk to her.

Some day...some day she would get the courage to talk to her.

***

But today was not that day.

The stale bagel she had gotten should have been an omen that tonight wasn’t going to go well. Still, Nicole remained sitting outside of Shorty’s in her police cruiser with her hard, dry sandwich from that morning.

She chewed the bagel slowly, grimacing as it stuck to the roof of her mouth. Nicole watched the Christmas lights that had been hung up outside the bar blink on and off in different patterns, reflecting off the snow The radio was turned on softly and old Christmas music crooned through the speakers as she sat.

It would be very romantic if not for her only company being a mediocre bagel sandwich.

Mid-chew, a familiar figure walked right besides the cruiser and Nicole inhaled abruptly. Gasping, she quickly grabbed her coffee and drank it down in an attempt to dislodge the bagel from her throat. She hit the steering wheel as she took a deep breath again.

“Fuck,” she coughed, eyes watering.

There was a soft knock on the window and Nicole jumped again, only blushing deeper when she saw Wynonna leaning over and looking in the window. Nicole wiped at her watery eyes and rolled down the window, nerves alight in her stomach. The cold air from the outside hit Nicole in the face and she swore she could smell the snow in the air.

“H-hey,” Nicole said weakly. She cursed herself and cleared her throat. “I mean um...hey. Hi.”

Wynonna’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline and she chuckled. “Shouldn’t you be making me nervous, flatfoot?”

Nicole blushed and hoped the darkness of the night hid it. “Sorry, you just caught me off guard.”

“That’s what everyone wants to hear from their local law enforcement,” Wynonna said. “Listen, Flat Foot, I just heard you dying and wanted to make sure I didn’t have to Heimlich you.”

“I’m good. Thank you,” Nicole said, trying to remain professional. There was so much she wanted to say and her mind was racing. Just a simple ‘hello nice to meet you’ would have worked. But instead she just gaped at Wynonna.

Big blue eyes blinked back at her in confusion. Wynonna just tapped the top of the patrol car. “Alright then,” she said before straightening back up. “See you around, Rookie.”

Nicole watched Wynonna walk away and exhaled noisily.

“Fuck,” Nicole said, letting her forehead fall onto the steering wheel as Wynonna disappeared into Shorty’s. “Fuck.”

Her chance, her one chance and she made a fool of herself. So much for a good first impression. This would happen to her. She used to be so...suave. Nicole would walk into a bar with a swagger that got her basically any girl that she wanted. Not to be stuck up or anything...but she had never had a problem getting a girl.

Then Shae happened...Nicole thought she had found the love of her life. Until they got home from Vegas and actually lived together. The divorce was quick and painless and now they were friends. Especially since they lived hundreds of miles away from each other.

Which is why it was comforting to see her phone flash with Shae’s number at that moment. She slid her thumb across the front and pressed the phone to her ear, head still on the steering wheel.

“Hello?” she mumbled.

“Jeez, don’t sound so happy to hear from me,” Shae joked. “I just called to see how you’re doing. Haven’t heard from you in a while.”

“Fine,” Nicole groaned, leaning back in her seat. “Sorry I haven’t called. I’ve been on the graveyard shift so I figured you’d be sleeping when I was off.”

“You don’t sound fine,” Shae said, waving off the second part of Nicole’s statement. “What’s up?”

Nicole sighed dramatically and wrinkled her nose. “Well…”

“It’s a girl, isn’t it?”

“Kinda?”

“That could mean...a lot of things,” Shae said.

Nicole looked up towards Shorty’s and wondered what Wynonna was doing now. “Well, remember that woman I told you about? Who I saw every day?”

“Yeah. The drunk one?”

“She’s more than that. But yes,” Nicole confirmed. “Well I talked to her-”

“Oh! That’s good!” Shae said, voice dripping with enthusiasm.

“No, not good. I was choking and made an idiot out of myself,” Nicole said. “Now I definitely don’t have a chance.”

Shae chuckled. “You’re being a little dramatic, don’t you think? Just go in and talk to her.”

“She’s just so pretty,” Nicole sighed, picking at a worn area on the steering wheel. “Maybe someday.”

“You know what they say, you snooze you lose,” Shae singsonged. “Speaking of, want to come over for Christmas?”

Nicole frowned, remembering the last time she went over to Shae’s family’s place for a holiday. It was Thanksgiving and Nicole was sure she wasn’t going to get out alive. She figured that bringing your ex-wife to a family holiday probably wasn’t the best move.

Even still, the hard reality of being alone during the holidays again pained her a little. NIcole would admit she was lonely. She didn’t talk to her parents anymore, had no nearby friends or acquaintances and was definitely not going to spend her holidays with her ex wife. Again.

“Um...I would if I could get more than a day off. Plus flights...Thank you though,” Nicole said with a chuckle. “If I go back into your mom’s house, your Nana will for sure murder me.”

“You’re not wrong about that,” Shae said. “Shoulda known better than to invite a white girl to dinner. How did you not know what black eyed peas were?”

“I’m sorry,” Nicole groaned, smile still apparent in her voice. “I know now!”

“Better late than never,” Shae quipped. “Okay, so you’re not going to dinner at my place. Please tell me you’re not going to do what you did last year and sit alone in your apartment with CJ?”

Nicole shrugged. “It’s a house this year.”

“Nicole. Please just do me a favor. Find some place to go on Christmas or I’m going to fly down there and kidnap you from your sad existence,” Shae said. “Okay? I just don’t want you to be alone like last year.”

“Fine,” Nicole said with a small roll of her eyes. “But I better go. I am still on duty after all.”

“Right right. Okay, well I’ll talk to you later.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Go talk to the girl. Bye!” Shae added quickly before hanging up.

***

A few hours later, Nicole looked at the time on her car dash. One am. Her shift was a half hour away from being done. That meant that Wynonna was due to stumble out at any moment. Nicole ran a hand through her hair and put the beanie back on her head, adjusting the collar of her uniform to make sure it was straight.

She took the half eaten bagel from earlier and made sure it was in the bag before she put it on the floor of the cruiser. Out of sight, out of mind.

“I’m going to talk to her,” Nicole said in a little pep talk to herself. “I’m going to look her in the eye and say...hello.”

Nicole nodded to herself, trying to build up her confidence before Wynonna wandered out of the bar. She opened the tin of mints she kept in the middle compartment of the car and opened it, popping a mint into her mouth before she stashed the tin again.

“Okay,” Nicole said, watching as the door opened. “This is it.”

Sure enough, like clockwork, Wynonna walked out of the bar and into the biting night air. She struggled with zipping up the front of her leather jacket, drunken fingers tripping over the zipper for a moment before she finally got it. Nicole sighed as Wynonna stuffed her hands in her pockets and squinted up at the streetlight like it had offended her.

Nicole put her hand on the car door, ready to get out and talk to her. This was it. Her chance.

Wynonna started walking off back towards the car. Nicole’s heart raced for a moment before she let out a sigh, body going slack in her seat.

No. She couldn’t do it.

“I’m such a wuss,” Nicole said to herself as she watched Wynonna walked past the cruiser and down the street towards the train tracks. “Fuck.”

Nicole felt regret settle almost immediately in her stomach as she watched through the side view mirror as Wynonna walked away. Why was she like this? Completely and utterly unable to talk to this woman. Nicole knew she was supposed to be with her. She knew, deep down in her heart, that Wynonna was important to her. Now she just...had to figure out a way to make it happen.

Her thoughts were derailed when she saw two guys emerge from the darkness, and start walking quickly towards Wynonna from the side just as she was about to cross the train tracks. Nicole sat up a little straighter, eyes on them to see if they were going to try and pull something. One of them had a santa hat on while the other donned a headband with antlers. They were several yards away, but she could get there quickly if she had to. As soon as one of them grabbed for Wynonna’s arm, Nicole was out of her car in a flash.

“Hey!” she shouted, hand on her weapon as she started to jog towards them. “Purgatory Sheriff’s Department! Hands off!”

They didn’t hear her or didn’t care, one yanking at Wynonna’s arm. Wynonna took a drunken swing at one of the guys. The other one punched her in the back of the head and she stumbled forward.

Nicole drew her weapon and started to run towards them as she shouted. “PSD! Step away from her!”

One of the guys noticed her and cursed, giving Wynonna one more good punch before both of them ran away. Wynonna collapsed on the train tracks and Nicole could hear her head hit the tracks even from a yard away.

“Shit,” she said, reholstering her weapon and running the rest of the way up to Wynonna. She quickly knelt next to her, pulling out her small penlight and using it to light Wynonna’s face.

“Ma’am,” she tried, but Wynonna was out cold. Nicole pried open an eyelid and shined the light on her before putting the flashlight away. She pushed the button down on her shoulder mic and spoke into it. “Dispatch, this is Officer Haught. I have a downed civilian on the train tracks near Shorty’s. Can I get an ambulance please?”

“On the way, Officer Haught,” Linda from dispatch replied over the radio.

The blaring of a commuter train caught Nicole’s attention, and she looked down the tracks to see the headlight of one coming.

“Well...shit,” she said looking back at Wynonna’s unconscious form. She looked back at the train and estimated she had about a minute to get Wynonna off the tracks before they both became splattered on the side of a train.

“Wynonna,” Nicole tried, hand on Wynonna’s cheek. “Can you hear me?”

Nothing.

“And why...is your skin so soft?”

The train blared again.

“Okay, focus,” she chastised herself. “Wynonna! Wake up!”

Still nothing.

Nicole looked back up and the train was about thirty seconds away at this point and only getting closer.

“Wynonna! Can you move on your own?” Nicole tried once more. Wynonna, predictably, said nothing, so Nicole crouched next to her, lodged one arm under her head and one under her knees and lifted her bridal style. She wasn’t supposed to move an injured person, but it was either this or they both went boom.

Nicole managed to jog off of the tracks just in time as the train moved past them, buffeting Nicole forward a little. Nicole looked down at Wynonna’s face. So peaceful looking if Nicole didn’t know that she had just been punched in the face and probably had at least one concussion. It would have been very much like a fairytale. Except for the whole...Wynonna being out cold thing.

The sound of the emergency siren could be heard in the distance and Nicole carefully set Wynonna back on the ground. On safe ground where she wouldn’t get hit by a train. Nicole gently pushed some hair away from Wynonna’s face before shrugging off her coat and bundling it to put under Wynonna’s head like a pillow.

The cold winter air bit at Nicole’s skin through her uniform shirt, but she didn’t mind.

“Maybe I should have just talked to you,” Nicole said softly, stomach fluttering at how close she was to Wynonna. So close and she could stare unabashedly with her out like this. “Shae is really gonna tear me a new one for this,” she muttered to herself as the ambulance pulled up next to them.

***

Nicole followed the ambulance to the hospital. Was it a little above and beyond what she was supposed to do? Sure. But it was Wynonna. She couldn’t leave her alone. Even for a second. She wanted to make sure that Wynonna would be okay. It wasn’t a good hit to the head. Not that any hit to the head was, but this one seemed especially bad.

She haphazardly parked the cruiser behind the ambulance as they were taking Wynonna out on the gurney, and Nicole walked in beside it.

“Is she okay?” she asked one of the young paramedics.

They looked at her nervously. “It’s not great. But we can’t say much until the doctor sees her.”

“Shit,” Nicole said, reaching for Wynonna’s hand and squeezing it gently. She kept holding her hand, thumb brushing over her knuckles and marveling at how soft she was, when they wheeled her into the hospital. A doctor immediately met the gurney.

“What happened?” he asked as they started to walk towards a curtained area.

“Patient was hit in the face and hit their head on the train tracks,” the paramedic said.

Nicole just watched helplessly as the nurses came and swarmed the bed, taking Wynonna’s vitals and sticking her with things. The paramedics were soon gone but Nicole was still there holding Wynonna’s hand.

“Officer,” the doctor said stiffly, but not unkindly. “I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

“Oh, right,” Nicole said clearing her throat. “Sorry.” She squeezed Wynonna’s hand one last time before taking a step away from her. She looked at her one last time before ducking out of the working area. Wistfully...pathetically...she watched until one of the nurses closed the curtain. Nicole sighed and stuffed her hands in her jacket pockets.

“At least this will be a fun story to tell at our wedding,” Nicole mumbled to herself, not looking as she bumped into another nurse. “Oh, sorry, ma’am.”

The nurse looked up at her with big almost moony eyes and just squeaked. She had a comically large stuffed elf pinned to her shirt so it looked like the elf was riding on her shoulder. Nicole stared at it for far too long before looking back at the nurse. Nicole nodded politely at her and continued on her way.

***

Nicole went through her usual routine the next morning.

Brush her teeth. Put on the coffee. Feed Calamity Jane. Make a sad breakfast.

Well, Nicole didn’t consider it sad, she just considered it breakfast. But Shae always told her it was sad. Two pieces of toast and some scrambled eggs. It was filling and fortifying and Shae said it was the saddest thing she could imagine. She said it was a sad single person’s breakfast.

Again, Nicole just called it breakfast.

Usually after breakfast, Nicole would just go for a run and get her day started. But today she couldn’t concentrate and traded her morning run for a warm bath and getting dressed. And well...so what if she was going to go see Wynonna? She just wanted to see if she was awake. And if she was maybe she’d want to meet the officer who saved her from the tracks. At least it would be a better introduction than the one Nicole had the night before where she nearly choked to death on her bagel.

So Nicole went down to the hospital and up to the fourth floor where she knew Wynonna was. Nicole looked at the assignments board and muttered to herself. “Room 204.”

She continued down the hall, turning the corner where Wynonna’s room was. But when she got closer, she stopped in her tracks. There was a woman with short, grey hair sitting next to Wynonna’s bed. There was also a stockier man closer to the end of the bed who was looking at the two of them.

“Oops,” Nicole said, feeling like she’d been caught even if no one noticed her yet. She took a small step back when she bumped into someone. “Oh, sorry-”

When she turned around, she noticed it was the same nurse she had bumped into the night before. Still with that same stuffed elf safety-pinned to her shoulder.

“Oh! It’s you!” the nurse said, far more chipper than she had been the night before. “You’re Wynonna’s person!”

Nicole blinked for a moment, confused. “Um-”

“I’m Chrissy! I’ve known the Earps forever. I didn’t know Wynonna had a girlfriend!” Chrissy said, looping her arm with Nicole’s and walking her towards Wynonna’s room. She frowned, so confused that she couldn’t even talk in that moment as Chrissy continued. “Girlfriend, what am I saying. Fiancee! Right?”

“Um-” Nicole tried again. But Chrissy had practically shoved her into Wynonna’s room, the two visitors looking at her suspiciously.

“Gus, Shorty...do you know Officer…” Chrissy trailed off, waiting for Nicole to fill in the blank.

“Oh, um, Haught. Officer Haught,” Nicole said, reaching her hand out to shake both of their hands.

“Oh, are you the one who picked up Wynonna?” the woman Nicole presumed was Gus asked.

Nicole shrugged and couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, I’m the one who called the ambulance.”

“I could never thank you enough,” Gus continued.

“Just doing my duty, ma’am,” Nicole said modestly.

Chrissy gestured between Nicole and Wynonna. “Um, that’s not all, they’re engaged!”

Nicole felt all the blood drain from her face as she gaped at Chrissy, jaw practically on the floor. How could she-? Where-? Nicole sputtered but Gus gasped and Shorty looked just as shocked.

“Oh,” Nicole started, “I’m not-”

“Well, I’ll be damned,” Shorty said, standing up and immediately pulling Nicole into a hug. “I’ll be damned! We finally found the one to tame Wynonna! A police officer.”

“Um-”

Gus stood and shook her head, a fond smile on her face. “I was wondering if that girl would ever settle down.”

Nicole stood, shocked, as Shorty pulled away and clapped her on the shoulder. She blinked in shock momentarily and turned to Chrissy. “Can I speak with you? Outside?” she breathed.

“Oh, yeah!” Chrissy said with a concerned furrow of her brow. Nicole rushed outside the room with Chrissy and made sure the door was closed before she started.

“Chrissy! What the hell was that?” Nicole asked, wondering how a relative stranger just made her life a little more complicated. “Why do you think I’m getting married to Wynonna?”

Chrissy blinked at her with a confused shake of her head. “I heard you talking about how this would be a great story at your wedding.”

Nicole groaned and covered her face with her hands. “I was just being stupid. I don’t even know her.”

“Excuse me,” Chrissy said with a small laugh. “What?”

“I don’t know her. I just...awkwardly stare at her every night when she walks into Shorty’s on my graveyard shift,” Nicole explained. “I’ve barely had a conversation with her.”

“You talked about marrying her!” Chrissy squeaked.

“I’m stupid and love struck!” Nicole said running a hand through her hair. “A lonely gay!”

Chrissy blew her bangs out of her face and shook her head. “Man. Too bad they think you’re marrying her.”

“What do you mean?” Nicole asked. “I have to tell them the truth-”

“Oof, no you can’t,” Chrissy said solemnly. “I’ve never seen either of them that happy. Especially when it comes to Wynonna.”

