Work Text:
0 hours
They were spinning. At speed, uncontrollably, with no sense of direction; not that direction was a thing that existed out here. Keith’s jetpack had given out when the energy blast first hit, smashed to smithereens when he collided with one of the lions as they were all sent tumbling out of control. So he couldn’t stop them, couldn’t slow them down as they plunged into the void. It was just the hand clinging to his that could.
That hand belonged to Allura. He couldn’t see her, couldn’t see anything at the speed they were moving, just a dark blur that put a sickening sensation in his stomach. But he could hear her breathing, and he could recognise all the paladins by little cues like that by now. That’s what happened when you lived in isolation with only a handful of people for so very long; Keith knew their footsteps, and their laughter, and unfortunately knew their crying too. He knew how long each one took in the shower, and he knew which spots they preferred at dinner. He knew the kind of shove they gave when they pushed him out’ve harms way in a battle, and he knew types of hugs each one gave. Keith knew a lot of things about the paladins by now; so he knew Allura’s breathing, and he knew she was scared.
All the other comms were dead, because she was the only person Keith could hear. Unless the others had ceased to breathe, she was the only one whose comm was still connected to his own. Was she speaking? There was sound entering his ears but it wasn’t making sense, they were spinning too fast. His senses were blurring and a heavy darkness was inching over the corners of his consciousness. Distantly, Keith knew he was close to passing out, but it made him sluggish, unable to move against the forces throwing them through space in an endless spin that without gravity and without some resistance could not be stopped.
It sounded like his name being screamed over the comms, but Keith couldn’t tell, just knew it was Allura out’ve some instinct because usually when Allura was yelling something it meant things were going very, very wrong. That meant he needed to act, to listen, do something but… it was too much. He felt heavy, despite the fact he should’ve been weightless out here, the spinning had him anchored to his own self, decaying into a spiral that was going to end in darkness.
“Keith!”
Sharp, commandeering almost.
“Keith, focus!”
He needed to, he really needed to, because Allura sounded scared. Her scared was different to most people’s scared, because she didn’t cower, just got to fixing the problem.
“Keep your eyes open, that’s it, focus.”
Were they slowing down? Keith didn’t know; it still felt like parts of his brain were trying to force their way through his skull, like all his bones had turned to a vicious, sloshy liquid that didn’t want to behave or conform.
“Keith? Can you hear me? Is your comm working?”
Keith was beginning to realise that maybe he couldn’t see because he had his eyes closed. Opening them was a mission of its own, and when he did it was hard to tell whether the world was still moving. Allura was staring back at him, just a foot or so away and holding tight to his forearms. He could wiggle his fingers now, could shift his head slightly without falling prey to complete nausea.
“Can you hear me?” Allura repeated.
Before he could respond, the jetpack on her suit she’d been using to slow their spin gave a harsh, inaudible splutter, one more burst of blue energy shooting out before it died as Keith’s had. Allura cursed softly when, upon testing it, the jetpack remained dormant. She’d slowed them down though, saved them from the endless cycle of spinning they’d been stuck in. Now they were left turning very, very slowly, clinging to each other in the dark void of space with nothing around for miles and miles and- you know what? Keith didn’t actually want to think about distances out here.
“I can hear you,” he croaked out, voice a little rough from screaming when…
The energy burst. The weird, storm-like entity that had encased them as they’d been drifting through space. The energy burst that had sapped all the lion’s energy and the shock that left their unarmoured teammates frozen in the cockpit. It was coming back to him now; the lions had been drifting away from each other, they were going to tether them back before they worked out a way to recharge them. That’s when the energy had struck again, when all five paladins were outside their lions, free to be scattered into space. Keith remembered it now, Allura grabbing Pidge, Lance grabbing Hunk. Then Lance had grabbed onto his hand, and for a second Keith thought everything was going to be alright, because Voltron had each other, and as long as they had that they’d be okay. That’s when between one second and the next, Lance’s hand became another burst of energy and Keith was hurtling away from him, and the others, barely managing to cling to Allura as they spun faster and faster and faster-
“I can’t reach any of the others,” Allura said.
