Archive of Our Own ^beta

"Hyung, you have to see this." Yoongi should have thought better than to indulge in the shenanigans revolving around the two men rushing up to him, but the worry in Taehyung's voice made him dismiss his inner voice. He picked his head up from the comfort of the sofa just in time for Jimin and Taehyung to come barreling into either side of him. "It's about Jungkook."

"Don't tell me this is about his stuffed animals again." Yoongi groaned, but his words were promptly ignored in favor of having a phone shoved into his face. He squinted at the screen, making quite the ugly expression as he did so. Jimin chewed his lip anxiously as he watched Yoongi remain stoic upon reading what was in front of him.

“Did you read it?” Taehyung questioned, clearly impatient with the lack of reaction coming from the elder.

“Yeah,” Yoongi sighed. “What’s the big deal?”

Jimin jerked his phone away with his eyes bulging at the lethargic reaction. “Are you serious? Have you not been paying attention to anything Taehyung and I have been telling you about?”

“The only thing the two of you have been capable of talking about lately is how you think Jungkook has a taste for murder because of the way he holds his stuffed animals.” Yoongi stated, concern for the two completely diminished.

“Hyung, he’s been strangling them!” Jimin corrected.

Taehyung nodded in support of his statement, adding on his own thoughts to it as well. “Everyone’s seen him doing it. I swear, he’s just been buying stuffed animals only to choke them.” His voice fell as a pout settled on his lips, sharing a look of worry with the man beside him. “It’s morbid.”

Yoongi pushed himself off the couch and away from the smothering contact between the two. “Let me ask you this,” He started, taking a moment to stretch out comfortably. “Do you really think that our Jungkookie wants to seriously kill anyone?” Taehyung and Jimin both turned to each other and locked eyes as Yoongi stepped towards the center of the living room. He contemplated just sprawling out on the floor since the two took up his space on the couch but decided against it. Yoongi didn’t bother to try and understand the telepathic conversation the pair were having, instead interrupting it with another question. “Let me ask you one better. Do you really think Jungkook would actually want to hurt any one of us?”

“Well…” Jimin started, but his thoughts died out on his tongue. He sunk in on himself as he let his eyes fall to the floor, clearly having no argument against Yoongi’s words.

Taehyung’s gaze fleeted over towards the man standing in the center of the room, a look of worry knitting his brows together. “Still, isn’t it something to be concerned about?” He questioned.

“Look, Jungkook has his own way of figuring himself out. Maybe this is just one of his things, alright?” Both Taehyung and Jimin seemed to deflate at his words, clearly still concerned about the weird hobby Jungkook had suddenly picked up. “It could be a way for him to relieve some stress, just leave it alone.”

“If it was just the stuffed animals, I probably could.” Taehyung stated, reaching over towards Jimin and snatching his phone from him. He then turned the screen towards Yoongi as if he hadn’t seen what was on it just a moment ago. “But this is what’s really worrying me! Who googles ‘I want to choke my hyung’? like that?”

Yoongi rolled his eyes. He guessed in some weird way he could understand why they were so concerned, but it seemed obvious to him that Jungkook wouldn’t want to ever actually hurt anyone. “Uh, dark humor enthusiasts maybe? Honestly, I bet that was so he could screenshot it and send it to Jin for annoying him too much.”

“That does sound like something he would do…” Jimin agreed through a mumble. He let out a sigh and turned to face Taehyung again, another moment of silence settling among them as the two had a second telepathic conversation.

“So you really don’t think we should be concerned?” Taehyung questioned.

“No,” Yoongi said through a puffy sigh, his head dropping to the side to deliver the two with a rather scolding look. “If Jungkook starts buying things like rope and tubing, then maybe.” The look of worry transformed into alarm on Taehyung’s face but Yoongi spoke again to keep him from spitting out whatever thought sprouted in his mind. “And what the hell are the two of you doing going through his search history anyway? I thought you both knew better than to do something like that?”

“Well--"

“--You see--”

Yoongi held a hand up in front of him to stop them both from spouting excuses. “Don’t do it again.” He scolded. “I don’t care how concerned you are for him, we don’t invade each other’s privacy.”

Taehyung let out a sigh of defeat as he returned Jimin’s phone, clearly feeling guilty about having done what he did. Jimin seemed to feel the same way, curling in on himself as he looked down at the phone in his hands.

“Now if the two of you actually want to know if anything is bothering him, maybe you could go and ask--” Yoongi’s words cut off abruptly as the three of them caught the sound of the front door opening up. It echoed through the hall, the shuffling of plastic bags accompanying it. None of them could see who had come home from where they were in the living room. Yoongi figured that was probably why all three of them went dead silent and bug eyed, waiting to see who might have walked in on their conversation.

Soft footsteps pattered down the hall, the light steps enough to tell Yoongi who had just come home. Taehyung and Jimin immediately darted their heads away from the entrance to appear casual as Jungkook walked into view, two large bags clumped together around his wrist. He took a glance over the room, his gaze landing on Yoongi with the warmest smile creeping on his face. “Hey hyung.” He greeted softly.

Yoongi immediately darted his gaze away from the brunette, clearing his throat to try and pretend his smile didn’t just make his stomach jump. “Hey, kook.” He returned the greeting, eyes falling down to the bags wrapped around Jungkook’s wrist. He pointed a finger at it. “Just get done shopping?”

Jungkook pulled the bag further to his side like he could hide the contents of it more than they were already hidden. Yoongi already had his suspicions of the purchases based on the plush looking baby blue fabric poking out of the top. “Uh…” He stalled, chewing his lip. “Yeah just--bought some stuff. For my room.” Jungkook hung his head low, his hair falling into his face and barely hiding the red that flushed his cheeks. “You know like--to decorate. Not anything weird or whatever.”

Yoongi raised a brow at his strange replies, but he didn’t call him out on it. Taehyung and Jimin were failing miserably to look as uninterested as possible, Taehyung leaning over the arm of the couch to try and get a better look at the bags in Jungkook’s hands. Yoongi was tempted to kick him, but he wasn’t close enough. “Do you want any help?” He offered. “Hyung will help you if you need it.”

Yoongi didn’t miss the way Jungkook’s cheeks flushed a darker red, or the way he immediately shook his head back and fourth to turn down his offer. “N-no, it’s okay. It’s super easy to uh--it’s just putting them on something, it’s fine.” Yoongi opened his mouth to reply but Jungkook was already taking steps to slip away into his room, offering a quick wave goodbye to the three men in the living room. “I’m just gonna--go uh…. put these up.”

“Okay…” Yoongi mumbled as he watched Jungkook rush down the hallway to get to his room. He stared after him up until he heard the sound of his door closing, then quickly snapped his attention towards the two sitting on the couch.

“See!” Taehyung yelped, throwing a hand towards Jungkook’s room. He was squirming on the sofa, like he couldn’t decide to stand up or not. “That was weird, right?”

“Hyung, that was weird.” Jimin reiterated with emphasis. Neither of them were going to let him convince them otherwise.

Yoongi opened his mouth for a rebuttal but snapped it closed again. He heaved a light sigh, quirking his cheek to the side as he mulled over Jungkook’s behavior. His eyes drifted over to the two men who were waiting on his response with heavy anticipation and wide eyes. His shoulders slumped low in sign of defeat. “Okay, yeah that was a little strange.”

Jimin kicked his feet forward as he threw his shoulders back against the couch, letting out a noise that seemed to be a mix of victory and frustration. Taehyung pointed a long finger towards the eldest. “You get why we’re concerned now, right?”

“Sure?” Yoongi shrugged. He rubbed his chin as he chewed his lower lip. “What did you say you two saw him doing with those toys again?”

“Trying to pop their heads off.”

“Ringing their necks.”

“Ah,” Yoongi hummed, clicking his tongue. He nodded to himself a few times, earning a raised brow from Taehyung and bulging eyes of expectation from Jimin. “I’ll handle everything with Jungkook, alright?”

“How?” Jimin asked, appearing offended at the idea of Yoongi excluding the two of them from his plan.

“Don’t worry about it.” Yoongi advised, moving to join them back on the couch. He settled in between the two of them without bothering to explain himself, leaving Jimin and Taehyung to sit in curiosity and frustration. “And stop going through his things.” He added on as an after thought.

///

There was a sadistic part of Yoongi that thrived at the decision to leave Jimin and Taehyung out of the plan he came up with. Dealing with them prodding him for answers or hints to his plan was as amusing as it was annoying, but he had his reasons for intentionally leaving them out of it. The first was that he had a general idea as to what Jungkook was doing with his stuffed animals, but he didn’t want to jump to any conclusion without confirming it. The second was that the answer he had for Jungkook’s behavior was a little personal so he didn’t think it would be fair sharing it if he was right.

