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Jisung has many problems in his life: his favorite pencil case broke and now he has to carry all of his art supplies around in a paper bag until he can buy a new one after school, he didn’t have enough time to style his hair this morning so he looks like an emo teen straight out of 2008, and he’s late to class. Like, really really late.
He’s running through the halls, desperately praying that he’ll make it to class before the second bell, when he barrels into someone. He hears a soft fuck and his eyes widen. “Oh god I’m so sorry,” he says quickly, taking a few shaky steps back to get a look at who he just ran into.
“It’s alright, are you late?” Hwang Hyunjin asks him and oh god he ran into Hwang Hyunjin, his little fan club is probably going to come after him and steal all of his art supplies and read through his lyric book and make fun of everything he’s written and— “Jisung?”
Jisung snaps out of his internal monologue. “Ye–Yeah, I’m late.”
“You should probably start running again, then,” Hyunjin tilts his head at him, grinning.
“Yeah, yup, should start running again, bye,” he says, saluting to him for some fucking reason, and then he darts down the next hallway.
~
The second time Jisung runs into Hyunjin he does it quite literally. His paper bag (that he still hasn’t replaced, he should get on that) spills art supplies all over the courtyard. All of Hyunjin’s textbooks are also knocked to the floor. Jisung’s knocked flat on his back from the sheer force of his running.
Hyunjin, thankfully, doesn’t get the same treatment. Instead of a disheveled mess on the floor he’s a pretty put-together boy on the floor. It’s the little victories.
“Oh my god,” Hyunjin says, momentarily freezing and then unfreezing, leaning forward to rest a hand on Jisung’s shoulder, “are you okay?”
Jisung freezes in disbelief because out of everybody in this school he just had to knock over Hwang Hyunjin, who is arguably the love of everyone at their miserable little high school’s life. He takes a second to consider the repercussions of skipping class, so he can move onto his knees and apologize to Hyunjin properly, when he realizes if he’s even later than he already is he’ll definitely get a detention.
“I’m late,” Jisung stutters out, face heating up as he hears Hyunjin giggle at him. Not even a laugh, it’s an honest to god giggle. After his brain reboots, the sheer amount of cuteness quite literally shutting it down, he hastily reaches for everything that fell out of his bag, pointedly ignoring the way Hyunjin observes him with amusement in his eyes.
Hyunjin picks up a notebook and Jisung blanches when he realizes it’s not a sketchbook. It’s his lyric book. He snatches it up as quickly as possible, stuttering out even more apologies when he sees Hyunjin jump in surprise.
“I’m—uh—Th–Thank you,” Jisung stumbles over his words because fuck Hwang Hyunjin is in front of him, giggling at his stupid gay ass. Jisung’s heart physically cannot take this any time of the day, let alone this early in the morning.
Hyunjin smiles at him, lips curled at the corner in a way that makes Jisung’s heart almost commit mutiny and jump out of his chest. “We have to stop meeting like this.”
All the color drains from Jisung’s face. “I’m so sorry.”
His eyes widen. “No, no, I’m kidding—kind of,” Hyunjin says in between bouts of giggles.
Jisung collects the rest of his supplies in his arms and struggles to get on his feet. He would’ve fallen back on his ass if it weren’t for Hyunjin. He grabs his waist gently, helping him find his balance, and Jisung nods awkwardly at him again before running off towards his class, praying Hyunjin didn’t see just how red his face was.
~
Jisung feels like he should explain to somebody just why it’s so important that it was Hwang Hyunjin that he ran into. Sadly, nobody wants to listen. That doesn’t stop him from thinking about it all the time.
You see, Jisung knows of Hyunjin. He’s the most popular boy in school, the love of everyone’s life, and the vice president of their school’s dance club.
(Jisung went to see one of their showcases once with Chan and left breathless because of the way Hyunjin moved, fluid like the ocean, but left him feeling horribly parched.)
That being said, they’ve never really talked, maybe a kind hello once or twice if they managed to be in the same room as each other, but other than the odd book project, they’re in completely different circles. Which isn’t necessarily bad, Jisung has his interests and Hyunjin his, but sometimes when he finds himself listening to Jeongin talk about how much of a loser he thinks Hyunjin is during the class they share together and feels a pang in his chest.
They’re in completely different circles but sometimes Jisung wishes they overlapped just enough for them to talk more than twice a year.
