Archive of Our Own

"Are we really getting a new place?" Madi asks Clarke, fixing her with a more intense look than Clarke thinks the question warrants.

"At some point, yeah. Why?"

"Because the Blakes are filming next season here and they're encouraging non-traditional families to apply, so if we really want a place, we should do that."

She says the words in a great rush, like she rehearsed them, and Clarke wishes she knew what Madi was actually saying, so she could appreciate it and react accordingly.

"The Blakes?"

Madi rolls her eyes. "The renovation show?"

Suddenly, everything makes a lot more sense. Madi is hooked on home-improvement shows, and while Clarke sometimes watches with her, she doesn't pay that much attention. She can't name most of them, even if she could recreate the entire plot from memory. "The married ones?"

"No, the siblings. You think they're cute?"

Most of the personalities are cute; they're on TV, that's how it works. But it is enough to get her all the way caught up. The Blakes, Octavia and Bellamy, work together to sell and renovate homes, being generally charming and photogenic as they deal with unexpected disasters. It's a charming enough show, even if Clarke only really pays attention to the way Bellamy's muscles flex under his shirt when he demolishes shit. It still counts as being a good parent, probably. She's participating.

"Okay, yeah, I've got it. Sorry. They're coming here?"

"Yeah, I saw a casting call on Twitter, it's legit," she says. "It's from the show's verified account and Octavia's verified account retweeted it."

Clarke is busy trying to remember what the Blakes do in their show. Octavia finds properties and Bellamy renovates them, although they're pretty much a team. They buy places cheap and gut them, ripping down walls and putting up new ones, adding fixtures and features. The transformations are always impressive, but Clarke can't help feeling the whole thing would just stress her out. There's always some disaster coming up, some secret lurking in the walls waiting to fuck everything up, some new budget disaster.

On the other hand, she hasn't been having much luck finding a good place for herself and Madi, and her condo does feel more and more cramped every day. They want to get a dog and have a yard and Clarke is in a ongoing passive aggressive fight with someone from the condo association. She would love to move.

And Madi's excited about this, which is really the most important thing. She and Clarke have been doing okay, but Clarke knows that Madi misses Lexa, and, more than that, that Lexa left her. She left Clarke too, of course, but she broke up with Clarke. The fact that she moved and lost all contact with Madi too, that stung. She was already too used to being abandoned.

"So they find us a shitty place, take it, and make it over into our dream home? That's how it works?"

"Yeah. There's a whole subreddit for people who have been on the show!" Madi adds. "Like they talk about how accurate their episodes were and what was added for drama and how much they actually got to keep and how the pricing broke down. It sounds like the show is pretty legit. It's not, like, all real, but they do the work and people get houses. It could be cool, right?"

"It could. You can send me the link to apply," she says. "And to the subreddit. I want to do some research too. But you know that even if I apply, it doesn't mean they'll cast us, right?"

"I know."

"Okay. I'll think about it."

Madi beams in a way that twists Clarke's heart up. It feels like Madi never lets herself want things, not like she should. It would be nice to give her this.

How bad could it be?

*

It takes Clarke two days to decide to send in the application. She reads the accounts Madi sends her from people who have been on the show, reviews what she's agreeing to by submitting the application, makes sure they're not getting into anything binding yet. They won't hear anything for a while, but the network gives them a list of things to do in the meantime, stuff Clarke should honestly be doing anyway like pinning down a budget and a list of what they're looking for. Clarke had vague ideas, but without any places tempting enough for her to put down an offer, she hadn't really nailed things down. Now, she looks at the money her father left her, the value of her current place, what her budget is, what her stretch budget is, what she and Madi want and need.

Madi, of course, is thrilled, although Clarke can tell she's trying to keep her expectations in check. They haven't been cast yet, but it is looking good. Clarke does a phone interview with a producer a month after they apply, which is mostly about her and Madi's story, and from there they set up a meeting for when the production actually comes to town. It's not getting cast, but it's definitely so far, so good.

"Do you think they'll be there?" Madi asks, bouncing in the back seat as Clarke drives them into the city for the meeting. "Or just some network people?"

"No idea," says Clarke. "I guess it depends if they're in town already. I don't think they have to approve us, though."

"I know. But if they're not there and we don't get cast, we won't get to meet them."

"They're going to be filming here either way," Clarke points out. "I bet they'll have some public appearances. Book signings or whatever. They must have a book, right?"

"Probably, yeah." She sighs. "I know it's not, like--they're not a huge deal. I'm not obsessed or anything. But if we're going to meet with people from the show, I wish it was them."

"I get that. They could still cast us," she adds. "I'm not saying we have to rule it out, just--"

"Not getting our hopes up."

"Exactly." At a red light, she glances over her shoulder, flashing Madi a smile and squeezing her knee. "We can still get a new place without them. We could even do a renovation, if you want. I know I've been dragging my feet on finding a house--"

"It's a lot," Madi says. At ten, she's on the brink of understanding how complicated these things are, but she doesn't really get it. Clarke is pretty sure the actual renovation process is going to be awful for her. On TV, the months of work are reduced to a few dramatic scenes and upsets, but Madi's going to have to live all that time between things actually happening.

At least they'll have plenty of time to pack.

The production has rented out some office space downtown, and the hallway is crowded with families who must be waiting for their own meetings. Some have come with hordes of children, others are just one or two people. All look fairly well off, which makes sense, given the show isn't offering them money, just giving them the option to pay for services they could get on their own, with a bonus fifteen minutes of fame.

If it is a total scam, at least she and Madi aren't the only ones who have fallen for it.

They meetings are running behind schedule because, according to the frazzled assistant at the check-in desk, the Blakes are around and that slows things down.

"You're not allowed to ask for autographs or pictures or anything," she says, sounding exhausted. "This is purely an informational meeting, you are not here as fans of the Blakes."

Right on cue, the door behind the desk opens and a family of three leaves, a woman with two children. Clarke sees Bellamy Blake--a shock in person even though she's not really a fan, taller and broader than she expected, with celebrity-white teeth and an unfamiliar pair of glasses crooked on his nose--behind them, offering a high-five to the smaller of the children, a girl with neat black pigtails being held in her adult's arms. She grants him the high five and he beams, bright and almost blinding.

Then the door is closing and he's gone again.

"We'll be appropriate," says Clarke, regaining control of her attention. He's cute, but he's just a guy. She hasn't even been that into guys lately. "Thanks."

They get seats fairly close to the door, letting them watch the people going in and out. The meetings were supposed to take about fifteen minutes, but most of them end up being closer to twenty. Bellamy seems to follow every group to the door, making sure they're all seen off with a smile and a wave and a nice word, so it's probably a case of the talent refusing to listen to the staff. If she was working for them, Clarke would be annoyed, but as a mother with a daughter who's looking for a celebrity encounter, she's grateful that Madi will at least get a conversation. The delay sucks, but the memory of his being kind will last.

The two of them play Scrabble on Clarke's phone until they're called in. Madi turns shy as soon as they're called, but that's no surprise. "I'm nervous too," Clarke murmurs. Adults just know how to hide it better.

Bellamy opens the door, so Clarke sees the room's other occupants first, an older man behind a desk and Octavia. Like her brother, Octavia Blake seems even more attractive in person, every feature sharper and more pronounced. Clarke assumes it's the shock of them; she expects to see celebrity-hot people on TV, not in front of her in nondescript office spaces. On TV, the Blakes are average, part of the landscape. In a mundane office, they feel superhuman.

"You must be Clarke and Madi," Bellamy says, closing the door behind them and favoring them with one of his smiles. He's got a little stubble coming in, another contrast to his clean-shaven TV persona, and freckles dotting his cheeks that the crew must cover for shooting. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too," says Clarke, offering her hand. Being a parent means being the person who can talk in front of the very hot celebrity, whether she wants to be that person or not. Madi can't be.

"I'm Bellamy, this is my sister, Octavia, and Marcus Kane, from the network. Have a seat."

"You know you don't have to be like this," Octavia says, but she's teasing. "You don't have to do introductions."

"It's called being polite," he shoots back. "I raised you better than this."

It's actually a little surreal, watching the two of them in person. The back-and-forth is familiar, a staple of the show, but she hadn't expected it to be any more real than anything else on reality TV. If someone told her they weren't even really siblings and that was just a network hook, she would have believed it.

Now, she wouldn't. There's just something about them.

"Please, sit," says the network guy, Marcus. He's around her mom's age, with gray streaking his hair and a pleasant smile. "It's a pleasure to meet you both. This shouldn't take long, we'll mostly ask you questions that you've already answered. It's more about getting to see how the two of you are in person."

"Sounds good," says Clarke. "Go ahead."

Marcus consults his notes. "When did you adopt Madi, Clarke?"

"I adopted her about nine months ago," says Clarke. "But I was fostering her for about a year and half before that."

"What made you decide to foster?"

Clarke shifts, uncomfortable with the topic as always. This is probably going to be a thing if she tells them, a part of her and Madi's backstory. It'll probably help get them on the show, if that's their main goal. "It was something my ex and I wanted to do. It didn't end up being a good fit for her, though."

"So she's no longer in the picture?"

"No. And I don't want her in the picture on the show."

Marcus smiles, a placid expression Clarke doesn't really trust. "Of course not. Do you have a girlfriend at the moment?"

