Chapter Text
Sam and Dean find themselves standing in front of a bright yellow background. There is a waist high brick wall placed on the set. They're in their own clothes; no costumes and no other "characters" can be seen. Dean is holding a pie in one hand and a fork in the other. He takes a closer look at the pie, trying to decide what kind it is; it's pecan. Sam looks around trying to figure out where they've been sent to. "Ok, so now where are we?" Sam asks Dean under his breath.
"Why are you asking me? I've been with you the whole time."
"Well, you watch more TV than I do, so I figured you'd know."
Dean gives his brother a look, unsure if that was an insult or not. Before he has the chance to decide, music starts. A tune almost everyone who has ever watched TV as a child will recognize. The Sesame Street theme. Why the Trickster has sent them to Sesame Street they don't know, but if playing their part means Dean gets pie, he's all for it. Sam is just glad he isn't endorsing herpes cream.
Turning towards the "audience" Sam smiles and begins. "Uh hi. My name is Sam, and this is my brother," Sam turns to Dean, expecting him to introduce himself, only to find Dean's cheeks almost bulging. The pie in his hand already missing a large chunk. Face stuffed, Dean tries to swallow, but his mouth is far too full to do so quickly. Sam rolls his eyes, looks back at the audience, and continues on "His name is Dean. Today we are here to talk about the word of the day: empathy. Empathy is when you understand how another person is feeling, because you've felt that way yourself."
Sam looks again at Dean, who is still chewing. Seeing this will take just a bit longer, he looks back at the audience. "For example, I know Dean's favorite food is pie. I also have a favorite food. While I would never do so, I can empathize with why he took such a grotesquely sized bite." He looks back at his brother, who's just finished.
Unfazed by his younger brother's insult, Dean begins, "Thanks, Sammy. Sometimes I just can't help myself. When I have a plate of the best food ever, I just have to dig in. It's kinda like..." Dean is interrupted by a familiar blue figure bouncing onto set along top the brick wall.
"Oh, oh. Me heard you have plate of cookies. Can me have one?" asks Cookie Monster.
Both brothers turn to the blue fluff ball. Dean looks slightly disturbed; both at being interrupted and there being a talking blue puppet. Sam on the other hand is practically vibrating with excitement. He taps Dean in excitement "That's Cookie Monster."
"Yeah Sam, I noticed." Dean is unimpressed and confused by his younger brother's behavior.
"You're Cookie Monster," Sam says to the puppet, ignoring his older brother's disinterest. "You were my favorite when I was growing up." Sam then reaches out his hand, which completely dwarfs the puppet's, and begins to shake.
"Oh, yeah. You used to jump up and down when he came on." Dean recalls a particularly fond memory of baby Sammy toddling away from him in a diaper and shirt screaming "Oookie Mon". Suddenly Dean looks at the Audience. "I just met one of my favorite characters, or at least I thought I did, so I can empathize with Sammy and how he's feeling right now."
" So.... can me has cookie or not?" asks Cookie Monster, staring longingly at the plate in Dean's hand.
Sam steals the plate and lowers it for the puppet to see, "Oh sorry, this is pie. Not cookies."
Cookie Monster's excitement fades into confusion and then disappointment, "But he said he had cookies." Dean snatches back the plate and gives his brother a dirty look. Sam hardly notices, trying to comfort his childhood idol. "He lied," grumbles the puppet.
Dean does not like being called a liar. Especially when he when he's being honest. "Whoa, I did not lie. I said I have a plate of the best food in the world."
Cookie Monster is confused for a moment then a sudden look of enlightenment "Oh, oh! Me think you confused. Cookie is best food. Pie is not cookie."
"Ummm, excuse you. I am not confused. I said I have the best food in the world and that is not cookies. It's pie."
"No, cookie is best."
Dean glares down at the little monster, "Uh... No, it's definitely pie." As if to prove his point he aggressively takes a human sized bite of pie. "Mmmmm," he says, scrunching up his face almost as if sticking his tongue out.
"No, it cookies."
Dean almost chokes trying to swallow his mouthful then bends forward so he is in the puppets space. "No, pie."
Cookie Monster stares down the hunter, "Cookie."
"Pie."
"Cookie!"
"Pie!"
"COOKIES!" the puppet yells, shaking in anger.
"Ok guys, enough," Sam interrupts trying to avoid any further escalation. He's eyeing the way Dean is now holding his fork in a stabbing position. "I think it's time for a little empathy."
"What you mean?" Asks Cookie Monster, looking at Sam. Dean begins to sullenly eat more of his pie.
"Well, Cookie Monster, cookies are your favorite food, right?" The puppet vigorously nods his head. "Well, Dean's favorite food is pie. So, when he said pie is the best food he wasn't lying, because for him it is the best food."
"Ok, me need think about this," he says hesitantly.
