Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“All the world will be your enemy, Prince of a Thousand Enemies.

And when they catch you, they will kill you.

But first, they must catch you; digger, listener, runner, Prince with the swift warning.

Be cunning and full of tricks, and your people will never be destroyed.”

Silver eyes are have closed forever to the human world, and humans rejoice.

They run down the Mounds, yelling the good news. They get together and toast to death. They sing songs of victory, for the Yiling Patriarch is dead.

Silver eyes have closed forever, and some humans do not rejoice.

They yell and throw in anger, calling out for people who aren’t there anymore. They close their eyes and mourn quietly, for noise is forbidden. They cry and call out for a brother, a parent, a lover.

Wei Wuxian doesn’t know of this.

He is too busy being reborn.

Silver eyes have closed forever to the human world, but black eyes open to the dim light of a burrow. He’s snuggly pressed against a fast beating heart, the smell of earth and vines and milk. Someone licks away his anxiety and hums.

He opens his eyes and looks up. He sees a rabbit.

He recognizes her, somehow. He knows she’s mother.

It’s been very long since he’s had a mother. She’s looking warmly at him, her nose twitching as she studies him closely.

“Hello, little one.” She says, wind through the trees, her voice.

He blinks and she purrs.

“Frithrah, Hysil!” Another voice says, and Wei Ying turns his head around, ears rising to the sound sloppily. “Look at his fur! He’s beautiful!”

“He is.” Mother, Hysil, nuzzles his face lovingly. Wei Ying would very much like to ask what’s going on, but he cannot say a word. He doesn’t know this language. His throat makes an unhappy whine, to which his mother coos and licks his face. 

“Is it as you saw?” Someone else asks. Wei Ying can see other rabbits outside of the room (is it a room, though?). They are huddled, peering inside their little hiding place with bright, curious eyes.

“You can see it in his eyes.” Mother says proudly, and Wei Ying looks up to her again. He likes watching her. Her soft gray fur smells like home and warms him. “This one is no ordinary rabbit.”

‘Am I a rabbit?’ Wei Ying wants to ask. Last time he checked he was a man. A murderer. A story to scare children into being good. Rabbits are nice. They’re cute and fluffy and everyone, even Lan Zhan, likes them!

He is definitely not a rabbit.

But, alas, he tries to stand, and it is four little legs that support him. Two elongated ears that twitch to his new mother’s laugh as he shakes and trembles.

“Rabbit.” He manages to repeat, and mother nods solemnly. This is the first word he ever says in this language.

“A rabbit now.”

“Now?” Someone asks, but they’re not given any attention.

“What is his name?”

Mother hums in thought.

“Hyinlé.” She decides. “The shine of the moon.” The rabbits murmur their opinions but dare not say them louder. It is not their place. But what a strange name has Hysil, shine of the outdoors, seer of the Yiling Warren, chosen for her kit!

Wei Wuxian, Hyinlé, doesn’t know this yet, but his name also means ‘the shine of death’.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It is clear to all that Hyinlé is not a regular kit.

His words, when spoken, are uncertain, when he stands, he trembles; he is even more shambling than other baby bunnies, which is worrying. He should be much more agile by now. Hysil seems unbothered.

“He is not used to this,” she says, looking kindly at her first kit as he walks carefully in the burrow. “Give him time. He’ll catch up. He’s a fighter.”

No one will ever doubt Hysil. She has saved them from drought and flood, from sickness and elil. She is highly respected and so, her child must be so, as well.

But when Hyinlé’s eyes meet yours, you’ll see what Hysil meant: those are not a rabbit’s eyes. They are too full of something.

Chapter Text

The black beauty of the Yiling Warren grows every day stronger, faster, brighter.

Hysil was right, as always. Her kit has caught up and surpassed the other ones that were born this spring.

 He races, fights, studies, learns. He wins like he doesn’t know how to lose. He is charming and a grand storyteller, weaving pictures of the tales no rabbit has heard before. Tales of gods other that Frith, to the horror of the eldest rabbits; tales of men, put simply in Lapine words, for easier understanding.

It is like this that they begin to understand Hyinlé’s mind.  

“And then I told Jiang Cheng to cut it out, but we were caught by one of the elders! Hahaha!” As he speaks, Hyinlé buzzes with energy, twitching with excitement, remembering in his skin the thrill of the chase.

“Hyinléroo.” The elders are frowning as he entertains the youngest kits. The story itself is fine, nothing to worry about, but he is speaking as if he was there, and that is not possible: Hyinlé has lived with them since he was born, not two months ago. He is still young, still stuck to his mother, still learning, and yet he speaks as if he was an adult. “Who is this Ji- Jia- Jia-“ The elder tries to say the name but it stays inside his mouth. He cannot pronounce it. His teeth are in the way.

“Jiang Cheng?” Hyinlé cocks his head like he hasn’t just said a human name, in a fluency no Lapine could ever. “My brother, of course.”

“You have no brothers, kit.” A doe says, and Hyinlé stills.

A beat passes.

“Ah, that is right.” He speaks, so softly they barely hear him. “I am a rabbit.” He looks back at them. “How silly of me! Jiang Cheng is a human lord that lives far from here, in a lotus pond. I do not know him.” He looks lost. He seems to be trying to convince himself.

Another older buck takes pity of him.

“Does this human lord you speak so highly of have a Lapine name we can call him with?”

Hyinlé thinks for a little while.

“His name is ‘Clear River’,” he muses out loud for them. “But, as he is a lord now, and we are not close, I shouldn’t call him so casually.” The elders look at each other: Hyinlé seems very sad, suddenly, and no one likes that. What kind of situation is Hyinlé in? Is he a seer, like his mother? He must be, to know so much about human laws and lords. “Zorn-Hrair-Rah.” He tells them, at last.

The mood thickens even more: Hyinlé has named this lord “Prince of a Thousand Sorrows.”

One of the littlest ones, a light brown kit named Willow, clears his throat.

“Hyinléroo, please tell another!”

That is enough to distract the black rabbit.

“Of course, of course!” He chirps. “Let’s stick with Lapine stories, now, shall we? Have you ever heard of the time El-Ahrairah-“ His voice is lost in the wind as the elders walk away. They wish to speak to Hysil as soon as possible.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Hysil has always been straightforward with her answers. She’s not a doe who likes to make messes or confound the minds of her warren. What she sees, she’s always told.

This time it is no exception.

“My kit is favored of Frith himself.” She says, proudly.

“Frith has no favorites.” A buck reminds her, but she shakes her head.

“He does, and it is well deserved. My kit,” she sighs. “He lived a harsh past life.”

“A past life?”

“He died,” Hyinlé says, surprising everyone. “He fell to wounds and became stiff and cold. The smell of death clung to him as it does us. But, by Frith, he was given new life. He was given to us as a gift, for we couldn’t appreciate him enough as he lived before.”

“What ever do you mean?” This buck is not like the others: Narnthlay-Rah is leader of the warren. He is beautiful and strong; his rabbits respect him and his Owsla. He, too, is curious about Hyinlé’s nature. “You say he was human, but, if so, what is to be appreciated? What do we owe to humans? Is it not enough that they hunt us? They are elil, too. We do not thank elil.” 

“In this you are right, Narnthlayroo.” She calls him affectionately. She is older than most rabbits, already on her third year. “But you do not know the whole story, as I did not. Is it not true that up until last spring, it was that this ground gave us food? Frith, in his kindness, lead us here, and yet we starved.

“But it changed overnight, and didn’t we all rejoice? We celebrated under His light and ate until we were full. We have led a good life. But we assumed it was Frith’s own actions and not the actions done by someone in His name. My Hyinlé called then ‘No-Envies’, Prince of the Mountain of Death Smell, brought his kin here, and created a Sil-Warren, as humans do. They worked the earth in the human way, and it was fruitful for them and us. His kindness to the ground and his kin saved us all.” She speaks passionately. The other rabbits listen with their ears straight. “But then he died. And his kin were slain, and his Sil-Warren, destroyed. This place will give fruit no more. Not without them.”

“Why didn’t they fight? If Hyinlé was half the rabbit he is now, he would have fought, and his warren would have followed.” Blossom is a brave doe and the leader of the warren’s Owsla. She has just become a mother herself: Willow is her pride and joy; nothing stops her from protecting the ones in her responsibility.

“They were not a fighting Warren and they had no Owsla.” Rabbits gasp around them. “They were the sick and old, who came to No-Envies in search of a home. No-Envies fought their battles alone. And won them.” More gasps. “No-Envies died without being properly thanked for his life. It is our Frith-given job to appreciate him. And follow him.”

Narnthlay-Rah twitches nervously.

“You say this? I am not yet dead.”

“And you are still strong.” The doe agrees. “But your second year in halfway, and we know not all the future holds. But we have an advantage: Hyinlé is No-Envies. A good, just leader who cares for his kin. He knows things we do not, like the human’s life and their secrets. It is only logical that we follow.”

“And of the food scarcity?”

“We will leave for another place soon before the rains come.” She assures her leader.

“When were you going to tell me?”

“As soon as the kits grew enough. They are not yet ready for travel.”

“Have you seen where we should go?”

Hysil shakes her head no. “That was not revealed, but I know of a place. My grandmother lived there as a kit before this warren came together. It was called Hrair Hain.” Some rabbits nodded in comprehension and trembled in excitement.

“The place of Thousand Songs! Blessed with food! No elil to reach it!”

“Ah, but is it real? It is so far away!”

“No more than three moons,” Hysil says. “And it is worth the trip. Narnthlay-Rah, it is our best option.” Somehow, this undercover meeting to know about Hyinlé’s life became a council reunion.

“Mh.” Narnthlay nods. “It is. But we are to leave as soon as possible. In a week’s time.” He decides.

Some parents protest.

“Teach your kits how to hold on, then.” He admonishes, whiskers trembling in indignation. “Teach them of survival, for the trip will be hard.” The crowd begins to thin out as rabbits walk out to get their kits. These classes must be done immediately. When they are all gone, Narnthlay-Rah speaks again.

“How long have you known?”

“Two nights.”

“It pains you.” It is not a question. Narnthlay knows Hysil very well; they have been friends for so long and seeing through her words to see her hurt by the visions is never pleasant.

“My poor, poor kit.” She chokes out. “He has suffered too much.”

“Hysil…”

“He was left for dead, more than once. His parents died, and then so did the warren who took him in. This Jia-, Jia-,” she tries to say it but fails. “This Hrair-Zorn he speaks about was his brother in all but blood. They were raised together. And yet, he was the one to lead the attack at him. Never before have I wished not to see. Not to know.” She whimpers. “I just wish him to be happy, to lead a long life. Full three years with a full stomach and a full burrow. Is it too wrong of me? I didn’t tell you because I knew we’d leave. And you’ll take him in, I know you.”

She is right. Narnthlay-Rah’s idea is to teach Hyinlé all he knows about leading a warren, to prepare him. Hysil has told him now that Hyinlé is and has been their hope; he needs to be ready and understand how rabbits work.

They say nothing more; they both know what they will do.

Chapter Text

The trip is, by no means, an easy one.

Hyinlé is a fast learner, an unstoppable force as he races through unused paths, leading the Warren away from humans under the careful watch of Narnthlay.

“Always alert, Hyinléroo.” He says constantly. “A second is the difference between life and death.”

Hyinlé nods every time he is told, his eyes serious. He is usually so carefree, and it pains Narnthlay to cut his joy. It took some convincing to make Hyinlé agree to this special training. He didn’t want to be taught. He shivered and trembled and whimpered.

“I’ve failed, more than once.” He said. “I cannot do that again.”

“You will not be alone, this time.” Hysil reminded him, nibbling lovingly at his face. “You have the full support of the warren. This is not your responsibility yet. You have time to learn.”

Narnthlay was also good to him. It is impossible not to love him. Hyinlé gives his all, again and again, never doubting and braver than any other rabbit Narnthlay has ever met. The best example is the tale of how Hyinlé, Eluelil, Enemy of The Enemies, fought a group of humans as the warren escaped under the careful eyes of Willow.

They tell it like this:

“It was ni-Frith and everyone’s step was still light and quick. The Yiling Warren had been traveling for a full moon but they were excited about their destination, and so, they were not tired yet. Hyinlé and his dearest Willow were looking for food, when Hyinlé, knowledgeable in the ways of humans, recognized a trap before Willow could step on it. Hyinlé sent Willow back to the group with instructions for an alternate path.

As Willow raced, Hyinlé saw the three Elil: Humans. They carried with them weapons and hunger in their eyes burned. Even so, Hyinlé knew that if he sat there paralyzed his kin would die, so he made a choice: he made noise and raced beside them. When the humans took notice of him, they tried to catch him, and they almost did! As Hyinlé jumped, they grazed his ears and fur, almost caught his legs, more than once, but Hyinlé had always been quick and cunning, made in the image of El-Ahrairah! He moved them away from the path he had told Willow to follow and made them chase him until the moon was high.

Then, Inlé-blessed, he became one with the shadows and raced back to his warren, who were all safe and sound, waiting for him to return glorious, and he did! He found himself in celebration and named Willow his ‘sworn brother’ in the human way and promised him he would make him Leader of his Owsla when he became Prince of the Warren. And so, he did!

All hail Hyinlé, Eluelil!” 

In truth, it had not been as glorious. It had been a bunch of good luck shots that Wei Ying attributed to Frith and his kindness, that allowed him to kick a human in the face as he jumped around. He had been terrified: if they caught him, they would skin him and eat him. He had fallen to that fate before and never wished to go through that again.

They had chased him because they were pissed that he had scratched their faces. In luck, they were not cultivators, but simple farmers coming back from a trip. Wei Ying found out that he could still understand the human tongue when Willow and the rest of his kin could not. He almost wished to ask them about life out from the forest: What was the fate of Jiang Cheng? Of the Jin heir, RuLan? What was the fate of Han Guan-Jun? Were they happy he was gone?

Were the people happy?

He waited until he was back with his warren, and in the safe company of his mother, to shed tears. It was much later than kits usually stayed with their mothers, but she was kind enough to lick them away and not ask him why he cried. She just stayed and soothed him.  

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Wei Ying likes Narnthlay-Rah. A lot.

He reminds him of Lan QiRen if Lan QiRen had liked him at any given moment. He is strict and serious, but he does it for a good reason. He is a good teacher, firm in his method, but he does not punish. Or maybe it is that Wei Ying is no longer the rebellious youth he was when he was under Lan QiRen’s care. He finds himself wondering if Lan QiRen would approve of this new Wei WuXian.

All in all, the lessons are not hard. There are very few rules here, but they must be followed: stay alert, love your warren, don’t take more than you need. He is allowed to play around with Willow and the other kits, and in return, he keeps watch and shares with them the paths away from the humans. It’s alright, he thinks. Even if he were still human, he would avoid them too.

Wei Ying also loves Hysil, mother. He does not like the Lapine word for mother: Marli. It also means ‘doe’, and he doesn’t like that it implies that only does can be mothers. After all, wasn’t he A-Yuan’s mother? Ah, that had been a fun day! He liked remembering it as he napped with his peers.

He once told Willow this. He had laughed so much at Willow’s confused face!

“Of course I was a mother!” He had insisted. “His name was ‘To long for’, and he was my son!”

“But you were a buck!”

“I was! Hahahaha! Willow, you should see yourself! Ah, it’s too funny!” He jumped around his friend, in a great mood.

“Fine!” Willow conceded, twitching his whiskers in annoyance. “Then, who was the doe, if not you?”

“No doe!”

“There had to be a doe!”

“Not for me! I had my kit with another buck!”

“You  couldn’t have!”

“Prove it.” Wei Ying stilled in front of his friend. “What do you know of humans? Maybe human bucks can birth kits too!”

Willow seemed to understand Wei Ying was playing around but could not defend himself. He opted to ask more questions.

“Then who was the other buck?”

“Mh? Oh! A great man!” Wei Ying’s ears shot up in excitement. “Ah, he was beautiful! Like a piece of scratched rock!”

“A what?”

Wei Ying stilled, then laughed.

“I guess there is no Lapine translation! Listen, Willow, humans adore beings like Frith, yes?”

“Yes.” He had told them this in his stories, of how the moon came to be, of how other animals came to exist, on how to achieve eternal life.

“They scratch rocks to make them look like them! These pictures are beautiful! The buck who was the father of my kit was like that! Fur dark like the night but eyes the same color of the sun!”

“And was he a good father?”

“He was a good man.” Wei Ying went quiet. Around the rabbits, the wind ruffled the leaves in the trees above. “He was better than I was.”

“Hyinlé-“ Willow recognized the look in his friend’s face. He was suddenly so very sad, pushed away from a life so different. Hyinlé’s past life was not a secret in the warren, but everyone spoke little of it because it saddened their pride and joy. “Come.” He decided to say. “Let us join everyone.”

“Mn.” Wei Ying shook the dust of his fur. “I’ll race you!” He regained his good mood.

They ran back, playing and pushing all the way.

. . . . . .  . . . . . . . . . . . . .

When they finally reached Hrair Hain, the warren had gone through plenty of changes.

The kits were all grown now, some had their chosen mates, and were readying for kits. Some of the adults had also left them, among them, Narnthlay-Rah. He became part of the Black Rabbit’s Owsla after they crossed a river, and he fell inside. He managed to swim to the banks, but the cold and water had already done damage. They mourned him under a moonless sky, and in the morning, as Frith rose, they resumed their trip with a new leader: Hyinlé-Rah, with Willow as his right hand (paw? Wei Ying had no idea if this words changed).

He led them straight and quick, using every last trick up his metaphorical sleeve to ensure no more deaths. They followed him faithfully, and they were brought to a land of green and fresh shadows. They busied themselves with digging a new burrow and delaying new responsibilities, starting with his own Owsla with Willow as a leader. Blossom was proud, staring at her kit with nothing but love.

It was good.

And it got better as they ran into rabbits from the warren of Hrair Hain.

It had been early in the morning, the warren starting their activities along with the sun.

Willow was the one who raced into the burrow to drag Wei Ying out. They ran together, accompanied by Hysil, whose grandmother came from the warren of a Thousand Songs and would play as a diplomat.

They met a small group, no more than four grey, and brown rabbits.

When they saw Wei Ying running towards them, they became alert and stressed. As they halted, the rabbit who seemed in charge spoke in hushed tones.

“Are you the Black Rabbit of Death?”

Wei Ying did not laugh. He knew this was not a matter to be joked about, not like when he was a human.

“I am not, though I was blessed with night fur.” His mother stood proudly beside him. “I am Hyinlé-Rah, Eluil, we come from the Mountain of Death Smell. We seek shelter from food scarcity.”

“Why here?”

“My marli’s mother’s mother was born in Hrair Hain.” He nodded in his mother’s direction.

She nodded.

“Her name was Redwood, born from the first rabbits in Hrair Hain.” She stated. “I am Hysil, seer of the Yiling Warren.”

“And this is Willow.” Wei Ying introduced. “Leader of my Owsla.” Willow saluted with a bow of his head.

“Well-met, then, Hyinlé-Rah, Eluil, youngest heir of Hrair Hain.” The rabbit said. “You and your kin are welcomed home.”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

What could have been weeks of pain and starvation in Yiling became fruitful summer in Hrair Hain for all the rabbits. They filled their stomachs with flayrah: lettuce, flowers, grass. Couples mated and gave birth to new kits for the warren, each one stronger than the last. There were no elil, no death, no suffering. This place, Wei Ying, constantly thought, was a paradise. A castle in a cloud.

‘Had I lived here when I was human,’ he said to himself. ‘I would have certainly been saved.’

He thought this for months, until his mother died.

She was not in pain, which eased his guilt. She was old, one of the eldest in their group, and the trip had taken a toll on her.

One evening, she lied down in soft grass. Wei Ying noticed something was amiss and hopped over to her.

“Mother?” He nibbled at her cheek.