"No," says Clarke, at the same time Madi says, "She's bi, she could have a boyfriend too."

"My apologies. No significant other?"

"Is this relevant?" Clarke asks, jaw tight. "What does it matter?"

"It's logistical," Bellamy puts in. "The network likes to vary client types. We don't want a season that's all married couples with a new baby who want to move into a larger place. He's trying to figure out if you're a single parent or there's another adult who would be involved."

"Single parent. If you want me to bring a friend along, I can, but it's just us."

"That's fine," says Marcus, making a note. "Like Bellamy said, this is purely logistical."

Clarke wets her lips. She could let it go, of course, but the last thing she wants is to be blindsided. If setting boundaries means they aren't on the show, then at least Madi got the chance to meet the Blakes. And Clarke can find a nice place on her own.

"I know that personal stories are a part of the show, I've seen it. But I don't want my ex to be a part of mine. I don't really want to talk about romance at all. Is that cool?"

"We won't put anything in that you don't give us," says Marcus, with a kind of smoothness so slick that Clarke can almost see the oil on the words.

"So if you ask me point-blank, it's fair game?"

"Give her a break, Marcus," Octavia points in. "We don't care about your romantic drama. You two live in a condo and want to move to a house, right? Just tell us what you're looking for, Bell and I aren't going to ask about your ex."

It's curt, but fairly reassuring. Octavia and Bellamy are the only ones on camera, and Clarke actually does believe that they won't give her any trouble. It's not the kind of drama the show tends to favor, but it's hard not to worry. She doesn't want to be one of their tragic cases; she just wants to make her daughter happy.

"We want a dog," Madi says, bright, slicing directly through the tension, and Clarke picks up the conversation with ease. It's mostly information they already gave, but with more personality; instead of just the cold hard facts of spaces and dimensions. By the end of the conversation, Clarke has almost forgotten the early weirdness. Marcus has bowed out of the conversation, and the Blake siblings have kind of a nice cop/surly cop vibe going that Clarke likes. It's not just like the show, but it feels more honest.

"I think that's all we need," Marcus says, gently interrupting before Madi can keep telling Bellamy about her school routine. "And we do have other meetings after this."

"Sorry," Bellamy says, mostly to Madi. "It was really nice to meet you guys." He offers Madi his hand, and then Clarke. His palm is dry and rough, but warm, and his smile is even warmer. "The network will be in touch." He turns his attention back to Madi. "Do you want a picture or anything?"

Octavia rolls her eyes. "You know, for someone who's always worried about holding up the crew, you never care about holding us up at these."

"You're just glad I'm the nice one so you can pretend you wouldn't feel bad about rushing people through." He smiles at Madi again. "Picture?"

They leave the meeting with a picture of Madi between Bellamy and Octavia, and a promise from Marcus that they'll hear from the network soon. Clarke's pretty sure that if they do hear anything, it's just going to be that they weren't picked, but it would be nice to actually hear that. And in the meantime, Madi is beaming. No matter what happens, this is going to be a good memory.

"That went okay," Clarke offers, as they walk back to the bus. "Right?"

Madi grins. "Perfect."

*

The call comes when Clarke is at work, and she doesn't actually pick up. Like any good millennial, she doesn't trust unknown numbers. But the person leaves a voicemail, and when she listens, it's Marcus Kane, calling to talk about their schedule for the show.

"Holy shit," Clarke breathes, and has to take a minute before she calls him back.

They want to move faster than she was expecting, with a camera crew asking to come to their condo in the next week to film their introductory material, and then a week after that they'll be going on their first house tour with the Blakes. She'd given her and Madi's availability, and everything falls within that window, but still. She had thought they'd have more time.

Mostly, she hadn't really thought they'd be picked at all.

Madi had more confidence. "They liked us."

"You think?"

"Bellamy always likes doing shows with kids, and I'm enough of a sob story all by myself. In a good way!" she adds, before Clarke has even started dissecting that. "Like, we don't need Lexa to be a feel-good story about an unconventional family finding a new home. We're fine on our own."

"It's not like I'm scarred," Clarke says, with a smile. "Honestly, I'm doing fine. But if we're on the show, Lexa's going to find out, and I don't want to open up old wounds. For anyone."

"I know. So it can just be about us, right?"

Clarke gives her a hug around the shoulders. "Yeah, that sounds nice."

She agrees to everything, gets Wells to take a look at the contract before she signs, but he says everything looks pretty normal and they aren't obligated to buy a property Octavia shows them or anything. If they don't find a place they can agree on within twelve weeks, they'll reassess.

It's enough to make her a little bit excited. She and Madi have been watching a lot of Blake It Up, getting ready for their own appearance, and Clarke has to admit, she's not as nervous as she thought she would be. The Blakes do good work, and she's looking forward to seeing what they come up with.

This could actually be fun.

The preliminary filming is on a Saturday, and the crew shows up bright and early. It's just three of them--a camera person, a sound person, and a producer, a gorgeous woman who introduces herself as Raven Reyes.

"So you're the bisexual single mom with the adopted pre-teen daughter, right?" she asks.

"Is that how you guys think of us?"

"No offense, but yeah. It's all about framing. We want to make your current place look as small as possible, and the kid--Madi, right?" Madi nods, and Raven does too. "Cool, you're going to need to talk about how you want more space to hang out with friends and--" She checks her notes. "You want a dog, right?"

"Yeah."

"Cool, talk about that. Clarke, you can talk about being a single parent, wanting to do right by your kid, needing more space, all that jazz. Got it?"

"We can't just talk about what we want?"

"Sorry, do you not need more space? Do you want to do wrong by your kid?"

"No, of course not." Her indignation melts, because it really is kind of ridiculous. "I guess I didn't know what to expect from the coaching."

"Basically what you see on TV, I figure you know the formula. Something bad happens, you get mad at Bellamy. He fixes it, we don't go into specifics of how your money is being spent on air, everything works out and you love your new place, whether you like it or not. We're going to want you to go through all those stages."

"That's cool," says Madi. "I can talk about all that stuff. I definitely want a dog."

"That's what I'm saying. You good?" Raven adds, leveling Clarke with a piercing stare. "I don't care what you say, just cover the talking points."

"I think I can do that."

"They really try to give you a place you'll like, don't worry. But if they don't, pretend like they did."

"Do you always lower expectations this early?"

Raven grins. "Always. Okay, this is Miller," she nodded to the guy with the camera, "and Monroe. We're going to want to get footage of you in every room, ideally showing off how cramped you are. Any pet peeves you've got, we want to hear them."

"And if we don't have enough, we should make some up?" Clarke asks.

"Trust me, you've got enough." She considers. "You guys have seen the show, right?"

"Yeah."

"So you know how it usually goes. They show you some place that feels absolutely perfect but you can't afford it, and then talk you into some other place."

"Really looking forward to that," Clarke says, dry.

Raven ignores her. "We're going to get most of the footage we use for your we need to move from that. We'll see what we get out of this, but seeing a new place with everything you want is going to make you notice all the stuff you hate about this one."

"This is the kind of behind-the-scenes secret you're going to find out from being on the show," Clarke says, and Madi grins.

"Yeah, it's going to be awesome."

It's a little unnerving how quickly Clarke gets used to having the cameras on her. Miller sets up a few tripods, but also follows them around with a handheld, getting some more candid footage. Madi, of course, takes to it like a duck to water, showing off her closet, which is way too small, and the bathroom, which is insufficient for both of them. It's all pretty much true, but it's surprising to Clarke how much she comes up with on her own too, even without the ideal property to compare to. She's always liked this condo, but if she's honest, she's never loved it.

"Okay," says Raven, with a satisfied nod. "It's always easy once you get started. Anything else to add today?"

Clarke and Madi exchange a look. "I think we're good," says Clarke.

"Cool." She hands over a business card. "This is my cell, put me in your contacts so I can get in touch. I'm your contact for as long as you're on the show, it's my job to deal with you. All those things we have on the show where the people call up Octavia out of nowhere with a house to look at or buy something for Bellamy to put in the house without telling him?" She waits until Clarke and Madi nod before continuing. "That's BS. You don't do a thing without running it by me. We don't have surprises from the clients on this show."

"Got it," says Clarke.

She smiles. "Okay, cool. Sorry to go all serious on you, but we try to make really clear right away that reality TV is, uh--not. Sorry for the bad news."

"Does that suck for really little kids?" Madi asks. "Like you're telling them Santa isn't real or something?"

"I usually take the parents aside if the kids are younger than you and tell them. They can figure out how to deal with it."

"Well, we'll definitely call you. I don't really want to do any big surprises."

"You say that now, but everyone's got an opinion once reno starts." She smiles. "We'll be back in touch in a couple days to set up your first meeting with the Blakes. If you have any questions, I'm not an asshole, just a control freak, so text any time."

Clarke smiles. "Honestly, I appreciate it. I'm a lot happier not thinking I'm supposed to be sneaking onto the construction site or anything."

"If there's a real surprise on a reality show, we find a way to sue," Raven says, grinning. "You're good. Talk to you soon?"

"Yeah."

They all shake hands, Miller and Monroe pack up their equipment, and Clarke sees them off at the door with a wave.

"She was cute," Madi observes, and Clarke rolls her eyes with a smile.

"Don't start."

*

"Hey, nice to see you again."