She sounded abnormally loud out here, where there was no other noise, and no other paladins to disrupt the silent channel.
“Me neither. Do you know where we are?”
Allura shook her head.
“And the others?”
“I don’t know. I had Pidge for a second there- I… I don’t know what happened. That energy blast, it pulled her away.”
“I know, I had Lance. But he had Hunk, so maybe the others stayed together too and… and are somewhere… nearby,” Keith finished with a gulp, eyeing all the empty space around them.
“Right,” Allura breathed. “Nearby.”
She looked shaken, and Keith had no doubt he did too. This was… not ideal. Couldn’t anything ever go smoothly for them? They weren’t even trying to get in anyone’s way, for once, just wanted to get back to Earth, and now this.
“Is there anything we can do?”
Keith was panicking. He wasn’t going to let it show, he was going to remain calm, because he was meant to be leading them now. But he was panicking.
“No,” Allura replied.
There was only the slightest tremor to her voice, like she was also doing well at hiding things. Her eyes left his as she twisted to look around them. It was awfully dark out here, like they were a stone that had skipped far out into the lake only to plunge into the icy waters and sink and… just keep sinking. Forever.
“We’ve got no supplies,” Allura said calmly. “Communication’s down. No way of moving either since the jetpacks are broken.”
“Right,” said Keith. “Could we try contact the lions?”
“It wouldn’t be of any use,” Allura said.
She looked down sadly, or at least, their equivalent of down.
“Alright, then let’s sit tight. How much oxygen do you have?”
“Around thirteen hours, you?”
Keith swallowed anxiously, eyeing his gauge. It read nine.
“About twelve,” he lied.
“It’s no use wasting air trying to get anywhere. The others will find us, I’m sure of it.” Allura smiled tightly, a false decoy, but neither mentioned it.
“You’re right. They always figure something out.”
A short nod, the squeeze of an arm. This felt awkward, just drifting, and spinning. Very slowly, but they were still spinning, like they were a teeny tiny planet in orbit. How sweet, thought Keith, and tried desperately not to drive himself mad by counting the passing of time as the number of times they went round and around and around.
2 hours
“Pidge? Hello, Pidge? Hunk? Coran, are you there? Can anyone hear me? Shiro?”
It was impossible to tell how much time had passed out here, all Keith had to go on was his dwindling oxygen. It hadn’t taken long for he and Allura to get fed up with waiting, and now she was huddled over a panel on Keith’s armour, trying to put together a make-shift communication device. Keith could admit he wasn’t the one for figuring this stuff out, didn’t really know what she was doing. Allura had connected a little wire running out’ve the wrist of his suit to one of her own, which was meant to give them an energy boost needed to send a distress signal or… something. It wasn’t working out, in any case.
Allura leant back with a huff, frowning at her unsuccessful experiment.
“If only Hunk were here,” she muttered. “Someone who could actually fix this.”
“We’re the worst equipped for this job,” Keith agreed.
“Pidge could probably wire something up in no time.”
“I don’t know if Lance would know how to build a communicator,” Keith shrugged, “but he’d figure something else out. Or at least cheer us up.”
Allura scoffed.
“I suppose he would. They all would. Why’d it have to be us?”
Keith felt a pinch of shame, of regret; Allura might not be so doomed if she had one of their more technically capable companions to help her out.
“I think it’s more why me,” he said. “Don’t put yourself down, Allura, you’ve fixed things like this before. We… I’m sorry I can’t be of more help.”
She waved him off. “No need for apologies. It’s not as if anyone knew this was going to happen.”
“Still, it feels bad to be unprepared.”
Allura hummed her agreement.
“Should we keep trying?”
“May as well.”
With a sigh, she reached for their make-shift comm, steeling herself a second before speaking.
“This is Allura, is anyone there? I’ve got Keith, it’s Allura and Keith, and we’re out here alone and we’re lost,” she said, pausing on that word as if she was only considering it for the first time. “We’re completely lost.”