“Mn? Ah, my kit.” She purred. “My beautiful, beautiful Hyinlé. How lucky I was to have you.”

“Mother?”

“I am to go to the Black Rabbit soon. I shall serve him in his Owsla.” Wei Ying shivered.

“Mother-“

“It is alright, my little one.” She reminisced of the little bundle of joy that had been born from her. How much time seemed to have passed! “He comes for all of us, and when he comes you must follow. It is simply my time.” He pressed himself to her.

“Mother, I- Thank you.” He closed his eyes into her fur. She had raised him, comforted him, loved him as his first mother had. He owed her so much and loved her even more. And yet, not even as a human could he have been able to save her.

He realized, then, this was the first time he saw someone die peacefully.

“Ah, my little one, thank you. You have brought us great joy, and you have made me proud. Be happy, No-Envies.” She whispered. “Be strong, Shine of the Moon. Be fierce, Enemy of The Enemy. Those of us who love you and have stopped running, stay with you until your time comes.” She pressed her forehead to his side for a last time, then she let go. It was as if she had fallen asleep.

He stayed still until he was certain he could no longer hear her racing heartbeat.

“My heart has joined the Thousand,” he chanted in the Lapine manner, his voice muffled on her fur. “For my friend stopped running today.”

He did not know how much time had passed when he finally stood straight, but the sun had moved a long way. A white figure in his far right called his attention. He was startled by it and jumped backward. A human! Elil! He should run, but he was still as death. Completely tharned.

He had been watched in such a vulnerable moment; he had been so distraught by his mother’s passing that he had forgotten to be always alert. What if this human had attacked! His warren! His kin! His people! In danger! All his instincts yelled at him to run, to hide, to attack, to raise a million corpses and destroy until there was nothing left.

The human bowed.

This way it was easier for Wei Ying to see his face.

His heart seemed to stop for a full second.

His dark hair fell forwards from his shoulders, the ends of a ribbon dragged with it. Amber eyes cast downwards, face straight in perfect lack of emotion. The picture of virtue in carved jade.

Still bowing, Lan Wanji spoke to him.  

“I am sorry for your loss.” And then he walked away.

Chapter Text

To this day, Wei Ying is confused.

Why would HanGuang-Jun bow, speak, to a rabbit? Can HanGuang-Jun understand rabbits? He wouldn’t put it past him. After all, Lan Zhan always liked them, didn’t he?

He asks the rabbits born in Hrair Hain if they speak to humans. They laugh.

“Of course not!” They all tell him. “That is ridiculous! Humans cannot understand Lapine!”

Wei Ying asks, then, where can he see a human. They offer to take him.

It is a lovely day, sunny and bright when they take him to a clearing in the outskirts of the forest where Wei Ying has settled his warren.

Lan Wanji is sitting in the middle, bathed in light and surrounded by bunnies who wander and nap in comfort of his presence. He is sitting quietly, as always, but looks at peace. Wei Ying thinks he can even see the starts of a smile in the Lan’s face as he sees two young ones playing tag under his knees.

He seems to notice them but makes no move towards them, which is comforting to Wei Ying. He knows Lan Zhan is good around rabbits: he doesn’t yell, doesn’t make any sudden movements, doesn’t try to grab any of his kin around him.

It makes it easier for Wei Ying to study him and their surroundings.

Which, incidentally, is what really surprises him.

The white halls, the clear skies, the gigantic wall full of rules that looms over every building.

Hrair Hain is the Cloud Recesses.

‘Warren of a Thousand Songs’, ha! He should have known!

Ah, he can't believe he is in Gusu now!

Oh! This means the warren who has lived here is from the rabbits he gave Lan Zhan all those years ago!

He counts quickly in his head, adding and subtracting as quickly as he can. If his mother’s family came from the original two… It means he is a child of those two rabbits!

The irony!

Ah, it’s so strange! As a rabbit, he can see so much more of Lan Zhan like this. He notices every move much faster, his smell is stronger now, and a basic instinct inside him tells him to run straight into his arms for safety and warmth, to drown in his scent. He stops himself.

Lan Zhan hated him. And for so many years! If he knew it was Wei Ying inside a rabbit’s body, he’d break the no-killing rule, for sure. It pains Wei Ying to still cause such strong feelings in him; he wanted a reaction, but not this. This is terrible and brings them both nothing but suffering and frustration.

So, he stays still, looking over the other rabbits as they play. If it all remains like this, he will invite his warren to join them. They will like it. Willow would love hanging around a human, he thinks. A safe human, one who is not Elil. He would love belly scratches.

As Frith comes down, all the rabbits begin pulling away. Wei Ying watches as Lan Zhan sets his guqin and begins playing Inquiry.

The music is soothing, and it lulls him, between the ups and downs, the flow of notes and Lan Zhan’s voice he could fall asleep.

It is his words that keep him awake.

He sometimes speaks out loud, or musses over a question. It is… Cute. It is a side of Lan Zhan (this older, refined Lan Zhan Wei Ying never had the chance to meet as a human) he never thought he’d know. He never even imagined existed.

Suddenly, he hears.

“Are you Wei Ying?”

He raises his head in full alert, wide awake, but Lan Zhan isn’t looking at him. He looks straight ahead, deep in conversations with the spirits.

Obviously, the spirit’s answer is no, and Lan Zhan goes on with the process.

But then, he asks another.

“Are you Wei Ying?”

And another, and another, and another.

He asks as insistently as he asked the Yiling Patriarch to go to Gusu with him.

Wei Ying can do little but stare at him. He doesn’t want to interrupt him, and he kinda also wants to know why is Lan Zhan asking for him. Was his death not enough?

Does he need to atone for his sins even after death?

Wei Ying watches Lan Zhan all through the night.

It is well after nine that Lan Zhan seems to have had enough of Inquiry. He puts his guqin down and, to Wei Ying’s surprise, he pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. He stands up and walks away, instrument in hand.

Wei Ying has even more questions than he did before.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Good thing is, he no longer mistrusts Lan Zhan! He can safely tell his warren to explore to their heart's content now that he knows it is Lan Zhan watching over them.

He, himself, doesn’t get very close, but his warren sure does. They all are excited about studying humans, especially with the knowledge that their Leader used to be like this.

They jump around him with questions.

“Were you tall like that?” Yes.

“Is he beautiful to human standards?” Yes, very.

“Were you beautiful?” Yes, but I was scarier.

“What is that on his back?” A guqin. It makes music. If you stay long enough you will hear it.

“Did you use one too?” Not a guqin. A dizi. Not as big.

They keep asking and Wei Ying answers, happy to finally remember good things of his life. As painful as it all was, speaking of small details like this is good. It doesn’t make him as sad.

True to Wei Ying’s words, after sunset, Lan Zhan begins playing, entrancing the Yiling Warren. They huddle and cuddle, but their ears are in alert as they watch this one human play.

“What is this?” Willow asks Wei Ying, awed.

“Inquiry.” Wei Ying pronounces. “Question.” He says in Lapine. “It is music to speak to those who are dead.”

“Those in the Black Rabbit’s Owsla?”

Wei Ying shakes his head.

“No. Humans don’t always, er, join the Owsla. They stay in the middle. They need Question to tell people like him how to move on.”

Willow seems deep in thought.

“Humans are strange then.” He finally says. “They all defy the order. Even you.”

Wei Ying laughs softly.

“I don’t count. I didn’t want to live.” He confesses for the first time. Willow will never understand how that feels. There has never been an animal who committed suicide. Animals are all instinct and drive. Humans lack animality, and it shows. But at least Willow will not judge him for it.

“Did you know how to do Question?”

“No, I played different music. Much less helpful. Sky Blue is a much better man.”

Willow makes a double take.

“Sky Blue? Is that his name?”

Wei Ying wishes he knew how to hold his own damn tongue.

“The translation, yes.”

“You know him!” He accuses and the rabbits around them look at them. Thankfully Lan Zhan seems too taken with Inquiry to notice the rabbits doing some synchronized movements.

“I knew him, yes.” Forget holding it, he deserves to have his tongue cut. “It has been a long time, now. And we were never close.” He shouldn’t be as pained as he was, and yet, his little bunny heart aches at the rejection.

Willow doesn’t seem like he will let the subject go as he should.

“We are in presence of one human who used to be a friend of Hyinlé-Rah!”

“Why do you call him ‘my friend’? I just told you we were never close!”

“Maybe,” Willow pats his friend’s face. “But you don’t call people ‘good’ if they’re not. You have only called that three humans now! Zorn-Hrair-Rah and the father of your kit,” rabbits around them look at them, scandalized. “And now, this one- Oh!” Willow races towards Lan Zhan, Wei Ying trailing behind him. He jumps straight into the man’s lap. Wei Ying does not dare to.

Lan Zhan stops playing and looks down at the little rabbit stepping into his robes.

“Willow!” Wei Ying hisses at him. “Come back!”

But Willow is too busy looking into Lan Zhan’s face, ears straight in full attention.

“’ Fur dark like the night but eyes the same color of the sun’, that is what you said!” Willow gasps. “This one’s eyes are yellow! Hyinlé, you!” He jumps up and down, still in Lan Zhan’s lap, to Wei Ying’s horror. “Sky Blue is the father of your kit!”

“His what?” He hears Blossom yell out, but Wei Ying pays no attention to her. He is having an inner fight: should he allow Willow to keep dirtying Lan Zhan’s white, pristine robes or should he dirty them himself by reaching into them and pulling his ‘right hand’ away from him?

In the end, it is Lan Zhan who makes the decision. He lowers his right hand into Willow’s fur and starts petting. Wei Ying has never felt any kind of petting, but it must be heavenly because Willow melts into Lan Zhan’s touch.

For the rest of the night, Wei Ying is proven right: Willow loves belly scratches.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And that is how Wei Ying’s Warren falls in love with Lan Zhan.

Almost every day, they’re there, looking at him. It should probably be unnerving, having over twenty rabbits staring at you, unblinking, but Lan Zhan suffers through it gracefully; acts like he can barely notice the increasing numbers of moving beings in his lap every evening.

It all plays out like that for weeks, and then the Hrair Hain warren seems to catch onto the rumors surrounding Wei Ying.

“Eluelil,” Calls for him one fateful day Wolfberry, the grey rabbit who welcomed them. He is acting leader of the warren, a nephew of the original two. This makes him Wei Ying’s cousin. This makes at least half of the Gusu warren Wei Ying’s cousin, actually.

He tries not to think about it much.

“Eluelil, I have a question.”

“Then ask it.” He says. He is in a good mood, keeping guard in the comfortable warmth. “What can I help you with, Wolfberry-Rah?”

“There are rumors-“

“They always are, go ahead and ask what you want to know. Let’s clear the air. What are they saying about me?” And because being a rabbit cannot take his human humor completely away, he jokes around. “Am I the Black Rabbit’s kit? Do I turn into shadows when the sun touches the Earth?”

“Hyinlé-Rah!” Wolfberry-Rah exclaims, seemingly taken aback by his casualness.

“Ahahaha, forgive me, Prince of Hrain Hain, I couldn’t help it!” He laughs and steps down from his post; he shakes his tail and his face to shake off the drowsiness of his calm guard. “Ask, ask! I will be serious now, I promise.”

“They say-“ He looks away. “You were saved by Frith from a past human life.”

“Oh, that. Yeah, that is true.”

“It is?!” Wolfberry-Rah’s eyes widen. “How did that happen?”

“I was not a good human. I must admit I am a better rabbit. I fought in a war and made enemies with the power I developed.”

“By power you mean, a strong Owsla? A fierce warren?”

“Ah, no.” How can he explain demonic cultivation to a rabbit? “I learned how to call the Black Rabbit’s Owsla for myself.” That’s the closest one. “Because my warren could not fight, the dead fought in their place while I led them. In the end, I lost control.” Speaking of it is easier every time. He knows sharing it unburdens him, but he cannot share everything. Only mother knew of Jiang YanLi and her family, and the extent of his life in Lotus Pier and the results of it “That was what caused my death. I was blessed to be reborn. I thought my spirit would never see the sky again.”

 “I… I see…”

“Please, be not tharned!” Wei Ying beams at him and it is not entirely fake. “All this was seasons ago, and I’ve learned to let it go. It is not something that important now. My death wasn’t that big of a deal.”

Wolfberry-Rah seems to notice he’s bullshitting but says nothing about it.

“Can I ask more, then?”

“Of course!”

“Then, it is true you understand the human tongue.”

“It is!”

“So, when that one,” he looks in Lan Zhan’s direction. “Speaks, you understand him?”

“I do!”

“Some in your warren say you know him.”

“I do!”

“What is his name?”

“Why?”

Wolfberry-Rah makes a double take.

“What?”

“Why? Can you not keep calling him ‘human’?” Wei Ying will be the first one to say it: just because he is a better rabbit than he was a human doesn’t mean he is a good rabbit.  He does his job as Leader and does it to perfection, but this “extra” knowledge, he wishes to keep it to himself. For human words and human names and their history, he is selfish. And Lan Zhan was a secret only for himself. Like their time in the cave, or their weeks in the library.

“It is thanks to him that we flourish!” Wolfberry-Rah answers. “He is deserving of the utmost respect, just below Frith! We call him ‘Frith-sent’, but if the chance comes to call him by his actual name, we want to! Me and our elders and our warren owe him everything!”

Wei Ying laughs.

“That is not entirely true!” He says. “It is true that he gives you food and shelter, but who was it that brought you here? Is he not deserving of the same treatment?” He’s pushing his luck right now, but he doesn’t care much. He wants to complain, and he will. Rabbits can be fairer than humans, and that is the only reason he’s saying these things.

Well, that and the fact that Wolfberry’s shocked face is hilarious.

“Y-you…” Wolfberry-Rah looks at him in disbelief. “How do you know that?”

“Because I brought them here! Ask your elders for the story! They were a gift to ask for forgiveness for stupid stuff I did to Sky Blue, and they were well received! And where are my thanks?” He jumps around Wolfberry playfully. “C’mon, Warren Leader, where are my thanks?”

“His name is Sky Blue?” Wolfberry asks, ignoring his whole plight. Wei Ying is not that offended. He is accustomed to people ignoring his drama.

“It is, but it’s a name not everyone should use.” Wei Ying himself shouldn’t use it.  “We should call him by his title!”

“And what is that one?”

“Mn? HanGuang-Jun.” And then he translates. “’ He who holds light.’ Hyfrith-Rah.”

“Prince of the Shine of the Sun.” Says Wolfberry-Rah, looking at Lan Zhan with awe. “We are well-met in his presence.”

Wei Ying says nothing more, but he agrees.

It had been too long since he had spent so much time in Lan Zhan’s presence, and every second spent looking at him is a blessing. He hadn’t realized how much he missed him.

Chapter Text

Wei Ying would have never gotten closer to Lan Zhan if he had had it his way, actually.

If Wei Ying could have had it his way, he would have sat down five feet away, looking over his warren until the Black Rabbit of Inlé came for him.

Not that there was anything wrong with Lan Zhan! He was still as perfect, wonderful, and beautiful as always; but that was the thing. Lan Zhan had only improved, became a better disciple and musician, and was still an extraordinary man, and Wei Ying was…

Well, Wei Ying was a rabbit. A great rabbit, even, for rabbit standards! But by human standards, he basically went from nightmare to laughing stock. So yeah, Wei Ying didn’t want to get that close to Lan Zhan (to be rejected, again), and was kind of managing it!

Then again, things rarely go Wei Ying’s way.

It had been an exciting day! Lots of movement and voices louder than usual. While the warrens stayed inside the forest, the leaders, Wolfberry and Hyinlé, kept watch at the very border, looking at how humans came and went.

“What is happening, Eluelil?” Wolfberry looks at the humans like all the bad things in the world are their fault; Lan Zhan, Hyfrith-Rah, hasn’t come to see them at all, and it’s making the Warren antsy. Wei Ying shrugs.

“I think someone’s coming, but I’m not sure who. They don’t talk a lot.” Both rabbits crouch as a disciple comes too close to them as he rushes inside the forest.

“Why me, why me…” He mumbles. Wei Ying follows him silently. “Agh, this is heavy-“ He’s carrying their food of the day: a mixture of leftover vegetables and hay. Wei Ying and Wolfberry get closer and stare at him, as do those who are brave enough leave their hiding places. The disciple looks slightly unnerved. “Er, hello. I can’t believe I’m doing this…” He mumbles to himself. “HanGuang-Jun sends this for you with his apologies. We will be receiving the YungMeng Jiang sect and the LanlingJin sect and cannot spare time. Thank you for your consideration.” He bows to the rabbits and leaves in even more of a hurry than he came in with.

The rabbits surround their leaders and begin questioning Wei Ying.

“What did he say? What did he say?”

“Is it something about Hyfrith-Rah? Is he alright?”

“When will he come?”

“Quiet down!” He orders. “They’re having a meeting with other warrens and Hyfrith-Rah will not be coming.” Sad murmurs and moaning are heard from the mixed warren and Wei Ying wants to laugh. How adored is Lan Zhan! “He sends apologies and food for us.”

The rabbits waste no more time and begin attacking the greens. Only Willow stays behind, to keep watch with him, but also to talk.

“The sect that is coming,” He says. “Is it not the one where you grew up?” Wei Ying nods. “Do you think Zorn-Hrair-Rah will be here?”

“He will.” He has no doubt. “But I do not think he will be coming to see the rabbits any time soon. He’s got bigger things to think about.”

Willow accepts his words and they remain quiet while their family feeds.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..

The day carries on, uneventful. The sun comes and goes, people come and go, and the rabbits are vastly ignored. This is fine, Wei Ying thinks. They will just mind their own business.

It’s very well until one of the JungMeng disciples manages to set loose a dog.

Why on earth have they brought a dog?! Wei Ying wants to yell. He ushers his warren back to the burrow, everyone in a frenzy. Willow is doing an amazing job at watching out for the kits, as are Wolfberry’s Owsla, but it is not enough. The dog, who cannot be called such, honestly, he is barely a pup, is wreaking havoc: he play-bites at the rabbits and barks, obviously enjoying himself.

Wei Ying is terrified. He is running with his warren, but he can say he is the most scared of all of them. Every time the pup yips he feels shivers up and down his spine. He tries to think of his responsibilities, of his beloved warren, but it is so, so difficult to face one’s fears! Especially since now they are twice as big!

“Hyinlé-Rah, over here!” Wolfberry calls and Wei Ying follows the sound of his voice. They run together. “We have to pull it away from the burrows!” He says. “Let’s call his attention and lead him to the border of the forest.” Wei Ying is shaking from head to toe. He barely manages a nod-

Then they are running again. Running, running, running. Trees and roots become a blur as they are chased. For the first time in years, Wei Ying is out of breath. He cannot think, he cannot plan, he is incapable of rational thought. He can only follow raw instinct.

When they get to the border, this becomes clear: Wolfberry-Rah manages to pull away from the chase, hiding in bushes, confusing the dog away from his scent. It is kit’s play for a rabbit, but Wei Ying is not right. He keeps running, pushes his legs past the breaking point, hops and screeches. He is out of his mind from the fear and no one can help him now, except for-

A white figure appears in the distance, and Lan Zhan is all Wei Ying can think about.

Lan Zhan is taller than the dog. Lan Zhan cares for his rabbits. Lan Zhan will protect him.

Wei Ying jumps over the fence, followed closely by the dog.

Disciples of the three sects move out of the way when he rushes through. He scurries through people’s legs, taking advantage in his smaller size, he runs through the halls of the Cloud Recesses until he reaches the dining room.

The sect leaders have barely sat down and even Lan Zhan is still standing up, and before he has the chance to lean down, he looks sideways to the ruckus at the door. His eyes widen for a second before Wei Ying manages to jump into his chest. Lan Zhan’s hands move instinctively to cradle him, covering him completely. Wei Ying is shaking like a leaf, but he knows he is safe now. Lan Zhan won’t drop him. Lan Zhan will not send him to the dogs. Ever.

