Chapter Text
“Ah shit!” Jae yelled as the rain began to pelt down on you. The skies opened up and the downpour was almost painful. You were soaked within seconds, the cold water seeping into your shirt and causing a shiver to run down your spine.
“I forgot it was going to rain.” You whined, trying to shield your face from the torrential downpour. A warm hand took your cold ones, and you looked up to see Jae grinning down at you. His fingers were long and hot compared to your icy ones. He pulled you through the rain and you were thankful he was taking the lead because you couldn’t see more than a foot in front of your face.
You ducked inside a small cafe, and you were instantly warmer in the heat of the building. You felt bad as a puddle collected under your feet, but moments after you, another person came barreling in who was even more drenched than you.
“It doesn’t look like this rain is going stop for at least an hour.” Jae said, frowning at his phone. His other hand was still laced in yours, and you weren’t about to pull them apart any time soon.
“Might as well get some coffee to warm up in the meantime.” You laugh a little, pulling him towards the counter where a sympathetic barista was ready to take your order. You settled into a little corner table, far from the door so the draft of guests coming and going wouldn’t make you any colder and waited for your drinks.
“Your lips are blue.” You said with a small smirk. Jae looked shocked before grinning at you.
“Why don’t you warm them up then?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. You blushed a little but leaned in nonetheless, pressing your warm lips against his cold ones. He smiled into the kiss, his hand finding yours under the table. A small cough made you break away.
“I’m so sorry.” You squeaked as the barista put your drinks down on the table. She smiled and waved a hand.
“Don’t apologize,” She said, tucking the tray under her arm. “You guys are cute together. Besides, I’ve seen customers do worse.” She shuttered and you could only guess what kind of horrors she had seen behind that counter.
“Thank you.” You said, smiling again as she walked away. You both took your drinks and blew at the steam that was rising from the handmade mugs.
The first sip warmed you to your bones and you couldn’t help let out a small moan of happiness. Jae just chuckled, watching you close your eyes as you take a second sip. He started humming under his breath, and you could almost put a name to the tune but it was just out of reach.
“Falling for you,” He sang quietly, eyes smiling at you over the edge of his mug. “Falling for you once again~”
“Jae…” You blushed and tried to hide your face, which made him grin wider.
“I’m falling for you,” he sang a little louder. The couple at the table next to you turned and smiled at the two of you. “I’m falling for you once again. Falling for you~ falling for you~ falling for you once again.”
“You’re so cheesy.” You felt yourself tearing up.
“Ah, but you love it.” He put his mug down and reached across the small table. He took your mug from your hands and set it aside before taking your hands in his. His fingers were warm from the drink, and calloused from years of playing the guitar, but they were also so soft and gentle with you that you never felt anything but loved.
“And I can’t help~” You sang back, your cheeks lighting up. “Falling in love~ With~ You~”
“You’re just as bad as I am.” He said, love and laughter dancing behind the rims of his glasses.
“But you love it.” You grinned back and his hands tightened on yours.
“I really do.” He leaned across the table and captured your lips again. They were warm this time, and tasted a little bitter, but his kisses were always the sweetest thing to you.
You didn’t even realize the rain had stopped, but you didn’t care. You were happy where you were, two cups of cooling coffee off to the side with his hands in yours and his smile reflecting your own.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jae asked, looking at you curiously. You just smiled and nodded, ignoring the weird feeling in the pit of your stomach. You knew your period was due soon, but you were pretty regular, and you knew you had at least four more days before you even had to start thinking about it.
“Yeah, must be something I ate.” You said, trying to push the weird feeling aside. It was going to be an easy day. The guys were recording bits and pieces to play with for the songs they were working on, and Jae invited you to come along and watch.
Even before you and Jae started dating, back when the two of you were just best friends, Day6 counted on you to give them honest feedback - even if that honesty ended up being a little harsh sometimes. They could always count on you to give real constructive criticism that would improve their music, which was why they wanted you there when they were recording the preliminary lines.
You let Jae go ahead when you slipped into the cafe to grab them drinks. They knew you, and your order - an iced americano for Sungjin, a chai latte for Wonpil, a strawberry refresher for Dowoon, a black coffee with two sugars for Younghyun and a caramel latte with soy milk for Jae.
