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After high school, they never kept in touch, even though they had gotten along just fine during their third year, it had been going so well. Once they graduated, Todoroki moved away. They needed heroes all over Japan, so it was not an uncommon thing to happen. However it led to him not talking to the now famous Ground Zero anymore. The half and half man did not show up at any hero meetings, which was understandable considering he lived really far, so they didn't have an opportunity to see each other.
But while he'd still managed to keep in touch with all of his friends from UA, one had been forgotten and it was the angry blond.
Meaning they never met again for 8 years, so the blond simply erased him from his life. It was only payback, in his opinion. Then there was this day. A villain attack at the train station, this one had used his Quirk make trains collide. The only hero nearby was the blond. Since a lot of heroes were at UA, to watch this year's sport festival, considering that the blond would have never missed an opportunity to fight a villain and get credits for it, he stayed. Even if he was not obsessed by being the best anymore, he still wanted to be the number one, the one who was going to keep Japan safe from villains.
The villain had messed up with one of the train and this one was going to collide with another one, with passengers on board. The blond was currently between those two trains, one getting closer to him, to take his life, so he was thinking hard, he had to find a solution to save everyone without either killing himself or destroying one or the two trains. However the only thing he could think of was blowing off the first train with no passengers in order to make it stop. There was still a chance that it wouldn't stop, that it would crush him between those two trains, but it was a risk he was willing to take, to prevent the passengers' death.
As he prepared his gauntlets, ready to make a huge explosion, some thoughts quickly ran through his mind, the kind he would have never talked about to anyone. He saw his mother, his father, his family, his friends, people he cared about but lost. He felt like he was going to die, but if it was going to happen, he was not going down without pulling up a fight.
He was sweating like crazy as it kept getting closer, but it only meant that his explosion was going to be huge.
Then it happened, just when he was facing death, the first train was suddenly pushed to the side, but it did not fell down nor broke, it had gotten supported by an enormous wall of ice, which seemed to be also the reason why the train was pushed. The blond longly stared at the wall of ice, then he followed the trail of ice, and discovered that it came from the second train.
Then, the doors opened, catching his attention, he watched the passengers of the second train get off, his eyes were drawn to white, red, gray, blue. As if he was expecting something. No, someone. His near-death experience was probably responsible, but for now, he just glanced around, like he'd gotten lost in this crowd, all by himself. They all passed by him, some pointed at him with excited smiles, others were too worried to pay attention to the hero. He had forgotten them also ; his instinct, it was all he cared about, right now.
He started to walk toward this second train, against the flow of the crowd, desperately trying to reach the doors, he felt like he had lost his mind, but it also still felt so right. He had to push several people, not even sparring a glance at them. He had to get there. Just to make sure.
Then he paused, once he was in front of the doors, still bothering the passengers who were trying to get out of the train. They all went through hell there, when they saw the first train, ready to take their lives. He also went through hell, which probably explained his current state, it had been hell for eight years.
He let go of the breath he did not know he was holding, when he got a sight of what he'd wanted to erase from his life, like he'd been erased. Of course, he had to be there, helping people get out of the train calmly, as professional as he should be.
It was painful but, at the same time, it felt so relieving, just looking at him was soothing, even though the gesture was not returned, which was painful. He could have called out his name, gotten his heterochromatic eyes on him, his full attention on an out of breath blond, who looked miserable, right now.
However, it did not happen. He was a professional, that was why he had left, because he was too good of a person, when he let it show. His mother, she was probably proud of who he was now, a great hero, a role model, someone kids looked up to. He looked better than he'd ever looked, seemed like his life had been going great, for 8 years, he finally looked like he truly had full control of his life, he had probably mastered life itself.
His eyes, they used to be so distant, like he himself did not want to look anywhere, now they were reassuring, trying to reach people with some blue, gray, some light. The blond thought that he had never looked this fine, without the blond around, that was until those same eyes noticed him, they widened at his sight, invaded by the sunlight, making them shine, just so the blond could keep looking at them, like their brightness could express his feelings, how he was now that he had seen the other hero for the first time after 8 years.
He stopped giving directions, he only stared at the distant figure, who was doing the same, feeling like he could break down any moment, he could have cried, let all those sad tears out, but his heart was pounding with excitement, he could not believe that he was finally there, in front of him. He was torn apart by his own feelings, it was painful.
Now there were no passengers anymore between them, they had all left, probably waiting for a new train, probably staring at the two heroes facing each other. It did not matter at all to the blond, he took one slow step forward, examining the other's gaze, who did not let go of his. Then he ran as fast as he could, like his own life was his danger like earlier, he ran to the person he had chosen to erase from his life.
