Chapter Text
Katsuki doesn’t remember becoming friends with Ochako.
He’d been a kid when Deku introduced them both to each other. He hadn’t liked her because she was a frigging girl. She cried too much and squealed too much. She sucked at climbing trees and fighting. She'd been an annoying pain in the ass.
He remembered the annoyance at having a girl follow him around and the irritation creeping on him when she doesn’t fall behind. Remembered how she and Deku smiled despite bleeding on one hand and a knee when one of them tripped to the ground when they’d been exploring the hills. It irritated him when they looked like absolute idiots that follow him around just to get hurt.
There'd been a time when both Deku and Ochako cried out of fright when the three of them had accidentally disturbed a beehive and the bees vengefully followed them around. They hadn't been stung but the damn losers got so scared they'd bawled their eyes out.
Almost every single thing they did had more or less irritated and annoyed Katsuki.
Strangely enough, he'd never really thought of abandoning the two idiots. Not even when they did a stupid thing that embarrassed him in front of their damn folks. Like closing in on his damn space and hug him out of nowhere, not even making a way for him to hide his embarrassment while being forced on hearing the adults coo on them like they were still in their shit-stained diapers.
The next thing he knew, he was already tolerating their presence and had fun playing around when exploring places and even when they didn’t.
He remembered getting so angry at a playmate from a park when he’d witnessed Ochako being pushed to the ground, trying and failing to hold back tears. At that moment, he didn’t know which angered him more, the obnoxious bastard he beat up or the girl who cried on the floor because goddammit, his people shouldn’t be someone who cries so easily. If they were gonna follow him around, they’d have to be as awesome and badass as him too. It doesn’t have anything to do with his mom constantly telling - yelling - and reminding him when she’d discovered he sort-of had a girl for a friend, that he had to be nice and treat her delicately, whatever that meant. It has everything to do with the fact that - that fucking nobody dared mess with one of his own.
The sight of her face filled with awe and gratefulness had him frowning and chopping her head enough to make her wince before he left her alone only for her to go after him again. She’d grabbed and tugged on his shirt and beamed a thank you to his face. Seeing the face she made, he’d thought that the yelling he’d get from his mom when she inevitably found out he beat up somebody would be worth it.
He remembered telling her that she better not be the one crying the next time somebody picks on her.
Although he hadn’t really realized it at that time, he’d already considered the two idiots following his tail his ‘followers’, or maybe he himself was a damned idiot cause he knew he cared a lot more than that. He felt the need to try and help them with some things and felt like he had to toughen them up. Cuz they’re such weaklings, he needed to rescue them all the damn time.
She still cried when she gets hurt and as annoying as Deku fusses over her, he finds himself wondering why he was still hanging out with a crybaby and a dumbass loser. It never goes beyond wondering as he’d left everything as is.
Katsuki knew even as a kid that he was smart and strong, everybody said so, he believed it and it was true. He hadn't really understood how his kinda-friends could be such dumbasses sometimes.
There had been plenty of times when he’d felt annoyed and furious because of his two ‘followers’. Granted, he’d always felt irritation creeping on him whenever he was with the weaklings, even more so when they attempt to help him. It’s like they’d thought he was too weak to stand up on his own feet, like he needed the fuckin’ help, like they could do something about it. He didn’t really know when it started. When he’d felt like they were mocking him and then he'd end up more-often-than-not snapping when he was with them. They were the ones who always needed help. Not him. They were the ones who needed the protection. Not him.
It got to a point where he almost hurt Ochako.
He would’ve hurt her.
He hadn’t meant to.
If wasn't for Deku who quickly grabbed and tightly held Ochako’s hand, she would have fallen down the stairs.
It hadn't escaped him how long the fall would've been if she really fell.
For the life of him, he couldn’t even remember the reason why he pushed her with that much force. All he could remember was the pent up anger boiling till he exploded with rage, then the loud pounding of his heart when he saw the direction of where she’d fall. He remembered the panic and didn’t even notice the instantaneous dissipation of his anger and the lift of his hand to try and get a hold of her. He’d heard his mother’s voice in his head, saying he should be gentle, be kind and do what he can to protect his friends.
No.
He wasn’t supposed to be the one hurting her.
Katsuki wasn’t ashamed to admit that he’d been scared. At least to himself. Because for fucks’ sake, Ochako would been hurt bad.
Again, because of him.
Deku had been shaking and then cried, held Ochako and hugged her tight.
‘Why’d you do that?’ Deku had looked him in the eye, tears still pouring from the corner of his eyes.
‘Why’d you do that Kacchan?’ Deku repeated when he’d said nothing.
Ochako had been close to tears, face terrified when she’d looked at him and then smiled. She fuckin’ smiled, even when she’d been as white as paper and her tears had threatened to fall.
“I’m okay!” she’d exclaimed, beamed brightly, as though everything was alright, as though he hadn’t almost pushed her down the fucking stairs.
She’d patted Deku and repeatedly told him she was okay.
Katsuki remembered trembling when she got up, walked to him and then held his hand, her smile wide even when she was still obviously scared. She’d looked at him and told him, “I’m okay.”, as though she was trying to convince him that it was true.
Katsuki had never remembered a time in his short life when he’d been close to tears. Sure, he’d cried when he was scolded and got bonked in the head by his mom, but he didn’t cry when he got into fights. He hadn’t cried when he scraped a knee or when he fell down the river.