Sam nods his head in understanding and turns towards his brother. Dean is half way done with his pie. Sam is disgusted, but not surprised. "Now Dean, pie is your favorite food in the world. Cookie Monster loves cookies...." he stops. Dean is clearly unimpressed and doesn't even look up from his pie. Sam forgot for a moment that his older brother is the most emotionally constipated person on the planet. Except for one thing. "He loves cookies like you love the Impala." Dean stops his fork midway to his mouth. Sam, knowing his argument has hit home, continues. "How would you react if some person said the Impala wasn't the best car ever and that you were wrong for thinking it is?"
"Violently," is his answer. "And I don't think Baby's the best. She is."
"Uh, Dean, this is a children's program. Cool it before the Trickster gets upset, you're not playing the part," Sam warns under his breath.
Remembering all too vividly the sympathy pains of watching Sam being whacked in the nuts, Dean composed himself. "I mean gee Sammy when you put it that way, I really can understand Cookie Monster's feelings. Thank you for helping me Empathize with him." It's not entirely sincere, but for the purposes of following the script it works.
Something tugs at Sam's jeans and he looks down. "Ok, me think me understand now. Cookie is me favorite food. That mean it best food to me. Dean favorite food pie, that mean it best food to him. He not think cookie bad, just love pie like me love cookie" The puppet looks at Sam expectantly.
"Yeah, that's exactly what empathy is!" Sam take a moment to be proud of a job well done. He notices though that his favorite Sesame Street character is not so happy. "What's wrong little guy?" He bends down to put his gigantic arm around the downcast puppet.
"Me.... me no get cookie," the blue monster answers forlornly.
Here it was, the moment Sam had been secretly waiting for. Every skit with Cookie Monster ends with the puppet eating at least one cookie. Part of his love for Cookie Monster was the dream of sharing a plate of cookies with his 2 earliest childhood heroes. Now this is a secret. Practically being raised by his big brother rather than his father kind of skewed his perception as a child. So, even upon pain of torture and death, Sam would not admit that his first hero is actually Dean. At the age of 4, he invented a very special cookie to share with his pie loving brother and the Cookie Monster. He found out later in life that he was not the only one to think of the special cookies; other people had even made real recipes! He needed those cookies right now, before the episode ended. It would just make the whole lesson perfect.
Suddenly the hand not comforting Cookie Monster had a tray of something behind his back and in the same way he just knew the lines for a show, he knew that he had those cookies. "Hey Dean, get over here."
"Why?"
"Because."
"I'm not hugging a puppet."
"Dean you don't have to hug anyone. Just get over here."
"I don't wanna," the older brother said petulantly as he took another bite of pie.
Sam sighed, exasperated. Luckily the decades of dealing with his brother had taught him exactly how to manipulate Dean. Well at least usually. "Ok, but then you won't get any."
"Any what?"
Sam dramatically reveals the tray he had behind his back, "These fresh apple pie cookies."
Cookie Monster immediately perks up and makes to grab the plate. Sam anticipating this, moves the plate out of reach of puppets short arms. "Cookie Monster, I know you know better than that. You have to share. These aren't just for you."
Moving the tray out of reach of the puppet unfortunately had the side effect of putting them in perfect reaching distance of Dean, who had moved towards his brother as fast as his bow legs could carry him. Sam quickly switched the plate to his other hand, but as far above his head as he could. This effectively used his superior height keep the plate out of both pairs of greedy hands. "Ok seriously both of you. This plate is to share. There's enough for all of us."
Dean and Cookie Monster both look slightly ashamed. Sensing it was now safe, Sam lowered the plate.
"I want you to try them first so you may each have one." Dean grabs a cookie and Sam hands one to the puppet, keeping the plate just out of reach, not trusting the little monster.
Cookie Monster immediately shoves the whole thing in, chewing with his mouth open, clearly enjoying his cookie. Dean also shoves the whole thing in, but he at least chews with his mouth closed. Both nod their heads in approval.
"These are good, Sammy. But where did these even come from?"
"I don't even know. I just really needed them for the show and suddenly I had them," Sam explains.
Dean shrugs and moves to reach for another. It is at this moment that Sam notices Dean's no longer holding the pie plate. "Hey, what happened to your pie?"
"Uh, I ate it." Sam smacks his brothers hand away from the cookie tray. "Hey!"
"You ate an entire pie. In less than 10 minutes!"
"Yeah." Sam keeps staring at him, disgusted. "It was a small pie." Sam just looks even more disappointed. "And it was really thin."
Cookie Monster stares at the cookie plate.
"It was at least a seven-inch pan."
"Yeah and a regular size pie is 10 inches, so it was small."
"Can me have another cookie." Sam looks at Cookie Monster "Please."
He lowers the tray and looks back to his brother. "How do you still have room?"
"Always room for pie Sam" he answers and reaches for the plate again.