The other one did not move one bit, his feet were stuck to the ground. Once the blond had finally reached him, he gave him a solid punch, that made the half and half boy stumble, to keep his balance. Then the local hero pulled him into a tight embrace, gripping at the other's shirt like a lifeline, he did not want to let go anymore. He did not receive anything in return, and it made him grip tighter, now he was starting to feel insecure.
“ Bakugou ” he heard the other say discreetly, as to not trouble anyone. The blond softened his grip, in order to take a step back and look at the man in front of him. He apprehended as if he was going to see disgust in his eyes, he probably did not want to ever hear from the local hero again, that was probably why he had forgotten the blond completely, he had just wanted him out of his life.
“ Hear me first ” he began, wanting to get everything off his chest, before the other would disappear once again, this one called out his name again, as if to make him stop, but the blond tried to talk again, he was not going to keep quiet. Or so he thought. That was until he noticed that they were not by themselves, he was linked to someone, their hands holding tight.
“ You-... ” he tried once again, but this time he was the one who interrupted himself, he was not able to formulate a correct sentence right now.
“ I have to go ” was the other's reply, shattering the blond's hopes once again, he wondered why it was so difficult to simply express himself, he had wanted to say those lines for a long time, he had repeated them in his mind over and over again. But all of this turned out so bad. He had stopped wishing for him to come back but now that he was there, in front of him, he just wished he would never go again, but this hand he was holding was just proof that it was not going to happen.
Then, the half and half boy walked passed him, with this other person that Bakugou never got to know, and wish he'd never have. The local hero did not turn around to look at the other go, he just laughed bitterly, like he was just about to break down, explode.
“ You know what ? Go fuck yourself ” he began, his voice was not too loud for now, so it did not attract anyone else's attention, whereas the hand holding the dual quirk user tightened, and the blond sort of felt relieved to terrorize this other person. “ You're a huge piece of shit, and you've always been one. I can't believe I wasted my fucking time on you ” the more he raised his tone, the more it began to mix with tears, his throat had tightened a lot, and it was easy to hear.
The half and half boy had looked back at him, during his talk, and his eyes were wide, he was obviously hurt by those words, and that was what they were aiming for, to be painful to his old classmate.
“ You think you're fucking successful because you formed a goddamn family, became a hero ? Lemme remind you where you come from, dipshit, if it hadn't been for me, you would have probably killed yourself by now ” he was now yelling, thankfully, only few people noticed what was going on, most of the passengers were too busy trying to re schedule their travel.
The other boy seemed not able to answer the attacks, he did not want to fight back, he couldn't make a correct sentence in his mind, even though he was trying hard, he only came back to himself, when he felt his hand being pulled, repetitively. He looked down at the small girl beside him, who was worryingly looking up at him “ I wanna go, dad ” she then glanced at the blond, silently, and looked back at her father “ I wanna see grandma ”.
“ We're going, just... ” he briefly gazed at the blond, as if he was hesitating to even talk to him, he did not even try to finish his sentence, once their eyes met. He knelt down in front of the white-haired kid, gave her his phone, and whispered something to her, probably reassuring her, she only nodded to his words. Then he stood back up, facing the local hero once again.
“ Let's talk about it later ” was what he said, making the blond frown, clearly not pleased with this proposition. “ Let's meet here tonight at 9 pm, I'll wait ”. Then he simply took his daughter's hand and walked away, without waiting for the blond's answer, who was now extremely pissed. However he did know that he had to report the incident with the trains to the police so he had to go with it, for now. He did not know if he was going to join the other boy tonight, he would have gladly let him freeze outside, but he also did not want his thoughts to be left unspoken.
9:23 pm. He was sitting on his couch, starting to play a movie on his TV that he liked a lot, he was not going to go the meeting, he was going to make him pay for those 8 years. He focused on the TV but, somehow he got distracted, this scene right now, it felt familiar, and yet it made him feel so lonely. He remembered that time, when he had been sitting on this same couch, watching this same movie, in this same room, with this man. He could have almost felt his breath on his neck once again, but solitude was not new to him anymore, he had learned to live with it.
But still. Still, he felt it now, it bothered him to the core, this loneliness. The whole room seemed too gray to him, so monotonous. He sat in this dull room, and felt like he wished to be elsewhere, somewhere greater than there on this couch that he'd sat on over and over again. He had gotten tired of all this dullness, he always did at some point.