Everyone knows Hyunjin but at the same time it feels like no one knows him. He’s this untouchable God that everyone desperately wants approval from but never will. That doesn’t stop people from staring at him in the halls, practically worshipping him, like he’s somehow better and more than them. Everyone talks about Hwang Hyunjin but never dares to talk to him.
Jisung looks down on the people that treat him that way, but he’s guilty of never taking that final leap and starting a conversation with him. The most he’s ever talked to Hyunjin had been when he had one foot out the door, too late to class to really talk to him. He keeps thinking to himself one of these days, one of these days you’ll talk to him, but that day never comes.
Turning the corner of the hallway he first ran into Hyunjin in, Jisung makes a promise to himself.
He’ll talk to Hyunjin by the end of the year, and not just three words and then bouncing. Jisung will have at least one full conversation with him. He swears on it.
~
“I really can’t believe you Jisung,” Changbin says as they walk down the halls of Jisung’s high school, the same high school Changbin himself used to go to, but graduated from last year.
Why he’s back on his old stomping grounds? Jisung’s dumb and forgot his lyric and sketchbooks in his locker.
“I’m sorry!” he says, truly meaning it. The dance team’s practice just ended and they’re probably walking down the same hallways as him to leave and he does not want to run the risk of running into Hyunjin.
“It’s alright Jisung. Where’s your locker again?” Chan asks, offering him a supportive smile.
Chan, Jisung figured out within three minutes of knowing him, is the nicest person on earth. He’s way nicer than Changbin, who likes to laugh at his pain. Jisung’s pain being all of his encounters with a certain someone.
They reach the locker soon enough, Changbin looking around the school with a look of disgust on his face, and Chan excitedly tells them about his plans for their next song.
“I’ll be on it as long as Jisung’s part isn’t stupid,” Changbin says, knocking Jisung out of his head.
Jisung shoves him into a locker. “It won’t be stupid!”
“Jisung, I’ve read most of the stuff you’re writing right now, and they’re all about that boy,” Changbin says, rubbing his shoulder.
“That doesn’t mean they’re stupid!” Jisung says, not even denying his accusations, because they’re true.
Chan holds a hand out between them, to stop them, Jisung assumes, but then he realizes he’s pointing. He look up at Chan in confusion. “That’s your locker,” he says.
Jisung’s face lights up and he punches in his password, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He snaps his head in the other direction when he hears footsteps. Hyunjin and his friend Felix round the corner and Jisung blanches.
Hyunjin’s laughing at a joke Felix just made as they walk past them, not paying them any mind.
Jisung clutches his chest. “What the fuck. I think I’m having a heart attack.”
“You’re just gay, stop being dramatic,” Changbin says, slamming Jisung’s locker shut with a sense of finality, almost daring him to speak again.
~
Hyunjin was right, they really do need to stop meeting like this. Jisung’s on the floor again, his brand new pencil pouch thrown somewhere across the hall from the momentum of them running into each other, and Hyunjin stands above him, sheepishly scratching the back of his neck.
“I’m so sorry,” he says, grimacing.
Jisung sighs. “It’s alright. At least I’m not late this time.” His words are true, he got to school ten minutes before the bell rings today.
How they managed to run into each other despite this?
“No, it’s my fault. I was the one rushing this time,” Hyunjin says, walking over to pick up the pouch. His words are also true, Jisung had turned the corner foolishly not expecting something to go wrong and ran right into Hyunjin.
“I’m just annoyed that I’m always the one that falls,” Jisung says, trying and failing at trying to not pout.
Hyunjin helps him up. “It’s cause you’re so small,” he says, laughter in his voice.
“I won’t hesitate, bitch,” Jisung shoots back, because it is seven in the morning and his filter, barely effective as is when it’s working, hasn’t fired up yet.
Hyunjin laughs to Jisung’s relief. “I should go.”
“Yeah,” Jisung says lamely, “Have fun with whatever you’re late for.”
“Thanks,” Hyunjin sends him one last smile before heading off, leaving Jisung with a tight feeling in his chest.
~
“Just kill me Binnie hyung, I can never face him again,” Jisung says, his words slightly muffled because of the pillow he currently has his face buried in.
Changbin—or Binnie as he calls himself, which really takes away from the whole cool, intimidating rapper image he’s trying so desperately to have—snorts from where he’s sitting at his desk working on a new song for their Soundcloud.
