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Bad days were inevitable. Taehyung knew this. As he stepped into he and Jimin’s apartment on a rainy afternoon, he just wished that they didn’t have to be. He’d had the absolute worst day of classes and work today, and he’d felt close to crying since this morning when he’d accidentally dropped his coffee on his way to class and ended up spilling it everywhere. He wasn’t completely sure why, but every little thing that had gone wrong today seemed to crush his spirits more and more, almost bringing him to tears for the stupidest reasons.
He’d almost been late to his first class, he received a bad mark on a test he’d taken last week, messed up during a big presentation, forgot to bring his lunch, andhad been yelled at by several customers at the bookstore he worked at. So many things had gone wrong for him today, and on top it all off, he’d had a fight with Jimin the night before that he couldn’t stop thinking about.
Taehyung thought back to last night. He and Jimin had started arguing over chores, which somehow escalated in a screaming match between the two about money, and how Taehyung wasn’t appreciative enough, and how Jimin was never home and they had both ended up saying some things they didn’t mean. Fighting was inevitable, and Taehyung knew this too. That didn’t make him feel better when they’d gone to sleep still upset with one another, though, Jimin curled up on the couch while Taehyung slept alone in their bed.
Taehyung and Jimin hardly ever fought, and if they did it was never too bad, usually resolving whatever issue they had quickly. Last night, though, felt different. Taehyung knew something was still wrong this morning when he woke up and Jimin had already gone to work without kissing him goodbye. He always kissed him goodbye.
Maybe that was actually when Tae’s bad day had started.
Today of all days he wished he could just crawl into Jimin’s arms and ask for kisses and cuddles and let himself relax, but he knew that things would still be tense when Jimin got home from work. The feeling made his heart sink even more. He was sick of everything in his life being so stressful at the moment, and having a dumb fight with Jimin made everything feel a million times worse.
Kicking off his shoes, Taehyung stumbled through the apartment and flopped himself straight onto the couch in their living room, trying not to think about the assignments he needed to start working on, or the dishes that needed to get done, or what he was going to do for dinner tonight. He didn’t want to think about any of it. All he wanted to do was lay there and rest.
Jimin’s pillow was still there from last night, along with a spare blanket, which Tae pulled over himself and hugged the pillow close. They smelled like his boyfriend, and a wave of sadness washed over him at the thought of Jimin sleeping out here all alone last night.
He knew he shouldn’t just lay there in self-pity. He needed to do the dishes before Jimin got home. He needed to start dinner before Jimin got home. He didn’t want there to be a reason for them to fight tonight. Taehyung knew he didn’t have the energy to deal with that today. If they fought tonight too, Taehyung knew that he would surely break down. He didn’t want to go to sleep again without his Jiminie by his side.
Taehyung felt a lump growing in the back of his throat at that thought, and he tried his hardest to will it away. He didn’t want to cry. He had shit to do. The lump wouldn’t go away though, and the burning behind his eyes wouldn’t disappear either so he shut them tightly and tried to take deep breaths.
Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.
He didn’t know how long he was laying there before he heard the front door open and shut loudly. He winced, bolting to sit up straight at the sound. Had he started dozing off?
He suddenly felt like crying again. He could hear Jimin shuffling through the entry way and into the kitchen, and his stomach twisted at the knowledge that he hadn’t gotten anything done before he got home.
Jimin worked long hours so that they could afford to live there. So that they could pay bills and have food to eat and so that Taehyung could be in school. All that Tae had to do were little things around the house, and he hadn’t even done them, which meant another fight was coming for sure. He didn’t want to fight. He would rather disappear.
He curled himself closer around Jimin’s pillow on the couch, waiting for his inevitably upset boyfriend to come into the room at any minute.
As if on cue, Jimin called out through the apartment. “Taehyung-ah?” The lack of a usual nickname caused Taehyung to feel like crying again, and he shut his eyes tighter, not replying.
“Taehyung-ah, did you pick up groceries?” Jimin asked through the apartment, and Tae’s heart sank. He completely forgot that he was supposed to go get groceries after work. It had slipped his mind after everything that had happened today.
Jimin then stepped into their living room and flicked the lights on, but didn’t move from the entryway when he saw his boyfriend on the couch.
Tae carefully looked up at his boyfriend, expecting to see anger on his face, but was met with something else. Jimin seemed almost expressionless. There were bags deep beneath his eyes and he looked so tired that it made Tae’s heart pang a bit. Jimin must have had a long day of working at his dance studio, and Tae felt guilty for feeling so sorry for himself. He immediately wanted to comfort his boyfriend. He wanted to make him smile and giggle and forget how tired he was, but there was still tension in the air between them.
“Did you go grocery shopping?” Jimin asked again.
“No,” Tae answered quietly. “I forgot.”
He could see his boyfriend’s expression shift a little into one of concern.
“I forgot. I’ll go tomorrow. I’m sorry Jiminie,” Tae added quietly.
Jimin just sighed, running a hand through his hair. “What are we gonna eat tonight then?”
Taehyung blinked a few times. He already felt so small and sad, and now he felt even worse for forgetting the groceries. “I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I had a bad day and I was thinking about other things and I forgot. I didn’t mean to,” he mumbled.
Jimin sighed again, and then silence enveloped the room. Taehyung was still trying his best not to break down, even though all he wanted to do was just let himself cry. He wanted his boyfriend to come over and hold him and comfort him, but he felt like Jimin was still mad at him from last night, and now the grocery thing was added on top of all of that. The burning behind Taehyung’s eyes worsened and he tried desperately to blink them away. He was acting like such a baby, but he couldn’t help it.
