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“You know there’s a pool going right?”
“Excuse me?”
Clint shrugs a shoulder from his perch on the counter. “Been going on for weeks.”
“And I’m supposed to care because…” You trail off, raising an eyebrow in mock question. “Oh, I see, you want an in.”
“Look, I’m not even in on it. I just wanna know.” Clint takes a sip of his coffee, his eyes remain neutral, but you swear on his purple tipped arrows that he’s smirking behind the mug.
“And what exactly would you like to know?”
“You two dating, or just fucking?”
“Excuse me?” You repeat.
“Oh, they fucking.” Clint says, so low you almost don’t hear.
“Clint.”
“Come on, man.” He dead pans for a moment. “What else am I supposed to think? Flirting all the damn time, you could cut the sexual tension with a chain saw or Cap’s shield. But let me guess, you guys haven’t done jack shit about it.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Clint huffs out a noise of shock but you ignore him. “I flirt with plenty of people. Loki, or anyone, is no exception, really.”
“Whatever you say.” Clint hops off the counter and gives your arm a pat on his way out. “Oh, to be young, dumb, and in love.”
Loki walks through the library, new book in hand, enjoying the calm evening. A smirk curls his lips when he sees you at one end of a sofa, nose in a book, oblivious to the world. He could watch you like this for hours, not that he would, well, not that he’d admit it to anyone. The way your face lights up at parts you love, how your eyes water at lines that tug at your heart for good or ill. He loves this side of you, when you’re vulnerable, open, calm. When you’re utterly lost in a book, and not throwing sass at him. Though, Norns be witnesses, he loves that too.
For a moment he simply watches you; entranced by your calm state. He debates about sending a clone to you or messing with you in one harmless way or another. But his feet betray him and he’s moving towards you without a second thought. Long legs making the distance between you dissipate within seconds.
Dropping to sit on the cushion next to you he drapes an arm over the back of the couch, finger tips brushing your shoulder.
“Fancy finding you here, little dove.”
You smile, despite yourself, but refuse to look at him. “Yeah, fuck you too for being able to make me smile over such a small thing.”
Loki hums, “And what’s gotten under your skin to elicit such a reaction? I’ve only just got here.”
“You maybe. . . but Clint’s been on my mind all day.”
Loki’s fingers stop drawing their irregular patterns on your shoulder at the mention of Clint’s name.
“Has something happened?”
“No,” you immediately wish you hadn’t mentioned anything. “Just something he said. Stupid really. You know how he can be sometimes. He’s like a giant child – they all are.”
“How did he meddle with that beautiful mind of yours?”
You pause, not sure what this might lead to. “With something resembling the truth, I suppose.”
“The truth can be as misleading as a lie, I ought to know.”
You look at him, finding only honesty in his features. He’s trying to comfort you; you think to yourself. And he doesn’t even know what’s going on. Or does he?
“It’s nothing, really. I’m just distracted today.”
Loki squeezes your shoulder, “Whatever it is, whatever’s going on in there; I’m here. I know you already know this, but you’re stronger than he knows, than any of them.”
You take a moment; thoughts flip through your mind and land on what you won’t say.
“Don’t say that.” Not unless you mean it.
His eye brows arch toward his hair line as if he can hear your inner thoughts. A ghost of a smile touches his lips as he maintains eye contact with you long enough to draw heat to your cheeks. Silence of acceptance draws itself out, taking up the small space between you on the couch.
“I think you doth protest too much, my dear.” Loki closes his book, leaving it abandoned beside him. “What is this really about? You were such a spitfire a moment ago.”
You smile but it doesn’t reach your eyes. “Nothing, honest.” Nothing I didn’t already know.
You pick up Loki’s discarded book and hum at the title, one you recommended earlier that week.
“I think I just got stuck in my head.” Tilting your head, you pull your thoughts to the back of your mind, determined to figure out how to tell him later. “Besides, I can’t always be giving you shit. I’d become predictable and this little game we have wouldn’t be as much fun then.”