Balancing the drinks was easy, you were used to it after so long of basically being the boy’s unofficial secretary. You bumped open the door to the recording studio with your hip and they let out a cheer.
“You’re an angel, you know that?” Sungjin said as he kissed your cheek and helped you pass out the drinks.
“At least someone appreciates me.” You lamented, holding Jae’s drink just out of reach. He rolled his eyes and grabbed you by the waist, pulling you flush against his chest.
“You’re a real brat sometimes.” he grinned as he took his cup and kissed your neck.
“You’re no better.” You smiled and wriggled away from him.
“Okay, so we’re going to have Younghyun go first,” Sungjin said, looking at his notebook. The bassist nodded and picked up his papers as he went into the recording booth. He started rapping a few lines, stopping every few minutes to listen to a correction from Sungjin, who seemed pretty pleased. When he came out, his eyes went straight to you, sitting on the couch under Jae’s arm as usual.
“Not bad,” You said honestly. “You rushed a few of the lines though. The second and third verses you recorded might sound better slowed down. Like, draw it out almost. But the first one was perfect. I’m always a slut for triplette raps.”
Younghyun nodded and looked at his paper, rapping the verses under his breath slower, dragging out certain notes.
“Damn, she’s right again,” he said, flopping onto the couch on your other side. “Why don’t we pay her again?”
“Because then she’d have to deal with shitty company policies,” Sungjin said, not looking away from the board. “And we pay her back in food and company literally every day.”
“That’s fair.”
“Wonpil, you’re next.” Sungjin said, fiddling with something. The pianist slipped into the booth and started recording his parts. He finished quicker than Younghyun, and you could see he was eager to be praised.
“Pillie that sounded good! Have you been practicing your low tones?” You asked, instantly noticing how his lower notes were more stable.
“Yeah!’” He grinned wide.
“I can tell. Your hard work is paying off. Be careful though, I could hear you going a little flat in your upper register. Try not to overcompensate.”
“Jae, you’re up.”
“See you in a bit babe.” Jae kissed your forehead and slipped his arm out from around you. You wrinkle your nose but couldn’t help a small smile. Younghyun glanced over to you with a sly smirk, and just as you were about to tell him off, you felt it.
Your face paled and you stood. Bad idea.
“Are you okay?” Younghyun asked, looking concerned. Jae was singing, not knowing anything was wrong.
“Fuck.” You cursed under your breath. You grabbed your bag and ran to the bathroom, praying you weren’t too late. You could feel the blood already soaking into your underwear, and you were grateful all your good panties were in the wash that morning.
You were able to get everything under control easily, but you knew you were royally fucked.
Normally, you knew when your cramps were going to start ahead of time, so you could take painkillers before you started to hurt. Now, it was too late. Even if you took something now, by the time it kicked in you would already be curled in a ball. Plus, your stash of painkillers was empty from the last time.
You were stranded.
You made your way back to the recording studio, praying that maybe this would be one of the rare months where you didn’t cramp that much, but the second you sat down you knew it wasn’t going to happen.
It felt like there was something in your abdomen trying to force its way out. It went from an uncomfortable pressure to you gritting your teeth trying to hold back tear in the span of ten minutes.
“Are you alright?” Jae asked, rubbing your back. You tried to sit upright, but a wave of pain caused you to whimper and curl into his side. His warmth made your walls come down and you found yourself crying into his shirt.
“Is she crying?” Dowoon sounded shocked. In all the time you knew them, you almost never cried. The only person who really ever saw you breakdown was Jae - he was the only one who you trusted enough to be vulnerable around.
“Shit, were you early this month?” Jae asked, trying to help you sit up. You nodded pitifully as another wave of pain wracked your body. You closed your eyes tight and held back a sob.
“Did you take anything?”
“No… I’m out and forgot to refill the bottle in my bag.” You ground out, wrapping your arms around your waist in a futile attempt to ease the soul crushing pain ripping through your body at the moment.
“Does anyone have painkillers?” He asked, looking around.