“So what? You just want me to let them think we’re engaged?” Nicole asked incredulously.

Chrissy shrugged. “Well you can’t take away their joy now! Plus, have you ever been on the other side of the barrel of a pissed off Earp. That is not where you want to be.”

“I can’t lie! Someone’s bound to find out. And when Wynonna wakes up-”

“Listen,” Chrissy said, “I’m just saying that...maybe since it’s Christmas in a couple of days... Maybe you can let them be happy about something? Since their niece is in the hospital in a coma?”

Nicole looked over at them, dopey smiles still gracing their faces as they gazed at Nicole from inside the room. “I guess...you’re right,” Nicole groaned, fingers rubbing at her temples. “God, this is the worst idea.” She took a deep breath and looked back at Chrissy. Nicole suddenly recognized her as the Sheriff’s daughter and groaned. “Please don’t tell your dad this.”

Chrissy giggled. “Of course not. But now you owe me a favor.”

“Fine. Deal,” Nicole said looking back towards the hospital room. “I guess I should go...not be rude.”

“They are your future family after all,” Chrissy said with a wink.

Nicole groaned. “Thanks for all your help, Chrissy.”

“Anytime. Gotta jet,” she said moving past Nicole, leaving her in the hall trying to figure out how she was going to approach this situation. How did she get herself in this situation?

Nicole straightened out her shirt and took a deep breath before turning back towards Wynonna’s room. She smiled to Gus and Shorty as she walked into the room. With her best ‘officer of the law’ smile, she cleared her throat and croaked out, “It’s such a pleasure to finally meet you.”

Chapter Text

When Nicole went to the station later in the day, Lonnie headed straight for her desk. She fidgeted for a moment, hoping it hadn’t gotten back to him that she was pretending to be engaged to a coma patient.

“Hey Haught,” he said with a smile she supposed was meant to be charming. “I was wondering if you could pick up my Christmas shift.”

“I’m busy,” Nicole said flatly before taking a sip of her coffee.

Lonnie smiled even wider, seemingly trying to appeal to her in some way. “Come on, Haught, I have a family thing and you don’t-“

He stopped suddenly, clearing his throat as his eyes darted down to her desk where he absently tapped on the pens in a cup at the end. “You know.”

“You mean I don’t have anyone?” Nicole asked evenly, waiting for Lonnie to look back at her. He looked up at the ceiling instead and shrugged.

“I mean...yeah?”

Nicole sighed and looked over at the tiny Christmas tree she had put up on her desk. “Maybe,” she said turning back to her paperwork. “Ask me again tomorrow.”

“Good enough for me,” Lonnie said with an awkward thumbs up before he scurried back to his desk.

Nicole figured he had a point. She was just planning to sit at home and watch some movies. Listen to Christmas music and try not to be too miserable. It was what she did last year, and if she didn’t cry from understated loneliness then, she wasn’t planning on doing it this year.

She wondered what bothered her more. The idea of being alone, or that everyone knew she was alone for the holidays. Nicole looked back at the tiny tree on her desk and noticed one of the small ornaments had fallen off. She hung it back on the delicate branch and smiled to herself. Good enough.

***

Nicole went home that night and slumped onto the couch. Calamity, of course, found her way onto Nicole’s chest immediately, begging for food like she’d never eaten before in her life. According to the decibel of CJ’s meows, she was going to die of starvation at any moment. But Nicole just patted her head.

“You would not believe the day I had,” Nicole muttered to the cat. “Gus and Shorty are really nice though.”

CJ just nipped lightly at Nicole’s hand. A subtle warning that the cat would have no problem eating Nicole if she had to. There were no loyalties when she was starving.

“I guess I just feel bad lying to them,” Nicole said. “And what do we do when Wynonna wakes up?”

CJ meowed again, aggressively ramming her head into Nicole’s hand.

“You’re right. I have to end this. It’s stupid and dishonest,” Nicole said. “I’ll tell them tomorrow.”

Nicole went to sit up and CJ hopped down from her chest and made a beeline for her food bowl. It was their usual routine. Nicole would pour a bowl of food for CJ and then she’d throw something for herself in the microwave. Usually leftovers. Today it was Chinese and while it was heating up, she turned on the little Christmas tree she had put up for herself. The lights turning on never failed to make Nicole smile. She had a couple of ornaments from her grandmother but most of them she just picked up through the years.

She sighed and connected her phone to the speaker, putting on some Christmas music.

Another Christmas by herself wouldn’t be that bad, she reasoned. She had CJ and maybe after some light Lonnie torturing, she would pick up his shift. At least he had somewhere to be, she thought bitterly before the microwave beeped.

She took her container of Chinese food from the microwave, only dropping it once because the container was a little too hot for her liking. She shook her hand and took the food into the living room, CJ close on her heels and hoping for a stray noodle. Nicole turned on the television and left it on whatever Christmas movie was playing as she ate. This wasn’t sad, she reasoned. Just...normal. The normal life of a single person. With no friends. Or family.

Nicole sighed and gave CJ a noodle.

***

One thing that Nicole had noticed about the hospital was its lack of Christmas decor. Which she found abysmal. So she stopped by the store on her way to see Wynonna and grabbed just a couple of things. Especially since she knew Gus and Shorty had been spending a lot of time in the hospital and she figured it’d be nice.

Chrissy winked at her as she got out of the elevator. Nicole nodded politely at her and headed towards Wynonna’s room with an embarrassing number of bags in her hands. She was thankful that no one was in the room when she got there and gently closed the door behind her.

Wynonna looked as beautiful as ever, laying there with her dark hair fanning out on the pillow. Nicole smiled at her and pretended to tip a hat at her.

“Hey, Wynonna,” Nicole said, feeling just a little silly standing and staring at a girl who was sleeping, with bags of Christmas decorations in her hands. “I um...brought some things to jazz the place up a bit. You know how it is.”

The only answer in the room was the beeping of the machinery.

Nicole nodded and cleared her throat, setting the bags on the chairs.

“Guess I’ll just get started,” she said as she pulled tinsel out of the bag.

A while later, it looked like a Christmas decorations box had thrown up all over Wynonna’s room. She put tinsel all around Wynonna’s bed and cut out little Santas and snowmen all around the room. She even put a small tinsel tree on the bedside table.

Nicole stepped back in front of the door and put her hands on her hips to observe her work.

“Huh,” she said with a satisfied nod. “Not bad.”

“Not bad at all if I do say so myself,” came a voice from behind Nicole.

She jumped and spun quickly to see a handsome man standing there with a large mustache. Nicole cleared her throat and held out her hand.

“Hi,” she said. “I’m Nicole.”

“Nice to meet you, ma’am,” the man said taking off his hand and clutching it to his chest as he took her hand with the other hand. “My name is John Henry.” He squinted at her, a small smile apparent under his large mustache. “You must be Wynonna’s beau.”

Nicole blushed and rubbed the back of her neck. “Um-“

“Yes!” Gus said, having just walked into the hospital room. “So be nice, John Henry.”

“Now, Gus, you know I would not dream of being anything but polite,” John Henry said with a certain glint in his eyes that told Nicole that wasn’t entirely true.

Gus just hummed before pulling Nicole into a warm hug. She froze for a moment, shocked by the sudden affection before Gus shook her a little.

“Come on, sweetie. We’re the hugging type around here,” she said as Nicole slowly circled her arms around Gus. “Well, you and Wynonna must be a match made in heaven. I have just a hard a time gettin’ her to hug back too.”

When Gus pulled away, Nicole noticed Shorty and Curtis coming into the room and looking around.

“Oh um, hope you don’t mind. I thought I’d lighten up the place a bit,” Nicole said, gesturing to the decorations. “Is that okay?”

“Of course, dear!” Gus said as she walked over to Wynonna’s bed side. “Any word from the doctor about our girl yet?”

Curtis spoke up. “They said she’s making a fine recovery. Swelling’s almost down.”

Nicole breathed a small sigh of relief and looked back over at Wynonna, sleeping peacefully. Not a care in the world or an ounce of awareness that she was fake engaged to a woman she’d never met. The guilt seized at Nicole’s stomach again and she looked up to see Curtis eyeing her. She blushed and quickly looked away as she cleared her throat.

“I should...go,” she said, pointing her thumb towards the door as she slowly backed up towards it. “I have...work.”

Nicole smiled at all of them and thought she was home free when-

“Wait, Nicole,” Gus said as if she just remembered something. “You’re coming to dinner tonight, right?”

After a moment of complete shock, Nicole shook her head.

“Oh...no, I have...plans,” she lied through her teeth. She needed to keep as far of a distance as possible between her and Wynonna’s family. She didn’t want them to have more reason to hate her when they found out the truth.

Gus raised an eyebrow, seeing right through her horrible lie. “Plans?”

“Um...yes?” Nicole said, cursing the questioning lilt at the end of her sentence.

With a knowing smile, Gus pat her shoulder. “Well I’m sure you can find time to come over after your...plans. The house is on Elmwood. There’s a mailbox out front that says ‘Gibson’, you can't miss it.”

“Okay,” Nicole said with a small smile, slowly backing out of the room again. She awkwardly saluted them before turning on her heel, not missing the suspicious look that Shorty was giving her as she ducked out of the room.

She sighed in relief, eyes meeting Chrissy’s as she shuffled through some files haphazardly. Nicole raised an eyebrow at her and Chrissy not so subtly gestured with her head for Nicole to come over. She leaned against the counter as Chrissy continued to shuffle, despite how clearly she wasn’t paying attention to it.

“How’s it going?” Chrissy said, eyes flickering to Wynonna’s room. “With your lover.”

Nicole blushed at Chrissy’s teasing smile. “Fine. Thank you. And by fine I mean horrible because I’m lying to some perfectly nice people.”

“You’re not...lying,” Chrissy said. “You’re like...pretending. For Christmas.”

Nicole snorted and started to walk away. “Have a good night, Chrissy.”

“You too,” Chrissy said with an enthusiastic wave as Nicole got in the elevator.

***

“Is your lonely ass sitting at home again?” Shae asked, as soon as Nicole picked up the phone.

“I don’t know what you expect of me, Shae,” Nicole said as she plopped herself on the couch. CJ immediately found her lap, turning in a couple of circles before finally settling. Nicole could hardly hear Shae over her purring.

“I expect you to put yourself out there for the holidays,” she said.

Nicole scratched under CJ’s chin. “Well...I kinda did. On accident.”

“I can’t even begin to imagine what that means.”

“You know that...girl I told you about before?” Nicole said, scratching behind CJ’s ears. Shae just hummed in acknowledgement. “And about how she fell on the tracks and is in a coma?” Shae hummed again. “Did I mention that...herfamilythinkswe’reengaged?”

Nicole could hear Shae’s mind trying to separate her muddled words before she gasped. “Nicole Rayleigh Haught you’re pretending to be engaged to her?”

“No!” Nicole said in a knee jerk reaction before she sighed. “I mean-...yes. Kinda.”

“Kinda? How is this a ‘kinda’ situation?”

“I got roped into it! And her family is so sweet and they’d be devastated now if I told them that I lied and it’s almost Christmas and-“

“Okay okay,” Shae said calmly. “Okay just...this is really...odd.”

Nicole ran her fingers through CJ’s fur and sighed as she prepared herself. “One of the nurses thought I said I was engaged to her and she told the family before I could get a word in edgewise. And they were so sweet and welcoming and…” Nicole licked her lips, embarrassed to admit how she was actually...enjoying all of this a little bit. Not the lying, obviously, but the...having other people talk to her, ask her about her day...invite her to dinner.

“I don’t know,” Nicole continued. “It’s been nice to feel like...I have other people here.”

Shae sighed. “I get it, Nicole, but...aren’t you worried they’re going to be hurt when they find out?”

“Yeah,” Nicole admitted. “You know, they invited me over tonight. Maybe I should go over while they’re all there and...tell them the truth.”

“I guess that’s better than over their family member who’s in a coma,” Shae said.

“Probably,” Nicole grimaced. “I really made a mess for myself. I’m a horrible person.”

“Nicole, you’re not a horrible person,” Shae sighed. “You’re...an annoyingly good person actually. You just need to sort this whole thing out. And I know you will.”

“I hope so,” Nicole said mostly to herself.

There was a short silence over the phone before Shae spoke up again. “Okay, what are you going to take to this dinner?”

***

Nicole looked up at the house, a pumpkin pie from the local bakery cradled in her hands. The tip of her nose felt like it was about to fall off from the cold and she wondered how long she had been standing and staring. It only felt like a few moments but it could have been hours for all she knew. There was a big Christmas tree lit up in the window, lights being diffused by the sheer curtain over the window. Christmas lights lit up every edge of the roof and were twisted in the bushes to create something that looked like it could be right off the front of one of those quaint little Christmas cards you got at gift shops. The kind that only came five to a pack and for some reason were on obscenely thick paper. It looked like a dream.

One Nicole was not supposed to be a part of.

Standing there, halfway down the walkway, Nicole decided she was stupid.

“What are you doing, Haught?” she said under her breath before shaking her head and turning on her heels with every intention of marching straight back to her car and going home to eat the pie by herself.

“Nicole!” Shorty called from the front door.

Nicole groaned and turned around, forcing a small smile on her face. “Hey, Shorty.”

He smiled and closed the door gently behind him, gesturing for her to come to the porch. Nicole slowly made her way up, sitting next to him on the stairs.

“I thought I’d come out here for some fresh air,” Shorty said with a long groan.

Nicole smiled, pie balancing on her knees. “I get that.”

Shorty nodded. “I love every one of those people in there but they can be a lot sometimes,” he said with a chuckle. “Like every family I guess.”

The loneliness that was always in the pit of Nicole’s stomach morphed into sadness and she scratched at the edge of the pie tin. “I guess I don’t...know much about that,” Nicole said, clearing her throat. She could feel Shorty looking at her from his place besides her but she kept staring at the top of the pie instead. There were little leaves cut out of pie crust placed on the top as decoration, the edges of the pastry a warm brown.

“You know, before I met Gus I was a sad ol’ sonavabitch,” Shorty said. “My wife had just left me and I was so...mad at the world. But Gus and Curtis took me in. They made me part of the family despite all the times I tried to push them away. Now they’re more of a family than I could ever ask for.”

“That seems nice,” Nicole smiled.

“These here are good people,” Shorty said firmly, knowingly. “They’re my family now. And I will protect them if I think anyone is out to harm them.”

Nicole felt her stomach clench and she looked back over at Shorty who was looking at her intensely. She got nervous under his stare, face heating up despite the cold. It hadn’t quite snowed yet, even though it was late in the year. But if you concentrated hard enough you could smell. So now, sitting here in the cold with snow hiding deep somewhere in the clouds above them, Nicole was sure she had been caught.

“Um...I...would never want to hurt them either,” she said softly. “I don’t know them very well but I never meant-...I’m sorry, I-”

Shorty shook his head, putting his hand on Nicole’s shoulder to stop her rambling. He gave her a warm smile and she felt herself relax a little.

“Nicole, you’re a good kid,” Shorty said softly. “And I know you would never hurt anyone on purpose.”

“But...I lied-”

“Sometimes...a lie is told out of mercy,” Shorty said softly. “They didn’t even know Wynonna was back in town. Which is an impressive feat in Purgatory, to say the least. So Wynonna was trying to stay hidden. She’s always been distant and I think...if it wasn’t for you...with Wynonna purposefully avoiding them and her being in the hospital...I think it would have all been too much.”

Nicole nodded slowly, swallowing thickly. She had so many questions about Wynonna. All the days Nicole had been watching Wynonna, she made up her own little idea in her head about her life. Who her family was and what she did with her life. And now that the little pieces were coming into place, she was getting a clearer picture of the woman she was sure she had been in love with since the moment she laid eyes on her.

“I do care about her,” Nicole admitted softly. “I could never lie about that. I think I loved her from the moment I saw her.”

Shorty smiled widely and clapped Nicole on the back. “Wynonna would be lucky to have a good kid like you hitch their horse to her wagon. So to speak.”

The creaking sound of the door opening drew Nicole from her thoughts, and she looked back to see Gus poking her had out of the door. “Hey you two,” she said, wiping her hands on the apron around her waist. “What are you two doing out here? Trying to freeze your butts off?”

Nicole looked back at Shorty who just winked at Nicole before looking back at Gus.

“Just taking a minute to breathe,” Shorty said, groaning as he stood up from the porch. Nicole stood up with him, pie in her hands as she followed him into the house. She smiled at Gus and shrugged.

“I brought pie.”

Gus smiled widely. “I’m glad you’re here. We all are.”

Nicole’s chest filled with warmth, but she wasn’t sure if it was from the fire or something else.

***

The dinner started out a little awkwardly. For Nicole anyways. She tried to stay in corners and remain unnoticed. But that wasn’t the easiest thing to do when you were taller than everyone and boasted a shock of red hair in a sea of grey. Curtis asked her questions all night. At first it felt awkward talking about herself like that but soon the conversation was flowing.

It was only a matter of time before she felt at ease. But once she did, she couldn’t keep the smile off her face.

