Work Text:
Inspired by this, for empressjung.
Using the palm of his hand, Changmin wipes away the condensation from the mirror, and regrets it immediately.
With his hair wet and sticking to his skull, his ears stick out even more than usual, like a fennec fox. Scowling, Changmin tries to focus on something else, but all he can notice is his mismatched lips, his wonky eyes, his too-long gangly limbs-
“Disgusting,” Changmin whispers at his reflection. Swallowing hard, he exits the bathroom, hugging his bathrobe to his body as closely as he can. From the living room, he can hear Yunho laughing and chatting, probably to somebody over the phone. Usually he would patter out keep the older man company until they retired for sleep, but tonight, Changmin wants nothing more than to hide under the covers.
In the past few years, he’d grown in leaps and bounds in raising his self-esteem. Changmin was no longer the shy little boy who had somehow stumbled into the entertainment industry and sung with his eyes fixed on the ground. But that didn’t stop moments like this- moments where he felt so repulsive he couldn’t even bear to look at his reflection. He wonders for a moment how Yunho can even share a bed with him each night.
“Changminnie?” Yunho voice is soft. Changmin hadn’t even noticed him entering the room. “Everything alright?”
Changmin curls up under the blankets. “Just tired.”
His voice hitches a miniscule amount, and he prays that Yunho doesn’t hear it. But of course the older man does, sitting down on the mattress beside him.
“Tell me,” Yunho says softly, trying to pull the blanket off him.
“Don’t,” Changmin begs, shaking off his hand. “Don’t touch me.”
“Why, baby, what’s wrong?” Yunho sounds a lot more concerned now, leaning over him and pressing a kiss to his (too-wide) forehead sticking out from under the blanket.
Changmin squeezes his eyes shut, hating himself for making the person he loved the most feel so concerned.
“Everything,” he blurts. “Everything’s wrong with me,” he gasps, tears slowly forcing their way out from behind his eyelids and soaking the pillow. “I’m disgusting.”
“Why would you say that?” Yunho murmurs. “You’re beautiful.”
“No,” Changmin whispers. “Don’t try to make this better, when there’s nothing about me that’s worth it!”
His shoulders shake with suppressed sobs, for every time somebody’s mentioned his weight, for every time somebody’s made cruel comments about him online.
“That’s not true,” Yunho says firmly, dragging the blanket away. Changmin wipes at his face hastily, trying to hide. But Yunho gently pries his hands away, and snuggles down on top of him, pinning him down. “You wanna know what’s so lovable about you?” he asks, smiling.
“I’m not a fluffy toy,” Changmin mutters, starting to feel relaxed under Yunho’s comforting weight, despite himself.
“Debateable,” Yunho chuckles. “But do you want to know what I love about you?”
“What?” Changmin mumbles.
“You have beautiful eyes,” Yunho says, kissing each of his eyelids.
“They’re uneven-”
“That was one of the very first things I noticed about you,” Yunho continues, ignoring him. “How your eyes would go mismatched when you smile, because your wonky eyes means you’re happy.”
Changmin feels his cheeks warm at that.
“I love how you can’t take a compliment from me without blushing,” Yunho teases, kissing his cheeks. “Even when there are fangirls who faint when they see you dance at our concerts, you still flush when I tell you how gorgeous you are.”
Changmin says nothing.
“And those cheekbones” Yunho purrs. “I could cut myself on them! So model-like.” He tilts his head to press a series of kisses along Changmin’s jaw, humming in appreciation. “Remember that time we met Dolce and Gabbanna? And they said they didn’t even realise you were a singer, just assumed you were one of the models straight off the catwalk, ‘cause you looked so damn good.”
Changmin can’t help but smile a little at the memory. He’d been awkward and flustered to hear such a compliment, but remembers how happy it’d made him feel.
“And your gorgeous, thick cock,” Yunho says, voice low and husky, sending shivers of arousal through his body. “I could spend days telling you how much I love it.”
“Oh my God, Yunho,” Changmin blushes furiously.
“What, you don’t believe me?” Yunho nips at a spot on Changmin’s neck, knowing full well how sensitive he was there. “I love how you split me open when I’m riding you, I love how you pound into me and I feel so full. I love it when I gag on your dick, I love how velvety soft you feel in my palms.”
“Okay, I think I get the point,” Changmin interrupts, distracted by the way Yunho is slowly grinding tiny circles on his crotch.
“No, I don’t think you do,” Yunho says, smiling widely. “I love your voice, how you’re the only one who can hit those high notes perfectly.”
“My voice sounds weird,” Changmin protests, but Yunho kisses him deeply, until he’s mewling.
“Your voice definitely isn’t weird when you make those sounds for me,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to Changmin’s throat.