Well, it’s not just their Soundcloud account, it’s Jisung, Changbin, and Chan’s Soundcloud account, and yeah, it might be a little embarrassing at times when people make fun of him for having it, but then they actually listen to their music, and that shuts them up pretty quickly.
“You’ve literally never faced him,” Changbin says, not even looking away from his screen.
Jisung groans, he should’ve gone to Chan instead, at least he would have been nice about it. He flops onto his back and eyes the cross Changbin’s mom hung up in his room to remind him to be a good son or something. “Just smite me, God.”
“God wouldn’t deign himself to smite you,” Changbin throws a pen at his head.
Jisung throws it back. “The only way I’m gonna die is if God himself kills me.”
“Guess you’re immortal then.”
“Yup, I’m gonna spend all of my long, long life talking about my favorite Binnie hyung who acted like he was some big, scary intimidating person when in reality he was scared of the dark and—” Jisung’s cut off by Changbin shooting up from his chair and tackling him onto the bed.
Changbin shoves his face into a pillow. “Shut up! Shut up you actual menace!”
“You love me!” Jisung pants out once he’s free from Changbin’s grip. It was quite the struggle.
“Right now? Only slightly,” Changbin says, picking up his hat from where it landed after Jisung knocked it off in the scuffle.
Jisung pouts. “Guess I’ll just have to show you the raps I wrote earlier during third hour. Will that make you love me again?”
“Depends, are they about the pretty boy you ran into today?” Jisung nods mutely. “Then no, I don’t want to hear them.
Jisung throws a pillow at him. “He’s my polaris hyung! You have to support me and my gay bullshit!”
“Polaris?”
Jisung swoons, falling back onto the bed. “He has this mole underneath his eye that reminds me of the north star.”
Changbin blinks. “That’s the gayest shit to ever come out of your mouth. Congratulations, I have to kill you now,” and with that he dives back on top of Jisung and slides his hands down to his waist, digging his finger into the flesh there.
Jisung’s eyes widen and he screams, squirming in an attempt to get Changbin off of him, but it’s no use.
Changbin: 1 Jisung: 0
~
The only class Jisung shares with Hyunjin is his creative writing class. Thankfully the awkwardness that settles deep in his bone whenever Jisung sees him isn’t enough to make Jisung hate the class.
Well, if that doesn’t make him hate it, then the sight he sees when he walks into class might just. Poetry is written across the whiteboard in big block letters and Jisung stops in his tracks, staring at the board.
It’s not that Jisung dislikes poetry—he spends most of his time writing raps—but writing stuff for a grade takes away from how intimate the whole process is in his mind. Digging into the deepest parts of his mind to write a song just isn’t the same as doing it for a class assignment. When the teacher reads his poems he’ll know that he wrote it, not just some faceless person of SoundCloud rapping about his problems.
Jisung zones out throughout the entire lecture their teacher gives them, trying to figure out what he should write about. He has one tiny thought about writing about his newest muse, but then he glances over at said muse whose eyebrows are pinched together as he listens to the teacher and realizes that’d be way too embarrassing.
He looks away as quickly as he can, not wanting to catch Hyunjin’s attention, but can’t stop himself from looking over periodically throughout the rest of the lecture. You can’t blame him though, Hyunjin looks cute when he’s focusing, and Jisung is already so far gone.
The rest of the class is spent staring at his paper, sneakily trying to look at Hyunjin, and writing what Jisung considers the shittiest poem ever. It’s bad, really, really bad, but he has no idea for what else to write. He hears Hyunjin laugh from across the room and suddenly wants to write about it, but stops himself, because he refuses to embarrass himself goddamnit.
By the time he hands in his horrible poem there’s ten minutes left of class and Jisung’s ready to go crawl into a hole and die. He pulls out his lyric notebook and goes to town writing about everything he’s been thinking of the past hour and a half.
He’s on a role, but it stops when the teacher calls for him. Jisung sighs, closes his book, and slinks over to the front of the room, pointedly ignoring the way everyone in the class looks up to watch him go.
“I’m really disappointed in you Jisung,” is the thing his teacher starts with, and effectively breaks Jisung’s heart into pieces even though he knows the poem sucked. “I know you, you could do a whole lot better than this.”
Jisung bows, willing his hands to stop shaking. “I’m sorry. I’ll do better next time.”
