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Hyungwon feels annoyance bubble inside of him as he glances at train schedule display flashing in front of his eyes realising that he’s stuck here for another twenty minutes or so. He sighs contemplating if he should linger around for most of remaining time until his train arrives or grab himself a warm drink to focus instead of a headache hammering his skull.
Hyungwon’s mobile phone is still exploding with notifications of missed calls and texts, and it’s just makes his mood take a plunge for the worst. He ends up briefly scanning through multiple texts ranging from ‘I’m sorry’ and “did I understand it wrong?” to incoherent attempts of expressing how at fault they were with a scowl on his face.
Hyungwon might be obvious at times, lost in thoughts and muting everything around him, but dedicated and passionate enough to excel in his studies. Perfect grades were expected, tests and exams aced without any room for a failure and seriousness about his choice of career reflected and mirrored in people he chose to surround himself with drive to continuously improve. Except, right now at this exact moment, he feels like a fool who just got taken advantage of because of his kindness. He only realised a bit too late that this scheduled tutoring session he went such a far distance for (an extra 2 hour train ride from his university campus) was just a cover up for the other just to flirt his way to make him stay the night and nearly lose his last chance to get back home. He just straight up pushed the other away and bolted out of the door first given chance without sparing a second glance.
A loud announcement echoes through half empty train station reprimanding all the passengers about a train which just arrived. Hyungwon breathes out a sight of relief as he plugs in his headphones wanting nothing more just to go back home and sleep everything off. With lights steps he gets on the train and scans for the most quiet corner to enjoy his long trip back home. It’s not overly packed, but he avoids a group of loud teenagers laughing out loud at some silly jokes and all too loud funny video compilations one of them is playing on his phone to show to others. There’s also a couple in his line of vision who are way too touchy for his liking and doing more skin ship than he prefers (practically having dry sex) at this hour . Hyungwon frowns in distaste as he side steps around the couple who’s luggage is nearly blocking the main path to go further. He sends a sheepish smile to an elderly couple and bows slightly in apology for being so clumsy before speed walking to nearest empty seat he can find.
There’s a guy sound asleep next to a window with headphones on and Hyungwon thinks this is as best as he can get without feeling annoyed and sits down sighting in content at chance to rest his tired legs. He peeks through his bangs at the guy next to him who’s wrapped in a scarf like he’s about to freeze in here with only tips of his ears peeking through slightly. He’s sound asleep without making any noise, head propped up to lean on the cold fogged up window and his hands hidden deep into the warmth of his jacket pockets.
‘Cute’ Hyungwon thinks and smiles at the sight, his body relaxing and unwinding from all the stress he endured all day. He feels weirdly comfortable and at ease as he casts another glance at the his seatmate before taking out a book out of his bag to catch up on reading about criminal justice law for a test which is due tomorrow.
Hyungwon fights back a yawn and urge to rub his bloodshot eyes due to lack of sleep for the past few days he sacrificed for better grades. When he’s about to read another chapter he has yet to fully memorise Hyungwon feels the other boy stir in his sleep to shift around for a bit to ease into a different position. He doesn’t even realise he stopped breathing for that moment until it’s quiet again and he lowers his eyes to a book in his hands but his mind wanders and he can’t focus on anything else at the moment.
He sights running a hand through his hair and nearly screams when he feels a hot breath close to his neck and a body press close against him. Hyungwon freezes and he bites hard on his bottom lip when he feels his cheeks colour in embarrassment and the tips of his ears burn. ‘He’s too close’ his mind screams at him while his heart races and butterflies spread it’s wings ready to spill out of his mouth like a flood of feelings in different colours making his vision blur. ‘Personal space. Has he ever heard of it???’ he whispers silently, but he makes no effort to get away.
Hyungwon is curious and a tiny bit excited as he silently pleads his heart to stay still. He turns his head slightly so he can get a better view of the guy borrowing his shoulder as his pillow. A smile is ready to spread on his lips when he glances fondly at half bundled up male who seems to be around his age or maybe older. Cute nose, flushed cheeks and soft blond hair his long fingers were itching to touch and run through.
Hyungwon heavies as sight and gives up on reading. He carefully lowers his book on his lap so he doesn’t drop it and gives into temptation of sleep by closing his already tired eyes. He feels warmth ghosting over his shoulder like a secure blanket wrapping them both and Hyungwon lets himself relax without minding sharing personal space like this for the first time in his life.