“What is this?” A pissed off voice yells over the barks of the pup, who is definitely still running around. “What is happening?”

Wei Ying cannot see, but he hears it all.

“Sect Leader, we’re so sorry!” Someone says, and boy, are they in trouble. “But, the dog, the gift for Young Master Jin RuLan, he ran out to the forest-“

He is cut off by someone else.

“Then grab him and take him back!” Wei Ying listens as someone grabs the pup (who makes an undignified sound as he is taken away from the room) and they close the door.

There is silence. Wei Ying’s breathing has slowed down, still protected against Lan Zhan’s chest, breathing in his sandalwood scent. All is well.

“Wanji, what is that?” Lan XiChen says. Lan Zhan opens his hands carefully.

“He ran all the way.” He says. Wei Ying looks up and finds himself in the worst company. Sitting all around them are Jin GuangYao, Jiang Cheng, and elders of the respective sects.

Wei Ying hasn’t been this awkward since before his death.

“Is that a rabbit?” Jiang Cheng sneers, making Wei Ying panic. He and Jiang Cheng used to hunt rabbits and eat them, just because. That very well may be his fate if he is not careful. He retreats into Lan Zhan’s robes. He is gently pet on his back. It is extremely soothing, knowing he is in Lan Zhan’s arms.

“Is he one of the new ones’” Lan XiChen asks.

“Mn.” The petting moves from his back to his nape, just before his ears. It tickles.

“Ah! You see,” Lan XiChen explains to his guests. “A few months ago, a new group of rabbits came to join the warren we have here. We’re still trying to name them all!”

“You name all the rabbits?” Jin GuangYao asks Lan Zhan.

“Mn.”

“Does this one have a name already?”

Lan Zhan shakes his head.

“First time holding him.”

“Awe, is he shy?” Someone’s disciple asks and receives a smack in the back of his head. How shameless he is in speaking to HanGuang Jun like that!

“Didn’t trust.” Lan Zhan corrects.

Wei Ying is raised carefully up to Lan Zhan’s eye level. He is studied carefully. Wei Ying puts a paw on Lan Zhan’s nose. They do not move.

Lan XiChen stifles a laugh.

“What will you name him?”

Before Lan Zhan can answer, Jiang Cheng snorts.

“With that much fear of dogs and all that black fur? There’s only one name he can have.”

The room falls silent, and Wei Ying lets his paw fall from Lan Zhan’s face. Is Jiang Cheng really suggesting…

“Mn.” Lan Zhan says but doesn’t follow up with an explanation. He turns to Lan XiChen. “I will take him back to the enclosure.”

Lan XiChen nods, and as he leaves Lan Zhan bows to the guests.

He walks slowly, carrying Wei Ying firmly against his chest. The smell of dog is still strong in the hallways and Wei Ying squirms in Lan Zhan’s arms.

One of Lan Zhan’s hands comes and strokes his head affectionately.

“Calm down.” He says, and Wei Ying can feel the sound reverberate through the man’s chest. “I am here.”

Yes, Wei Ying wants to say. You are here.

For the first time in years, Wei Ying feels completely safe.

When they reach the enclosure Wei Ying literally fights to not be put down. He claws at Lan Zhan’s robes and looks up imploringly. He has never wished to be so close to someone before. It is a very strange feeling.

Lan Zhan raises him again and speaks to him very seriously.

“You have to stay.”

Wei Ying flattens his ears and starts patting Lan Zhan’s face. To his surprise, the human’s mouth quirks up.

This was…

This was Lan Zhan smiling.

It was barely there, but it was.

“Awe, Hyfrith!” He coos, patting more forcefully. “How come I am the rabbit and yet you are the cute one! If you had looked at me like that, I would have fallen for you!” And if he had bigger hands, he would be squishing Lan Zhan’s cheeks.

Lan Zhan pulls away from his paws and shakes his head.

“Go to the burrow.” He says as he puts Wei Ying on the floor. “I will return.”

Wei Ying rushes behind him as he leaves. He sees how Lan Zhan pays special attention to his steps because Wei Ying keeps hoping in between his feet.

He directs him one last kind look before going back inside.

That look only makes Wei Ying think that, if he had tried a little harder to be Lan Zhan’s friend, he could have had this sweet life much earlier.

Chapter Text

This sparks the beginning of their relationship if it can be called that.

Whenever Lan Zhan sits down, Wei Ying is the first one to jump on him. He is constantly asking for his attention, chirping and purring to have Lan Zhan’s eyes on him. And while everyone gets pet, it is clear Wei Ying is a favorite.

“It makes sense!” Says Wolfberry-Rah one time, when Wei Ying is being squished lovingly in Lan Zhan’s hands. “Hyinlé-Rah is favored by Frith, it is only natural that Hyfrith-Rah, a direct descendant, would favor Eluelil too!”

Wei Ying snickers and tells Lan Zhan this.

“You cannot understand his words, Hyfrith.” Whenever he speaks, Lan Zhan can only hear purrs and chirps, but Wei Ying doesn’t mind. Lan Zhan pays attention to him anyway and that is all that matters. “They are saying you are the son of a god, maybe a god yourself! What would your uncle say, uh?” He laughs to himself. “He’d surely punish us all for being disrespectful to the gods! Ah, but then again, they’re not wrong! Sky Blue, Hyfrith-Rah, you really are the closest thing to a god that we have here! If you keep treating us so nicely, we will surely abandon Frith and adore you!”

Lan Zhan stares at him impassively but moves his hand from Wei Ying’s ears to his nose, and starts rubbing, making his whiskers twitch.

“You enjoy teasing me, Hyfrith-Rah! Is this your revenge for all those times I teased you?” Wei Ying makes a show of squirming, but it’s all a game: he doesn’t want Lan Zhan to stop, and even if he did, Lan Zhan is a thousand times stronger than him. The only safeguard Wei Ying has at the moment is his teeth-

Not that he would use them! He trusts Lan Zhan with his life, right now.

He is more than happy to let Lan Zhan rub, poke, and squish him. It is a different kind of affection he’s only felt as a rabbit. As a human, the only one who got close enough to him to hug and press skin on skin was Wen Yuan, who is now dead…

Or not!

Wei Ying believes with his whole being that Lan Zhan saved his A-Yuan. He has no actual proof but has no doubt either.

He noticed this the first time Lan Zhan took one of the little disciples with him to see the rabbits. He is small enough that Lan Zhan holds his hand while they walk up to the rabbits.

He cannot be older than five, and he is so cute!

And his face is so familiar Wei Ying needs to take a moment to breathe correctly. He would bet his entire life away that that is A-Yuan, with his big grey eyes and tender smile.

This is Wen Yuan, no matter that Lan Zhan calls him a Lan.

And so, Wei Ying could kiss Lan Zhan for saving his child and making him a disciple. This way, no one will ever hurt him, and he will be safe from anyone who’d want to kill him for being a ‘Wen-dog’.

“Lan Yuan.” Lan Zhan calls and A-Yuan sits right next to him.

None of the rabbits are coming closer, just staring. The warrens know Hyfrith-Rah, but not this other human.

“Give them time.” Lan Zhan says. “Do not scare them with sudden movements.”

A-Yuan gives a stiff nod and tries his very best not to move a muscle. For Wei Ying, this is the cutest thing in the entire world. He gives a couple of hops towards them, and Willow follows after a moment.

“Hyinlé-Rah?”

“That’s-“ He mutters, heart beating loudly. He wants to run towards them, he wants to take A-Yuan in his arms like he did long ago, he wants to hide, to not feel all these emotions rattling around in his chest.

“Hyinlé-“

“’To long for’,” he interrupts. “My kit, he’s so grown up!” He chirps happily. “He’s so big and so strong and- look! Aw, Willow, isn’t my kit cute?”

Willow makes a face like he wants to tell Wei Ying something, but isn’t exactly sure how to.

Wei Ying chooses to ignore this insult to his A-Yuan and starts walking towards him. He moves slowly, not because he’s scared, but because he wants to give A-Yuan plenty of time to see him.

And it works.

“Father, look!” A-Yuan whispers and at his voice Wei Ying’s ears twitch. Ah, he’s too cute!

“Mn.”

“He’s coming here!” Lan Yuan grabs Lan Zhan’s sleeve without taking his eyes off Wei Ying. Lan Zhan is not looking at the rabbit, Wei Ying notices. He’s looking straight at his child.

“Mn. Wait a bit more before moving.”

“Mn!”

A-Yuan stays still until Wei Ying is right in front of him, leaning on the kid’s knees to peer up at his face.

“Father-“

“It is alright. Move slowly. Try to pick him up.” Lan Zhan encourages. It is only because of Wei Ying’s new fantastic sense of hearing that he can notice the slight changes in Lan Zhan’s voice. It is much, much easier understanding him!

A-Yuan’s hands leave his father’s robes and move trembling towards Wei Ying.

It is now the rabbit’s turn to try to stay as still as possible. Lan Yuan carries him like a pro, he must admit. He is careful of not crushing Wei Ying’s ribs and puts special attention in not letting him hang in the air.

His boy is so considerate! Lan Zhan has done an excellent job.

“Press him to your chest.” Lan Zhan instructs, and A-Yuan does.

From this position, Wei Ying is the happiest. He can smell A-Yuan’s scent, still a child’s smell mixed with incense, and he has a perfect view of Lan Zhan’s face. He is also pressed right beside A-Yuan’s heart, the sound of his child’s life soothing him.

Seeing him so relaxed, the rest of the warren decides to get closer. Even if they are walking towards Lan Zhan, A-Yuan gets excited at seeing so many rabbits so near. Wei Ying can hear it in his heart. It’s adorable.

“Father, father!” He exclaims. “The rabbits!”

“Mn.” Lan Zhan stretches his hand and gives some of the rabbits from Hrair Hain some pats. The Yiling warren is more interested in A-Yuan, anyway. They stare and mutter amongst them. Wei Ying decides to explain. He squirms in A-Yuan’s arms to get to look at the warren, A-Yuan tensing up as to not let him fall (not that falling from A-Yuan’s chest to his lap would hurt him, but it’s the thought that counts).

“’To long for’ is a human kit!” He says. “He is Hyfrith-Rah’s kit!”

Gasps form around as all the rabbits turn to watch A-Yuan. Wei Ying’s chest puffs with pride: his kit will be very loved by both warrens.

From A-Yuan’s knees, Willow speaks.

“What will be his Lapine name?”

Wei Ying barely misses a beat.

“Nizen!” He tells them. “Time of Dew!”

His warren coos and purrs at this kit.

Willow purrs the loudest against the kid’s knees.

“Nizenroo, little prince!” Blossom joins her son in front of A-Yuan and begins climbing the kit’s robes so she can press her paws against his stomach. “Little star!”

A-Yuan giggles.

“That tickles.” He says to Blossom, and Wei Ying translates. Willow immediately climbs next to her mother, causing the child to have a giggling fit.

More and more rabbits begin walking on top of the kid, all the while purring and cooing lovingly.

They soon overpower him, making him fall back.

As he does, he releases Wei Ying from their embrace. He jumps out of the way and settles next to his face, staring as the kid is slowly covered in fluff and purrs.

“Fa-a-ather!” He laughs and giggles. “He-elp!”

“Mn.” Lan Zhan says, but makes no move towards him. Wei Ying laughs. Who knew Lan Zhan could be this devious! It seems to be fated that A-Yuan will always be buried under something, even if he admits it would be easier to save him from bunnies than from the dirt Wei Ying used to pour around him.

After several minutes, Lan Zhan takes pity on his son and recovers him from under all the bunnies, who jump around them still. He sits A-Yuan in his lap and points at Wolfberry.

“A-Huan.” He says, and Wei Ying laughs loudly. He named this rabbit like his brother!

A-Yuan laughs too.

Lan Zhan points to another rabbit of Hrair Hain and calls him by the name of another disciple, and another, and another. A-Yuan is delighted.

“Those who do not have names are new.” Lan Zhan says, and A-Yuan must understand what he means because he answers back with:

“Let’s choose names for them!” He then points directly to Blossom and declares: “Ren-Shu!”

Wei Ying almost chokes on his spit. This child! Taking Lan QiRen’s name and naming a rabbit like him!

Lan Zhan seems to think the exact same because he takes a moment before correcting him.

“Ren-mei. She is a female.”

“Alright! And that one?” He points to Willow.

“Male.”

“Xiao-di. And that one?”

“Male.”

“Yang-di. And that one?” They carry on for some time, naming each and every rabbit. Wei Ying takes the opportunity to tell them what they’re being called, too. They laugh at the child’s words and take no offense at all. They jokingly call each other those names. Everyone’s in a good mood.

“Father, the black one?” A-Yuan asks, bringing Wei Ying to reality.

“Already has a name.” Lan Zhan says, and Wei Ying perks up. He does? After Jiang Cheng’s comment on what his name should be, he’s very interested in what Lan Zhan has chosen.

“What is it?”

Lan Zhan pauses and stares at Hyinlé with a strange feeling pooling in his eyes. The rabbit stares back, feeling like he is fifteen and standing on the roof again. Moonlight bathed him then, the same it does now in name.  

“A-Ying.” He finally says. Wei Ying’s name in Lan Zhan’s voice sounds beautiful, but it is not really him. He can’t believe Lan Zhan agreed with Jiang Cheng on something.

He should be much more offended but he’s a little relieved that that is his name.

In some way, it means Wei Ying is still Wei Ying.

Chapter Text

“For instance, if you come at four in the afternoon, I'll begin to be happy by three.

The closer it gets to four, the happier I'll feel.

By four I'll be excited and worried; I'll discover what it costs to be happy!

But if you come at an odd time, I'll never know when I should prepare my heart...

There must be rites.”

It is not always happiness, as much as Wei Ying would like to say so.

There are moments of sadness and pain, like the deaths of the elders, the parting of someone’s mate, the death of some kit.

This brings the hushed murmuring of Lapine prayers to the Black Rabbit, evenings of groups of rabbits taking care of those who remain, and the painful return to reality and routine.

It is nothing compared to the silent mourning of Hyfrith-Rah.

It’s not a particularly dark day, Wei Ying remembers. What strikes the day as odd is how early Lan Zhan comes to sit with his rabbits, and how his eyes lack life.

It is barely over sunrise when he is already settled, armed with greens, and painfilled eyes. Wei Ying doesn’t know if he could notice that because he was a rabbit or because he had spent more time with him, with the liberty of studying him.

Either way, Lan Zhan is in pain, and he knows not why.

He walks carefully up to him, doubting before settling slowly into his lap. Lan Zhan’s hands come later than usual to pick him up, his movements sluggish as he presses the rabbit under his chin.

His breathing is too slow like he is dying. This worries Wei Ying; is Lan Zhan sick? He sniffles the air. There is no new or dangerous smell, other than salt.

Salt?

Wei Ying licks at Lan Zhan’s throat. It tastes of salt as well.

What the hell?

As the warrens come around them, others comment on the smell too; only Willow offers an answer:

“It smells like tears.”

The warrens quiet down.

“Then he is in pain,” Wolfberry-Rah says.

“There is no blood.” Willow counters. “Perhaps…“

“What?”

“Perhaps the pain is inside him?”

Why would Hyfrith-Rah cry, they ask themselves? Had someone died? It must be a truly terrible death if he is feeling so intensely! (Rabbits only cry when the pain is unbearable, Wei Ying had learned when he was young. It is not easy to make a rabbit cry.)

Oh, gods, Wei Ying thinks. What if it is A-Yuan? Lan XiChen? Lan QiRen?

Any of these deaths would bring mourning to the warren as well. If their caretaker is in such great suffering, they will take their time with him as well.

“Worry not, Hyfrith.” Wei Ying mumbles against Lan Zhan’s throat, making sure to purr loudly enough for him to feel it. “Whatever it is you’re mourning we mourn with you. I am sorry for your loss.”

“My heart has joined the Thousand,” Wolfberry-Rah begins, and the warrens complete the prayer.

“For my friend stopped running today.”

Whomever Lan Zhan has cried for, the warrens pay their respects.

Lan Zhan’s hands tighten against Wei Ying’s little body, and Wei Ying makes a conscious effort not to move. If what Lan Zhan wants is to be cuddled, to hold someone, anyone close, Wei Ying is honored to be so favored as to be the chosen one for it.

The Warrens come closer to Lan Zhan, making less of a ruckus today as they move around him, taking turns to press themselves to his legs and calves.

In all that time, Lan Zhan’s hold of Wei Ying doesn’t lessen.

It is around nine when Lan XiChen appears. He brings with him a single plate filled to the brim.

“Wangji.” He calls softly. “You didn’t come for breakfast.”

Lan Zhan doesn’t answer.  All the rabbits’ eyes are on him.

“I brought you some rice, won’t you eat?” Silence.

“Wangji.” He sighs. “It is no good if you starve yourself.”

Still more silence. Wei Ying listens attentively. Lan Zhan is mourning but Lan XiChen is not? Then it is not someone from their family?

But Lan XiChen is the most social of them both! How can it be that Lan Zhan-

“Wangji, it has spices in it.” Lan XiChen sighs like he’s pulling out the last resource. “Please, don’t let it go to waste. He would not have liked that.”

This makes Lan Zhan raise his head ever so slightly, but in Wei Ying’s privileged position, he can see it clearly. His mind races; Lan XiChen speaks of a ‘he’ who is now gone, and this ‘gone-ness’ is enough to make Lan Zhan, HangGuan-Jun, one of the best cultivators in the world, fall into a catatonic state.

Lan Zhan must have held this man very dearly in his heart, he thinks. Wei Ying feels half sad, half jealous. Was he someone he knew? Lan Zhan never said he liked anyone! He had very few friends!

Then again, even if Lan Zhan had someone, he wouldn’t have told Wei Ying. It’s ridiculous to even think about it. How would that conversation have gone, anyway? ‘Wei Ying, come back to Gusu with me. Also, let's sit down to have tea and catch up on our relationships in society. There is this person that I love so much that if he died, I’d die too.’ Yeah, Lan Zhan would never say anything like that.

He is put down in Lan Zhan’s lap for the human to receive the rice. Lan XiChen sighs in relief, like he hadn’t expected compliance.

“I will come later, is that alright?”

“Mn.” Lan Zhan is staring at his rice like it contains all the answers in the universe and begins eating slowly. He closes his eyes and munches, sighing in contentment.

Lan XiChen walks away. Wei Ying doesn’t move from his spot in Lan Zhan’s lap while the man eats; he promises himself that, no matter who comes by, he will stay with Lan Zhan until he is better.

. . . . . . . .. . . . .. .

The next one to visit is Lan QiRen.

The rabbits flee when they hear him come, his steps noisy enough to be considered unsafe; Wei Ying doesn’t run, he is safe in Lan Zhan’s folded knees, his ears rubbed in earnest. He is fine.

“Wanji.” He calls.

“Mn?” Lan Zhan doesn’t stop his merciless attack on Wei Ying’s face.

“It is forbidden to lose time in frivolities.”

“Not a frivolity.” Lan Zhan’s eyes never leave Wei Ying, not for a single second. “Can die of loneliness.”

“They’re just rabbits.”

“A gift.” Still not looking up. “It is forbidden not to be thankful of gifts and debtless help.”

Wei Ying is amazed. He couldn’t even remember writing that rule down!

“It is forbidden to keep pets.”

“It is forbidden to kill.” Lan Zhan finally looks up at his uncle. “And not doing enough to save a life is killing by omission.”

“It has been three years already.”

Lan Zhan’s jaw clenches so fast it must be painful. His hands tremble around Wei Ying, and he is so close to leaving Hyfrith’s lap to fight the Old Man. How dare he belittle his own beloved nephew’s feelings?

