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“Dean, do you mind getting the door?” Castiel called out from his office.
Rolling his eyes, Dean got up anyway. With only a little bit of difficulty, he pushed himself up, keeping a hand on his large belly. The touch never failed to bring a smile to his face, and even now, Dean knew his lips were stretched out as he unlocked the door, not checking who it was as he pulled it open.
Later, he’d smack himself for his stupidity, and even Cas would warn him about all the dangers until Dean inevitably fell asleep. But for now, Dean was too distracted to be able to think of anything going wrong, still comfortably lounging on his cloud nine after the past few month’s events. Which is why he crashed particularly hard when he saw who was at the door.
The man had his back to Dean, looking at the rest of the neighborhood. But at the sound of the door opening, he turned around. “Hi, is Mr. Nov–” halting in his tracks, the man gaped.
Dean wasn’t any better, his grip tightening on the doorknob.
“S–Sam?” He whispered. Sam blinked, shock clearly written all over his features.
“Dean?” Dean inhaled sharply, his body automatically turning to Cas before he was even aware of his actions. But he didn’t stop himself from willingly folding into Cas’s side, his husband looping an arm around his waist, pulling him closer with a concerned frown wrinkling his face.
“Is everything alright here?” Cas asked, looking back and forth between Sam and Dean.
Swallowing, Dean found himself unable to answer. So he wordlessly stared at his brother, until he spoke first. “M–Mr. Novak, I…” And then Sam trailed off.
Cas raised his eyebrows, before they furrowed in thought again. “…You’re my one o’clock meeting, aren’t you?”
Smiling thinly, that prompted Sam to take a step forward, holding out a hand to Cas. “Yeah… Sam Winchester. You’d requested a meeting with a representative at my department?”
Cas’s eyes widened in comprehension, and he looked between Sam and Dean again.
“Oh… Right. Of course. Come on in, I suppose.” His grip on Dean didn’t loosen though, and for that, Dean was grateful. He knew it came across to his husband the moment he tucked himself further into Cas’s side, staying well enough away from Sam’s path as he made his way inside, hesitant. “Please, Mr. Winchester. My office is just this way,” Cas gestured down the hall, not making a move himself. Sam glanced between the hall and Cas, uncertainty clear on his features. “I’ll join you in just a bit.” Cas added, and Sam’s face cleared somewhat.
He nodded, chancing another look at Dean, who was still frozen and unable to move except for when his husband guided him into the kitchen, prompting both the brothers to move towards their respective destination.
As soon as Sam was out of their eyesight, disappearing into Cas’s office followed by the soft shnick of the door closing behind him, Cas crowded Dean into the kitchen island. He easily tilted his head to the side as he leaned forward and desperate for the comfort, Dean went in, tucking his nose into the crook of his husband’s neck as he brought his arms under Cas’s arms and around his torso. Cas held him as close as he could, in return, even with the baby bump between them.
“It’s okay,” Cas whispered. “You’re alright, sweetheart. I’m right here and not going anywhere, remember?”
His words were enough to tilt Dean over the edge, and he shuddered, his inhale loud and wet as Dean tried to surround himself in his husband as much as he could. His fingers were clawing the back of Cas’s shirt, and he pressed his forehead to Cas’s cheek, taking deep breaths at his husband’s steady prompts.
“You’re alright,” Cas continued muttering, low and soothing, everything Dean needed. “I’m not letting you go anywhere you don’t want to, I promise you.”
Nodding shakily, Dean lifted his head enough to press a kiss to Cas’s cheek, but otherwise didn’t move apart from keeping his lips flat on Cas’s stubble. He didn’t bother opening his eyes when Cas slowly unwrapped his arms from around Dean, bringing his own hands to gently cup Dean’s face. Gently repositioning Dean’s head, Cas pulled him away far enough to press a kiss to Dean’s lips, licking in lightly and flooding Dean’s mouth with his taste before pulling back.
“Do you want to go to bed? I’ll come get you after he leaves — you don’t even have to see or hear him until he’s gone.”
Dean pressed his forehead to Cas’s. “No, I… no.” Dean breathed, in and out, before he went on, Cas waiting patiently the entire time. “I’ll just stay here and… you guys can finish whatever you have to do and-and we can go from there?” His eyes drifted open, ever so slightly, though he kept his gaze low until Cas bent down, purposefully trying to meet Dean’s gaze. When Dean acquiesced, Cas smiled softly.
“Of course, Dean.” He pressed another chaste kiss to Dean’s lips, lingering before pulling away. Nodding to himself, Dean let himself be guided by the gentle hand at the base of his spine, massaging him comfortingly until Cas helped Dean resituate back on the couch. “Yell if you need anything, alright?” Cas said. When Dean nodded, Cas bent down to press a kiss to his forehead. Straightening, he stroked Dean’s cheek before finally retreating to his office.
Breathing deeply, Dean settled down, bringing his hands to cradle his belly. “Guess it’s just you and me now, kid.”