The less sadistic part of Yoongi was highly interested in exploiting the situation as much as he could, but in order for him to do that he needed everyone else to stop thinking so much about it. Taehyung and Jimin didn’t make that easy on him after deciding to go to the others about it when they realized Yoongi was leaving them out to dry. He heard them spouting out their worries more than once to everyone else throughout the past week as well as most of the other members reactions to it. Jin laughed over it and replied with “If he tries to choke me, I’ll just choke him back!” while Hoseok had shut Taehyung and Jimin down rather quickly. “Maybe if the two of you spent as much time on your choreography as you do stalking Jungkook, you wouldn’t have been so off beat at practice the other day.” (Yoongi was sure that one had cut Jimin pretty deep.)

Namjoon hadn’t expressed much opinion on it, mostly brushing the pair off whenever they tried to bring it up to him. Yoongi figured he didn’t have anything to worry about based on everyone’s reactions but he was frustrated over one thing. That one thing was that he was still somehow the only person that had yet to witness Jungkook in the act of apparently choking out his stuffed animals.

Originally, Yoongi hadn’t even tried to come across Jungkook or his growing plush collection, but all he heard about over the past week was how often everyone else walked in on it. It made him start to actively seek Jungkook out in hopes of seeing what it was everyone else caught. Hell, it even made him leave the dorm for his shopping purposes as opposed to waiting for things to be shipped to him online.

Yoongi was currently on his way home after forcing himself to go outside to retrieve some much needed cords for his studio. He was walking down the hall with his bag in hand while his thoughts were else where. The idea of collecting stuffed animals didn’t make that much sense to him, but the more he thought about it, the more he could understand it. Stuffed animals were cute and soft and usually pretty comfortable to sleep with so maybe Jungkook was realizing he was missing something in his life and the plushies were a substitute for it? Yoongi himself was a man that craved physical contact more than he felt he should, but he typically found a way to satiate that craving. His method usually consisted of tricking the rest of the members into holding his hand (or just outright demanding it) but it was easier to get away with that when they were in front of cameras and he could pull it off as a joke.

Maybe Jungkook had the right idea by using plushies to substitute for his lack of physical affection or maybe that was just Yoongi projecting his own problem onto the situation. He didn’t know, he just knew that he wanted someone to hold his goddamn hand when the touch starved feelings hit him.

Yoongi sighed to himself as he stepped up towards the door of their shared dorm room. He pulled it open, wondering how he let his thought process drift so hard. He dragged himself through the door, the plastic bag around his wrist crinkling with each step. Yoongi didn’t expect anyone to be out in the living room, since it was a time of day where the members would either be sleeping or indulging in their own interests. He was struck with surprise when he stepped around the corner and found himself locking gazes with a pair of large doe eyes from the kitchen.

Jungkook looked as if he had been caught doing something wrong, his face tight with guilt. The expression made Yoongi dart his attention downward, eyes widening just slightly at what made the brunette appear that way.

Jungkook had a cat designed plush seated on the counter with his hands wrapped tightly around the neck of it. The fabric strained together at the grip of his hands, his fingers strapped over one another while he squeezed the lack of life out of the stuffed animal. Yoongi’s lips parted just slightly as he processed what he was staring at. The only thing that jarred him from the moment was how quickly Jungkook jerked his hands away from the plushy.

Yoongi’s eyes shot back up to meet Jungkook’s and the two found themselves in an unsettling and long silence. Jungkook was like a deer frozen in headlights, waiting for Yoongi to question what it was he was doing. Yoongi shook himself from the initial surprise of witnessing the brunette choking a stuffed toy, brushing off the moment the best he could. He pointed a finger towards the cat plush as he walked towards the hallway that would take him to his room. “He’s cute.” He commented, not letting himself wait around to see Jungkook’s reaction.

Yoongi darted for his room, the image of Jungkook’s hands wrapped around that plush’s neck burning heavily through his mind. He thought about all the concerns Taehyung and Jimin had but found himself biting his lip to keep from laughing. They thought Jungkook had a curiosity towards murdering someone, but Yoongi knew exactly what that was.

Jungkook had a choking kink and he was using stuffed animals as his method to experiment with it.

///

Yoongi had been locked up in his studio for the majority of the day. He knew Namjoon had been here when he arrived, but with how many hours had passed, he doubted the person rattling his door knob was him. Yoongi wouldn’t have caught the sound if he hadn’t just pulled his headphones off a moment ago. He spun in his chair to open the door for whoever was there but when he faced it he watched it get pushed open without his help.

That told him who it was right away since there was only one other person that had the password to his studio.

“Hey hyung.” Jungkook poked his head just barely passed the door, the slightly red tint to his eyes immediately sprouting alarm all throughout Yoongi. “Is it okay if I hang out in here for a bit?”

“Yeah, of course.” Yoongi replied, not taking his eyes off the younger as he slipped in with his head hanging low. He was sucking on his bottom lip, the mole just under it the only thing Yoongi could see clearly. He remained quiet as his gaze followed Jungkook to the futon tucked against the wall. Jungkook dropped onto it, immediately reaching for one of the pillows and bringing it to his lap to tuck against his body. If that wasn’t a big enough cue to tell Yoongi something was wrong, he didn’t know what would be. “Did something happen?” He asked carefully.

Jungkook tucked his chin under the top of the pillow, curling up into a ball in his spot on the couch. He shook his head in reply to his question, his eyes hidden by his bangs. Yoongi wasn’t going to push him, knowing Jungkook struggled to express himself almost as much as he did at times. He was sure if Jungkook knew the right words to explain his feelings, he would have said them.

Yoongi kept his eyes on him for a moment longer in case he did decide to speak but when he was met with only silence, he figured the best thing to do was to turn back to his computer and give Jungkook the space he needed. Sometimes all anyone needed was a presence to comfort them and Yoongi was more than willing to give him that.

He couldn’t sink back into the project he was working on though, his mind too focused on Jungkook’s presence. He took glances over his shoulder to check up on the brunette, but he hadn’t barely moved since he arrived. Yoongi figured maybe twenty minutes had passed before he even shifted in his seat.

“Hyung?” Jungkook called out eventually, his voice quiet. Yoongi snapped his focus towards the man, ready to give him all the attention he needed. Jungkook didn’t lift his head up, his voice muffled by the pillow as he spoke. “Do you think I’ve become more aggressive lately?”

Yoongi blinked in surprise, completely sideswiped by the question. “Do I think--- you? Aggressive?”

“Yeah.” Jungkook replied, his voice strained. It told Yoongi that he was completely serious about his question.

“No.” Yoongi responded with a shake of his head. “Not even a little bit. Maybe when you’re playing a game but every body gets a little competitive.”

“No, not with games.” Jungkook sighed, a slight hint of frustration in his tone. He sat back against the futon, bringing his legs up with him. “Everyone has been acting like I’m going to hurt them lately and I want to know what I did to make them scared of me.”

“What?” Yoongi squinted as he tried to think back on any time anyone had genuinely been afraid of Jungkook. “Kook, no one is scared of you.”

“Tell Namjoon hyung that.”

“Namjoon?” Yoongi gawked. If he was surprised before, this took it to a whole new level. “Namjoon said he was scared of you?”

Jungkook finally pulled his head out of the pillow but he couldn’t bring himself to look towards Yoongi. His brows were knit together, his lower lip pouting outwards as a thousand thoughts danced over the edges of his face. If Yoongi had to narrow it down to one emotion, he would easily describe it as hurt. “He didn’t say that exactly, but he might as well have.”

“Kook, what did he say?”

Jungkook squeezed the pillow slightly tighter to his chest and shrugged a shoulder. “He sat me down to have a talk about how concerned he was with the things I’ve been doing lately.”

Yoongi cocked his head just slightly, trying to make sense of this. Namjoon wouldn’t just do an intervention like that without talking to everyone first and he hadn’t heard anything that would have been alarming enough for Namjoon to act that way. The only thing he could think of was if Taehyung and Jimin had something to show him that would have caused him to react so quickly. All they had was a fear of Jungkook’s stuffed animal purchases and the stupid google search---

“Oh, fuck me.” Yoongi sighed to himself, causing Jungkook to snap his eyes towards him. “Kook, ignore everything Namjoon said to you, okay?”

“What?”

“Just ignore it. I know what it’s about and Namjoon is just highly misinformed.”

“Misinformed enough to think I need to have a talk about my aggression outlets?”

