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The villain stood atop the roof of the bakery and squared his shoulders as he stared down at the pro heroes walking out the shop bellow. He'd been stalking them for days trying to find their weakness - a loved one, a partner, anything - to use against them as blackmail, but so far he'd only seen the two of them hanging out and visiting each other’s apartments between hero work and teaching at Yuuei. It was confounding. Everyone had someone they cared about. Usually heroes had families they visited or came home to, but these two single idiots only seemed to visit each other. Which was a problem on two aspects.
One, they were both pro heroes and rather formidable ones at that. His quirk made the victim attack the person they loved the most, but even if their most loved person was each other that brought him to issue number two.
If he hit Present Mic first, Eraserhead could erase his quirk before he could inflict the other hero. Alternately, if he hit Eraserhead first by some miraculous happenstance in catching him off guard, Present Mic could scream him into oblivion and foil his plans instantly.
No, if he were going to do this, he decided as he watched them turn a corner, he would have to catch them simultaneously. He furrowed his brow in consternation as he listened to Mic ask Eraser if he dared him to stuff four whole doughnuts into his mouth, already talking around one and holding another. How could he do it?
Getting an idea, he quickly descended the fire escape and made his way to the alley that would head them off. He grinned to himself, and came around the corner, donning a lost expression. He turned in circles and scratched his head as if looking for something. Heroes loved helping people. He would just stand in their path looking in need of help and they'd stop and-
“So then she said to me,” Mic was saying with a mouth full of sugary treats from the bakery. “have you seen the new episode of LBZ?”
“Hm,” Eraser was agreeing as they approached.
“And I was like what show is that again? Cause I was drawing a major blank and she looks at me and goes ‘LigmaBaaaaallsZ!!’ like DragonBallZ!” Mic half shouted half choked with laughter at the punch line as they walked right past the confused pedestrian looking around aimlessly. Aizawa snorted. Partially for the joke, partially for how muffled it sounded around a mouth full of food.
The villain paused, looking at the two pro heroes walking away without giving him so much as a first glance let alone a second. He wasn’t sure why, but he was a little indignant at their lack of reactions. These people were heroes! They were supposed to help people! And they just ignored him like some chewed gum on a sidewalk.
“Excuse me!” he called after them, trying to keep the indignance out of his voice and sound hopefully pleading. “Sirs! Excuse me!” They continued walking, not even realizing he was calling out to him and he had to jog to catch up as he called out to them before they got too far away. “Excuse me!” he said, waving them down. At last they halted and he was able to come to a stop just before them and take a moment to catch his breath. After running down a fire escape and crawling over a back alley fence, he was beginning to wonder if this was even worth it.
Mic swallowed hard and cleared his throat, flecks of doughnut still on his face. “Hello listener! Everything okay?” A bright Present Mic trademark smile.
“I was actually hoping you could give me some directions,” he said, letting out a breath. “I'm a bit lost.”
“Wouldn't it be logical to just GPS the location?” Eraser suggested.
It took every ounce of his will power not to cut Eraser a look of a lifetime. “My phone is dead, you see. I'm not from around here...”
“The convenience stores sell maps of the area,” Eraser replied.
“How would I know where I was on the map if I don't even know where I am?” he countered, unable to stop himself.
Mic chuckled. “Fair point, listener! Where are you trying to go?”
He gave them an address a few streets over and Mic gave him very clear directions on how to get there. When he was sure the listener was able to recount the directions, he nodded and bid him goodbye. Before he could turn, the villain clasped them both on the shoulders.
“Thank you both, very much,” he said, cracking a broad grin.
“You're wel-” Mic began then dropped his smile and glared at Aizawa with a look that was caught between anger and confusion. Before he could react, Aizawa grabbed him by the hair and smashed his face into his knee. Mic reeled backwards with a growl, a fresh spurt of blood gushing from his nose and nailed Aizawa in the jaw with a right hook. The villain had to duck to miss it and jumped back, a gleeful glint in his eye.
This was going better than he had hoped!
“What's happening?!” Eraser growled as he crouched, ready to tackle Mic. His hair was floating above his head, making sure to erase Mic's quirk so they were on equal footing.
The villain cackled, catching their attention momentarily. “I got you with my quirk!” he revealed. “It makes you attack the person you love the most!”
Mic stiffened and Aizawa tackled him to the ground, hitting square in his center of gravity. They slammed against the pavement and rolled. Aizawa straddled him and reared back to punch him.
“NOT THE FACE!” Mic yelled, barely managing to catch his blow and throw him off the mark by twisting his arm. Aizawa lost his balance and Mic used that momentum to shove him off. Aizawa rolled, but as Mic tried to gain the upper hand and roll to pin him, Aizawa connected his boot with Mic's stomach and kicked out, slamming Mic against the storefront. If the wind hadn't been knocked out of him, he'd have screamed at Aizawa and sent him flying into the street with his quirk. As it was, his head was spinning with the villain's words.