Bellamy Blake is, oddly, not as attractive when he's filming. The hair and make-up people are good at their jobs, and they definitely made Clarke look better, but for whatever reason, the network has decided that Bellamy's freckles need to be covered and his hair needs to be tidied up. He's attractive, of course, like he always has been, but compared to his casual appearance, the slicked up TV Bellamy just doesn't compare.

Clarke shakes his hand anyway. "Nice to see you too." She and Octavia exchange pleasantries, and then Raven and the crew, and then there's an awkward pause while they're doing setup. "Honestly," says Clarke, into the silence, "I figured they wouldn't bring the talent on until we were ready to film."

"We don't actually want the first time we see your place to be on camera," says Octavia, looking around. "We did that once and I made fun of this ugly bathroom that the family loved. I felt like such a--" Her eyes flick down to Madi. "Jerk."

"I know swear words," Madi says.

"Don't start listing what swears you know," says Clarke. "So we give you a tour?"

Bellamy nods. "We already saw some of the footage you recorded last week, so we know some of your problem areas. But I know it's different trashing your own place and having someone else do it. So we're going to do a quick walk-through, kind of a rehearsal, and then we'll film a few takes. It's pretty straightforward."

"I'll do most of the talking," Octavia says. "Bell's just here for snarky asides."

"Yeah, I get to relax until you've actually bought a place."

"How does that work?" Clarke asks, curious. "Do you guys get it expedited or what? All the logistics take a while."

Octavia sighs. "Bell's going to explain that, Madi and I are going to check out the fun stuff. You guys can talk about boring legal stuff."

Clarke has to smile. "Shouldn't she be the expert on boring legal stuff? She's the realtor."

"Is it going to scandalize you if I tell you this isn't either of our life's passions?"

Madi is showing Octavia the kitchen and seems thrilled to have all her attention, so Clarke figures she can watch with one eye and still talk to Bellamy. That's still being a good parent. "So how did you get started doing it?" she asks.

He shrugs. "O actually got a job on another home-improvement show doing construction stuff, and then they decided to spin her off. It was going to be her and someone they hired flipping houses, but I had a bunch of licenses from doing odd jobs and she figured it would be better if we worked together. More of a hook. But the network does a lot of the work for us." He glances at her. "I assume that's not news."

"Wait, celebrities don't do all their own work?" she asks, mock-surprised.

"We're not really celebrities."

"You're on a TV show named after you. If that's not a celebrity--"

He ducks his head, laughing a little. "Yeah, okay. But I don't get recognized everywhere I go or anything. I'm not, like, a star."

"Still."

"Still."

"So, how does it work? Legally speaking."

It's the kind of question she's probably supposed to ask Raven, but if Bellamy minds, there's no indication. "How much detail do you want?"

"How much do you have?"

He grins. "Okay, so, banks and lawyers."

They lose about fifteen minutes talking about the various ways the network greases palms to keep things running quickly and smoothly. It's kind of dizzying, but not actually any more dizzying than buying this condo was, and the stuff she saw online indicated everything was legit. It's maybe even a little easier for her personally, with the network taking on a lot of the work.

"Do you really do your own reno designs?" she asks.

"Yes and no. I do most of the structural stuff. How to open up spaces, rearrange fixtures? I'm good at that. But staging and design isn't my thing."

"So you're basically good at telling people to get rid of their walls and go open concept," she says without thinking, but luckily Bellamy snorts.

"I'm good at giving the people what they want, thanks."

"As long as what they want is open floor plans and giant kitchens."

"Is that not what you want?"

"I want Madi to be happy," she says, glancing over at her daughter. "And she loves your show. So if you give us the Blake special, I'll be good."

"Good, because that's about all we've got. People don't really sign up for the show to get surprised, they know what they're getting into."

"But I still have to pretend I'm not willing to renovate a home, right?"

He grins. "You really are a fan, huh?"

"Or I'm a really good parent."

The grin softens into a smile that makes her heart lurch. He's easy to talk to, surprisingly real, unsurprisingly handsome. She really needs to remember that he's also temporary, and the attraction should be ignored. She's not a kid, she knows better than to get all gooey over a celebrity.

"You seem to be, yeah."

"We ready to go, Bell?" Octavia asks, right on cue. "I need to know what not to make fun of."

"Ready?" he asks Clarke, head cocked.

"Ready," she agrees. "Don't make fun of the paintings."

His smile is still too soft. "No problem."

*

Being on Blake It Up feels a lot like watching it, except in slow motion. Their projected timeline is about six months, from finding a place to closing on a place to getting it renovated, but the beats of the show are the same. The Blakes take them to a gorgeous house that they could never afford, Clarke sees what she could have if she just spends the money on a fixer upper, and then the Blakes show them properties.

Like, a lot of properties.

"Is it bad if I thought you guys wouldn't actually show us the homes?"

"Not really," says Octavia, with a shrug. "Everyone thinks that. The network used to try to get around it, but it's actually easier to have us do it. We usually don't have a house picked out ahead of time, so you have to find a place, and we figured out it doesn't actually save us much time if you go with a producer first. If you liked it, we still had to come back and film the whole thing again, so yeah. We just do it."

Clarke appreciates it, because it is hard to fall in love with an ugly house in need of major renovation, but the Blakes are good at their jobs. Octavia--or the producers--knows a shocking amount about not only the various neighborhoods in the city, but school districts, traffic patterns, and commutes. And Bellamy knows how to sell his designs, can paint a much better word picture than Clarke was expecting. Most of all, they feel more honest in person. Octavia lays out pros and cons with clinical detachment, and Bellamy talks about what things he might not be able to do and what rooms he won't be touching, instead of glossing it over like he does on TV. Clarke feels both prepared and informed as she looks through the massive amounts of information she has.

If only it was enough to make her feel confident.

"You really don't have a favorite?" she asks Madi.

Madi shrugs. "I have two favorites. They're both good, so I'd go with the cheaper one, but--"

"Cheaper is complicated. The--" She makes a face. They give all the houses cutesy nicknames she's required to use on camera, but she's been stubbornly refusing to do it when she's not being filmed. "The red one is projected to cost less to buy, but it needs more reno. The gray one is priced higher but it needs less work. And, honestly, it's a house. This is one time when it makes no sense to pinch pennies."

"You know, you said you thought the people on the show didn't really have just two houses they couldn't pick between and it was just the producers telling them to do it for drama," Madi points out, all innocence.

Clarke glares at her. "Not helpful."

"Not helpful, just factual. You could call Raven. She probably loves when this happens."

That much is true. If Clarke doesn't call them to have a conversation about her decision, they might make her record one later anyway. Even if she never tells them she's struggling.

She might as well tell them and see if they'll help.

She texts Raven, and they get a time set up tomorrow so Clarke can visit both houses again. Madi will be in school and Raven doesn't mention either the Blakes or a camera crew, so Clarke figured it will just be the two of them. Which is fine, honestly. The more she gets to know Raven, the more she likes her, and she trusts that she'll be able to talk Clarke down.

But when the car shows up the next morning, not only is Raven not there, but Bellamy is.

"Hi," she says, wary. "Did I do something wrong?"

His eyebrows shook up. "Wrong?"

In retrospect, it's not really the most logical guess, but she's flustered. They aren't alone, but it's just the driver in the car with them, the closest she's ever come to alone with him. It's not what she expects from the Blake It Up experience, and that experience has been fairly predictable so far.

This one, she didn't see coming.

"I figured if anyone was going to be here in an official capacity, it would be Octavia."

"O's working on negotiations this morning." He shoots her a smile. "You don't see it on the show because it's painfully boring, but she does a ton of work getting deals on properties."

"I figured the network would do that."

"This is the part of the job O likes," he says with a shrug. "That's not actually for show. She's good at it. Honestly, it would cost the network a lot more to retain a different real estate agent to do the work and keep O on to just be the face. They could have just gotten a charismatic realtor."

"But it's worth it to keep you even though you can't do design?"

His glare is half-hearted, and it mostly makes Clarke feel like they're friends. Gentle ribbing is the foundation of her favorite friendships. "I do design fine. But you really just have one realtor doing all your stuff; I couldn't do everything I'm supposed to do on the show alone. Not for as many people as I do. We keep the team as small as we can, but I'd still need contractors and consultants."

"It takes a village?"

"Pretty much."

"So where's the rest of the village?"

"Do you need all of them? We've got some cameras on site, but I didn't think this would be that long a conversation."

"Probably not."

"You need to get talked into doing a reno?"

"Definitely not." She sighs. "Look, I definitely appreciate your vision? But I think it's making it harder."

"Yeah?"

"I'm buying a house planning to change most of the stuff in there. So it almost feels like it doesn't matter which house I'm buying. I know how much they're both going to change."

"Which is why we look at stuff like yard and neighborhood and school districts."

"I know. But they're both really nice."

"Do you like the neighborhood you're in now?"

"Yeah, but I don't love it. Either of the new places would be a little more residential, but still walking distance from restaurants and stuff. Close enough to public transportation, Madi can go to the same school--" She sighs. "Trust me, I've been trying for pro and con lists."

"We can show you more places, but it doesn't sound like that's the issue."

"No, I don't think more options will help. I really didn't have trouble narrowing it down to these two, but now it's just--I can't decide between them."