Yoongi opened his mouth to reply, but he paused in an attempt to be cautious to Jungkook’s feelings. He brought his eyes to lock with the brown pair staring back at him, Yoongi wondering how on earth Namjoon could even start that conversation with how soft and innocent they looked. He let out a sigh as his shoulders dropped, coming up with an alternative solution to this problem. “You wanna go out for a drink?”

Jungkook’s body slumped in relief in sync with the sigh that left his lips. “God, yes please.”

“Alright. Let me just save this and then we can swing by the dorms and get dressed.”

///

Yoongi already knew that Jungkook would be ready ahead of him but he didn’t expect to find the guy knocking on his door before he had even figured out what shirt he was going to wear. He stood in his closet, scanning the hangers for something he could throw on quickly. His eyes landed on one black shirt at random, plucking it off the hanger with little care.

Yoongi quickly pulled the shirt on, taking a glance in his mirror at how it looked. He thought about changing it but as his eyes landed on how exposed his neck was, suddenly it became the best thing he ever could have picked. He rubbed a hand over his throat, flashes of Jungkook’s hands around that cat plushy popping up in his mind. His lips parted at the thought of introducing Jungkook to his choking kink properly but before his mind could finish that thought he found his attention snapping towards the sound of the door creaking open. “--aren’t answering so I’m just coming in.”

“Sorry,” Yoongi huffed as he came out of the closet, flapping the bottom of his shirt to get the cloth to sit right. “I didn’t hear you.”

Jungkook pursed his lips upon seeing Yoongi in a half ready state, his expression slightly disappointed. He scanned over the clothes he was wearing and then looked down at his own choice of apparel. The washed out jeans and untucked button up combination was starting to feel like a far lazier choice than he intended it to be now.

Yoongi walked over to his vanity desk and pulled open one of his many drawers for his accessories. He didn’t really want to go too heavy on it but as his eyes landed on the shine of one of his chokers, a sudden idea sprouted. He threw on a couple of bracelets along with one long necklace, setting them just right before turning towards his choker collection. He could feel Jungkook’s eyes on him, the younger probably starting to get impatient with how long it was taking for Yoongi to get ready.

Yoongi drummed his fingers against the wooden surface, licking his upper lip as he plucked a chain designed choker from his collection. He dangled it for a moment, enjoying the way the light twinkled off of the metal. “Jungkook?” He called, turning around to face the younger. Jungkook looked up at him expectantly from his place he had taken on Yoongi’s bed, lower lip caught between his teeth. He hummed in response to his name, Yoongi holding the choker out towards him. “Think you can help hyung out with this?”

Jungkook’s lower lip fell back into place after forcing himself to stop biting it, eyes falling onto the choker Yoongi extended towards him. He pushed himself off the bed and stepped forward, taking the choker from the elder’s hand. “I thought we were just going out for drinks, what’s with all the jewelry?” He questioned.

Jungkook rotated the choker properly in his hands and held it up, waiting for Yoongi to turn around but the man never did. Instead, he merely tilted his chin upwards, baring his neck for Jungkook to wrap the choker around. Yoongi tried to keep himself from grinning by digging his tongue into his cheek, pleased at the hesitation in the younger’s movements. “I feel naked without any.” He commented.

Jungkook didn’t seem to process his words, his large eyes zoned in on the detail of Yoongi’s throat. His lips parted just slightly as he scanned over the smooth skin expanded in front of him, his hands hovering over his collar bones with the necklace dangling between his fingertips. Yoongi cocked a brow at his expression, the urge to tease him hard to suppress. Jungkook visibly swallowed, finally prying his eyes away from Yoongi’s throat only to be caught in his gaze. It felt like he was being called out with that look alone, but it wasn’t in a bad way. It was almost like a dare, or a game of chicken between them.

Jungkook coughed and angled his head downward, bringing the choker towards Yoongi’s neck and carefully fastening it together. He pulled his hands away quickly, patting them against his thighs as he stepped backwards. There was the hint of a blush blooming across the bridge of his nose, Yoongi taking that as a victory towards the half-assed plan he only just thought of a moment ago. A win was a win regardless.

“Could’ve made it a little tighter.” Yoongi commented as he brushed his finger tips across the metal chain around his neck. Jungkook’s eyes snapped to the motion of his fingers gliding along the metal links, catching his lower lip between his teeth as he watched. He brought a hand to his mouth and coughed into it, clearly trying to keep himself composed. Yoongi suddenly felt way more powerful than any person should now that he was completely sure of the reason Jungkook had invested so much into his stuffed animals.

“S-so,” Jungkook started, tripping over his words for a moment. “Where are we going for drinks?”

///

Yoongi felt people often didn’t give Jungkook the credit he deserved when it came to his intelligence level. He was teased frequently about his unique way of thinking and Yoongi tried his best to keep others in check over it. (Namjoon typically did a better job at it than he did unfortunately, but he didn’t mind that.) Jungkook didn’t have an intelligence that was as abstract and clear like Taehyung’s was or as obvious as Namjoon’s was so Yoongi often felt like the brunette was labeled as dumb because of it. Yoongi knew he wasn’t. In fact, Yoongi liked to think that Jungkook had one of the more important types of intelligence there were. He had a knack for understanding--a way to figure out how things worked. He assumed it was what made Jungkook so good at everything he tried. He was just so unbelievably quick to pick up on things that he made it look like it came naturally to him.

With all that being said, Yoongi had to think that maybe he gave the brunette too much credit and perhaps Jungkook really was the biggest fucking idiot to exist. He had been trying for weeks now to get Jungkook to open up to him about his stuffed animal collection (read: choking kink) but nothing he had been doing was working. Yoongi didn’t know if he could be any more obvious than he had been. He started off with teasing the brunette by asking him to do things like massaging his neck, helping him with chokers, and tightening ties. After that he tried a different approach, finding any chance he could to casually bring choking up into their conversation but Jungkook just blushed profusely and changed the subject. As far as Yoongi was concerned, Jungkook was an idiot that couldn’t pick up on the most obvious of hints.

Yoongi was exhausted at this point, figuring the only way he could get the brunette to open up about his choking kink was if he called him out on it--so that’s exactly what he went to do. He stood outside of Jungkook’s door, impatiently sighing to himself as he waited for the man to answer. He knew he was in there, and he knew he pounded hard enough on the door for him to hear. Yoongi threw his fist against the door a second time, pulling his hand away when he picked up on the sound of foot steps.

Jungkook cracked his door open just slightly, only a sliver of his face visible. “H-hey hyung,” He stammered, clearly sounding flustered. “Did you need something?”

“Yeah, I do. Let me in.” Yoongi demanded, taking a step forward fully expecting Jungkook to open the door for him. He was surprised when he was met with resistance instead.

“U-uh it’s just--” Jungkook stuttered. “My room’s a bit messy and I should really clean--”

“Oh come on,” Yoongi sighed, rolling his eyes. “It’s nothing I haven’t seen before.”

Jungkook chewed his lip, clearly against the idea of letting the man into his room. He was quiet for a long moment before he let out a sigh of defeat and finally pulled the door open enough to allow him room to step inside. Yoongi was happy he didn’t put up a fight, but the second he walked through the door and actually looked at Jungkook’s room, he immediately understood why the younger didn’t want him in there. He had stuffed animals littering every surface there was and then some. There was a collection of plushies stuffed in two whole corners of his room while his bed was overflowing with them. His shelves had some thrown haphazardly along them and his closet door looked like it couldn’t be closed properly due to over flowing with them.

Yoongi did a quarter turn to face Jungkook, his expression shocked enough to not have to ask anything. Jungkook stood at the entrance of his room, gnawing on his lower lip and holding his arm while looking absolutely guilt ridden at what was surrounding the two of them. It was like staring at a puppy in the center of his own destruction and Yoongi had no idea how to address it.

“I know!” Jungkook cracked, keeping his eyes trained on anything that wasn’t Yoongi or the stuffed animals. “I have a problem, I know! There’s a lot of stuffed animals and it’s getting to be too much but hyung--” The brunette let out a shaky sigh, still avoiding his gaze. “--you don’t get it! I need them for something and it’s weirder to say what that is then…all this.”

Yoongi’s shoulders slumped, pity filling his gut at how panicked Jungkook looked as he explained himself. He took in a deep breath and figured the best thing he could do was to just jump right to the point of his visit. “I get it, Kook.”

“No, you don’t--”

“--Yes, I do.” Yoongi interrupted. He took a glance over his room again, definitely finding the amount of plushies excessive, but he understood. Tried to, at least. “You like choking.”

Jungkook blinked, his posture looking only a fraction less tense than a moment ago. “I--” He stammered. “What?”

