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“How do you play,” Iwaizumi says, face scrunched up in confusion.
“It’s easy,” Oikawa answers excitedly. “One player thinks of a word and the others try to guess it by giving letters!” He smiles triumphantly, slapping the pen and paper on the table in front of them.
“That’s dumb,” Iwaizumi says, face deadpan as he stares at Oikawa. Oikawa’s smile falls and turns into a pout. The pout. The one Iwaizumi can never say no to. He sighs angrily and sits down at the table, waiting for Oikawa to follow.
They end up playing for hours. Their vocabulary is small and they still don’t fully understand how to play but they have fun and that’s all that matters to them. The next time they see each other, Oikawa brings a pen and paper. That’s how it starts.
It’s the first fight they’ve ever actually had. They haven’t talked for a week- such a stark contrast from all their fights prior. Iwaizumi expected Oikawa to come barreling into his room a few hours later. But he hadn’t. Still, a small part of Iwaizumi hopes he would come back and they would move on. Iwaizumi was starting to miss Oikawa (not that he would ever tell him that) and he was restless.
The tenth day, Iwaizumi’s mother told him they would be going to the Oikawa household. A part of Iwaizumi was glad that he could see Oikawa and they could maybe talk and make everything better. But a larger part of him was still angry. He screamed while his mother dragged him over and he was stuck there.
The boys saw each other and they reluctantly sat next to each other during dinner. Oikawa refused to look at Iwaizumi and it was frustrating as hell. Iwaizumi tried telling himself he didn’t care but it hurt. They were best friends after all.
After dinner, they were set loose. Usually, they go off running. Either outside to play volleyball until the sun dipped low in the sky or in Oikawa’s room talking about stars and space and whatever came out. They didn’t today. Iwaizumi helped the women clean up and then he sat at the table, glaring at the wood as if it had done something.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees movement but he steels himself to keep his gaze on the table. Eventually a piece of paper landed in front of him. He stares at it.
_’_ _ _ _ _ _
Iwaizumi understands it right away. He looks up at Oikawa, who gave him a tiny smile, and then down at the paper. “A,” he whispers lowly. It makes Oikawa laugh softly and he draws a head. “I.” A nod and the space gets filled out.
Iwaizumi takes his time whispering letters, sometimes dropping a random one like Z or F to make Oikawa laugh. Soon, the whole phrase stares up at him. I’m sorry . It makes something in Iwaizumi hurt. He felt bad for being angry at his friend. He told him so and Oikawa laughed, shaking his head and grabbing his hand to drag him up to his room. The argument was forgotten about almost instantly.
Their first year of high school was hell for Iwaizumi. Oikawa, as expected, was a hit with all the girls. All their free time would be spent trying to hide from people or excusing themselves from conversations. Iwaizumi was tired of it.
One day Oikawa suggested that they have lunch on the roof. He has heard a rumor that you could get up there through a door and it was completely secluded. They tried it a few weeks later and true to the rumor, no one was there. They decided to make it their spot. They’d watch the sky and talk about everything up there. On busier days they would sit in silence while doing work. Oikawa would usually finish first and stare off into space.
This day was no different. Iwaizumi sat with his legs crossed on the floor of the roof. Oikawa was beside him, leaning on his arms and staring at the trees around them. It was peaceful. But Iwaizumi could tell Oikawa was getting bored. He was shifting more from side to side, sneaking glances at Iwaizumi and sighing loudly.
After the third sigh, Iwaizumi looked up exasperated. “What now, Shittykawa?” His tone comes out less annoyed than he intended and it pissed him off. Oikawa gives him a small smile and sits up, whipping out a pen and paper.
“I’m bored, Iwa-chan! Let’s play,” he starts writing on the paper without an answer. Iwaizumi sighs and gives up, putting down his work. He’ll do it at home. “A,” he says as Oikawa finishes. “E,” he says, looking up at the sky. He always did the vowels first. “I,” Oikawa hums beside him as he thinks. “O,” a scoff. “U,” another hum.
They stay like this for a while. “You’ve filled it up already,” Oikawa whines as he pokes Iwaizumi. He groans and sits up to look at the paper. I heard Makki has a crush on a boy. It makes something in Iwaizumi’s chest flutter. They’ve never talked about that before and it scares him.
“So?” His words come out defensive and he saw Oikawa flinch subtly. “So,” he retorts, a childish scowl on his face, “he’s gay!” The last word is said in a low hush. “I don’t get it?” Oikawa groans.
“He’s the first kid to come out! It’s huge!” Iwaizumi rolls his eyes and he’s above to shove Oikawa but the bell rings and interrupts them. They get up and walk away, the conversation still ringing in Iwaizumi’s head.
It’s a few days after Oikawa’s accident. He’s been told he can’t leave his house until he’s fully healed, which means no volleyball. It’s different without Oikawa at practice and Iwaizumi reminds himself to tell him that as he walks over to his house.
He lets himself into the Oikawa household and walks straight into Oikawa’s room without knocking. He walks in on Oikawa, face scrunched up in pain and walking. He looks up and gasps, staring at Iwaizumi like a deer in headlights. “Oikawa,” Iwaizumi says, glaring at him. Oikawa gives him a small smile before making his way to the bed. He sits and after a moment Iwaizumi sits down next to him.
”Let’s play,” Oikawa says, ignoring the look on Iwaizumi’s face. “Fine,” he grinds out, taking out his homework so he can work on it while they play.
They stay like that for a while, Iwaizumi doing homework while Oikawa fills out letters. A few minutes later and Oikawa slowly whispers “done.”