Can he not see how sadness seems to have overrun Lan Zhan today?  

Lan Zhan begins stroking tentatively again but he doesn’t say any more to his uncle.

 “He truly took you with him to his grave.” Lan QiRen sits down next to his nephew and sighs. “Do you think you will ever stop?”

“Stop?”

“Stop mourning. Stop feeling that.”

“Ah.” Lan Zhan seems to think about it, then shakes his head. “No.”

Lan QiRen sighs and stops prying for a while. They just sit in silence. Lan Zhan’s eyes stay in Wei Ying as he begins squishing his cheeks. He thinks he must look pretty ridiculous because Lan Zhan exhales strongly. It’s his version of a laugh. Lan QiRen turns around at the sound, then catches sight of Wei Ying.

“A rabbit?”

“Mn.”

“The one that ran out the other day?”

“Mn. Scared.”

“I heard from A-Huan. A dog. Why would they ever bring one here?” He sounds frustrated. “I hadn’t seen such a ruckus since-“ Both men hold their breaths. Wei Ying is just very confused. The moment drags on, but surprisingly, it is Lan Zhan who breaks the silence.

“Mn. Since then. Lots of noise.”

Lan QiRen nods empathically.

“So much noise.” He smiles softly, and it surprises Wei Ying. He had never seen the Old Man smile! He didn’t look so old like that, his whole face softening. He even looks kinda handsome! “Was it very scared?” He asks about the rabbit.

“Calmed down. Brought him back.” Lan Zhan rubs the top of Wei Ying’s head and he purrs loudly at him. Lan QiRen looks at him interested.

“I thought rabbits were quiet animals.”

“Mn. Just this one.”

Is Lan Zhan calling him noisy?! He couldn’t even speak properly! He chirps his disagreement.

“Figures you’d like the noisy, black one.” Lan QiRen’s face is somber, but not terribly so. He doesn’t seem more than a little annoyed, but Wei Ying can’t figure out the meaning of the comment. A complicated feeling flashes behind the Old Man’s eyes before he clears his throat. “Could I- Can I hold it?”

Lan Zhan raises his head, seemingly surprised, as is Wei Ying. Lan QiRen wants to hold him? Doesn’t he know who he was named after?

“Mn.” Lan Zhan raises him carefully and places him on his uncle’s knees. The man moves his hands out of the way and is keeping them awkwardly raised. “It is fine, uncle.” Lan Zhan says to him. “Can touch. Friendly.”

“Friendly.” Lan QiRen repeats, but he does lower his hands.

“The head is fine.”

“Yes, the head.” Lan QiRen grazes his head. Wei Ying does an extraordinary effort to stay still. He no longer is in Lan Zhan’s reach. That makes him incredibly nervous. He can still smell him and see him, but the hand on him isn’t his. He tenses up as the finger strokes him a little more confidently. It isn’t unpleasant, just… Strange. Lan QiRen is petting him. If he were to turn human at that moment, the man would have a heart attack! A playful part of Wei Ying wants to play around the man, jump around him, see his reactions as a rabbit hops on him and his nephew, but his baser instincts keep him down until he relaxes a bit more.

As Lan QiRen’s finger strokes behind his ear, he can’t help a chirp.

“What was that?” Lan QiRen removes both hands again.

“Happy sound.” Lan Zhan reassures his uncle, then reaches out to rub Wei Ying’s nose, which he welcomes gladly. “A-Ying is happy.”

“It is called A-Ying? Wangji…” Lan QiRen groans. “You even put it on my lap…” He covers his face with his hands, refusing to look even in the rabbit’s direction.

Now that was more like what Wei Ying is used to! He can’t help but laugh.

“I should have known…” Lan QiRen keeps going. “Wangji, take it, please.” Lan Zhan does so, and Wei Ying settles back in his arms easily. Everything is better if he is in Lan Zhan’s arms. He is safe and happy and loved.

“I thought uncle liked A-Ying.” Lan Zhan says, and even Wei Ying can notice the teasing edge in his voice. Lan Zhan is being so brazen! Teasing his own uncle like that! What happened to the rule-loving man Wei Ying met! There was no trace of him!

“Stupid rabbits.” He murmured and Wei Ying’s mouth fell open.

“It is forbidden to curse within the Cloud Recesses.”

“I know, I know… I’ll copy… Something.” Lan QiRen waves this off. Wei Ying is laughing again. Who knew the Lans could be this terrible at keeping their own rules! And to think how many times Wei Ying was punished! “I still can’t believe you kept them.”

“Precious gift.”

“I know, but couldn’t he have given you books? Robes? Something that wasn’t such a… hassle.” Now they’re talking about him! He pays attention to really see what both men think of him. It’s his chance to find out if Lan Zhan really hated him when they were younger or if it all evolved for worse as they grew.

“Not a hassle. Cute.”

“Them being cute doesn’t take away the fact that they are one more chore.”

“A-Yuan likes them.”

“A-Yuan likes anything you show him. He loves you.” Lan QiRen’s face softens again and Wei Ying can’t believe it. The Old Man is so different with his family! And he loves A-Yuan too! The soft, loving aura around him is enough to make him forget about his plan to pay attention. Now, he just wants to revel in the nice moment.

“Mn.” Yeah, not even Lan Zhan can fight that argument. From what Wei Ying can see from his limited, Lapine point of view, A-Yuan adores his father. He can see it in the way his eyes widen when Lan Zhan does something graceful, or the undivided attention when he speaks.

Lan QiRen sighs, but this time it is a satisfied sound.

“It is a good family.”

“Mn.”

They stay in this good atmosphere some more until Lan QiRen excuses himself to keep working.

It is fine! Wei Ying is grateful for the visit, anyway. Lan Zhan seems to be in a much better state than he had earlier. Wei Ying would rise from the dead if he thought that would make Lan Zhan not be sad. (Not like Lan Zhan would be happy about that, but it’s an expression, alright? A sentiment.)

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It is after midday when Lan XiChen returns, this time with A-Yuan and a basket.

Both Lan Zhan and Wei Ying perk up at the sight of the boy. Lan Zhan looks slightly livelier as he is being smiled at by his son.

“Hello, father!” Lan Zhan tilts his head.

“A-Yuan, why don’t you sit next to your father?” The boy moves as quickly as he can to obey and gasps delighted when he sees who Lan Zhan is holding.

“What is it, A-Yuan?” XiChen asks, sitting in front of his brother.

“It is A-Ying!”

Lan XiChen stops completely.

“What?”

“Father is holding A-Ying!”

Lan Zhan opens his palms to show Wei Ying to his brother.

“A-Ying.” He confirms.

“Wanji…”

“It is alright, brother.” Lan Zhan says, and they stare at each other, silently conversing. It seems that Lan XiChen doesn’t approve of Wei Ying’s name. It’s ridiculous! Not even Lan QiRen put so much of a fight!

Well, Lan XiChen can think whatever he likes. He is Lan Zhan’s, so all the naming rights are his. He is not ashamed to admit his life belongs to Lan Zhan now. What is, is what must be, and Wei Ying is thrilled with his fate.

“Well then,” XiChen says. “Wangji should give me-“ He falters at this. “He should pass A-Ying over, so he can eat and drink, don’t you think, A-Yuan?”

“Mn!” The child nods fervently. “Uncle and I prepared it for father! It’s all very tasty food!”

Lan Zhan can’t really defend himself from that. It was smart of XiChen to bring A-Yuan with him right now, even if he is sure manipulation is against the rules.  

So, once again, Wei Ying is moved from Lan Zhan’s hands, but instead of staying in Lan XiChen’s hands, he wiggles out of them and hops over to A-Yuan’s lap. If he can’t be with Lan Zhan, he will be with his son.

He wants to, at least, get to choose.

And his boy is more than happy to receive him! He takes him softly in his arms and brushes his fur with care. Wei Ying purrs and licks at his face in thanks.

As he settles down, it is A-Yuan who speaks, evidently not caring for the “not speaking while eating rule”.

“Father, Uncle said you were feeling sad.”

Both men stand still, and even Wei Ying wants to quiet his kid now.

“Mn.” Lan Zhan will not lie.

“Why?”

“Someone… died. I remember, and I feel sad.”

“Oh.”

“Wangji,” Lan XiChen interrupts, clearly wanting to change the course of the conversation. It looks like no one is following the rules today! “Uncle said you were feeling better?”

“Mn.”

“I’m glad.” They share a look, and Wangji keeps eating. When he is done, A-Yuan speaks looks up from his lap where he’s been spoiling Wei Ying with rubs and speaks again.

“Father?”

“Mn.”

“Why do you come to the rabbits when you feel sad? When Jingy is sad, he goes to the teacher so she can tell him everything is fine, and then we all sit together. Do you not go to Uncle?”

All eyes, even Wei Ying’s, are on Lan Zhan. He seems to be thinking about how to explain.

“Rabbits were a gift from this person. It… Helps.”

Wait, what?

 Lan Zhan is crying, and not eating, and entering a goddamn catatonic state, because of him?

Seeing Lan Zhan’s eyes get glassy with tears is enough to rip Wei Ying’s heart. He is paralyzed with the feeling, not being able to do much more than staying still and listening and trying to understand what this all means.

Seeing that Lan Zhan is not going to elaborate, XiChen takes over the conversation.

“This person was a very dear friend of your father.” He says like he isn’t confusing Wei Ying even more. Lan Zhan considered him a friend? But- He always said they weren’t close! “And he died exactly three years ago.”

“Today is the any- annirsa- an-“ A-Yuan tries to pronounce.

“Anniversary.” XiChen pronounces for him.

Lan Yuan goes silent for some minutes, his hands not once stopping in Wei Ying’s fur. His cute, little face, all scrunched up in a frown. He is thinking.

“Father,” his voice is very quiet now. “Would it help if we told stories about him?”

Lan Zhan thinks for a moment before saying.

“En.”

XiChen is quick to begin.

“It is true that people do not mention Young Master Wei’s name but for bad memories, but Wangji and I met him before that happened. Let's see…” He makes a show of thinking, purely for A-Yuan’s presence. “What story should we tell?”

“The rabbit one!” A-Yuan cried out. “Where did he get the rabbits?”

“Well, you see…” As XiChen told the story (Wei Ying could only imagine how Lan Zhan had told his brother), Wei Ying stared at Lan Zhan; he seemed taken with the storytelling, too. His eyes soft, and not at dangerously filled with tears as before.

The sharing of stories gave Wei Ying plenty of time to think.

He was especially caught up on the idea that Lan Zhan didn’t hate him. He was even considered a close, dear person for him! This clashed with every single memory he had!

Though, to be fair, those memories were tainted with the paranoiac lens of Demonic Cultivation. He knew his path was demeaning his body, but he had no idea it had hurt his mind so much!

He went through his vague memories of Lan Zhan before his death.

He always seemed to be where chaos was, which was-

Where Wei Ying was.

Never very far away. At the time, he had been annoyed at the cultivator for trying to control him, but, what if that wasn’t control? What if it was just… Plain worry? A deep concern over a beloved person’s state.

Lan Zhan had taken him for food, and never insisted he paid back. He had walked with him, played with A-Yuan, bought toys for A-Yuan, helped him get to camp in Yiling… He even took A-Yuan in after his death.

Lan Zhan had been taking care of him.

And he hadn’t even realized.

Hadn’t even considered the possibility that Lan Zhan was not trying to hurt him, but to protect him.

Was his ‘Come back to Gusu with me’ deal part of that too?

Oh, gods, what if it was?! It meant Lan Zhan had tried again and again to save him, even from himself, and Wei Ying had thrown his help and his love back in his face.

A-Yuan starts laughing suddenly, bringing him back to reality. It seems Lan XiChen was telling some innocuous story of some prank he’d done when he was studying.

 Those had been good years, and it eases his mind to know Lan Zhan looks back at them as fondly as he does.

“Wangji, we should get going,” XiChen says, over the cries of A-Yuan to wait a few more minutes, to tell one more story.

“Almost nine.” Lan Zhan agrees.

“Are you coming with us?” Lan Zhan shakes his head.

“Inquiry.”

“What for?” Despite his protests, A-Yuan is putting Wei Ying on the floor.

“Call Wei Ying’s soul. Talk.”

Hearing it put so plainly is amazing for Wei Ying. He can’t very much wrap his head against the concept.

He is, even in death, someone so dear to Lan Zhan, that he will constantly break the rules to get a conversation with him.

It is even more crushing to realize Lan Zhan will never get an answer. Because Wei Ying is alive and standing right in front of him. As a rabbit.

If this is the punishment the gods decided for him for killing so many people? Being forced to watch as the, probably, last person on earth to actually care for him is ignored, and not even on purpose?

The gods are cruel.

Much more cruel that Hysil ever said Frith could be.

“Very well, Wangji. We will leave you to play.” The brothers tilt their heads at each other respectfully. “Say goodnight, A-Yuan.”

“Good night, father.” A-Yuan leaps at his father’s arms and kisses one of his cheeks. “See you tomorrow.”

They leave.

As it was in the morning, it is now only Wei Ying and Lan Zhan.

. . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . .

Lan Zhan plays Inquiry inexhaustibly, his beautiful, slender fingers playing the same notes again and again.

‘Wei Ying, Wei Ying.”

This night he is not paying attention to the other spirits who are drawn close.

‘Wei Ying, Wei Ying.’ The two notes repeat themselves like a heartbeat. Wei Ying is, in fact, sitting in Lan Zhan’s lap, watching as the man’s beautiful face contorts in pain every now and then.

After a couple of hours, he puts down the guqin and covers his face.

“Wei Ying.” He says, voice rough because of tiredness and disuse. “Please. Please, answer.”

“I am here, Hyfrith.” Wei Ying, Hyinlé, answers. But it is no use.

“Wei Ying.”

“I am here.”

“Wei Ying.” He is not even playing, he is just calling out for him in the middle of the night, in the middle of a forest, three years after his death. People would call him foolish, but Wei Ying finds it heart-breaking. Just how much did Lan Zhan care for him?

“I am here, Hyfrith.” He rubs his face in Lan Zhan’s robes, hoping to soothe him somehow, but he knows it’s no use.

Lan Zhan uncovers his face and looks up at the sky. He is crying silently.

“Wei Ying, I love you.”

“Lan Zhan,” he answers. “I am here.”

“Wei Ying.”

“Lan Zhan.”

“Wei Ying.” Wei Ying wonders how long they can keep this up. Probably forever. Their desire for the other one to hear is too great.

It is not until Lan Zhan looks down to him that he even realizes he’s crying too.

Lan Zhan’s breath hitches and a broken sob leaves his body as he holds Wei Ying close to his chest.

They cry into each other the rest of the night.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

It is until after sunrise, that Wei Ying, back in the burrow, cuddling Willow and wiping his tears in his fur, realizes what Lan Zhan said.

‘I love you.’

He doesn’t have the energy nor the emotional stability right now to think that through.

. . . . . . . . ..  ..  . ..  .. . . . . . .

Ten minutes later, he wonders to himself:

“Does this mean Lan Zhan is a cut-sleeve?”

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The next morning, he is woken up by another sudden thought:

“Does that mean I am a cut-sleeve?!”

Chapter Text

“So…”

“So?”

“So, what happened this morning?” Willow sits beside Wei Ying as the leader keeps watch over the warren’s lazy morning feeding. It is still early, and the sun isn’t scorching yet, and the rabbits graze the dew-covered leaves in bliss.

“What do you mean?” The black rabbit makes a conscious effort not to look at his friend and it shows. He keeps his eyes fixed in front, so unmoving it means he isn’t really seeing anything.

“I mean, the mumbling of human words when we were still deep in the night. I do not recognize the words, but you seemed… shaken.” Willow moved closer and nibbled at Wei Ying’s ear.

“Mn.” ‘Shaken’, sure.

“So?”

“So, what?”

“Hyinlé-Rah!” He yells, and it is so loud some rabbits turn their heads to them. “Do not try to evade the question!”

“When do I ever?” If he were human, he would be grinning smugly, and it would be enough to get whoever was trying to make him talk drop the subject; as a rabbit, this is not possible. His whole being is designed to be truthful, not hiding anything. He cannot help if his ears are raised or low, or if his fur stands in fear. Trying to hide his thoughts is useless, and yet Wei Ying tries. “Dear Willow, you know I live for honestly only, and I would die before daring to-“ Willow shoots him an unimpressed look.

“You’re worried.” Willow can see it in his neck, his paws. His legs are strained like he is about to jump and hurry away from elil. “It has to do with Hyfrith-Rah, does it not?”

At the naming of him, Wei Ying shivers.

“Hyinlé. Hyinlé, I am your friend. You can tell me anything.” The kind look in his eyes would be enough to bring Wei Ying to his knees. It reminds him of Wen Ning, somehow. Well, Wen Ning before he poisoned the Wen’s sibling life with his existence- “I may not know what humans go through, but I will listen.” Willow keeps going. “You are not only my respected leader but my closest friend, my ally, whom I trust with my life, whom I thank Frith for bringing into the burrow-“

The guilt wins over Wei Ying.

“IaminlovewithHyfrith.”

“Er, what?”

“I… I am in love with Hyfrith.” He is looking down, trembling from head to toe. This is embarrassing, and terrible, and great, and it fills him with so much emotion he cannot contain it. The energy inside him needs an outlet and he can’t help but feel and feel and feel.

“Ah, yes. What about that?”

“What do you mean, what about that?!” He turns to Willow, ears raised in offense. “I am trusting you my biggest dilemma, and you act like-“

“Like?”

“Like you already knew.”

“I did know.” Willow looks at him strangely and then gasps. “You didn’t know?!”

“No!”

“But- You and him- And the kit- Weren’t you mates?!”

“I’ve told you already, he wasn’t even my friend! Or, well,” he remembers yesterday, hearing kind words from Lan XiChen, calling him Lan Zhan’s friend, beloved, most precious. “We- I- It was so complicated!” He moans. “I don’t even know anymore!”

“You are the dumbest rabbit to ever exist.” Willow deadpans.

“How dare you! I thought you were my friend!”

“That was before you told me you didn’t even recognize your own feelings! Or is this a human thing?”

Wei Ying considers lying to him, but in the end, he just drops to the floor in defeat.

“No.” He mumbles against the floor. “I was just like this before, too. Bad memory, bad mind, ayia, I had it so hard.”

“You mean, everyone around you had it hard. How did you even survive?!”

“Well, I clearly didn’t.” He pouts. Willow beings hitting him in the face.

“Stop!” Hit. “Making!” Hit. “Those!” Hit. “Comments!” Hit. “Now, be serious.” He crouches next to Wei Ying. “You really didn’t know you loved him.”

Wei Ying shakes his head.

“Well, now that you know, what are you going to do about it?”

“Nothing?”

“Why? You- Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I am sorry. I know being a rabbit limits you.”

“What? No, I mean- It’s not because I am a rabbit-“

“What, you were planning on seducing Hyfrith-Rah as a rabbit?” He snorts. “Make him your mate? Have other kits? Share a place in the burrow?” Willow mistakes his silence for agreement. “Frithrah, Hyinlé! Were you-“

“No!” Wei Ying jumps back and shakes his full body. “No, no! It just- We are- were both men.” He sighs, looking up to the sky.

To think this is the same sky that he saw in his youth. The same stars, the same moon, the same greenery he saw from the windows. So static, so permanent. He has changed so much since then, in body and spirit, and it is so, so confusing.

He is used to being certain of things, demonic cultivation needs to be done perfectly, and he used to know so many things! So smart, so bright! So much potential, everyone said.

Being a rabbit was a window to more knowledge, and, besides being healing, it has been enlightening. So much knowledge of nature and the earth, the new perspective, the new love that flows around him. He still suffers about his past life, and yet he comforted himself in believing his death had, if not fixed, lessened his former friends and family’s pain.

To find out that it wasn’t was heartbreaking.

