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Stiles had never expected to end up like this. Of course, he had had a vague idea of what his future would be (give or take) but he hadn’t exactly planned as far and accurately as this. He hadn’t expected to have his first child while still in university. He’d wanted to wait till he’d at least earned one degree so that he could have his life on track. Juggling school, a side job and a child was a challenge and it left him exhausted by the end of the day.
The pit-pat of feet clambered down the hallways followed by Stiles’ own clunky ones. “Caden! Caden get back here!” he shouted, stomping across his dorm. Bath time was always difficult with the half werewolf boy who was always so defiant about getting into the water.
It was becoming exhausting and Stiles wasn’t sure he had it in him to chase him any longer. He’d had three classes today, two of them being classes where he’d had finals because the end of the semester had closed on him all too soon. And then he’d worked a shift at work and he’d finished late so he’d arrived to the university daycare late and had to stand through a lecture from the same old lady about punctuality. By now he’d just stopped trying to feed her his excuses since she didn’t care that he had to make a living somehow.
“Caden!” he shouted again, catching the door just before the two year old could close his fingers on it.
Stiles squatted down in front of his son, staring at him with a stern gaze. He caught the boy by the shoulders and kept him in place, ignoring the cute, devilish grin splayed wide on his face. “That’s enough now,” he reprimanded, his voice giving no leeway for correction. It pained him to see his son’s smile off his face but he no longer had the patience. “It’s time for your bath. Daddy is tired and needs to sleep and so do you so you’re going to march into the tub and let daddy wash you, do you understand?” he asked him.
He regretted it almost instantly. Though Caden was a lovely boy but he was a wild spirit and when things didn’t go his way, especially this close to his bed time, he had break downs. Those big eyes of his filled with tears and Stiles cursed himself for having been so stern. The last thing he needed was for him to start crying. He almost had hope that Caden wouldn’t burst but his small mouth opened and wails exploded from him.
“No, no, no… Don’t cry,” Stiles pleaded, picking up his nude body. He rocked him up and down as he walked back down the hall to the bathroom. “Please stop crying Caden… Daddy didn’t mean to be mean; he just wants you to take a bath. Stop crying, stop crying!” he begged.
He still had to get him cleaned, despite his cries, and if Stiles waited for Caden to calm down they’d be here till morning. “Stop crying,” he begged, placing the boy in the small seat in the tub and resting his head momentarily against the edge of the bath tub.
There was too much noise everywhere that Stiles missed the door to the secluded door opening. It wasn’t until he heard his name being called that he picked up on the sound of keys falling on the entrance table and the closet door opening.
“Stiles?” Derek called, lumbering loudly down the hallway.
“In here,” Stiles answered, the exasperation clear in his voice.
He heard Derek walk closer to him and when he lifted his head he was standing in the doorway, taking in the scene before stepping in to help. He kneeled next to Stiles, a hand placed delicately on his thigh. “Hey, are you okay?” he asked him quietly and then quickly focusing his attention to Caden.
Through his tears the young boy reached out to Derek, risking the probability that maybe this father of his would take pity on him and take him out the tub. Derek let his small fingers wrap around his own but he made no move to stop the bath early which set Caden wailing all over again.
“I’m going to start crying too if he doesn’t stop,” Stiles whimpered. He moved back to place his head on the edge of the tub, taking in a deep, shaky breath. He had no doubt that Derek understood him. Though his partner didn’t have to deal with balancing school, job and family he still worked up to sixty hours a week sometimes and Caden was a handful for them both. But at least he was a werewolf and could better handle his sleep deprivation. Stiles felt fragile and if anything hit him right now he’d shatter.
Derek nudged Stiles’ head up, cupping his cheek with his unoccupied hand. “Go take a nap…” he murmured to him, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “I’ll finish Caden’s bath, just go and sleep okay?”
“But you haven’t even had a chance to relax yet and – oh shit, I forgot I had an essay due, oh shit! Shit!” Stiles scrambled to his feet, nearly tripping on the carpet as he did so.
The panic was rushing through his head as he tried to make a break for the door but Derek caught hold of his pant leg. He tugged at him and cooed his name till Stiles’ attention was fixated on him. The worried look berated at Stiles’ heart and he chewed his lip as he waited to hear what he wanted to tell him.
“Stiles… Nap first. You can finish everything later, alright? If I come out and find you doing anything other than sleeping I’ll tie you up to the bed,” Derek said. Usually, Stiles would have retorted with something sarcastic about how he wouldn’t have minded Derek tying him to the bed but he was so devoid of all emotions (save distress) that he just nodded.