But for some reason, he found himself standing up, putting on a coat, go out and run like his life was on the line. He ran as fast as he could, at some point even pushing himself forward with some explosions, he was going to make it.
9:47pm.
He arrived, completely out of breath, he immediately looked for a red and white head, but all he saw was blue, projected from the dark night. He walked to the chairs, thinking that he was probably there but, there was nobody. What if there had never been anybody ? He looked desperately around him, hopping to see him, to be able to express those 8 years in hell to someone who could have actually helped him to get through it.
He was too late. His pride was the only responsible for this whole situation. He let himself fall on his knees, trembling a lot, almost like he was going to cry but he was just desperate, he never got out of hell. He was still trapped in there, and Todoroki being there had not been his chance to escape, but a cruel punishment.
He stayed still for a moment, his whole body was shaking, and his breathing was irregular, it felt like he was going to suffocate and die. Now dying seemed like the safest option to escape his fate, years and years of upcoming suffering. He never got to talk, and now it was stuck in his throat, making it hard for him to live.
Then, he heard footsteps behind him, he looked up, wanting to know who he was going to kill so that they would have never been able to tell anyone what they'd just witnessed. However, it was only relief when he saw those shades of red and white turned blue by the night. He was able to breathe again, his heart was not pounding as fast, he felt alive again.
They stared at each other for a long time, before the dual quirk user walked to the blond, leaving his hot cup on a chair, before he knelt down in front of the blond, they were now at the same height, making them both equally miserable. He did not try to make any contact with the local hero, he just stared at him, making his gaze navigate between the two crimson pearls.
“ I thought you would never come ” the half and half boy began, with a low voice, one that revealed his emotions, right now it was just worry, anxiety perhaps “ and it fucking scared me ”. He did not curse as much as the blond did, but when he did, it meant that he was speaking sincerely.
“ You sound a lot different from earlier ” the blond pointed out, not giving in to the sweet words that had been spoken to him. He did not believe what he had said but still, the air seemed hotter after he'd said that, it was probably just the natural heat emitting from him, he told himself.
“ My daughter was panicking ” was his justification, then he sighed, and you could now see his breath, it showed just how cold it currently was. It was probably a terrible idea to meet outside at night, when the air was really cool. “ You do sound different too ”.
“ Fuck off, I was mad ” he tried to push the other boy, hoping to make him loose his balance, but he landed nicely on his hand, his expression was indifferent, as if he did not care one bit that he'd just been thrown to the ground. At least, he was not looking annoyed like he would have been for the same action during their first year at UA. They had been constantly at each other's throat, what a time it had been for them. If they had known, they probably would have done it differently then, now that they knew that they did not always had time to catch up.
“ I know ” was all he replied before he paused, then he looked to the ground, letting his finger play with the dust on the floor, as if he had nothing to say, trying to distract himself so that he would not look like he was not able to handle a conversation. However, he then gazed back to the blond, and simply asked in a low voice, barely above a whisper “ you meant it ? ”
The blond stayed quiet to collect his thoughts, he had been a dick earlier, he had to admit, but it was difficult to actually do so to the half and half boy, he'd never been the type to apologize. Even if he'd already apologized to his old classmate, shared his most intimate thoughts, revealed himself to him. It was all in the past now, they could never go back to these times, there were many reasons why they couldn't. “ You should know ” the blond answered, as he studied the other's gaze, as if to make sure that he would have gotten his point, he wished he did.
“ I'm relieved ” he said, as he smiled a little, then it faded, and he looked back at the ground, like earlier. There was a long silence, but they both knew that they had something to talk about, their lines were all ready in their mind, but they were left unspoken, for many reasons. Pride, values, fear, apprehension. They had a lot to talk about but, not the heart to express.
The blond stared at the half and half boy, observed as his expressions changed, reacting to his own thoughts, he was frowning. Was it that difficult to say out loud ? Perhaps it was just pain, it was insufferable for the both of them, they knew that their time together was counted, but still they had so much to say, too much, to the point where it was difficult to make it short.
Instead, the blond chose to talk about something else, because he did not want to express his thoughts out loud, it was not right to. He broke the silence, by simply declaring in a dull tone “ so, you're married, huh ”. The half and half boy looked up to him, almost looking confused, as if he'd expected a whole different scenario in his mind. Like the blond had crossed a line that he shouldn't have had. “ damn you're even a father ”.