She’d had a few cups of eggnog and was definitely feeling it. Squinting at the clock, she groaned at the late time. She figured she could walk home but Gus had insisted that she sleep on the couch. And after a quick look at the temperature, Nicole agreed.

Gus let her borrow some of Wynonna’s old sweatpants and with a comfy thick blanket, Nicole fell asleep in no time. She probably would have slept through the entire night if the cocking of a shotgun didn’t wake her up in the middle of the night.

Nicole sat up on high alert, eyes wide and heart pounding in her ears as she looked down the barrel of the shotgun. Slowly her eyes focussed on the person behind the shotgun and saw a lithe, brown haired woman with hazel eyes squinting at her. The slight light from the Christmas tree illuminated her profile and...particularly the Christmas sweater she was wearing. It was green with twelve reindeer on it, each with its own puffball nose and set of sequin eyes. The adorable-ness of the sweater certainly brought down the intimidation factor of the shotgunned woman.

“Hello?” Nicole said, hands up at her sides in surrender.

“Who are you and why are you in my living room?” the other woman asked.

“Obviously I broke into your home just to sleep on your couch,” Nicole couldn’t help but say.

The other woman looked even angrier, finger tightening on the trigger.

“Do you have a death wish or something?” she asked.

Nicole managed a smile. “Nicole Haught. Purgatory Sheriff Department. I’m here on an invitation from Gus. And you are?”

“Waverly Earp,” she said, shotgun still trained carefully on Nicole. Nicole’s mind clicked and she remembered. Waverly Earp. Wynonna’s sister she could tell based on the little things around town she had heard when she did some light investigating on Wynonna. That and the fact that she seemed to be a town darling. At the very mention of her name, people’s faces would light up.

“Waverly, why are you threatening our guest?” Gus said, voice carrying from up the stairs as she slowly made her way down.

Waverly blushed and lowered the shotgun. Nicole breathed a small sigh of relief even if Waverly was still looking at her suspiciously.

“Sorry, Gus,” Waverly said, finally looking at the older woman. “I was just a little shocked to see someone on our couch.”

Nicole watched in fascination as Waverly’s entire body language changed. Her shoulders relaxed, face softened as a warmness surrounded her that wasn’t there a few moments before.

“This is your sister’s fiance, show some respect,” Gus said, planting a teasing kiss on Waverly’s cheek. Her head jerked back towards Nicole, eyes hardened again.

“She’s Wynonna’s fiance?” Waverly said dubiously. “Wynonna never mentioned...anyone.”

Nicole sat up from the couch slowly, running a hand through her messy hair. Gus sighed. “Yeah. And when’s the last time you talked to her?”

Waverly shifted awkwardly, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Few months ago. When she...left a message that she was going to Greece.”

“So you didn’t know she was here either,” Gus said mostly to herself.

Waverly turned back to Nicole whose eyes got wide at the look.

“When is Wynonna’s birthday?” she asked.

Nicole thought back to her medical chart. “September twelfth.”

“Favorite drink?”

Nicole remembered the smell on her breath when she rescued her off the tracks and made a guess. “Whiskey.”

Waverly hummed. “Pet?”

“She has no pet.”

“Waves, can you stop interrogating Nicole please?” Gus asked, patting her on the shoulder a little roughly. “Let me make you some tea and we can talk all about your classes.”

Nicole attempted to smile at Waverly but she was sure it came across as a grimace more than anything. Waverly’s eyes remained trained on her as she disappeared into the kitchen with Gus. Nicole let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. So that was Wynonna’s sister. A cute sister. A cute sister that was already suspicious and probably hated Nicole.

That was her cue to leave.

Nicole slipped back into the restroom and splashed some water on her face. She put her jeans back on and folded the sweatpants up with the intention of taking them home to wash and bring back to them.

She walked back out to see Waverly and Gus back in the living room, both cradling cups of tea. They hadn’t noticed her yet and Nicole found herself taken in by the wide smile on Waverly’s face. Her eyes were crinkled at the corners from the force of her smile, honey brown hair pulled up and out of her face except for a few strands hanging against her cheeks.

The lights from the Christmas tree reflected in Waverly’s eyes and it made Nicole practically gape in wonder.

“I don’t know,” Waverly said, voice quieting. “It’s just weird that we didn’t know Wynonna was engaged, isn’t it?”

“Well she doesn’t tell us much of anything, does she?” Gus said, voice wounded. “She didn’t even tell us she was in town.”

It wasn’t until Waverly turned and looked at Nicole that she realized she had stopped breathing. She quickly cleared her throat and smiled widely at the two.

“I’m going to head out, but thank you again, Gus, for having me over,” Nicole said. “I’ll um....see you later.”

“Are you going to go see Wynonna later?” Gus asked.

Nicole couldn’t bring herself to say no, so she smiled instead and nodded her head. “I’ll be there.”

***

After work, Nicole wandered into the hospital still in her uniform. As soon as she stepped foot onto Wynonna’s floor, Chrissy was shoving a plastic baggy into her hands.

“What’s this?” Nicole asked, peering in. She was met immediately with a pair of lacy red underwear and shut the bag quickly, face the same color as the underwear.

“Wynonna’s effects,” Chrissy said with a knowing smile. “Thought I’d hand them off to you.”

“Why me?” Nicole asked, tips of her ears still burning.

“You’re her fiance,” Chrissy said matter-of-factly.

Nicole shoved the bag back at her. “You of all people know that’s not true.”

“Know what’s not true?” Gus said as she came up to the two of them, seemingly out of nowhere.

“Um,” Nicole offered uselessly, eyes wide.

“I was just teasing her and telling her that someone took all the Christmas decorations in Wynonna’s room down,” Chrissy offered with a sweet smile.

Gus just looked at her for a moment before looking back at Nicole. “I assure you that’s not true,” she said with a nod. “But actually, do you mind going to...wherever Wynonna was staying? The insurance is giving us an issue and we need her last known address. I figured it might be written on something.”

“Oh, sure,” Nicole said, internally panicking. “I’ll go to where she was staying because...I definitely know where that is.”

“Great!” Gus said. “I’ll see you in a bit then.”

Gus turned and walked back towards Wynonna’s room while Nicole and Chrissy just looked at each other for a moment.

“Well...fuck,” Nicole said. “How am I supposed to find where she stayed?”

Chrissy grabbed the bag back from Nicole and looked through it for a moment before holding up a hotel key triumphantly. “I saved you, Haught.”

“More like got me in this situation to begin with,” Nicole said snatching the key from her. “But thank you.”

Chrissy winked at her. “You’re welcome.”

***

Nicole pulled up to the motel that was printed on the little tag of the key. The parking lot of the low slung building was fairly empty except for a motorcycle in front of Wynonna’s room, next to a red Jeep. Nicole pulled up next to the Jeep, inspecting it carefully before looking at Wynonna’s door that was slightly ajar.

“That’s...odd,” Nicole said, quietly getting out of the cruiser. She undid the strap of her holster and drew her pistol, holding it down in front of her as she approached the door of the room.

The whole thing reeked of a breaking and entering situation. Especially when Nicole noticed abent hairpin sticking from the keyhole. Someone had definitely jimmied the door open.

Nicole pushed the door open, grateful it didn’t creak as she stepped inside, gun first. She looked around the room and saw a few drawers pulled out and some things scattered on the bed but not much else. She heard movement in the bathroom and took a couple of steps forward to get a peek inside.

Inside the bathroom was Waverly, with her light brown hair and in a skirt that was much too short for the weather. Nicole sighed in relief and put her gun back in the holster. Waverly wasn’t an immediate threat but that was no reason not to mess with her a little bit. Not after she pointed a gun at Nicole just this morning.

“Hands up! Purgatory Sheriff!” Nicole shouted in the most authoritative voice she could muster.

Waverly jumped, dropping the jewelry box she was holding and letting it clatter onto the sink. She held her hands up and slowly turned to face Nicole. When Waverly saw who it was, her face turned from shocked to annoyed, the hands she had up in the air dropping a little.

“Seriously?” Waverly said.

Nicole shrugged, thumbs tucked into her belt. “Well, you arex breaking and entering,” she pointed out with a crooked smile.

“This is my sister’s room,” Waverly pointed out.

“You have to admit, it looks pretty suspicious that you felt the need to use a bobby pin to break in if it’s your sister,” Nicole said, still with a teasing smile on her face.

Waverly rolled her eyes and tilted her head. “Well, are you going to arrest me or can I put my hands down?”

Nicole made a show of putting her hand on the handcuffs at her side. Waverly’s eyes got wide at the gesture, fear apparent in her face before Nicole dropped her hand. “Guess you can get off with a warning.”

“You’re mean, Nicole Haught,” Waverly huffed, hands dropping at her sides. “Plain mean.”

“Hilarious I think is the word you’re looking for,” Nicole teased.

Waverly shot her a look and quickly turned her back to the jewelry box, setting it upright. “I just came to look for...some clues. As to why Wynonna would-...”

“To what? Why your sister would be engaged to a cop?” Nicole asked, eyebrow raised.

“If you knew Wynonna, you’d know a cop would be the last person she shacked up with,” Waverly pointed out.

“Or...maybe the exact person she would,” Nicole said. She remembered seeing the Earp name all over the Sheriff Department and asked. “Wasn’t your dad the Sheriff?”

Waverly crossed her arms in front of her chest. “Yeah. Daddy was a lawman,” Waverly said, looking Nicole up and down for a moment. “It killed him.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Nicole said, ducking her head a little.

Waverly shrugged. “It’s all in the past...as I’m sure you know,” Waverly said pointedly.

Nicole nodded, face tinting. She quickly changed the subject. “I just came here to get Wynonna’s previous address.”

“Shouldn't you know it? If you two were so close or whatever,” Waverly said, clearly thinking she had the upperhand in the situation.

“I’m sure you know as well as I do that Wynonna didn’t like to talk about her past.”

Waverly just grunted in acknowledgement and gestured towards the bed. “She has some old mail there.”

“Thank you,” Nicole drawled, dipping the brim of a hat she didn’t have.

Waverly smiled a little. “You’re a regular cowgirl, aren’t you?”

Nicole smiled and purposefully over accentuated her drawl, “Well, ma’am, I had been known to play the cowgirl back in the day. And I ain’t half bad at ridin’.”

They both blushed, Waverly raising an eyebrow at her as she suppressed a small giggle. “I bet you aren’t,” she said, tucking some hair behind her ear. Nicole found her eyes following the way Waverly’s fingers curled behind her ear and ran along the side of her face for a moment. Nicole quickly looked away and held up the envelope with Wynonna’s old address on it.

“I’m going to um...go back to the hospital,” Nicole said.

“I’ll follow you,” Waverly said, walking past Nicole towards the door of the hotel. Nicole couldn’t help but notice that Waverly smelled...really nice. Like flowers and sunshine. She shook her head and followed Waverly out the door, pretending she didn’t take a small look at her ass as she walked.

Chapter Text

When Nicole got to Wynonna’s room the next morning, no one was there yet. She relaxed a little, relieved, walking over to the side of the bed and sitting in the chair there.

“Hey, Wynonna,” Nicole said softly, taking the beanie off of her head and setting it in her lap. “It’s nice to see you.”

Wynonna, of course, said nothing. But Nicole felt awkward just the same. She sighed and reached forward, putting her hand over Wynonna’s. Squeezing gently, Nicole marveled at how soft Wynonna’s hands were. She looked up at her face and was amazed with how...peaceful she was. It just looked like she was sleeping.

She thought about Waverly and Gus...Curtis.

“I’m sorry,” Nicole said gently. “I’m sorry I’ve let this get...out of hand. I promise I never meant for this to happen. I’ve just been...so damn lonely. And your family has been so nice. I don’t know why you’d run away from this. Though...I guess we all have our reasons for these things.”

Nicole tilted her head to the side and rubbed her thumb over the back of Wynonna’s hand.

“But I am sorry. I hope that...when you wake up, you can forgive me.”

There was a knock on the doorframe and Shorty was standing there leaning against the frame. Nicole jumped, hand on her heart as she took a calming breath.

“Jesus, Shorty,” she said, blushing when she remembered how she was holding Wynonna’s hand. Shorty shrugged and wandered into the room.

“See, I had you pegged. “I always know a lonely soul when I see one.”

Nicole blushed and leaned back in her chair. “I just-”

“No need to explain yourself,” Shorty said on the other side of Wynonna’s bed. “And I also need you to stop trying to apologize, okay?”

“I’ll do my best,” Nicole mumbled, looking back at Wynonna.

“Besides,” Shorty said with a small smile. “It’s Christmas. We can all do with a little hope right now. Maybe this is a fun story to tell your kids some day. You and Wynonna.”

Nicole blushed. “If she doesn’t hate me when she wakes up.”

Shorty shrugged. “Maybe...this whole thing has nothing to do with Wynonna. Maybe you were meant to meet someone else.”

“Guess we’ll find out,” Nicole said.

Shorty chuckled, “I can’t wait.”

***

Nicole was patrolling the next day, driving along the outskirts of town when she noticed a familiar red Jeep pulled over on the side of the road. She pulled up next to it and frowned, craning her neck to see that no one was in it.

“Weird,” she said to herself, looking at the tire tracks and footsteps outside of the car and slowly pulling her foot off the brake. Inching the car carefully forward, Nicole kept her eyes on the footprints until she passed over a small hill and saw exactly who was leaving them.

Nicole smiled to herself to see Waverly walking down the side of the road, bundled up in a thick jacket, scarf, and earmuffs as she went. She felt a little giddy at the idea of teasing her a little, admittedly. So she let her siren ‘whoop’ once just to watch Waverly jump a little bit. She turned and shot Nicole a look when she saw who it was. Nicole rolled down her window and let her car roll beside Waverly.

“Howdy, ma’am,” Nicole teased, smile on her face. “Need a ride?”

Waverly kept walking. “I’m fine. I’m almost there.”

Nicole looked around at the empty landscape around them and looked back towards Waverly. “And where exactly are you going? The middle of a field?”

“No,” Waverly said quickly. “I’m going to...the family home.”

“And you’re sure I can’t give you a ride?” Nicole tried again. “It’s kinda cold out.”

Waverly stopped short and Nicole’s car bounced as she hit the brakes hard. Waverly turned to look at her. “Fine.”

“Thank you,” Nicole said with a playful smile as Waverly moved around to the other side of the car and slid in. “It would be my pleasure.”

Making some kind of nondescript noise, Waverly settled into her seat and looked out the window.

“It’s just a few miles down the road and there’s a little trail. I’ll point it out,” she said simply. Nicole just nodded and turned the radio up a little bit. Just enough to fill the silence of the car but not enough to drown out the chatter over her police radio just in case a call came through.

She tapped her fingers on the driver’s wheel to the beat of the music and tried not to think about Waverly sitting besides her. She was so...distracting. With her soft looking hair and pink lips. Nicole blushed and shifted in her seat. This was not the time to think about how cute the other woman was. Not when she clearly was annoyed with Nicole, who was also fake-engaged to her sister in a coma.

A pang of guilt took hold of Nicole’s stomach at the thought of how she was lying to Waverly. She could already see through Nicole, she would probably definitely kill her if she found out. When she found out.

“I’ll tow your car to the garage later if you want,” Nicole said, desperate to fill the silence and distract herself from her own thoughts. “Or just back to Gus’. I can take a look at it for you.”

“You know something about cars then?” Waverly asked, still looking out the window.

Nicole shrugged. “One time there was um...there was this girl I had a crush on and her car was a piece of shit so...I learned some basic car stuff to impress her.”

Waverly looked at Nicole with a smug smile. “Seriously?”

“Yes,” Nicole said, only slightly embarrassed. “Listen, a girl will do a lot for another girl. It’s...part of being gay.”

Waverly snorted. “I never did anything stupid for a boy. Or a girl for that matter.”

Nicole’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline at the confession but she managed to keep her eyes on the road. “Well, that’s probably because it was boys doing stupid stuff for you. And...girls.”

There was silence for a moment before Waverly spoke again. “I mean, one time a girl confessed that she got special permission to take classes not in her major to spend more time with me.”

“See, I told you,” Nicole said with a shake of her head. “You’re the pretty girl that makes other people do stupid things just to be closer to you.”

“What? No,” Waverly scoffed, finally turning to look at Nicole.

Nicole shrugged and grinned wider. “I’m just saying.” She looked over just in time to see Waverly blush before she looked back out the window.

“Oh, turn here!” Waverly said, pointing to a path that jutted off to the side of the road.

She did as she was told and the rest of the drive went in silence until they pulled up to an old, boarded up house. There was a broken mailbox in the front, ‘EARP’ written on the side. It lay next to a broken fence and small bridge that led to the front of the property. Nicole pulled up and peered out the windshield at the old house.

“Wow.”

“Yeah, it needs a little work,” Waverly said, getting out of the car. “Thanks for the ride.”

“Wait,” Nicole said, quickly fumbling open her door and bounding from the car. “I can’t just...leave you here.”

“Sure you can,” Waverly said matter of factly.

