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They never intend to stay long at the studios. Most nights they aim to stay only until 12 A.M but end up walking back to the dorms at 3 A.M. Chan and Changbin would usually push Jisung out by 1 A.M., citing that the younger was still a minor and couldn't work such late hours, but with the new year came Jisung's status of adulthood and no longer could they use such an excuse. This time Changbin had left earlier than Jisung and Chan, claiming that the sore pain in his back was inhibiting his work flow. The two members of 3RACHA understood, sending him off for an earlier rest. It was around 2:17 A.M. that Chan beckoned for him and Jisung to leave. Usually, Chan was never the one to insist, as he was always determined to work until he drops, but he knows that tomorrow they have an early commuting to the salon for a variety show filming and the makeup stylists can only cover so much of their dark circles.
Jisung shook his head, too focused on finishing the last minute touches to this track. He's working on another personal song, "a response to ‘19’", written and produced with his entire heart and soul poured into every lyric and note. But Chan insisted once again, pulling Jisung's body from the swiveling black chair. Chan knows that Jisung wants to go home, even if he won't admit to it. They ended up leaving at 2:26 A.M. So early in the morning, there was no one on the roads or walking along the sidewalks. In a way, it reminded Chan of their trainee days, when it was just him and Jisung left. They wouldn't be up so late, but together they'd leave the practice studios and opt for a snack from the 24-hour convenience store. A smile formed on Chan's face, and he took hold of Jisung's little wrist. "Let's get some ice cream."
"I thought you wanted to go to the dorms," Jisung tiredly giggled. "Why get ice cream now? We'll be up even longer."
Chan shrugged, reasoning that it's for "the sake of old times". When he palmed the back of his pants for his wallet, he noticed he'd not only forgotten his wallet but also his phone at the studio. "Uhhh… I'll pay you back?" Jisung jokingly punched Chan's bicep, accepting anyways. Chan always paid back what he owed, so Jisung never worried. It was just ice cream anyways, so it wouldn't do much damage to his cards. "Sungie, can you check what time it is? I forgot my phone, too."
"Sorry, manager-hyung's still got my phone from today's filming."
They shrug it off, shuffling through down the sidewalks until they reached the convenience store. Like a child in a candy store, Jisung flocked to the freezer at the front, staring down at all the possible frozen treats he could buy. Chan found it endearing, happy that his little suggestion could brighten up Jisung so much. Excitedly, the younger picked out a chocolate, caramel, and vanilla cornetto, waving it in Chan's face. Chan, on the other hand, chose a simple melon bar, knowing that Jisung would be too tired to finish his cone and likely nag for Chan to eat the rest. Just as he anticipated, Jisung did just that.
He shoved the half eaten cone into Chan's hands, pouting for Chan to "Please, please, please finish it" or else "it'll be a waste". With a roll of his eyes, Chan took the cornetto. He licked off a chunk of the sweet cream, wiping the remnants from his lips with the back of his hand. Jisung was far more energetic than he was before, despite his little sugar intake. If anything, Chan should be the one bouncing off walls. He skipped in front of Chan, occasionally turning backwards to look at the older while continuing to skip. The leader would laugh whenever Jisung stumbled over his own feet, momentarily stopping to catch himself from falling backwards. By the time Chan finished the leftovers of Jisung's ice cream, they were only five city blocks away from the dorm.
All the buildings along the upcoming blocks were closed this early into the morning. The only lights visible were the overhead street lamps that illuminated the sidewalks. As they came to a crosswalk of a long street, Chan couldn't help but try to entertain himself and Jisung. With a smug grin, he challenged Jisung with a race to the dorms. They'd done this before, whether it be with their whole group or just 3RACHA returning back to their little apartment. Jisung was always one of the last to get there, and between only Chan and Changbin he was the last. It was fun to tease Jisung.
Without even a moment to ponder, Jisung agrees and immediately began sprinting, completely disregarding Chan's accusations of cheating. He can tell that Jisung was determined to get home first, dashing forward with bursts of energy without so much as looking back to check if Chan was right on his tail. The crosswalk seemed to go forever. Chan yelled at Jisung to wait, his eyes crinkled as he smiled, hoping Jisung would stop and he could catch him off guard to sprint ahead. With a glimmer in his eyes and a gummy smile, Jisung did stop. And neither of them saw the truck speeding right at Jisung. The light was green, after all.