“You got a choking kink, right?” Yoongi repeated, explaining himself better. “That’s why you’ve been choking these stuffed animals all the time, isn’t it? It makes you feel better about experimenting with it because you’re not actually harming anything, right?”

Jungkook stared at Yoongi looking dumbfound. His mouth was hanging open, his expression completely void of any emotion. It was like he wasn’t aware of the reason behind his collection and Yoongi had just explained it to him. Hell, maybe he actually didn’t know and he just put the brunette into some self reflective state of being.

Yoongi gave him a moment to respond but after he blankly stared at him for a couple of minutes, he worried Jungkook might think he was going to judge anything else he had to say. “It’s okay, you know. It’s really not a bad thing to be into choking, hell it’s probably pretty com--”

“--I don’t have a choking kink.” Jungkook’s voice was tight, everything about his aura telling Yoongi that was a lie that neither of them believed.

Yoongi cocked an eye brow at him, giving him a moment to retract his statement. “Really?” He questioned with heavy sarcasm. “You don’t?”

Jungkook sucked on his lower lip, barely able to shake his head. Yoongi hummed to himself, taking a step closer towards him. Jungkook tensed up with each slow step Yoongi made, his eyes darting anywhere but at the man in front of him. The elder stopped just at his side, his shoulder lightly bumping against Jungkook’s. He brought his hand up towards the man’s collarbones, sensually walking his fingers across the dip of it and up along his throat. Yoongi was very clearly mimicking a dance routine of theirs, his thumb and forefinger snapping to either side of his throat while he leveled Jungkook with a heavy gaze. Jungkook sucked in an audible gasp, his entire body tense.

“So,” Yoongi started, his voice intentionally low. “You wouldn’t want me to be putting any pressure down now, do you?”

“Hyung--” Jungkook’s voice was incredibly breathy and strained, Yoongi almost felt guilty for putting him through this. He took in a shaky breath to try and calm himself down, having to close his eyes to compose himself. “--Are you trying to make fun of me?”

The spell between them instantly broke with his words. Yoongi’s eyes went wide at the accusation, immediately snapping his hand away from the man’s throat. “What? No, no, no.” He sputtered. “Why would you think that?”

“Because you’ve been doing it for the past few weeks.” Jungkook replied, opening his eyes to meet the other’s gaze. “Like with the necklaces and massages and stuff…”

“You--You thought I was making fun of you with that?” Yoongi questioned, the look Jungkook gave him making him feel a massive wave of guilt. “Oh god no, Kook.” He shook his head, trying to explain himself. “I was just trying to get you to talk to me about it.

“What?” Jungkook’s brows knit together in confusion, his head cocking to the side just slightly. “Why would you want me to do that?”

“Because…” Yoongi turned his attention to the floor, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. He suddenly didn’t feel so confident about the plan he had now that he had failed to take into account Jungkook’s feelings. “I wanted to make an offer with you.”

Jungkook tilted his head further, wordlessly asking for an explanation. Yoongi glanced up at him but quickly darted his attention away. It didn’t feel right suddenly, but if he had really been making Jungkook feel bad about his interests over the past few weeks then the least he could do was to give him an explanation.

“I..” Yoongi began, unsure of how to really propose his offer. “I thought that maybe…If you wanted to, I could teach you how to properly restrict someones breathing without hurting them and in exchange you could…” He trailed off, wincing at himself as he struggled to spit out his end of the offer. Jungkook stared at him with huge eyes, worry lining the edges of his expression at what Yoongi was about to propose. “…hold my hand?” He finally spat out.

Jungkook blinked.

The two stood in silence for a moment, Yoongi feeling embarrassment start to crawl up the back of his neck with each second that stretched on with no reaction. Jungkook’s mouth parted and closed multiple times as his brain tried to process the proposal he was given. He continued to gawk at Yoongi until finally the older man felt too embarrassed by it and tried to take it back.

“Okay--Never mind, we can just forget that I said anything. I’m sorry for making you feel like I was making fun of you for your--”

“--You’re serious?” Jungkook interrupted, his voice soft.

Yoongi swallowed down the rest of his sentence, recognizing how heavy the air between them suddenly became. It made sense. The two of them were both sharing something personal about their own needs with each other when neither one of them would ever admit these things to anyone else if they were asked. Jungkook’s face held so much suspicion in it but there was a layer of hope lining it as well. He wanted Yoongi to be serious, even after how ridiculous the request sounded.

“Yeah.” Yoongi replied, carefully keeping his voice level. Jungkook’s eyes didn’t leave his for a moment, the dark and almost endless brown searching for any hint of a lie with in his features. His posture relaxed after deciding to trust Yoongi’s words.

Jungkook turned his head away, chewing his lower lip as he mulled over what the next step to this situation would be. “Um…” He squeaked, swallowing down the lump of nerves lodged in his throat in an attempt to sound more sure of his decision. “How would we…? Like, should we set ground rules or something?”

Yoongi felt his own wave of relief wash over him at the younger’s willingness to adhere to his strange request. He mentally fumbled over Jungkook’s question, not thinking he would actually get this far so soon. He opened his mouth and let out a noise similar enough to a hum as he mulled over what things they should talk about with this whole set up. “Well,” He puffed up his cheeks as he exhaled, regretting the lack of preparation he had. “No weird stuff.”

Jungkook narrowed his eyes at him. “…Choking isn’t weird?”

“I mean like,” Yoongi backtracked, waving a hand in front of him. “I don’t want this to get taken too far. I’m in this for the hand holding, not to…get off or something.”

“You seriously want your hand held that badly?” Jungkook questioned.

“Hey, you’ve got no right to judge me when you started yourself some freaky plush collection for the sole purpose of choking.”

Jungkook shrunk in on himself at the retort, attention darting to the floor. “I was trying to find the right one…” He mumbled.

“It’s okay, Kook.” Yoongi sighed, disliking how defensive he became from his teasing. “It’s really not that weird.”

“You’re not convincing at all.” Jungkook replied, his voice soft. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other while still awkwardly chewing at his lower lip. Yoongi realized then that he was going to have to do most of the leading with this.

“Why don’t we start this slow, alright?” Yoongi suggested, reaching forward to gently grab hold of Jungkook’s hand. It was soft and warm and pretty much exactly how they always were, but the contact still managed to wash Yoongi over with warmth. “We don’t have to do anything until you feel okay with it. And if you suddenly decide you don’t want to do it anymore, I’ll pretend like this whole exchange never happened. Is that okay?”

“Yoongi, you’re literally holding my hand right now.” Jungkook pointed out. “Your end of the bargain feels a lot less threatening than mine does.”

“Well…” He didn’t want to let go of the man’s hand but Jungkook gently pulled it away as he eyed him. Yoongi brought his palms together to try and make up for the lack of contact, but it didn’t really do the trick. He licked his lip in thought, wondering what he could offer to put Jungkook at ease. “Holding hands is kind of weird though, right?” He tried, but he knew neither one of them were going to buy that.

“It’s really not.” Jungkook replied sternly. “You can easily go on camera and hold all the hands you want and be just fine. If I just came out there and started choking people, everyone would think I’ve gone mental.”

Yoongi winced, his words making him think back to the small intervention Jimin and Taehyung had given him. It would probably hurt Jungkook if he told him about how the two thought he might have for a moment. He decided to keep that information to himself, his exhale holding the slightest hint of frustration with it. “You know, this whole choking thing is just as risky for me as it is for you.” He pointed out. “Shit if that somehow got out, I would probably be the one to take most of the heat for it since I’m older than you.”

Jungkook whined slightly in response, but he didn’t have anything to counter him with. He looked to be leaning into the idea more, but Yoongi wasn’t sure what he could finally say to completely convince him. “You’re gonna make me demand more from you, so you better take the offer while it’s still easy.”

Jungkook rolled his eyes, trying to decide if it really would be worth the risk. He figured either way he went, Yoongi was still going to leave his room knowing the reason behind his plushy purchases. Besides, he was just trying to help him out after all. It would only benefit him to accept his proposal but the idea of actually doing it was what was making him hesitate.

“Kook,” Yoongi urged, a teasing tilt to his tone. “If you don’t say yes or no soon, I’m going to expect some forehead kisses along with it.”

“Okay, fine!” Jungkook fumbled, squeezing his eyes shut like he could block out his additional proposition. “But just to the hand holding!” Yoongi chuckled at his quick response, immediately squashing down the part of him that was screaming to find a way for him to repeal his firm decision against his additional proposal. He had to take this one step at a time.

“Alright.” Yoongi smiled, hoping to ease the tension that was clear in Jungkook’s posture. He figured the further they stepped into it, the sooner he would relax but he didn’t want to take it too far too quickly. “Now why don’t we actually come up with some basic rules then?”

