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Tony and Bucky sat next to the Christmas tree, surrounded by miscellaneous parts. It seemed impossible that the holder of multiple PhDs in various engineering fields and sciences could be stumped by a child’s toy. Bucky could hardly stop laughing. Tony Stark defeated by Barbie.
Their 8-year-old daughter, Maria, was currently obsessed with all things Barbie. Her Barbie collection had extended to 40 dolls. There were Barbie cars and Barbie boats and Barbie condos and a Barbie camper. Barbie had a bicycle and horses and dogs. Barbie had shoes. Oh my god, so many shoes.
Nothing would do this Christmas except a Barbie Dreamhouse.
Seven years ago, Bucky and Tony hadn't dreamed they would make it to a Christmas Eve spent assembling an impossible toy. Seven years ago, they had been less than a week away from withdrawing their application for adoption. The service had refused them at every turn. Tony had a wild and public past. His stint as Iron Man had not improved his chances. Bucky had The Winter Soldier to thank for his own dismissal. Even in the 21st century, two men weren't at the top of the list for available babies. All the money in the world can’t buy a positive opinion on their potential parenting skills.
During the week that they finally decided they were going to give up, they were granted a miracle by the universe. A little girl left behind in an AIM lab. No-one could find any records of who she was or where she came from. AIM had burned all of their files and melted their computers on their way out. There was a strong probability of her having been a test subject of some kind. Too much of a risk for a “normal” couple while also being a problem for foster care. Tony and Bucky were allowed to petition for her adoption.
She was amazing from day one. The doctors guessed her age as 11 to 13 months. Tony declared her new birthdate to be the day they signed the papers making her theirs. They threw a big “birthday” party and announced their parenthood all at once. Maria could speak quite a few words, could even string them together in simple sentences. She could walk and almost run. She wasn’t potty trained, but she also wasn’t neglected in any way they could tell. She was a healthy, well cared for child. They loved her instantly.
Being the only offspring of any of the Avengers, as well as the only child of Tony Stark, Maria was spoiled for possessions. She had everything she could ever want. To keep her level-headed, she had small chores and responsibilities around the tower. Keeping her room neat, making sure the bots were in their charging stations before she went to bed, and helping whenever there was clean-up happening in common areas. A few times a month she helped Steve and Bruce when they went to do volunteer work. Bruce was teaching her a little about basic first aid at the free clinic. Steve took her to help at animal shelters. Overall, she was a good kid who made their lives complete.
Making her life complete had somehow culminated in Tony and Bucky in a screaming match on Christmas Eve. The instructions that came with the Dreamhouse were possibly the worst instructions ever printed. And Bucky had helped Steve assemble IKEA furniture last year. The house was in more than 50 pieces and the "manual" was two pages of tiny print and misleading drawings. The plastic tabs refused to go in the plastic slots. Sections bent instead of standing straight. The elevator was in backward. Tony was getting more and more frustrated. He had ranted until he was red in the face about how many engineering degrees he had and that he would not go down over some plastic architecture.
Bucky had tried to placate him, after all, Tony didn’t have a degree in architecture. Tony took it as patronizing and challenged Bucky to do better. Bucky did not do better. There were now more parts on the carpet than there had been before. He had no idea where those had even come from. Two sections had snapped in half when he tried to separate them. The worse he failed to help, the more he laughed. The laughter was contagious and Tony soon joined him in no longer taking themselves, or Barbie, seriously.
It was a very long 5 hours later when Bucky helped a stumbling, exhausted Tony to bed. Maria was bound to be up in less than 3 hours and her Dads were going to be bleary-eyed zombies.
There was, however, a fully assembled Barbie Dreamhouse under the tree.