The smile was ripped from Chan's face as he watched the truck ram into Jisung. He turned just in time for the bumper to strike his chest. The younger's body practically crumbled on impact. His body was like a rag doll's, thrown across the intersection without mercy. The truck didn't have its lights on. It was driving so high above the speed limit. It didn't stop after the collision. No sound came from Chan's mouth as he watched the scene unfold. He could only stare at the spot Jisung once was, eyes wide and mouth agape in horror. There's a ringing in his ears, and the traffic light shifts to red. He scrambles down the intersection, tripping again and again as he tries to reach for Jisung.
There's a terrible skid mark of blood that shows where Jisung collided with the ground and scraped himself to a stop. His little body is twisted and crumpled, eyes unfocused and peering off to the side. When Chan falls to his knees, he's too afraid. His hands shake, and for once, he doesn't know what to do. Just earlier, they were having fun. Jisung was giddy and smiling. They were living out the past with late night treats and impromptu races. Jisung's chest is barely rising, and Chan can see his face subtly wince whenever he tries to intake a breath. In fact, Jisung's chest looks so so small. Like a flattened rubber ball, stepped on with the air slowly leaking out and deflating. In a panic, Chan reaches to his back pocket, wanting to call someone, to plead for them to please help. But Chan forgot his phone. Jisung doesn't have his either. They're only five blocks from the dorm.
He hates to watch Jisung quietly struggle. Chan hears his raspy and ragged breath, can see the rise of his chest stutter. There's blood pooling from under Jisung's head, and Chan doesn't know what to do. He reaches out to hold Jisung, to cradle his head, but the younger hiccups in pain. Chan sees the tears flow from Jisung's eyes as he experiences every wave of pain. He's settled on holding Jisung's hand now, squeezing it whenever Jisung struggles. Jisung always held their hands to comfort them in hard times. He did all that he could to show them that he was there to help. But Chan feels like he's doing the bare minimum. Shock blurs the thoughts in his head, and he can only kneel at Jisung's side and watch his friend slowly wither away.
Like a broken squeaky toy, Jisung's been reduced to quiet wheezes. His chest barely inflates, and the tears have stopped. Chan is squeezing the younger's hand, urging him to keep pushing. He can do it. If he just tries some more, then maybe Chan can get help. Chan would have more time to think of what to do. But soon, there's nothing. Jisung's chest remains unmoving and concave. His eyes, though still unfocused, are now looking in Chan's general direction, but no more is there a glimmer. At the worst moment, Chan's voice returns, and he sobs. He bites his bottom lip, tears finally escaping to run down his cheeks. Chan leans down, his hand snaking under Jisung's neck, and he tries to hold him like that. Just like he did after they performed “Victory Song”, he blankets himself over Jisung, holding himself up because this time he really does worry of crushing the younger. He has already been struck so small. Chan didn't want Jisung to be reduced to nothing. But so badly did Chan want to hold him, to have protected him. He sits up and cradles Jisung like he previously tried. A part of him hopes that Jisung would wince like he did before because then maybe, maybe there's some hope that he'd live. But Jisung's twisted body is limp in Chan's arms. He rocks the younger back and forth, not caring for the snot and tears that cover his face.
That's when he screams. Chan yells at the top of his lungs for help, for someone to save him, to save Jisung. He yells for minutes but is met with an uncomfortable silence. He wipes at his face with the back of his hand, chest heaving and shoulders rising and shaking. Chan tucks one of his arms under the bend of Jisung's knees, trying to ignore how one of his legs is turned in the wrong direction. His other arm moves down to cradle just below Jisung's pit, and Chan lifts himself onto his feet. Jisung’s neck lolls back, and Chan hastily tucks Jisung closer to his chest, relieved when Jisung’s head reclines against him. Chan finds it so much more difficult to hold the younger, even though he’s always been the lightest in Stray Kids. His lifeless body feels heavier now, like Jisung could collapse to the ground the second Chan so much as moves his hands. The leader sucks in a breath as he tries his best to hold Jisung up with one of his knees and an arm, his other hand gathering Jisung’s arms to fold over the rapper’s chest. He holds him like a sleeping child, trying to convince himself that that’s exactly what Jisung was now. He’s sleeping, too tired to continue walking to the dorms. Chan bites his lip again and tears his gaze away from Jisung’s paling face. He looks ahead. Only five blocks away, and he can take Jisung home.