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John could only laugh at the absurdity of the situation, standing in front of his bathroom mirror, fixing his suit jacket. He was nervous, yes, but mostly excited after the enigmatic phone call he had gotten from his closest friend.
“Hello?” John answered, already twirling the curly string of the house phone around his fingers nervously.
“John, my lovely, I’d like to take you out tonight. Will you come with me, my dear?” John hummed, fakely thinking to make anticipation.
“... Hmm… Of course, Fred. Where, when?” There was a creak and a click from the other end of the line, and some shuffling of papers.
“Tonight. I’ll stop by, we can walk together. Is that alright darling?”
“Yes. What should I wear?”
“Your best suit, love.”
And so here John was, clad in a white button up with a grey suit jacket. The shirt was unbuttoned down to the third, and John found that it looked nicer that way. He carefully fixed his hair, knowing it was much different than the last time Freddie had seen him, where it was down to his chest. Now, a short no-nonsense cut, he could just barely brush through it.
His phone call with Freddie was nearly four hours ago now, and the sun was a half hour away from setting. John got into his shoes, and waited for another seven minutes before there was a firm three knocks at the door. He anxiously fixed his hair, and suddenly wished to have the long, soft locks back to hide behind once again. He opened the door, putting on his best smile.
“Good evening, Freddie.” John greeted, and Freddie grinned. He looked amazing, dressed in a black, white, and red hawaiian shirt and some black dress pants. He thrust a bouquet of blaringly bright yellow daffodils into John's hands.
“Good evening. Dear, do get these some water before we leave, I saw them on my way here and was thinking of you… so…” Freddie laughs, sheepishly now. John blushes, going to get a vase.
“Thinking of me, hm? I’d hope so, I’d rather you not accidentally stand me up.” John sets the vased flowers on the table once he’s watered them, and makes his way back to the front door.
“Ah- yes, I suppose you’re right. Oh- your hair is lovely, by the way.” Freddie laughed again, and held out his arm, “Are you ready?” John stepped out, closing the door behind him before looping his arm around Freddie’s while only smiling at the compliment.
“Of course. Where are we going?” John asked, staring at the sidewalk.
“I figured we could just take a nice walk, go to the beach, maybe?” John furrowed his brows, and looked at Freddie.
“Fred, it’s supposed to rain tonight. We’ll get sick.” Freddie only scoffed,
“Then I suppose we’ll have to beat the clouds! Let’s go!” He slipped his arm from John’s, and started running forward towards the nearest cross section.
“Freddie!” John ran to catch up with him, laughter bubbling up in his chest as he did so. They made it to the end of the road, and found a “Queens Taxi Service” labelled taxi. Freddie waved them down, and opened the door for John.
“Ladies first.” Freddie snickered, patting Johns back as he crawled inside.
“Oh, and that makes you a gentleman? Please.” John buckled up, and Freddie got in beside him, doing the same.
“Where to?” The driver asked, and Freddie covered John’s ears.
“Bosworth, is that fine?”
“It’ll be about half an hour, that good?” Freddie nodded, and moved his hands to Johns shoulders.
“Oh, Love, we’re going to have so much fun…”
The two talked and laughed in the back of the cab, the ride taking closer to an hour, though neither boy minded. They were dropped off, and the cab sped away as they started walking together. Once they were surely alone, Freddie grabbed John’s hand.
“Oh… How I do love how you look in the moonlight.” Freddie smiled, a soft, genuine smile that made John’s heart warm.
“Really? I’m sure I look just the same…” John laughed, and Freddie stopped walking once they’d finally reached the water.
“No, you look magnificent. Not to say you don’t always but… You truly take my breath away, like this.” John bit his lip, pausing with Freddie and looking out at the lake.
“Fred… You don’t… have to say things like that. Just because we’re friends and such… You don’t have to compliment me left and right. I enjoy just spending time with you.” Freddie looked taken aback, and he shook his head.
“Johnathan, don’t say things like that. I don’t compliment you because I have to. Or because I’ve nothing to say- or anything like that. I compliment you because I truly think you are one of the most fantastic, beautiful, perplexing people I’ve ever met, darling. Oh… how you confuse me.” Freddie mumbled the last sentence under his breath, John just barely catching it. John looked to Freddie, noticing how the moon shined in his eyes, and how his hair was perfectly brushed into place. John’s mouth went dry, and he licked his lips before speaking,
“I confuse you?” John asked, gripping Freddie’s hand tighter and coming to a stop. Freddie turned to face him, sighing. He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes before speaking- much to John’s dismay.
“Oh… John… I have been so enamoured of you since the day we met.” Freddie turned his head down to the ground, “I’ve wanted you, and only you, all these years… How could you not tell? I want to be in love… with you. Not for you.. And… that’s partly why I asked you on this trip. I want you to be my love.” The confession had John in tears, eyes welling up. As his eyes welled, the sky seemed to cry with them, the rain starting to drip from the clouds.
“Fred… I… I can’t.” John whispered, and the tears began to roll down his face. Freddie lifted his head, showing a large grin- but John knew better.
