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This was not the first time Rex found himself glad he wasn’t a CC series clone.
That their genetics were fekked with was a given. The Kaminoans took Jango Fett’s gene sequence and tweaked it in a thousand different ways so that from one man could come a multi-disciplined army. From the humblest Private to the most decorated Marshall Commander, none of them escaped being tampered with a little bit. No one could deny that the cloners knew what they were doing. Hardly a defect to be found among them.
But those CCs, those command clones...
To a clone, they were obsessively dedicated to their Jedi. It was more than duty, more than training, or pride in a job well done, a mission gone well. Rex could understand the allure: the headiness of being treated like a real person who mattered by someone other than vode, the bond that inevitably formed after so many battles together, the private jokes, the looks. He was sure, at first, that he was blowing it out of proportion; after all, Toby was a CC, and he went through three Jedi before he found one he could stand and who could tolerate him for more than five minutes at a time, and it was almost legendary how Commander Faie and General Vos were constantly at each other’s throats. Maybe he was reading too much into things.
And then General Kenobi died.
Cody was the steadiest brother Rex knew. Nothing phased him or upset his calm. He never sounded panicked, never scared even when hell was raining down around them. His eyes always held the slight glint of the mischievous spirit ARC training and the rigors of command only succeeded in tampering but not destroying, and his smiles and laughter were easy to rouse. He was in every respect a perfect companion for a Jedi who’s outward demeanor hid a playful spirit.
The night after General Kenobi’s funeral, Rex waited up in the officer’s barracks while Fox tracked down Cody. Afterwards, he could never remember much of that night. It was all impressions, snatches of crystal clear images and bites of half heard conversations: Toby on the bunk next to him, bright pink hair clenched between white knuckled hands as he tried and failed to have a quiet panic attack; the harsh hiss of the door opening seconds before Fox stumbled in with Cody; haggard eyes, who’s he couldn’t quite recall; whispered Clone Speak, that bastard language of cobbled together Mando’a, Basic, Kaminoan, and words that were their own, barely concealing the snap and chink of armor being removed; Cody’s armor, the paint garishly cheerful beneath unforgiving lights. There was more. The coolness of the barracks air as he and Fox manhandled Cody our of his bodysuit and dragged him into the fresher. His brother was a dead weight in his arms, his skin cool, and the water a shockingly hot contrast as he held him while Fox cleaned the day’s grime from Cody’s unresponsive body. Rex doesn’t remember leaving the fresher, but the way the three of them somehow squeezed into a bunk designed for one was clear in his mind, even decades later. So, too, was the way Cody, face tucked securely in the crook of Fox’s neck and Rex a solid weight behind him, began to cry, his pain so visceral and so raw that it left Rex shaken.
He couldn’t imagine feeling that deeply for someone who wasn’t a brother. He didn’t want to.
——
Obi-Wan realized he was more like his Master than he would like to think, and it was not in the ways he wanted it to be.
It was only natural that a Padawan would pick up at least one of their Master’s bad traits, Force knew Anakin had more than a few of his less desirable tendencies knocking around, but Obi-Wan really thought he had grown past them.
He was wrong, of course, and his error hurt someone he never intended to so much as mildly annoy.
Cody’s pain was immediately evident to him, the wave of shock and grief like a punch in the chest. At the time, he could do nothing about it but do his best to block it out and focus on completing his task as quickly as possible, but the entire time he could feel it, a yawning chasm of heartbreak that seemed to grow with each rotation, and Obi-Wan marveled at it even as it urged him to finish and quickly. How was it possible that anyone, let alone someone like Cody who could have any being he set his gorgeous eyes on, could care so deeply for someone like him? He was a Jedi. He was nothing, had nothing, could give nothing no matter how badly he might want to. His life was one of service, to the Force and the greater good. He couldn’t be selfish, no matter how much he wanted to monopolize Cody’s smiles and his laughter and the warmth of that gloved hand on his shoulder.
He just didn’t think faking his death would affect Cody all that much. That was his problem: his recklessness in regards to himself. It was almost arrogant, and he wondered what his Master would think of him now.
The relief Cody felt when he saw him was followed closely by a deep sense of hurt and betrayal. None of it showed on his face of course, and Obi-Wan could do little more than apologize to his Commander.
Things were awkward between them. Cody held himself apart, and though they continued to work well together and accomplish their objectives as though nothing was wrong, the gap between them hurt keenly. What could he do to mend the broken trust between them?
At his wit’s end, he asked Rex.
“You need to show him that he isn’t just some clone to you, sir,” Rex said, not meeting his eyes even through the holo. Obi-Wan was not surprised that Rex was upset with him. He knew how much the blond cared and looked up to his older brother.
“How can I do that, Captain? I’ve tried talking to him, and yet...” Obi-Wan sighed and rubbed his beard, tired and incredibly unhappy.
“It’s not something you can Jedi your way into, sir. Just...try and feel for once, yeah?” Rex said, and Obi-Wan found himself laughing softly. Try and feel, hm? He thanked the Captain and disconnected the transmission.
Finding Cody was not difficult. This late in their ship’s cycle, he was sure to be in his quarters either asleep or trying to get there. Obi-Wan slipped into his room silently and stood in the darkness, considering. Just feel, that’s what Rex said. He undressed to his underclothes and slid into the bunk beside Cody. His Commander woke, sucked in a breath when he realized who was with him. Obi-Wan carefully touched his bare chest.
“I’m so sorry, Cody. I will never again let you think I’m dead when I am not, you have my word as your Knight and your friend on that,” Obi-Wan said softly into the quiet room. Cody was still, not even breathing, for a long moment before he sighed and placed his hand over the one on his chest.
“I’ll hold you to that, sir.”
Of all the promises Obi-Wan failed to keep in his life, this was not one of them.
Some weeks after the Battlwnof Utapau and the rise of the Empire, Commander Cody of the Imperial Army received a highly encrypted message from an untraceable source.
I told you those tanker troopers needed to work on their aim, didn’t I, Commander?