5 hours
Not that Keith hadn’t already considered it a hundred times, but space was really big. Absurdly big, too much of it for his mind to comprehend. The thought didn’t usually bother him so much, but when it came to being lost, separated from the others, with no rescue in sight, it was beginning to scare him. If they’d been survivors crashed on a mountain, at least a search party stood a chance of finding them. But in space, it was them against the infinite. Their team, if alive, could pick any direction imaginable to search for them. A hundred light years away, they could pick a direction a hairs width off, and their paths would never cross; they’d continue triangulating further and further away from each other.
“You’ve been quiet for a while,” Allura said, her voice cutting into his thoughts. “What’re you thinking about?”
They’d linked arms, leaning back-to-back whilst still spinning infuriatingly slowly.
“Nothing,” Keith lied.
“You said it yourself, contemplating all this space isn’t good for your mind. Focus on something else.”
Allura saw straight through that one then. Keith swallowed, scared to admit how hopeless he was beginning to feel staring out at the black nothingness before them.
“Do you think the others will find us?” He asked, surprised to find he couldn’t muster more than a whisper.
“Yes,” Allura answered immediately.
“What do you really think?”
Keith felt her twist behind him, and though he couldn’t see her face, he was sure she was frowning.
“I believe in the competence of our team,” she answered stiffly. “And… and of our friends.”
“What if they’re lost too?”
“What if?” Allura asked, a little snappish.
She was obviously scared too, and Keith wasn’t helping either of them by speculating worst-case scenarios.
“I’m sorry,” he said instead.
Then, ducking his head in shame, “I’m scared.”
There was a long moments pause.
“Keith, we’d have bigger problems if you weren’t scared.”
That got a chuckle out’ve him, which was worth it for a seconds relief, even if the air in his helmet was starting to taste overly processed and stale.
“It’s just that when you’re scared, no one ever knows. You always hide it, and I guess that’s what leaders should do.”
Now it was Allura who laughed. “I’m so scared. I’m terrified, Keith. My foot’s been shaking for an hour now but you can’t see it because of my suit. And I can taste juniberries.”
“You can taste juniberries? What’s that got to do with being scared?”
“You don’t taste them when you’re scared?”
“Uh, no? Should… should I?”
“Hm. Must be an Altean thing.”
They both fell silent with a little scoff then a sigh, spinning in absolute isolation with only specks of distant stars to give them any sense of reality. He never thought it’d come to this, but Keith missed the noise. Of his teammates, just their… chatter, and stuff. Their teasing. The sounds they’d unconsciously make over the comms when they were thinking, small hums or exclamations or chuckles. Lance would make these sound effects for whatever he was doing, which Keith always called stupid, but now was beginning to miss deeply. Pidge was like a broken record with how she’d talk to herself, rewire this and dial in that. Hunk liked to sing to himself, hum lowly under his breath, especially when he was caught up with work. And Shiro, though he wouldn’t admit it, was like an old man, because he always had that insufferable grumble. No one needed to clear their throat that many times an hour, nor did anyone under the age of seventy huff to themselves when they were reading over reports and came across something they found scandalous.
“I sort of miss the others,” Allura said, perfectly voicing what Keith was thinking.
“Me too. It’d be nice to at least hear them.”
“They’d probably all be arguing by now.”
Keith smiled to himself. “Probably.”
No offence intended towards himself or Allura, but they kind of sucked at keeping up the mood. Someone else, anyone else, could surely put in a better topic of conversation, or something to do.
“Hey, wanna play eye-spy?”
Allura snorted. “What could we possibly spy out here? You sound like Lance.”
“Uh, well I was going to start with v, and it was going to be the void. And yeah, I guess he’s starting to rub off on me.”
“Gaining a little of Lance’s sense of humour isn’t the worst thing that could happen to you. In fact, I think it might help.”
“Hey,” Keith protested, though he was beginning to smile. “I was funny before Lance came along.”