To find out Lan Zhan suffered his departure, that he cried for him, was almost beyond comprehension.

And then, trying to understand he also loved Wei Ying, in all the sense of the word, it turned the world upside down. It meant the last, at least, five years of Wei Ying’s life had been a lie. That he had been wrong. And then came the doubt, if he was wrong in that, then how much of what he did was wrong?

He knew the most of it, yes, but the feeling of unrest was eating him.

He tried to steer his thought away and found himself in yet another shock: his own feelings.

Looking back to his younger years was the easiest part. With his newfound maturity, he could see it clearly, he loved him then. And as he thought more and more about it, he liked Lan Zhan, too, now.

He liked him so much. And it was so frustrating!

Not only had he been making his life harder by not relying on Lan Zhan before his death, but he also flirted with women when he liked men!

Or liked Lan Zhan when he flirted with women?

Ah, it was impossible to unravel!

“Hyinlé?

“I know that that is not important to rabbits,” he huffs. “Even El-Ahrairah took bucks as lovers, and among humans, it is not unheard, but I-“

Willow presses himself against his side, and Wei Ying is grateful for the comfort.

“I thought I only ever liked does- or women, or whatever. I never thought I’d-“ He stops and turns to Willow. “How did you know?”

“Your eyes.” He says. “You look at him like he placed the stars in the sky.” Wei Ying would like to say he doubted that, but if someone came to him and told him Lan Zhan moved the moon he would believe them.

“He loved me.” Wei Ying confesses. “I found out yesterday. He was mourning me. Or, he was mourning No Envies. I am Hyinlé. And Hyfrith loved No Envies. Like- a mate.” If he were human, he’d be blushing.

“You are saying you love Hyfrith and Hyfrith loves you back. I see no problems.”

“The problem is,” Wei Ying huffs in frustration, feeling his whole body tense up. “I am not No Envies. I will never again be him. I am a rabbit and he is a human, and he doesn’t know it is me.”

“Then tell him!”

Wei Ying looks at him scandalized.

“Are you insane?! They’d kill me! They’d say I made a dark deal to possess this body and tricked Hyfrith into helping me! Which is even worse, because I would ruin his reputation for nothing!”

“It is not nothing,” Willow snaps. “It is you and your feelings-“

“Nothing.” Wei Ying snaps back. “I am alive. I have had a family, and I have friends who love me. I have food and somewhere warm to spend the night. I am living. And that is more than I had before.” He curls up unconsciously, trying to seem smaller. “This new information is another blessing for Frith, nothing more, nothing less. I get to understand now, and I get to feel a fraction of the love I-“

What can he say?

The love he deserved?

The love that could have been given to him?

The love he didn’t know existed until less than a day ago?

It is all unfair, and yet it is more than he ever expected.

“I cannot ask for more.” He finishes. “I will not ask for more. I will stay here, for what is, is what must be. I will be a rabbit. I will love Hyfrith as a rabbit. And he will never, never find out. He doesn’t deserve that pain.”

Willow stares at him, black eyes burning into him.

“I know you don’t approve.” He says softly, wishing to ease the tension between them.

“I do not approve, no. But if- if that is what you wish, Hyinlé, I will support you.”

“Willow, I- Thank you-“

“I think you’re being dumber than a squirrel, of course. But then again, I am your friend, so there’s really no telling who is dumber.”

Wei Ying laughs.

“You’re absolutely right. You are the dumb one of the two.”

“Sure thing, Hyinlé-Rah, Eluelil, Prince of Not Knowing Romance if it Hit You in the Face.”

“Willow!”

“No? You don’t like it?” Willow laughs and jumps back, inviting Wei Ying to a game of chase. “How about ‘Prince of a Thousand Lost Memories’? Mn? My prince of Loving Bucks and Does?”

“Prince of keep talking and I will kick your ass!” Wei Ying jumps towards his friend laughing, missing him by millimeters.

“Only if you catch me!”

They begin running after each other, and soon the warren joins them in their fun.

It may not be all clear, Wei Ying thinks, in the midst of his loving family, but at least he’s not alone this time.

Chapter Text

If you asked Hyinlé what he missed the most of his human life, he would speak of the taste of spices and Emperor’s Smile. He would tell you all about swimming in the lotus ponds and feeling the water between his toes. He would explain to you the joy of playing his dizi, of creating beautiful noise like magic, his fingers memorizing the path over the holes in the bamboo stick.

Sometimes, if you were lucky, he would tell you of the people. He would laugh and tell you of Zornhrair-Rah, his brother of a different doe, and his explosive temperament. He would speak of his older sister, Éveeratha, the Happy Heart, and all the goodness she brought.

If he was on a good mood, he’d wax poetry about Hyfrith-Rah; of his sun-shone eyes and his voice like purring thunder. Of how, in his youth, he’d chase and tease, of all his pranks to his now-beloved.

He’d rarely mention cultivation.

Not that they don’t try! Willow is incredibly interested in this; he prances around Hyinlé and pushes: what is it? Why do it? How to do it?

Hyinlé shakes his head and repeats his answers again and again.

“It is a human thing, do not trouble yourself.”

In reality, Wei Ying has no idea how to explain cultivation to a rabbit.

Rabbits are not made the way humans have! They care not for immortality or legacies. Their legends focus on survival, not goodness or righteousness. How to elaborate about swords who deserve respect, swords you fly on, when rabbits care not for tools to help their work?

It is all too complicated, even more so when he knows questions will evolve into ‘What kind of cultivation did you do?’ and Wei Ying is not ready for that.

He is still not ready to tell this new family who loves him, respects him, and treasures him about all the mistakes he made.

Even then, is not cultivation that he misses. Not really.

He misses the sense of belonging that came with it. The power it gave him, the advantages that came with it. He misses unsheathing his sword and knowing that he would eradicate evil.

As a human, good and bad ended up so twisted, so difficult; being a rabbit is like a vacation for morality. Nothing a rabbit does can be classified as moral or immoral. It just is.

 ‘What is, is what must be.’ Mother said, when he was younger, and oh, what a beautiful realization that was.

So Wei Ying, Hyinlé, takes a deep breath and shoves cultivation and morality and murder in the back of his mind and goes back to taking care of his kin. It is breathing clean air after years of dark poison, and he will take advantage of it all that he can.

In the end, it seems whatever he tries to send away will come back with a vengeance, because he ends up being thrown in the middle of a night hunt with no active means of defense.

It begins weeks earlier when one of the Owsla reports smelling death in the borders of the forest, and the smell of rot comes closer each day. Strange footmarks on the forest floor, branches pushed out the way with too much violence, Wei Ying ignores it, lying to himself as much as he can.

It is when he is on patrol, Willow hopping faithfully at his side, that he sees them for the first time in years.

The smell hits him so strongly he retches, and Willow is not much better.

He mumbles questions, but they stop when a corpse steps out of the bushes, shambling as he advances slowly but surely.

Wei Ying’s body goes into full alert, ears raised and legs ready to jump. Willow senses it and asks.

“Hyinlé-Rah, is that an elil?”

“It is, for us, for now.” He answers cryptically. “It is dead, do not bother it and it should be on its way.”

 “But death does not move.” Willow eyes the corpse frantically. “Death is stillness and earth.”

“Not for them. Not if they’re called back.”

“But how?”

“Cultivation.” Willow’s eyes go wide. He knew humans could call those not yet at peace, as Hyfrith-Rah does, but to have them stand and walk, moan and growl as this one does, it is unnatural.

While Willow analyses the situation, Wei Ying’s instincts kick in: he searches for resentful energy to order this corpse and whoever goes with him to get the Fuck away, but an animal’s body, especially one so small, cannot handle it.

The dark energy thrums through his veins, seizes his heart and tightens around it. It pulses in his brain like a migraine, it revolves through his guts, squirming like a worm.

Wei Ying tries to think besides what pains he feels, but he cannot. Before any thought or order can go through, his body gives up and lets go of the energy. It is a miracle that he can call it with a rabbit’s body.

Wei Ying falls forward, dizzy and weakened. Willow shivers at the sight of him.

“Hyfrith-rah?”

“We need to go.” He mumbles. “We- The warren, we need to go underground. Now.” He tries to stand, but his legs will not support him. He falls flat again. The warren needs to hide, right away. Corpses mean cultivators, and cultivators mean fights, and fights mean disruption of peace, and the rabbits will be in danger. He doesn’t want to think about a cultivator missing a shot or hit and killing his kin accidentally.

“Hyinlé?” Willow nuzzles at his cheek, worried. He covers him with his body and eyes the corpse. If needed, he will die for Hyinlé, out of love and responsibility.

“Willow, I am fine. It’s just-“ Just what? A little dark energy boiling my blood, burning my mind, stopping me from any rational thought? He’s lucky the paranoia comes only with constant use. He does not want to doubt Willow or his warren like he doubted Lan Zhan. “I am just having trouble walking, but I am fine. Go to the warren and get everyone inside the burrow.  Do not move from there until I go back. But if I don’t-“

“Hyinlé-Rah!”

“Listen to me, if I do not come back in three days you are to give Wolfberry-Rah full control. He will take good care of us.”

Willow’s whiskers tremble.

“Willow, go.” He orders calmly. He wants, needs Willow to go now. He doesn’t know if living corpses attack animals, never really cared to check, but he cannot take risks.

As Willow runs, Hyinlé takes a few moments to collect himself, then he tries to stand again. With Willow gone, he allows himself to sway as he steadies himself. He does not have to appear strong right now, just survive.

Survive and ensure the survival of others.

Just like with the Wens.

He hops over to the corpse, carefully trailing behind him to study him. He takes deep breaths to keep his thoughts clear through his headache.

He moves to see the corpse from up front, analyzing his movements.

It’s just like Yiling, just like Yiling… He tells himself. Back then he had control, and he does so now. He is still the Yiling Patriarch, underneath the soft fluff and the cutesy ears.

He can still make a lot of damage.

The corpse suddenly stills and when Wei Ying looks up to it, it’s white eyes are on him.

He hops to one side, slowly. The corpse moves its head to follow the movement.

Ah, shit.

He begins walking away from the Cloud Recesses, hoping the corpse will follow him.

And it does.

It must be the resentful energy around him, he reasons. It must be strange to see a little bundle of darkness hoping around you. But the energy is already dissipating, and he needs to get the corpse further away. He concentrates again on the surge of energy that reeks off the corpse, whirling it towards himself.

This time, the effects lessen. Or perhaps he is more accustomed to it.

At the lack of Chenqin, he begins humming. Or what would pass for rabbit singing. He grunts and purrs ups and downs.

He concentrates on calming, soothing sounds. He doesn’t want the corpse turning violent, lest he hurts him or turns around and attacks any Gusu disciple.

Thankfully it is now dark enough that there will be no sect member out, much less in the forest. If he’s lucky he’ll manage to lead it away and then go back to his burrow and forget about the whole damn thing…

The voices of men shouting orders make him shiver and lose concentration, and the corpse turns its head towards the noise. He chirps louder, calling its attention. If the yelled orders are to be trusted, this is a night hunt, which means the corpse will be killed and the elil threat destroyed.

He can only hope Lan Zhan is not here. Lan Zhan has an uncanny sixth sense for sensing demonic energy, and if he feels it coming from a rabbit… Experimentation isn’t always kind for the subject, this Wei Ying knows very well.

He needs to get away quickly. He hops to a side of the path he was taking, but to his dismay, the corpse follows. And the faster he moves, the faster the corpse does too. Curse resentful energy! His plan worked too well.

“It’s getting away!” Someone yells, and Wei Ying squeals in horror. They’re so near! He forgets himself and begins running, the corpse following close behind.

The chase begins, the corpse behind Wei Ying and the cultivators behind it. He zigzags in hopes of slowing it down, but it barely helps. The corpse begins grunting, the rush of activity making him move more violently.

Oh, how he wishes he could just turn around and fight. He wishes he had fingers to hold a sword, and a golden core for the sword to be Suibian. He wishes he could turn back time and not be as defenseless as he is now.

Then, the gentle thrum of a guqin quiets down every noise in the forest. Wei Ying stills completely, as do the rest of the chasing caravan.

Lan WangJi stands tall and proud, guqin in hand.

The Lan cultivators take the chance to attack and destroy the corpse, but Wei Ying doesn’t take his eyes off Lan Zhan; he looks beautiful in the moonlight. Ethereal and divine. Every piece the holy creature every mortal believes him to be.

Lan Zhan goes to the cultivators, who report to him what they saw.

“It was strange, HanGuang-Jun.” One says. “It was walking towards the Cloud Recesses, and suddenly changed directions.”

“Could it be it was following orders?”

“What could a single corpse do against the GusuLan clan? It’s a terrible plan!”

“It started running out of nowhere!”

“And it stopped the same way too!”

Lan Zhan looks away from the men and begins studying the corpse. He doesn’t touch it, just slightly moves his head to change perspectives. He also looks around, looking for whatever stopped the corpse.

Lan Zhan’s eyes meet Wei Ying, who is still frozen in his spot.

He frowns.

“A-Ying.” He calls and Wei Ying’s ears shot upwards to the sound. He relaxes a little bit, Lan Zhan is always safe for him, but he dares not move towards his arms. He still feels the demonic energy in him, how it dragged the corpse as he ran. It clings to his tendons and his fur, leaving him heavy like he was doused with water.

Lan Zhan walks up to him and picks him up, oh, so slowly. Presses him against his chest, where Wei Ying can hear that his heart is not as still as his face. He must have run all the way here to help the other cultivators.

“It is late.” He tells the men, and they all leave, following Lan Zhan.

As they near the Recesses, Lan Zhan changes Wei Ying from his chest to his hands and hides him in his sleeves.

Wei Ying’s rabbit instincts are pleased with the hiding place, covering him and his scent with sweet sandalwood, but his thoughts race.

Why would Lan Zhan hide him?

His question is answered as he is not brought to the rabbit’s area, but into Lan Zhan’s own room.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The jingshi is exactly the way Wei Ying always thought it’d be: clean and so empty it hurts.

He’s even surprised at the table and books that are around.

Lan Zhan places him carefully in the ground and walks away, turning on candles as he goes, and Wei Ying takes the opportunity to investigate; he hops to the table and takes a deep breath. He is amazed at his own sense of smell; he can even tell how old the paper is, how fresh the ink. He loves how everything has the sandalwood smell he has learned to relate to Lan Zhan.

He stands on his back legs to see over the table, barely managing to reach. He huffs. Being so damn small has its downsides. He jumps on top of the table.

He studies the papers under his paws carefully.

He can still read, and these are just letters. He skims over them, not caring for diplomatic meetings and politics. Also, because he is much more curious about some really odd smelling paper. He moves the documents with his nose as he searches, eyeing the ink bottle carefully. He wouldn’t want to make a mistake and spill it.

He finally finds what he’s looking for, under all the papers, like Lan Zhan hid it at the bottom.

He pushes the uninteresting work out of the way to properly study the object of his attention. He can even smell it more clearly from here: it is years old and hasn’t been touched by a lot of people, only Lan Zhan, and one other unknown smell. It also smells like the inside of books and dark, probably kept inside one while Lan Zhan doesn’t have it in his desk.

Because he cannot tell much more from smell alone, so he stands on his forelegs again to read whatever it says.

He’s surprised not to find words but long lines.

It is a drawing. A drawing of Lan Zhan, no less, from his younger years.

It is beautiful, done professionally and carefully. Whoever took the time to draw this was very good and placed a lot of intent into it.

Realization hits him suddenly.

He, Wei Ying, did this drawing.

He can see it clearly, remembers every stroke, every sneak peek at Lan Zhan’s unmoving form.

Lan Zhan kept his drawing, even when he called it ridiculous at the time.

His heart clenches as he moves forward and places his paw over drawing-Lan Zhan’s cheek like he’d wanted to do when he was making this gift.

Lan Zhan kept it, all these years. It means to Wei Ying more than he could ever explain.

It also means Lan Zhan liked him since they were kids, which is hilarious and painful. How the hell did he manage to charm the Second Jade of Lan while being a fucking nuisance?

A gasp pulls him off his thoughts, as Lan Zhan almost runs up to him. He is picked up and placed inside a box, which Lan Zhan brought with him. He’d be offended if he wasn’t moved by Lan Zhan’s loving touch: he’s leaned over the table, frantically studying his drawing. Does he think Hyinlé scratched it? Tore through it? Messed it up with dirty paws?

It’s pretty cute when he sighs in relief when he realizes the drawing is fine.

He picks it up carefully and places it inside a book, and the book goes into the shelves. He then takes Wei Ying, and the whole box he was confined into and moves it to the side of his bed. He is left there as Lan Zhan gets ready to sleep.

Why would Lan Zhan take him inside, he wonders? He must have a very good reason, considering he’s breaking like, five rules. It probably has to do with the night hunt. Did he pick up on the demonic energy in him?

The lights are blown out and Wei Ying makes the decision to not overthink this.

Whatever must be, will be. Whatever Lan Zhan decides to do to him will be fair and just, and completely deserved. He also has given Willow orders so the warren will be taken care of.

He has, as one would say, his business in order.

If he will die, fine. If not, well, there are worse fates than being kept in Lan Zhan’s private rooms.

Lan Zhan returns to the bed in sleeping robes, without his forehead ribbon, and Wei Ying gasps. He looks incredibly different, which should be ridiculous. The ribbon is but a piece of cloth, and yet without it, Lan Zhan looks much more approachable. He looks like an ordinary man, instead of a heavenly member of the GusuLan clan. Well, a very, very, very beautiful ordinary man. One that would have every maiden falling for him, even more than he does now if that were possible.

Lan Zhan picks him up from the box, and his hands are cold because of the water with which he washed his face. He sits on the bed, and for once he’s not perfectly straight. He puts Wei Ying in his lap and holds him still with both hands and begins pouring spiritual energy into him.

 The flow is so sudden and foreign, he tries to jump away, but Lan Zhan keeps him still, gently but firmly. Wei Ying would think Lan Zhan was trying to heal him if he didn’t know better. He needs a golden core for that to work, and yet the spiritual energy does something.

It feels so strange, having “clean” energy inside, when just a few moments ago he was filled to the brim with the demonic one.

Wei Ying had never considered giving spiritual energy to an animal, but then again, he had never heard of an animal working with resentful energy. He is the first one.

This means it’s Lan Zhan’s first time doing this too. Does he even know what he’s doing?

Maybe only in theory… Ah, if Wei Ying could study this, he’d be so happy!

He misses his investigations, his notebooks with notes about demonic cultivation. Learning had always been a joy, whatever the result.

He gets used to the feeling of Lan Zhan’s energy inside him pretty quickly and begins to relax. Lan Zhan still holds him, but Wei Ying no longer wants to move. The pleasant vibration inside of him, replacing resentful energy with comfort and warmth begins to lull him. It feels good and it feels familiar, and he is so tired…

He falls asleep in Lan Zhan’s hands, and dreams.

Chapter Text

Wei Ying hates dreaming as a rabbit.

His thoughts lose all rationality and replay randomly important moments of his life. But important doesn’t always mean happy, as he’s come to learn.

His sleep ends up being a roll of a 20-sided dice, where there are only one in twenty chances of not having a nightmare, and there’s nothing that stops them.

Even so, it is not his own dream that wakes him up.

Lan Zhan is the one who practically shoots out of bed, gasping in terror.

“Wei Ying!” He calls, startling Hyinlé. He jumps in his own place, ears shot in alert. His heart is beating like a wild horse.

He listens as Lan Zhan drops himself back, huffing a breath as his back hits the mat. He is panting.

He can hear Lan Zhan’s own heart, and whatever it is he dreamt, it left him very upset.

Hyinlé chirps.

“Hyfrith.” He stands in his forelegs to look over the edge of the box. Lan Zhan is still lying on his back, with his face turned towards Wei Ying. He moves his nose because he knows Lan Zhan thinks it is cute. “Hyfrith, breathe. All is well.”