He got to his feet, unable to stop himself from trying to swing at Aizawa again.
“Wait!” he gasped, flailing like a puppet on a string as Aizawa darted out of the way and brought his hands together to form a double fist and smash them against Mic's spine. Mic crumpled but quickly spun his legs out, knocking Aizawa off his feet. “The person you love the most?”
“Yes!” the villain cackled, watching the chaos.
“But you attacked me first!” he said to Aizawa as he managed to dodge the other man's attack. Thank God Aizawa hadn't worn his scarf out. This fight would have been over in a blink without Mic's quirk to back him up.
“I don't want to talk about it!” Aizawa grumbled, obviously straining to fight the quirk. He was failing. “If you can just knock me out and blast him we might be able to break free of this.”
“But even if you get knocked out, I might still try to hurt you - it's too risky!” Mic replied. They danced in a circle, occasionally darting forward to exchange blows. Mic caught Aizawa in the stomach and Aizawa elbowed him in the ribs hard.
“No you'd have a chance to turn towards him when you go to attack the person you love the most,” Aizawa said. “Use that opportunity to use your quirk on him.”
“But I'm already fighting the person I love the most!” Mic cried as his fist connected with Aizawa's nose. His face was so bloody Mic wanted to cry.
“Wait what?” Aizawa was so startled he froze, his mind locking up. Mic took a running leap at his distraction and roundhouse kicked him hard.
“I said I love you, you idiot!” he yelled as his leg made contact with Aizawa's shoulder. Aizawa grunted and Mic heard a crack. “I'm so sorry!” he cried.
“Nothing says I love you like a roundhouse kick to the face,” Aizawa grunted, staggering to his feet holding his bad arm. He ran at Mic full force and lept in the air, planting both feet into Mic's chest and sending them both crashing to the ground. Mic had reeled backward and rolled into the street, and narrowly missed being hit by a car.
He got to his feet, wiping away the blood from his mouth where his face had scraped the pavement, cracking his glasses and grinned at Aizawa who got to his own feet.
“I can't believe you love me,” he beamed. “I'm so happy!” he laughed, suplexing Aizawa into the pavement. Suddenly the strain on his limbs eased and he collapsed to his knees with a relieved noise. The quirk had worn off. “Oh thank All Might,” he swore. “I’m going to fucking kiss you you bastard.” When he got no reply, he realized the reason the quirk had worn off was because Aizawa had lost consciousness. He turned to find the villain still watching with glee, not having realized they were free in his excitement.
Until he locked eyes with Mic who was now extremely pissed off.
*~*~*
The ambulance weaved its way through the throng of police vehicles and Mic sat in the back next to Aizawa on a stretcher as the other man came to.
“Hey,” Mic grinned as the paramedic checked Aizawa's vitals. “Glad to see you awake.”
“No thanks to you,” Aizawa grumbled half heartedly, waving away the paramedic's questions. “I'm fine. Just have a splitting headache.”
“I'm sorry I suplexed you into the pavement. And bit your arm. And punched your face. And broke your nose,” he listed off.
“And roundhouse kicked me, and dislocated my shoulder,” Aizawa added.
“I love you,” Mic grinned sheepishly. “Get better okay?”
“I'm going to kiss you when my mouth heals,” Aizawa replied. “Idiot.”
Mic snorted. “I look forward to it.”
“Your face is still pretty even though your eyes are swelling. I did a good job of avoiding the worst of it,” Aizawa commented.
“Don't you mean the best of it?” Mic grinned.
“No,” Aizawa grumbled. “I love your eyes almost as much as I love your hair.”
“Awe!” Mic cooed. “Is that why you grabbed me by the hair and smashed my face against your knee?”
“Yeah,” Aizawa admitted. Mic put his hand to his chest and made a heartfelt cooing noise again.
“I love your face,” he replied. “That's why I kept punching the shit out of it.”
“You also went for my-”
“Yeah don't list everything I went for there will be regrets on both sides,” Mic said quickly, remembering the paramedics could hear everything they were saying.
“Fair,” Aizawa agreed, seeming to follow his line of thought. “I'm still surprised you managed to read my movements so well.”
“We've been sparring together for how many years?” Mic reminded him. “I picked up a few things.”
“Oh... right...” Aizawa remembered.
*~*~*
In the hospital, they'd been treated and placed in beds side by side in the same room, the nurses obliging to move them closer so they could hold hands. Recovery girl was helping out at a different ward and would be able to attend to them immediately, so they had been placed in temporary casts and their wounds doctored as much as the on staff quirks could without severely draining their energy to dangerous levels. There were so many wounds, it was impossible to heal everything at once.
When their friends piled into the room, worried expressions turning to shock at their state, Mic just grinned and waved at them.
“Hey guys!” he said. “So good news and bad news.”
“What happened!” Nemuri demanded.
“Tell me you got the guy,” Kan said with a warning.
“Well yeah,” Mic began.