“Are we still in a fight?” He asked suddenly, not quite meeting Jimin’s eyes.
“Taehyung-ah,” Jimin started, but Tae winced at the name. Jimin hardly ever called him by his full name unless they fought or were talking about something very serious, and it made the boy sink deeper into himself knowing that Jimin kept calling him that.
Tae’s bottom lip trembled, and he dared to look up at Jimin again. All he could see in his boyfriend’s eyes was emptiness again. Tae just wanted was to feel loved right now, but he couldn’t even see any love in Jimin’s eyes anymore.
“I don’t want to fight,” Tae trembled. “Not right now, I feel weird. I don’t feel good. I don’t wanna fight.” He curled further in on himself. “It makes me feel like you hate me.” The boy buried his face into Jimin’s pillow again, finally letting himself cry. His body shook, all of the emotions he’d built up from last night and from his horrible day finally spilling out. “Jiminie,” he sobbed, his breathing erratic.
He could feel Jimin’s eyes on him for a moment, and the horrible thought that maybe he actually did hate him came into his mind, causing him to panic even more, a distressed whine escaping his lips.
Then, there was a soft weight on his head, Jimin’s hand suddenly there running through his hair. “Hey, I don’t hate you, Tae Tae,” Jimin said quietly, but it only made Taehyung cry harder. “Tae, please look at me,” Jimin tried again softly.
Taehyung looked up slowly to see his boyfriend crouching in front of him on the couch. Jimin looked distraught as well, and Tae hiccupped loudly. Jimin quickly reached forward to wipe some of the wetness from Tae’s cheeks. “I’ve been taking my stress out on you and it’s not okay. I’m sorry.” Tae just whined and Jimin went back to stroking his hair. “The groceries don’t matter okay? It’s not a big deal.”
Taehyung closed his eyes tightly and hiccupped again. He still felt horrible, as if he’d disappointed Jimin. “I hate today,” he cried. “I keep messing everything up and now I’m messing usup and you probably hate me.” He sounded frantic as he cried.
“Shh, look at me.” Jimin brushed Tae’s hair away from his face and Tae couldn’t resist. He carefully opened his eyes again Jimin leaned forward to plant a gentle kiss to his forehead. “I don’t hate you, baby. I could never hate you.” He continued playing with Tae’s hair. “I will always love my Tae baby.”
Taehyung hiccupped again. “I just-“ he started, lips trembling. “I had a bad day,” he whimpered.
“I know,” Jimin whispered, then paused for a moment. “Can I join you up here?” He asked, and Tae nodded slowly, making room for Jimin to climb up onto the couch with him. Jimin sat on the end of the couch and patted his lap gently.
Taehyung scooted closer until his head was safely in his boyfriend’s lap, Jimin’s pillow long forgotten and fallen to the floor. “I don’t want to fight anymore,” he mumbled against Jimin’s leg. “I hate it.” He spoke so quietly, and his voice was laced with sadness.
“It’s okay now, Tae Tae. The fight was stupid. It doesn’t matter anymore, okay?” Jimin reasoned. Tae nodded against his lap and Jimin continued. “I’m sorry for everything I said.”
“I’m sorry too,” Taehyung whispered. “No more stupid fights,” he huffed softly. “-don’t wanna lose you.”
Jimin frowned, letting his fingers lightly trace across Taehyung’s face. “Baby,” he mumbled. “Even if we fight, you’ll never lose me, and I’ll never ever hate you,” he said seriously.
Tae hummed at his words. “Promise?” He asked quietly.
“Promise. Besides, I’d never be able to find another soulmate. That’s impossible.”
Taehyung giggled softly against Jimin’s leg at his words, and felt himself slowly calming down.
“I love you so much, Jiminie.”
“I love you too Tae Tae,” Jimin replied.
“Do you want to talk to me about your day?” Jimin asked softly. “It might make you feel better.”
Taehyung whined, pressing his face further into his boyfriend’s lap. “It was just bad,” he said quietly. “Did bad on a test and a presentation. Mean customers at work,” he huffed out. Then, quieter, he added “thought you were mad at me.”
“Baby,” Jimin mumbled. “C’mere.” The older weakly tried pulling Taehyung up, to which he complied, pressing himself into Jimin’s arms. The older held him tightly.
“I’m sorry you had a bad day, Tae. But you still have time to improve your grades. It doesn’t matter.” He pressed kiss to the side of Taehyung’s face. “And who cares about those customers? They’re not important. They’re big dummies if they’re mean to you.”
Tae giggled softly and Jimin continued.
“And I’m not mad at you. We shouldn’t have gone to bed last night upset with each other. I’m sorry we did.” Jimin slid his hands gently beneath Tae’s shirt and rubbed circles on his back, knowing exactly how he needed to be comforted. “My sweet boy.”
Tae hummed against Jimin’s neck.
“Do you want me to order takeout for dinner? We can just get groceries together tomorrow night. How does that sound?”
“Okay,” Tae said quietly.
Jimin smiled then and peppered Tae’s face with kisses. “My pretty baby,” he smiled, making Tae blush and press a soft kiss to Jimin’s jaw.
“My pretty Jiminie,” he said back, finally feeling the stress seep out of his body.
Tae supposed that bad days and fights were inevitable, but so was loving Jimin. And now that he was warmly tucked into the boy’s arms, he knew he would be just fine.