“I should, hold on,” Younghyun dug through his bag before triumphantly pulling out a familiar white bottle. “How many does she need?”
“Um, three-” Jae cut himself off when you sobbed again into his chest. “Four, for now.”
“You’re not supposed to take more than two…”
“She’s built up a tolerance,” Jae said, taking the pills from his friend. “She normally takes five when it gets this bad.”
“That can’t be good for her.” Sungjin said, watching you cry with faint horror.
“Come on love, can you sit up? I got you some advil.” Jae said softly to you, as if you weren’t able to hear their whole conversation.
You quickly downed the small orange pills in a single gulp and laid back on the couch, hiding your face is one of the pillows. You felt like shit, but at least Jae’s hands were large and warm on your back.
“Why don’t you take her back to the dorm?” Sungjin suggested, looking like he was in pain as well. “We can finish up here.”
“Alright.” Jae didn’t argue. He carefully loaded you onto his back and held onto your thighs tightly. You nuzzled your nose into his neck and tried not to cry out at every movement. He tried to walk as smoothly as possible, and thankfully by the time he placed you in his bed the painkillers had started to kick in.
“Jae…” You whimpered, tears stinging your eyes again.
“What’s wrong kitten?” he sat on the edge of the bed and gently ran his fingers through your hair.
“Hurts…”
“I know angel, but it’ll be over soon.” He let you curl into a ball, your head on his lap as he continued to card his fingers through your bangs.
You were so tired, and it hurt so badly. You let yourself sob, curling up tight when the pain hit and relaxing into Jae’s touch when it receded. Eventually, you were able to drift off to sleep, where the pain couldn’t follow.
The first thing you did when you woke up was groan and turn over, burying your face in the pillow and trying to go back to sleep. Jae’s scent surrounded you and you felt so safe that the last thing you wanted to do was actually wake up. When sleep didn’t come, you sighed and sat up. There were sounds coming from outside the room. You slipped from the warmth of Jae’s covers and put on one of Jae’s oversized hoodies that was laying on the floor.
Making your way out of the room, you saw everyone gathered in the kitchen.
“Morning princess!” Jae said with a smile. He handed you a cold water bottle and you thanked him with a kiss on the cheek. “Better?”
“Much.” You said with a smile.
“You sure? You really freaked us out…” Dowoon said with a frown.
“Yeah, sorry for worrying everyone,” You felt bad for making such a scene. “It came early so I wasn’t really ready for it. Normally I can take painkillers before the cramps hit so it’s not as bad but I was caught off guard.”
“Is it always that bad?” Younghyun asked.
“Yeah, unless I take something beforehand,” You answered easily, snickering a little at the looks of absolute horror on their faces. “You do realize that cramps are literally mini contractions, right? It’s basically fake-labor.”
“Jesus christ, no wonder you looked like you were going to pass out.” Wonpil looked pale.
“I’ve done that before.” You said, taking the bun out of Jae’s hand and taking a bite of it.
“You’re kidding…” Now Sungjin was pale.
“Back in high school, right?” Jae asked, taking his bun back. “I remember that. You were over my house and you just collapsed. I was about ten seconds away from calling 911 when you finally woke up.”
“That’s terrifying.” Younghyun looked faintly sick.
“You get used to it.” You laugh and Jae wrapped his arms around your waist.
“Glad you’re feeling better babe,” He kissed your neck as you leaned into his touch. “A nap always made it go away in the past.”
“Everyone’s seen me cry,” You pouted playfully. “Now they’re going to think I have a weakness.”
“Trust me love, you could beat any of them up without breaking a sweat,” Jae laced his fingers through yours. “That’s one reason why I love you so much. You can protect me from the scary fans.”
“You’re just a big baby.” You laughed as you tilted your head back to rest on his shoulder.
“But I’m your big baby.” He smiled at you so softly that your chest melted.
“You guys are so cute it’s gross.” Younghyun groaned, placing his forehead on the table.
“Hey, what do you normally need when this happens?” Sungjin asked, stopping you from snarking back at the bassist. “So we can have stuff in case you don’t for next time.”