At the end of his sentence, his throat had tightening, exposing his true feelings about all of this, he couldn't stand it, it killed him. For 8 years he disappeared, during those years he had met a girl whom he had loved enough to have a daughter with, this one was probably the proudest of her dad. Every evening, when he got home, he probably had his daughter jump in his arms, and then his wife joined them, and planted a kiss on her husband's lips, a fond smile forming on them. They were probably an happy family, and it was hurting, it was hurting the blond a lot.
“ You moved on easily, huh ” he snickered at the end of his sentence, but it got mixed up with a sob, that he had not been able to contain, he was hopping that it would have gone unnoticed. The more he expressed his thoughts, the more it was hurting him, he felt like his heart was being pulled out of his chest, to be exposed to the half and half boy, just so he could step on it. “ Goddammit ” he swore under his breath, as if the man just in front of him would have not been able to hear it.
However he did not need to hear to know, his heterochromatic eyes were highly focused on the blond who was now almost breaking down in front of him, he looked in so much pain, that words were not necessary to understand. The father knew, he knew.
“ We dated for two years, for fuck's sake, and it's been 8 years since then ” the blond began, his body was shaking more and more as he let the words out, it felt like he was getting them out of his heart by force, just so they could have been expressed, and heard. It was a terrible sight in front of the half and half boy, his own heart was threatening to burst “ 8 fucking years, and goddammit I can't ” now tears were streaming down his face, but he let them be, what mattered to him was what he was trying to say.
He stared right into the other's eyes and asked, with a trembling voice “ why can't I fucking get over it ? ”, and just this sentence was enough to shake the other's whole world. His new life, the one he'd established without him, it was crumbling to pieces, all his efforts to keep him away. His own walls were shattering, he felt like he could burst into tears just like his ex boyfriend, the first one he had ever loved.
He could not express anything, so he simply leaned toward the blond, and surrounded him with his now trembling arms, and held him like the other had done earlier. Now, he was the one, who did not want to let go. The blond did not return the gesture, instead he let it all out, he cried in his arms, without holding back, because it felt so right, so private. It was just the two of them, no wife, no daughter, just the both of them.
He stayed quiet, not wanting to interrupt the blond's moment, if he wanted to cry, then he should let him until he was finally ready to speak once again. He did not want to push him, even though they knew that they only had a limited period of time, before they were not each other's anymore. It was what it felt like to them at least, but to the eyes of the law, of the ethic, they were just two grown-up men breaking down now that they had found each other again. They did not need to act like couples, this intimacy that they shared right now, was what their love was all about.
Once the blond had calmed down, he stayed in the other's embrace, none of them trying to get away from each other, it just felt right. They did not talk for a moment, probably because the blond was done with his confessions, he wanted to hear what the other had to say about that.
“ It is true that I got married, I'm sorry ” was the other's confession, breaking the comfortable silence between them that had settled down, perhaps he could have heard the sound of the blond's heart break if he hadn't been talking at the same time. The temperature seemed to have dropped drastically, their embrace felt so cold now, there was no familiarity in it anymore. “ I had a hard time burying my feelings after you had broken up with me, so once you were out of my mind, my life entirely, I allowed myself to get in a relationship ”.
He paused for a moment, feeling the blond's cold breath on his neck, making him shiver. “ When I realized that I still cared about you, I learned that I was going to be a father ” he stopped once again, and the blond hated that this story had to be any longer, he knew his mistake there, he did not want to know what were the consequences of that. “ No matter how much I tried, this relationship never felt right. ”
The local hero felt genuinely bad for what he was hearing, because he had chosen to break up with the other boy, this one had a family with a woman that he couldn't love, despite his wish to. The blond imagined in his head a scenario in which he would have never broken up with the half and half boy, maybe it would have been better for the both of them. Even if the reason the blond had chosen to broke up, had been because his boyfriend had been given an interesting job on the other side of Japan. It was a one time opportunity, however it meant leaving the blond behind, because this one had already been working in an agency. They couldn't have stayed together, unless one of them had given up a great opportunity to fulfill their dream.
So the blond had broken up, not only for himself, but also for his ex boyfriend. They had both devoted their life to become great heroes, it mattered a lot to them, they had fought to be where they had been then, the half and half boy had had a mediocre childhood because of it, the blond had pushed himself to the point of breaking because of it. So for their sake, he had chosen to give up on their relationship.
“ She noticed at some point ” the half and half boy continued, getting the blond out of his mind, his scenarios, in which they could have loved each other properly. Not suffering in silence, erasing each other, just so they could try to move on unsuccessfully. These nights when they had looked up at their ceiling and had thought of each other before burying all kind of memory in the back of their mind. “ She left me ”.