"Flip a coin," he says, and she boggles at him. "Seriously. If it doesn't matter--"

"It matters. I'm just--it feels like there's a right answer and I'm not coming up with it."

"There isn't. Look, you could definitely be happier in either of these places. That's the good news. If it were me, I'd go with the one that's been on market longer. You're less likely to end up in a bidding war and you can probably get a better price because they'll want to move it. But that's just if you really don't care."

Clarke pulls up her phone so she can look through her notes. "The red one's been on the market for a few months."

"Yeah, they probably want to move that. How long do you have?"

"Raven gave me a deadline of Wednesday at noon."

"I meant today. To look at the properties."

"I don't know, a couple hours. I work from home and my schedule is flexible, so I can make up the hours after. Why?"

"The two places aren't that far apart, we should just walk from the first one to the second. I like walking around the neighborhoods to get a feel for them."

"You don't have anything else to do today?" she asks, frowning.

"We haven't finalized any sales yet," he says. "I barely even need to be here."

"So what are you doing?"

"Mostly finding people to help with the renovations once they start. I don't bring a crew, we hire locals. That takes a while. Other than that? Relaxing. My job is pretty awesome. They pay me a lot and I have a lot of downtime."

The car stops in front of the house and Bellamy slides out, letting Clarke follow him. They're at the gray one, and Clarke doesn't feel any strong emotion when she sees it. It's a nice house, two stories with a small yard, and she thinks she and Madi could be happy here.

But she and Madi are already happy. The new place doesn't have to solve all their problems. Clarke just doesn't want to feel like she's wasting hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Bellamy seems to be thinking the same thing. "The good news is, you don't have a bad option. Either of these houses is going to turn out fine."

"Unless you find some disaster in one of them that isn't in the other."

"We build disasters into your budget. And, honestly, they're usually pretty predictable."

"Yeah?" She looks up at the house. "So, what do you predict going wrong with this house?"

It's a very different tour than the one she went on with Octavia, even though he was being realistic then too. There are cameras around, but it doesn't feel like something they're going to put in the episode. If nothing else, they tend to avoid having Bellamy call so many potential issues this early.

But it's a lot more helpful to Clarke than the imagine how nice your open-concept kitchen will look tour. Bellamy shows marks on the wall that he thinks might indicate larger problems, guesses what the electrical might look like in a house this age, speculates on what walls might be more load-bearing than he wants.

"We always build some contingency into the estimate," he explains, as he frowns at a column in the basement. "Unexpected costs threatening the budget are great for drama on the show, but the last thing we want is to lowball an estimate and leave you without a house."

"What happens if there really is a huge problem that you didn't see coming?"

"Hasn't happened yet, but you could be the first person to find out."

"I can't believe you're actually good at this," she admits, and he snorts.

"Yeah, I get that a lot."

"No offense."

"None taken. It's a pretty great gig, I owe Octavia for getting me in on it."

"So you like it?"

"It's fucking surreal," he says, and then, to prove his point, glances around to see if there are any cameras that will necessitate his doing a clean take. When they're aren't, he shoots her a sheepish smile. "It's reality because it doesn't have a script, not because it's real. So I have to be an actor and a contractor and a designer, and I'm either really fucking busy or basically doing nothing. It's so weird."

"Do you do this a lot?"

"What, break down my estimates in painstaking detail?"

"Extra tours."

"When I have time." He shrugs. "Doing this, you get to know the different types of people buying homes. This seemed like something that would help you, so I figured I could do it."

She has to smile. "What type am I, exactly?"

"For one thing, I'm pretty sure Madi was the one who wanted to be on the show, not you."

"Definitely."

"So you're worried about making her happy, ending up with a good place, and keeping the stress low. But you don't seem great at low-stress either."

"Not great."

"So I'm telling you everything that can go wrong, and hopefully that helps."

"It does, yeah. I appreciate it."

"No problem." He pushes the basement door open. "Next property?"

"Yeah."

On the walk over, they talk about non-house stuff. Bellamy asks about her job and her cash flow, which always makes her feel a little weird. Clarke is good with money, and she might be in a position to buy a new place even if her mom wasn't helping her out. But she's also aware that the help her family has given her is so much more than just this money for this place; her whole life, she hasn't had to worry about money, and it makes her stomach twist uselessly.

Bellamy doesn't seem particularly surprised, though.

"It's an expensive area, most people here have some help from their families. Most people everywhere have help from their families," he adds. "We're the generation that's killing the housing market. The show would have tanked if owning a nice house wasn't a total fantasy for some people."

"Ouch."

He shoots her a crooked smile. "Yeah, it's not my favorite thing to think about. At least we're careful about getting cheap houses in expensive neighborhoods, so we're not going in and gentrifying. Or fleecing people who can't afford it."

"Ethical house-flipping."

He shrugs. "There's no ethical consumption under capitalism, I'm not going to say I'm doing good in any kind of global sense. But after another year or so, I'll be set for life, and I can quit the job and do something better."

For a second, she just stares, but then she starts laughing, can't help it. "I can't believe I just heard an HGTV host say there's no ethical consumption under capitalism."

"I can't believe I'm an HGTV host, so we're even." He shrugs. "It could be worse. But it's definitely not what I wanted to be when I grew up."

"Which was?"

That stops him short, and he has to think about it. "I guess I mostly wanted to have enough money to take care of myself and my sister, so this is actually better. Let O take care of me for a change."

"Or you take care of each other."

"Something like that." He stops, and Clarke realizes, abruptly, that they're already at the gray house. They visited them on different days, so she hadn't even realized how close together they were. She knew they were almost in the same neighborhood, but actually making the walk drives it home.

Which doesn't really help, honestly. She could use more differences, not fewer.

"Want to hear about this one?" Bellamy asks, pulling her attention back to the place.

It is nice, she has to say. Nicer than she remembered.

She gives Bellamy a smile. "Yeah, let's check it out."

*

Me: I'm watching your show
It's weird

Bellamy: Thanks
That's the kind of feedback I crave

After he showed her the two houses again, Bellamy gave Clarke his cell because he was "available for questions whenever." When she told him that Raven said she wasn't supposed to contact him or Octavia directly, he confirmed her earlier suspicions that half of his job was pretty much giving production crew a headache.

"If there's anything important, we'll let her put it on TV," he explained, looking only a little sheepish. "But if it's just a quick question, you don't have to bother Raven."

Given it seems to be Raven's actual job to keep people from bothering Bellamy, Clarke has trouble taking him seriously, and her compromise is to just text him with unimportant, irrelevant stuff. Her assumption had been that he'd just ignore it, but it turns out he's a fairly enthusiastic mundane texter, happy to respond to whatever she sends.

Which is not great, honestly.

Me: It's weird seeing you on TV tbh
I know it's not real, but you act a lot more on camera

Bellamy: Yeah
People have expectations
It's a lot like working in customer service
Put on a good front

Me: Save the surliness for when the cameras aren't running?

Bellamy: Or when they're not there

Me Or people like me who appreciate it?

As soon as she's sent the message, she feels like kind of an idiot. On the screen, Bellamy is explaining an "unforeseen" issue to the couple whose house he's renovating, and it really does feel different from how he talks to her. But he probably just has a few different off-screen personas, depending on what kinds of clients he's dealing with. She's the type who responds well to his cute, self-deprecating, straight-forward act. It's not complicated.

Bellamy: Yeah, it's going to be tough getting back in character when we're doing the renovations
Did they tell you we've got a start date?

Me: That's why Madi's watching the show
She's trying to prepare herself
She doesn't want to be one of the annoying kids who's trying too hard

Bellamy: She should just relax and be herself

Me: Unlike you

Bellamy: Well, I assume when she relaxes and is herself she's not a sarcastic dick
Or if she is it's cute
And she doesn't talk shit about capitalism

Me: We're working on it
I'm building up her hatred of injustice
And then I'll tell her it's capitalism's fault

Bellamy: Solid plan
What about you?
Nervous about how you'll come across on TV?

Me: You've already filmed me looking at houses
This isn't going to be any worse

It's something she wants to believe, but there's a stress sitting between her eyebrows that she can't shake. She doesn't think she's going to come across badly, but she does worry she's going to come across as kind of, well--pathetic. Because she's been texting Bellamy, but not seeing him, and she's not sure how it's going to be when she does see him. As stupid as it is, she's kind of developing a crush, and the last thing she wants is to be is the pathetic single mom obviously crushing on the cute contractor.

He's just really cute. It's not particularly fair.

Ideally, her focus will be on the house, and she won't have time to think about Bellamy himself, but the odds seem low. He's going to be wearing one of his stupid tight shirts and taking down walls and basically her only hope is that either his TV persona will be way less attractive or she'll be a much better actress than she thinks she is.

When they get to the house for filming, they see Raven first, as usual, and she runs them through what's going to be happening while they get made up. It's the standard stuff that they usually see on the show, the two of them helping out with some basic work, but Raven is strict about safety, what they're allowed to take down and what they're not, how much they're allowed to contribute.

"What if we want to take down more walls?" Madi asks. She's been really excited about demo.

"Bellamy's a softie, so he'll let you," says Raven, with a roll of her eyes. "Just don't do anything without either him or me okaying it. If you guys really want to be involved, we can make it happen. Most people realize it's not that fun, but hey, maybe you're into destroying stuff."