The teacher nods and waves him off. Jisung makes his way back to his desk and packs up all of his things, sudden motivation gone. He lays his head on the desk when he’s done, face turned away from everyone else, and considers skipping next hour to go to the roof and scream his frustrations away.
He misses the way Hyunjin worriedly glances over at him.
~
Day two of the poetry unit goes a whole lot better than day one. Jisung swallows his pride and writes a couple super vague poems about Hyunjin’s smile, which gets a smile out of his teacher. It’s stupid, the poems are stupid, the giddiness he feels rereading them is stupid, but he’s getting better.
Changbin reads them aloud that night as they’re working on a new song, laughing at them, but Jisung really can’t find it in himself to mind. Chan tells him to knock it off, patting Jisung on the back as a silent you did well, you stupid gay, and flicks Changbin on the back of his head to get him to get back to work.
Jisung smiles softly as he watches them bicker back and forth. He’s incredibly grateful to have them both in his life.
~
Jisung walks into the creative writing classroom for another day of writing horrible poetry with one thing on his mind: Don’t write another poem about Hyunjin. It’s simple—or at least, it should be—but he has yet to write a good poem that’s not about Hyunjin.
His plans go out the window when he looks up at Hyunjin to see him with his nose cutely scrunched up as the gears in his head shift, staring down at his paper with a purpose. Jisung feels like all the air has gotten knocked out of his lungs while his heart melts simultaneously.
Oh this, this is what it feels like to be in love.
Okay, maybe he’s not in love with Hyunjin, but this has certainly gone past enjoying looking at the other boy once in awhile. This is full blown losing sleep because he can’t stop thinking about the way Hyunjin’s eyes lit up when the teacher complimented his poem.
The poem Jisung writes that day is the stupidest one so far, stanza after stanza about all the little things he adores about Hyunjin. There’s a sense of longing in the words, longing for the day when he toughens up and actually talks to him. He talks of dizzying encounters and high pitched laughs that he wants to hear more of, be the reason for.
It’s stupid and long and basically a love letter to a one Hwang Hyunjin but Jisung doesn’t care.
His teacher loves it so much he actually reads it out loud in front of the class.
“Wait what?” Jisung says a little too loud when the teacher announces he’s going to be reading it.
Mr. Lee pauses, raising his eyebrows. “Unless you don’t want me to?”
Jisung considers telling him no, but Hyunjin’s right there, looking back and forth between him and the teacher, a look of excitement gracing his features. He nods and then lowers his eyes, staring at his hands as Mr. Lee begins to read.
He feels like he’s about to combust, it’s one thing to read something in your head, but hearing his poem read aloud is a whole other story. His face is red, he can tell, but he sits there and listens, purposely avoiding Hyunjin’s curious gaze that’s burning holes into the top of his head.
Jisung tries to keep avoiding him, but Hyunjin approaches him as he’s packing his things up.
“Hey I’m Hyunjin you kinda,” he pauses, face turning sheepish as he rubs the back of his neck, “bumped into me the other day and I wanted to let you know your writing is one of the best I’ve ever heard. Poetry like yours is kinda what inspired me to sign up for this class, but anyways I’m rambling! I hope we get to talk more soon Jisungie!”
And just like that Hyunjin’s gone, smiling at him one last time before disappearing through the classroom door.
There’s no way he’s real.
~
Jisung walks into class expecting another exciting day of writing poems but instead is faced with a seating change. He looks up at the chart projected onto the front of the room, eyes widening when he sees his name next to none other than Hwang Hyunjin’s.
He feels like god is laughing at him. Okay, maybe not god, but his teacher for sure. Jisung’s new seat is further away from the front, but he’s okay, he can do this. He can talk to Hyunjin every other day and act normal, not like he has the stupidest, fattest crush on him.
Hyunjin’s eyes light up when he walks in and sees his new spot. Jisung can’t do this.
“Hello Jisungie,” Hyunjin says when he walks over, completely obliterating Jisung in his seat.
“Hi,” Jisung, despite having been obliterated, replies back.
Hyunjin sits, pulling out his supplies for class. “Did you know we were supposed to get new seats?”
“I had no idea,” Jisung replies, mouth suddenly very, very dry.
He opens his mouth to reply again but it cut off by Mr. Lee telling them about their new seats and the goals for today, which is—shockingly—more poems. Hyunjin excitedly pulls out his notebook, humming a familiar tune as he does, and smiles at Jisung.
Jisung’s poem that day is about soft smiles and familiar songs.