The kick that met his palm was enough to momentarily comfort him. Even that, however, didn’t last long, so Dean was thankful when the kid within him, somehow seemingly sensing Dean’s distress, started a steady movement consisting of rolls, kicks, and punches to meet Dean’s ready hands. Any other time, Dean would have easily gotten tired of getting his organs repeatedly pummeled at. Now, he took the distraction for what it was, his smile admittedly turning pained at times but never completely diminishing as he stared down at his bulging belly.
Too soon, yet simultaneously what felt like an eternity later, Dean heard Cas’s office door opening. He instinctively tended, his hands stiff against his belly. His actions must have obviously not gone unnoticed by the baby, because barely a second later, Dean got to experience how it felt to be housing a washing machine powered onto high in his abdomen.
It didn’t stop him from hearing the soft pattern of footsteps coming closer, the sound barely muted on their soft carpet.
As Sam came around the sofa and into Dean’s line of sight, he awkwardly cleared his throat. Cas was nowhere to be seen. “So… how many months?” He asked. His stance was forcefully casual, Dean could tell, as Sam tucked his hands into his pockets, slightly hunching in on himself. The sight was startling, throwing Dean back to when Sam had just started hitting his growth spurt, hunching into himself to avoid losing control of his then gangly limbs and falling into another clumsily born mishap. The man in front of him now — Dean knew, that this man hadn’t had to bother making himself seem smaller or less intimidating in a while. The glimpse Dean got when he opened the door to come face to face with Sam was enough to sear itself into his memory, the vision of his brother standing straight-backed and confident, embracing his tall and bulky stature, clear in Dean’s mind.
“Six months,” Dean replied. He only just managed to make himself sound as carefree as Sam, although he still couldn’t bring himself to meet his brother’s eyes. “Where’s Cas?” He asked quickly.
“Uh,” Sam tilted towards the office, gesturing to the closed door with a tilt of his head. “He… he said he was gonna do something and… let us talk for a bit. If you-if you’re okay with that, I guess.”
Screw every good thought Dean had about his husband. Dean going to kill him instead. With his bare hands.
Aloud, Dean cleared his throat. “Right. Okay then,” biting his lip, Dean gestured to the armchair perpendicular to him. “Uh, sit down, if you want.”
Thankfully, Sam immediately took the chair, Dean watching with a sort of detached amazement as his brother folded his limbs gracefully until he was tucked away into a seated position.
“So…” Sam started, after a long moment’s pause and when it became clear that Dean wasn’t going to start first. “How’ve you been Dean?”
The question was so stupid, Dean was staring at Sam with raised eyebrows, looking completely unimpressed before he realized what he was doing. For his part, Sam did seem to regret his word choice, and immediately opened his mouth again. “Right, nevermind. So… you and Castiel?” He tried again, wary this time. Dean didn’t blame him. “How’d you guys meet?”
Ah. “I… I was hanging around town when I bumped into Cas. Dude was holding a sheaf of papers, and you know,” Dean waved his hands vaguely to mimic the vision of papers flying everywhere. “I was helping him grab them before he just shook his head, and the next thing I know, he was ditching his papers on the road and asking me if I wanted to go grab a beer instead.”
Sam raised his eyebrows. “Wow. That—huh.”
Dean chuckled. He slowly felt himself starting to lose the tension in his muscles as he continued to lose himself in the memory of meeting Cas for the first time. “Yeah. When I found out he was a lawyer over a couple drinks, I had pretty much the same reaction you did. But he just shrugged me off, saying leaving those papers behind to be run over by cars was more therapeutic than yoga.” Dean laughed again, absently stroking his belly. “So… yeah. I ended up staying longer than I’d planned to… ended up not even blowing out of town like I thought I would, and somehow, Cas’s managed to keep me here since.” He grinned wryly, looking down at his belly.
When he looked up, he caught Sam staring down at his belly as well. His eyes had softened, something almost inscrutable in them. If Dean were to hazard a guess, he dared to think that it was fondness swimming in the depths of his brother’s gaze. And that helped Dean to relax completely against the sofa, feeling the last of his tension ebb away with his brother still sitting there.
Which is of course when Sam just had to make Dean regret getting comfortable too soon.
“Dean, I have to — how’s dad?”
He inhaled sharply. Stiff as a board, Dean’s vision of Sam looking genuinely curious but also regretful of the question disappeared behind a haze of white. And suddenly, like the angel Cas was, he appeared out of the blue beside Dean, immediately sitting beside him and grabbing his hand, looking for all the world as if it was just another casual gesture of PDA with his husband. But Dean knew that his husband was offering comfort in every way he could without making it too obvious, and for that he was reminded her again of just how much Dean loved him. It was only with the secure knowledge of that being a literal warmth at his side that prompted him to push the words out through his teeth.
“Don’t know. Probably drunk in a ditch somewhere, for all we care.” He gritted out. Cas’s hands tightened, yet he remained silent.
Sam frowned. “Did you — when was the last time you saw him?”