“Oh, I can imagine it. You exude comedy.”
“I can’t believe I’m being teased by someone who I didn’t think knew what eye-spy was.”
“Hunk taught me. We have an Earth game a week kind of deal.”
“Of course you do.”
Despite the hopelessness of the situation, Keith found he had a smile of his face now.
“Hey, remember that time we got ejected into space while trying to abandon Voltron cause we both thought Zarkon was tracking us?”
“You mean when you pushed the wrong button and self-destructed our space craft? Yes I remember.”
Keith shook his head as Allura’s teasing tone. “Yeah, that. That was so much better than this.”
“We did have jetpacks.”
“And Red.”
“Though the conversation was at least a hundred times more awkward,” said Allura.
“I guess I was pretty inept back then,” Keith said with a sigh. “At being friendly, and… liking you guys.”
“You didn’t like us?”
“I don’t think I liked anyone.”
“I thought you were friends with Lance at least.”
Keith thought on that, aware of Allura waiting just behind his back.
“I guess. I… still, I was pretty hostile. Above it all, and I’m sorry, for being like that. To you.”
Allura hesitated, and Keith felt a little uncomfortable in the silence.
“Thank you,” she said. “But mostly I’m just glad you’ve settled. Voltron, our friends, they’re rather special, aren’t they?”
“They are,” Keith answered honestly.
His throat felt tight now, but Keith forbid himself from doing something stupid, like crying. That would waste oxygen, and as it was he only had four or so hours left. So he squeezed his arms just a little tighter, so he knew Allura was there and she knew he was too, and let them spin. It was all slow going and silent out here, and all so vast. Keith watched the same star appear in his vision again and again and again, as they kept spinning into an empty horizon.
8 hours
Keith’s vision was beginning to go a little blotchy at times, like water kept falling into his eyes and he had to blink it out. He was trying hard not to think about it. Actually, he didn’t have to try too hard; it was easier than he’d expected to think of nothing when you were running low on air. That infuriating red triangle kept jumping up on his visor, and he was suddenly very glad Allura and he weren’t facing each other. She should still have a good five hours left, a fact Keith was very happy about.
He considered what he’d do, if his last hour alive was being spent anywhere else but this dark, empty, and immensely boring void. He’d love to be back in the desert, just briefly, to take a ride on his speeder and maybe race Shiro to the edge of the canyon there. He’d like to see his mom again, just to tell her he loved her. Then he’d like to verse Pidge at that cards game she was always begging him to play. Why hadn’t he played that before? That was so dumb of him, surely he had ten minutes, just a little time to spare to make her day. Keith’s eyes were filling with tears but he wasn’t going to give in to the satisfaction of them. No, nope, no no no, this was about thinking happy things. What would he be doing, with one hour left? He’d say something to Lance for sure; I don’t actually hate you, I think you’re really cool most of the time, I did take your leftovers that one time but I also felt bad so that’s why there was a plate of food outside your door that you accidentally stood in. Keith smiled to himself; oh the shock on Lance’s face would be worth it all. There couldn’t be too much left of this hour, but of course he’d go to Hunk. He’d always had those pictures of his family that he didn’t show anyone, unless asked. But if you did ask, he’d haul out his phone, and start talking and talking about them late into the night.
Wouldn’t it be nice, to spend his last hour with them all? Like those movie nights they held in the common room, which Keith hated to think had once been a waste of his time. That would be nice, he could feel warm, and surround himself in their noise. He didn’t fancy dying where it was cold and dark in space; surrounded by his team, by his family, that was better. Lance would be next to him, Shiro would be talking, Coran would be scouring their movie collection.
“How’re you holding up?” Said Allura.
Great, he was great. He was so glad she’d brought the mice along, because they always loved to be surrounded by the others too. It was so warm in here, like he was tucked beneath a blanket. Lance made a joke, and Keith wanted to laugh, but his throat felt painfully dry, so he settled just for smiling.
“Keith, am I coming through alright?”