Lan Zhan’s heart is not slowing down. Hyinlé’s whiskers twitch, and he begins jumping to get out of the box. This calls Lan Zhan’s attention. He stands up and walks up to him and picks him up.

When he sits back in the bed, Hyinlé jumps from his arms and studies the mat. He sniffs and presses with his paws. It smells nice, like Lan Zhan, and is comfortable enough.

Lan Zhan leans back and lies down. Hyinlé jumps on top of his chest and Lan Zhan huffs a breath.

“I’m not that heavy, Hyfrith.” He mocks, but he guesses he allowed himself the noise. After all, there is no one here he needs to impress. He is honored to have HanGuang Jun so relaxed all to himself, somehow. Hyinlé curls in the space right between Lan Zhan’s ribs. It’s a good spot. He rises with every breath, and Lan Zhan’s heart beats so strongly Hyinlé can feel it beneath him. He will be aware of every movement Lan Zhan makes, and can easily wake him up if it is another nightmare.

Surprisingly, Lan Zhan doesn’t go back to sleep. He stays still for Hyinlé, but his eyes never close again for the rest of the night.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And it doesn’t seem to affect him.

Lan Zhan is up at five, like every day, perfectly done way before Hyinlé is even fully awake.

He feels the brush of fine fingers over his back. He purrs at Hyfrith.

“A-Ying.” He calls, and Hyinlé purrs louder. The fingers have moved to his face and he nuzzles into them. He is picked up and carried away. He allows this happily.

He goes back to sleep, and when he wakes up, he is being settled into Lan Zhan’s lap at the breakfast table. He chirps as he raises his head.

He looks over the table and barely manages not to fall back down in laughter. Every single member of the GusuLan Clan is staring at Lan Zhan, eyes wide and shocked.

The only ones who are acting as if nothing is happening are Lan Zhan’s family, and that is only because Lan QiRen is doing an extraordinary effort not to look at them, and Lan XiChen is enjoying this immensely: he keeps passing Lan Zhan vegetables from under the table.

A junior disciple raises his hand:

“HanGuang Jun, you have-“

Three righteous pairs of eyes focus on him, shutting him up entirely.

“No talking while eating.” They say in unison, effectively making everyone keep eating and minding their own business. The Lan family is each passing day more fun; Wei Ying thinks, as he settles back into Lan Zhan’s lap, comfortably preparing for another nap. It’s good I got to see this.

He is woken up again by the three men talking. He raises his head and pays attention.

“…doesn’t explain why.” Lan XiChen is saying.

“If this is some kind of new method of demonic cultivation, we need to be ready. Is there anything else you saw?”

“A-Ying was scared.” Lan Zhan answers his brother. “The chase upset him. It is not a practical method.”

“Of course not! It is the worst method. You cannot control an animal in its entirety, much less a wild rabbit. It is not safe for anyone, even the cultivator.”

“Indeed.” XiChen sighs and looks away. “Until we find out what or who is behind this, we’ll have to limit the rabbits’ space, as well. WangJi, you’ll keep cleansing A-Ying, yes? Oh!” His eyes lock on the Hyinlé, who cannot help the tensing of his muscles at being seen by another. He’d think knowing it is Lan XiChen would soothe his worries, but it does seem he’ll only ever feel at total ease with Lan Zhan and A-Yuan. “He’s woken up.”

Lan Zhan is immediately by his side, offering him a carrot.

It is not every day he is offered a carrot! Sweet as candy, Wei Ying takes his time enjoying it. He’s surprised to realize he doesn’t think spice could make it better.

Once again, he is picked up and carried away, and he is given a full tour as he accompanies Lan Zhan for the day. He stays in his arms during his classes, being held by one hand while Lan Zhan writes the information the disciples need.

With the younger kids, he is passed around and pet whenever a kid answers correctly. It seems this motivates the children immensely, all doing their very best for the day to be allowed to hold the cute, black bunny, but Wei Ying is happy to know it is A-Yuan who holds him the most. His boy is so smart and so clever! Hyinlé is very proud.

During a small time of recess, he gets to meet famous Lan JingYi, and he likes the child so much. He is as energetic as his precious Nizenroo but much more rebellious. He must have not been born inside the Cloud Recesses, because he still laughs loud and free.

As much as Hyinlé cowers at the loud sound, he is happy the children are happy here.

He is very happy this day: he is with Lan Zhan and A-Yuan, and eating sweet vegetables, and being pet and loved like he doesn’t remember ever been. It is such a joyous day he can’t help but feel disappointed when Lan Zhan gets him back to the enclosure.

At the border between open space and forest, Wei Ying sees Willow, keeping guard and waiting for him. He has no doubt Willow has been there since last night, waiting for his leader.

His heart clenches, he chirps a hello.

Willow races from his hiding spot.  

“Hyinlé-Rah! Oh, thank Frith you’re alive! We’ve been so worried! Hyinlé, Hyinlé! Are you fine? Are you hurt?”

Lan Zhan places him on the floor, and Wei Ying moves to nuzzle and lick Willow’s face in a soothing manner.

“I am fine, I am fine. I’ve been with Hyfrith all this time. He took good care of me.” He steps back to see his Owsla Leader more firmly. “Is everyone alright?”

“We haven’t left the burrow, as you ordered. Everyone is safe.” A knot untangles in Wei Ying’s heart. Everyone is safe.

“Good. I have new orders, I’ll give them when we’re all together.” Willow nods and begins moving towards their warren. Wei Ying is about to follow him when he turns back and sees Lan Zhan staring.

Wei Ying wonders how will his human sleep this night. Will he have another nightmare? Who will settle him down after it? Who can soothe and calm his racing heart? His eyes look so lonely, now.

Wei Ying is a rabbit. A wild rabbit, in charge of a warren. Lives are at stake here; he cannot abandon them. He promised mother and Narnflay-Rah. He has responsibilities, as Lan Zhan has his.

He turns and leaves, heart heavy.

He has rabbit things to do.

Chapter Text

A-Yuan is one of Wei Ying’s favorite people. Always has been, always will be.

He is so, so grateful at Lan Zhan for taking him in, for raising him and loving him like the child deserves. He is so lucky he even got to see his little one grow!

Lan Yuan is ten years old now! He’s such a big boy, his face is much more defined than it was when he was a baby. Sometimes, Wei Ying can see some of Wen Ning’s and Wen Qing’s face in it. It’s both painful and soothing, seeing his friends in his baby’s face.

Wei Ying is on his sixth spring now, and it amazes everyone. Who, from the Yiling Warren, knew that rabbits could live so long? They all attribute it to Frith’s kindness, but Wei Ying knows his science a little better and is thankful for the nutritious food and lack of elil. Their lives are so good!

He is bigger now, too! Bigger than Narnthlay-Rah ever was. Big enough that when A-Yuan picks him up, he is held like a plush toy, no longer fitting in his hands. Wei Ying is fine with this; it just means there’s more of him to pet! 

Lan Yuan has the habit of going down in the evenings to play around them, sometimes Lan Zhan comes, but it’s less and less often. Wei Ying misses him but quiets down his worries and thoughts. What business has a rabbit begging for the attention of one like HanGuang-Jun? None. He is still lucky to see him, and still be a favorite!

One particular evening, Lan Yuan sits down and, after Hyinlé has settled down in his lap, begins speaking out loud.

“It will be terrible.” He huffs. Hyinlé looks up to see his little boy pouting. “A-Ying,” he calls. “I wish I was a rabbit, so I could stay here and play all day and not be a host and be forced to follow rules. Father says they’re important, but they’re so silly sometimes.” Wei Ying understands maybe half of the rant, but like hell he’ll interrupt the kid. At least he’s getting out his frustrations! It’s better than keeping them bottled up until you die. “Sometimes I just wanna run, or yell, or make a mess! But, not a bad mess, just, not be checking every little time something’s out of its place, it’s time-consuming.” He enunciates carefully. Clearly, Lan Zhan taught him that one. “And, worse! Next week I won’t be able to come to play because the Jiang Sect will be coming to drop disciples, and this time, the Sect Leader is coming and he’s bringing his nephew with him!”

Wei Ying’s blood freezes.

Jiang Cheng is coming. Jin RuLan is coming.

They’re coming next week.

And Wei Ying is a rabbit.

It all comes down to that, doesn’t it? Guilty or not, pained or not, he is a rabbit. An animal.  

Whatever will he do, besides not doing anything at all? It’s not like he can go and hop on Jiang Cheng until he understands. In any case, he doesn’t even want that! He’s not suicidal! He likes his life here, and it’s not like he’s bothering anyone, right? He’s moved like, one corpse since he was born again, and it was for a good cause!

A-Yuan is still talking when Wei Ying finishes his train of thought.

“I’ve never met Jin RuLan. They say he’s mean and fussy and I don’t want to be the one to “keep an eye on him”. Uncle says that I’m the logical option because we’re closest in age, but I still don’t want to.” Wei Ying is this close to jumping away and demanding his child be left to his own matters. How dare Lan XiChen not take his child’s words? Listen to him? “Father says I can bring JingYi with me, and we’ll be hosts for the Jiangs. He says that if I want, I can bring them both to see you and the rabbits, but if it’s true that Jin RuLan is like that,” he says with absolute disdain. “I don’t want him around you all. I fear he’ll scare you. Or worse, he might bring a dog with him! He’ll scare you all for good, then!” He seems so distraught.

Wei Ying allows his child to hug him close, ignoring the instinct that warns against being pressed too tight. He even licks at the side of his head.

Whatever happens, he’ll help his kit deal with it.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The week of preparations passes by in what seems seconds.

More food is brought, for both the Jiang and Jin disciples who’ll stay for the educative system, and for the Sect Leader.

Wei Ying has taken his own precautions. He’s told the rabbits beforehand that there may be new people around. Those who are willing to meet these people are encouraged to hang around and be visible. Young kits and those with a heavier distrust should stay in the burrows.

When the time comes, it is a third of the mixed warrens that come out to see the new disciples pass.

They are mostly ignored, even as some animal-loving kids do point at them with sparkling eyes. Wei Ying knows that he would have been the first one to jump into the enclosure to play around.

He also knows the rabbits would have hated him. 

It is after dinner that Lan Yuan comes, accompanied by two other figures.

“Nizenroo is here!” Willow tells the warren, who all raise their heads to see their little prince. Delighted chirps can be heard all around.

“These are the rabbits,” A-Yuan says, looking over them proudly. At his right, JingYi’s eyes are wide open, taking in the view of fluff and ears that lies before them.

“They’re so cute….” He mumbles, and some rabbits giggle at his tone. The now know how to separate good noises from bad noises, and Wei Ying has explained that humans find them extremely cute.

On A-Yuan’s left, farther away and wearing a scowl, Jin RuLan says:

“Dogs are cuter.”

His tone is cold enough that several rabbits raise their ears at that. He sounds angry, so he’s dangerous. Willow hops over.

“Hyinlé, who are the kits?”

“Litter mates of Nizenroo.” He lies. “They’ve never been around rabbits before, so we must be patient with them.”

Both Lan kids seem displeased with Jin RuLan’s comment, but they ignore it. They seem to have practice doing that.

“If you want to hold them,” his kit is saying. “You must wait for them to come to you. They have to see they can trust you.” They all sit down, and some braver rabbits follow Wei Ying into the boys’ space.

Wei Ying sniffs both new kids. He’s met JingYi before, of course, but he’s older now, and his smell is less of a baby and more of a grown up.

Jin RuLan smells of dog and danger. It is terribly overpowering. He can’t help a whine from the back of his throat, and the kid notices.

“What?” He growls at the rabbit.

Hyinlé’s instincts take over as he flees his nephew’s presence and burrows himself in his kid’s robes.

“A-Yuan,” JingYi giggles. “That one likes you a lot.”

“Mn! A-Ying is my father’s favorite! He’s really friendly!”

“Not that much.” Jin RuLan murmurs, and Wei Ying almost feels bad. He does want to be around him, but the kid is making it hard, and there is only so much Wei Ying can fight against his base instincts. In the end, they always win.

“Give him time.” Lan Yuan says. “It the first time they see you, after all.”

After seeing their leader hide away, his warren as not moved an inch. They will stay still until Wei Ying declares it all to be safe.

A-Yuan passes Hyinlé to JungYi’s arms and he pulls out a carrot and offers it to Willow.

Willow looks at Hyinlé, asking for permission and reassurance.

“They’re okay, just be wary. They’re still kits and may not know their own strength.”

Willow takes the carrot and munches happily, and the rest of the warren moves closer.

Jin RuLan stretches his arms to pick Lily Pond, a younger female from the Hrair Hain warren up, when A-Yuan stops him grabbing his wrist.

“Let them get used to you before touching them.”

“You gave that one to Lan JingYi.” He accuses.

“A-Ying already knows A-Yi. You are new here. None of us know you.” Wei Ying can’t tell very well what it is about the statement, but it seems to have struck a nerve on the kid. Must have hit on some insecurity Jin RuLan already has. His cheeks get red and he clenches his fists. His eyes get watery.

Wei Ying had lived with Jiang Cheng enough time to recognize a Jiang temper tantrum when he sees one.

The rabbits stop and sniff the air. They can sense the change of atmosphere, and it all smells like salt-water and anger. They get ready to run, but Wei Ying orders them to stay still. It won’t do much good if Jin RuLan starts yelling, but it’s the least he can do.

Amazingly, Jin RuLan explodes in a different way. 

“I don’t like rabbits.” He declares, his voice steadier than a kid’s should be. “I don’t like it here, and I don’t like you.” He stands up and leaves, stomping his feet. His voice was venomous, but Wei Ying could see through the bark.

That kid is just like Jiang Cheng, wow.

The Lan kids seem taken aback and don’t move until A-Yuan stands up and runs after him.

“Jin RuLan!” He calls, and JingYi stands up, pushing Wei Ying out of the way with a single move, and rushes after him.

“A-Yuan, you can’t run!” He says as he, too, runs.

“What happened?” Willow asks. Wei Ying shakes his head.

“Human kits being human kits. Let us hope they can fix it.” He stares at the running figures; he really does hope they can. He can only imagine how protective Jiang Cheng is of his sister’s son. If any harm came to him, he’d burn the world down in a minute.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

He knows not what will happen, so he carries on with his normal day. The warren plays and eats in the sun, they rest in the shadow, they groom each other and purr.

It is after the high noon when Lan Zhan comes to the enclosure, with the three children following him close behind. Lan Zhan doesn’t seem mad, but the kids look bashful. Wei Ying raises his head and hops happily to Lan Zhan’s figure. He feels much more at ease with him here, tranquil enough to be picked up with little to no warning from him.

Lan Zhan sits down, and the children follow suit. The rabbits move around them, trying to get into their Hyfrith’s lap as Hyinlé is.

“Rabbits are slow to trust.” Lan Zhan speaks, and the children stare attentively. “Patience is important. A-Yuan,” the kid turns to look at him. “Jin RuLan is new here, but trust can be gained. As can friendship.” The three kids perk up at the word. They all want to be friends, in the end. They really are just children, Wei Ying musses tenderly.  “Jin Ling.” Wei Ying gasps at the sound of his nephew’s name. It’s a good name! “We must understand that rabbits cannot be forced. If you must force love, then it is not love.” Lan Zhan sounds extremely bitter as he says this, but if the children notice, they don’t show it. “We must let them come around us,” they all look down at how the rabbits have moved closer than before. Without the children being tense around them, the ambiance is easier to approach. The warren feels at ease. “Rabbits know when we are dangerous to them. We must prove we harbor no bad feelings. We allow them to have their own rhythm.”  Willow stands in his forelegs, sniffing at Jin RuLan.

“Hyinlé, this one smells of dog and elil. Who is he?”

“The adopted kit of Zornhrair-Rah.”

“Then he is your family.”

“He is.” He says with a small voice. Jin RuLan, Jin Ling, looks so young like this.

He is eight years old, and already so angry. He has no mother or father to do what Lan Zhan is doing: to soothe and teach. Jiang Cheng, for all his might, cannot be there at all times. This child is alone, and it is Wei WuXian’s fault.

But he is fine, somehow. He has all ten fingers and toes and is dressed and fed and loved.

He is staring at Lan WangJi like he holds all the answers in the world. He probably does, but it doesn’t make Jin Ling look less adorable.

Lan Zhan talks again.

He is so quiet around the rabbits that Wei Ying tends to forget he is a teacher.

“Move your hands out of the way.” Jin Ling obeys immediately. Lan Zhan picks Hyinlé from his lap up to his eyes.

‘Behave,’ they seem to say. Wei Ying will do his very best. He does want to be near his nephew.

He is placed slowly in Jin RuLan’s lap, and the warren ooh’s and aah’s. ‘Hyinlé-Rah is so brave! Allowing to be put right where it smells like a dog.’ Wei Ying makes an extraordinary effort not to move.

This is not like being with XiChen or QiRen. They were adults, they would not harm him, not even by accident.

Jin Ling is a kid with a tendency for emotional outbursts, and he smells like dog.  

It is torture for the rabbit instincts.

But it is almost Heaven for Wei Ying. From this spot, he can perceive much better the kid’s smell from under the dog fur and slobber that covers his clothes. He can smell the lotus flowers in his hair, and the water in the dried tips of his sleeves. His wrists and slender fingers smell like spices. He adores this. He forces himself to relax, to get used to the foul smell until he can sense the true scent of his little nephew.

When he is finally settled, he chirps.

The warren sighs collectively in relief. JingYi and A-Yuan giggle. Even Lan Zhan relaxes.

“See, I told you!” A-Yuan puts his hands on Jin Ling’s arm and squeezes. “A-Ying is friendly!”

“Just needed time.” Lan Zhan adds, picking up Willow to pet.

“I think you can touch him now.” JingYi moves nearer to the other children, smiling too. “Just be gentle! He’s not a dog, he won’t like being rubbed.”

Jin Ling touches his fur very carefully. A single finger at first, then two, then three.

Wei Ying is ecstatic. He chirps and purrs, and it seems to calm his nephew. Soon the children talk and joke between them.

Wei Ying is just as pleased as Lan Zhan is that Lan Yuan has a new friend.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 

As much as Jiang Cheng likes Lan XiChen, he is more than happy to be rid of him. Their talk about the subjects his disciples would be taking took hours. How did father ever manage to do this without being bored to death, he’ll never know.

Lan XiChen is accommodating and kind, explaining even beyond what should be explained; he is also a master in talking about sensitive topics without souring a conversation.

In the end, they decided that they would teach about the end of the Sunshot Campaign, and leave the resulting situations to the teaching of the Jiang Sect, after their return.

This will at least give Jiang Cheng time to decide what exactly does he want to teach. Is the Yiling Patriarch a murderer or family? A villain or a victim? Not even Jiang Cheng is sure about these things, as much as he likes to pretend he does.

Anger is much easier to deal with than pain and guilt.

He leaves the conference room and asks a Lan disciple to point to him in the direction of Jin Ling. He missed his nephew; he is used to being able to see him, from a distance, at least, at all times. Not doing so makes him nervous. He’s lost so much family by not paying attention and he will not make those mistakes again.

New ones, sure. But not the ones from the past.

“They are in the enclosure, Sect Leader. Do you want me to take you there?” The disciple is so damn polite Jiang Cheng is both unnerved and jealous. His own disciples are both too scared to talk to him and too shameless to obey fully.  It sometimes feels like having 20 teenaged Wei WuXians. It is hell. He can sometimes understand his mother. Not her methods, entirely. But her anger, yes.

His is this close of whipping someone up if another fisherman comes with complaints of a disciple stealing a boat to pick up lotus’ seeds during training time.

“They?”

“HanGuang-Jun and the children.”

“Which children?”