"Isn't everyone?" Madi asks, and Raven grins back.

"Good point. Have fun."

As expected, Bellamy is in the kitchen, wearing a black t-shirt and jeans, with a flannel shirt tied around his waist. He grins when he sees them, expression lighting up his whole face, and Clarke's stupid heart flips.

"Hey Clarke, hey Madi. You two ready to work?"

"I want to rip out the cabinets," Madi says. "I've been trying to decide what I want to do, and that one looks coolest."

"Really?" Clarke asks. "I want to kick down a wall, like I'm in an action movie."

"I think we can do both of those. But cabinets are a good place to start." He glances at Clarke, eyes dark and serious. "Any safety concerns?"

"You're a professional, right? I trust you."

His face softens at once, the warm smile making her melt, but luckily he doesn't look at her for long. Not that his turning attention to Madi is much better; being a parent means that people being good with her kids is actually better than them being good with her sometimes, and Bellamy is crouching down, explaining to Madi what she's going to do, how to be safe, and how cool it's going to look. Once they're done talking, he offers her a high five, which she gives him, and then the two of them work together to pop the counter off like they're uncapping a bottle. Once that's done, Bellamy helps guide the child-sized sledgehammer into the cabinet door, and after a few passes, he steps back and lets her go at it.

"She's got a knack," he tells Clarke.

"Thanks, I think. I don't really want to encourage her to rip my stuff apart."

"That's what you're doing, though. This is your house and your stuff."

It's a staggering thought. "It still doesn't feel that way."

"It probably won't for a while."

"What does your house look like?"

It's an odd question, but she doesn't realize it until he's cocking his head at her, a curious frown on his face. "Why?"

"Curious, I guess. Did you do your own reno? Do you have a giant open concept kitchen and double vanities and thirty spaces to entertain?"

He laughs. "I did some work, but not that, yeah."

"Not which part, exactly?"

"I'm not big on entertaining. I like to cook, so I've got a nice kitchen, but my living room is pretty minimal." He pauses, glances at the camera. "We're not using any of this audio," he tells Miller, and Miller rolls his eyes.

"Someday some paparazzi are going to get pics of you being a giant nerd and ruin your whole career. He's got a whole basement lair where we play Dungeons and Dragons," he adds, to Clarke. "That was what you were going to tell her, right? You're owning that."

"It's not just for Dungeons and Dragons," Bellamy grumbles. "But yeah, I definitely have a fully furnished basement lair. I go for more minimalism than we have on the show, though. They always want a lot of stuff to make it look ready to live in, and I don't need a billion pillows and decorative vases or whatever."

"Why are you trying to hide that you're a giant nerd?" It's maybe not the most pressing question to ask, but it's the one she's most curious about.

"He doesn't want to lose his sex appeal," says Miller, and Bellamy glares at him.

"Fuck you, my sex appeal is invincible. Sorry," he adds, glancing at Madi.

"She's not listening. And she knows the word fuck, she's ten."

"And that means we can't use the audio," Miller adds.

"True." He crosses his arms, sighs. "I guess it comes back to acting. I don't want people to know everything about me. Or even very much about me."

"You don't want people to know about Dungeons and Dragons," Miller supplies.

"Dude, you're in the game. Your boyfriend is the DM. You don't have any moral high ground here."

With one final jab, Madi takes out the last support for the cabinets, and the whole thing falls apart. She turns to look at them, face alight with pride, and Clarke and Bellamy move at the same time, both congratulating her and telling her she did a great job, a united front that churns in the pit of her stomach.

He's always good with kids; that's his thing. She and Madi aren't special.

"Okay," he says, straightening, smiling at Clarke over his shoulder. She misses his freckles. "You ready to get started?"

It's easy to smile back. She'll get over it. "Show me where to hit."

*

"I need to know how much we're actually allowed to be involved in the renovations."

It's been a week since reno started, and Madi has wanted to stop by the property every day. She wants to stop by after school, check in on the weekends, pick furniture and paint colors and window treatments. If Clarke let her, Madi would do her homework there, and probably sit on the dirty floor surfing the internet on the floor.

Clarke doesn't want to go that far, but if Madi wants to help, she doesn't see much reason to stop her.

Bellamy and Raven exchange a look. "How involved do you want to be?" Raven asks.

"I'm pretty sure if Madi could rip the whole house down, she would." She shrugs. "She's a big fan of the show, she knows that it's cheaper if we help, she wants to help as much as we can. I don't care about air time or anything," she adds. "You don't have to film it. I don't think she even cares if Bellamy is here."

Her intention had been to assure them that Madi wasn't just looking for more celebrity time, but without the context of her thoughts, Clarke can't help thinking it's a weird statement. No one's even told her Bellamy isn't on site most of the time, she just sort of assumed. He's got a lot of houses to work.

"We're not doing any filming for the rest of the week, unless something goes wrong," Bellamy says. He taps his jaw. "Am I a problem?"

"A problem?"

"Does she not want to hang out with me?"

"She likes you."

"It's easiest if I'm around when clients are. I'm the one you know. Does she like demo or just the house?"

"Both."

He glances at Raven, who rolls her eyes. "You can do what you want," she says. "It's your life."

Clarke frowns. "I think I missed something."

Bellamy rubs the back of his neck. "You guys can text any time you want to come work on stuff. I won't always be here, but I'm usually on-site somewhere. You're welcome to hang out any time."

"We're not going to be in the way?" she asks. "Seriously, the last thing we want to do is bother you. I know amateurs helping out doesn't always actually help."

"Does Madi really want to do much, or does she want to be around?"

It's a good question. "I think she wants to learn. And I know that takes up a lot of time."

"If she just wants to listen, that's fine. And there's stuff she can definitely help with. Mostly it's just if you think she'll listen when I tell her what to do."

"I think so. And I'll be there."

"You will?"

He sounds surprised, which makes no sense. "Did you really think I was going to leave my ten-year-old unsupervised at an active construction site?"

"I guess not." His self-deprecating smile flashes out, like a reflex. "Not all parents are as neglectful as my mom was. But yeah, if you're there and you can watch her, it's fine. The only rule is you can't see the end stages of your place. So if you want to hang out while we're putting finishing touches on other properties, that's cool, but yours needs to be a surprise."

"I think we can handle that." She worries her lip, glancing over at Raven. She'd thought about just asking Raven without involving Bellamy, sure that Raven would say no and Bellamy would say yes, but Madi would bring it up to Bellamy next time she saw him, and then he'd be hurt Clarke hadn't asked him.

Besides, she still wanted him to say yes. She just wants to be sure.

"If it's going to be a pain, I can just tell her no," she assures him. "This is your job, you don't have to--"

His smile is warm. "Come any time. Just text me and I'll let you know where I am. Or you can come now."

"Madi's at school," she points out.

"Yeah, but you can see all the properties, make sure you're good with her coming to all of them."

On the one hand, Clarke can't imagine there's anything in any of the sites that Madi isn't allowed to interact with, but on the other hand, she hasn't seen much of Bellamy lately, and she still likes Bellamy, and if he wants to take the afternoon driving her around so she can look at all the places he's working on, she won't mind.

"I could come now," she says, and he smiles.

They're in Bellamy's actual car this time, a new pickup with some material he needs to drop off at one of the sites. Clarke doesn't actually know a ton about the actual renovation process, so they spend most of the drive over to the first house talking about that. In theory, Bellamy is working all the renovations at the same time, but in practice, none of the properties ever close at the same time, and there's no real advantage to his waiting to work on quick-closing properties until the slower ones are done.

"Not that we have to stick around for a lot of the reno," he says, glancing over his shoulder as he switches lanes. He must not be filming today, because he's wearing his glasses and no makeup, with a day or two of stubble on his chin. "If we had another location to film this season, we would be going between the two of them in a couple weeks. As it is, O's just basically done for the season. She'll be in LA and just come back to film the reveals when they come."

"That doesn't bother you? That you're working and she's not?"

"It pretty much evens out. She has more to do at the start of the season, before anything's actually sold, and I get to stay home while she does negotiations. It's unpredictable for both of us. And I like working."

"So how long do you think you're going to be here? How are the other houses going?"

"The last one just got their offer accepted and moved onto P&S. So probably--" He drums his fingers on the steering wheel. "Another three and a half months. Give or take."

Clarke and Madi's place will be done in five weeks, which felt like a long time when she was worried about having to deal with Madi's anticipation for the whole thing to be finished, but feels like no time at all to be spending with Bellamy. Five weeks is nothing, and even if he lets them keep visiting him on new sites, it's still--

It's still nothing. Bellamy is going to leave down and she's never going to see him again. Nothing was ever going to happen. Five weeks of nothing happening between them or three months of nothing happening between them both have the same ending: nothing.

But she can at least enjoy herself.

"And then you get a break?"

"Yeah, for a couple months. We're kind of always filming, but we also have a lot of downtime."

"But you still want to quit soon?"

"Honestly? It's getting boring. And I'm going to be rich enough that I can afford to quit a job that I don't like."

"Any idea what else you want to do?"

"Go back to school," he says, prompt. "Which would definitely be weird, but anything I do after this would be weird."

"How far did you get in school?"

"GED, trade school. I wanted to keep going, but I needed money more."

"What do you want to study?"

"Classics. I used to love them when I was a kid, that's why I gave O her name. I always wanted to learn Ancient Greek, but I never found the time."