That was a weird thing for Allura to say, but Keith didn’t think too much on it. Pidge was trying to braid her hair, and she should really ask for help because Allura’s head was starting to look like more of a battlefield, but-
“Keith,” Allura snapped. “Can you hear me?”
Of course he could, she was sitting right there. Next to Hunk, and Shiro, and what was Lance saying? It was hard to hear, like he was submerged beneath the water. But warm water, soothing water-
“Keith!”
He was shaken, hard.
“Keith, open your eyes!”
Were his eyes… closed? It was dark. Seconds ago he was sure he’d been in the common room, but now it was dark and he was trying, he was trying-
He groaned, but it was only a weak rasp really. His head was pounding and there was red flashing up in his vision over and over again. Oxygen level low. And then there was Allura, not in the common room but out in space, staring at him with anger and shock and terror in her eyes.
“Sorry,” Keith slurred, but it hurt, oh god it hurt so much to speak.
Allura said nothing, but she was acting fast. She’d opened a panel in her suit, was busy fumbling with the latch there, reaching for Keith’s suit-
“I’m transferring you oxygen, hold tight.”
And…. no. No she was not. Keith flung himself back, kicking off against Allura’s knee to send them flying in opposite directions. She yelled, grabbing for him and gripping a foot tightly seconds before they lost contact.
“Have you lost your mind!” She yelled. “Don’t separate! Don’t separate!”
Keith’s head was reeling, and yeah, that had been dumb. If they got split up, they’d have no way of getting back together. Still, he wasn’t letting Allura transfer him oxygen from her own limited supply.
“No,” he said evenly, as she reeled him back in. “Don’t transfer.”
“Don’t be stupid,” she hissed. “You nearly passed out. Keith, you’re critically low.”
“I know.”
“You know?”
He flinched at the sound of her voice. He felt so ill, was he meant to feel this ill?
“Sorry ‘Lura,” he slurred.
“Keith, give me your arm.”
He shook his head.
“Now’s not the time to be stubborn, listen and give me your arm.”
Keith swallowed around the pain in his throat and chest, forcing himself to be composed.
“I’m not doing that,” he said. “You need to conserve your oxygen.”
“And you are nearly out,” Allura said, all tension and steady glares.
“It’s okay,” said Keith. “The others, they’ve still got a chance at finding you-“
“And you! Keith, we are in this together! Let me give you oxygen.”
“No. You’ve got what, three, four hours left? What happens if you give me an hour, and it’s that extra hour they take to find you?”
“We’re not playing a game of ifs,” Allura said sternly. “I’m not letting you asphyxiate before my eyes.”
“You are,” said Keith, trying to meet her eye. “It’s alright.”
“No it’s not! How could it be? Keith, you are not dying when there’s still air left between us.”
“I’m not endangering your life.”
“You’re going to die!”
Allura shook her head, bewilderment clear in her eyes.
“I’m the black paladin,” said Keith. “It’s my decision.”
Allura scoffed. “Well I’m the princess of Altea. And what I say goes.”
“You’re one of the last Alteans,” Keith protested. “Allura, you’re too important.”
“And you’re the only human-Galra hybrid we know of.”
“You’re the only one practised in Altean alchemy left!”
“You’re the head of Voltron!”
“That can be replaced. Allura, you can’t be-“
“You are not disposable, Keith,” she snapped.
There was fear in her eyes, and a little wetness too, but neither was going to mention it.
“We need you to win this war. Coran needs you.”
“You are our best pilot and swordsman.”
“You have magic powers!”
“You are the bridge between us and the Galra-“
“I care about you so much Allura!” Keith blurted. “You’re my friend, and I love you, and I-“ He was choking up, throat burning and chest hurting. “I can’t lose you.”
Silence, stunned silence. For a minute, Allura couldn’t speak, couldn’t even move. Then her eyes welled with tears, and she said:
“You’re my family. You’re all my family. Don’t make me lose that.”
Keith felt like he was suffocating already, even though the gauge on his oxygen showed he clearly still had a little left. Even so, his throat felt tight and he didn’t realise his head was shaking until Allura reached out to stop him.
