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Operation: Celebration

Summary:

Shepard and co need to pull off the perfect mission - a birthday party

Written for art created by CalypsoTea

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Shepard leaned back into her couch and looked over the plan one more time. All the basics were covered - the who, what and where. Steve even made sure they had all the proper supplies. Granted, there was a lot of room for error, but it was all they had to go on at this point. All in all, not bad for something thrown together at the last minute. No real surprise, since that’s how they usually operated. Satisfied, she turned back to the group call. “Not bad, eh guys?”

 

“Do you really think this will work?” Scepticism practically dripped from the subharmonics, even over the communication line.

 

“Do I think...” Shepard scoffed into her omnitool, “Who do you think you’re dealing with here, Garrus? Of course it will work.”

 

“So you figured out how to pull off your part without arousing suspicion?” he asked. He never was as impressed with her plans as she was. “Or are you just going to Commander Shepard it into submission?”  

 

That was the first time Shepard ever heard her name used as a verb. It was odd, but not entirely unpleasant. Not that she’d ever admit it to Garrus. Instead, she focused on the question. “I’ll wing it. I’ve gotten pretty good at it over the years.”

 

“Wing it. That’s comforting.” Vega chuckled.

 

“Vague declarations of confidence are not a good sign,” Liara chimed in.

 

Shepard rolled her eyes. “Don’t overthink it. Everything will be fine as long as you guys do your parts.”

 

Garrus laughed in harmonious dual tones. “Our parts, she says. As if most of this wasn’t resting on my shoulders.”

 

“And what sturdy shoulders they are,” Shepard replied automatically. Nothing like a little empty praise to get the ball rolling. She continued the call as she gathered her stuff and walked towards the door to her quarters.

 

“Hey, what about me?” Vega interrupted, “I’m the one doing the heavy lifting.”

 

“That’s because my task actually requires attention to detail.” Garrus shot back.

 

“Now boys, there’s no need to fight. You’re both my hero.” The fish tank illuminated her high cheekbones as she grinned mischievously. “Until I amaze everyone with my skill in setting this up and pulling it all of flawlessly, that is. Then I’ll be the true hero of the day and everything will be right with the universe once more.”

 

The reactions were exactly what she’d expected, the groans and laughs music to her ears. It was nice to share a little downtime and some easy, gentle ribbing between crew while the universe fell apart around their ears. It broke things up a bit.

 

“Alright guys, enough talk. It’s time to put the plan into motion. Everyone ready?” Shepard paused for responses from the group, then nodded. “Great. Let’s do this.”

 

The medbay doors slid open as Shepard approached. She nodded to the doctor as she walked past. There’d be time for niceties later. There was a mission to accomplish.

 

“How are you feeling soldier?” Shepard called out to the krogan on the back cot. It was her standard greeting for Grunt since his arrival back on the ship.

 

“Restless,” Grunt said, rolling his shoulders like he was warming up for action. Or getting stiff from lack of it. He hopped down from the cot, but winced the moment his feet hit the floor. That small action said more than he’d ever admit. He was still recovering from his narrow escape from the reaperized rachni hordes.

 

Shepard raised one eyebrow. There was no sense in pointing out his injuries. That would only encourage him to do something reckless.

 

“What?” Grunt was immediately defensive. He crossed his arms over his chest and glared.

 

“Nothing, nothing,” Shepard said quietly as she waved one hand in the air. “I thought I’d check on you, but if you’d rather be alone…” She turned towards the door, ignoring the fact that Dr. Chakwas sat right next to her. Grunt wasn’t in any danger of being alone if Shepard left.

 

“You can’t just pop your head in like that then turn tail,” Grunt called out before she could take a single step. “You’re up to something. I can smell it.”

 

Shepard smiled. She had him exactly where she wanted him. She bit the inside of her cheek to regain composure, then turned back to the young krogan. “I was just going to see if you were up to another little mission...”

 

“About time!” Grunt shouted over Dr Chakwas’s sounds of displeasure. “What kind of mission are we talking about?”

 

“Top-secret, Spectre level stuff. It was supposed to be a solo thing, but I figured you could use a little excitement after being cooped up here for so long.”

 

“Spectre level, eh? What are we talking?”

 

“Oh, you know. It’s one of those things that always seems to come up yearly. It’s almost like clockwork.” Shepard shrugged.

 

Grunt grinned. “Yeah, it seems like trouble pops up no matter what. Especially when you’re involved.”

 

“This case is a little different, though. It involves some pretty infamous characters. I can’t say much more than that, other than the fact that it’s in a highly restricted area. I’m not allowed to share the location with anyone below my clearance level. Technically, I’m not supposed to even say this much. I sure as hell am not supposed to let anyone see it. Now that I think of it, maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all... ”

 

“You can’t do this to me Shepard!” Grunt cried out. “You brought it up. You can’t leave me hanging like this.”

 

Hook, line, and sinker.

 

“You’d have to do some things you’re not used to…”

 

“Anything to get me out of here,” Grunt interrupted. “I keep telling doc I’m fine, but she ignores me. I swear, her quad is almost as big as yours Shepard.”

 

“Dr Chakwas puts up with Joker on a daily basis and she sat in here with you for a full week so far. She has a much bigger quad than I do.”

 

“And don’t you forget it,” Chakwas called out behind her.

 

Shepard chuckled and nodded. “Alright Grunt, you win. I’ll take you, but only on one condition. I have to keep the location secret. I don’t want you to have to answer any uncomfortable questions if things get wonky. There’s only one solution, but you might not like it. You’ll have to wear this.” Shepard pulled a large, dark cloth out of her back pocket and held it in front of the krogan.

 

“Where am I supposed to put that?” Grunt asked suspiciously.