"You really are a nerd, huh?"

"Or I'm a well-rounded person with a lot of interests."

"Keep telling yourself." She smiles. "So, how's our place going? Madi thinks you need to find a major problem soon."

"Yeah, your episode is fairly low drama." He pauses, mulling something over. "The producers want to make it about how you and Madi are too involved, instead of a major unexpected disaster. It would make sense with all the footage we have of you guys, but I wasn't sure you or Madi would appreciate that."

"I guess it depends on the edit. All my friends know I'm kind of a control freak already. But if they want to make Madi look like she's getting in the way--"

"No, of course not. We never want to edit kids to make them look bad. Any kid you thought was annoying on the show was ten times worse in person. Not that Madi's--" He rubs his face. "She's great."

"She is. So, your edit would be around me?"

"It could be. If you're hanging out anyway, we could get footage of you arguing with me about stuff. As long as you don't mind."

"Honestly? That could be fun."

He grins. "Yeah, I thought so too."

*

And it really is fun, getting more involved. Madi is following Bellamy around like a duckling, learning the basics of tearing things down and putting them back together, while Clarke brings her laptop and hangs out wherever is clean and safe, turning on her phone's wifi hotspot when she needs to be online. She's always been good at working in odd places, and the sounds of reno are actually kind of soothing, to say nothing of the fact that someone is caring for and helping her daughter.

A lot of people, actually. Madi's popular with not only the crew, but all of Bellamy's contractors, all of them delighted with having an enthusiastic protege.

Bellamy leans back against the wall next to Clarke as Madi works, closing his eyes. He was in LA over the weekend and took the red eye back in; he seems exhausted, but he still insisted on stopping by. "You could probably find a club for her for this. Not reno, obviously, but crafts and stuff. Shop class. Something."

"Yeah." She bumps his shoulder. "Hey, can you build a workshop into the new place?"

"Can you give me more money for it?"

"How much more?"

His face scrunches up, but he doesn't open his eyes. "Depends on where we do it and what you want. The basement is already finished and we're not really doing much in there, other than laundry. I could get you an estimate for throwing up a couple walls and some workbenches. Probably around $10k."

It's a lot of money, but she's reminding herself that all of the house stuff is an investment. An all-purpose room in the basement will add value if and when Clarke sells, and even if she doesn't, it's not a lot of money in the grand scheme of the house. Given how much she's paying, another ten thousand really isn't much.

"I might be able to get a deal on some materials too," Bellamy muses. "I'd say fifteen just to be completely safe, but I'd expect to get in under that. Raven and I can run the numbers and then we film the request. If you want."

"You guys do love surprise projects."

"Anything to eat up some air time." He straightens up, smiling. "That reminds me, what are you doing tomorrow?"

"Helping you eat up air time?"

"I need to pick tiles, you want to come along and help?"

"What does that look like?"

"We film the whole time. If we get into an organic disagreement, it's good, but if we both like the same stuff, we pick some other options and pretend to have a fight."

"So if I just have amazing design instincts, that's not enough of a story?"

"It might be. That's why we film the whole thing, just to be safe."

It's like a little shock of electricity, remembering that she doesn't actually know what the episode is going to look like. If she really is picky and over-invested, she can live with that, but she doesn't really know how much footage they have to support that story arc. And she has no idea how much footage they might want to use like this, of her and Bellamy sitting next to each other, close and easy, in their own world. Single parent flirting with one of the stars isn't a story they've told before, not something the show has ever seemed interested in, but Marcus told her they wouldn't use anything she didn't give them, which makes what she does give them fair game. And she really has no idea how unique this is, in the grand scheme of things. Maybe someone always decides they're pals with Bellamy or Octavia; maybe this is normal for them and she's just another in a long line of clients who thinks she clicked with a star who's mostly acting, who doesn't actually care.

Maybe she doesn't even need to worry.

"Do you think we're going to be a good episode?" she finally asks Bellamy.

"Honestly? I think all our episodes are pretty boring. The show's not really my thing."

"Not enough Ancient Greek," she says, and he snorts.

"Yeah, that's exactly it."

*

"How much of a headache am I for you?"

Raven's eyes flick to Clarke, and she looks her up and down, as if she's eyeballing Clarke's exact size before she answers. "My whole life is a headache."

"So is that like a five?"

She huffs. "I don't know what scale you're using. Maybe ask me a real question that I can answer."

"I feel like we're a huge pain for you."

"Huh."

"You told me I should never do anything without asking you first, and Bellamy is telling me to come help him pick out tiles while I'm hanging out with him at someone else's house."

"Most of my job is making sure clients don't make him and Octavia miserable, so as long he's happy, I don't have to care." She shrugs. "Makes my life a little easier, honestly. I'm here to keep people from bothering him. If he's bothering you, I don't have to give a fuck."

"Thanks, I think."

"You like doing this stuff, right?" she asks, picking up a tile to inspect. Bellamy is wrapping up some demo at one of the other sites before he and Clarke make design choices, and it's only a little awkward, waiting around for him. "You're having fun."

"Yeah."

"And you're getting the personalized experience, so that's cool. He doesn't do this for everyone."

"No?" Clarke asks, trying not to sound too curious.

Judging from Raven's expression, it doesn't work. "If you want to gossip, try Octavia. She loves making fun of her brother. I'm not getting involved."

"Just asking," says Clarke, hiding a smile. "So, tiles."

To her surprise, Raven actually does have opinions on tiles, and good ones, so the two of them have a few good options picked out by the time Bellamy shows up, all sheepish smile and apologies. His makeup looks like it was recent touch-up, and his hair is messier than Clarke thinks it usually is on TV. It looks a little like he came from a quickie, which is theoretically possible, and nothing worth actually dwelling on. Bellamy never talks about sex or relationships, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have them.

"We went over," he says. "There was an actual issue with the water and the couple needed me to talk them through it."

Raven shrugs. "It's cool, we came up with good ideas you can steal."

"Awesome, I should run late more often."

"I'll murder you," says Raven, without missing a beat, and he grins.

"You always say that." His expression softens as he turns to Clarke. "How's it going? Find anything good?"

By all appearances, Bellamy is impressed with Clarke and Raven's choices, but obviously they can't let it go at that. Bellamy picks a few Clarke likes too, and they select a couple truly hideous ones that Clarke is willing to defend, so they film takes. It's a little annoying, having Bellamy explain to her why choices she didn't make are bad choices, but the way his lip is twitching like he's about to burst out laughing at the sheer absurdity of the situation goes a long way to making her feel better. They're going to come across as friendly with each other, like they're having a good time. And he does make sure to give himself some shitty tiles that she can veto, too, so it's not just her with bad taste.

"While I've got you, can we also talk about Madi's workshop?" he asks.

"Here?"

"No, we need to go back to the site. You've seen people bring up surprise projects before, right? There's a formula."

"I thought maybe you wanted to try something organic. You know, a conversation like normal humans have."

"I thought you watched the show," he teases. "We can film a take here, see how it goes. But we have to do one on site too, so if you're in a hurry--"

"I have time to have a couple fake conversations with you, don't worry. Did you get a final cost estimate for me?"

He walks her through what he's going to do and how much it's going to cost, and then they have pretty much the exact same conversation on camera, making it out like Clarke just noticed something that made her think of the workshop idea. They talk through it, she pretends she's not sure about the price, Bellamy says things cost money, and they finally agree that Madi is worth it, which is a nice place to leave it. Clarke likes saying nice things about her daughter on TV, especially when her daughter isn't around to hear.

"It gets to really be a surprise, right?" she asks.

"As much of one as you want it to be," says Raven. "Your call."

"Madi's call too," Bellamy says. "Sometimes the genuine surprise reaction is a little too embarrassing. Especially for kids."

"Doesn't that make good TV?"

"We're successful enough we can do a second take that Madi doesn't hate, if she wants one." He shrugs. "The drama is the building, or should be. We try not to give anyone too much of an asshole edit, if we can avoid it."

"But I still have to come off a little annoying and stubborn."

"You agreed to it," he shoots back. "If you want us to come up with another edit--"

"I still really want to see the mild asshole edit."

Bellamy grins. "Cool. Let's go work on that."

*

Hands down the best part of getting a new place with the Blakes is that they help with the moving process.

Obviously, Clarke and Madi are still responsible for plenty of their own packing, but a week before the renovations are set to be done, Bellamy starts sending people over to grab furniture they want to keep, and he takes knick-knacks as quickly as Clarke and Madi can pack them up. It's surreal, watching all of their stuff slowly migrate, especially when they're now officially banned from the new place until the big reveal.

"What if we hate what you did to the new place?" Clarke asks as Bellamy inspects their living room furniture.

"You never tell me, you'll hurt my feelings."

"Obviously. But can I tell Octavia and Raven? Will people come and help us get rid of the stuff you bought if we don't like it?"

"It's like you didn't even read your contract."

"It's been months."

"How much do you like this couch?" he asks, picking up a cushion to look under it. Clarke doesn't know if he was hoping to find crumbs and loose Lego pieces, but that's what he gets.

"A normal amount, I guess? It's fine, getting kind of old. If you want to get us a new couch, I don't mind."

He flops down, sprawling out like he's trying to take up the maximum space. He's not a particularly tall guy, but with all his limbs stretched out, he feels like he dominates the entire room.

