Chapter Text
It’s automatic-flashes of slightly clammy hands, grimy and twice the size of mine, entwined with my own. The ghosting of your thumb brushing over the back of my hand is ingrained into my senses, and one glance is all it takes for the sensations to come rushing back. The feel of the cloth of your casual tee on my cheek, my back nestled against your chest, my face pressed into the crook of your neck, and that familiar laundry detergent scent I couldn’t get enough of. Tiny tremors I felt through your armor where the thumping of your heart was strong enough to bypass the boundaries of cloth and metal.
I don’t see you much anymore, perhaps only on the battlefield. Our faces once dusted in flour, fights dissolved into cuddles, and the comforts of human warmth - all of our cherished memories- are now tarnished in blood, bound by dutiful oaths, and most of all, held in secondary lovers we seek salvation in.
Then I realize, predictably a beat too early, that is all there is to it. You are nothing more than a memory now.