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NCT 127 were nearing the end of their North American tour and the boys couldn’t be happier, but they were also beyond tired. It was exhausting going from city to city so close together with little to no recovery time between. They weren’t complaining, they knew this was part of the job. Most of the time they were very good at keeping their fatigue in check and not letting the fans notice, but there were rare occasions where they let it slip. Today was that day for Yuta.
They had just finished their last song and we're going to say goodbye to the fans. Every member had a designated spot and Yuta was backing up to his while he adjusted his mic set when he felt a hand on his hip. Someone was pushing him to his left because he was too far off. He glanced out of the corner of his eye and saw it was Mark that had corrected him.
The end of the concert went as planned and they waved one last time to the fans as they headed backstage. Every member was taking off their headsets and getting changed into their own clothes so they could head back to the hotel. It was an energetic atmosphere even though they had just been performing for so long but that was normal. Even though they were tired after their performances they were also excited.
Except for Yuta. He couldn’t get that screw up out of his head. He just knew that everyone had seen it, the fans, staff, and members. He just knew they all thought he was a failure and messed up their last stop. As they all got their bags and headed towards the bus Yuta had his headphones in and kept his attention on his phone. He didn’t want anyone making him feel any worse than he already did.
As they made it on the bus he took a seat on the couch not wanting to get into a bunk for the ten-minute ride to the hotel. He kept scrolling through his phone feeling lucky that no one had bothered him before now. He wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. No sooner had the thought crossed his mind and Mark sat down next to him looking like he wanted to talk. Yuta shook his head and went back to his phone. To his surprise, Mark didn’t push it. He just put his arm around Yuta and laid his head on his shoulder. This surprised Yuta because even though Mark was a loving dongsaeng, he rarely showed affection to the Japanese boy.
When they reached the hotel Yuta was the first off the bus and immediately in an elevator towards his room with Taeyong. Mark watched him go and caught up with his leader. “Taeyong hyung, can I switch rooms with you tonight? I’m pretty sure Yuta is beating himself up about missing his mark at the end of the concert and I wanna talk to him and make sure he’s okay.” Taeyong smiled and handed Mark his keycard. “Of course Mark. I think that’s a great idea. I’ll let Jungwoo know what’s up. Let me know if you need me.”
Mark thanked Taeyong and hoped Yuta wouldn’t mind the change. Sometimes the older would get annoyed at sudden changes but Mark was praying this time would be different. He hadn’t been close with Yuta but he had always wished they could be. Mark had been crushing on his hyung for quite a while now but he knew Yuta didn’t and probably never would feel the same way so he just always stuck close to Haechan. Everyone always shipped them together anyway so it was easy to do. Wouldn’t their fans be surprised if they knew who Mark really liked?
He wasn’t worried about Yuta not accepting him for his age or the fact that he was a guy. He knew Yuta was at least bisexual if not gay. They had never outright talked about it but the way the older would talk about other male idols was pretty clear. He was more worried that Yuta would only ever see him as his little brother and member. He hoped he was wrong and that the leap of faith he was taking tonight would pay off.
As he entered Yuta and Taeyong’s room he heard the shower running. He was actually thankful Yuta would be occupied for a few minutes because it would give him time to think about what he was actually doing. He was kind of freaking out because this was so out of his comfort zone. He didn’t have as much time to think as he had hoped though because he heard the shower shut off. He set his bag down and sat down on the bed he knew was Yuta’s. It was made but not as neatly and perfectly as the other which was obviously Taeyong's.
When Yuta thought he couldn’t avoid Taeyong anymore he came out of the bathroom but stopped when he saw Mark sitting on his bed. What was Mark doing here and where was Taeyong? “Mark? What’s going on?” He didn’t want to seem upset to the younger so he tried to act normal and start getting ready for bed. “I asked Taeyong hyung if we could switch rooms tonight because I wanted to talk to you...that is if you don’t mind hyung.”
Yuta turned around and noticed Mark was blushing and seemed shy which was not how he normally acted. Something was up and he wasn’t sure what was going. “Okay...what did you want to talk about?” He hoped this wasn’t going to be too heavy of a subject. He really just wanted to go to bed and forget the whole night. He quickly changed and took a seat next to Mark on the bed. “Is something wrong? What’s up that you wanted to talk to me instead of Taeyong?”
Mark was staring at his fingers but finally looked at Yuta when he started to speak. “Well, it’s actually two things. The first thing I wanted to talk about was the end of the concert. I know you’re beating yourself about the whole missed mark thing, but you’re honestly the only one worried about it. No one else is upset and I just wanted to make sure you weren't too hard on yourself hyung.”
Yuta just stared at Mark for a good thirty seconds. The younger had never said anything like that to him before and it made him almost tear up that he would care this much to check up on him. He pulled Mark into a small side hug and ruffled his hair, “Thanks Mark, it means a lot that you cared enough to come and talk to me about it. Honestly...I have been beating myself up about it. I know it’s trivial but it seemed like such a big thing at the time. I feel like the fans are paying more attention to me lately and I don’t wanna mess up in front of them. I’ve been stressing about it more than I have let on.”
Mark nodded, “I understand but they know we're human and they don’t care. They just want you to be happy and healthy just like the members do...like I do.” Mark looked down at his hands blushing again. Yuta wasn’t sure what was going on with Mark today. He seemed extra shy which was not like him at all. “Why are you all blushy and shy today Mark?”