"Yeah, there's no way you're keeping this thing," he says. "It doesn't look good enough to go on TV. But do you like this style? Is it comfortable? Good size? Do you want a big sectional or more separate seating?"

After a second of hesitation, Clarke sits down, leaving a cushion between them for his sprawl, and then crosses the gap, to see how a smaller couch would feel. "Am I allowed to say we don't need a ton of entertaining space? Madi has a couple close friends but she doesn't really like having big parties. I feel like everyone on your show wants to host thirty-person galas."

"They want to have the option.What about you?"

"I don't need the option. I think a three-seat couch and an armchair or two would be good. Madi likes to have options."

Bellamy nods. "Everything with the same upholstery, or just complementary pieces?"

She has to think about that one. "Complementary, maybe? Or just use your best judgement."

"And then you tell me it sucks?"

"I'm not actually expecting you to do a bad job. I just have trouble not knowing what's happening."

"Yeah, that doesn't sound fun for you. I think you're going to like it," he adds, almost shyly. "It's looking pretty great. And it's really fun for me."

"It is?"

He shifts a little, reminding Clarke how close he is. He's not dressed for TV, no makeup, no contacts, and no one else is around, not even a single camera. This is the part they pretend they don't do, so they don't need footage.

She and Bellamy have never been this alone. How did she not realize sooner?

"A lot of the time, it's just the same stuff. Not in a bad way, but we've got a house style that people know. It's a self-fulfilling prophesy, we get the kind of jobs we're known for doing."

"So you're not giving me an open-concept kitchen and a giant en-suite master bathroom with double vanities?"

"Obviously. But I, uh--I got to know you, I think. It feels like I have a better handle on what you and Madi like."

"I think you probably do, yeah." She smiles. "I'm really looking forward to seeing it."

"I'm really looking forward to you giving me off-the-record feedback on what I did wrong. I know it won't be perfect," he adds, before she can say anything. "We can move furniture for you and stuff like that. But I want to know how I did first."

"Are you always like this?"

As soon as the words are out, she feels silly, exposed. It's a valid question, but she doesn't want to be the kind of person who asks.

"No," Bellamy says, without hesitation. "Definitely not."

"I'm glad I can be exciting."

"Me too." He stretches his legs out, wiggling his toes. "Don't you have anything to put your feet on?"

"I usually just lie on the couch," she says.

"And you don't have guests who want to put their feet up?"

"If you want to get yourself an ottoman, knock yourself out."

That does make him raise his eyebrows, but Clarke was prepared for it this time. They've got a week, he likes her, and there aren't any cameras around. Now's a good time to make it clear that she likes him too.

"I could definitely use an ottoman," he says, settling in more comfortably. "Where's the remote?"

Clarke smiles and hands it over.

*

Clarke isn't good at flirting at the best of times, and flirting with Bellamy Blake is basically the worst possible time. For one thing, they're on camera the vast majority of the time they're together, and even if a good chance to flirt arises, she doesn't want to take it. And every time she convinces herself he really does like her, in the romantic way, someone will mention another project of his, something else he's doing, and she'll tell herself she's reading into it, that he doesn't do all this for everyone, but the extra mile he's going to for her is just friendly interest. They get along; it's nothing deeper than that.

She still spends the next week of not seeing him texting him basically non-stop, sending pictures of her largely empty condo and he sends pictures of other places he's working on. Madi goes along with him sometimes, but Clarke resists the urge. Now that she knows Bellamy better, she feels comfortable leaving the two of them unsupervised, and if Madi shows up in another episode somehow, it's cute; if Clarke is always around, it's going to be suspicious.

Apparently it's already suspicious, because two days before their reveal, Madi calls her out. "Do you have a thing for Bellamy?"

"What?"

"Like, do you like him? It kind of feels like you like him. He's always texting you."

"That sounds like he likes me."

Madi huffs. "Yeah, I know. But you're texting him back. Wells always says you're like the worst texter in the world."

"Wells is overly negative."

"Yeah, that's Wells. Soooo negative. I know you think Bellamy is hot, you've told me that," she adds, which is fair. "That was how I talked you into doing the show."

"Yeah, but I also think he's going to be out of our lives in a couple days. It's nothing big," she tells Madi. "It's fun while it lasts, talking to a celebrity. But our place will be done and it'll be over."

"You'll still have his number."

Clarke pauses, powering past the kneejerk defensiveness and denial. If this was Wells asking her, she would blow it off, but Madi is a part of the family, and she has an actual vested interest in Clarke's romantic entanglements.

"Are you worried?" she asks, putting her book aside to put her full focus on her daughter. "What do you want me to say?"

"I'm just curious."

"I do like him," Clarke admits. "A lot more than I was expecting to. But he's not a real romantic option, you know? In a couple months, he'll be back in Hollywood and just another cute guy on TV."

"But I think he likes you too," Madi says, soft but insistent. "So maybe he doesn't have to be."

Clarke sighs. "I want to think that too. Obviously I do. But I have to be realistic. He's nice to everyone, you've seen the show. And yes, he's definitely being nicer to me than he has to be. To you too. He likes us, I know that. But that doesn't mean me and him could have any kind of--real relationship. It's just going to be a cute story."

"Long distance is a thing, Clarke," she says, and Clarke has to snort.

"Thanks for letting me know."

"I'm serious! I know you guys probably aren't going to get married and live happily ever after or anything, I'm not getting invested in this. But you could at least see if he wants to try something. Before he does leave. You don't have to talk yourself out of it just because you're scared."

She opens and closes her mouth. "I don't have to, but I still might," she finally says. "It's been fun, I might just want it to be a nice, no-drama memory. No awkward conversation about feelings."

Madi rolls her eyes. "It could be a good memory with that conversation."

"And how many of your crushes have you confessed to, huh?" she teases. "It's not easy when the person isn't an actual celebrity."

"I guess. Are you going to keep talking to him after we get the new place?"

"Not sure. I guess we'll find out."

"Well, if you're worried about me, don't be," says Madi, turning her attention back to her video game deliberately. "If you want to tell him you like him, I support you. And if you don't, I'll probably tell you that you should have, but I know it's not my call."

"It's not. Thanks for the pep talk, though."

"It would be really cool for me if you were dating a celebrity," she says. "Just saying."

Clarke's phone pings, and she looks down to see Bellamy name in her notifications. Her heart would have jumped anyway, even if Madi hadn't said a word, but she feels more conscious of it now. Whatever this is, it's not just her. Between Raven and Madi and even a few sly comments from Octavia, she's sure everyone's noticed something is happening.

She just doesn't know what that is.

The next two days are pretty much Bellamy sending her cryptic messages about the new place while Clarke gets increasingly antsy. It's not a bad antsiness, really, more squirming anticipation, the growing hope that Bellamy did something great, mingling with the worry that he's going to let her down. It's not a big deal, really, if he doesn't nail the house. But she wants him to.

"Breathe," Raven says, when they show up for the reveal.

"I'm breathing," says Clarke.

"I'm excited," says Madi. "Clarke's just worried she's going to hate it."

"We'll do takes until it looks like you like it, don't worry."

"She doesn't want to hurt Bellamy's feelings."

"Oh, yeah," says Raven, with a dismissive wave of her hand. "He'd cry. But we'll get a take where you can't tell. He's a professional."

"I'm not going to make him cry," Clarke protests, and Raven grins.

"You're definitely not. Honestly? I'm pretty sure you're going to love it."

Clarke doesn't know what the previous "good" version of the house looked like. The exterior has always been fine, but no one had bothered staging it before, and all she saw was beat up floors and peeling wallpaper. During the renovations, it was a shell full of sawdust, and she didn't have the right kind of imagination to see how it was going to be.

Now, Bellamy is outside, bouncing on the balls of his feet in anticipation, while his sister watches him with open disgust.

"You're such a dork, Bell."

"You don't do reno, you don't get how exciting this is."

"I definitely don't." She grins at Clarke and Madi. "Okay, so, we're going to show you room-by-room, and we will be filming the whole time. We go through the house once, get notes, go through again, and then if we need extra takes on any places where you weren't excited enough, we do it again. Don't worry about your reactions the first time. Just act natural."

"I don't always show excitement very well," Clarke says, eyes cutting to Bellamy. He's always at his most polished for the reveals, and he looks good, but all Clarke wants to do is muss up his hair and tell him she'll like him no matter what happens.

"I'll coach you on squealing if you need it," says Octavia, and opens up the door before she can ask any more questions.

In some ways, of course, it doesn't really look like a real place. There are cameras and lights and sound equipment, all this stuff that will be gone as soon as they're done filming. But it's easy to ignore by this point, part of the background, and her eyes skip past it to the details, to what Bellamy's done for them, the actual house.

The gorgeous, perfect house.

Despite the newness of it all, it feels, overwhelmingly, like home. The wall color is a soft lavender, one of dozens of swatches Bellamy showed her, one she said was nice, but she hadn't even thought they were talking about her place. He'd been so careful, she hadn't even suspected he was getting her opinion.

The decoration is minimal, less than she associates with his usual renovations. There are pictures of her and Madi, some of Clarke's artwork, old posters she never got around to hanging, all arranged with matching frames. There's a gray couch with purple, red, and blue pillows arranged in bi-flag order, and two slate blue armchairs large enough she'll be able to flop down across them, all facing their new gas fireplace.