Later, Dean would apologize for the nail marks he was no doubt leaving on the back of Cas’s hands. “Three months ago.” Which wasn’t long enough in both Cas and Dean’s minds, he knew. But to Sam, who was so far out of their circle and most likely still stuck thinking everything was as it used to be years and years ago, Dean knew that for his brother, it was too long a time gap, even for their drunk, neglectful father.
“And you haven’t reached out to him? Jesus, Dean, he could be lying out there somewhere dead in that ditch!” Sam exclaimed, abruptly rising.
As fast as he could, aided with Cas’s help, Dean got to his feet as well. “Well, then, good riddance!” He snapped. Sam reared back, shock clear on his features at Dean’s harsh words.
“Wh-Dean?”
“I don’t care if he’s lying dead, Sam.” Despite the tears that prickled at the back of his eyes, Dean held onto Cas’s hand firmly. He leaned to his side, Cas sturdily taking his weight. Cas wrapped an arm around Dean’s waist. “God knows the bastard would deserve it after everything he’s done to us, done to my unborn child!” Dean’s voice increased in volume until he was essentially yelling. The words had just finished passing his lips when he suddenly hissed in pain, the baby landing a particularly sharp kick to his gut, unappreciative of his fluctuation in blood pressure.
He could feel without having to see Cas clenching his jaw, but he stubbornly stayed silent as he slowly eased — more like forcing — Dean back onto the sofa. Sam was already taking a fearful step forward, a hand outstretched as if he was going to grab onto Dean, holding himself back at the last second.
“Jesus, Dean — is he okay?” He asked Cas.
“I’m right here, asshole.” Dean muttered, trying to rub a soothing hand over his belly, hoping to get the kid with his program and chill out before Dean’s bladder was used for target practice next. Seriously, he wasn’t keen on using the bathroom every half hour, but even then, there was still at most another ten minutes to go for sure before the next half hour mark. “And yes, I’m fine. Sit down, Cas, jeez.”
The unimpressed, flat look that Cas threw him before his features smoothed out as he sat back down promised Dean he was going to regret chewing his husband out later tonight, but that was so not something else Dean needed right now, thank you and goodbye libido.
Shuffling in his seat, he pinned Sam with an unrelenting stare until he retreated, slowly folding himself back into the armchair like an origami. Soon as he finished though, he immediately opened his mouth again. “What the hell happened, Dean?”
Dean sighed heavily. There wasn’t any way for him to try delaying the inevitable any longer.
“After you left, things were… stressed between us, to say the least.” Dean looked down to his belly, keeping his gaze there as he recounted the events he would have much rather never had to have visited again. He did his best to skip over the gory details, going right to the part of the story that actually mattered to sum up the past in the least painful way possible for himself. “Long story short, dad found me with a guy and.” Dean swallowed. “Well. He flipped. It was hell.” Unbidden, a tear escaped. Shaking his head, Dean blinked rapidly as he looked off to the side. “Soon as I could drive, I was tearing out of there. Didn’t even think of waiting for dad to come back — if he was going to come back, I don’t know. Didn’t care to find out. Soon after, bumped into this guy.” A small smile tugged at his lips as he tilted his head to Cas, his ear brushing Cas’s shoulder. At the touch, Dean found his head feeling heavy, and let his head drop and rest on Cas’s shoulder. “For a year, everything was fine. And then, three months in dad decided to stop by. I have no idea how the hell he found us, it’s not like I go around advertising my location, but he did. And… he knew I was pregnant, soon as he laid eyes on me, and—” nauseated, Dean was forced to stop. Cas, the best human being in existence, in Dean’s opinion, picked up the story, keeping it as short and simple as Dean did.
“Dean was in the hospital for a good two weeks before they allowed him to be discharged.” Cas stated. “Your father left town before we could even proceed with pressing our charges.”
Sam paled. “Christ, what did he do—”
Dean was already shaking his head. “Don’t want to talk about it, and if you’re any good at respecting my wishes, you’re just gonna leave it right there too.” He said gruffly.
Sam looked like he was going to try arguing further on the subject, but after a few seconds, he wisely kept his mouth shut, nodding in acceptance instead.
“Shit. Okay, fine. Just…” at Dean’s sharp glare, he faltered, before pressing on anyway. “Do-do you guys know if it’s gonna be a girl or a boy?”
Disbelief rendered Dean unable to respond at first. And then, despite himself, he felt a slow smile bloom on his face. And soon he was chuckling, feeling at ease. Hell, for the first time in a long while, Dean suddenly realized that the heaviness in his chest he’d long gotten accustomed to… was starting to fade away.
“We don’t know,” he admitted. “We wanted to keep it as a surprise.” He eyed his brother sharply, noting every minute change in his brother’s facial features as he continued talking. “Guess you’re just gonna have to stick around to find out, Sammy.”
As a shocked grin practically split his brother’s face in half, Cas soft, approving grin visible from Dean’s peripherals, Dean felt like he could float with giddiness at how perfect everything was at that moment.