“Oh- don’t be ridiculous, dear! I know! It… I never expected it to happen. I just felt I must tell you so you may leave if it disgusts you…” John let go of Freddie’s hand, and, much to both of their own surprise, John hugged Freddie tightly.
“Never, Freddie. I’d never leave you for something like that. Thank you for telling me.” He whispered, and Freddie hugged back. John pulled away, touching his fingers to Freddie’s face gently. “Your… you life, it is going to be very... Very difficult.” John whispered, and Freddie nodded softly, understanding what he meant. The two stayed in each others arms, standing in the moonlight and rain for hours.
John laughed, now, reminiscing on that night. He remembered how right he was, that both of them had gotten terrible colds and had a mutual friend- Brian May- come help them through the sickness. Freddie huffs at John, elbowing him gently in the side.
“What are you laughing about, dear?” Freddie asks, and John smiles to himself. They’re alone, smoking on the balcony of their hotel room.
“Do you remember when I first got my hair cut? And you took me to Bosworth for the first time?” John took a long drag, leaning down on the cold railing.
“How could I forget? I still can’t believe I got the guts to confess.” Freddie mimicked John, who was now letting the smoke out through his nose.
“Me either.” John turned as the slide door opened.
“Fred, John, Bri and I are going down to the casino. You right alone?” Roger asked, fixing his hair with a sigh. Freddie grinned, and pat Roger’s back.
“Of course darling! Go off, we may just catch up.” Roger gave a thumbs up before the two left, John now staring off and into the moon. Freddie stared at his friend for a while, before taking another puff from his cigarette. “Why do you bring up that night, anyway?” John stood up straight, biting his lip.
“Fred… I couldn’t say this then, because I was still with Veronica. As you’re aware… we had our children. But… Fred.” John sniffled, tears starting to fall. Freddie came close, putting out his cigarette to wipe John’s tears with both of his thumbs.
“What is it, love?” John put his own hand on Freddie’s, and took a deep breath. He quickly threw his own cigarette to the ground and stomped it out.
“Being with you has been the most fun I’ve ever had in my life. You make me so vigorously happy, you make this whole thing worth it. Even if Queen hadn't jumped, or if people suddenly stopped buying our records… I would want to be with you. Whether that be as friends or otherwise… Freddie I think… I think I…,” John chokes, and now whispers, “I think i’m in love with you.” he finishes, tears still falling from his eyes as Freddie just stares at him. John breaks down, and Freddie shushes him.
“Oh, John, shh, it’s okay. It’s okay. I… I love you too, John. Of course, I still love you so much.” Freddie started petting back John’s hair, and brought him in for a hug. “You’re still everything to me, of course you are.”John’s crying came to a stop over the course of a minute or so, and he pulled away. He wiped his own tears, and looked at Freddie.
“But?” He asks, and Freddie takes both of John’s hands in his own sadly.
“I can’t be with you, John… You still have children… and…” Freddie took a deep breath, staring John directly in the eyes.
“I have it, John. I can’t be with you because I can’t dare to get you sick. I’d rather die a slow, painful death than you become sick because of me.” John’s eyebrows furrowed, and he put the pieces together.
“You… you have… No. No, tell me it’s not…” The tears began to sneak up on John again, and now Freddie began crying as well.
“I love you, John. I am so… so sorry I waited to tell you for so long. Surely you’ve noticed…” John shakes his head in disbelief, and Freddie bites his lip to hold back the tears. “I won’t be around very long. But I want to spend all the time I have.. With you. And the boys- making music. Don’t tell them, please.” Freddie begs, and John stares at the cement.
“Freddie… I am so...so sorry.” Freddie tilts his head to the side, and holds John’s face in his hands.
“You’ve nothing to be sorry for, my love.” John pulls Freddie into another hug, and John sniffles against him.
“Maybe if I’d confessed sooner…” Freddie kisses John’s head.
“It’s not your fault, John. I was reckless, and stupid. I’m sorry I won’t get to spend more time with you. But… For what it’s worth.” Freddie pulled John away, and he sniffled. “I want to be your Valentino. “ Freddie laughs, wiping away his own tears. “And I want you to be my Clementine.” The words clicked for John, and he remembered the, now very old, song Freddie had written.
“Fred… The song…” Freddie grinned.
“You’ve finally noticed.” John broke down into tears again, and nodded enthusiastically.
“Yes- Yes Fred. I love you. I will, I’ll stay by your side every last moment- I swear to you.”
“Thank you, John. I love you. I love you.” Freddie whispers, rubbing John’s back.
The sliding door creaked open.
“Bad timing but do either of you happen to have my wallet?” Brian asked, and both men jumped away from each other.
“What- Oh- Oh fuck.” John mumbled, reaching into his coat pocket and handing Brian the thick wad of cash.
“Please don’t spend it all, we do still need to buy food this month.” John grumbled, and Brian grinned.
“Right, thanks. See you. Have fun making out, or whatever.” Brian turned and walked out of the hotel once again, leaving the two red faced and confused.