"Really Dean, haven't you had enough?"
Dean stops and stares down his brother. "Shut up. I'm tired of you constantly judging my food choices. And I would think you would want me to eat more fruit. Fruit's healthy."
"It's not that you're eating pie, it's how much of it you just ate. Also, any health benefits from the apples are lost with all the sugar. Same with the pecans."
Dean gestures at the plate of cookies. "I don't see you complaining about Cookie Monster eating almost the whole plate."
Sam turns to the plate. It's empty. Cookie Monster is chomping on the last cookie, blue fur face covered in crumbs and apple filling. "Oh my God!" He just stares in disbelief. "The whole plate!" Cookie Monster just nods his head, looking ashamed. "You ate the entire plate!"
Still upset with his brother Dean goes on the defensive "Oh so now you're harping on Cookie Monster about portion control. He's Cookie Monster, eating cookies is what he does."
Cookie Monster chimes in "Me tired of people complaining about how me eat ca-uh cookies."
"Yeah Cookie Monster, you tell him." Dean is ticked with all of Sam's harping and judging stares over the last few minutes. They'd skipped dinner to get to the warehouse ASAP and he had been getting hangry before the pie.
"What the heck Dean?"
"What I thought you wanted us to empathize with each other. Well here we are, empathizing over our love for desert and how some people just don't understand it."
Dean's tone is kind of smug, turning Sam's words on himself.
Sam says something quietly, but Dean doesn't here it over his inner monologue and ego stroking. "What was that Sam."
"I just wanted one."
All self-righteous indignation leaves Dean. A memory of toddler Sammy crying because Dean had found and eaten a cookie, secretly hoarded to share with Ookie Mon. Dean didn't feel all that guilty then (he was like seven), but adult Dean feels like crap. Not good with words, or willing to apologize, he thought of how he could make it up to his little brother. Adult Sam, being a health nut, didn't really like cookies or pie. His favorite dessert, if you could call it that, apple slices dipped in peanut butter. He'd get him some as soon as they got out of this.
Then again, maybe he didn't have to wait. He thought about just how much he really wanted apple slices and a jar of peanut butter. A sudden weight in both hands made him look down. "Awesome." Sure enough, one hand had red apple slices on a plate and the other a jar of Jiff creamy, the only kind of peanut butter worth eating. "Hey Sam, what about this?" he asks, lifting everything into view. Sam looks at what Dean is holding and his eyes light up. Dean knows he did right.
"What that?" Cookie Monster asks confused.
"Well Cookie Monster, that's my favorite food. Apple slices and peanut butter." Sam answers. Well almost his favorite. For it to be perfect the apples would be Granny Smith. The tangy of the Granny Smith's just worked better with the sweetness of the peanut butter, but Dean never really paid attention to apples unless they were in a pie. "Hey, do you guys want to share with me?"
"That sounds great Sammy!" Dean says, over enthusiastic smile on his face.
Cookie Monster just kind of looks shocked, then shakes his head. "Ummm... no, me full from cookies."
Sam shoulders slump and his smile falters. Dean notices. Big brother mode activated. He places the apple slices and peanut butter on the wall. "Hey Cookie Monster, let's talk." He leans down towards the little monster and whispers in his ear so quietly Sam can't hear. After a few moments of heated whispering, guilty looks, and nodding. Dean stands back up.
"Ok, me try," says Cookie Monster, like he just agreed to try foot fungus. Sam is automatically suspicious.
"Deeeaan, what did you say to Cookie Monster?"
"I uh, just reminded him he ate all the cookies we were supposed to share before you got any."
Sam knows there was more to it, but let's it go. He knows he can't keep dragging this out. They haven't stayed in a show for more than a few minutes and he really wants to eat some apple. "Whatever." Sam grabs an apple slice, dips it in the peanut butter and hands it to Cookie Monster. Dean already grabbed his own slice and dips it. He digs it deep into the peanut butter and struggles a little to get it out. There's almost more peanut butter than apple. Sam just blinks and grabs his own apple slice.
The brothers eat their slices at the same time. For once Sam finishes his first. Mostly because Dean is still trying to chew the almost 1/4 cup of peanut butter he shoved in his mouth. Sam dips a second slice in the jar when he notices Cookie Monster still hasn't taken a bite. Instead he's looking at his slice like it's grown legs. The puppet, seeing he's been caught, hesitantly takes the smallest bite he can, getting more peanut butter on his fur than in his mouth. Sam knows this is probably the best he's going to get and takes a bite of his second slice.
"You know," Dean starts between licking the remaining peanut butter off his fingers,” As much as being stuck here blows, I can't fault the room service." A look a mischief crosses his sticky face, "Kinda makes me wonder what the limit on this thing is." Before he gets the chance to test anything Cookie Monster snaps his furry fingers.
The Channel Changes.....