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It had been a year since meg’s death. A year since Dan had felt the loving embrace of a warm body securing him to the earth. He missed it. Despite the flirty and playboy-ish act, he was a romantic at heart. No one-night-stand would give him what he needed. He needed genuine, loving, physical affection from someone who loved him. He needed to love someone in return. Ever since Meg, Dan hadn’t found anyone like her. No one even came close, except him. Herbert West, the man who indirectly caused her death, who ruined and traumatized dan to no end. He was the only one who stayed. Dan knew it was too good to be true, when Herbert had given in to his drunken sexual advances. He knew Herbert didn’t really care, that he only wanted dan around for his assistance and physical ability. But that was enough for him then, to be needed for anything. Dan eventually stopped bringing women home, and Herbert seemed pleased by this. He scolded Dan less, and wasn’t quite as on-edge. Dan liked this. It made him feel like he was doing something right for once.
Some nights Herbert would allow himself to be used as a sexual outlet for Dan’s frustrations. He hardly reciprocated, unless Dan asked.
“It’s a temporary, but necessary distraction,” he’d say after, when dan questions. “To keep you focused.” Dan supposed he’s right. Abstinence had never been good for him, it did more harm than good. But sex wasn’t what Dan craved from his roommate and partner. He liked the rush, the heat and passion of those moments, of course. But fire always burns out eventually, and Dan’s flame was burning out quicker and quicker each day. He needed something softer, a steady, sustainable warmth to keep his fire crackling away.
Would Herbert allow cuddling? That was the question on Dan’s mind as they worked through the night. The young scientist had never seemed the type for it, although his small and petite frame suggests he’d be perfect against Dan’s large and rather gangly form. Dan sighed, letting the tools he’d been holding drop to the sterile table with a clatter. Herbert looked up, eyes wide in idle curiosity.
“Is something wrong, Dan?” He asked evenly, inquisitive to his partner’s sudden minor outburst.
“I need.... something. From you...” Dan starts nervously. Herbert tsks.
“You know there’s no shame in needing to be satisfied. Speak up,” At this, Dan waved his hand dismissively
“No, not that kind of thing.”
“Than what?” He could hear the lilt of frustration growing in Herbert’s voice. Mysteries never seemed to excite the man, only frustrate and spur him into action. Good.
“I need... um, well... you’re not a cuddling kind’a guy, are you?”
“No, im not.” Was herbert’s flat, immediate response. Dan shriveled. Of course he wasn’t. What was he thinking, asking such a dumb and obvious question?
“Y-yeah, I thought so. Sorry for askin-“
“I didn’t say I wouldn’t, Dan. Don’t jump to conclusions before I finish.”
The taller man was shocked into silence, his mouth slightly agape. This all seemed rather surreal, for multiple reasons. First, imagining the great Herbert West cuddling was strange enough on its own. Second, the thought of another body providing warmth and comfort filled Dan with an elation he hadn’t felt in ages.
“Shut your mouth, you’ll catch flies,” Herbert sighed, standing up and gathering the scattered tools. “Go upstairs and wait for me. I’ll join you soon enough.”
Without needing to be told again, Dan raced up the stairs with an almost childlike excitement. Quickly stripping of the bloody medical garb, he changed into a pair of worn old sweatpants. Ditching any shirt, it left Dan in just socks and said sweats. With a nervous shiver, Dan made his way to Herbert’s bedroom, careful to avoid any special-looking equipment.
The waiting took a while longer than Dan had hoped, and he thought maybe Herbert was just going to stay down in their cloistered lap till Dan fell asleep on his own. But he did eventually come up, looking more tired than before, and a bit more caked in blood. Dan softened, affectionate instincts finally overflowing and breaking the dam. He stood up, approaching the man in the doorway.
“Let me take care of you,” he started, bringing his hands up to almost touch herbert’s chest.
“I can take care of myself,” he flinched, gaze flickering down to Dan’s hands. Ever the intuitive man when it came to people, Dan dropped his hands.
“Please, Herbert. Let me take care of you...” he murmured. He saw Herbert sigh again, even heavier this time around.
“...fine. Do whatever you ‘need’ to do. Stop if i say so.” The smaller man said stiffly. Dan smiles gratefully
“Of course.”
With that, he brought his hands up again, slower this time. First, he undid Herbert’s tie. That got tossed to the side (much to Herbert’s dismay), along with his bloodied button-up, shoes, and slacks. Dan dug briefly through the severely lacking dresser, before finding a hardly-worm pear of button down pajamas. Herbert frowned upon seeing them.
“Only the shirt. I get overheated with the pants.” He seemed embarrassed to admit this, but Dan only nodded and returned the bottoms to the drawer. He dressed Herbert in the shirt like a loyal squire would his knight, taking great care with each button. Despite the furrowed brow and ever-present sneer, Dan could feel Herbert relaxing a bit under his touch. That made Dan swell with a sense of pride. He felt wanted, maybe even appreciated.
Herbert’s bed was hardly used, as Herbert himself hardly slept; When he did, it was usually in the lab’s cot or living room couch. It had a few books stacked on top, which Dan carefully lifted off and placed on the floor. He then stepped aside, allowing Herbert to make himself comfortable first. He did this quickly, lying flat on his back and folding his hands on his chest, ankles crossed. Decidedly not relaxed, but he supposed that’s better than nothing. He climbed in after, curling around Herbert’s still-rigid form. He was surprisingly warm, and Dan shivered again.
“Have you ever cuddled before, Herb?”
“Herbert. And no, I’ve never felt the need.”
“Well you’re too stiff. Try to relax a bit, and maybe you’ll learn to like it.” With that, Dan pulled one of Herbert’s hands off his chest and pressed a light kiss to his knuckles. This drew a sharp inhale from the aforementioned.
“Sorry-“ Dan offered quickly, moving to let go on Herbert’s hand. The young scientist seemed to have different plans.
“No, its... alright. Continue.”
Dan did. Holding herbert’s hand in his own and gently pressing his thumb into his palm, he attempted a sort of pseudo-massage to help Herbert relax. It seemed to help minimally. Dan’s own breathing had slowed, his focus on Herbert clearing his mind of anything that came before. Herbert himself seemed equally focussed on Dan, but in not quite the same way. His dark eyes were locked on Dan, watching every move he made. To anyone else, this might have appeared unsettling, but to Dan is was par for the course. Herbert liked to watch, to observe, rather than interfere if he could help it. At least when it came to human matters, like affection or domestic skills. Dan liked to think he was taking notes in that brilliant brain of his.
Herbert shifted position, laying more on his side rather than his back.
“Finally getting comfortable?” Dan spoke softly, teasing Herbert just a bit.
“Stop talking.” Came the sharp response, but there was no underlying malice, no frustration or disappointment. Just an order, and one that Dan was all too happy to follow. He maneuvered closer to his partner, making them almost chest to chest. He could feel Herbert’s shallow breath on his neck now, and said man made no move to oppose this.