Chapter Text
When Chiron suggested it, Will wasn’t sure what to think, but Nico was.
“Absolutely not!” Nico yelled, drawing eyes from the surrounding tables.
“Chiron,” Will asked, “Why do you want us to do this? I thought you were against us dating.”
“I’m against you using your doctors notes to get your boyfriend out of things,” Chiron explained, “But you and Nico are currently the most popular couple in camp and, well, with all of the new cabins being built, we need some extra income. I figured people would pay to ask you two questions.”
“So people invade our privacy and you get paid?” Nico said. He looked at Will. “Do you hear this guy?”
Will looked between Chiron and his boyfriend for a moment. “I might have a compromise.”
And so Nico and Will agreed, because;
Firstly, they were tired of having to search Nico's cabin every time they made out, and maybe doing this would decrease the amount of snoopers.
And secondly, Chiron was paying them each in pie. A lot of pie. Enough pie to satisfy even someone with a Dean Winchester like love of pie.
Jason walked in first.
“Typical.” Nico grumbled so only Will could hear, “Of course Jason is the first”
Jason put the money in their jar and sat at the opposite side of the table.
"So... I have fifteen minutes of questions, and I fully plan to make them count. Okay, so first, what is the most embarrassing thing Nico has ever done to you, Will?"
Will looked up. "I don’t think Nico’s ever embarrassed me.”
“What about something embarrassing he’s done to himself?”
“I'd have to say it was this time I found him in a medicine cabinet.” Will admitted. “He was trying to shadowtravel to me, but got stuck in there for some reason.”
Jason nodded, "Interesting answer. What about you, Neeks? Wha—"
Nico cut him off, "If you call me that again I will rip out your tongue with my teeth.”
Realizing the implications behind that statement, he blushed and stammered, "I- I didn't mean it that way."
Will spoke up. "I've changed my mind. That was the most embarrassing thing he's ever done."
Jason cleared his throat. "Anyway, Nee- um, Nico, what's the most embarrassing thing Will has ever done to you?"
Nico looked to Will and grinned while Will put his head in his hands.
"Once, Will got drunk and when I picked him up, he asked if I was single. When I said I wasn't, he started crying about how I was so cute and brave.”
Jason looked unimpressed. "That's not as bad as some things Piper, Leo, and I've done. Once, we snuck into a nightclub and stole all the olives, then Piper charmspoke people into wanting martinis and we watched while drunk people cried over not getting olive in their drinks.”
“That’s kinda mean,” Will said.
Jason shrugged. “I need to be more Greek, and you guys are mean.”
“Rude.”
“Anyway, this is the most important question. Nico is like a brother to me,” Jason started.
“I am?” Nico interrupted. “What?”
“And as his self appointed older brother figure, I need to ask- how far have you two gone?”
Nico and Will both just sat there.
“Jason,” Will eventually said, “Nico and I have been together for years. Of course we’ve,” Will paused, “You know.”
Jason nodded. “That’s fair. Just make sure to use protection.”
“Jason, my sex life isn’t any of your business.” Nico said.
“I just care about you,” Jason protested, “You’re like a brother to me.”
Nico sighed. “Fine. As long as you don’t try to give me a sex talk. Between Hazel and Reyna being as overprotective as they are and my boyfriend being a doctor, I’ve got that covered.”
“Hopefully you’ve also got your dick covered. STDs are no joke.”
“Please shut up before I make you.” Nico said. He didn’t need to, because just then the timer went off.
“Thank the gods!” Nico cried out, pressing the button.
Once Jason had left, Nico turned to Will. “That was the longest 15 minutes of my life.”
“Agreed,” Will seconded, “But it’s worth it. You ever had chess pie?”