“If you date one member of Day6, you date all of them apparently.” You giggled, touched that Sungjin would be so thoughtful.
“Hey! Hands off my girlfriend!” Jae playfully shielded you from his leader.
“As long as they play nice you can share.” You joked, causing Younghyun to choke on his own spit.
“Who said anything about playing nice?” he grinned at you and winked, causing you to blush.
“That’s it! We’re going to watch shit in my room,” Jae scowled, causing Younghyun to howl with laughter. “Don’t bother us.”
“Whatever.” The laughed as he pulled you away, but you could tell he was fighting back a smile of his own.
“You’re so frustrating!” You screamed, zipping your bag angrily. You tried to be calm, you really did, but Jae seemed to be pushing every single one of your buttons and you were fed up with it.
“How am I the frustrating one?” He snapped back, his neck and ears red. “You’re always so-”
“I’m always so what, Jae?” You asked, your voice going from firey to icy. You saw him hesitate before responding.
“You’re so controlling!” He finally said, throwing his hands in the air. You felt your chest tighten. “You want to be in charge of everything and everyone! You want everyone to be afraid of you and get mad when they aren’t! It’s so frustrating because I always talk about how sweet you are, then you act like a bitch to my friends!”
“I’m a bitch now?” You thought your world was crashing down around you. “I’m the bitch? You let your friends make self harm jokes, Jae! In front of me! And you /laughed/ at them!” The tears you were trying to hold back starting stinging your eyes more and more, almost like they were begging to be let out.
“Look, they were just joking. They would never have said it if they knew-”
“And that’s supposed to make it better?” You broke down, hot tears running down your red cheeks. “No Jae, you’re not supposed to make jokes about that no matter what! What if someone else was there? Someone who could have been really fucked up from that?”
“You’re making a big deal out of nothing.” Jae crossed his arms and you closed your mouth with a snap.
You knew, going into your relationship, that Jae was stubborn. Not only was he stubborn, but he didn’t have the best friends in LA. When he invited you to see his family again and spend some time in Cali, you jumped at the chance. It had been so long since you had seen his parents last, and he always talked about his friends.
Within fifteen minutes, you had told them off and stormed off to the bathroom. You could hear Jae calling after you, but you ignored him.
When you joined them, your eyes were no longer red from crying, but your wrist stung from the lines you managed to make with the sharp part of a button from your lanyard.
You didn’t let Jae know you were phased, but you made a point to let his friends know you weren’t taking any shit from them.
Needless to say, Jae was not pleased.
You made it back to his house in silence. When his parents asked what was wrong, you offered them a small smile while he just brushed past you. You followed and scolded him to ignoring his parents, causing the fight to start.
You grabbed your bag and spun on your heel.
“Where are you going?” He asked, some of the anger gone from his voice.
“Out.” You said curtly, not looking at him.
“But it’s late-”
“I’ll be fine.” You cut him off. As you reached for the door, he reached for you and grabbed your arm. You couldn’t help but yelp a little as his fingers wrapped around the still puffy lines on your arm.
“I’m sorry,” He instantly dropped your arm, confusion coloring his words. “Wait, did you get hurt? I didn’t grab you that hard-”
“I’ll be back.” You choked out. You could hear the understanding in his voice and you didn’t want to be comforted right then. You were still mad and you wanted to leave.
You bowed to his parents are you slipped your shoes on and headed off into the night. It wasn’t like Seoul, where the world never sleeps, but it was better than your hometown where everything closed at five. The streets were well lit and you easily retraced the path to the small coffee shop Jae always took you to.
The bell chimed as you opened the door. Since it was late, there were only a few people in the small shop, most of them workers. You ordered something simple and sat in the corner, where you could plug your phone in. You pulled up a familiar contact and hit call.
“Hey. What’s up? I thought you were with Jae’s parents.” Younghyun answered almost instantly.
“We had a fight.” You said, tears starting to fall again.
“What happened?” Younghyun instantly got serious. He knew how well you and Jae worked together, so news of you fighting was almost unheard of.