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Hyungwon wakes up to hands roughly shaking him awake. He opens one eye to peer at the face of train ticket inspector and scrunches up his nose in annoyance. He hates the feeling of someone waking him up and he swallows a long list of curses that are threatening to escape past his lips. He blinks a few times and aims a perfect glare at the person daring him to disturb his sleep. That person cowers, tries to smile but fails and just informs in an overly polite voice about reaching a last stop for today and tries to usher him away from his seat.
Hyungwon apologises, words slightly slurred, as he struggles to keep himself awake and tries to stand up, but he loses his footing (his book falling off from his lap on the ground) and his hands try to grab at anything to keep himself stable – and oh god – he yanks the other sleeping guy with him on the floor. Hyungwon is mortified as the blond guy jolts awake in panic and looks around frantically until he pauses at him sprawled on the floor and Hyungwon wants to curl up and disappear because he’s never been so embarrassed and at a loss of words ever in his life.
They stare wordlessly at each other before the other (Hyungwon really wants to know his name) checks something out on his phone (apparently battery long dead) and stops dead in his tracks to face him again with desperate and pleading eyes.
“Tell me this isn’t the last stop. It can’t be the last stop. Fuck. I need to get back home.”
Hyungwon openly stares at him in shock, his hands covering his red as a tomato cheeks (he’s still not over the previous episode) and nervously bites on his lip. “It’s the last stop. I’m sorry.”
He can see the guy go through a mental breakdown and then slump back into his seat in defeat. Hyungwon feels exhausted too and they really need to get off this train before the same inspector decides to comeback with extra help.
“Come on, let’s get out of there” he offers collecting his belongings and placing his book back into his bag. “We’re not supposed to stay here any longer or we’ll get into trouble. Are you okay?”
Hyungwon hears a weak reply of ‘yeah’ and he’s not even sure why he’s waiting for other before he leaves. He offers him a reassuring smile, which is just a small quirk of his lips, and they stand awkwardly staring each other in an empty parking lot unsure of how to part ways.
Hyungwon feels conflicted and confused as he stares at the lost blond guy who clearly doesn’t have enough money to cover a taxi fee ride back home, because he slept through his stop. He looks like an abandoned puppy and Hyungwon really wants to leave because it’s really none of his business, but his feet are glued on the spot unable to move.
A sudden drop in temperature makes him shiver and he feels his hands start to freeze. He peeks at the silent guy, his thick scarf wrapped around his neck to keep him warm, his thin leather jacket and ripped jeans which were really not suitable for this kind of weather this late into the night. He runs his hand through his hair in frustration at his inability to just up and leave and a weird sense of responsibility to make sure the other doesn’t freeze to death.
“I’m Hyungwon. I don’t live that far away from here. Let’s take a walk and then if you’re comfortable enough stay at my place until we figure out what to do with you?”
He’s met with grateful eyes but there’s a flash of caution in there too. “Hoseok. My friends call me Wonho.” A shy smile and a scratch of the neck makes his stomach tingle with an unknown feeling. Hyungwon swallows hard and gestures for them to step forward. He’s trying not to stare, but at the same time he’s obvious to Hoseoks own curious glances thrown his way.
They make a small talk just to dispel the awkward tension lingering around them and Hyungwon already stopped counting all the times his heart skipped a beat when a smile lit up on Hoseok’s face. He feels charmed and love-struck – a new addictive feeling he never experienced before, but at the same time internally screaming and panicking because he didn’t sign up for all of this when he got out if his bed this morning.
Hoseok is older than him and dreams of becoming a producer. A guy who wears his heart on his sleeve, has the most beautiful laughter and the most expressive eyes he sees himself drowning endlessly in.
Hyungwon feels his cheeks heat up again in what seems to be a permanent blush stuck on his face when Hoseok steps up closer to check if he’s okay. Without any thoughts on his mind he wordlessly rushes forward with Hoseok’s laughter is ringing in his ears again and Hyungwon wants nothing more than to curl up under the safety of his blankets and disappear.
Hoseok grins at him, but says nothing more. It’s late into the night and most people in this small town are already fast asleep. They wander around a bit longer ignoring the biting of a chilly weather and Hyungwon (after glancing repeatedly at Hoseok rubbing his hands together to warm up) gathers enough courage to take a hold of others hand.