~
Sitting next to Hyunjin ends up not being as bad as Jisung originally thought it’d be. He actually manages to hold conversations with him. Jisung feels really accomplished because of that. Plus his poems just keep getting better now that he knows more about Hyunjin.
Mr. Lee stops him on his way out of the room one day. “Jisung! How are you enjoying the seating change?”
Jisung pauses, not really understanding why he’s asking him of all people. “It’s nice,” he says carefully.
“Good,” Mr. Lee says, nodding his head. “Your poems have all been really good,” there’s a smirk on his face and Jisung’s face heats up.
“Thank you,” he says before running out of the room, in disbelief that his teacher knows about his stupid crush on stupid Hwang Hyunjin.
~
“You should sit with me at lunch today,” Hyunjin says, eyes focused on the text they’re supposed to be reading.
Jisung blanches. “What?”
“I never see you in the lunchroom, and I thought we had the same lunch period,” Hyunjin pouts, pouts, and Jisung feels his stomach twist.
He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “Yeah I uh, I usually eat in the art rooms.”
Hyunjin leans closer to him, a hand underneath his chin, lips still ever so pouty. “Why?”
“Well, my only friend that has lunch that hour is Jeongin and I know he already has his own group, so I didn’t want to intrude,” Jisung says, forcing himself to not look at Hyunjin’s lips.
Hyunjin’s face lights up. “Innie!!! He sits with me too! Now you have to sit with us.”
“Okay,” Jisung says, accepting his fate.
~
“Jisungie!!”
Jisung turns around just in time for Hyunjin to crash into him. “Hello to you too Hyunjin,” he says, wrapping his arms tightly around Hyunjin’s waist totally because he’s trying not to fall and not at all because he wants to hug him.
“Are you busy right now?”
He isn’t, Chan and Changbin are working on assignments. “Not that I know of, why?”
“Do you wanna come over? We can play video games or just hang out,” Hyunjin says, eyes wide and hopeful.
“Sounds fun, let me text my mom and tell her.”
Hyunjin bounces excitedly on the balls of his feet as Jisung texts his mom. “Let’s stop by the store first, I’ll buy us snacks.”
The walk to the convenience store is short but enjoyable. Hyunjin chatters excitedly, letting Jisung cut in whenever he has something to add. It’s fun and new and Jisung can’t believe he’s here.
The bell above the door jingles as they walk in, the cashier—Minho, who’s friends with Chan—nods at them as they walk in. Hyunjin waves back because he’s nice like that, and then makes a beeline to the chip aisle.
“Pick whatever you want, I’m paying,” Hyunjin tells him, eyes scanning the racks until he spots what he wants and grabs it.
Jisung hesitates and then grabs a bag of cheetos—and then grabs another when Hyunjin eyes him, arms full of at least five bags of chips.
“Hey Minho hyung,” Hyunjin says when they walk to the counter, dumping their haul onto it.
Minho eyes Jisung who smiles awkwardly back and then turns back to Hyunjin. “Hello to you too, how was school?”
“It was good! I made a new friend,” Hyunjin says, throwing an arm around Jisung.
“That’s good,” Minho says, scanning the items and then smiles mischievously as his eyes flick back to Jisung. “Chan would be proud of you Jisung.”
“You two know each other?”
“He’s friends with Channie hyung.”
Hyunjin’s mouth settles in an o shape and he nods, sliding over the cash for the chips. “Thank you,” he says when Minho hands back change and a bag.
“Have fun you two!” Minho shouts after them.
“Who’s Channie hyung?” Hyunjin asks once they’re on their way, already having opened a bag of chips.
Jisung steals one and pops it in his mouth before Hyunjin can stop him. “A friend. We make music together.”
“You make music?”
“Yeah, I rap, write lyrics, and produce,” Jisung nods.
“That’s so cool! You’ll have to show me some songs sometime.”
Jisung swallows hard. “Yeah.”
~
It’s been two months since Jisung first became friends with Hyunjin and he’s already totally enamoured by him. Honestly, it’s upsetting. Most of the songs he writes nowadays are about him, which makes things difficult when Hyunjin gets all whiny and asks to hear a song. Jisung has to swallow his panic and find an old one and try not to cry when he breaks out in praise.
The good news is that Changbin’s stopped taking the piss out of him for his newfound muse. Bad news is that Chan’s gone full Supportive Dad™.