Nicole shook her head. “How are you going to get back?”

“I’ll walk.”

“It’s freezing.”

“Then I’ll call Gus.”

Nicole sighed and folded her arms on the top of the roof, resting her chin on her arms as she looked at Waverly. “I’ll leave if you want me too...but I’m just saying that I don’t mind waiting for you to be done doing...whatever it is you’re gonna do here.”

Waverly tried to mimic Nicole’s stance, but she was a little too short so she had to hop up on her tiptoes to make it work. “Why are you so determined to stay here?”

Nicole shrugged. “To get to know you,” she said easily. A little too easily. She cleared her throat. “You know...with the engagement and all.”

Just the words coming out of her mouth felt weird.

Waverly sighed and squinted at Nicole. “Fine. I just wanted to take stock of everything that needs to be done here.”

“Planning on moving back?” Nicole asked as Waverly pushed off the car and walked up to the porch.

Waverly opened the front door almost cautiously, poking her head inside as Nicole followed her up the porch.

“Maybe,” she said. They both walked in and Nicole took a look around as Waverly flitted about the house. It looked like someone had just up and left one day without really packing. There was a pot on the stove, some boxes of cereal on top of the fridge with holes chewed into the sides, cereal long gone thanks to mice. Half burned logs still rested in the fireplace and a book sat open on a nearby chair, spine up, like someone had left it there with the intention of coming back shortly after.

Nicole noticed some pictures on the mantel and walked over to them, brushing cobwebs off the top of a frame. The photo looked like the typical mall photo, mother and father posing behind three young girls, the youngest being maybe one, sitting on the middle girl’s lap. The mom looked almost exactly like an older Waverly.

She recognized Wynonna as the middle child, but frowned at the older girl.

“You have another older sister?” Nicole asked as Waverly came back down the stairs. Waverly didn’t answer, just walked up to Nicole and stood besides her to look at the same photo.

“Had,” Waverly said quietly. “She...died when Daddy died.”

“Oh, I’m sorry-”

“Doesn’t matter,” Waverly said, turning quickly and heading back to the door. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah sure,” Nicole said, taking one last look at the girls in the picture frame before following Waverly back to the patrol car.

***

Nicole towed the Jeep back to Gus’ house. As Nicole was undoing the Jeep from the towbar, Waverly walked back out of the house with Shorty close behind.

“Um, Nicole, do you mind driving me into town?” Waverly mumbled, seemingly put out for having to request it. “Curtis wants me to grab some stuff. I can find a ride back-”

“Why don’t you and Nicole grab this stuff together?” Shorty suggested. “Get to know each other a little better.”

Nicole looked at Shorty who had a wide grin on his face as he winked at her. Nicole looked back at Waverly who looked like she’d rather walk through a blizzard than spend more time than necessary with Nicole. But she couldn’t just...leave her.

“I mean...my shift is done for the day,” Nicole said, voice trailing off as she stood up from where she was kneeling in front of her car. She shrugged and rubbed the back of her neck. “I can be your chauffeur for the day.”

“I don’t-”

“See! Perfect,” Shorty interrupted, clapping Waverly’s shoulder lightly.

Nicole put on her most charming smile as Waverly walked towards the cruiser, her grumpy look made cuter by the fuzzy earmuffs she had over her ears. Nicole even opened the passenger door for her.

“I can open my own door,” Waverly huffed as she slid in.

“My mistake,” Nicole said as she closed the door. Her eyes landed back on Shorty who had a shit eating grin on his face. Nicole frowned at him as she walked over to her side of the car and got in. “So, where to?”

***

Waverly smirked as Nicole carried the deceptively heavy box of Christmas decorations to the car.

“I told you I would help,” Waverly said, opening the car door as Nicole dropped the box on the seat, then collapsed on top of it. “But nooooooo.”

“I was trying to be chivalrous,” Nicole gasped, taking the beanie off her head and wiping her forehead as she stood up.

“Well, I’m glad that worked out for you,” Waverly said, closing the car door and pulling the list from her pocket. She checked the item off the list and nodded, the end of her pen finding its way to her mouth as she thought. “What if we go to the mall outside of town first then we can get the Christmas tree on the way home.”

Nicole frowned and leaned against the car. “Gus already has a Christmas tree.”

Waverly shot her a look. “A couple of days before Christmas, we go find the saddest tree that won’t get a home and adopt it.”

Nicole couldn’t help the slow smile that was spreading on her face if she tried.

“That’s adorable.”

“Shut it, Haught,” Waverly said as she walked to the other side of the car and got in. Nicole just chuckled and got in the driver’s side, turning on the car and blasting the heat.

“What are we getting at the mall?” Nicole asked, trying to stir up some conversation.

Waverly hummed as she pulled out the list again. “Gus seems to think she needs a new baking dish for Christmas dinner and Curtis wants a few things.”

“Will you help me pick out a Christmas gift for Gus while we’re there?” Nicole asked shyly. “I just...want it to be good and I don’t know what to get her.”

“If this is about impressing Gus, you don’t have to,” Waverly said. “She’s already pretty smitten with you, you know.”

Nicole turned to look at Waverly in surprise. “She is?”

Waverly raised an amused eyebrow at Nicole. “Don’t be too smug about it.”

“Hard not to be.”

“Suck up,” Waverly mumbled with a teasing smile. Nicole smiled back, unable to help herself at the sight of Waverly’s smile. There was a flutter in her chest at the way Waverly’s eyes crinkled at the corners when she smiled. It was...disarming. To say the least.

She quickly turned back to the road and cleared her throat, turning up the radio as they drove to the mall. Maybe the silence was okay after all.

***

“What about this one?” Nicole asked, pointing at a baking dish that had a little bird painted delicately on the inside.

Waverly cocked her head to the side. “She’s just baking in it. She doesn’t need it to be nice.”

“It’s cute,” Nicole argued as Waverly picked up a much more understated one.

“This one isn’t as flashy,” Waverly said, turning the red dish over to check the price. “And it’s on sale.”

“It’s boring,” Nicole said, bending and leaning a little closer to Waverly. “But if that’s what you think she’d like then go for it.”

“I do think she would,” Waverly said, tucking the dish under her arm.

The mall was bustling with people as was expected on the day before Christmas Eve. Even if bustling felt too quaint of a word to describe the crowds of people at the mall. It seemed like all of Purgatory and the surrounding towns had descended on the mall to run around chaotically and get last minute gifts. Holiday decorations were on every spare surface of the store, Christmas music pumping through the overhead speakers on an endless loop. Even the employees with their best put-on smiles looked like they were on a loop of ‘Happy Holidays! Can I help you find something?’ to the point that it sounded robotic.

Nicole and Waverly walked out of the kitchen section of the department store and started towards the women’s section, weaving in and out of the frantic shoppers.

“So what are you studying in school?” Nicole asked, hands stuffed deep in her pockets as she shuffled along. Her winter coat and Waverly’s were gone, long stuffed in the bag they had gotten at the sporting goods store when they had fetched Curtis’ new snow boots. Nicole wasn’t exactly sure why he needed them that day but she had a suspicion that Shorty was just trying to keep them as busy together as possible. Nicole had rolled up the sleeves of her uniform and Waverly was sporting another festive looking sweater. This one was just blue and fluffy with sparkles over it.

“Ancient languages,” Waverly said far too casually. Nicole did a double take to look at the tiny force of a woman besides her. Who apparently was...beautiful and ridiculously smart. Nicole’s stomach clenched as she remembered Wynonna. They weren’t...actually together. But it still felt weird to be developing a crush on her little sister. Even if she seemed to still dislike Nicole.

“Ancient languages?” Nicole said with a shake of her head. “You make it sound so easy.”

Waverly shrugged as someone bumped into her coming off the escalator, knocking her a little into Nicole. Their bare arms brushed and Nicole felt electricity shoot up her spine. Nicole tried to play it off, using her hand hovering over Waverly’s lower back to steady as she caught herself.

“I mean...it’s kind of not your typical major, is it?” Waverly said. “Every time I say it people just ask what I plan on doing with it.”

“Well...what do you plan on doing after college?” Nicole couldn’t help but ask.

“Who knows. Not like it matters when Purgatory is a bit of a boring town anyways. It didn’t matter what I got my degree in, I’m always going to come back to the same job,” Waverly said.

“What job is that?” Nicole pried.

“Waitress at Shorty’s. Slinging drinks for the same people I went to high school with,” she mumbled.

“If you could do whatever you wanted, what would it be?”

“I...don’t know.”

“The girl who’s told me her major is ancient languages is trying to tell me she doesn’t have grand dreams of something else?” Nicole said, knocking lightly into Waverly.

Waverly chuckled and leaned back into Nicole, making her heart alight.

“Travel. I’d just want to...travel. And become a professor at an old university,” Waverly whispered, wrinkling her nose like it was a secret. She got more excited, her hands moving and gesturing wildly as she talked. “Like really old. The kind where you can smell the mildew everywhere and there’re vines crawling up the walls. Like...Cambridge or something.”

Nicole couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm and the way her hands moved so expressively. She could watch her talk for...far longer than friendly.

“That sounds amazing,” Nicole said, forcing herself to look away from Waverly. “You should...do that.”

“I can’t,” Waverly admitted, something like embarrassment tinting her cheeks. “Not with...Gus and Shorty running the bar on their own and...Wynonna being back. I’ll just...come back here and hang my degree on the wall. That’ll be how much use it gets.”

“You shouldn’t say that,” Nicole said, immediately worried she might have overstepped a line. But Waverly just shrugged so Nicole continued. “I think you can get plenty of use out of it if you wanted.”

“If you’re so smart, did you always want to be a cop?” Waverly asked.

Nicole rubbed the back of her neck. “Kinda, yeah,” she said. “My parents were...odd. In a weird way they unintentionally pushed me into this life.”

Waverly chuckled and lightly elbowed Nicole. “Well, they must be proud, huh? With their daughter being a cop and all?”

“Nah,” Nicole said dismissively. “We...don’t really talk anymore.”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Waverly’s head turn towards her. In a desperate attempt to keep Waverly from asking about her past, Nicole veered off into the racks of clothing. Particularly the racks holding some of the more horrifying holiday sweaters Nicole has ever seen.

She picked a random one up and held it up in front of her. She turned to Waverly with a smile and wiggled her eyebrows.

“What do you think?”

Waverly snorted. “That’s hideous.”

“Isn’t that the point?”

Waverly fixed Nicole with a look and shook her head. “No way.”

Nicole looked down at the sweater she was holding up. Some kind of crazy mix of green and red to the point that it almost looked grey. There were two wreaths over where her breasts were which made the very mature part of Nicole giggle.

“I think it’s probably your best choice,” Nicole said all too seriously as she held it up in front of Waverly. She took the sweater from Nicole’s hand and hung it back on the rack.

“No way,” Waverly said.

“Come on! It’s fun!” Nicole said picking it back up off the rack. “It’s kinda like the reindeer one you were wearing the other day.” Waverly slapped Nicole’s arm and she jumped in surprise. “Ow!”

“My reindeer sweater is cute, thank you very much,” Waverly said. She gestured to the sweater in Nicole’s hands. “Not like this monstrosity.”

“It was cute because it was on you,” Nicole clarified before she thrust the sweater back up against Waverly’s frame. “Just like this one would be.”

Waverly blushed, smile faltering as she looked up at Nicole. She felt her breath catch in her throat when hazel eyes bored into her. Was it wrong to think Waverly was beautiful? Was it wrong to want to reach out and tuck the loose strand of hair behind her ear or lean forward and-

“You’re sweet,” Waverly said softly before seemingly catching herself, shaking her head and breaking their eye contact. She took the sweater back from Nicole, their fingers brushing ever so slightly but still enough to make Nicole’s skin crave more. Waverly put the sweater back on the rack. “Come on, let’s pay for this and get out of here.”

Nicole thought about going back to her house and sitting alone, just staring at the Christmas tree with CJ on her lap. Alone. She didn’t want to go home yet and...furthermore she didn’t want to leave Waverly yet. That particular thought that flooded her with guilt.

She wasn’t supposed to be falling for Waverly. Not with her fake fiancée sitting in the hospital in a coma. Wynonna may be her fake fiancée, but as far as everyone else was concerned, they were actually engaged. Nicole felt like she had betrayed Wynonna too, but that guilt was easier to push away.

“We can’t leave without some gross mall food first,” Nicole reasoned, following Waverly’s out of the racks and towards the register. “I’ll buy you a pretzel.”

“I’m vegan,” Waverly pointed out.

Nicole smiled. “Ambitious in a small town. Okay then let me get you a...coffee or something.”

Waverly turned suddenly and stopped in her tracks. She turned so quickly that Nicole knocked into her, unable to stop in time. Waverly squinted up at her suspiciously.

“Why are you being so nice to me?”

“Maybe I’m just a nice person?” Nicole tried unconvincingly.

Waverly squinted even harder. “Wynonna doesn’t usually pick nice ones.”

“Maybe she needed a change of pace-“

“Why do you want to spend time with me?” Waverly said, continuing her interrogation.

Nicole’s mouth closed and opened like a fish, her mind rushing to find an answer that didn’t involve, ‘I don’t know I might...kinda...totally be developing a crush on you’.

“I just...I don’t know. You’re...fun to spend time with,” Nicole said, tips tilting in the smallest smile. Waverly turned, probably trying to hide her blush as she finished the walk to the register.

As she turned around, Nicole heard the smallest confession of: “Yeah. You’re alright too.”

***

After a lot of prodding, Nicole finally got Waverly to go get them a seat in the small coffee shop in the mall while she got them drinks. She stopped at the nearby pretzel stand and got them a pretzel too, at least after confirming that they were vegan friendly.

She was sure she looked ridiculous, balancing two cups and a stupidly large pretzel in her hands. Sighing in relief as she got to the table, she set Waverly’s tea in front of her before plopping herself into the chair across from her.

“It’s vegan,” Nicole said, spreading out a napkin and setting the pretzel on it between them. “I checked.”

“Oh,” Waverly said, looking a little shocked. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Nicole said, playing it off with a shrug. “It’s just a pretzel but-“

“No, it’s just-...people don’t usually...bother checking for these things,” Waverly confessed, breaking off a piece. “One time I went on a date and I told the guy I was vegan and he took me to a steak place.”

Nicole snorted and took a sip of her coffee. “Well, boys are stupid. Did you even find anything you could eat?”

Waverly laughed, “I had a baked potato. With just salt and pepper and vegetables.”

Nicole rolled her eyes and reached for some of the pretzel herself. “I’m sorry that happened.”

“It’s fine. I’m used to it,” Waverly said holding the tea between her hands as if she was warming them. She stared at Nicole unabashedly, like she was trying to figure out some sort of puzzle. Nicole shifted uncomfortably and spoke through a mouth of pretzel without thinking.

“Wha?”

“You just...don’t seem like Wynonna’s...type,” Waverly said delicately.

Nicole blushed like she’d been caught, stomach twisting as she tried to play it off. “What is...Wynonna’s type?”

“Weird. Complicated,” Waverly said. “No commitment.”

If possible, the blush got deeper and Nicole searched for an answer. She figured a ‘that makes sense since I’m not really with your sister’ didn’t suffice.

“You never know, maybe I am,” Nicole said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Waverly raised her eyebrow at Nicole as she sipped her tea. “You definitely don’t seem like the dark and broody type.”

“I could be if I wanted to be,” Nicole argued.

“If you were truly dark and broody than you wouldn’t be saying that,” Waverly pointed out. Nicole squirmed a little under Waverly’s gaze and sipped her own drink, just for something to do.

Leaning forward on her elbows, Waverly’s lips tilted into a smile. Like she knew she had Nicole trapped in some way. It sent a thrill down Nicole’s spine, settling deep in her belly. Nicole’s eyes darted down to Waverly’s lips subconsciously and she felt her throat close a little. She licked her lips and looked down at her hands for a moment, the silence between them stretching and finally forcing Nicole to speak.

“Yeah, well I used to be,” Nicole finished lamely. “You know. High school.”

“I wouldn’t know. I was a cheerleader,” Waverly smiled with a small, proud twist to her shoulders.

Nicole’s grin only grew. “A cheerleader, huh?”

Waverly blushed but kept her eyes on Nicole. “Yes. And before you ask, I still have the uniform.”

“What makes you think I was gonna ask that?”

“Most people usually do,” Waverly said a little flirtatiously. “And yes, it still fits.”

“Oh, so you’ve tried it on recently?” Nicole teased, leaning forward on her elbows to match Waverly’s posture. “Got a lucky boyfriend?”

“No boyfriend.”

“Girlfriend?”

“Nicole Haught, are you flirting with me?” Waverly said lowly, a small sparkle in her eye. Nicole’s smile only grew, making sure it was wide enough for her dimple to pop. She’d noticed that made girls smile just that little bit harder.

“If you have to ask I’m not doing that good of a job,” Nicole said without thinking. Waverly’s eyebrows shot up into her hairline and she took a sip of her tea trying to hide the smile on her face. Nicole smiled even wider at Waverly’s response before it hit her like a ton of bricks.