The blond's eyes widened, as mixed emotions submerged him, he was either going to break down because all of these mediocre years had only brought sadness to the both of them, or grin because he had an occasion to make the half and half boy stay with him. He did none of them, he just stayed quiet.
“ My daughter is affected by our separation, she does not understand, and I do not want her to, which explains why I tried to cut you off earlier. ” he continued “ just like my own father, I ruined my child's life because of a loveless marriage ”.
The blond, as soon as he heard those words, pulled back, now facing the other boy, staring at him, with his eyebrows furrowed, as he had surrounded the other's head with his hands, as if to keep him in touch with reality. “ Don't ” the local hero began, making his eyes navigate between gray and blue, determination filled his eyes, he could not let this pass. “ Your father mistreated your family so baddly, this piece of shit still haunts you nowadays. Your kid, you're her hero, you'd have to be dumb not to notice ".
The half and half boy stayed quiet, he just stared back at the blond, looking like a miserable man, and his ex boyfriend couldn't stand to see this expression on his face. He still cared for his happiness, that was why he had broken up with him, he had cared enough to give up his own, just for his sake, but it had done nothing but breaking them for 8 years.
Now here they were, kneeling on the floor, looking like they'd lost everything to each other, when they were supposed to be feeling better now that they had accomplished their dream, but they had never thought of an after. So now they were goalless people, who had nowhere to go, they were going to live a routine until they die, nothing exceptional, just wandering without a purpose in life.
“ I can't move on ” the father concluded, never letting go of the crimson red eyes, just proving how sincere he was, he didn't want to hide anymore, so if the blond wanted to read his expression, try to detect any lie, he would let him. However the local hero didn't need to examine his ex boyfriend, he knew him, he trusted him, even more when it came to feelings, they had this intimacy that promised no lie, they were true to each other.
“ Stay then, idiot ”.
It was all the blond said, as he let his hands fall from the other's face, to land on the cold ground they were kneeling on. The half and half man broke the eye contact, to look back at the ground again, meaning that he wished he could talk about something but cannot express it. The blond figured that it was going to be difficult, he had a life out there, after all.
Instead of answering, the half and half boy simply took the blond's face gently, and leaned in slowly, giving a chance to the other man to reject the gesture. Meeting no resistance, he pressed their lips together softly, and the blond wrapped his arms around his ex lover's waist, this time he did not grip on his clothes, he simply let his hand rest on the other's back, liking the warmth underneath, as well as the one emitting from their sweet contact.
The blond had missed his warmth so much, it was so relaxing, after a harsh training in UA, he had always been glad to be embraced by it, it was a sweet relief. When they pulled away from each other, they briefly stared at each other, before the dual quirk user glanced at the train station, probably thinking about his dilemma, they were completely silent now. Then, the half and half man looked back at his old classmate, and broke the silence by saying “ There are so many reasons why I can't come here ” he paused, noticing the disappointment in the other's eyes “ I have this contract with an agency for a year, my daughter still misses her engaged parents, I made some nice acquaintances, I would have to sell the house ”.
The blond almost wanted to ask him to stop making the list grow, he did not want to know why it was impossible, he just wished they could be together, as if they had not been away from each other for 8 years, he wanted to rewind to the time where they were allowed to be together, in an happy and healthy relationship.
The half and half boy seemed to have the same thoughts, judging by his saddened eyes, fate was against them, and they were both exhausted by these years, they were not ready for it to begin again. The dual quirk user closed his eyes, sighing longly before he said “ I don't want to make the same mistake. So... ” his eyes lightened a bit, and the blond's heart started to ponder with excitement, his gaze was hopeful. “ Give me a year, please ”.
“ You'd better no take your damn sweet time ” the blond answered, as he took the other's hand to handshake it, but then he simply held his hand for a moment. They were silent for a moment, appreciating the warmth shared between their hands, then the blond said mostly to himself “ another year, huh ”.
They kept each other company for another moment before, the half and half man had to leave, it was almost his daughter's bedtime, and he knew that if he didn't come back, she wouldn't have slept until he was there. The father planted a kiss on his lover's lips before he walked away, his now cold cup in his hand. The blond watched him leave, wishing he could have just stayed there with him. Once he was out of sight, he already missed him.
“ 9 years ” he told himself, setting a mental alarm to a year from now, the time when he'll stop missing him, and finally fix their old mistake. He sure was not ready to have the other's daughter around, and she probably wasn't either but, he had a year to prepare. One more year, and the time already seemed to have slowed down to prevent him from getting what he's been silently wanting for the past eight years.