Iwaizumi looks up and looks at the paper. IT HURTS SO MUCH, the paper screams at Iwaizumi. His throat feels tight and he looks up at Oikawa, mirrow frowns on their faces. “One sec.”
Iwaizumi puts his homework on the desk and sits back down on the bed, arms wrapping around Oikawa. They stay like that all night, wrapped up in each other.
They’re studying late at night during their second year. A big test was coming up and they decided to spend the day holed up in Iwaizumi’s room. It’s been hours and Oikawa has started to get restless again.
“Iwa-chan,” he faux whispers, leaning closer to Iwaizumi. He grunts as a response. “Let’s take a break! I can’t see straight anymore.” Iwaizumi doesn’t turn around but he can tell Oikawa has a pout on his face. Iwaizumi isn’t winning this one and he knows it.
A sigh and a shuffle of paper later and they’re on the floor with a piece of paper between them. It’s Iwaizumi’s turn and he’s nervous. He’s been planning this for a week and he still doesn’t feel ready for it. He writes on the paper, ignoring the panic that bubbles up in his chest. _’_ _ _ _
Oikawa looks at the paper, analyzing it. Iwaizumi always thought he looked too much into it. “A,” Iwaizumi’s breath catches in his throat. He fills in the A.
“I?” Iwaizumi nods and writes it down. He regrets doing this right now. But it’s too late. Oikawa looks up at him, eyes scanning him and it feels like he’s staring straight at his soul. “M.” Another nod.
“G?” Iwaizumi doesn’t look up this time. Oikawa doesn’t say anything as he looks down at the paper and it’s making Iwaizumi’s stomach churn.
“Iwa-chan…” It rings out loudly in the silence of the room. Iwaizumi doesn’t look up, a lump in his throat. “Is the last letter a Y?” Iwaizumi nods despite himself and Oikawa breaks out into a smile, flinging himself on Iwaizumi, who lets out a loud yelp.
“Shittykawa, get off of me! You’re heavy!” Oikawa is laughing loudly and Iwaizumi almost forgets what just happened until he manages to throw Oikawa off of him and he lands on the paper. He stares at it and Oikawa smiles. The one where his tongue peeks out. “You’re not…” Iwaizumi trails off, looking at Oikawa expectantly. He’s met with a confused look.
“You’re not disgusted?” Iwaizumi says it fast, like ripping off a bandaid. Oikawa’s head tilts for a moment in confusion before his mouth opens up into a little ‘o’. “Iwa-chan! I would never be disgusted by you! I mean, you do smell bad some days and your hair is definitely a little scary but I wouldn’t be disgusted by you!”
Iwaizumi holds back from throwing something at him. “I meant because I’m… you know…” Iwaizumi looks down again, avoiding Oikawa’s eyes.
“Iwa-chan…” Oikawa places a hand on Iwaizumi’s shoulders and when he looks up, they make eye contact. “I’m bisexual. Have I not told you?” It takes a few seconds for the words to process. Then Iwaizumi lets out a strangled noise and Oikawa is laughing.
“How did you even find out you liked boys?” Oikawa winks and grabs a piece of paper. “You’re gonna have to guess!” They spend the whole night learning about each other.
It’s their third year. They didn’t make it to nationals and it hurts. Iwaizumi feels like he failed and he blames all their shortcomings on himself. He should have done better, should have tried harder.
It’s been weeks but he’s still upset about it. He’s on Oikawa’s bed and they’re watching a movie on his laptop, something with a lot of lasers. Oikawa pauses the movie suddenly and sits up. Iwaizumi stares at him, watching him silently.
“Let’s play,” he says when he comes back, a piece of paper in hand. Iwaizumi gives him a sad smile. Soon, they wouldn’t be doing this every day. They wouldn’t tell each other the latest drama or secrets about each other or random facts. Maybe they’ll find a way to play through the phone.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Iwaizumi squints, staring at it hard. He can’t make sense of it. “A,” he says, watching Oikawa draw a head. “I,” Oikawa fills in the first word. “E,” the last letter of the second word. “O,” two words have o’s. “U,” the last word has an o and u. “Y,” the last word is you.
Iwaizumi sucks in a breath when his brain catches up to the words on the paper.
I _O_E YOU
”Oikawa,” Iwaizumi whispers, not looking up from the paper. His chest hurts and there’s a lump in his throat. “You’re missing two letters, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa’s voice sounds strained, tight. His throat probably feels the same way Iwaizumi’s does right now. “X,” he says and Oikawa lets out a soft smile. He lists another random letters until Oikawa’s running out of things to draw on the man. He has a nose and three fingers and two toes and hair.
“L,” and Oikawa pauses for a second before filling it in. Iwaizumi looks up at Oikawa, dark brown meeting hazel. “V,” Oikawa smiles wide.
“You got it!” Iwaizumi wants to laugh or cry or something else. “Oikawa-“
”Hajime.” The sound of his name coming from Oikawa’s mouth makes him pause. “I’m serious about this. I, uh, I’ve liked you for a long time. And I know I shouldn’t have waiting this long but I was scared and-“
Iwaizumi doesn’t let him finish. He jumps on top of him, pressing their lips together. It wasn’t their first kiss (they had that when they were 10 because Oikawa didn’t want to walk around not having his first kiss) but this was different. This was real.
They pull away and laugh, pressing their foreheads together. They’re smiling and staring into each other’s eyes. “I love you, Hajime.”
”I love you, Tooru.”