///

The rules the two had come up with were pretty simple but expected to be followed no matter what. Rule number one was not to tell anyone else about this without the other person’s permission first.

Rule number two was no choking in front of cameras--even if it’s in a playful way.

Rule number three was that their sessions had to be carried out behind locked doors.

Rule number four was that it was never to happen in Yoongi’s studio. Jungkook thought it was odd how persistent he was about that rule specifically, even arguing that it would be the best place for it. Yoongi’s response had been to shake his head at him and explain his reasoning very bluntly. “I don’t want to be sitting in front of my sound board trying to make a beat just to have it ruined because I can’t stop picturing myself getting choked out.”

Rule number five had been the most important rule--to Yoongi at least. It took the two of them almost thirty minutes of bickering before finally settling on it but rule number five was as follows; Hand holding had to last no shorter than twenty minutes and had to be at least four times a week. If Yoongi had it his way, he would’ve made it a daily thing but Jungkook pointed out too many “issues” with it. (Yoongi refused to believe there actually were any, but he still had to compromise.)

With all that being established, it was way more difficult to actually begin the process. The two of them were both incredibly awkward around each other, Yoongi feeling so uncomfortable that he had to drag Jungkook into his room to try it. (That was also because when he went to lay on Jungkook’s bed, he swore it was worse than laying on concrete.)

Now that they were both sitting awkwardly on Yoongi’s bed, he didn’t know where to begin. A part of him hoped Jungkook would somehow work up the nerve to start it, but he knew that would never happen.

“Um,” Yoongi scratched the tip of his nose, attempting to convince himself it wasn’t as awkward as it felt. “So…What do you know about choking?”

Jungkook visibly winced at the question which in turn made Yoongi cringe. On one hand he was glad it didn’t feel sexual between the two but on the other, it felt way too much like a parent sitting their kid down for ‘the talk. “Hyung, this is really awkward. Maybe we should just forget about this whole thing.”

Yoongi’s mind ran blank at his words. He felt like he should be reassuring him of their ordeal but he couldn’t deny how much easier it would be to just pretend their interactions about this whole thing never happened. How was Yoongi supposed to teach Jungkook anything if all he was doing was contributing to the tension in the air between them? If Jungkook was going to build any confidence with this kink of his, then Yoongi had to bring the confidence into it for him.

Yoongi closed his eyes as he took in a deep breath and focused on dispelling the uncomfortable weight sitting heavy in his gut. He licked his lower lip and nodded to himself a few times, ushering the nerves out of his system. It was just like shaking off his nerves before a performance, except for an entirely different purpose. He took in one final deep breath and then pulled his eyes open to turn and level Jungkook with a stoic expression. “I’m going to choke you,” Yoongi announced, causing Jungkook to immediately snap his attention away from him, his eyes going wide. It was rather blunt and very unlike Yoongi to do in a situation that involved being completely genuine but it was the only way they were going to get anywhere. The brunette brought his hands together in his lap, shoulders tucked in on himself and lower lip instantly caught between his teeth. He looked so tense and uncomfortable and it made Yoongi feel like running out of the room but he needed to get him to ease into this more comfortably. “And I’m doing this because I’m gonna get my hand held one way or another.”

Jungkook probably would have laughed at him if he wasn’t so uncomfortable with what was going to happen. He bounced his foot as he twisted his fingers nervously around one another, taking quick glances towards the man beside him. The idea of choking had been appealing to him when he discovered how much he liked the way his hands slotted around a plushie’s neck, but a stuffed bunny was in an entirely different playing field than a living and breathing person. He wanted to experience it but now that he was faced with the opportunity to, his stomach was tight with anxiety and mind firing off every reason not to.

Yoongi watched the way he vibrated in place with nerves for a minute, studying just how anxious he was about this whole thing. He supposed it wasn’t exactly normal to delve into a person’s kink with someone they considered a close friend but Jungkook’s nerves were on a whole different level. He sighed and then reached across his lap to softly place his hand on top of Jungkook’s, hoping to provide him with some kind of comfort. “Bun, you’ve gotta relax.” He cooed, hoping the man would come to trust him.

Jungkook’s bouncing leg immediately ceased its movements, his eyes staring down at Yoongi’s hand resting on top of his. He took in a deep breath through his nose and then slowly slipped two of his fingers around Yoongi’s index, hoping to relay his feelings to the other through the contact. He knew Yoongi would take care of him through this process and he knew the man never would have offered him this deal if he didn’t plan to take it completely serious. He was just having trouble convincing himself of these facts, even with how much he trusted the man.

Yoongi smiled at the action, finding it difficult to restrain himself from taking full hold of his hand. He gave Jungkook a moment to settle down and then adjusted himself so that he was almost directly facing him. He pulled his hand away from Jungkook’s, bringing his fingers up towards his neck and lightly dragging his middle and index fingers up his trachea. Yoongi moved slowly, hoping to gauge the other’s reaction as best he could by his body language alone. He knew Jungkook wasn’t going to be very vocal about how he felt unless Yoongi outright demanded it so he made sure to pay extra attention to his expression.

Jungkook visibly shivered at the movement along the middle of his throat, his shoulders tensing up but in a way that helped build Yoongi’s confidence with moving them forward. His eyes fell to his neck, watching his fingers press softly into the skin underneath them. “You know this is pretty dangerous, right?” Yoongi huffed, his voice low.

Jungkook swallowed a lump in his throat but nodded in reply. He knew a lot about choking, but he had no first hand experience and that made him feel like he knew nothing. In some people’s eyes, that probably would translate to him not knowing anything about this process but he kept that thought to himself. Jungkook tried to bring his focus to whatever words Yoongi had to say to him but he couldn’t take his attention away from the heat left by his touch.

The longer he studied Jungkook’s body language the more Yoongi found that he really liked the way he sat on edge for him. It was some weird power hungry side of him that started to poke out but he found it more rewarding to give Jungkook what he wanted instead of holding it over him. There was something incredibly satisfying about digging out the man’s biggest desires and showcasing it for him. He slipped his fingers across his throat, letting his thumb fall against the side and then sliding his hand upwards. Yoongi lightly pressed into either side of Jungkook’s neck a couple times, hoping to point out the area he landed on. “You can feel that, can’t you?” He questioned, lightly applying pressure to the spots under his finger tips. Jungkook nodded his response a second time but Yoongi lightly shook his head. He knew the other felt awkward about speaking and starting this whole situation in general but Yoongi wanted him to understand how important vocal communication was going to be between the two of them. “Kook, I need you to speak.”

“Y-yeah.” He stammered, his voice tight. He couldn’t really tell if there was still an awkward air between them anymore or if he was just worked up because of where Yoongi’s hand was.

“Good,” Yoongi praised, even offering a light smile at his response. It made something weird tighten in Jungkook’s stomach but he couldn’t be bothered to pay it any attention right now. Instead, he focused on Yoongi’s lips as they softly smacked together before he spoke again. “They’re the arteries in your neck. If you’re ever gonna choke someone with no intention to kill them, that’s where you want to do it.” He explained, very passively brushing over his comment about possibly murdering someone. He flexed his fingers briefly and then pushed his purlicue into Jungkook’s trachea, causing the brunette to jerk his head backwards at the brief pain. “Hurts, doesn’t it?”

“It definitely didn’t feel good, that’s for sure.” Jungkook replied, wanting to rub the spot Yoongi pressed against but couldn’t due to the man’s hand being in the way.

“It shouldn’t.” Yoongi chuckled, pulling his hand away from Jungkook’s throat just to brush his fingers along the spot he attacked. “You don’t ever want to choke someone there, it can do so much harm to them even if you don’t kill ‘em.” Jungkook knew all about the damage that could be done from his martial arts training but he wasn’t going to speak up about it. He liked hearing Yoongi explain it to him. “Besides,” Yoongi brought his hand away from Jungkook’s neck completely, bringing it to his lap. “We can’t have any harm being done to your pretty singing voice, can we?”

“Well I didn’t have any plans to choke myself, hyung.” Jungkook teased, pointing out that if he was ever going to be choked it would be done by Yoongi.

Yoongi arched his brow at him, tilting his head to the side. “For now, yeah.” He commented. “But if you’re ever gonna hook up with someone that wants to try it, you should know how to correct them.”