Silently he bustled out the bathroom, leaving behind Caden’s sniffles and Derek’s deep, crooning voice. Once he was in the narrow hallway he paused and leaned against the door. He picked up on the splashing of water. Only a couple minutes could have elapsed but Caden calmed down with the presence of his other father in the room. Slowly, little bubbly fits of giggles escaped Caden and Stiles felt tears spring to his eyes. Why did Caden always have to cry when only he was around?
Unable to stand hearing the happiness anymore Stiles escaped to the bedroom. He closed to the door as quietly as he could though Derek probably already knew that he hadn’t left till then thanks to his werewolf hearing.
Once in the bedroom he curled up in bed, under the blankets. Hugging the pillow to his chest he forced himself to take breaths so he wouldn’t cry. After a moment he felt okay though there was still the choking sense of failure and anxiety sitting in the middle of his chest.
It felt like forever but Stiles fell into a shallow sleep like that. It wasn’t until he felt the bed dip down behind him that he woke up. Even then he pretended to be sleeping still. He should have known better than to think he could fool a werewolf though. That was exactly how Caden had been conceived. About a year after Derek and Stiles had moved in together in their old apartment he had pretended to be asleep in their bed and Derek had nudged him awake and then clothes had come off, Derek had knotted him and nine months later he’d had his stomach sliced open so they could deliver Caden.
“Stiles,” Derek murmured, nuzzling into his neck.
“Shut up…” the boy snapped weakly. “I’m asleep…”
“Hmm… Whatever you say,” Derek mumbled. He pressed butterfly kisses over the exposed skin at his nape and trailed them up till he could kiss his temple. “Are you okay?” he asked again for what felt like the billionth time.
“I’m fine…” Stiles replied.
It was a half truth he supposed since in that moment he did feel pretty okay but it was only a matter of time before he realized he needed to get his paper done and then he wouldn’t even be able to finish it because Caden would start crying… He’d have to get him ready for daycare in the morning and then it would be time to go to class and…
“No,” he corrected himself, turning on his other side so he could face Derek’s chest. “I feel like I’m unravelling.”
“What happened today?” Derek asked. He pulled Stiles close to him and wrapped his thick arms around his body, making sure he was comfortable before resting his forehead against the top of Stiles’ head.
“Just… E-everything! It’s too much… School and work and… Caden is always crying and that stupid daycare lady always has to yell at me when I’m late but I couldn’t leave work earlier Derek. There was too much to do and now with all these finals – I don’t even know if I’ll be able to make it to the end of the semester.” His breath hitched and Stiles had to close his eyes so he could focus on his breathing. There would be no tears that fell from his eyes, as much as he felt overrun by emotions.
Derek was silent for a long time, and when he finally responded it wasn’t with words. He tapped a finger under Stiles’ chin and brought their faces together. Their mouths pressed together in a chaste kiss that drawled on longer than either had anticipated.
Stiles melted into the embrace, finding the knots in his shoulders loosening slightly. Derek skimmed his fingers over the pale skin on his partner’s arms, humming softly as they lay together.
“I know you Stiles,” Derek finally murmured. “You can do it… If you need help I’ll come home early till your finals are over… I’m sure your boss will understand too if you need to cut your hours a bit. We’ll get through this…”
“How are you always so confident about these things?”
“Because I believe in you… And I believe in us… And even though we’re having a rough time now we’ll get through it… I mean, where do you think we’d be if I gave up every time I got annoyed with your sarcasm?”
“You’d be alone and brooding in an outhouse, trying to get over your emotional constipation.”
“Ha… Very funny Stiles.”
“What? You thought I had suddenly lost my ability to be sarcastic? My sarcasm is the only thing that keeps me alive.”
“Oh? So what am I? Mince meat?”
Stiles’ reply was cut off with a rush of wind that flew off his lips. Derek flipped their positions quickly, straddling Stiles with a leg on either side of his body. His hands had his arms pinned above his head and the look on his face was of playful seriousness. One of his eyebrows rose as if to challenge Stiles and the younger male wiggled to show he wasn’t going to let him win so easily.
“Mince meat happens to be very delicious,” Derek stated.
“Does it?”
“Yeah, it just depends on how it’s cooked.”
“Well, I think I’m screwed because if you’re the chef then we won’t have much to look forward to.”
Derek rolled his eyes and flicked his forehead delicately. Stiles wanted to make another remark but his partner didn’t give him the time of day, cutting him off by kissing him softly. When their lips broke apart their foreheads kept pressed together, the both of them fixating on the rhythm of their breathing.
Stiles felt his heart flutter and he allowed himself to smile for the first real time that day. “I love you…” he whispered.
“I love you too…”
And when Derek flopped down next to him Stiles huddled up to his chest, allowing his body to relax. Caden was in bed, hopefully sleeping, and even if he was going to wake up soon Stiles could take comfort in the fact that for now there was peace and quiet. And he wouldn’t change it, even for all the sleep in the world.