“Good,” Kan said, cutting him off. “Because if not we were about to go to town on a villain.”
“What kind of quirk did he have?” Tensei asked. “From the looks of it it was a strength quirk but if they got both of you there must have been some speed to it as well.”
“No no,” Mic said. “It was more complicated than that. But, that's not the point - I have good news!”
“Catching the ass who did this to you wasn't the good news?” Kan asked.
“Oh no that's part of it,” he replied, grinning at Aizawa. “In fact, I'm engaged to him now.”
There was a long silence as that sunk in.
“Wait what?” Nemuri asked, followed by a flood of questions. Mic calmed them down again.
“We got hit with a quirk that made us beat each other up,” he explained.
“WHAT!” Nemuri shrieked. “YOU'RE ENGAGED TO AIZAWA?!”
“Wait I'm lost,” Tensei said. “Start from the beginning.”
“Yeah! Who asked who?!” Nemuri exclaimed.
“Well he hit me first but I roundhouse kicked him so I think that counts more,” Mic replied.
“I drop kicked you!” Aizawa complained. “That counts way more!”
“Dude I broke you face, dislocated your arm and knocked you unconscious,” Mic argued.
“And I broke three of your ribs, cracked four more, blackened both your eyes, ripped your hair out, and landed more hits,” Aizawa countered.
“You fight like a cat,” Mic replied. Aizawa turned bright red.
“Wh...what the fuck guys?” Kan asked.
“Oh right!” Mic remembered. “Bad news, we're postponing the wedding until I have full facial movement, but you are all invited and we want you to be in it.”
“I call maid of honor!” Nemuri burst out.
“Of course!” Mic agreed.
“Wait wait wait,” Kan interjected. “You got hit with a quirk that made you kick each other's asses and now you're getting married?”
“It made you attack the person you love the most,” Aizawa replied.
Nemuri put her hand to her chest and gasped much in the same way Mic had on the ambulance. “Aaaaaaawwwwe! That is so sweet!”
“Kan are you crying?” Tensei asked, appalled.
“The more they kicked the shit out of each other the more they showed each other how much they were loved,” he murmured, furiously wiping his face. “I'm not an animal okay? Even I think that's beautiful.”
“They're nearly invalids!” Tensei objected.
Kan’s lip quivered. “That's a lot of love,” he choked weakly. “I gotta step out a sec-” he said quickly, darting out the room before they could see him cry.
“I'm... happy for you?” Tensei said uncertaintly. “I just... wish this revelation didn't come with bodily harm.”
“That's fair,” Aizawa nodded.
“Hey,” Mic said, grinning at Aizawa. “Sign my titty cast.”
“Only if you sign my face cast,” Aizawa replied.
“That's not really a cast, but I'll still sign it,” Mic agreed.
“Then sign my sling,” Aizawa replied.
“I'll sign both,” Mic grinned. “You'll have to come over here though, I can't get up.”
“....Tensei move the beds closer,” Aizawa instructed.
“You can wait to sign the casts,” Tensei argued.
“No they'll probably get taken off once recovery girl gets here,” Aizawa argued. “I need to sign Mic's titty cast before it gets taken off.”
“Everyone! Sign my titty cast! Quick!!” Mic yelled. Tensei groaned as Nemuri jumped to her feet and grabbed the dry erase marker from the whiteboard on the wall. It was hot pink.
“I'm drawing boobs on you first,” she declared.
“Yeeeesss,” Mic agreed, moving the hospital gown to reveal his cast and boxer shorts. They had cats printed across them.
“....Those are mine aren't they?” Aizawa noted as Tensei pushed their beds together.
“You left them at my house when you borrowed my shower when your hot water was out,” Mic grinned sheepishly.
“I want them back,” Aizawa replied.
“Finders keepers,” Mic replied. “Or we can share them.”
“Gross,” Tensei balked, making a face.
“Logical,” Aizawa agreed.
“There!” Nemuri declared. “You are now boobiful!” She stood back and examined her handiwork.
“What do you think?” Mic said, turning towards Aizawa and lifting his shirt.
“Give me the marker,” he instructed Nemuri. “I'm writing ‘honk if you love Jesus’ under them.”
“No wait write ‘honk if you like these kitties’,” Mic replied. “Then I'll write ‘honk honk bitches’ on your face.”
“Perfect,” Aizawa agreed, already putting his messy scrawl on the cast. He gave the marker to Mic and let him write the message on his face, wincing slightly as the pressure made his face twinge a bit with pain.
“Sorry,” Mic apologized. “I'll kiss it better later,” he promised.
“I'm taking pictures of this and it's going to be in the engagement announcements,” Nemuri laughed, snapping photos with her phone.
“Yes!!!” Mic agreed. “Perfect!”
“Send me those,” Aizawa said. “They're going on my wall.”
“Our wall,” Mic agreed, grinning.
“Our wall,” Aizawa nodded, a smile tugging at his lips.