“I met his friends,” You stared, and you could see him cringe a little in the facetime call. “One of them made a joke about… made a joke about cutting and- and they all laughed… even Jae! I called him out on it, but Jae defended him. I went to the bathroom and cried and- well, when I went back, Jae wouldn’t look at me.”
“What else happened in the bathroom?” He noticed your hesitation and you felt your stomach drop.
“Nothing else.” You said as calmly as possible, but you answered a little too quickly.
“Please don’t lie to me.” he looked so sad.
“I tried to hurt myself…” The shame made your ears burn. “I was just so horrified that- that he was laughing at the joke! When we got back, we just started fighting. I said he was frustrating, and he said I act like a bitch to anyone who isn’t afraid of me… I’m not a bitch, right?” You sniffled, feeling vulnerable. The barista brought your drink over and you offered her a watery smile.
“Wait, Jae- THE Park Jaehyung - the same Jae that literally cried on stage when you surprised him at a show, called you a bitch?” Younghyun was floored. Sure, he knew his hyung could be a little bullheaded sometimes, but he had never thought Jae was capable of making you cry like this. The barista came back with some napkins and a danish from the cases. You tried to hand her money, but she shook her head with a smile. You thanked her quietly and turned back to your phone.
“He said I was controlling…” You felt like he had hit you with how much your chest hurt. “Am I controlling?”
“No, you’re thoughtful. Without you, that asshole wouldn’t remember his own head.”
“I just… after everything I can’t believe he defended his jerk friends when he KNOWS! He knows about how hard it is for me and he still laughed! He made me seem like a bitch to his friends because I’m finally learning to stand up for myself!”
“I’m proud of you angel,” Younghyun said softly. “I know how hard it’s been for you, and trust me. I’m going to have a serious talk with him.”
“I don’t want to cause any more fights,” You said instantly, taking a bite from the pastry. “If you say something to him, he’s going to know I talked to you and get more angry that I got other people involved…”
“You don’t deserve to be treated like this,” Younghyun pushed. “He was way out of line. I know his friends are important, but you have to know when your friends are being assholes and call them out for it.”
“Thanks for talking me through this oppa,” You said with a smile. He grinned at you, his eyes turning up. “You’re a lifesaver.”
“Don’t thank me yet, cupcake.” he said, his grin turning mischievous. You felt your stomach drop a little. He only pulled out the silly nicknames when he was up to something.
“Oh thank god, there you are.” A voice called from the front of the shop. You turned and saw Jae walking quickly towards you. You instinctually made room at the table for him before remembering you were still mad at him.
Our anger quickly evaporated when you saw the tear tracks on his cheeks.
“Kitten, I was so worried,” he pulled you into a tight hug. “Fuck, you ran out so fast and no one knew where you went… I’m so sorry. I never should have laughed, and I definitely shouldn’t have defended him. I just…I don’t know. I guess I slipped back into the sense of humor I had when Iived in LA and went with it.”
“It really fuckin hurt Jae,” You said, not ready to accept his apology. “You KNEW what that sort of thing does to me…”
“And I’ll never forgive myself.” he whispered and took your hand, turning your arm over and kissing your clothes wrist, where the cuts still stung when they rubbed against the fabric. You didn’t breathe for a second.
“I’m sorry for yelling at you.” You said finally, letting your fingers lace through his.
“Please don’t apologize,” he shook his head. “You have nothing to apologize for. This was all my fault.”
“In that case, I forgive you.” You smile softly and lean in, resting your forehead against his.
“Wanna go home? Mom and Dad are passed out for the night.” He said with a smirk and an eyebrow wiggle, causing you to giggle.
“I’m glad you two made up, but this is where I say goodbye,” Younghyun’s voice came from your phone. You squeaked and saw that he was indeed still on the call. “I don’t need to hear you two being cute. I get enough of that here.”
“Thanks Bri Bri,” Jae grinned with a faint blush. “Catch ya later.”
“Yeah, yeah, go make up.” he waved and grinned. Jae hung up and locked your phone before handing it to you.
“Wanna head back? It’s not too late to watch a movie or something.” He said, his voice suddenly much softer than before.
“That sounds nice.” You smiled, taking his hand. It fit perfectly in yours, as always.