“Lan Yuan and Lan JingYi.” The disciple is patient, gods-bless-him. Jiang Cheng had forgotten just how fucking virtuous Lans act. “HanGuang-Jun’s son and his friend?”

“Yes, yes, whatever. Take me there.” He’ll deal with ever-righteous Lan WangJi if he must. Whatever it takes to grab Jin Ling and get the fuck out of that rule-filled hell.

He is guided through several hallways into the border of the Cloud Recesses with the mountain forest. In the center clearing, Lan WangJi is sitting with three children, and they’re surrounded by rabbits.

Jiang Cheng almost chokes on his own spit.

Lan WangJi is dutifully picking up rabbits and passing them to the children, who are increasingly being buried by the animals. The children are laughing so loud they’re almost screaming, but the Second Jade of Lan is not hushing them. He even seems… Content.

Relaxed.

Jiang Cheng had never, ever seen Lan WangJi relaxed. Ever.

The disciple who took him there bowed and left, leaving it up to him to approach the little group.

He watches Jin Ling. He is roaring with laughter, his golden clothes stained with grass, but he’s reaching out to the Lan children. He’s bonding. He’s playing like he should.

Jiang Cheng’s got a knot on his throat. This is what Yanli would have wanted for him.

To be raised with others, to be raised laughing and enjoying, to be around other children and make lots of friends.

Lan WangJi meets his eyes, and they share a silent conversation:

‘You’re here.’

‘Yeah, but don’t tell him. Let him enjoy it.’

‘But, you’re here. And you’re his uncle.’

‘Do not tell him.’

‘Come play.’

‘Don’t you fucking dare interrupt him.’

Lan WangJi leans in and says something to Jin Ling. The child rises from his fluff cover and yells:

“Uncle! Uncle, come and see the rabbits!”

‘Fucking traitor.’

Jiang Cheng has never understood why Wei WuXian liked his precious Lan Zhan so much.

He walks down to the group and is promptly dragged down next to Jin Ling, who babbles about his great day with A-Yuan and A-Yi and how the rabbits are so great and so fluffy and really, Uncle, dogs are the best, but rabbits are a very, very close second and-

Jiang Cheng barely manages to follow his nephew’s one-sided conversation.

He can’t look away from Jin Ling’s face.

His little boy is smiling so hard, and his cheeks are flushed, and his hair is sticking to his forehead with sweat, and Jiang Cheng has never seen him happier. Jiang Cheng smiles back.

“Oh! Here, Uncle!” Jin Ling passes him the rabbit that is on his lap. It is huge, to say the least. All fluffy dark fur and long ears. Its dark eyes have a clever glint, but it seems happy enough to be manhandled by the eight-year-old. “We’ve been playing aaaall day! He is HanGuang-Jun’s favorite, but he let me hold him because he’s very friendly! If you let him get used to you and trust you,” these words are emphasized very carefully. “He’ll be your friend too! Carry him!” The rabbit is thrust into his arms. Damn, that thing is heavy!

As he maneuvers the rabbit to hold him more comfortably, he comments.

“I didn’t know HanGuang-Jun had so many rabbits.”

“Silly Uncle!” A-Ling must be in a really good mood if he’s talking like that, like a child and not a little Jin master. “All the rabbits are pets! Like Fairy!”  

“Pets?” He looks up at Lan WangJi and squints. “I thought it was against the rules to have pets.”

‘Ha! Take that, you pushover!’

“It is forbidden to cause the death of another. We care for the rabbits, whatever their relationship with the Cloud Recesses’ disciples.”

“You’re saying they’re the disciples’ rabbits?”

“No. They’re mine.”

“But they’re not pets.”

“No.”

“But you take care of them.”

“En.”

“Then-“

“Sect Leader Jiang,” one of the boys, the one closer to Lan WangJi calls timidly. “A pet sleeps inside. The rabbits live in their burrows.” The three Lans share a look.

Oh, they found a loophole. How fucking devious.

Jiang Cheng shakes his head. Whatever. A-Ling is in a good mood, and he gets to cuddle a fairly cute animal.

“Very well.” He concedes. He raises the black rabbit to look at his face again. “Good evening.” He tells him very formally, and Jin Ling laughs. He’s always liked that when they see dogs in the streets. To stop and exchange pleasantries with stray animals. “I am Sect Leader Jiang WanYin from the Lotus Pier. It is a pleasure to meet you.”

The animal chirps in response and all the children laugh, delighted.

“I am very sorry, my lord, could you repeat that?” He is not using the voice for difficult people. That one is mean, and it scares Jin Ling (they learned that the hard way), he is using a mock of a high-class voice. He and Wei Ying used to play “Lan Sect Disciple” when they got fed up with the rules. They’d make fun of anyone who bothered them in the day and laughed their asses off until after midnight.

He holds the rabbit closer to his face, praying that the rabbit will not bite him.

It’s worse.

The bunny puts both his paws on his cheeks and very slowly, very deliberately licks from the tip of his nose to the bridge.

After a beat of silence, there is roaring laughter.

Jiang Cheng pulls the rabbit away in shock. He really hadn’t expected the rabbit to do that! He didn’t even know rabbits licked people!

“See, Uncle?” Jin Ling smiles even wider and Jiang Cheng’s heart melts. “I told you and A-Ying would be friends!”

The world stops.

The world freezes.

There is no sound but a faint ringing in his ears.

He is barely aware that his hands have tightened around the rabbit.

The rabbit.

A-Ying?

A rabbit?

A rabbit.

“Sect Leader Jiang.”

A-Ying.

Wei Ying.

The black rabbit.

It’s Wei Ying.

“Sect Leader.”

The rabbit squirms, but he only presses stronger.

He can feel ribs.

Ribs.

Like his brother’s.

Why could he see his brother’s ribs?

Oh, he was hungry.

He came hungry into his house, and hungry he left.

Ribs are fragile. He must be careful.

Must not hurt A-Ying and his little ribs, he thinks.

Too skinny, too weak.

Too thin.

Shijie should cook them all a meal.

A meal for A-Ying, yes.

A meal for the little rabbit.

For his little ribs.

“Uncle?”

Someone tries to take A-Ying from his hands.

He panics.

Why?

Why are they taking him away?

He’s just a little rabbit.

Mother will understand.

The little rabbit is too thin and too scared.

A-Cheng scared him once, too. But it won’t happen again.

He’ll protect his brother and his brother will protect him.

There’s a smell of rot.

Where is A-Ying?

Shijie wants to see A-Ying.

Shijie can see A-Ying’s ribs.

His heart, beating wild under those thin, fragile ribs-

“Jiang WanYing!”

He snaps out of it.

Lan WangJi just yelled.

They look at each other.

“You’re hurting the rabbit.” He says, now in a normal voice. Jiang Cheng opens his hands and the rabbit doesn’t hesitate; he jumps straight out his arms and leaps into the forest at full speed. It’s a blur of black.

The rest of the warren follows quickly behind their leader.  

“A-Ying.” Jiang Cheng mutters. “He’s called A-Ying.”

“Uncle? Are you alright?”

He turns to see Jin Ling. He’s no longer smiling. He looks worried.

“I…” He trails off. He doesn’t want to speak of this in front of Lan WangJi or his children.

Perfect Lan WangJi who hated Wei Ying.

Who hated Wei Ying for trying to be friends.

Who hated his brother before he did.

He cannot, will not, spend a single second more in the Cloud Recesses.

“Stand up, A-Ling, we’re leaving.”

“But Uncle-“

“I gave you an order, Jin Ling! I am not asking!” He stands and he walks away. He knows Jin Ling will be behind him. That boy will not disobey him.

When they get back home, he will tell Jin Ling all about the Yiling Patriarch, Wei WuXian, Wei Ying.

Chapter Text

How Wei Ying has managed to evade the knowledge that Willow took a mate is insane. He just… Didn’t notice.

It’s embarrassing, really. His closest friend and second in command met a doe from the Hrair Hain Warren, liked her well enough to lie with her, got her pregnant, and gave birth; all of this Wei Ying found at the same time as meeting new-born Bluebell, with her cute little ears and pink nosey.

Wei Ying loves her.

She’s just so tiny! Her waddling legs and sweet smell, Wei Ying just can’t get enough of it. She’s pretty eloquent, and she asks questions like answers are air. She tends to stick only with those her parents trust, and so Wei Ying is happily left with the responsibility of babysitting.

As soon as she’s big enough to leave the burrow, he takes her to meet Lan Zhan. He sings praises and tells wild stories of the Shine of the Sun. Bluebell is awed. Wei Ying is pretty  sure he convinced her Hyfrith is a god of some kind.

Lan Zhan seems to adore her right back.

He picks her up with extreme care, settling her on his palm, and murmurs into the quiet forest.

“Tiny.”

Wei Ying cackles.

“She is, Hyfrith! Isn’t she cute?” He jumps around them, overjoyed and proud. She’s not even his, but he’ll fight for her like she is. Lan Zhan scratches the light grey fur in the little one and she chirps.

“Hyinlé-Rah!” She calls.

“What is it?”

“I love Hyfrith-Rah!” ‘Get in the line, kit.’ He laughs.

“We all do, Bluebell-roo!”

He studies Lan Zhan with the kit. He seems perfectly comfortable there, and it looks like it’s going to be one of those days where Lan Zhan stays all evening there. It’s perfect.

It’s all according to plan.

“Bluebell, stay here with Hyfrith-Rah, alright?” He tells her and she chirps her understanding. “I’ll be back for you in a little while, don’t wander off.” He’s got something to do.

He begins walking towards the forest; Lan Zhan looks at him and back at Bluebell. He must be so confused to play nanny, but Wei Ying knows he can handle it. In any way, spending the late evening holding a baby bunny is a much better use of time than spending it playing a song for someone who cannot respond.

As soon as he’s out of sight, he runs. He rushes past bushes and trees, getting as far away as he can from the burrows. He doesn’t want to risk anything, so he’s taking all the precautions he can.

He runs until he’s almost at the far end edge of Gusu, almost out of the territory. This should do it.

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and searches for resentful energy in the area.

He hasn’t done this since that one time, years ago, but the thought goes on and on in his brain. Can he handle resentful energy in his rabbit body? Can animals harness resentful energy? Can they produce it?

Rabbits aren’t really petty, except for the elil. But he’s sure the amount of anger towards a particularly vicious bird wouldn’t be enough to bring a rabbit back from the dead, much less control it, or make it fight.

Still, he searches until he feels the pressure in his heart and mind. He’s found something.

It’s not very big, in human standards. It wouldn’t even go past his knees. As a rabbit, they’re almost the same size, with Wei Ying being the smaller one, but it’s alright. He can fight it off, whatever it is if it gets violent.

It’s skinny as well. Not well fed. He can picture the bones barely covered by matted fur. Maybe it starved?

Maybe it’s a rabbit who died angry at Frith. Yes, that’s a good theory. He’ll raise it and see what goes from there.

He concentrates on the anger, lets it fill him up; not to the brim, because he doesn’t want to lose control, but he lets it run through his thin veins. He presses his nose to the ground and calls.

“Wake up.”

He shivers as he feels the ground underneath him move.

The starved rabbit rises easy, wanting to get out. It’s clawing its way from below the earth, and Wei Ying can feel the vibrations in his paws.

The closer it gets, the angrier it feels. It’s desperate and frustrated. Wei Ying keeps pulling it with its own anger.

“Come, come. Up, up, up.” The earth breaks from the scratches from inside and Wei Ying takes a look at what finally came up.

It is not a rabbit.

It’s a fox.

Angry and starving, it’s got open wounds on him, and his side is run through with an arrow.

It’s got its white unseeing eyes on Wei Ying.

He’s not afraid of foxes as he’s afraid of dogs. He calms himself. Whatever this fox is feeling, Wei Ying is stronger. One, because he’s alive, and two, because he is in control.

He is in control of himself, of his feelings and emotions. He will not be overrun by anger and fear, however great they might be.

He is the Yiling Patriarch, he smiles to himself. He is Wei Wuxian, unstoppable and untameable.

Fuck being a normal rabbit! He can be so much more than that!

“Bow,” he tells the fox, who’s ears shot forward in attention.

Wei Ying is the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation and his words will be obeyed.

“Bow down to me.” He repeats as he moves forward, his long body posed with elegance and strength. He holds his head high. “I am your master,” he croons. “Bow down and obey.”

This can work, he thinks.

If he manages to control an elil, every warren in the world will be safe. Elil fighting elil, Wen corpses fighting Wen-dogs, and everyone will now be safe. This is the cunning brain Frith has given him, here are El-Ahrairah’s tricks.

If this fox bows to him, history will be re-written.

A beat passes.

The fox doesn’t bow, but Wei Ying barely has time to feel disappointment, because the fox has lunged towards him all fangs and howls of hate.

It doesn’t really talk, but Wei Ying doesn’t need words to know the fox wants to kill him. All that anger has been simmering for years and years and now it has the escape of sweet rabbit flesh.

Wei Ying jumps back and stands in his forelegs, ready to hit the fox as soon as he comes forward. It does, and Wei Ying distracts the fox with his paws to be able to bite it.

And bite it he does! All over its face, its side. His neck is thoroughly scratched, his old wounds opened wider, and yet the fox won’t stop attacking. It’s vicious! There’s no stop to his advances and Wei Ying is getting tired. He’s not used to fighting seriously.

 He runs away from the fox, but he forces himself to stop as he realizes he tried running towards the burrow. He can’t put them in danger.

Then, he’ll go to Lan Zhan! Yes! HanGuang-Jun will kill the fox with a single guqin note and take Wei Ying with him to cleanse him or whatever and Wei Ying will never, ever use demonic cultivation again-

Bluebell.

He cannot go to Lan Zhan because Bluebell is there.

Lan Zhan can fight for himself, yes, but Bluebell will be scared, and there is not enough time to get her to safety. Wei Ying shivers just thinking of the little baby, trampled to death for his carelessness.

In a flash, pictures of Bluebell are replaced with pictures of A-Yuan. Pictures of Jin Ling.

He has already hurt a child, endangered another. He will never put Bluebell in danger, even if it kills him.

He runs back towards the fox, fighting every instinct he has. He will have to destroy himself to destroy the fox, but it doesn’t matter.

He goes to the fox, who even in death seems confused as to why a rabbit would be suicidal enough to jump straight into its jaws. Every nerve in Wei Ying is screaming at him to get away. 

He takes that emotion and turns it into bravery, somehow. He attacks just as he defends, biting and scratching. He’s trying to get the fox to run out of energy.

A good thing to remember while fighting corpses: resentful energy is not eternal. Sometimes, corpses run out of anger and they drop. Wei Ying is hoping the fox will be the same.

It doesn’t really stop, but it does slow down, eventually. Wei Ying is exhausted, but he knows he still needs to finish this.

He takes a deep breath before going straight to it.

It being dismembering the fox. He takes a bite and pulls. The fox is not very well preserved, so it falls down easily. It yelps in confusion, and Wei Ying keeps going.

The fox isn’t really dead, and won’t be until he’s burnt down, but Wei Ying can do the next thing.

He digs until he’s satisfied and takes the fox’s limbs and dumps them inside. He puts them in layers. First the head, then dirt, the back legs, dirt, the front legs, the torso. While he pushes the dirt back into its place he grunts and growls, at the fox and at himself.

He thinks himself unstoppable.

He is an arrogant idiot who will get himself killed. Again.

To think he tried to use corpses, like before. Did he not remember how it ended last time? His friends and family dead because of him, and chaos running rampant.

When the deed is done, he doesn’t wait to catch his breath. He runs back to Lan Zhan and Bluebell.

The sun is almost set, so he needs to get Bluebell-roo back to her parents and the burrow, where she’ll be safe from monsters like the fox, and monsters like him, who raise foxes.

He finds Lan Zhan in almost the same posture. He is meditating, and in his folded hands, Bluebell is sleeping.

Wei Ying releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“Hyfrith.” He calls and finds his voice too light. Lan Zhan doesn’t even hear him. He hops towards him and pushes his knees with his paws. “Hyfrith, please give me Bluebell. She needs to go home now.”

Lan Zhan looks down.

“A-Ying.” He greets and puts Bluebell down. Lan Zhan doesn’t seem to notice anything is amiss; Wei Ying’s black fur hides blood well, but Bluebell can smell it.

“Hyinlé-Rah?” She cries. “What happened?” She licks at him. Sweet child. “Why are you hurt? Did you fight someone?”

It’s her cries that alert Lan Zhan. He looks down on them and sees how Wei Ying’s paw left a bloody print on his robe.

“A-Ying?” He moves his hand to hold him, but Wei Ying steps back. He has priorities, and that priority is now getting Bluebell to her parents.

He grabs her by the nape and runs, all the while she calls his name worriedly. He tells her nothing. Tomorrow he’ll tell Willow what happened. Willow is his most trusted friend. Only he will know what Wei Ying has done. Wei Ying will also promise him that he will never deal with resentful energy again.

Today proved that whatever control he had over that energy as a human, he does not have it as a rabbit. And Wei Ying is stubborn, but he is not stupid. He’s learned from his past life. He will not make the same mistakes. He will never again use resentful energy while in this rabbit form.

He puts Bluebell on the entrance of the burrow and tells her to go home. She does, because she’s a well-behaved angel. The best kit. He tells her this as she goes, and she purrs happily.

When she’s gone, he lets himself fall.

Everything hurts everywhere. Between his overused muscles and bite wounds, there isn’t a part of him that came unscathed.

He hears human steps but does not raise his head.

What is, is what must be, and if Frith has decided to punish him from raising a dead elil by sending him to some lazy cultivator’s stew, Wei Ying will comply. Fuck everything.

Instead, he’s raised carefully by Lan Zhan.

He must have followed him all the way here. What a good man.

It’s a shame Wei Ying is getting his hands all bloody. He whimpers and Lan Zhan hums softly.

“I am here.” He says. “You will heal.”

As he is taken back to the Cloud Recesses, Lan Zhan is humming.

‘I know this song,’ Wei Ying thinks, before passing out.

Chapter Text

Wei Ying can see now how good he had it the last time he was under Lan Zhan’s care. That was super fun! He got pats and kisses and treats and now he’s in pain and alone and bored in an empty room.

He doesn’t even want to move, which is saying something.

He’s been sleeping, but he’s slept enough. He is good at ignoring the pain, but the bandages and ointments that were put on him by Lan Zhan’s petition are very uncomfortable (he really enjoyed the doctor’s face when she was told to please, please heal the huge rabbit); they tug at his fur in different ways, and they’re itchy and he wants nothing more than take them off, rearrange his mangled fur and hide in his burrow.

He can’t, though, first because he physically can’t move an inch, but also because it’d be rejecting Lan Zhan’s kindness, and that simply won’t do. Besides the discomfort of the situation, he really does enjoy being in the man’s care; his soft hands and sweet, monosyllabic words are pretty charming. But he’s not here, and so, Wei Ying isn’t happy.

Lan Zhan can’t take Wei Ying now. He’s hurt (because he’s an idiot who should really prioritize better) and so, he can’t be a pet today. Today he’s a wild animal who got in a fight with another wild animal and is only alive because of human care.

He just wishes he wasn’t so alone. Through his whole life, the only moments when he was alone were the bad ones, like the Murial Mounds, before the war was finished. He’s used to noise and life, even as a rabbit! The constant presence of litter mates and kin is soothing in a way that human relations aren’t.

So, it’s not just being bored, it’s literally the only thing keeping him sane; the resentful energy is still not entirely gone, and it doesn’t feel nice.

The door to the jingshi suddenly opens, and slow steps fill the quiet. A pretty face peeks the box Wei Ying has been sleeping in.

“A-Ying?” A-Yuan calls and Wei Ying could cry. His child is here, all his well now. He purrs a hello as little hands pick him up carefully. “Father said you were here and, oh!” He exclaims.

He can now see that the bandages go from side to side, head to tail in his body. The fox really did a number on him.