Jungkook’s expression fell at his words, the thought completely pulling him out of the moment. He didn’t know why the concept of another person doing this to him made him feel so uncomfortable, but it did. The way Yoongi so passively said it to him didn’t help either. It was like it was a definitive thing that would occur at some point in the future but Jungkook found that he really didn’t want to think about that. The idea of someone choking him for arousal purposes made his whole body feel gross. That wasn’t what he wanted out of this but that realization just seemed to further confuse Jungkook. If he wasn’t into the choking for the sexual purposes then what the hell was drawing him into it?

Jungkook turned his head to face Yoongi, eyes taking in his flat expression. He watched the way his lashes fluttered as he blinked, a flash of recognition appearing in his dark eyes at the face Jungkook was making. His lips fell open in the slowest but softest way possible, something Jungkook didn’t think he would find so interesting to watch.

Yoongi cleared his throat and turned his head forward, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. “Why don’t we stop here for today?” He suggested, leaving Jungkook to assume the man must have felt uncomfortable under his gaze. Jungkook immediately hung his head down, eyes on his lap as a wave of embarrassment hit him. He didn’t really want to stop but they couldn’t risk doing any damage to the relationship they had with one another.

“Okay.” Jungkook reluctantly agreed, at the very least grateful that they hadn’t given in to their awkward personalities and ditched the entire thing.

Yoongi’s eyes snapped towards Jungkook’s hands is response to the motion of them twisting around one another again, his nerves high apparently. He wouldn’t have been surprised to find him chewing on his lip or bouncing his foot in a minute. Yoongi dropped his hand on top of Jungkook’s again, this time slipping the man’s hands apart so he could slide their fingers together.

Jungkook huffed out an airy laugh, a soft smile on his lips as he stared at their contact. Yoongi brushed his thumb along Jungkook’s and smirked. “I told you I was gonna get my hand held, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, I guess you did.” He replied with a fond voice.

///

The hand holding was a lot easier to ease into than the choking but they managed to find something that worked for them. Jungkook was more informed than Yoongi would have expected but he figured with all the time he spent researching editing software and tutorials, the man would know how to find the information he needed. It really all came down to how scared Jungkook was to do it, Yoongi pretty much having to force the man to apply pressure every time they practiced.

“We’re gonna do something different today.” Yoongi declared after letting Jungkook into his room and watching him make his way towards the bed. Jungkook froze in place, one knee bent upwards and ready to climb into his mattress.

“Uh…Like what?”

Yoongi kept his next words locked behind the crooked smile on his lips as he crossed his room and came to his bedside. Jungkook watched him closely, not moving a muscle as the man slipped around him and climbed into his bed. He laid out comfortably, tossing his pillows to the side and sighing peacefully to himself. He was really stretching this on way longer than Jungkook cared for.

Yoongi patted the sheets to encourage Jungkook to follow him into bed, the brunette hesitating due to the words he left hanging between them. Still, the brunette listened. He crawled over Yoongi’s body, moving to lay beside him only to find a hand gripping his bicep and keeping him from doing so. “Ah, ah.” He tutted, indicating for Jungkook to hover over him.

Jungkook stared into his dark eyes, looking slightly unsure of where he was taking this. It wasn’t new, they had done things this way before but it never started this way. Typically, the pair would be standing and Yoongi would be demonstrating or instructing on how to restrict his breathing. It would go on for a few seconds until they moved to the bed and continued from there. For some reason, cutting straight to the bed made everything feel off to Jungkook. It was taking him back to their first session and how awkward it felt at the start of it.

Still, he listened. They had a bit of practice now but the biggest thing Jungkook learned was to wholeheartedly trust the thin man he was currently climbing over. He placed his hands on either side of Yoongi’s head, careful not to catch any of his hair and pull it. His knees were on either side of his hips, turtling over the man.

Yoongi waited for the brunette to get himself as comfortable as he could before he himself moved. He stared over Jungkook’s features with a shine in his eyes that the brunette tried hard not to find addictive. It was difficult to look away from but somehow even more difficult to stare at. Yet, in the same moment of darting his attention away, Jungkook found that he didn’t get nearly enough of that fond gaze.

Yoongi’s hand moved from beside him, bringing a thumb up towards Jungkook’s face and brushing it just under his lower lip. “You’re gonna chew a hole through your lip.” He chuckled, Jungkook not even realizing he had clamped down so hard on it. He immediately released his lip from the hold of his teeth, Yoongi’s thumb slipping over it as he did so.

“Hyung…?” Jungkook heaved. He couldn’t help but to feel like this was progressively more intimate than their previous sessions.

Yoongi inhaled softly, letting his hand fall from his face and back beside him. His fingers found Jungkook’s flat palm quickly, lightly wrapping around the man’s pinky on instinct at this point. Jungkook glanced to the contact, not at all bothered by it any more. Prolonged contact with people often made something tighten awfully in his gut. He had cravings for it too of course, but sometimes it felt like his cravings would clash with his uncomfortableness and he would be stuck in this weird tense in between. Somehow though, the hand holding he did for Yoongi dislodged those feelings and Jungkook found just how pleasing a simple contact like that could be.

He thought it was so silly at first, a man wanting to have his hand held badly enough to educate someone else on their kink but Jungkook understood it now. It made Yoongi comfortable and warm and some how so incredibly soft. If holding hands with him meant that Jungkook got to watch Yoongi fall into that safe space of his, he didn’t think he would ever ask the man to let him go.

Jungkook wondered if perhaps those feelings Yoongi went through were leaking into his own system. He found that he craved the contact a little more every time. Before it used to be hard to keep hold for longer than five minutes, whereas now neither of them were even bothering to keep track anymore.

“Jungkook,” Yoongi cooed, his index finger lightly stroking the brunette’s pinky. “I’m not going to give you any help this time, alright?”

Jungkook’s lips parted momentarily, eyes widening for a brief second. “Y--” He shook his head, his bangs swaying with the motion. “--but how do I know if I’m hurting you or not? What if I take it too far and--”

“--I’ll do something if you take it too far.” Yoongi interrupted. “But I trust you. Besides, if you ever find someone that’s into this shit as much as you are, it’ll kind of kill the mood if keep asking them if they’re okay.”

“--But you said to always--”

“--always pay attention to make sure your partners okay, yeah I know.” Yoongi finished his quote with a hint of sarcasm to it. “But it doesn’t always have to be verbally, Kook. I know you know about this stuff, you just need to stop being so scared. Safe words and body language are your best friends here.” Jungkook took in a deep inhale, his nerves calming for just a moment. Yoongi spoke again to keep him from stressing himself out any further. “I’m not gonna say shit after this so you better start strangling me.”

Jungkook giggled, ducking his head down for a moment as he composed himself. He trusted that Yoongi was right, but he couldn’t help to think back to weeks ago when Namjoon pulled him aside to discuss his “increasing aggression”. Maybe that conversation planted a seed of doubt inside Jungkook, and maybe it blossomed into something that made him scared of this kind of thing. Maybe Namjoon did more damage than he did good when he voiced his concerns but maybe Yoongi was helping him work through that, even if he wasn’t aware of it.

Jungkook licked his lower lip and then brought his focus towards Yoongi’s bare neck. He swallowed thickly, all the dreadful thoughts immediately escaping him as his eyes ate up every detail he could of Yoongi’s features. He had smooth skin, but there were rough patches from what looked like possible razor burn just along his jawline. There were light blemishes under his chin and ear, something that makeup easily covered up. Even with all the minimal flaws, his skin was still glowing and soft and Jungkook found that he really liked touching it. He liked wrapping his hand around it and feeling the subtle movements of Yoongi’s swallowing, or taking in what little air he could.

Jungkook brought his hand towards Yoongi’s throat, his fingers falling into place against his arteries almost like second nature now. Yoongi’s eyes fluttered for a moment, his mouth falling open as a sigh passed his lips. His body went completely lax, his fingers still softly stroking Jungkook’s other hand.

Jungkook gave the man a moment to gather his breath, hesitation creeping into his body at the thought of not having Yoongi’s guidance. He forced it down as he applied the slightest bit of pressure, cutting off his blood flow and gauging Yoongi’s face very carefully. He watched his eyes widen just slightly before they drooped down. He paid attention to the way Yoongi’s fingers continued their soft and rhythmic brushing along his pinky. He went through the list of everything to look out for, releasing the pressure on his neck almost completely to allow Yoongi to gather air again. Jungkook counted the seconds down before pressing into him again, his stomach doing a strong flip at the wheezing that came from him a moment later.

Jungkook paid attention to everything, but once he was sure that he was doing things correctly he went through his mental list a second time. He double checked and triple checked every little giveaway that Yoongi had taught him about, and the second he realized he was doing things as correctly as he could, he finally lost the tension in him and really allowed himself to enjoy it.