Hoseok is taken aback, but his eyes are sparkling and a smile blooms on his handsome face. Hyungwon looks down at their intertwined fingers and how small but warm Hoseok’s fingers feel against his own. He hides a smile and yanks the other to walk closer next to him, their shoulders brushing but it’s such a nice feeling that Hyungwon wishes it lasts a bit longer.
When he unlocks the door to a medium sized apartment and invites Hoseok to step inside he knows there is no way to end this without him getting further attached to the older one.
Hyungwon offers him a mug of hot chocolate and they both fall silent again. He grips his mug a little harder than necessary battling his insecurities and fears down, because at this moment he feels as lost as Hoseok and the fact that they’re still strangers lingers at the back of his mind. For some absurd and unknown reasons he’s ready to throw the caution and give himself extra reasons as to why Hoseok’s whole existence is making question his heart and sanity at the same time.
They decide to watch a movie on Hyungwon’s laptop to pass the time. It’s already way past midnight but neither feels sleepy. They’re comfortably sprawled on Hyungwon’s bed and Hoseok’s laughter is still ringing in his ears. Hyungwon feels content, on cloud nine even as he covers his eyes to shield himself from Hoseok’s blinding smiles and his loudly thumping heart ready to burst in many colourful butterflies. His cheeks hurt from all the laughter and smiles he hardly ever offers to anyone, but he can’t stop and he’s beyond enchanted to put a stop to it.
“Stay the night?” comes out before he can take it back and Hyungwon swallows not ready to end whatever connection is growing between them.
Silence greets him, but he can feel Hoseok shifting around in his bed and Hyungwon doesn’t even realise when he holds his breath in anticipation.
“Don’t say it like that!” Hoseok sounds embarrassed, his ears bright red and it’s the cutest sight in Hyungwon’s eyes. He feels like taking a picture to admire it later, but that would be rather rude at this moment.
“What? What did I say wrong?” He blinks in confusion, scratching his neck out of habit.
Hoseok averts his eyes and bites down on his lip. “Not in that kind of tone.”
Hyungwon chuckles and stretches his long limbs like a cat after a long rest. “You’re overthinking. Cute”. Hoseok throws a pillow at him and Hyungwon grabs one of the plushies, a bright green frog, and aims it perfectly to hit at Hosek’s shoulder. Hoseok stares at him in disbelief for a few seconds before he tackles Hyungwon down on his back and renders him and his hands immobile.
They’re both breathless, eyes sparking in unspoken challenge and mouths stretched into wide smiles. Hyungwon is painfully aware of their current quite intimate position, his heart about to leap and spill all the thoughts he shouldn’t have swirling in his head, but yet he still licks his suddenly dry lips staring directly into Hoseok’s eyes.
Hoseok tilts his head to the right side and scans Hyungwon’s face for any signs of resistance and after not seeing any he grins in triumph. Hyungwon’s hands feels warm in his hold and Hoseok could get used to the feeling of having their interlocked fingers more often. He leans in closer, a breath apart from Hyungwon’s lips (just barely ghosting over them) and he has to bite the inside of his mouth not to moan once he feels Hyungwon’s body tremble in anticipation.
Hyungwon feels so hot to under his touch and Hoseok is so tempted to kiss and nibble on the right side of his exposed neck, and he really considers it for a few seconds, before he leans closer to whisper into Hyungwon’s ear: “You smell so nice like a fresh bowl of ramen I want to eat"
Hyungwon is stunned, disbelief and shock clearly written all over his face and he’s that close from strangling Hoseok for ruining the moment. The other grins at him, laughter freely escaping past his lips without any remorse and he leaps across without thinking just to grab Hoseok by his foot (he had to admire his instincts) and drag him closer to glare directly at those eyes full of mischief.
“I could kick you out just for that” he tries to sound mad and fight back a smile.
“You won’t.” Hoseok answers back with confidence.
Hyungwon wants to protest, argue against it but - “I won’t” he whispers silently and hides a smirk when Hoseok rewards him with a smile. “- So I can see you plead for mercy after I’m done with you.” And without a waning reached for Hoseok’s sides.
“Wait, Hyungwon. I said w-wait!”