“Please,” she said. “Let me transfer you the oxygen. I can’t- don’t make me lose you.”
“I’m your family?” Keith asked, voice a little hoarse, hands a little shaky.
It was hard to tell if what he was feeling was due to the dwindling oxygen, or the very painful, very abrupt realisation that whatever way this went, someway or another someone was going to lose another member of their family.
“Of course,” Allura replied, softer than before. “Of course you are, Keith. You’re all-“
She stopped, tried to place a hand over her mouth to hide her grief-stricken expression but found herself blocked by her helmet.
“You’re all my family,” Allura said. “After I lost… after Altea, when it was just Coran and I left, he was the only one and I thought it was going to stay that way. I thought the only way to gain back any part of what I’d lost, to avenge it, was to defeat Zarkon. A-and in helping me trying to do that you’ve all… you’ve all become something and I cannot lose you.”
Keith was stunned into silence, feeling light to the head and caught between crying and laughing as they continued to spin, constantly, and aimlessly. He watched a distant star cross from one side of Allura’s head to the other, then another, and another, until they’d circled back to the first star.
“I didn’t really have a family,” he said. “Krolia left. And my dad died when I was young. And no one else really cared, after that.”
He felt numb out here, which was probably the oxygen doing its tricks, but Keith couldn’t find it to be concerned. Just upset. He was upset, and he didn’t want to make Allura cry but she was. Why was she?
“You’re all like a family,” he said. “Shiro cared, and then there was… all of you, so many of you who cared.”
He swallowed, wincing at the dryness in his throat. Allura was clinging to his arm tightly, itching to link their suits and transfer what precious oxygen she had. But Keith couldn’t really focus on that, on anything.
“You’re not really like a sister,” he said. “But I guess that’s the point. You all don’t… have to be anything like that, like something that was there from the start. You’re just here, now, and you’re my family, whatever that means.”
Allura sniffled, and it made Keith frown.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
It hurt to speak. It hurt a lot.
“Don’t cry ‘Lura-“
“You don’t cry,” she said, failing to convince anyone.
“You’re my family,” said Keith, or maybe he’d slurred it. “And I lost all my family, before. So don’t.”
He pat her arm, clumsily, short on air, just where the latch protecting her oxygen supply sat.
“You keep that. So you can see the others. They’re your family.”
“They’re your family too!” Allura insisted, grabbing his hand tighter.
“I know.”
Ugh, he felt dizzy. Kind of sick to the stomach, kind of weirdly comfortable.
“Best family I ever had,” said Keith.
Allura was frowning, tears in her eyes but also fierce determination, so when she opened her mouth to speak-
“Holy shit!”
Keith frowned, and Allura’s deepened. Did she- did she usually sound like that? Did she even know that word? Okay Allura definitely didn’t laugh like that so what-
“I found them! Oh my god I found them!”
The near manic laughter that had suddenly erupted over their comms continued, leaving the pair disorientated and overwhelmed by noise. Frowning, Keith twisted, searching the dark skies around them, which were suddenly not as empty as before, not when a rapidly growing red and white speck was closing in on them.
“Lance?” He blurted, then half choked on the word given how much it hurt to breathe.
“I found them!” Lance continued to yell, now that his comm had abruptly caught onto their signal. “Impulsive pilots one and two! I’m coming to your rescue!”
Allura burst into laughter. Keith was so stunned and also in pain that he didn’t think he could react anymore than starring, shocked, as Lance steered Red towards them.
“Hold on,” Lance instructed, a second before Red’s jaws were opening to grab them.
Keith was sure he caught a hint of the others popping up on the channel, just after the lion closed around them. There wasn’t time to process really, not in that moment at least, because one foot into the cockpit and his helmet was being ripped right off. Allura’s face, then Lance’s, was smiling at him as they were all pulled into a jumbled, bone crushing, perfect hug. The spinning stopped, he was still and he was grounded, as long as he kept holding to them.