Jungkook liked choking, but ever since Yoongi and him had started this deal of theirs he learned more about himself than he would like to admit. He found that the idea of wrapping his hand around the throat of someone else felt so wrong. He liked choking, but he discovered he especially liked choking Yoongi. Maybe even exclusively liked it. Jungkook wouldn’t let himself think like that, but Yoongi made it so hard sometimes when he stared up at him through half lidded eyes.

Jungkook felt so many emotions flow through him during these moments that he wasn’t really sure what to classify them as. Sure, there was the tingling sensation that trickled down his spine and straight to his dick but there was also something completely different that Jungkook liked so much more. There was a lingering airy sensation that started deep in his gut but bubbled through his veins and boiled in his heart. He didn’t dare think about what it was but it was such a strong and addicting sensation.

Jungkook’s eyes soaked in everything below him. The glossy shine to Yoongi’s lower lip from the way his tongue darted out a moment ago, the slowly tinting rosey color to his cheeks the longer he restricted his breathing, the slight tussel to his soft hair--it all made his blood tingle in the oddest way. He loved how it made him feel and he wanted to find all the ways to intensify that feeling even more.

Jungkook zoned in on the motion of Yoongi’s fingers against his skin, deciding on a whim to slip his legs down across the mattress and rest his body as much as he could against Yoongi’s. He rotated his free hand to slip right into Yoongi’s, their fingers locking together immediately--instinctively. It shot another rush of affection through him.

Yoongi gasped inwardly, his mouth widening just slightly as he wheezed in the air that Jungkook released to him. His brows curved inward at the pressure of Jungkook’s body against his, his grip to the brunette’s hand tightening. Jungkook released his pressure on Yoongi’s neck almost immediately, worried that he might have gone too long without giving him air but he was quickly shaking his head in response to his action.

Jungkook returned the pressure, watching the way Yoongi let his head fall back against the mattress. They hadn’t ever been this close in contact before when doing this. One of them had always been hovering over the other. Feeling Yoongi’s chest huff up against his and collapse back down made Jungkook wonder how he ever managed to make it through their past sessions without this close contact between them. He found his addiction was growing more and more unsatisfied with each inch of distance between the them. The contact between their locked hands made his craving calm only slightly. He wished there was a way to get closer to Yoongi but all he could manage to do was to squeeze his hand back with just as much intensity as he received.

Yoongi struggled for air, his throat bulging for just a moment. It immediately made Jungkook relieve pressure once again, finally recognizing a rhythm in his breathing pattern. He fell into the rhythm, barely needing to follow Yoongi’s cues at that point to know when to allow the air flow again. Jungkook found himself chewing on his lower lip again, eyes unable to pry away from the messy expression below him. Yoongi’s bangs had fallen to a part when he dipped his head backwards, Jungkook’s large eyes falling to his exposed forehead. He was overcome with the strongest sensation to do something to it but before he could even recognize what the sensation was, he was already reacting to it and pressing his lips straight to the expose skin.

In the matter of seconds, the safety net they had built around themselves suddenly came crashing down onto them. Jungkook slowly pulled himself inches away from Yoongi, their eyes meeting and both wider than saucers. Neither of them knew how to react and the only thing that ran through Jungkook’s mind at that moment was how much he had just ruined this entire thing between the two of them.

He could only take the silence for so long. Jungkook pulled his hands away from Yoongi, rushing to push himself off the man and hopefully get the chance to run straight out of his room. He was halted almost immediately, Yoongi’s grip tight but gentle against his tricep.

Jungkook wanted to yank himself away from the touch, but he could feel that same wave of warmth rush through the area of contact that he had begun feeling with Yoongi recently. He hung his head low and away from Yoongi’s face but the man’s fingers fell softly against his chin and directed him forward. His eyes met the dark and triangular pair below him, but the shock that was in them a moment ago was completely gone. Instead, he found that same look of endearment in them that was there when they first started this. “Koo…” Yoongi cooed, slipping his fingers along Jungkook’s jawline to eventually cup his cheek. “You didn’t ruin anything.” He reassured.

The amount of relief that washed through Jungkook at that moment almost made him want to throw up. Maybe pass out even, hell probably both. There was something so absolutely comforting about how well Yoongi understood him. He didn’t even have to say a word and the man was already beating away the negative thoughts planting themselves in his mind.

Apparently the relief was noticeable, Yoongi giggling in response to the way the tension left Jungkook’s body. His thumb stroked his cheek softly, quickly adding to his reassurance. “I asked you to do that anyway, remember?” Jungkook didn’t at first, but the memory of Yoongi standing in his bedroom and calling him out for his weird plushy collection came to the front of his mind. “I just thought I was going to have to do a lot more convincing than this to get you to come around to it.”

Jungkook scoffed, a giggle following suit. He immediately hid his face into the crevice of Yoongi’s neck, completely flopping against the man. Yoongi chuckled at his reaction, his hand immediately slipping into his hair and brushing through it in a comforting manner. “Why we don’t stop here for today, alright?”

“Can I stay like this for a bit?” Jungkook questioned, his voice muffled against Yoongi’s skin.

Yoongi huffed the lightest laugh, finding it funny that he felt like he even needed to ask. “You can stay as long as you want but I better get some hand holding in too.” He didn’t need to see Jungkook’s face to know he had just rolled his eyes at him.

///

“So are we all just going to gloss over Yoongi’s bruises or are we actually gonna talk about it?” Yoongi’s shoulders dropped in exhaustion to the sound of Jin’s voice, regret filling his soul for forgetting to wear some kind of scarf.

“There’s nothing to talk about.” Yoongi stated, turning away from all the eyes on him.

“Yoongs, I can literally see the imprints of someone’s fingers around your neck.” Jin pointed out. “Clearly someone’s been strangling you but I just want to know if that’s willingly or not.” Jimin and Taehyung gasped simultaneously at his words, bringing a long groan out of him. He might not have been as good as an instructor as he thought he was when it came to teaching Jungkook about the safest way to choke someone. Jin wasn’t dropping the subject either unfortunately. “If it’s willingly, you gotta tell whoever to calm their ass down, like that’s really noticeable.” Jin stepped closer to Yoongi to get a better look, his lip rising in concern at the bruise across his neck.

Honestly, Yoongi didn’t know how it happened. Jungkook seemed like he had been doing a great job with his restraint, but maybe Yoongi enjoyed the whole process more than he realized and actually caused Jungkook to gravely misread his necessity.

Hoseok let out a rather annoyed sigh at the conversation. “I swear to God if the lot of you could keep a quarter as much attention on practice as you do on people’s personal lives, we could cut our sessions down in half.” He shook his head as he stepped out from the kitchen with a beverage in hand, making his way to the couch with a look of slight irritation on his face. Yoongi felt partially to blame about that since no one could keep focused on their practice earlier between Jungkook’s absence and recognizing the marks on his neck. “Before, it was all about Jungkook and his dumb plushy collection and now it’s about Yoongi’s damn choking kink.” He paused his rant to take a sip of his drink, the taste of his beverage giving him a moment to let his irritation leave him. Hoseok let out a heavy sigh as he flopped back against the couch, deciding it wasn’t worth it to rant any further.

The click of a tongue brought Yoongi’s eyes darting towards Namjoon who sat on the love seat perpendicular to Hoseok. The second he took in Namjoon’s expression, Yoongi felt his face flush with embarrassment. He may not have been able to understand Taehyung and Jimin’s telepathic communication but he unfortunately shared the same wavelength with Namjoon.

Right now that wavelength was dropping a huge “What the fuck Yoongi” on him.

At least I didn’t decide to sit Jungkook down to discuss his aggressive behaviors--

--Clearly that was the right thing to do if your neck has anything to say about that--

--There’s a difference between exploring a kink and actually harming someone--

--It doesn’t look all that different to me, Yoongi--

“--What the hell is going on? Is everyone glitching?” Hoseok cut in, eyes shifting between the other five members in the room. Yoongi snapped his attention away from Namjoon, glancing over towards Taehyung and Jimin to see that they must have been in their own non-verbal conversation.

Jin rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders, dropping into the seat beside Hoseok and deciding to not even worry about whatever was happening now. “I’ve given up on trying to understand.”

“That seems like the smartest thing to do.” Hoseok sighed in agreement, deciding to just ignore the rest of the people in his room in favor of going through his phone. “Now that I’m thinking about it, where is Kookie?” He questioned, glancing up from his phone and across the faces around him.

“He’s out donating all the stuffed animals he purchased.” Yoongi replied.

“What? He doesn’t need to strangle his plush---” Hoseok cut off what he was about to say once the connection between his bruises and the plushies had been made. His phone dropped from his hand as he leveled Yoongi with a stare that made him feel the lightest pricks of embarrassment.