Wynonna.

Her smile fell and Waverly’s faltered in the same moment. As Waverly’s cup went back to the table, her eyes followed and Nicole looked down at her lap. Even if she wasn’t really dating Wynonna, Waverly still thought she was. Waverly just thought Nicole had flirted with her future sister-in-law. Great.

“I um-”

“Yeah, I don’t know how you managed to wrangle Wynonna with that horrible game,” Waverly said softly, forced smile on her face. The smile instantly hardened into a frown and Waverly shot Nicole a look. “Always flirting with other girls while your fiancee is in a coma?”

Nicole gaped. “No! I-”

“Let’s go,” Waverly said, standing up quickly. “We have to get the Christmas tree, then we can go home.”

Nicole stood up so quickly she was surprised her chair didn’t completely tip over. Her stomach was clenched, sickness boiling in her belly. God she was such an idiot. “Waverly-”

“No,” Waverly said simply, “I just-” she stopped and took a deep breath. “Wynonna has been gone for...so long sometimes it’s...hard to remember that she’s back.”

Nicole stared down at her boots and sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, Officer Haught,” Waverly said stiffly. “Come on. Before the Christmas tree lot closes.” Waverly started to turn around but hesitated. She turned and picked up the pretzel with a small shrug. She took a big bite out of it and smiled weakly. “It’s...really good.”

Nicole felt the knot in her stomach loosen a little bit as Waverly turned back around and headed towards the garage while Nicole followed, coffee in hand.

***

The car ride to the tree lot started off...awkwardly. The silence thickened the air around them and Nicole felt like she was staring too hard at the road as she drive. Nicole found that when she looked straight ahead, she could still awkwardly watch Waverly in her peripheral vision as she appeared to be struggling with where to look and how to act.

The Christmas music thankfully filled the silence between them. About halfway through the drive, Waverly started to sing along to the songs softly and Nicole couldn’t help but smile. She looked over at the other woman and said quietly, “You...have a nice voice.”

Waverly blushed and scoffed, sputtering a little. “Sorry, I didn’t realize I was...singing. Or whatever you’d call that.”

“It was nice,” Nicole insisted.

Waverly gave her a look and shook her head. “Well, thank you anyways.”

Nicole just hummed her acknowledgement, fingers tapping on the steering wheel in time to the song that was playing.

“So,” Waverly began, breaking the silence again, “how did you and Wynonna meet?”

Nicole felt her cheeks tint and she shifted uncomfortably. The truth was on the tip of her tongue, ready to tumble out. But she swallowed it instead. Talk about a disaster waiting to happen. She just didn’t want to lie to Waverly anymore.

“I um...well I’ve been working the same beat for months. I was stationed outside of Shorty’s and catching all the riff-raff that came in and out. You know,” Nicole started.

“Oh, I definitely know,” Waverly chuckled.

Nicole laughed and continued. “Yeah. So...well she’s somewhat of a regular and...I saw her every night. And…” Nicole blushed and rubbed the back of her neck. “Yeah.”

It wasn’t a lie. Not really. It was just...not telling the whole truth.

“And...what do you like about her?” Waverly asked...almost sadly. Nicole looked over at her but she was staring out the window, face unreadable.”

Nicole shrugged. “She’s...awesome. I mean she’s beautiful, obviously. But she’s also just so...free and tough and...she doesn’t take anyone’s shit. And I think that’s part of what makes her amazing. You know?”

“Yeah, she’s pretty great,” Waverly said, playing with the edge of her sweater. “I just wish she was...around more. Or...talked to us more. Did she ever say why she...didn’t?”

Nicole’s heart broke and she wanted nothing more than to have an answer for Waverly. A reason why her big sister seemed to keep everyone at arm’s length. Nicole licked her lips and shook her head.

“You could tell she was lonely,” Nicole said, looking over at Waverly. “You could see it in her eyes. I don’t think she...wanted to. I just think she didn’t know how...not to.”

Waverly nodded, trying to subtly wipe away a stray tear. Nicole’s grip tightened on the steering wheel and she resisted reaching out to squeeze her hand in comfort. She wished she could give more comfort. To tell her that Wynonna talked about her all the time and loved her more than anything. Nicole knew, somehow, that it was true.

“I’m sorry,” Nicole said, unsure what else to say.

Waverly shook her head. “It’s not your fault. Oh, turn here!”

She pointed at a small lane that Nicole nearly missed but she turned onto it just in time. There were small wooden signs along the way, advertising ‘Tree Farm Ahead!’ with little cartoon trees on them.

“I don’t think those trees know they’re about to be murdered and set up in people’s living rooms,” Nicole said, pointing out the smiling face on one as they passed. She jumped when Waverly hit her arm with the back of her hand.

“Stop! They’re cute,” she said with a playful pout.

“No, they are...but they’re also a little demented. You have to admit,” Nicole said.

Waverly rolled her eyes as they pulled into a parking spot. As soon as Nicole opened the door, she was practically hit in the face with a fresh, cold scent. A smile curled on her lips as she inhaled, shutting her eyes to let the smell overtake her.

“It’s going to snow,” she said matter of factly.

Waverly walked up next to her and looked up towards the sky like Nicole. “I can smell it too.”

“Tonight you think?” Nicole asked, taking another long whiff.

Waverly stood there with her eyes closed for a moment before she nodded. “Definitely. Soon.”

Nicole hummed and adjusted the beanie on her head just as Waverly grabbed the sleeve of her jacket and began to pull her along.

“Come on, let’s get our ugly tree,” she said as they walked towards the main part of the tree lot.

There were a surprising number of trees still left for it being the day before Christmas Eve, but they were definitely the bottom of the barrel. Most were a little squished looking with gaps in the branches or broken limbs. There were a number of shorter ones left that reminded Nicole of the Charlie Brown movie she used to watch as a kid. And...admittedly as an adult too. If it was on tv anyways.

She was trying not to be too distracted by Waverly’s grip on her sleeve and the way that their pinkies brushed just barely as they walked. It sent sparks up Nicole’s spine and warmed her stomach despite the weather. The temperature had seemed to drop ten degrees just during the walk from the car to the lot.

Waverly dropped her sleeve and practically skipped to the middle of the tree lot. Nicole lost her when she disappeared behind some trees. Something cold and wet hit her face and she looked up at the sky. Light snowflakes had begun to fall from the sky and she lit up with a smile.

“Waves!” she called, following where she had disappeared. When she went past a group of trees, she saw Waverly standing in front of a row of short trees. Nicole stopped in her tracks, just taking in how Waverly’s brow was furrowed and the light lit up the edges of her hair and made it look like she was wearing a halo. Waverly turned and saw Nicole, waving her over. Nicole managed to get herself out of her daze and walked over to Waverly.

“It’s snowing,” Waverly said, beaming up at Nicole. “See? I was right.”

Nicole rolled her eyes playfully. “Okay, snow psychic.”

“It’s a useful skill,” Waverly said, tightening the scarf around her neck.

“I’m not doubting that,” Nicole said, looking back at the trees to keep herself from staring at Waverly. She absently rubbed the pine needles of one of the trees between her fingers and shrugged. “What about this one?”

Waverly hummed and tilted her head to the side. “Not sad enough.”

“You like the sad ones, huh?” Nicole said softly as she thought about herself alone on Christmas. Sad like these stupid forgotten trees.

Waverly bumped her with her arm, looking up at the sky. Nicole followed her gaze, looking up as the snowflakes fell from the dark sheet over them, dotted by stars. It would be romantic if Nicole didn’t have a fake fiancee in the hospital right now.

Nicole looked over at Waverly, her eyes following the curve of her cheeks and nose. Her gaze landed on Waverly’s long lashes that had little flecks of snow shining in them. Nicole’s heart felt like it grew in her chest, her ribs expanding painfully as she watched Waverly just…be.

Waverly was just so…beautiful and...had she really only known her for a couple of days? Nicole felt so at home with her. So peaceful and lovely and-

Nicole had it bad.

God she had it bad. Worse than she had ever had it with Wynonna.

Waverly opened her eyes to look at Nicole, smile wide and eyes crinkled into half moons of happiness and Nicole felt something saccharine explode in her chest. With the snowflakes falling around them and the smell of pine trees in the air...Nicole could have written sonnets about that moment.

“What?” Waverly asked, blush tinting her cheeks.

Nicole shrugged and couldn’t help but say. “You’re...beautiful.”

Waverly’s blush got deeper and she ducked her head shyly. Nicole watched the emotions pass over her face before she finally looked up at her, chin jutted forward a little.

“Wynonna’s a lucky woman,” Waverly said, jaw tight. “Good to know she...did something right.”

Nicole chuckled sadly and stuffed her hands in her pockets. No, Wynonna wasn’t lucky. Wynonna barely even knew Nicole existed and she was sure she didn’t want to be engaged to her. Not that it was her fault. Ideally Nicole would have taken her on several dates first. Nicole wondered how things would have gone if she hadn’t gotten herself into this mess. Maybe Waverly would have come into town and...Nicole would have run into her around town. They could have been-...might have been something. Maybe. If even for a little while.

The thoughts running through Nicole’s head made her heart ache and she tried to push them away. Tried to think of...anything else.

She looked back over at the Christmas trees and saw the saddest, most pathetic tree she’d ever seen. It didn’t look more than a foot tall and had to have been missing more than half its branches. The ones it had left stuck up awkwardly, most in weird angles.

Looking back up at Waverly, Nicole saw her looking at the same tree.

“Well you...definitely picked the saddest one,” Nicole said.

“It’s something I’m really good at,” Waverly bragged.

“I can see that,” Nicole said. She pointed to the tree. “That’s the one then?”

“I think so,” Waverly practically beamed. Heaven help Nicole if she ever tried to deny Waverly when she had that look in her eyes. Nicole was already completely whipped for her.

“Alright then,” Nicole said, leaning down to pick up the tree by the base. “Let’s get you your sad tree.”

Nicole reached into her back pocket and pulled out her wallet as a squat older woman who owned the lot approached them. Waverly hit her hand down and frowned up at her.

“Stop, I’ll pay,” Waverly said reaching into her coat pocket for her own wallet.

“No, it’s my Christmas gift to you,” Nicole said, hip checking Waverly lightly and pulling her card from her wallet.

“Nicole!” Waverly said, hands closing around Nicole’s forearm like she was trying to hold her back. “Stop, I’ll pay.”

“Why are you so determined?” Nicole asked, amusement in her voice as she lifted her arm above her head. Waverly stubbornly tried to stay held on, but Nicole lifted her easily from the ground.

“Hey!”

Nicole laughed and lowered Waverly back down to the ground. Her cheeks were flushed and her brow furrowed at Nicole as her feet touched the ground fully again. Nicole laughed again and shook her head as she handed the older woman her card.

“I got it, Waves. You’re ridiculous,” Nicole said, winking at her.

Waverly sputtered, ready to argue back when the older woman spoke instead.

“You two are adorable,” she whispered conspiritally as she swiped Nicole’s card in her handheld reader. She winked at the two of them and Nicole felt her cheeks heat so much she swore it could melt the snowflakes in the air around her.

“Oh we’re not-”

“We don’t-”

They started to talk over each other and it just made the woman smile even more as she handed Nicole back her card. Nicole and Waverly just looked at each other, both with wide eyes and cheeks pink from the cold and embarrassment.

The snowflakes clung to Waverly’s hair and made her impossibly more beautiful.

Nicole’s heart felt like it was beating out of its cage. The whole world seemed to fade away around them and Nicole could swear she heard Waverly’s heart beating just as hard as hers was. Each second that ticked past made it ten times harder not to lean down and kiss Waverly.

“Merry Christmas,” Nicole whispered, holding up the tree to try and break the spell around them.

Waverly blinked, something flashing behind her eyes when she smiled back, but she quickly looked away. “Merry Christmas.”

Nicole’s heart sank again.

“Let’s go.”

***

“Waves, you’re being stubborn,” Nicole sing-songed as Waverly loaded up her arms with bags from the mall. All Nicole could convince Waverly to let her carry was the wimpy Christmas tree that she could carry in one hand. Meanwhile Waverly had at least three bags on each arm.

“I can handle myself, thank you,” Waverly said as she started towards the front door of the McCready house.

In the time it took them to get back to the house, there was already a good foot of snow on the ground. The night felt like it had dropped upwards of ten degrees and the snowfall didn’t look like it was slowing down anytime soon.

“If you say so,” Nicole said, following behind Waverly up to the house.

She saw it before she voiced it. There was a fine, barely visible layer of ice on the walkway to the front porch from the recent temperature change.

“Wait, Waves-!”

The words were out of her mouth just as Waverly’s feet were swept from under her. Nicole dropped the little tree in the snow next to her and lurched forward in an attempt to grab Waverly to keep her from falling. She caught her around the waist but they both tumbled to the ground anyways. The bags toppled over and Waverly landed on top of Nicole, knocking the wind out of her a little bit as her back painfully hit the ground.

“Ah, fuck,” Nicole gasped before dissolving into giggles.

“It’s not funny!” Waverly said, embarrassment lighting up her cheeks. She tried to stand up and slipped again with a small squeak, falling on Nicole again.

Nicole just laughed harder, arms instinctively circling around Waverly’s waist when she landed on top of her. Waverly huffed and hit her arm.

“Stop!”

“Hold on, hold on,” Nicole said, gasping for breath. “I’ll get up first.”

Nicole carefully tried to stand up, bracing herself with her hand on the ground. She stood with her legs bent, arms out as she tried to balance. Waverly followed suit, both of them looking ridiculous with their legs bent and arms wide. They stared at each other, afraid to breathe and their eyes wide. Nicole felt the corner of her mouth twitch into a snicker and Waverly shook her head.

“No laughing.”

Nicole blinked and tried to suppress her snort.

“I said-”

Waverly squeaked again when her legs betrayed her and she slipped again. Nicole reached for her as Waverly reached for Nicole and they held each other close, trying not to fall. Nicole couldn’t help but laugh and she felt Waverly’s body shaking in laughter too.

“This is ridiculous,” Waverly said, almost accusatory.

Nicole gasped through her laughter. “Just-...steady.”

“I’m trying!” Waverly said, trying to stand up on her own. But as soon as she let go of Nicole she fell again and they both dissolved back into giggles. Nicole could feel the snow soaking through her work pants and the back of her jacket was heavy with the wet snow.

Nicole tipped her head back in another loud laugh that only got louder when Waverly’s laugh blended with hers. Neither of them noticed how close their faces were as they laid on the ground, Waverly still mostly on top of Nicole and Nicole’s hands on Waverly’s waist. There was a brief moment that their breath mingled, and it sobered the two of them.

Their laughter faded as they stared at each other, faces close and eyes searching. Nicole’s heart was beating wildly, hands unconsciously tightening on Waverly’s waist.

“Hey,” Nicole said, swallowing thickly. She could see the stars reflecting in hazel eyes and she was surprised that she could even breathe anymore.

“Hey,” Waverly whispered back, smile slowly lifting the corners of her mouth and wrinkling the corners of her eyes.

Nicole’s heart fluttered. She had to break the spell between them before she did something dumb like...try to kiss Waverly. “You...suck at standing.”

Waverly frowned and hit her arm. “You suck at helping me stand.”

“I thought you could do this on your own,” Nicole teased as Waverly stood up again. Nicole immediately missed her weight and the warmth of her body over her. But she let out a sigh of relief and managed to stand up on her own. Waverly moved so she was off the walkway and stood up in the snow. Nicole followed suit, helping her pick up the bags and the tree.

Nicole looked up at the house just as she saw a curtain in one of the windows fall closed. Nicole frowned and they carefully walked up to the porch. As soon as they were at the door, it swung open and Shorty stood there with a wide smile on his face.

“Welcome back, ladies,” he said. “Have fun?”

“Do people often have fun running errands?” Waverly said noncommittally as Shorty took all the bags from her. He quickly stepped away and Waverly and Nicole stood in the doorway for a moment. Shorty looked over his shoulder and smiled, nodding over their heads.

“Hey, look up,” he said with a suspicious twinkle in his eye. Over their heads was a mistletoe hanging from the doorway. Nicole’s entire face heated in embarrassment and she looked at Waverly who looked just as flustered.

“Come on,” Shorty said, gesturing for them to kiss.

They both looked at each other and shook their heads quickly.

“Oh, um, no,” they said together. Awkwardly laughing.

“Come on! It’s tradition,” Shorty said. “Just a little one.”

They looked at each other again and Nicole could see Waverly’s resolve breaking right along with her own. Nicole let a smile flutter on her face and she shrugged in shoulder.

“A small one?” Waverly said, already leaning closer.

Nicole felt her heart reach up and nod her head as she licked her lips. “A small one.”

She clasped her hands together behind her back to keep the temptation of touching Waverly at bay as she leaned down. They paused, lips barely brushing as they both breathed. In that half second Nicole could feel Waverly asking the same questions in her mind.

Was this a good idea? Would it end well? How many hearts were on the line? Too many probably.

But that didn’t stop Nicole from leaning down and pressing her lips to Waverly’s.