Hoseok’s pleads fall deaf on Hyungwon’s ears, because he’s too concentrated on finding all the weak spots he can at this very moment. He feels Hoseok writhe and twitch under his touch in attempt to slither out of his grasp. Uncontrolled loud laughter rings in his ears and he can feel Hoseok fleetingly lose control after he stops ticking the other without any mercy. They fall back on the bed in a pile of tangled limbs with sparkling eyes and heaving chests. It’s late, and his studious side screams at him about wasting his precious time of studying with a stranger at his house and the importance of an exam he is supposed to take this morning. When Hoseok glances at him with his flushed cheeks and affection swirling in his eyes Hyungwon stops breathing and, suddenly, he can’t remember anything except loud thrumming of his heart.
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Hyungwon stays up to read through his notes and extra reference material despite his whole being screaming at him ‘let me sleep’. He’s past the point of exhaustion but his diligent self won’t ever forgive if he turned up to that exam not prepared. He can’t allow himself not to pass.
Hoseok stirs with a sound of his alarm going off and Hyungwon winces, because it’s so loud and his head feels like it’s splitting in half. He shuffles to make some coffee, he needs and extra strong one to survive this morning, and wordlessly offers some sandwiches to Hoseok with his coffee.
They’re quiet, but it’s a welcome quiet. Hyungwon finds himself relaxing, tension slowly leaving his body and Hoseok’s apologetic smile and soft eyes makes it all worth in the end. It’s bittersweet, but Hyungwon embraces last minutes they spend together at his apartment watching Hoseok eat and wonders why all of this can’t last just a little bit longer.
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It takes about five minutes to reach train station and Hyungwon silently curses himself for not taking a longer roundabout way, because he’s not sure he’s ready to say good-bye's yet. They see a few people already lingering around with takeaway coffee and his fingers itch to feel some of that warmth too.
Hyungwon nearly screams taken aback when strong arms wrap around his waist to pull him closer just right before they find the right platform. Hoseok’s laughter rings in his ear and Hyungwon feels his cheeks flush out of embarrassment, but the strong grip around his waist remains. He bites his lip and leans back savouring the feeling of being held so intimately and ignores that persisting ache in his heart.
A loud announcement rings through about next approaching train and regular safety measures before everyone boards the train. Hyungwon stiffens, the realisation of their separation finally sinking in and he fights the urge to just cling to Hoseok and never let go. His bites on his lip hard and struggles to string something coherent to say instead of word vomit swirling in his head. Hoseok, on the other hand, spins him round a few times, flashes him a blinding smile while grabbing his face to pull him into a quick kiss and then bolting away to board a train right after.
Hyungwon stays glued on the spot, his head spinning and cheeks colouring bright red thinking to himself ‘what the fuck did just happen?’ and silently freaking out because he’s on the verge of having a heart attack. It’s not until the train starts moving away from the platform Hyungwon realizes, albeit a bit late, that he has no way to get in contact with Hoseok again. Panic settles, and he feels so frustrated at himself for not asking his number or add him on any kind of social media sites. He’s such a fool. An idiot. And he’s so lost, because he really wants to see Hoseok again.
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It’s late, it’s cold and Hyungwon never wished the world to end as he does now. He’s dragging himself home like a zombie past the point of exhaustion and borderline delirium. Irate, frustrated, headache hammering at his skull with each step and he wants nothing more than to curl up under his blankets and sleep his life away. His exam went okay considering the amount he studied in comparison to his regular in-depth preparations, no doubt a passing grade, but nothing to boast about either. Teachers giving him extra material to study up for this extra credit he badly needs and his classmates pestering him with bullshit questions and reasons he had no energy to entertain.
A tired sight leaves past his abused lips (he has a habit of chewing on them when he’s stressed) and he’s so glad he’s nearly at home. His tired eyes squint at someone crouching on his doorstep, and, for a split second, he thinks he’s already seeing things in his sleep deprived state of mind when he spots a blond boy wearing thin leather jacket and bundled up in the same thick scarf. Hoseok.
Hyungwon feels his heart doing flips and warmth spreading all over his limbs and body when those affectionate eyes stare back directly at him.
“What are you doing here?” Hyungwon winces at his own rough and scratchy voice, his headache still pounding at his skull.
Hoseok looks sheepish, tips of his ears flushed bright red and cheeks dusted in faint pink. He scratches his neck out of habit, and licks his lips. His hands shake a bit as he lifts up a boquet of vibrantly coloured flowers to gift to Hyungwon. “Guess who missed his stop again?”
Hyungwon can’t help when a smile curls up on his lips and this time, he’s the one who wastes no time to pull Hoseok in for a kiss.
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