Changmin gasps at the sensation, letting his eyes drift shut, content to just feel.
“And I love your sass,” Yunho continues. “How you have the funniest, wittiest retort to everything.”
“It’s kinda rude,” Changmin mutters. “I always get in trouble for not being careful with what I say.”
“I love it because you don’t hold back,” Yunho counters. “You’re honest and you don’t put up with bullshit from anyone.”
“I love how hard you work,” he continues. “Even after the first thing I ever said to you was to quit, you kept going and never gave up.”
“That was because I didn’t want to disappoint you,” Changmin admits in a whisper. “I couldn’t bear the thought of letting you down.”
“You’ve never disappointed me,” Yunho reassures him. “You never could.”
“I’m not perfect, hyung,” Changmin says.
“No, you’re not,” Yunho replies, and Changmin winces. “But nobody is perfect. You’re not a robot. And I don’t love you because you’re perfect. I love you because you’re you. I don’t want you any other way.”
Changmin blinks back his tears, heart full to bursting with the love he felt for the other man. “Thank you, hyung,” he murmurs.
“And I love your thoughtfulness!” Yunho keeps going, eyes wide. “Even when we’re both exhausted you always give me the travel pillow. And when we’re getting stalked by saesangs, you tell me, “Hyung, go, I’ll take care of this”, even after you used to see a therapist because of them.”
“It’s the least I can do for you,” Changmin smiles. “It’s worth it.”
“And you leave me those cute little notes in my pockets,” Yunho continues. “Reminding me to eat and look after myself properly, because you’re not around to make sure I’m okay.”
“Oh, and the way you cling to me when you’re sleeping,” Yunho chuckles. “Like a cute little koala bear. And then when you wake up, it’s terrifying because you look like you’re gonna hit me- if you haven’t already hit me in your sleep.”
“Sorry,” Changmin giggles.
“And your sexy ears!” Yunho exclaims.
“How the hell can you find ears sexy?” Changmin protests, laughing.
“Yours are,” Yunho insists. “Bigger ears mean I have more to nibble on!” He then proceeds to demonstrate this, biting on Changmin’s lobes and kissing the sensitive skin beneath.
“Stop, stop!” Changmin gasps, breathless with mirth.
“Oh, your laugh is gorgeous,” Yunho continues.
“Alright, you love everything about me, I get the point,” Changmin smiles, cheeks warm.
“Mm, you’re right,” Yunho grins. “Do you feel better?”
“Yeah,” Changmin admits, feeling a little silly for his earlier misery.
“Well, good, ‘cause I haven’t finished,” Yunho tells him. “I love your lips, how soft they are. I love that you know exactly how to use them to reduce me to a writhing mess.”
“Okay, enough already!”
“And your whole body! Where do I even start? It’s so long and lean with sexy muscle, and your strong arms all toned from carrying freaking dumbbells in your bag.”
“It’s good for exercise,” Changmin grumbles. “I didn’t tell manager-shi he had to carry it.”
“Oh and your cute little bubble butt,” Yunho chirps brightly. “So round and spankable, you have no idea how much I love the sight of those globes spread wide open for me.”
“Pervert,” Changmin giggles. “Are you done?”
“Nowhere near,” Yunho declares. “I love how goofy and excited you get when you play with Legos. How you act like such a mature adult but you not-so-secretly love all the Disney films and demand for plushies after you watch them.” He grabs Toothless, their dragon plushie, as evidence, wriggling it around.
“Don’t hurt him,” Changmin scolds. Yunho laughs, putting the toy down.
“I love every inch of you, from the tips of your silky soft hair, to the ends of your cute toes,” Yunho smiles. “And I love-”
Changmin grabs his face, bringing down Yunho’s lips to meet his own. His kiss is fierce with all the love he has for the older man. Yunho makes a little sound at the back of his throat, cradling Changmin’s head in his hands.
“I love you too,” Changmin breathes as they part for air. “From your stupid dorky laugh to the way you hold me in your arms. I love you, Yunho.”
“I love you, too,” Yunho murmurs, bending down to kiss him again, but Changmin pulls back, grinning.
“So, weren’t you saying how much you love my cock?” he asks, an eyebrow raised. “I’m not sure I heard that correctly.”
“Oh, I do,” Yunho enthuses. He smirks a little. “Would you like me to prove it?”
Changmin bites at Yunho’s plump lower lip. “Mm, I love those luscious lips of yours,” he gasps as Yunho kisses a path down his chest.
“Oh you’ll love it even more in just a moment,” Yunho promises, and promptly gets to work.
~
In the aftermath, they lay naked and panting, sweat cooling off their bodies.
“I love you,” he murmurs again, just because he could.
His soulmate smiles in response. “I love you too.”
They lay tangled within each other on the bed, a seamless fit.