It was a peck. A small peck that didn’t last more than two seconds. But Nicole’s entire body felt like it was awakened. No hint of cold left from her fall in the snow. Butterflies erupted in her chest at the small kiss.

And it was over far too fast.

Waverly blinked up at her, cheeks pink and lips parted.

“Oh,” Waverly whispered.

“Girls! Shorty!” Gus yelled, breaking the daze as she ran down the stairs, phone clutched to her chest. “It’s Wynonna!” she said, breathing heavily with a wide smile on her face. “She’s awake!”

Chapter Text

Nicole felt sick all the way to the hospital. Her stomach was churning so much that she was sure she’d have to pull over and ralph in the snow.

Wynonna was awake...Wynonna who - as far as her family was concerned - was in love with Nicole. And engaged to her. A woman she had barely had a conversation with.

God, Nicole was in trouble.

Big trouble.

Driving while talking on the phone wasn’t safe. Nicole was a firm believer in that. But she needed to talk to Shae and since she was in the cruiser escorting Wynonna’s family to the hospital...now was really the only time.

She pushed down the little white button on the phone and waited for the tell tale beeping that her phone was creepily listening to her.

“Call Shae,” she said, eyes still steadfastly on the road.

There was another beep before her phone answered her. “Calling...the Shave Club.”

“No! Cancel!” Nicole said, frantically hitting the button again. “Call Shae. Pressman.”

“Here are some articles on how to shave parmesan.”

“No! Goddamnit,” Nicole said finally looking down at her phone quickly to pick Shae’s number out of her favorites list and put it on speaker. The phone rang a few times before Shae finally picked up.

“Hello?”

“I’m in serious trouble,” Nicole blurted.

Shae was silent for a moment before she let out a long, drawn out, “Okaaaaay. Can you explain before I panic thinking that you’re stuck on the side of a mountain somewhere?”

Nicole tried to take a calming breath. “I’m not stuck on the side of the mountain. But I...well most of Wynonna’s family still think I’m her fiancée and she just woke up.”

Silence again.

“I’m sorry,” Shae finally said. “What?”

“I know,” Nicole groaned.

“And let me guess, you’re on the way to the hospital right now?”

“Yes.”

“Does it get worse?”

“I...might have kissed her sister,” Nicole rushed, bracing herself for the inevitable-

”Nicole.”

“I know!” Nicole moaned, all but letting her forehead drop onto the steering wheel in front of her in personal anguish.

“You’re so incredibly helpless and gay,” Shae complained.

“Trust me, I know,” Nicole said, looking in her rearview mirror to see Gus’ truck following her. There was a small thrill in her stomach just thinking that Waverly was in that car too and she cursed herself. “She’s just...so pretty and I like her so much.”

Shae sighed a little dramatically, in Nicole’s opinion.

“Well, you have to tell her what’s going on before she sees Wynonna. Because when that poor woman sees you and wonders who the hell you are, everything’s gonna come crashing down,” she said.

“You’re right,” Nicole said, running a hand through her hair and making it stick up at odd angles. “I need to just...suck it up and do it.”

“Yep.”

“She’s gonna hate me.”

“Maybe.”

Nicole groaned again as they pulled up to the hospital. She threw the car into park and straightened out the sleeves of her jackets pointlessly. “Well, thanks for the encouragement,” she said sarcastically.

“You’re welcome,” Shae said cheerfully. Her voice sobered a bit when she continued. “Hey, you’ll be fine. Okay? Call me if you need anything.”

“Okay,” Nicole said, tipping her head back against the headrest as she watched Gus, Curtis, Shorty and Waverly all pile out of the truck. Waverly’s eyes looked up and met hers in the mirror, making Nicole’s stomach do a backflip. “I’ll...probably call you later.”

“Bye, babe,” Shae said softly.

“Bye,” Nicole said before she hung up. With one final deep breath, Nicole got out of the car. She used all of her police training to keep her face as neutral as possible as Gus, Curtis and Shorty filed past her. Shorty gave her a sympathetic look and nodded like everything would be fine. Even though Nicole was one hundred percent sure it would not be fine.

Waverly stopped in front of her and Nicole felt her entire body tense. The need to just...reach out and touch Waverly was overwhelming so she stuffed her hands in her pockets as they stared at each other.

Waverly had pulled her ear muffs back over her ears and looked ridiculously cute. She looked down at her watch for a moment before tapping the face and smiling nervously up at Nicole.

“Merry Christmas Eve,” she offered.

Nicole looked down at her own watch and saw that it was just past midnight. She chuckled to herself and stuffed her hands back in her pockets.

“Merry Christmas Eve, Waves,” Nicole replied, sad smile on her face.

Waverly opened her mouth like she had something else to say. Something else on the tip of her tongue that was begging to come out. But she visibly swallowed, smile tight as she walked past Nicole without another word. Nicole looked over her shoulder, watching Waverly walk into the front of the hospital as the snow fell around them.

Nicole tipped her head back and looked up at the sky, heart squeezing in her chest.

What a disaster.

She took a moment to collect herself and started towards the hospital. When she saw John Henry standing outside, cigarette between his lips and thumbs hooked in his belt loops, she paused.

“Officer Haught,” he said, tipping his hat.

“John Henry, right?” Nicole said, slowing to a stop a few feet away from him.

His blue eyes looked back at her, a sadness filling them that Nicole hadn’t expected. “That is right, Officer,” he said. “Back to reunite with your fiancée I am assuming?”

Nicole nodded once, wondering why suddenly this guy seemed so interested in her when she hadn’t really seen him except for the first time she went to the hospital. Now that she thought about it, she had seen him more around town since Wynonna had been in the hospital, popping up out of nowhere when she’d go for coffee or to buy groceries, but that was it.

“I’m just gonna...see how she’s doing,” Nicole said.

He nodded slowly, taking a final puff of his cigarette before dropping it into the snow between his feet. “Wynonna is...a special one. A woman not many have tried to wrangle and even fewer who ever succeeded. She’d always dart at the first smell of someone trying to tie her down.”

Nicole watched as he spoke, his eyes clouding over. He was talking from experience, that much Nicole could gather.

“Yeah I...knew Wynonna was special the first time I ever laid eyes on her,” Nicole said simply.

John Henry hummed, nodded as he tipped his hat back a little. “You know...before she came back into town we had briefly discussed the prospect of...reuniting. In the Biblical sense.”

“O...kay,” Nicole said, shaking her head and hoping he realized he didn’t need to share that much information.”

“But...I had not heard from her and did not even know she had decided to come back,” he admitted, smiling at Nicole briefly. “But...I can see why now. I see that...a far more suitable person than I has found a partner in Wynonna.”

Nicole blushed, the guilt in her gut feeling...impossibly large at the man’s confession. Great. She may have stepped right in the middle of an actual love story. One that...maybe Wynonna would have preferred. The worst part was, Nicole didn’t even know what to say. Or do. Her mind was swimming with even more questions without answers, but she tried anyways.

“John Henry-”

“Guess you better be gettin’ in there, then,” he interrupted, leaning against the pillar of the building and pulling the pack of cigarettes from his back pocket.

Nicole looked at him a moment before simply licking her lips. She nodded at him as she passed into the hospital.

She got in the elevator, hitting the button for Wynonna’s floor so it lit up brightly against the other numbers. The old elevator jerked into use and she licked her lips, shifting awkwardly on her feet as the numbers got higher. Her guts felt like they were twisting around a fork. She clenched and unclenched her fists in her pockets as the door opened to the right floor. But she didn’t have a moment to process before she was pulled from the elevator by a whirlwind of dark blonde hair and high energy.

“Nicole,” Chrissy said breathlessly, dragging her to the side. “You heard?”

“That Wynonna’s awake? Yeah,” Nicole said, eyes looking up to where Wynonna’s room was. The blinds were drawn, but Nicole could still make out shapes of people standing around her bed. “Trust me, I’m already freaking out about it.”

“Oh, Nicole!” Gus called, her head sticking out of the hospital door. She gestured for Nicole to join them and she forced a smile on her face, waving back.

“Alright, time to face the music,” Nicole sighed.

Chrissy just stood there and watched her go. Her palms were sweaty, nerves all on edge as she slipped into Wynonna’s room. She tried to stay in the back but Gus looped her arm through hers and brought her up to the edge of the bed.

Wynonna’s weary blue eyes opened with a groan and she blinked, eyes landing on Curtis first. Slowly her eyes scanned over everyone in the room until she landed on Nicole. She frowned and Nicole felt her heart stop.

“Who...are you?” Wynonna said, voice hoarse.

Nicole felt her face go pale, eyes wide as she stared back at Wynonna helplessly. Everyone turned to look at Nicole, Waverly frowning at her. She licked her lips nervously, hands stuffed back in her pockets to hide how she was picking at the skin on her thumb.

“Oh my god,” Gus breathed, eyes wide to match Nicole’s. “She has amnesia.”

Nicole was sure her eyes were bugging out of her head as everyone fussed over Wynonna. The only person whose eyes were still on her were Waverly’s. She shrugged and opened her mouth uselessly, not sure what to say. But Wynonna grabbed for Waverly’s hand and successfully pulled her attention away. When everyone was distracted, Nicole grabbed Shorty’s arm and pulled him out of the room.

“I have to tell them,” Nicole spilled in a harsh whisper. “I have to tell them I can’t-...I can’t let this go on any longer. Poor Gus and...and Waverly.”

Shorty nodded, hand on her shoulder. “Okay, Nicole, calm down-”

“Shorty! I can’t-” Nicole let out a harsh breath through her nose and shook her head. “I have to tell them. This has gone on long enough.”

“Okay, okay, you’re right,” Shorty said. Nicole let out a long sigh of relief, some of the burden of her secret lifted off her shoulders. It was almost over. Sure everyone would hate her but...it was almost over.

It was a weird dichotomy of relief and sadness in her gut.

“But...let me handle it,” he finished.

“What? Why you? It should be me,” Nicole insisted.

Shorty shook his head. “I’m a much older friend and much harder to get mad at,” he said with a raise of his eyebrows.

“I...fine,” Nicole said, shoulders slumping in defeat. Shorty had a point.

Nicole looked back to the room and saw John Henry staring back at her. She shifted nervously and looked back at Shorty.

“I’m sorry I let it get this far.”

“We both did,” Shorty acquiesced. “Okay, let’s get you back in there. I’ll tell them later-”

“I can’t go back in there,” Nicole hissed. She ran her hand through her hair and scratched at the back of her head. “I’m...I’m gonna go. I have an early shift tomorrow and...yeah.”

Shorty nodded and squeezed her shoulder. “Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Nicole sighed and smiled at the man that had so graciously welcomed her into his life. A person she had almost looked at as...family or a friend at the very least. With one final nod and smile, she turned back towards the elevators.

Chrissy scrambled from behind the desk as Nicole walked, grabbing Nicole’s sleeve to stop her.

“Hey,” Chrissy whispered not so subtly. “What’s going on?”

“Your the nurse here, shouldn’t you know?” Nicole said, an edge to her voice that seemed to knock Chrissy back for a moment.

Chrissy’s hand was still on Nicole’s arm and she leaned a little closer to her. “Do they-...what did Wynonna say?”

Nicole shrugged. “They think she has amnesia because she doesn’t remember me.”

Chrissy’s eyes got wide and she leaned even closer, their faces uncomfortably close. “Maybe...she does.”

“I doubt it Chrissy,” Nicole said pulling her arm free gently. “I have to get to work. I’ll talk to you later, okay? If I don’t get murdered by the Earp family first.”

Chrissy took a step back and gave Nicole a sympathetic smile as she dragged herself off the floor and to the elevator. She hit the button and the door was almost close when a hand shoved it’s way into the opening to halt its movement. Nicole stared wide eyed as Waverly pushed her way through the small gap in the elevator doors before letting them close again.

She crossed her arms over her chest with a huff, not even looking at Nicole as she stood in the middle of the elevator and the doors closed. Nicole blinked at her with a frown.

“Um-”

“What are you doing?” Waverly hissed, turning to look at Nicole.

“What are you talking about?” Nicole asked, nervously eyeing the numbers on the elevator as they counted down. Soon they’d be on the ground and she’d be free. Until...Waverly hit the emergency stop button and halted its movement. Great.

“You’re just...leaving?” Waverly asked incredulously.

Nicole felt her tongue swell, making it hard to speak. “She doesn’t even want to talk to me. She doesn’t...remember me-”

Waverly scoffed. “I should have known.”

“Should have known what?” Nicole said, immediately defensive.

“That you would try to bolt!” Waverly said. “Wynonna’s awake and you’re still flirting with every girl in existence.”

“What are you talking about?” Nicole asked, frustration leaking through her voice.

“I saw you,” Waverly said, turning on her heel to face Nicole and fix her with a look, her voice wavering just a little. “I saw you and...Chrissy.”

Nicole shook her head, confused. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I saw how close Chrissy was to you. She was doing the lean,” Waverly said with a triumphant smile like she had caught Nicole.

“The lean?” Nicole asked.

“Yes, the lean,” Waverly said, leaning dramatically close to Nicole like she was trying to demonstrate. “The flirt lean.”

“I was not flirting with Chrissy,” Nicole said with a disbelieving laugh.

“Chrissy flirts with everyone, I’ve known her forever. I know what Chrissy’s flirting looks like,” Waverly said, cheeks flushed.

Nicole shut her eyes, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands as she took a calming breath. “Waverly...what do you want me to say?”

“You’re just-!” Waverly threw her hands up in the air before gesturing wildly at Nicole. “How the hell did you two even find each other! You don’t work, you’re not her type and she’s-...doesn’t seem like your type. She would never-”

Waverly’s mouth snapped closed and Nicole felt herself bristle. “She would never be with someone like me, you mean?”

Waverly rolled her eyes. “That’s not what I mean-”

“Well, that’s what you just said,” Nicole said, voice breaking a little. “Are we done? Or-?”

“Nicole, I didn’t say that,” Waverly insisted.

“Than what are you trying to say?” Nicole asked, shrugging.

Waverly crossed her arms tighter in front of her chest and shook her head. “I just-...want you to be happy.”

Nicole scoffed. “What? You’re like some kind of happiness expert now?”

Waverly rolled her eyes. “I know more than you-”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Ms. I-Can’t-Tell-My-Family-What-I-Really-Want-To-Do-With-My-Life,” Nicole said sarcastically.

Waverly sputtered in offense. “You don’t know me at all!”

“You’re right, I don’t!” Nicole said. “And you don’t know me either!”

With that, Nicole hit the button on the elevator to get it moving again. They stared at each other, both seething until the delicate ‘ding’ of the elevator doors opened. Nicole gestured sarcastically for Waverly to leave the elevator first and she shifted uncomfortably.

“I’m going back up,” she said softly.

“You stopped my elevator just to yell at me?” Nicole asked, disbelieving. Waverly just shrugged and Nicole scoffed as she got out of the elevator. “Merry fucking Christmas,” she said just as the doors closed again and Waverly was out of sight.

***

Nicole practically flopped into her desk back at the station. After a quick few hours of sleep and a shower, she was still feeling like shit but there hadn’t been any angry calls or texts so Nicole assumed that Shorty hadn’t told anyone the truth about her yet. Probably for the best.

She did feel bad about blowing up at Waverly. But to be fair, Waverly came at her first, or so she reasoned.

As soon as Nicole was in the chair, Lonnie came sidling up to her. He smiled and put a donut and napkin on her desk. She looked up at him suspiciously and to his credit, his smile only faltered slightly.

“So um...Nicole,” Lonnie said. He sat on the edge of her desk casually, but catching her death stare, he quickly stood back up and cleared his throat. “So um...how do you feel about taking my shift tomorrow.”

The denial was right on the tip of her tongue, but Nicole swallowed it down. She had no real reason to deny the request. There was nothing she was doing on Christmas, especially now.

“Fine,” she said.

“Now, Nicole, hear me out-” Lonnie stopped mid-plea and frowned at her. “What?”

“I’ll take your shift,” Nicole clarified, only slightly annoyed.

“Really?” Lonnie breathed.

Nicole gave him a look. “Ask me again and I’ll rescind my offer.”

“Okay! Thank you!” Lonnie said before scrambling away back to his own desk. Nicole ran a hand through her hair and looked at the pile of paperwork on her desk. At least it would distract her from...whatever else was happening in her life currently. Like how the night before she was tossing and turning, mind stuck with images of Waverly. Of how soft her lips were against Nicole’s.

About how angry she had been just thinking Nicole was flirting with Chrissy. There was no way Waverly couldn’t hate her after the truth came out.

“Whatever,” Nicole sighed, flipping open the first file on her desk. “Merry Christmas to me.”

***

The pile of paperwork on Nicole’s desk had dwindled, only about a third of the stack remaining when her phone rang. She picked it up, cradling the receiver between her ear and shoulder as she answered.

“Officer Haught, Purgatory Sheriff’s Department. How can I help you?” she said.

“Nicole, it’s Shorty.”

