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Genji sat at the table in Dr. Zieg- Angela’s lab. His robotic arm placed on the cold metal top of a metal table that had different lab reports, files, and many other things neatly stacked together.
He was getting a work up after a mission with BlackWatch. Normally, he was fine.. but something strange happened, something that didn’t happen before. He had hesitated when taking down a group of enemy Talon Soldiers. That never.. happened..
Moira and Reyes were obviously concerned with this.. sort of glitch in his mind. OverWatch had promised that he would be fully worked up, and ready to go. No setbacks, not glitches in his program, no problems.
But.. Genji felt this.. strange feeling. Or well a strange hallucination. There was a moment in that mission, that his right arm seemed.. normal. It looked normal, for a split second. When he blinked, it looked like it’s old cybernetic self. That small hint of hesitation prompted a Talon soldier to get a good hit on the cybernetic ninja
His eyes stayed on the arm that was laid out on the table. His fingers seemed to be.. twitching.. no, they were shaking.
His heart was beating at an elevated rate, unusual for him. Now his entire hand began to shake as this wave of pain rolled through his cybernetic arm, mixed with a warm, dulling feeling.
Genji ducked his head down, his eyes falling to the plain grey tile looking floor. A good group of hair curling down into his line of sight, damp with the sweat The was starting to form.
He closed his eyes, with his shoulders visibly tensing up as the sound of Angela scrummaging in the back for an item she needed in order to check Genji’s vitals (for his cybernetic side)
His hand began to shake more violently, his knuckles beginning to tap against the metal table causing a small Dinking sound. It wasn’t loud enough for mercy to hear, but it was faint.
Another wave of pain rolled over his arm, his nerves firing over and over and over again as Genji’s eyes shot towards his cybernetic arm.
Genji had been warned (when he first began to recover from his change) by Angela that there was a chance for these things called.. Phantom Pains. Where he would feel stuff in a limb that wasn’t there anymore.
And Boy oh Boy was he feeling it; Badly.
His normal hand reached back to the small blade that was located near his lower back, his fingers wrapping around the handle of it.
As he began to pull the blade out, pain shot through his arm prompting his teeth to grit under his face plate, the pain greater than before and in his mind it seemed it wouldn’t stop.
He had been told once that he should try something that could cause pain to a normal limb, and when he would realize that it didn’t affect his arm, his mind would know that it wasn’t there anymore.
He pulled the blade from its holder, and raised his over his head. Tears beginning to form in the corners of his eyes.
He didn’t hesitate this time, with one swift swing, he brought the blade down. Watching as it easily sliced through his metal forearm, cutting straight through the metal table with a loud Clunk.
His grip on the blade grew tighter as he pulled the blade, slicing wires, cutting through metal disks, causing a small spark to fly.
A Tear fell down his cheek, stopping at the top of his mask, as he brought the blade down again (harder this time). His fingers spasmed in response.
He thought he would feel pain, he thought he would be seeing blood pour out of his arm. He thought he would’ve cut an artery or something.. his mind made him believe that another part of him was still human.. when it reality it wasn’t true.
The blade became lodged in the table, Genji letting out a yell of frustration as he tried to pull it out. Another tear fell down his cheek, then another, and another. What followed were tears after tears after tears. Genji was beginning to mentally break down, all of this anger, frustration was finally tearing itself out of his mind
“Genji!” Angela’s voice shouted in pure shock behind him.
His head turned to face her, his eyes full of pure pain locking with her blue ones.
She dropped the items in her hands, and ran towards the table not caring if those things really did break. It wasn’t her number one priority at the moment
“It’s not..” Genji began, his voice sounding broken, abused even
“Genji..” she repeated as both of her hands wrapped around the blade. She let out a large huff as she slowly pulled the blade from his arm, with wires wrapped around it “What..”
“It’s not there..” He muttered under his breath, his voice cracking as he attempted to speak “It’s not..”
The weight of his body seemed to slam forward, his knees slamming against the ground with a large Thud that echoed throughout the lab.
Angela dropped to her knees as well, placing her hands on either sides of his face plate that covered the sides of his cheeks. She pressed the palms of her hands lightly against the plate, before detaching it, and tossing it to the side.
“Genj-“
“It’s gone..” He said again, his broken eyes stared at the floor.
Angel maneuvered her hands to make Genji meet her eyes. Mentally freaking out, but she was afraid if Genji saw what she was feeling, that it was going to make the situation worse
“Genji.. look at me.” Angela spoke, her thumb cupping the underside of his chin, her other fingers cupping his right cheek feeling the tears that stained it “What’s gone?”
“It’s not real.. it’s gone..” Genji spoke again, his right hand twitching on its own as it laid on the ground next to his right leg. Different wires poked out of the self inflicted wound, cut, mangled, tangled, it was all over the place.
Angela blinked back tears of her own. Seeing the man she helped save breaking down like this.. after he’s shown little to no emotion since his operation.. it was truly heartbreaking in a sense.
“It doesn’t hurt.. it’s..” Genji began again, as he stared at Angela “It’s not real..” Genji repeated as a stream of tears began to flow down onto Angela’s right hand “Why..”
“We can fix this Ge-“
“It’s not the same..” Genji interjected as he pushed his head forward, pressing his head into the crook of Angela’s neck, prompting Angela’s right hand to fall from his cheek, and onto his shoulder.
Angela flinched slightly, surprised by the action. But, she couldn’t just do nothing. She’s cared for Genji since the accident, she can’t just sit there.. she needed to comfort him in his time of need
“Please...” Genji pleaded softly “Please...” He pleaded again as his regular right hand wrapped around her back, his fingers grabbing onto the other side of her waist, gripping it tightly
“I’m..” Angela paused for a moment “I’m right here Genji..” She spoke softly into his ear as her left hand wrapped around his back, her fingers pressing against the cold metal of his body. Her right hand went higher, her arm pressing against his cold shoulder, as her hand was placed on the slightly top and back of his head, her fingers interlacing themselves with locks of his hair
“It’s okay Genji.” She spoke with reassuringly “I’m right here.. I’m right here..” She said with a genuine tone of caring “It’ll be alright.”