(“So…” Chan says, taking his headphones off. They’re in the studio working on a new song which Changbin affectionately called his gayest one yet. “When do we get to meet your polaris?”
Jisung drops his head onto the table with a loud bang. “I regret telling Changbin that.”)
And that’s how we got here, Jisung nervously chewing on a pencil, eyes flicking to the clock, waiting until the time when Hyunjin said he’d be here comes.
Changbin slaps the back of his head. “Loser. Stop worrying.”
“What if you guys don’t like him?” Jisung asks, rubbing the spot where Changbin hit him, half a mind to complain about the bullying to Chan.
Changbin rolls his eyes. “I thought you said it was impossible to not like him?”
“I mean, yeah, but still!” Jisung retorts, pouting to Chan when he settles down in his chair.
Chan rubs his thigh comfortingly. “Jisung, everything will be fine.”
“I’m sure we’ll like your boyfriend a lot,” Changbin says, cracking open a soda.
“He’s not my boyfriend!”
“You want him to be your boyfriend!” Changbin yells back, ignoring the way Chan’s looking at them with his signature you’re being children, shut up look.
Jisung crosses his arms over his chest. “There’s no way in hell he likes me back.”
There’s a knock on the door and Jisung’s eyes widen, hurryingly shoving all the trash on the desk into the trash can. “Fuck.”
Changbin rolls his eyes and opens the door, eyes widening ever so slightly, and then scowls. “Welcome,” he says stepping back to let Hyunjin in.
“Uh… Hi. I’m Hyunjin,” he says, almost causing Jisung to collapse with how cute he is. He’s not even doing anything and Jisung feels butterflies in his stomach.
“Changbin,” he says, and then walks over to plop down into his seat, grabbing his headphones and putting them back on.
Jisung stares, not really knowing why he’s being an ass, but his attention snaps back to Hyunjin when Chan starts talking. “Hello Hyunjin, I’m Chan.
Hyunjin bows. “Nice to meet you.”
“Same here.”
Jisung claps his hands together, startling both of them. “Alright. Hyunjinnie, where’s my food?”
“Right here Jisungie,” Hyunjin says, lifting up a bag of what Jisung hopes is chicken, “I got enough for everyone, I think.”
Chan claps him on the back. “I approve.” Jisung glares at him and grabs the bag from Hyunjin.
Jisung’s wish came true, it was chicken. They all sit on the floor, not having enough chairs for all of them to sit at the desk, and they talk, mostly about Hyunjin.
To be honest, Jisung kind of zones out, paying more attention to the chicken in his hand and Hyunjin’s free hand on Jisung’s thigh than the conversation. It’s really distracting.
At one point Hyunjin scoots even closer to him, turning to whisper something in his ear, and Jisung has to stop himself from collapsing onto the floor.
Hyunjin reaches for a napkin to wipe off his hands and goes to stand. “Ah, I think I should head back home. Don’t want to distract you guys for too long.”
Jisung pouts, because he’s stupid and gay and wants Hyunjin to stay. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, my mom’s probably expecting me too,” Hyunjin says, gently placing a hand on Jisung’s shoulder.
“It was nice meeting you Hyunjin,” Chan says, eyeing Hyunjin’s hand on his shoulder. He blushes and takes it away, but Jisung can still feel the warmth left from it on his skin.
Changbin snorts, probably at how he knows Jisung’s sad about it. “Same here. Feel free to bring us food all the time.”
Hyunjin laughs. “I’ll remember that.” He says his goodbyes and disappears back through the door with a promise to see Jisung tomorrow.
Jisung stares after him, but Changbin snaps his hand in front of his face to get his attention. “I thought you said there was no way in hell he liked you back.”
“What are you talking about?” Jisung asks, a little dazed.
Changbin shakes his head disapprovingly. “You are so stupid.”
Chan makes a noise in the back of his throat and hits Changbin upside the head.
~
Changbin’s spent the past two weeks trying to get Jisung to admit that it’s very obvious that Hyunjin likes him back.
Jisung is stubborn and refuses to do so.
It starts with subtle jabs at when Jisung’s going to see Hyunjin again, eyebrows raised in a way that suggests something else, and then moves onto exasperated rants about how fucking obvious it is.
Today seems to be the day he’s finally snapped.
They’re in Chan’s apartment, sitting on the living room floor while they wait for their pizza to arrive. Chan himself is spread across the only couch in the room, claiming that he deserves it considering it is his house. He’s got Jisung there.