Her hands paused over the file she was sorting and she frowned. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I was just wondering if you were coming to the hospital after work at all,” he asked.

“Um...I wasn’t planning on it-”

“Well you should.”

“Did you tell them?” Nicole whispered, eyes darting around the office.

“No,” he said. “I’ll tell them...after you come over today.”

“Shorty-”

“I promise.”

Nicole felt a pull in her stomach telling her not to do it. Not to go over and to just let this all be done. But selfishly...she wanted to see Waverly. Her stupid crush had taken hold and wouldn’t let go. It was a feeling in her heart, like a hand reaching up from her heart and forcing her to nod her head.

“Fine.”

“Okay, see you in a few.”

Shorty hung up and Nicole sighed. She really didn’t know how to make things easier for herself.

***

On the way back to the hospital, Nicole stopped in an antique store. Well, more like she was walking past it and saw a snowglobe in the window that caught her eye. It was small and delicate, with silver feet on the bottom, and in the globe was a miniature version of Cambridge. Nicole couldn’t help but think about Waverly and the way her eyes lit up when she talked about travel...about getting away.

Without a second thought, Nicole ducked inside and got the small gift, bundling it up in the brown paper bag it came in and stuffing it in her pocket.

It felt heavy in her jacket as she walked up to the hospital.

She went up to Wynonna’s floor, eyes immediately scanning for Shorty. But the only person she saw was...well, no one. Wynonna was sitting up in her bed, eating Jello and making a face as she watched something on the television.

“What the hell, Shorty,” Nicole said under her breath as she slowly approached the room. She knocked on the doorframe to get Wynonna’s attention and she turned to look at her.

“Hey, Red,” Wynonna said, smirk on her face as she visibly scanned Nicole’s body. She felt herself flush as she stepped into the room, smiling back at the other woman.

“H-hey,” Nicole said, clearing her throat in an attempt to get rid of some of the awkwardness. “Feel okay?”

Wynonna shrugged. “I feel great. The doc says I can head out tonight after my tests come back. But honestly, I’ve had hangovers worse than this.”

Nicole chuckled and walked closer to the bed. She sat on the chair next to Wynonna’s bed as she stabbed the red Jello in the cup.

“Well, I’m glad you’re feeling better,” Nicole said, stuffing her hands under her thighs as she sat.

Wynonna looked at Nicole, scrutinizing her. Nicole wasn’t sure how long she could stand it, but thankfully the other woman finally spoke up.

“So...we’re getting hitched,” Wynonna said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Nicole cleared her throat and rubbed the back of her neck. “Um...yeah…” she trailed off.

“Seems weird for me,” Wynonna admitted. She had squashed the Jello up into tiny pieces with her spoon before shoving it towards Nicole. “Want some?”

“Um...sure,” Nicole said taking the plastic cup from her and taking a cautious bite. She felt Wynonna’s eyes on her as she wrinkled her nose and set the cup down on the bedside table. Wynonna snorted, a little laugh leaving her lips that Nicole couldn’t help but smile at.

“Disgusting, right?” Wynonna said. She laid her hands down flat on the bed sheet and up at Nicole. “Tell me about this engagement then.”

Nicole choked even though she wasn’t chewing anything.

“Like I said,” Wynonna said, fixing Nicole with a look. “Doesn’t really seem like something...I would do. But also...I can’t imagine why Gus would...lie to me about that. Or Waves.”

“So you haven’t talked to Shorty yet?” Nicole asked, twisting her fingers in her lap. Why would he leave Nicole here like this when he hadn’t said anything to them yet? Seemed like...a poor plan.

Wynonna shrugged. “Yeah. But he just said that you were going to take me home from the hospital tonight.”

“Great,” Nicole said under her breath.

Wynonna stared at her, blue eyes squinting like she was trying to put together the pieces of a puzzle. Nicole just stared right back, unsure of what to do in these...odd circumstances.

“Nicole,” Wynonna said, jerking her head over. “Come’re.”

Nicole felt the blood rushing through her ears as she leaned forward a little bit. Wynonna lifted her hand up and stroked the side of Nicole’s face. She felt her face flush, mouth suddenly go dry as she just let Wynonna...touch her. It was weird. Certainly very weird to have the girl she had dreamed about for months just stroking her face. But she couldn’t help but realize that the same...electricity wasn’t there as when Waverly touched her. Or even got close to her.

“You’d think I’d remember this mug,” Wynonna said, tilting her head to the side as her hand dropped back to the bed. “And...to be honest I never thought I’d marry. Let alone a...woman. No offense, Haught.”

“None taken,” Nicole said leaning back in her chair.

“Tell me…” Wynonna said, a curious glint in her eyes. “Sex’s good. Right?”

Nicole flushed deeply, but luckily the doctor walked in right then, clipboard in hand. He looked between the two, probably because Nicole was beet red and Wynonna had a shit eating grin on her face. Wynonna winked at her before turning to look at the doctor. He cleared his throat and nodded at the two of them.

“You’re good to go, Ms. Earp,” he said with a smile. “Is this your fiancée here to take you home?”

“Guess so,” Wynonna shrugged.

Nicole, thankful for the distraction, helped Wynonna get all her things and wheeled her out of the hospital. She hoped desperately that Shorty would be at the house when she took Wynonna there. Or at least that there wouldn’t be someone there waiting to pounce on her for lying to Wynonna.

“Wow, I’m not used to riding in the front like this,” Wynonna said as she got into the passenger seat of Nicole’s cruiser.

Nicole chuckled but batted Wynonna’s hand away when she reached forward to play with the buttons of the center console. “Don’t touch.”

“Oo, you like it rough, copper,” Wynonna said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Nicole blushed deeply and started the car. “Alright, Wynonna.”

“No, seriously,” Wynonna said, twisting her body in the seat to face Nicole better as she pulled out of the hospital parking lot. “We’re somehow…engaged and I don’t know anything about you.”

“How are you...so chill with the whole...being engaged and not remembering it, thing?” Nicole said, finally asking the question that had been bugging her since she started talking to Wynonna at the hospital.

Wynonna shrugged, tilting her head back against the headrest. “You seem-...well, if Waverly is to be believed, you’re a good person. A really good person. And...I don’t know. Sure it’s weird but...well, as I’m sure you know I’ve just come back into town. I was darting around town avoiding my family because I was...ashamed I guess. No, I...know. I was ashamed. I was avoiding them so I didn’t have to see the disappointment on their face when I hadn’t made anything of myself again.”

Nicole split her time between looking at Wynonna and looking at the road, watching as the corners of her eyes misted over a little bit.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is...I was looking for something...new. Something better,” Wynonna continued. “And maybe...that’s you. You know? If you could know me and lov-...want to marry me then maybe there was something salvageable there.”

Nicole reached over and covered Wynonna’s hand with her own. Not to hit on her or anything just to...hopefully comfort. In some way. Wynonna was so lonely, just as lonely as Nicole. She knew how it felt...not to belong. And it seemed like...even in a coma, they had been mutually beneficial to each other. Somehow.

“You’re something, Wynonna,” Nicole assured her gently. “You’re more than something. You’re...amazing. I’ve known that since before I even talked to you.”

Wynonna snorted unattractively, head rolling back on her neck as she looked back at the road. “Ah, I can see why I fell for you, Haught. A sweet talker.”

Nicole just hummed as they pulled up to the McCready house. Wynonna groaned and looked up at it.

“Do I really have to go in there?” Wynonna all but whined.

“Yes,” Nicole said definitively as she got out of the car. She opened the door for Wynonna and she slid out, still pouting as she looked up at the house.

“But they’re going to be all...fussy.”

“Yeah, because they love you,” Nicole pointed out. “I wish I had people to be fussy about me.”

Wynonna watched Nicole get her bag from her trunk before walking over to her, standing close. Nicole looked down into her eyes, just as clear blue as the first day she saw her and swore she was in love with her.

“You know, for someone who’s supposed to be excited about marrying me, you haven’t even tried to kiss me yet,” Wynonna pointed out with a smirk.

Nicole felt panic twist around her gut and she stammered. “Oh, I um...I mean...you forgot and I didn’t wanna...push.”

Before Nicole could process what was happening, Wynonna’s fingers were curled into the front of her jacket and she pulled her close. Their lips pressed together and Nicole just stood there in shock as they kissed.

It was...nice.

But not wonderful. It wasn’t the stars and the moon being moved at the same time.

Wynonna pulled away, but kept their faces close. Their breath was visible in the air around them as they stared at each other. Wynonna frowned at Nicole then leaned forward and kissed her again. This time softer and...more tender. Nicole tried to relax into the kiss. Tried to enjoy it. But all she could think about was the brief peck with Waverly the night before and how it jump started her heart.

Wynonna pulled away again, still frowning. “Huh,” she said. But there was no explanation other than that when she finally let go of Nicole’s jacket and started towards the house.

“Huh,” Nicole repeated, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. She closed the trunk and followed Wynonna to the front of the house. Before Wynonna could even knock, Waverly was opening the door and looking between the two of them.

“Hey, Waves, spying much?” Wynonna said, leaning forward and kissing Waverly’s cheek. “Didn’t take you for a voyeur.”

“I wasn’t-” Waverly took a deep breath and let herself smile before she continued. “I’m glad you’re home.”

“Thanks, babygirl,” Wynonna said with a wink. She took her bag from Nicole and gestured to the inside. “You coming in, Haught?”

“Oh, um...I should go,” Nicole said, pointing back to her cruiser. “I got...a cat.”

Wynonna frowned at Nicole. “Mm, okay, weirdo.” Wynonna hesitated a moment before she leaned forward and kissed Nicole’s cheek. She pulled back with the same frown from the first time she kissed Nicole. “Huh.”

And with that, Wynonna turned back into the house and disappeared. Nicole’s cheeks felt hot as she forced herself to look down at Waverly still standing there. She was wearing another ridiculous Christmas sweater with blinking lights surrounding little gingerbread men doing a can-can line. She was even wearing an antler headband that somehow worked for her.

When Nicole noticed that, she snorted, earning her a look from Waverly.

“Sorry,” Nicole said, getting her giggles under control.”You’re just...it looks cute.”

Waverly blushed and stepped out on the porch, closing the door behind her. Nicole raised her hands up near her chest in surrender.

“If you want to yell at me again-”

“I don’t-”

“I’m just saying, if you do...let me give you this first.” Nicole said. She reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out the brown paper bag with the little snow globe in it. She blushed as she handed it to Waverly, rubbing the back of her neck. “It’s not much. I just...it reminded me of you.”

Waverly opened it and gently took out the snowglobe, eyes wide. “Oh. Cambridge.”

“Yeah, you know how you said you...wanted to explore the world and work in an old university so…” Nicole tried to play it off. “It just...reminded me of you. And I thought it might remind you of...what you could do. If you wanted.”

Waverly clutched the snow globe to her chest, eyes shining as she looked up at Nicole. “It’s wonderful. Thank you.”

“Like I said...it’s nothing,” Nicole mumbled.

Waverly shook her head and reached for Nicole’s hand, squeezing. “I wanted to say...I’m sorry about yelling at you. I guess-...Wynonna was awake and I was emotional and protective and I...didn’t know what to do. I took it out on you.”

“I’m...sorry too,” Nicole said, knowing she’d have more to apologize for after Shorty had a talk with them soon.

“I just want you to be happy,” Waverly said, looking back down at the snowglobe. “Do you think-...are you happy?”

Nicole shrugged, looking at their clasped hands and thinking of the electricity running from Waverly’s skin to hers. How it made her feel alive and like she wanted to die all at the same time. Like nothing she’d ever felt before.

“I am right now.”

Waverly smiled at Nicole and nodded, sniffling as she looked down at their hands too. “You and Wynonna...you’ll be good for each other.”

Nicole wanted to blurt everything out. About the lie and about how she wanted to be with Waverly. How they would be good together. If she just gave them a chance despite everything.

“Waverly, things are...going to change soon,” Nicole said softly, trying to keep her emotions in check. “So I just want you to know...that you mean a lot to me. And you’ve been a great friend these past few days. Well...yesterday. I had a really good time yesterday.”

Nicole squeezed Waverly’s hand and looked up at her. Her heart broke knowing she’d be hurting Waverly soon. That she’d be hurting all of them soon. More reason to get out of there as soon as she could.

“So thank you,” Nicole finished, letting go of Waverly’s hand and letting it fall away from her own.

“Thank you,” Waverly whispered, still cradling the snow globe close.

They smiled at each other, a sadness in each of their eyes that the other didn’t quite understand. Nicole turned around and headed back for her cruiser, hoping Waverly couldn’t hear her heart break as she walked away.

Chapter Text

Nicole lay lengthwise on her couch, staring at the television with CJ curled up on her stomach. The cat’s purring reverberated through her and filled the room. She sighed and watched as someone else on the screen fell in love. With an audible groan, she decided to look up at the ceiling instead.

The lights from the Christmas tree reflected on her ceiling and she wondered how many other people were at home alone on Christmas Eve. Probably...a lot. And not all of them were sad, she reasoned. She didn’t…have to be alone. She just chose to be alone. It was fine.

What wasn’t fine was the fact that she couldn’t stop thinking about Waverly. At all.

Everything reminded her of the youngest Earp.

She couldn’t help but think about the brief kiss that they shared, or the way her hair smelled when Nicole accidently caught a whiff of it.

Sandalwood.

Or how her smile could light a thousand Christmas trees and bring even the meanest Grinch to their knees.

The twisting and turning in Nicole’s stomach told her one thing: She was in love with Waverly Earp.

It seemed stupid. And it probably was. After all, she’d only known Waverly for a day. But the way her heart soared at the mere thought of her told Nicole that she was at least at the beginnings of love. At the edge of the cliff, ready to fall into the deep void at the slightest push.

It was unfortunate because not only did Waverly clearly not feel the same way, but Nicole was supposed to be in love with her sister. And if that wasn’t a mess of things, she didn’t know what was.

Shae had tried to call her twice now, but Nicole just ignored it. She didn’t need pity or anything like that. She just wanted to sit here and watch a Christmas movie. By herself. On Christmas Eve...with her cat.

It wasn’t sad or anything...maybe a little pathetic. Nicole could live with pathetic.

Her phone rang again and Nicole groaned, poised to decline the call, when she saw Shorty’s name across the top. Slowly, she unlocked the phone and put it to her ear, ready to hear the worst.

“Hello?”

“Don’t sound so scared,” Shorty said. “Hello to you too.”

Nicole chuckled, the sudden movement shocking CJ and she lifted her head from Nicole’s chest, frowning at her. “Sorry. I just...did you talk to them yet?”

“About that…”

“Shorty,” Nicole said, voice bordering on whining.

“Okay, before you complain. I was thinking you could just...come to Christmas breakfast tomorrow.”

“Christmas breakfast?” Nicole asked as CJ flopped over on her side.

Shorty answered like it was the most obvious thing. “Yeah! We make Santa pancakes in pajamas before going over to the Purgatory Christmas Parade.

“Isn’t the parade just...Nedley dressed up like Santa and rolling down main street with a horse wearing antlers?” Nicole asked, thinking back to what Lonnie had told her about the parade when he was trying to convince her to take his shift.

“Well...yeah. But that’s why it’s so fun.”

“Shorty,” Nicole started, “we have to tell them.”

“I’ll tell them at breakfast,” Shorty reasoned. “It’ll be best if you’re there when I...break the news.”

It was tempting to say no. To just stay holed up in her apartment, go to work, and come back without controversy. But she found herself nodding instead, even if Shorty couldn’t see her.

“Yeah, fine,” Nicole sighed. “I’m not wearing pajamas though.”

“It’s tradition!”

“I have to go to work right after.”

“Okay,” Shorty grumped. “Tomorrow. Eight sharp.”

“I’ll be there,” Nicole said, wishing she wasn’t excited about seeing Waverly.

“Night, Nicole.”

“Night.”

***

Nicole tucked her uniform shirt into her pants and straightened out the sleeves. Admittedly she was taking extra time to get ready because...well she really didn’t want to go over to the McCready’s house...right? She didn’t want to see Waverly in her cute little pajamas, probably with matching slippers. She certainly didn’t…miss her…

But here Nicole was, spending a little extra time on her hair to make sure it looked casually messy but still presentable, and putting on her good work boots. If this was going to be the last time she saw Waverly before everything went to shit, she was at least going to look nice.

With one final pat to CJ’s head, Nicole grabbed her beanie, stuffed it into the pocket of her jacket and headed out. Her fingers tapped nervously on the steering wheel the entire drive over. She pulled into the McCready driveway and just sat there staring up at the house for a moment like someone walking into their own execution.

Maybe she was being a little dramatic, but she didn’t know what to expect in there.

After a few moments of sitting, Shorty popped his head outside the door and gestured for her to come in. Nicole blew a piece of hair from her face and braced herself, opening the door to her cruiser and walking towards the house.

“Hey, Shorty,” she said, dread dripping from her words.

“You sound like death,” Shorty said, opening his arms and enveloping her into a warm hug. “It’s Christmas! Cheer up.”