“You speak to me as if you’re afraid we’ll fall in love.”
If only you knew. You chuckle at his words, and flip to your favorite passage of the book, marking its by placing the slip cover edge in between the pages.
“Babe, I’m less afraid of drowning than you are.” Handing back the book, you smile, the quirk in your lips suggesting even more than your words. “Maybe, just think about it.”
You saunter out of the room; well aware you held his gaze with every step.
It had been a few days since your talk in the library with Loki. Small taskings and paper work taking up the majority of your time, leaving few moments for your mind to wander. During those days, Loki seemed to vanish, as he was known to do at times. General talk of ‘are they, aren’t they’ died down a bit, and for a moment you felt like you could breathe again.
You decide to make hot chocolate, not just a cup, but a thermos full, it had been a long week after all. Gathering up a few things, you make your way up to the roof patio for some much-needed calm. The city opens up before you and a smile gracing your lips, you’d never get tired of the view. You find your favorite lounge chair and watch the city from your new perch, getting lost in the twinkling lights and cool breeze. A simple thought echoes in your head; if only you could enjoy this moment with Loki.
Five floors down, Loki still can’t get you out of his thoughts. No matter how he tries to push you to the side, his concentration is always split. Pacing in his room, his thoughts dance erratically like children at play. Did he. . . love you? Well, there was love there, but real love? He was always there if you wanted. Hel, if you would have asked him to jump, he probably would have asked you when and how high without even thinking. He must. . . Does he love you? Yes. Of course, he did, it’s plain as day, it was the most obvious thing since. . . Full realization dawns on him, as bright and dazzling as a clear sunrise after a night on a stormy sea. What was he doing? He needed to find you, tell you, begin to show you – if only you’d let him. What if he was too late? Reaching out with his seiðr, he searches for you.
Back on the roof, wrapped up in a fuzzy blanket, you let yourself get lost in the peace of the view. A shiver runs down your back, as if someone’s whispered your name. Looking around you see no one on the patio with you. Shrugging, you pour yourself a cup of hot chocolate and begin to relax again blaming the breeze for stirring you.
A pull, a tug. Ever so faint, but there it is.
“There you are, love.” Loki smiles to himself and starts off towards the roof, and the confession he should have spoken long before.
Heart pushing him faster than ever before, he races out and up towards where you call to him. His footsteps echo in the stairwell after he’s already on the roof.
Your name falls from his lips like a hopeful prayer.
“Loki?” You sit up fully, surprised by his sudden arrival on the patio.
“The sage told me, long ago.” He starts, slowly moving towards you, as if afraid he’ll scare you off. “But I didn’t listen. Thought myself above them. How could one so sweet love one so twisted?”
‘Love?’ Concern knits your brow as you take in his words. “Are – are you alright? What’s going on?”
Standing in front of you, you notice his eyes are filled with unsplit tears.
“I should have done better by you.”
“What?”
“You are my everything. I’ve known, but I’ve been blind.” Loki falls to his knees before you, his hands resting on your knees. “Forgive me?”
“Forgive you for what, Loki? We – I mean, I – there’s no reason to – “
“I love you.”
Your breath catches in your throat, a hand goes to your lips, covering a slow smile that grows wide. You nod happily, taking his hands in yours.
“You’re not as evil as people think you are, Loki.”
“No. I’m much worse.” He pauses, kissing your knuckles. “I don’t deserve you, I can never –“
“Shhh.” You say, a smile on your lips, you lean forward, resting your forehead against his. “Tell me, tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway.”
“You, you love me?”
“I do.”
Loki chortles, tension in his shoulders dissipating. “We might be here for a while.”
“I don’t mind. I have all night, all eternity, if you want; it’s yours, as I am.”
“Mine?” Loki asks, his lips ghosting over yours.
“Yours.” You whisper just your lips touch his.