Changbin has been trying to have a conversation about Hyunjin for almost twenty minutes now, but Jisung is anything if not stubborn and refuses to entertain him.
“Sungie, please, the way he treats you. He’s obviously into you,” Changbin says, running a hand through his hair.
Jisung responds with the same thing he’s been saying for weeks now. “Hyunjin doesn’t like me back we’re just bros, you don’t understand Changbin hyung.”
Changbin looks like he’s about to throttle him. Thankfully, Chan stops him.
“I know you don’t want to hear it, but he’s right, Jisung,” Chan says, and Jisung immediately takes away his thanks.
“Exactly!” Changbin says, sitting up to lean his back against the couch. “Remember last week when we hung out with his friends?”
Jisung does remember that. It was a lot of fun, but he has no idea why Changbin’s bringing up that specific event.
“Dude, he was all over you,” Changbin says, half-heartedly throwing a pillow at him.
Jisung throws it back. “He literally wasn’t.”
“You didn’t see it because one, you’re stupid, and two, you weren’t in the room for when he literally sat on your bed, hugged your pillow, and whined until you came back,” Changbin says, narrowing his eyes at him.
Jisung falters. “We’re friends.”
“He doesn’t treat you like one. The way he acts around his other friends is completely different than the way he acts around you,” Changbin says, hitting the last nail in the coffin that is Jisung not being able to deny things anymore.
Jisung opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. The doorbell rings and Chan gets up to get it, leaving Jisung to stare out the balcony window.
He’s running out of excuses for reasons why it’s impossible for Hyunjin to like him back.
Maybe that’s not a bad thing.
~
Jisung likes Hyunjin’s home. It may just be an apartment but it has the vibe of just home. He feels comfortable there, maybe a little too comfortable, but Hyunjin assures him that it’s not a bad thing.
He unlocks his phone, checking the time, glancing over at Hyunjin when it reads 3:28 am. “Jinnie?” he asks, checking to see if he’s still awake.
Jisung doesn’t get an answer, so he lies his head back onto the floor of Hyunjin’s room, letting himself get lost in the song that’s playing softly out of Hyunjin’s phone.
More time passes, the song changes from one to another, and then another, and Jisung’s about to get up to turn it off to save Hyunjin’s battery when he speaks up.
“Who’s the star you always write about?”
Jisung freezes, mouth dropping open to say something, but again he finds himself unable to find words. Hyunjin sits up on his forearms, staring at Jisung.
It’s weird, a couple months ago if Hyunjin, or anyone really, asked him, he would’ve bullshitted his way through it in five seconds flat, but now he hesitates. Jisung’s run out of excuses, and it’s now or never.
“You.”
Hyunjin stares at him for a moment more before bursting out laughing. Jisung blanches, wondering how the hell he’s going to get himself out of this.
“Wait, wait. Really?” Hyunjin asks, the corners of his mouth upturned and his eyes sparkling.
Jisung nods, because that’s all he’s really able to do.
Hyunjin crawls forward until he’s almost on top of Jisung, hands planted next to Jisung’s head. “I remember hearing that first poem and wishing I could be loved the way you loved whoever you wrote about, but…” he trails off, the tips of his ears reddening.
“I spent so many class periods writing shitty poems because I refused to do what I wanted and write about you,” Jisung says, finally finding his voice.
Hyunjin smiles, bright and hitting Jisung right in his heart. “I loved them. Every single one.”
Jisung’s hit with a sense of holy shit, this is happening and he wraps his arms around Hyunjin’s waist. He so desperately wants to lean in and kiss him, because that’s all he’s been thinking about since the second time they ran into each other, but Hyunjin beats him to it.
He leans forward and Jisung panics for a split second before Hyunjin rubs their noses together in a bunny kiss. “It’s too early for a real one,” he whispers when he pulls back and looks at the look of absolute adoration of Jisung’s face.
“I think you’re quite possibly the best person in the whole world,” Jisung says, the words tumbling out and slurring together because he’s so happy and so tired.
Hyunjin giggles softly, moving down to lay his head on Jisung’s chest. “The feeling’s mutual.”
~
Nothing really changes after Jisung finally tells Hyunjin how he feels, other than the fact that he gets to hold Hyunjin’s hand whenever he wants everything’s normal. They still write their poems during class, now accompanied with Hyunjin trying to sneak a peek, and eat lunch in their usual group.