But at that moment, his eyes stung.
There had been a burst of feeling in his chest. Most of all, it relieved and comforted him that nothing had happened.
Even after all that, he couldn’t bring himself to apologize. He just held Ochako’s hand tight and shook.
After that incident, he’d been reluctant to even go anywhere near the two people who followed him around. He’d been afraid he’d do something. Again. But everything was as it always had been. Deku and Ochako still followed him, even when he tried harder to push them away. They still offered him some of their lunch, still picked his side when some of their playmates picked a fight with him and still accompanied him when he didn’t have anyone to play with.
Not that he was looking for someone to play with.
He’d hated the ugly feeling that rose within him when he’d almost caused someone, her - harm. It wasn’t like when he’d gotten into fights with his other playmates or the older kids from school. He’d felt triumphant and glee when he won his fights and hit some nobodies he didn't like. It wasn't the same feeling when he'd done, almost done it to Ochako.
He hadn’t understood why they’d still want to come close to him when he did something like what he had.
Sometimes, he’d think about what was so different about both Deku and Ochako and his other ‘followers’, just to find himself thinking that they just were.
Being the shitty, idiotic kid that Katsuki was, he'd let the fear fade into the back of his mind and allowed the two morons trail after him.
All the kids Katsuki knew were fans of All Might, the number one hero.
He certainly was.
It's on an evening of December when his mom decided to have a 'fan-fucking-tastic' Christmas party, where the two losers who were always on his tail and he were gathered in front of the television, that he renewed his determination to become the goddamn best hero as soon as he could.
The three of them had seen All Might save a hundred people and beat the villain black and blue before Katsuki loudly proclaimed he'd be the number one hero in the future. Ochako had exclaimed that she'd be one of the best while Deku excitedly threw his fist into the air and shouted about how he'd be just like All Might when he grew up.
From that point on, the three of them had sworn to each other that they'd be the best hero in the entire planet.
When his quirk showed up, he's beyond ecstatic about it and disappointed that Ochako and Deku still didn't have one. Frankly, Katsuki had been too busy flaunting his awesome quirk to the other extras to really pay attention to the dumb idiots that looked at him excitedly and with envy.
His teachers and classmates praised him even more than before. Even Ochako and Deku had told him his quirk was really cool. Katsuki then thought that his quirk would naturally be as cool as he was.
It wasn't until two months later that he found the hard way what Ochako's quirk was. He couldn't even boast about having the better quirk or get irritated if it turned out she had the better one. He didn't even really know which was which when he just suddenly floated up and dangled over the slides at the park, still steadily going higher and higher into the sky.
He hadn't known why he remembered then, the balloon Deku had begged his mother to buy, only for him to accidentally let go of the string and helplessly watch and see it float up and up until they couldn't. Katsuki still remembered Deku's cries, repeatedly saying sorry as he clung to his mother's skirt.
Katsuki had felt like he was gonna be the balloon that disappeared into space.
He'd remembered being terrified as both Deku and Ochako screamed his name and shouted for help. He could make out the tears falling down their cheeks and faintly saw as Ochako became paler while he'd filled up with dread.
After being rescued out of the sky in what felt like the most agonizing days in his entire short life, he just remembered being blanked out as he got chastised by his mom when all he could do above ground was shout curses and yell a lot of 'Get-me-the-fuck-down's.
A bunch of things happened fast after his feet touched the ground and he'd finally discovered it was Ochako's quirk that almost sent him into the stratosphere. Only then did he notice that it was only his mother and Deku that fussed over if he was alright. Ochako, that crybaby had fainted with exhaustion and overused her quirk.
Katsuki’s mother had made sure that he'd be getting home with the help of Deku's mom before she accompanied Ochako to the ambulance and to the hospital.
He hadn't known what he felt then.
Gone was the terrifying feeling in his chest. He only knew that Ochako had better damn apologize for nearly killing him and that she'd better not cry about it later.
Later:
She cried.
She fuckin’ cried and said she was sorry.
Katsuki really hadn't understood why she’d thought it was her fault.
As far as he knew, kids their age would develop their quirks and cause massive amounts of accidents and property damage in their vicinity. Aside from scaring the shit out of him, she hadn't really done anything that damaging.
So he'd told her to shut up and that he forgave her so she'd better not do it again.
Cuz he'd seriously go after her if she intentionally tossed him sky high.
It hadn't even passed a day when the three of them met after he floated when he'd noticed the girl avoiding him, Deku and everyone in general like they had a fuckin disease. It pissed him so much that he ended up yelling a little too loudly that Ochako flinched whenever he'd said something.
While he'd been sort-of afraid (just a tiny, tiny bit) of getting close to Ochako after almost having an anxiety attack and almost busting his throat, shouting profanities up and up into the air, he'd remembered the tears and snot on her face, looking so damn pitiful that he'd do things he really, really disliked.
He'd held her hand tight and while he risked having a heart attack every time he feels his feet off the ground, he'd thought that it was fine since Ochako knew how to undo her quirk.
It was a fucking disgrace.
He'd gotten goosebumps cuz he knew himself it just wasn't him in any sense of the word.
But he'd found he hadn't really cared that much anyways.