“Thanks,” she mumbled, voice muffled from his chest. “Hard to be cheerful when I’m about to get yelled at.”

“Don’t be so negative,” Shorty said softly, holding her away from him by the shoulders. “It’ll be fine.”

Nicole just gave him a look that made it clear she didn’t believe him. He clapped her on the shoulder one more time before Wynonna walked up behind him.

“Hey, who’s-” she paused when she saw Nicole standing in the doorway. She smiled a little awkwardly, pulling at her pajamas that Nicole noticed was actually a onesie. It looked like it had little coffee cups printed all over it and a fur lined hood. Nicole couldn’t help but giggle, pulling her lip between her teeth to try and keep down the hard laughter bubbling in her throat. “Hey, Red.”

Nicole swallowed the laughter. “Hey, Wynonna.”

Wynonna rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. “Looks like someone didn’t adhere to the very strict dress code. Where are your pajamas?”

“I have to go to work after this,” Nicole explained, looking down at her uniform.

“Okay, girls, come on,” Shorty said, ushering Nicole inside and shutting the door behind them. Wynonna squinted at Nicole as she toed off her shoes and shrugged off her jacket.

“What?” Nicole asked as she put her jacket on the hook.

Wynonna shrugged and looked away briefly like she was trying to figure something out. Looking back at Nicole, she paused for a moment before reaching out to hug Nicole. Shocked by the move, Nicole hesitated for a moment before looping her arms around Wynonna’s waist. They both turned their heads at the same time, faces awkwardly close. They both just looked at each other for a moment before Wynonna awkwardly leaned in and pecked Nicole’s lips. Nicole blushed deeply, especially when she looked up and saw Waverly coming down the stairs.

Wynonna dropped her arms from around Nicole’s neck, brown eyes focused on hazel, and everything else faded away for a moment.

“Hey,” Waverly said with a brief smile, her eyes looking back at Wynonna.

“Hey,” Nicole said, smiling so wide that her dimples popped.

Waverly was wearing a onesie too, but hers was plaid with little white unicorn outlines printed on it. Nicole felt like her entire heart expanded five times in her chest.

“Alright, weirdos,” Wynonna said loudly, breaking the spell that was over them. “Let’s get some mimosas.”

“It’s eight in the morning,” Nicole countered.

Wynonna looked at her like she had grown a third head. “Exactly. Which is why we’re having mimosas. We’re not savages...we switch to whiskey after noon.”

Wynonna turned on her heel and walked towards the kitchen, Waverly smiling at Nicole one more time before following. Shorty chuckled and shook Nicole by the shoulder a little.

“What?” Nicole asked, trying to fight the blush off her cheeks.

“Nothin’,” Shorty said with his own smile that was clearly hiding something. “Come on now, pancake time.”

***

They all gathered around the kitchen table, plates piled high with pancakes, red and green with color which was unappetizing in its own way. But Nicole’s were worse. They were an odd...almost grey color. Wynonna had claimed she’d seen a video on the internet and learned to marble the red and green together. Instead the colors mixed in the batter and made the pancakes an ominous moldy shade. But Nicole, being a good fake fiancèe, let Wynonna have her carefully colored red and green ones while Nicole took the gross ones.

Nicole somehow ended up sitting between Wynonna and Waverly, so when Gus called for everyone to say grace, Nicole ended up holding both their hands. Safe to say she didn’t hear a single word that Gus said because her mind was running a thousand miles a second.

Her held her palm up, waiting for Waverly’s hand to fill her own. Waverly looked at her for a moment, eyes searching Nicole’s face before she slowly slid her palm over Nicole’s. It was like electricity sliding through Nicole’s veins at their lightest touch.

Waverly’s hand was so soft and felt so...small and delicate in her own. Yet still strong and firm. Her hand was so warm and it felt so...just so right. Nicole swore she felt Waverly’s fingers curl ever so slightly in her palm, brushing her fingers over her skin as Gus spoke. Grace was over far too quickly and Waverly’s hand was back in her own lap.

Wynonna’s hand was gone before Nicole could even register it.

They started to eat, Gus and Curtis lovingly bickering over where the best maple syrup came from. John Henry was there too, occasionally throwing a sad glance in Nicole and Wynonna’s direction. Shorty just seemed oddly quiet, almost creepily staring at the three women across the table from him.

Christmas music played throughout the dining room, some old sad song Nicole recognized but was too distracted to clock what it actually was. The pancakes were delicious, despite their repulsive color. What was distracting Nicole was how Waverly was telling a story about school, her hands moving in that way that made Nicole’s heart beat just a little faster.

Waverly was laughing about something, head tipped back and eyes crinkled at the corners and she was the most beautiful thing Nicole had ever seen. It made her stomach ache with a mix of sadness and longing.

As she turned, she caught Nicole’s eyes and faltered for a moment, smile sobering. She shook her head. “What?”

“Nothing,” Nicole said, blushing at being caught. “Just-...I-...your...pajamas are cute.”

Waverly blushed but quickly played it off. “Do you go to sleep in your uniform?”

“I have to go to work after this,” Nicole explained. Waverly took a big bite of her pancakes as Nicole continued. “Plus,” she added slyly, “I couldn’t very well come over in my pajamas. I can’t show up at your door naked.”

Waverly choked on her pancake, coughing and sputtering. Nicole tried to pat her back, holding back her own laughter, but Waverly waved away her hand.

“I’m fine,” she coughed, tears at the corners of her eyes. “I just-...wrong pipe.”

Nicole leaned a little closer to Waverly to check on her just as Gus cleared her throat to get everyone’s attention. Everyone looked at her and she looked around the table, eyes shining. Her eyes finally landed on Wynonna and Nicole.

Almost instantly, Nicole knew she was going to hate whatever was about to happen.

“I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to my family. Because yes, every single one of you is family,” Gus said, looking pointedly at Nicole and Shorty. “And to thank you all for being here.” She looked at Wynonna, eyes shining. “I’m so happy we could all be together for Christmas. These past couple of days have been rough but we did what family does. We came together.”

Nicole’s stomach twisted and she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She wasn’t supposed to be here. She shouldn’t be here. She wasn’t family, not even close. Even though she had let herself pretend for a few moments that she could be part of this family, it wasn’t in the cards for her. Not after everything.

Gus continued. “And I just want to say...thank you, Nicole, for being the rock Wynonna needed. And for being such a steadfast part of this family even after only a few days. You’ve truly been a blessing and….well, thank you, Wynonna for bringing her into the family.”

Nicole could feel the sickness at the bottom of her throat, ready to come up at any moment. She looked at Shorty who looked just as thrown off by Gus’ ‘Welcome to the family’ speech as she was. They stared at each other for a moment before something broke inside of Nicole.

“I can’t,” she blurted, stopping Gus in her tracks. “I can’t-...I-“

Nicole looked around and everyone looked back at her like she had gone nuts. She swallowed thickly, looking at Waverly who looked just as confused.

“I’m...sorry,” she started. “I-...I was...never engaged to Wynonna.”

“Nicole,” Shorty interrupted.

“No, I have to,” Nicole said to him. Her hands gripped the edge of the table so hard her knuckles were turning white. She licked her lips and looked back at Gus. “I...at the hospital there was a...miscommunication. And before I could correct it you thought I was engaged to Wynonna and I just…” Nicole felt her throat begin to close, tears pressing behind the back of her eyes. “You were so...nice and welcoming and I was so lonely if felt nice just to be a part of a family for...a little bit. And I’m so so sorry for hurting you. I really...really thought I was in love with you, Wynonna. But then I ended up falling in love with-“

Nicole’s eyes naturally landed on Waverly who was looking up at her with wide and-...if Nicole let herself dream…hopeful eyes. She swallowed thickly, “-fell in love with-“

She looked back up where everyone was looking at her with bated breath. “-with every single one of you.”

“Kinky, Haught,” Wynonna muttered from behind her. Nicole turned and looked to see the teasing smile on her face and narrowed her eyes at her.

“Not...like that. But…” Nicole turned back to everyone else. “I know you...probably don’t want to see me anymore. So I’ll...I’m sorry.”

Everyone just continued to stare at her as Nicole quickly stood up, almost knocking her chair back. She cleared her throat to cover the sound of her heart shattering.

“Nicole-“ Shorty started again, but Nicole shook her head and started towards the door. She reached down and grabbed her boots, not wanting to take the time to put them on. She needed to be out of the house as soon as possible. So she just picked them up and took her jacket off the hook, leaving the house as fast as she could. The snow soaked through her thick socks, ice crawling up her spine as she walked across the yard and back to her cruiser.

By the time she slid into the seat and shut the door, her jaw was chattering and lips practically blue. She felt the hot tears falling down her face and quickly wiped them away with the back of her hand as she started the car.

She couldn’t bring herself to look at Waverly before she bolted, but now she was wishing she had. Just one last look before Waverly went back to school. Next time she came into town she would probably avoid Nicole at all costs. They’d pass each other on the street and duck into little shops, or suddenly finding something on the ground interesting.

It was fine since Waverly would probably forget about their kiss in the matter of moments. Nicole though...she knew she’d be thinking about it for far longer than she ever should.

“Get it together, Haught,” Nicole gritted out as she pulled out of the McCready driveway, her vision blurry from the tears insistent on trailing down her face. “You did this to yourself.”

Her snow soaked socks slipped on the gas pedal as she drove, but she couldn’t bring herself to put her shoes on yet. So she drove all the way to the station with soggy socks and tear stained cheeks.

***

Nicole had never been more thankful for an empty bullpen at work. The sad Christmas tree in the corner seemed to mock her as the lights blinked different colors, casting bright colored spots over the paper in front of Nicole on her desk. There was a cheap plastic Santa ornament Lonnie had gotten at the gas station because he thought it was funny peeking out from the bushes. And every few minutes it would let out an overly cheery, ’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

Nicole had never wanted to murder an ornament so badly in her life.

Every time she looked up at the tree, she could see his pinpoint painted eyes staring at her from across the room.

If her whole body didn’t ache from sadness she’d drag herself over to the tree and toss that mocking Santa.

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

Nicole had managed to rip her eyes away from the ornament and looked back down at her paperwork. She’d already done all her paperwork and was triple checking it at this point. Anything to keep her from thinking about Waverly. Not only Waverly, but the entire family she’d been lying to during the holidays.

The more idle Nicole’s hands were, the deeper her thoughts went. She wondered what it might be like to take Waverly on a date. To hold her hand and take her to dinner or a movie. Or maybe one of those museums in the city. Somewhere she could take Waverly and just listen to her spew out knowledge on things she’d never even thought about. But as soon as she thought it, she pushed it away.

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

She looked back up at the tree, grip tightening on her pen. That thing had to go. She stood up from her desk, anger fueling her walk over to the tree where she ripped the offending ornament from the branches. She looked at it for a moment, Santa’s poorly painted cheeks rosy and bright.

“Fuck this guy,” Nicole muttered to herself as she turned it over. Her intention was to take the batteries out, but saw the little piece of plastic holding the batteries in closed tight with a screw. “You gotta be shittin’ me.”

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

“Why don’t you have an off switch?” Nicole grumbled, needlessly pulling at a small edge of the door in a vain attempt to lift it up and free the batteries. It only seemed to make the ornament more upset.

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

“What the fuck?!” Nicole yelled.

“Well hello to you too,” a voice from the door came.

Nicole looked up and saw Shorty standing in the doorway of the police station. She straightened up and cleared her throat, trying to hide the offending Santa behind her back.

“Oh, hey,” Nicole said. “I was just um-...”

She shrugged, unsure of what to say. It was both a relief and a little horrifying to see him there.

“So,” Nicole sighed. “Do they hate me?”

Shorty just shook his head, smile starting on his lips. “They might have been a bit shocked at first but...they don’t hate you.”

Nicole breathed a sigh of relief, shoulders relaxing a little. “Thank god. And they...don’t want to run me out of town?”

Shorty laughed, a bark of joy, and he shook his head as it tapered off. “Why don’t you let them tell you themselves?”

Nicole froze.

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

Gus came through the station door first, wide smile on her face and a plate of what looked like cookies in her hand.

“Hello, dear,” she said, walking up to Nicole and kissing her cheek. “I already talked to Nedley about setting this up while you’re at work. Wanna keep you company on Christmas.”

She winked at Nicole and headed towards the kitchen. She gestured over her shoulder. “Curtis! Come help me with this table.”

“Coming!” he yelled, walking through the door after her. He smiled at Nicole as he passed and she just stood there shell shocked. Doc came next, Waverly’s tiny, pathetic Christmas tree hoised like a full grown one over his shoulder. Nicole watched as he tipped his hat and went to set the tree down near the station one. Wynonna walked in next wearing a Christmas sweater with Santa on the front holding a beer bottle. She smirked at Nicole as she walked up to her, standing close.

“So, Red,” she said, looking Nicole up and down to make her blush. “You were in love with me before you even knew me, huh?”

Nicole blushed even deeper and blew her bangs from her face. “I just-...was...lonely.”

Wynonna hummed. “A likely story. But I get it I’m...too much woman for you to handle.”

Nicole laughed, heart feeling lighter as some of the guilt ebbed away from her chest. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s it, Wynonna.”

“Probably for the best,” Wynonna said with a dramatic sigh. “I’m much more of a lone wolf. You would have cramped my style.”

“Obviously,” Nicole conceded, still smiling.

The door opened again and Nicole held her breath. Waverly stood in the doorway, brown hair flowing down her shoulders to the red sweater with various Christmas lights on it. When her eyes landed on Nicole, she felt the air leave the room.

“This was her idea, you know,” Wynonna whispered without any attempt at subtlety. “Surprisingly, it wasn’t my idea.”

Nicole just made a noise that was supposed to be in agreement, but it probably just sounded like choking.

“I will graciously step aside,” Wynonna said before clapping Nicole on the shoulder. “So you can go for it.”

Wynonna stepped away without another word and left Nicole gaping at Waverly. Waverly shyly smiled back, lifting up her arm in a small wave. Nicole waved back, palms suddenly sweaty. Waverly’s hand fell back at her side and Nicole noticed her playing with the edge of her sweater.

“Waverly, I-”

“Nicole, I’m-”

They both talked over each other for a moment and paused, chuckling and shifting awkwardly.

“You go first,” Nicole said, taking a step towards Waverly without thinking. Waverly stepped forward at the same time and they continued to blink at each other. “Unless you want...me to go first.”

Waverly shook her head and stepped even closer to Nicole. “I was just going over what I was going to say in my head.”

If possible, Nicole fell even harder for Waverly.

With a sigh, Waverly started. “I’m sorry for...acting the way I did,” Waverly said. “I...was jealous that Wynonna got to have you. You were just...so sweet and kind and attentive and...strong. I can see it in your face. And I was falling for you...fast. I kept forgetting you weren’t mine. And it seemed...not fair that the...person I’d been looking for my whole life had...landed in her lap and not mine.”

The blood was rushing through Nicole’s ears, but she nodded hands itching to reach out and touch Waverly. But she kept them firm at her sides. Hope sprang up in Nicole’s chest and she tried to clamp it down.

“Waverly,” Nicole started softly. “I’m...so sorry I lied to you. I never meant for it to get this far but...spending time with you was more than I ever could expect. It made it so hard to let you go. You’re the smartest, most beautiful girl I’ve ever met, Waverly, and I want nothing more than to let me show you that.”

Waverly rolled her eyes, tears in the corners as she chuckled. She quickly wiped them away before grabbing Nicole by the front of the jacket and pulling their bodies flush. Without wasting another moment, Waverly’s lips were over Nicole’s.

Her entire body erupted in electricity, starting at her lips and flowing all the way down into her toes as their lips moved together. Nicole’s hands found Waverly’s waist, even the hand holding that fucking annoying Santa ornament. But it was the furthest thing from Nicole’s mind as Waverly pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. Her stomach felt warm, filled with butterflies as her mind ran a thousand miles a minute. There was no way this could be real. This had to be some sort of elaborate day dream.

“Ugh, god, Waves, you’re such a bitch! Making out with my ex right after we break up!” Wynonna’s voice pierced their bubble and Nicole pulled away with a blush. Waverly’s hands cupped either side of Nicole’s neck and she kissed the underside of her jaw once before turning and looking at her sister.

“Seriously, Wynonna?” Waverly said.

Wynonna winked at her and turned on her heel. “Low blow, baby girl.”

’Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!’

Nicole could feel every curve of Waverly’s body pressed against her own and she suddenly regretted that her entire family had set up a little Christmas spread in the middle of the station. Gus had put a festive tablecloth over a table and set out cookies, snacks and desserts while someone had started playing Christmas music.

“Wow,” Nicole breathed, watching everyone chat and snack happily. She watched as Doc handed Wynonna a drink, his face lighting up as she took it with a small smile.

“It’s for you,”Waverly whispered, her face pressed to the side of Nicole’s head. Nicole turned, keeping their foreheads together as she looked down at Waverly.

“Thank you,” Nicole whispered, leaning down and kissing Waverly again. “I can’t believe this is real.”

“Merry Christmas,” Waverly whispered against her lips before kissing her again.