“So, it’s true, then…” The child says as he sits down and puts Hyinlé in his lap. “You fought another animal. I thought you got along with all the rabbits.”

“It wasn’t a rabbit, Nizenroo.” He trembles as A-Yuan’s hands get too close to his wounds, but he manages to stay still. “I fought a fox.”

“I really hope you won.” He says and Wei Ying laughs. This kid… “Father said you’re going to be staying here until you’re perfectly healed. I’m happy. It’s easier to sneak into father’s room than into the forest.”

“It’s not a forest,” Wei Ying counters. “It’s more like a clear…” Wait, sneaking. “Nizenroo, my kit, are you supposed to be in class?” He manages to look up at his child, who is still talking away, complaining about lessons.

“So boring,” he says. “I do like learning history, but grand uncle can make it so dull… I would like it if Uncle XiChen could be a teacher, but he’s always so busy. He really does tell the best stories.” He tells the rabbit. “He makes them super fun.”

“How nice, how nice, I’m proud! My little kit, being all mischievous. I bet Lan Qiren won’t even bother you about it! He likes you too much…”

Wei Ying lets himself relax in the child’s hands as A-Yuan prattles on. He pays attention to everything; not because it’s interesting (because it’s not, it’s terribly boring), but because it’s Lan Yuan’s life. He is so, so happy to just be there, in his child’s care and his child’s life.

Forget being a leader to a proud rabbit warren, to see A-Yuan again, to see Lan Zhan on the daily, these are the true gifts bestowed by the Heavens.

This is the general tone for what seems hours until Wei Ying’s interest is picked up again when Lan Yuan says:

“And I’ll soon get my own ribbon!”

“Oh?” He asks, ears twitching. This will be interesting.

“I’m really excited, but I’m also really nervous! I don’t know how I’ll keep it clean!” He whines. “And- and my hair is a mess sometimes, if father is not there to help me tie it up, what if it falls off, and I lose it, and I bring shame to my father and Uncle and Grand Uncle, and the elders and they kick me out of the sect and they send me back to wherever father picked me up!”

And wow. Wei Ying really wasn’t expecting that.

“Lan Clan forehead ribbons are very, very important, A-Ying.” Lan Yuan says seriously as he sets Wei Ying down on the floor. He is towering above him, wagging a finger, like Lan Qiren does when he wants to emphasize a point. “They mean to ‘regulate one’s self’; when you get one, you have to trea-su-re it.” He enunciates carefully. “No one but you can touch it.”

He pauses, then makes a face.

“Well, only you and your betrothed.”

“Your what?” 

“Like, like, when you love someone so much that you want to marry them, you take off your ribbon and tie it on the other’s wrist, that way everyone knows that you want to marry them! No one else should ever, ever, ever take your forehead ribbon, that’s very bad. Uncle Xichen said that if someone tries to take my forehead ribbon, I should punch them in the face, but I can’t say he told me that. I think it’s because he knows I’m kinda friends with Jin Ling from the Jiang Sect, do you remember him? Well, sometimes he grabs things without warning, so he may take it. Father says that if he takes the ribbon, it doesn’t mean I have to marry him, but I can still punch him in the face.”

Wei Ying tunes out his kit’s words after that so he can go over the new information carefully.

1. A-Yuan is getting a ribbon. His baby is so big! Almost a teenager, what a joy!
2. A-Yuan is friends with Jin Ling. This is a relief; his nephew not only has friends, but he has the bestest of friends. The best child, if Wei Ying can say so. It also means that Jiang Cheng isn’t that offended after being rejected by a rabbit with his late, villainous brother’s name. This is also a joy.
3. Ribbons are… More important than he previously thought.

This explains a lot actually.

Oh, gods, Lan Zhan’s face when he pulled on the ribbon, he must have hated him!

Well, no, not hate, he already liked him, didn’t he? He must have been… Hurt. Angry. Sad.

Oh, no, his poor Lan Zhan, Hyfrith-Rah, beloved! All those times Wei Ying teased and pushed and bothered, gods, he really needs to apologize for those.

But then, would Lan Zhan have wanted to marry him? Now, that’s a thought… His ears twitch in excitement when he thinks of Lan Zhan

Lan Zhan should really punch him in the face as A-Yuan says. He’d have it coming.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Lan Yuan left sometime between two or three for dinner. Wei Ying doubts he’ll return until the next day, but he’s fine with that. The quality time was good anyways.

Very enlightening.

Much to think about.

Maybe that’s why he didn’t even notice when Lan Zhan returned to his room. His brain was filled with hypothetical red dresses, and tied ribbons and shy smiles, and if there’s a teeny tiny fantasy of being shoved into a tree again, this time eyes wide open, that’s no one’s business’ but his own.

He barely saw Lan Zhan go into the bathing room, which explains why he was so surprised when his voice echoed quietly. 

“Oh…”

“Hyfrith?” Wei Ying can’t turn very well, wrapped up in bandages and all. It’s not that he doesn’t trust Lan Zhan, but the instinct to always be aware of things bigger than him (which is 80% of it all). “Is all well?” He knows Lan Zhan can’t really answer him, but he didn’t answer back in the day, so it really isn’t such a change.

What is a change is Lan Zhan’s body, clearly.

It seems the quiet ‘oh’ was but a comment to Lan Zhan forgetting his clothes in the room and simply deciding that it was perfectly fine for a grown, handsome, built man to go walking around stark naked.

If Wei Ying still had a face, he’d be redder than an apple. (We may have been shameless, but he was still a blushing virgin.) He does his best not to look, but Lan Zhan is just right there. His skin is terribly pale, he thinks. Whiter than the whitest snow. There are still some droplets of water on his shoulder, lazily rolling down those big, strong arms… His hair is down and unbound, giving Lan Zhan a wilder look, not entirely bad. Nimble fingers are pulling out fabric and cloth, Lan Zhan turns around to dress and…

Wei Ying almost jumps.

His back is covered in scars.

Not just one or two, but what seems just mangled skin, pink and soft looking, so innocent, like it didn’t mean terrible violence.

Lan Zhan covers his back, but it doesn’t stop Wei Ying from thinking about it.

Why does he have those marks? Who made them, and how does Wei Ying make them pay?

How dare they lay a hand on Lan Wanji, praised HanGuang-Jun? He, who is nothing but righteous? Nothing but good, and kind, and caring?

Wei Ying doesn’t realize he’s shaking until Lan Zhan strokes his fur softly.

“Poor A-Ying, in pain…” He mumbles, his voice deep enough that Wei Ying can feel it rumbling in his chest. How can Lan Zhan still care about other’s pain when he was subjected to such treatment?

He was whipped! And not with any mercy, if the direction of the scars is any indication; those were made to hurt and immobilize, maybe even to punish… Was this done here, in Gusu? No, that’s ridiculous, Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen would first be dead than allow anyone to harm their Second Jade. No, it had been someone else, and whoever they were, they would pay greatly….

Wei Ying’s thoughts became disorganized and slurred as Lan Zhan lit some sleep-inducing incense and his everything stopped hurting.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

For all of A-Yuan’s talk of the importance of the ribbon, Lan Zhan certainly took some liberties.

Wei Ying would have been the first one to be 100% sure that Lan Zhan took extra special care of it, keeping it clean and safe, and not using it but to adorn his pretty, pretty face, but boy was he wrong.

And he was wrong in the most extraordinary of events.

It wasn’t even his fault! He just wanted to sniff the damned thing, to see if it really was Lan Zhan that smelled of sandalwood or it was just the incense stuck on his clothes, but Lan Zhan had seemed to think that this was an interest on the ribbon.

This ended at least half an hour later, with Wei Ying sporting the ribbon as the world’s ugliest bow around his neck.

“Hyfrith, this isn’t proper, I now know what the ribbon means, take it off.” He squirmed. The feeling of the soft ribbon against his healing skin was sweet pain, and the soft rubs he earned every time he stayed still long enough for Lan Zhan to try another method were lovely but embarrassing. “Hyfrith, won’t you have mercy on this little, defenseless rabbit? I’m so in pain, and so tired, Hyfrith, be nice, boo hoo…” He mimics distressed noises to elicit some response, but Lan Zhan completely ignores them.

He knows he’s faking it, and Wei Ying knows that Lan Zhan knows because he said so.

“A-Ying just received pain medicine,” he said. And it was true, he was given a slice of apple with some sweet-smelling brew on top. “A-Ying is fine.”

And he made another bow.

The newest one was around one ear, and Lan Zhan kept putting it up and down, the ribbon going from left to right, one ear and then the other, and then both. Then around his paws, one after the other, then all together, then the two in the front, all for Lan Zhan’s amusement.

“Hyfrith, you’re so cruel…” He moaned, but he was pleased with being rubbed with Lan Zhan’s scent. This pleased both his rabbit and human instincts: not only was he safe from elil, but he also smelled like his beloved.

All was fine, after all.

“You know, Hyfrith,” he began, when Lan Zhan was busy making a triple knot around his fluffy tail. “I heard once a saying that says that if something happens once, it may or may not happen again, but if it happens a second time, it will certainly happen a third time. What d’ya think? I think it’s really funny, especially because I’ve been in your rooms two times now! This means I’ll be back before I die. Don’t look at me like that,” He pretended the nasty look was directed at his comment and not the ribbon for falling off. “I am no longer a younger rabbit! I am almost nine years old now! A senior citizen! You have in your care an elder, treat me with respect, Second Jade of Lan!” He laughed at the thought, even if it was true. “In any case, I want to be here as long as I can. Who knows what will happen after you take me back to the enclosure? Who knows anything about anything? No even El-ahrairah could see the future, try as he might…” He dozed off. “Hey, Hyfrith, Lan Zhan, you know what? I’m really happy I got to see you again.” He mumbled against the man’s finger, from where it was softly petting his cheek.

“Cute little rabbit.” Lan Zhan mumbled back, and Wei Ying huffed a laugh.

“That’s right, Hyfrith, just a cute, little rabbit…”   

Chapter Text

It was the very first day of winter when Hyinlé felt it.

It was a gnawing in his chest, soreness on the bottom of his paws, a certain sluggishness in his movements. It didn’t hurt, really, it just…

Slowed everything down.

If he could compare it to something, he’d say it was like a dried-up river; the water still flows, but never with enough strength.

He would actually think it felt like the last moments before having his golden core removed; as Wen Qing pulled it out of his chest and he felt his very soul detach itself, slowly, fiber by fiber.

Not pain, but still painful.

The snow didn’t even touch his skin, it got stuck on top of his fur; some instinct wouldn’t allow him to go out with the younger rabbits, so he holed himself up in the burrow.

“There are no predators here,” he’d tell himself, hoping the feeling of smallness against the vast, white snow would disappear. “In any case, Lan Zhan wouldn’t allow anything to happen to me, he cares too deeply for us rabbits.” That would only worsen his desire to go outside and fall right into Lan Zhan’s lap, but the anxiety inside wouldn’t budge.

Weeks were spent like this; until they weren’t.

Hyinlé wakes up from a nap suddenly, another instinct making him stand up in a rush.

He races (or tries to, the soreness won’t let him) far away from the burrow. He sees faces pass by, Willow’s brow fur melting into the dirt they’re in, Bluebell’s gentle laugh, Wolfberry-Rah’s gasp as he passes beside them, not stopping for a second, no hello’s, no good bye’s.

As it is. 

He goes past the forest, far into the enclosure, and stops. The feeling is still there, but he knows not where to run next. The feeling won’t tell him.

It’s easily fixed as Lan Zhan walks into Wei Ying’s peripheral vision.

“Hyfrith, Hyfrith!” He hops slowly up to him and is dutifully picked up. “Lan Zhan!”

. . .

Lan Zhan has been incredibly bored.

Brother is always busy with important sect matters, Uncle has classes to prepare, A-Yuan, his son, is already sixteen and making his way through the world. He goes on night hunts, now, with Lan Jingyi and the other disciples Lan Zhan has taught himself.

He is very proud, but then again, pride doesn’t take away the monotony of his days.

Is bored the right word? No… He’s lonely. He wishes…

No use wishing.

He’s kind of escaped into the rabbit’s enclosure, he was supposed to be writing reports and checking exams, but today is such a lovely day. The snow is no longer falling on their heads as rain and he can actually enjoy the scenery like this.

If all goes as he wants, he may even get to indulge. Slightly.

He sees A-Ying hopping towards him, black above white and struggling with the snow. It’d be quite funny if it didn’t mean A-Ying was getting old.

“Rabbits live more or less ten years,” a farmer once told him, when he asked. “But only if you take good care of ‘em”

Lan Wangji was certain he had been very good to the rabbits. He’d done his absolute best and it showed in the caring of the little bundles of fur. It still gnawed at his heart that his A-Ying was close to…

Lan Zhan scooped A-Ying from the ground and pressed him into his chest, warming the little animal, feeling the thump-thump of his little heart against his own. All was going well. He’d take A-Ying to the jingshi and work there with A-Ying on his lap. And that would be enough.

. . .

Lan Zhan could feel it in his bones when it was almost nine; it was barely a second thought.

Many things he did were second-though, recently: his fingers moved on their own to play Inquiry, his feet took him to the next class with no hurry, his hands buried themselves in A-Ying’s dark fur to pet.

They’d been at it for hours, Lan Zhan reading papers and A-Ying napping. It was good, this system. They hadn’t started very long ago, and yet Lan Zhan found it one of the best indulgences (right there with buying Emperor’s Smile he’d never drink and pressing his hands on top of Lan Yuan’s shoulders).

Lan Zhan shifted from his kneeling posture, usually enough to wake up his black rabbit, but this time, A-Ying didn’t even stir. Lan Zhan passed a single finger from his nose to his back, expecting a chirp, but still nothing happened.

Cold soaked his veins.

He pressed his hand to A-Ying’s chest and felt no heartbeat, no breath.

In the solitude of his room, he pressed the still warm rabbit to his chest.

. . .

Hyinlé, Eluelil, Wei Wuxian felt himself drift off in Hyfrith’s lap, his fingers making nonsensical figures on his ribs. The instinct to move and leave had left, little by little, washed away by Hyfrith’s hands. He was safe, he was hidden. Now was a good time to

let

go.

He breathed in.

Breathed out.

breath in

breath

out

A black rabbit, so dark it could have been made of night, was waiting for him.

They raced together away from Gusu and the Thousand Song’s Warren, they went above Yilling and beyond the Jungmeng lily ponds.

Hyinlé, Eluelil, Wei Wuxian, Wei Ying, walked with the Black Rabbit of Death into the Mo household.

And woke up with a kick to the face.

. . .

“Whose land do you think you’re living in? Whose rice are you eating? Whose money are you spending? What’s wrong with taking a few of your belongings? Everything you own should be mine, anyway!”

Why is this person yelling? Hyinlé feels the tension all over his body, his injuries hurt in a way they haven’t since Hyfrith took care of them, he can feel a headache coming and he’s incredibly thirsty. He doesn’t know where he is, and he is being bullied by a very big predator.

Predator? Nah, this is just some teenage brat. Not a big threat.

Without looking up, he growls but the sound isn’t clear; his teeth and mouth don’t work, don’t move the way they did before.

“He’s really lost it now! He’s acting like a beast!” The human reaches out to grab him and Hyinlé jumps out of the way, or he tries to. His legs feel too long and too short at the same time. He can’t move correctly.

He raises his eyes as sees people. Human people. They look angry and confused, but that’s not all he can notice. Their faces are hidden in shadows and Hyinlé should be able to see in the shadows. The colors around him are too vibrant, the blacks swallow all light and the red on his incredibly pale skin stands out like a flag.

Hyinlé blinks slowly.

Pale skin. He moves a hand to touch with fingers the wounds on his arm. He can feel those long, three-pieced fingers. He cannot taste the blood only by smelling it. His senses seem dull. He takes a look at the floor; he studies the symbols there for a moment.

For the first time in thirteen years, Hyinlé stands tall on two straightened out legs. He chuckles when he realizes he’s almost as tall as the other humans. One of the humans grabs his wrist and muscle memory, not instinct, kicks in: he starts scratching and biting.

. . .

After a very satisfying fight, Hyinlé, Wei Wuxian, walks out of the house and studies his surroundings. He smiles at the sky, something he couldn’t really do before.

He’s figured out the important parts, the young man who has given a body is called Mo XuanYu, and as the first of the knife wounds disappear, he needs to humiliate the Mo family for the body to be his.

This is child’s play for the always shameless Wei Wuxian.

As he walks into the family house, he catches sight of his own heavily painted face in the water of a barrel. Now, that won’t do at all. He licks his palm and rubs his face. He stops mid-act.

That’s… A rabbit movement.

But is he a rabbit? No.

Yes.

No?

‘I am Hyinlé, Eluelil.’ He tells himself. ‘I am Wei Wuxian, Wei Ying, Yilling Laozu.’

‘I am Mo XuanYu.’

‘I am Wei Wuxian in Hyinlé in Mo XuanYu.’

Yes. No. Yes. No.

He feels his legs tremble with unused energy, he wants to jump to relieve it, but humans do not jump. What is he to do now?

He’s been human before; how hard can it be to be human again? He’s fine. All of this will be solved, and he’ll be able to return to his existential crisis in no time.

Things get difficult when he enters the house and starts talking backwards.

He needs to fix that too.

. . .

Even with the technical difficulties, he still managed to do what he needed to do, and now he’s got a new body with a new golden core, and the promise of a fruitful life before him.

How… Terrible. No. How good? Great? Is this a blessing or a curse?

He sits down in the forest that is Dafan mountain. All fight has left his body now, but he’s still wary; it is so difficult to deal with unsafe-ness now! He can’t hear a thing on the area, he can’t feel the earth under his feet, his heart is beating too slowly, and he doesn’t have anyone watching his back to warn him before getting picked by a falcon.

He tries to tell himself he’s not going to get picked up by a falcon, and his mind supplies that it could be a fox instead.

Or a dog. (That last one does make him shiver.)

Sounds of a fight startle him; they must be really close if he can hear them. He tries to run away and is quickly cut off by a group of cultivators.

“What are you doing here?” One of them asks. Wei Wuxian opens his mouth, but no brilliant excuse comes out. He’s spent so long not lying, not needing to, that he doesn’t even have a quick remark.

“I’m… lost?”

“Get down!” Someone yells, and Wei Ying is faster than anybody else; his chest is on the ground before the others finish processing the words. “Dammit, now we’ve really done it!”

“We need help!”

“Someone call Sect Leader!”

“Hanguang Jun is here!” Wei Ying runs, this time towards the noise.  He has no plan but if Hyfrith is here, all will be well.

“Damn, that kid is fast! Did you see those reflexes?” One of the cultivators says, watching him move fluidly among the trees and fallen trunks.

When Wei Ying arrives at the scene the fight has just finished. The winners are catching their breath, congratulating themselves on a good job, and thanking…

They’re thanking Lan Zhan. Lan Zhan is here. Wei Ying is lost in the feelings.

His mouth and legs move on their own as he races towards the man.

He barrels into the man, but Lan Zhan barely moves. He just stays incredibly tense as he’s hugged by a stranger. Wei Ying doesn’t even notice, he’s too busy smelling the scent of Lan Zhan’s clothes and reveling in the warmth.

“Lan Zhan, sunshine,” he whines into the clothes.

“Who are you?” Wei Ying is a little sad that he can no longer detect all the subtle details in his voice, but he’s memorized them well enough. Ten years next to someone will do that.

He raises his face, probably still painted and dirty of saliva a sweat, and smiles.

“I’m Wei Ying.” The words still feel foreign inside his mouth, but he’s catching up. “I’m back.”

Lan Zhan’s eyes widen, his breath catches in his throat. Wei Ying is close enough that he doesn’t need rabbit ears to notice.

“Lan Zhan, let’s go back to Gusu.”