Hyunjin still waits for him outside of his last hour of the day, just now he kisses him on the cheek when Jisung walks out. It’s a great change.
“Snacks and my place?” Hyunjin asks, slipping his hand into Jisung’s.
Jisung squeezes Hyunjin’s hand. “Of course.”
The walks to Minho's store is the same, just a teensy bit better with Hyunjin’s hand holding his own, and they get a look from him when they walk in. Minho's eyes immediately find their intertwined hands and he smiles, sending Jisung a not so subtle thumbs up. He sends one back before he’s pulled into the chip aisle.
Nevermind, Jisung thinks as Hyunjin tries and fails to grab his normal amount of chips with one hand instead of two, things have changed, just for the better.
~
Hyunjin and Jisung usually walk everywhere since most of the places they need to go are close, but once in awhile a bus is the most appropriate mode of transportation. Which is why they’re standing at a bus stop on a particularly cold night, after what Jisung classifies as the best first date ever.
Jisung takes a peek at Hyunjin out of the corner of his eye and frowns when he sees him shiver through his not at all appropriate jacket. “Oh you’re cold? Here, have my jacket…” Jisung stutters out, because he may be cold but he’s a gentleman first.
Hyunjin furrows his eyebrows. “Won’t you be cold?”
“No, it’s fine, don’t wor—” Jisung starts, but is cut off by Hyunjin.
“Why don’t we share?” Hyunjin asks, already moving to take Jisung’s jacket off of him.
Jisung really has no idea what he means by share until Hyunjin’s behind him, surrounding him with warmth.
“Good idea?” Hyunjin asks, huffing out a laugh when he sees the tips of Jisung’s ears get even redder.
Jisung nods, practically melting against him. He’s still a little bit stiff and Hyunjin fixes that by wrapping his arms tightly around his waist. Hyunjin slips his hands under Jisung’s shirt, pressing his ice cold hands against the skin there, making Jisung jump. He laughs softly into his ear, but doesn’t take them away.
When his fingers finally warm up he starts to stroke the skin of his stomach. It’s nice, really nice, and Jisung would want to stay like this for longer if not for the fact that it’s really cold outside.
Thankfully, the bus arrives, saving them from the cold. “Thank you,” Jisung says once they settle down in their seats, hand finding Hyunjin’s.
Hyunjin hums in response, laying his head back against the window. Jisung watches as the lights from the streetlamps outside make him look even prettier than he already is. He doesn’t know he’s leaning in until Hyunjin opens his eyes, tilting his head to face Jisung.
“You can kiss me if you want,” Hyunjin says, eyes flicking down to look at Jisung’s lips.
Jisung raises a hand to cup Hyunjin’s face. “Are you sure?”
All it takes is a soft please falling from his mouth to spur Jisung on. His brain catches up to him when he presses his lips against Hyunjin’s, doing the one thing he’s been wanting to do for months.
Hyunjin leans further into him, opening his mouth slightly, and Jisung doesn’t even care that it’s nine on a friday night and they’re in public. He presses even closer, relishing in the warmth Hyunjin provides, moving his lips ever so slightly against Hyunjin’s.
Jisung pulls away first, his brain unable to process kissing Hyunjin and continuing to breathe at the same time, and Hyunjin smiles, brushing Jisung’s bangs out of his eyes. “That was worth the wait.”
“Be my boyfriend,” Jisung, once again, says without really thinking, but he doesn't mind that much. When he opens his eyes, the gravity of his words hitting him, he’s face with Hyunjin’s stupid dumb face that makes him feel like he’s gonna collapse onto the ground.
“Really?” Hyunjin asks, eyes that much more sparkly thanks to the streetlamps streaming in as they pass them.
“Really,” Jisung confirms, a belated, “please,” coming out too, this time a lot softer.
Hyunjin presses another kiss to his lips. “I’d love to be your boyfriend.”
“Good,” Jisung says, moving to lay his head on Hyunjin’s shoulder, “because I really want to be your boyfriend.”
(That night Jisung send his group chat with Chan and Changbin a picture of Hyunjin asleep on his chest. Chan’s response consists of a fuck ton of emojis which makes Jisung feel giddy. Changbin sends an exasperated fucking finally.
Looking up at the top of Hyunjin’s head, Jisung thinks back to that promise he made to himself all those months ago. He leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to the crown of his head.
Finally is right.)