 

“It’s a blindfold. It covers your eyes, you goof,” Shepard laughed.She gently pushed his hand away and walked around to his back. “And I’ll handle it for you. Don’t want to strain your T-Rex arms.”

 

“Hey, don’t badmouth the T-Rex.” Grunt shifted from one foot to the other. “And my arms are perfect for a krogan. My reach is just fine.”

 

Shepard blushed at the mention of reach. It made her mind wander to other areas with other crewmates, and this was certainly not the time for that. Good thing she was firmly behind Grunt so he couldn’t see her reaction. That was an entirely different discussion for another time. Like never.

 

“How’s that?” Shepard asked once the blindfold was in place.

 

“Dark.”

 

“Then it’s working, isn’t it, smartass.” Shepard patted Grunt’s arm affectionately. “I guess I should lead the way to the shuttle. Unless you want to give it a go. That would be entertaining.”

“Ha ha. Very funny,” Grunt muttered as Shepard lead him by the hand. “Why didn’t you wait to put this thing on me until after we were loaded up and ready?”

 

“Because that didn’t occur to me. Shut up and get in the shuttle.”

 

Shepard reclined the pilot’s chair as far as it would go then put her feet up on the seat next to her. As far as missions went, this one was piece of cake. Hopefully literally, as long as everyone else did their part right.

 

Grunt fidgeted in the back of the shuttle like a kid on the way to the candy shop. “Are we there yet?”

 

“Nope.” Shepard looked out the window. Nothing had changed. They hadn’t moved an inch and Normandy’s cargo deck was just as quiet as it was when they lumbered into the shuttle. Not that Grunt knew any of that. Shepard motioned to the men outside. Steve and James pushed and pulled on the metal frame while Joker’s soothing space travel soundtrack made everything sound as authentic as possible.

 

Grunt sighed. “Can you tell me a little more about the mission, then?”

 

“Yeah, I guess so.” Shepard thought about her answer, then chose her words carefully. “I promise there will be plenty of things to unwrap with this one. We’re expecting heavy fire. That part shouldn’t be too hard to handle. A couple of quick blows will take care of most of it. There’s supposed to be gas-filled explosives lining the perimeter, possibly some sonic attacks. I’ll provide some special headgear to protect against those. Rumor has it there are native fauna that like to get into everything, so you’ll have to be careful and keep an eye out. I’ve also brought specialized weapons. They’re a modified trident, perfect for our needs. Just trust me on that one. It will probably get loud and out of control, but we need to go in quiet. This is a surprise attack, after all. The target won’t know what hit him.”

 

“I like it,” Grunt chuckled. “What do we know about the target?”

 

“He’s some sort of super-soldier or something. Pinnacle of existence, blah blah blah.”

 

“Those are my favorite type to go after.”

 

“Me too.” Shepard smiled. The irony was delicious. Now all they had to do was wait.

 

“Are we there yet?” Grunt whined.

 

“For the tenth time, we’ll get there when we get there,” Shepard snapped from the front of the craft. It rocked side to side, jostling the untethered krogan in the back. She checked her ‘tool and swore under her breath. It felt like they’d been trapped in the stupid metal box for hours, but there was still no word and she wasn’t sure how much more she could take. This was more than she bargained for, that was sure. Much longer and it would be a tough choice between giving up and throwing a boot at Grunt’s head.

 

A green light flashed on Shepard’s tool. About damn time. She signaled to the exhausted men rocking the shuttle. They glared, but simulated landing like pros.

 

“We’re here,” Shepard announced. She made her way to the back, then opened the hatch. “Let me get your headgear in place over the blindfold. That has to stay put until we’re right outside.”

 

Shepard placed a striped, pointed hat on top of Grunt’s head then slipped the elastic band under his chin. “This will keep it in place.” She took a step back to admire her efforts, then snapped a pic for good measure. This one was definitely going in a frame.

 

“It’s not doing anything,” Grunt whispered loudly.

 

Shepard blinked in confusion until she remembered what she told him earlier. “Well, you’re not complaining of a constant high shriek that makes your head feel like it’s going to explode, are you? Then it’s working.” She continued to lead the krogan to the elevator. Somehow, she even managed to keep her composure despite the bright ball on the top of Grunt’s hat bouncing as he shook his head no.

 

The ride was short and sweet. Then the door slid open to silence.

 

“Ready?” She whispered.

 

“No. I don’t have my special weapon,” Grunt replied.

 

Shit. She hadn’t thought about that part. She made sure he didn’t have a gun, but  she should’ve expected him to want a weapon. This was a mission, after all. And the ‘weapon’ she promised wouldn’t work, either. Even a fork was dangerous under the right conditions. And an amped-up Krogan preparing for a fight was definitely the right conditions. The last thing they needed was another crew member sent to the med bay, even if it was just on the other side of the wall.

 

“Tell you what. Let me take that blindfold off first.” Shepard made a silent signal to the room.The lights went dark, then a single spark lit up a row of candles. This was as ready as they’d ever get. She grasped Grunt’s wrist with one hand and used the other to reach for the cloth and tug.

 

“Surprise!” The Normandy crew yelled in unison. Everyone was there, and the room was decorated to perfection. Shepard’s grip was good enough to keep Grunt from destroying half the ship before he realized what was going on. And there was cake. This was one plan that fell perfectly into place.

 

“So I’m the super-soldier, blah blah blah?” Grunt asked once things died down enough to carry a conversation. He took a bite of cake then waved the fork at Shepard. “And I assume this is the special trident?”

 

“What can I say?” Shepard shrugged, then embraced the krogan as best she could. “Only the best for my little tank boy. Happy birthday. Or tank day. Whatever.”