Unfortunately, Hoseok wasn’t the only one in the room to make that connection. In fact, it seemed like everyone had now. Namjoon making faces at his phone that were definitely intended for Yoongi while Taehyung and Jimin looked to be fighting back every urge in their body to tease him. Jin tsk’d at the realization and said “This’ll be fun.” as he dug his phone out of his pocket.

Yoongi didn’t know how to react, his cheeks turning red from embarrassment. Their first rule they came up with had been not to tell anyone but now everyone in the group knew about it. Explaining how this happened to Jungkook was only going to intensify his embarrassment too.

He didn’t know if it was lucky or not but all movements in the room went completely still when Jungkook’s whistling could be heard from the front door. Yoongi could only hope that everyone would gloss over what they just learned and not immediately confront him about it.

Jungkook came around the corner with his hands empty. His hood was pulled up and face looking particularly exhausted. He had been gone all morning but Yoongi didn’t think setting up a drop off for his stuffed animals would be that draining. Jungkook’s eyes widened when everyone’s attention snapped to him, alarm in his expression.

“How’s it going, strangler?” Jin greeted which just caused the entire room to erupt into a hot mess. Hoseok smacked Jin from beside him, causing the eldest to laugh and try and correct himself. “Stranger. I meant stranger.”

Jimin and Taehyung bounced up from their seats and swarmed a stunned Jungkook, both already falling into giggles and teasing comments.

“So you’re trying to kill Yoongi-hyung?”

“We can help you out with that, Taehyung and I have our own plans we wanna run by you--"

“--Your own what?” Yoongi interrupted.

Jungkook completely ignored the people around them and snapped his attention towards his right, eyes narrowed in on Yoongi. “You told them?!” He squeaked, his cheeks burning red. “You told all of them!?”

“No!” Yoongi immediately yelped in retort. “I didn’t say anything!”

“He did.” Taehyung, Jimin and Jin all echoed in unison. Jin’s boisterous laughter only grew louder at the way Yoongi glared at him.

Hoseok had apparently had enough of the whole situation, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. “Oh, knock it off!” He demanded, fanning at Jimin and Taehyung to step back from the youngest. “Yoongi didn’t say anything.” He clarified, but pointed a finger at the man nonetheless. “His neck did all the talking for us.”

Jungkook’s eyes traveled from Hoseok’s finger and towards Yoongi’s neck. His mouth fell open as a soft gasp passed by his lips. Yoongi immediately scrunched in on himself, already worn out from all of the attention that had been on him from today. It was supposed to be a period where they could all relax yet it felt like he hadn’t gotten any chances to do that. Jungkook swallowed back whatever words he had, clearly not comfortable talking about it in front of everyone else. He began chewing on his lip instead, looking just as ready to run away from the situation as Yoongi felt.

“I thought Yoongi might have been in trouble with someone.” Jin chuckled.

Namjoon finally pulled his attention away from his phone with a heavy sigh. He shot a look over towards Jin which immediately made the eldest bite his lip in an awful attempt to quiet down. Namjoon turned his attention to Jungkook then and spoke in a much softer tone than anyone had today. “Kook, I think it’s great that you decided to donate all the stuffed animals you’ve been collecting. I’m sure that’s going to make a lot of kids really happy, and I’m proud of you for that.”

Jungkook’s cheeks flushed a deep red, clearly unprepared to receive such a compliment. Namjoon’s words effectively killed all the giggling from the other members, instead putting the whole room into a silence. Jungkook ducked his head downward, his eyes glued to the floor. “Thanks, hyung.” He mumbled.

“You’re welcome.” He replied with a nod of his head, almost like he was trying to emphasize how the other members should have reacted in this situation. Yoongi wanted to thank the man for his words as well, happy that he brought attention to something other than their embarrassment over being exposed. Namjoon sank into his seat and turned back to his phone, his words leaving the room in a very awkward tension. “Now, can you guys run off before the two of you actually manage to summon a hole in the ground big enough to swallow you both?”

“Oh god yes.” Yoongi spat out, immediately turning for the hallway and running away from the embarrassment. He didn’t have to look over his shoulder to know Jungkook was following close behind, his light footsteps falling into rhythm with his own.

Yoongi was rushing straight for his door, mentally preparing himself to bury his body into his bed and sleep the rest of the day away. He had an emergency storage of energy left should Jungkook decide they had to talk about what just happened but he was hoping it wouldn’t come to that. His heart lunged into his throat when he felt Jungkook’s hand grab hold of his and lightly pull it back to grab his attention.

“Hyung...” Jungkook choked, clearing his throat. “Your neck--Why didn’t you tell me I was too--”

Yoongi immediately shook his head, interrupting his thoughts. “I was being stupid about it, it’s fine. I didn’t even realize there were marks until Jin-hyung pointed it out.” Jungkook brushed his thumb along Yoongi’s hand subconsciously, his eyes staring at the red tinted prints on his throat. His brows were knit together in concern and it made something twist tightly in Yoongi’s gut. The feeling scared him every time it made an appearance, but Yoongi forced himself to ignore it. He had all the time in the world to figure it out but right now couldn’t be wasted on it. He took in a deep breath and subconsciously rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous fidget. “I guess that just means we have to practice more, right?” He chuckled.

Jungkook’s gaze jumped from his neck up to lock with Yoongi’s. He still looked so concerned, but Yoongi could see layers of emotions glinting in his large doe eyes. Some of it he could recognize but most of it was a complete mystery to him. The one thing Yoongi was certain about was that there wasn’t a drop of malice in them. It baffled him how any of the other members could ever think Jungkook would have a violent bone in his body when he reacted like this over the smallest thing.

“Actually…” Jungkook mumbled, the words sitting on the edge of his lips. He looked nervous and that in turn made Yoongi nervous. It made him think that Jungkook was going to call this off now. Yoongi watched him try and find the right words, completely prepared for the man to decide the guilt was too much to deal with and cancel their deal. He would understand that, but it would be one of the biggest let downs for him to date. He liked spending the extra alone time with Jungkook and getting to know him on a more intimate level. He had been thriving off of all the extra physical contact the younger supplied him with and the thought of losing it made his stomach drop. Jungkook licked his lips and closed his eyes as he took in a short breath. “I was hoping we could just…do the hand holding part…?” He asked with a low voice.

“Huh?” Yoongi hummed in reaction to his request. He thought about pointing out that Jungkook was already currently holding his hand, but that just made it more obvious what he was actually asking of him. “Right now?”

Jungkook nodded, teeth catching his lower lip in a nervous bite. He pulled his eyes open and slowly peaked at Yoongi’s face, worried he would be denied. Yoongi couldn’t help but to smile, that feeling he had been pointedly ignoring erupting in his stomach. It was such an intense emotion that flew through him that his ears started ringing. Yoongi reached a hand for his doorknob, not even bothering to look away from Jungkook as he twisted it open.

Jungkook’s lips spread into his signature bunny-toothed smile, following in after Yoongi encouraged it with a light tug on his hand. Yoongi unsuccessfully tried to force his own smile down as he walked them towards his bed. “We can take a break on the choking, but I hope you know I’m still expecting more of those forehead kisses.”

Jungkook giggled in response, beaming at how red Yoongi’s face became after delivering such a line. He tried to play it off like he was teasing him, but Jungkook took it completely seriously. He yanked on Yoongi’s arm, intentionally pulling the man closer to him. Yoongi stumbled a bit from the sudden jerk on his body, but he regained his footing quickly. Jungkook took the extra step forward and with his free hand he brought his pinky towards Yoongi’s bangs and brushed them out of the way. He very quickly but very softly pecked the lightest of kisses to his skin, his sudden bout of courage drained from his body once he pulled away.

Yoongi didn’t expect that from him, but it wasn’t anything he would ever complain about. He huffed out the softest laugh, not letting Jungkook step away from him. Yoongi reached his free hand towards Jungkook’s and laced their fingers together, raising them both upwards and leveled with their shoulders. His eyes stared at the way they fit together, admiring how soft and clean cut Jungkook’s nails were and laughing over how bitten and chewed up his were in comparison. Something about it both looked and felt right to him and he was sure it had to do with the emotion the younger had been bringing to him lately. He wouldn’t think about it right now, but he knew when he did it he could be as scared as he wanted to be and know Jungkook would be there for him through it.

That thought alone brought out the biggest smile on his face and it was amazing to see how contagious it was as Jungkook mimicked it. “Man,” Yoongi huffed, his thumb brushing gently along Jungkook’s. “Getting what I want feels amazing.”