"Holy shit, Bellamy," she says, and his face breaks out in a grin.

"We definitely need a second take on that, no swearing."

She doesn't rise to the bait. "This is amazing. You know that, right?"

He ducks his head, smile warning his whole face. He looks so proud, and Clarke has never wanted to kiss anyone more in her life.

"Hey, Madi," says Octavia, too casual. "You want to say as many brand names as you can think of with me?"

If Madi thinks the request is odd, she shows no sign of it. "Sure!"

Bellamy's mouth twitches into a laugh, and he meets Clarke's eyes with half a shrug as Octavia and Madi start going. "She said if she thought I was going to embarrass myself, she'd make sure the footage was unusable."

"Aren't you the star?" Clarke asks. "Don't you have veto power?"

"O likes looking out for me." He wets his lips. "So, you like it?"

"It's gorgeous. It's everything I never knew I wanted. I don't know how I can thank you."

"I am getting paid."

"Still."

"Do you cook?"

She frowns. "Sort of. I'm working on it."

He glances over at Octavia and Madi, who are trying to name all of the brands associated with Coca Cola. "Well, you've got a really great kitchen now, so--we could get dinner."

If not for his posture, his tone, his expression, it could be ambiguous. But he's still watching her, wary hope written all over his face, body angled towards her, careful and bracing for this to go wrong.

"Do they ever do musical montages on your show? Something to take out the sound"

The question catches him off guard. "What? Uh, no. Not really."

"Good," she says, and kisses him.

It only takes him a second to catch up, not long enough for her to start worrying. He laughs, short and sweet, and then he tugs her in, sliding his arms around her waist and kissing back. She can barely remember the last time she kissed a guy, but she can't believe it was this good, all warmth and affection, like a dam breaking in her chest and flooding her whole body with tingling joy.

"So it worked, huh?" he murmurs, bumping his nose against hers.

"You didn't have to make me an awesome house to get me to kiss you. You just had to ask."

He grins. "Yeah, well, I figured it couldn't hurt."

*

For the first tour, Raven just turns off the cameras, on the grounds that she wants Octavia to shut up.

"I know you aren't going to let them do the Bellamy gets a girlfriend edit, no matter how much footage we have for it, so we don't need to get an entire tour of them holding hands and making kissy faces."

"We aren't making kissy faces," Bellamy protests, without letting go of her hand.

"How much footage do you have?" Clarke asks, curious. "For that edit."

"All of it," Raven says. "Seriously, it's going to be harder to cut you guys making heart eyes at each other."

Bellamy rolls his eyes."Yeah, if you cut how much O hated that couple who wanted five bedrooms last year, you can cut this. I'm not worried."

"I'm just saying, it would be a pretty kickass episode if we did do the romantic subplot."

"If they want to put together that edit and try to convince me, they can," says Bellamy. "But they don't need this walkthrough anyway."

Clarke's pretty sure that's true, at least. It's way too casual, even leaving aside the romance, Bellamy showing off things he's proud of with no consideration given to what the audience might think. It's a tour entirely for Clarke and Madi's benefit, personal and small, private. Boring, for anyone who isn't them. Clarke wants technical details no one's interested in, Madi wants to brag about what she did, and Raven is going to have notes for days.

Still, Clarke stops them before they can go to the basement. "We should have the cameras for this."

Madi's immediately on alert. "They didn't even do anything in the basement."

"Maybe they did."

"There's a surprise?" she asks, eyes going huge. "And you didn't tell me?"

"It's a surprise."

"It's reality TV! I didn't think they were real surprises."

"Usually no," says Octavia. "But Bell isn't usually into the clients. He just wanted to impress Clarke."

"Hey, I wanted to impress Madi too," he protests. "We should do a quick intro before we actually go in."

The cameras start to roll, and Bellamy gives Clarke's hand one last squeeze before he lets go and slips into his TV persona, an obvious and immediate shift. It doesn't feel like a loss, now that she knows how he feels; just like another part of him. She's not missing out on anything. He's still Bellamy.

"I know we said we weren't doing anything in the basement, but we actually got a little done in there."

"What?" asks Madi, looking between him and Clarke, shrewd. "What did you do?"

"I haven't seen it either," Clarke says.

"Yeah, but you know what he did."

Bellamy holds the door open for them. "You should go look."

Clarke goes first, then Madi, Octavia, and Bellamy. The basement itself is still largely unfinished, aside from a laundry corner and a fridge for storage, but Bellamy's put up a wall to divide the space, made of rough, dark planks, as if Madi might have put it together herself.

"What is it?" she asks, her curiosity genuine and unselfconscious.

"Seriously, just look," he says, opening the heavy door. "I'm not giving it away."

It's a perfect little space. The workbench is built under a high window that lets in the pale sunlight, equipped with tools and some materials. The stool is high and cushioned, comfortable for hours of sitting. Track lights run all around the perimeter of the space, keeping it bright if Madi works late. There's both a whiteboard and a chalkboard mounted on the wall Bellamy constructed, while the workbench continues against the wall of the basement. It takes Clarke a second to put together what he's done there, but when she does, she nearly kisses him again. It's a Lego table, with bases built in and colored bins on the side so Madi can organize all her pieces. She could build a whole city here without running out of space.

"This is amazing," Madi says, looking between Clarke and Bellamy like she can't decide which of them she's trying to thank.

"This was all Bellamy," Clarke says. "I just gave him some extra money."

"It was Clarke's idea. You were doing such a good job helping me out, she thought you might want your own space to work."

"The Legos were your idea."

He shrugs. "I had another wall to work with."

Madi hugs Clarke and then Bellamy, and then comes back to hug Clarke again, squeezing so tight it almost hurts. "You didn't have to do this," she says. "It must have been so expensive."

Clarke kisses her hair. "I wanted you to have a place of your own. I'm glad you like it."

"It's amazing. Thank you, Bellamy."

His smile has nothing to do with the cameras. "I'm glad you like it too." He clears his throat, glancing at Raven. "So, uh, take two? For the cameras?"

"If you can keep your hands to yourself."

"Yeah, don't worry. I can wait."

*

For the next two months, time is weird, in that way it always is when big changes are happening. Clarke not only has a new home, but a new boyfriend, one with a weird schedule and an even weirder job. He still texts regularly, but now when he's done for the day, he calls to see if he can come over. Left to her own devices, she'd be happy to have him over every night, to have him sleeping in her bed and making her breakfast, but there's Madi to think about. She might like Bellamy, but that doesn't mean she wants a virtual stranger living with her, and Clarke doesn't want her to feel pressured. So he comes over and helps her make dinner in her gorgeous new kitchen, shows her how to work her new fireplace, helps Madi out in her new workshop. He doesn't seem to mind the slow pace, but Clarke's aware of the end of their time together getting closer and closer, the day when he goes home rushing towards them.

Still, she doesn't ask him until a week before his final reno is set to end. Madi is at a friend's for the night, so he's sleeping over, and Clarke doesn't want to pop the bubble of warm companionship, doesn't want to ruin the moment. But it's probably going to be their last moment like this, at least for a while. She wants to know when she'll get him back.

"Did you book your flight yet?" she asks.

"Hm?"

"To go back to LA."

"Yeah." He shifts a little, tugging her closer against his bare chest. "I don't have to stay long, but I don't want to--"

"You don't have anything to do here."

"I don't have a ton to do there either, I'm on vacation. But you're not, and Madi isn't. And I don't--" He huffs, frustrated. "Jesus, I like you, okay? Obviously I want to be here instead of LA. But I know it's complicated, and I'm not just going to invite myself to live in your house. I can afford to fly back for some weekends? We can schedule. Just--let me know when I can come and I can be here."

She has to smile. "You could have said something sooner."

"So could you."

"Yeah." She sighs, presses her lips against his collarbone. "You know if I didn't have Madi, I'd tell you to just spend your break here, right?"

"I figured, yeah."

"I'll talk to her about it. We can start with a weekend or two, if you want, and then--there's a guest room. She might not mind if you stayed."

"For a weekend, I could do a hotel too."

"I'd rather have you here."

"Me too. But a hotel is close enough."

She smiles. "Yeah, but if you're just going to be here all the time anyway, it would be a waste of money."

"I'm playing the long game here. I don't want to rush Madi, I want her to like me."

"She does like you."

"Yeah, but--" He shifts again, awkward, and she props herself up on his chest so she can look at him.

"But what?"

"I want her to want me to be her dad. Or her--whatever you are. I want to be that, someday. But I'm not expecting it to happen soon."

"What about when the show starts back up?" she asks.

"I can still visit on weekends. And I was already planning on next season being my last. It'll be another year, but--you've got colleges around here. I could go back to school."

She has to laugh, melting against his chest with it.

"What? They're good colleges."

"Not that, just--you really want to do this. Be with me."

"Yeah. I want to try, anyway. It could always go wrong, but--"

"I want to try too." She grins at him. "No wonder you did such a good job on the house."

He shrugs, trying to be casual, but his cheeks are flushed. "I did say I was playing the long game."

Clarke settles back, eyes sliding shut. The anxiety of not having had the conversation has drained out of her, leaving only sleepy contentment in its wake. "You did," she agrees. "And I'm pretty sure you're going to win it."