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“What are you up to?” said Valkyrie from the doorway.
Loki was sitting on a couch, looking at star charts and maps that the Statesman’s navigators had copied out for him.
Valkyrie’s hair was loose around her shoulders, and her clothes were rumpled. As usual, she had a flask of alcohol in her hands, but it was nearly full. Despite her insistence that she wasn’t sobering up, she had been drinking less, and she had become more well-mannered as a result.
Still, her relationship with Loki was awkward at best, and they had both silently agreed to keep out of each other’s way. But as large as the ship was, they found themselves coming face-to-face when they least wanted it.
“Why do you always think people are up to something?” Loki asked, now on his guard.
“Because in my experience, they usually are.”
“This isn’t Sakaar,” said Loki. “The people on this ship will not attempt to kill you at a moment’s notice.”
To his surprise, Valkyrie chuckled. “Fair point. Let me ask that more nicely: what are you up to?”
Loki showed her the charts. “We’re very far from any habitable planet.”
“That’s to be expected.” Valkyrie looked at the inky blackness outside. “I’d forgotten how big the universe was when I was on Sakaar. We got hundreds of planets’ refuse and I never contemplated where it came from.”
Loki wondered if she had once been an explorer like him. “Have you ever been to Midgard?”
Valkyrie walked further into the room. “Once, long ago. I presume it’s very different now.”
“It may be difficult for us, but I believe we can live there as if were Asgard.”
“Midgard, Asgard, what’s the difference?” said Valkyrie. “I’ll be a stranger either way.”
Loki was startled by her solemn tone.
“This place – my people – should be my home,” she said. “But it doesn’t feel like home. Not yet, anyway.”
Loki had seen Valkyrie interact with the other Asgardians. She was respected as a hero, but was isolated from them in their day-to-day affairs.
He had gone through something similar. The people of Asgard accepted him now, but being accepted wasn’t the same as belonging. He had always felt like an outsider in his own community, and it had only worsened in recent years.
“The Valkyrie have been turned into a legend.” Valkyrie seemed to be talking to herself now. “I’m not a legend. I’m just a girl who’s been away from home for too long.” She looked down at the flask, as if she’d forgotten she was holding it, and took a gulp.
Loki had never seen her display this kind of vulnerability. Maybe she was drunk after all. He gathered the star charts onto his lap and moved towards one side of the couch.
After a beat, Valkyrie sat down beside him, putting the flask on the floor.
“You don’t have to say all of this to me,” said Loki, now slightly frightened by where Valkyrie was going.
Valkyrie wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “I’ve already tried everyone else. They don’t understand.”
“Did Thor tell you my story?” Loki asked quietly.
“He seems reluctant to.” She looked at him. “Are you a stranger to Asgard, too?”
He nodded.
“Everybody loves telling stories here,” said Valkyrie. “But nobody wants to hear about who I was on Sakaar.”
“Nobody wants to hear about my misdemeanors, either,” said Loki.
Valkyrie was shaking her head. “I joined the Valkyrie so that they couldn’t lock me in a box and tell me what I was meant to be. So I let them lock me into a different box. Everybody thinks the Valkyrie can do no wrong.”
“That’s still no comparison to a traitor,” said Loki dolefully.
“I’m a traitor, too,” said Valkyrie.
Loki hadn’t expected to receive empathy from Valkyrie, of all people. Their relationship had come off to an awful start. But she appeared to have forgiven him. And he realized that he had forgiven her, too.
“I believe you can attain some sense of belonging,” said Loki. “Perhaps not a complete sense.” As he said it, he realized that was his wish for himself, too.
Valkyrie leaned with her elbows on her knees, her face in her hands. “And you are the one who’s going to give me that?”
Loki snorted derisive. That was preposterous. How could two broken people even give each other the feeling that they belonged? How could he - God of Lies - give anyone that? Lest alone a Valkyrie .
Clearly Valkyrie thought otherwise. She inched closer to him - careful that he wouldn’t be aware of it but he was. She had already picked up the bottle again and took another gulp before she offered it to him.
Loki shook his head, declining the offer. He’d rather keep his wits about him. She shrugged in response.
“Maybe we’re not supposed to belong,” Loki mused. “Maybe we’re supposed to wander forever, going from place to place, not having a sense of home.” He turned to look at her. “Maybe that is, in itself, home.”
Valkyrie leaned a little towards him, their faces mere inches apart and Loki felt his breath hitch in the back of his throat. What was she planning? He didn’t trust her and the God braced himself for a sneering comment.
Yet, none of that happened and suddenly her lips crashed on his. With her tongue Valkyrie demanded Loki to open his lips to deepened this kiss and he complied, more eager than he wanted to. She tasted of the alcohol she had been drinking. A tang of sweet cherries mixed honey still lingering in her mouth.
When was the last time he had kissed someone? On Sakaar, yes, the feel of the Grandmasters mouth still very fresh in his memory. But that had been different - born out of… necessity, not what he was happening now.
Loki hummed softly in the back of his throat as their tongues danced. This was nice but not what he had expected. Carefully he broke their kiss.
“You’re drunk,” he said softly and looked down at his hands, a little color creeping up on his cheeks.
“Maybe a little bit,” she shrugged, picking up the bottle to take another swig. “I don’t regret this.”
Loki was silent for a brief moment before he spoke. “Yeah, that’s probably the worst part.”
“Why?” Valkyrie was a little irked now. It hadn’t been that bad and not the worst thing either, had it? Why was he suddenly responding so sullen?
Loki fidgeted with his hands; the nail of his index-finger running over the pad of his thumb. How could he possibly explain her that if she continued on this course - flirting with him or whatever it was - nothing but regret would follow for her? He wasn’t one to be loved, couldn’t be loved. He only left pain and destruction in his wake. He wasn’t worthy of love, of any attention at all. Previous lovers and countless others had-
“You know, it doesn’t have to mean anything,” she interjected his thoughts.
Loki looked up at her. She was studying his face with narrowed eyes and in that moment he became aware of the fact that his emotions were written plainly on his face. Quickly he changed his expression to a neutral one.
“What do you propose?” he asked, now on his guard.
“Let’s fetch another of these bottles-” Valkyrie shaked the empty one she was now holding, “-and see where things go from there.”
The smile she gave him was pleasant, warm, inviting .
Loki weighed his options. He inched a little closer to her and softly placed his lips on hers.
“I think-” he began, his voice hoarse by the tingle he felt on his lips. He composed himself. “I think I can do that.”
Maybe home wasn’t a place. Maybe it was a person.
The End