Mark cleared his throat and started fidgeting, “Well, it’s cause of the second thing I want to talk to you about. I’m anxious about your reaction.” He turned towards Yuta and took his hand in his own. “I know you love me and you know I love you too right hyung?” He finally looked at Yuta who nodded but still had a questioning look on his face. “Well, the thing is…ugh, why is this so hard?” Yuta noticed the way Mark was absentmindedly rubbing his knuckles as he continued to hold his hand and the way their knees were touching. He realized how much he liked being this close to Mark.
He had never looked at Mark this way before but he was really seeing now, how beautiful he was. He felt bad for not seeing it before. He had always loved the boy but he thought about it in a different way and he was nervous because he thought he might know where Mark was going with this now. Yuta had never been outright vocal about his sexuality but he knew people suspected he was at least bisexual. In the last year or so though he realized he was actually gay. He never thought they needed to discuss it though because he never thought anyone would want to be with him, especially from their group.
“Mark, it’s okay. Whatever it is I can promise you we can talk about it and everything will be okay.” He gave the boy his best smile hoping it would ease the younger's nerves. “Thank you hyung, I appreciate that but I’m still worried.” Yuta squeezed his hand to reassure him, “You can trust me, Mark. Just be honest, what’s worrying you?”
Mark sighed, he knew this was his chance. He had to be honest. “Well like I said I love you hyung...like, I really love you.” He could tell his hands were starting to sweat from being nervous so he tried to pull them back out of Yuta’s but he couldn’t. Yuta just held them tighter and smiled. “I love you too Mark..and I think I just might really love you the same way.”
Mark’s head shot up and he looked at Yuta with wide eyes. “What? You do? Wait...I’m confused.” This made Yuta laugh, “I’m guessing you didn’t expect that answer?” Mark shook his head. “Well no, not at all. I wasn’t sure you liked guys, let alone me. Someone in the group and younger than you.”
“Well if I’m being honest...I didn’t realize until somewhat recently that I was gay and I didn’t wanna make a big deal about it. As for you...I have always loved you Mark but it’s grown to be more than that. My love for you growing is way more recent than me realizing I liked guys so I’m not sure where we go from here, but I would like to explore the possibilities if you want to.”
Mark still couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He could feel tears starting to prick the corners of his eyes and before he could even try to stop it from happening they started rolling down his cheeks. “Fuck Mark, why are you crying? Is this not what you want?” Yuta was freaking out, he thought this was what Mark would want but maybe he was wrong.
Mark pulled Yuta into a hug and started crying into his shoulder. “They’re happy tears hyung. I’m so fucking happy you wouldn’t believe it.” Yuta breathed a sigh of relief and hugged back. This was going to be a new journey for the two but he couldn't wait to see where it took them. Once Mark calmed down he pulled back and looked at Yuta. “Can we just cuddle up tonight and you can pick an anime or something to watch? I’ll be happy with whatever you choose as long as I can be by you.”
“Sounds good to me babe.” Yuta winked and loved the blush that crept up Mark’s neck. “Oh, I am definitely gonna keep calling you that if you’re going to blush every time.” Mark groaned, “Hyung!” Yuta laughed and thought of something. “I’ll make a deal with you....if you agree to by my boyfriend, you can stop calling me hyung and just call me Yuta. What do you say?”
Yuta was knocked flat on his back. He was thankful they were on the bed. “Are you serious? Hell yes! I mean, I would say yes to being your boyfriend anyway but...thank you Yuta. I love you.” He smiled down at his boyfriend. It made him so happy to think of Yuta that way. He slowly leaned down and placed a soft quick peck on Yuta’s lips. “You’re welcome babe and I love you too.”
Once they got comfortable under the covers of Yuta’s bed, Mark snuggled up against Yuta. He wasn’t sure what anime Yuta had chosen but he didn’t care. He couldn’t be happier. He was starting to drift off to sleep when his phone buzzed. “Who is that?” Mark checked his phone, “Taeyong hyung. He wanted to make sure everything is okay.”
Yuta thought for a second…”Here, send him a picture.” He leaned over and kissed Mark’s cheek, staying there until the picture was taken. Mark giggled, “I’m gonna send him the picture and say everything went better than I could have imagined.” Almost immediately after sending the text mark got a reply. “OMFG I KNEW IT!!! I’m so happy for you guys. Sleep well.”
“I’m glad we have his blessing. That means a lot to me” Yuta nodded, “Me too.” Mark put his head on Yuta’s chest and let him play with his hair. “I’m tired. I’ll probably fall asleep soon...so thank you again Yuta. I’ll try not to bug you but this just means so much to me.” Yuta kissed his forehead, “Don’t apologize I understand. You’re welcome and you can sleep whenever.”
Mark pushed himself up just a little and looked at Yuta. “Can I have a kiss before I fall asleep?” He was blushing again and Yuta thought it was his new favorite thing. “Of course babe.” He pulled Mark down and slowly connected their lips. It wasn’t anything crazy, just a loving goodnight kiss but he tried to convey how much this really meant to him.
“Goodnight Mark...I love you”
“Goodnight Yuta. I love you too.”