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When she sees Chisato she looks like a photograph. She sits at the window of the cafe, not noticing Kanon’s hurried approach, too busy lost in the contents of her notebook. One hand rests near her face, where her fingers are idly twirling around a few smooth strands of her hair, as the pauses, absent-mindedly poised in her thoughts. Kanon doesn’t consider herself particularly good with words, but she thinks Chisato looks like something out of a poem, or a prayer, an angel against the stark backdrop of the ceaseless rain outside.
Suddenly realizing how stupid her own thoughts sound, she brushes them away as she tentatively approaches the table. As Chisato turns to her, her eyes widen with surprise for a fraction of a second before a warm smile blossoms over her face. “Ah, Kanon-san! Did you not get my message?”
Kanon stares at her in blank confusion, before moving to fish her phone out from her pocket. “No, I -” She opens Chisato’s message to find the words “Please feel free to cancel our plans today. I wouldn’t want you to have to come here in this rain.” blinking back at her. Sheepishly, she slips her phone back into her pocket. “Ah, I didn’t see because I was busy running through the rain...” An act that was ultimately fruitless, she might add; she grimaces sadly as her sopping wet hair sends a trickle down her neck. The thick humidity of the summer clings miserably to her. It’s not uncommon for her to feel out of place next to Chisato, but as they are now, with Kanon’s soaking hair plastered messily to her forehead, she feels it tenfold.
Chisato laughs softly. “Well, please, do sit down. I’m glad you’re here.”
As Kanon pulls her chair out, her eyes fall to the notebook lying on the table. “Are you working on something?”
“Hmm, not really,” Chisato answers, her own eyes lingering on the page before her. “Just finalizing a song for Pastel Palettes… although I think I’m finished with it already.” Kanon jumps slightly, as though she’s just remembered something, and Chisato doesn’t miss it. “Are you alright?”
“Oh - yes! I just remembered that I need to talk to Misaki-chan about our upcoming song myself - ah, and I need to iron out that drum solo too…” Kanon trails off, lost in her own thoughts, and Chisato’s expression shifts into one of concern.
“If you’re too busy, Kanon-san, you don’t need to come and spend time with me.”
“What?” Kanon comes back to reality, startled, to see Chisato’s genuine frown come into focus. “N-No! No, I really love hanging out with you, Chisato-san. I promise I’m not too busy. Plus,” she smiles, “even when I am busy, sometimes I really need some peace and quiet, you know?” She wants to articulate that slowly passing time like this with Chisato is the most peaceful activity of all, but can’t quite bring the words to her lips.
Chisato nods slightly. “I imagine things with your bandmates can get quite… hectic,” she says delicately. “I can imagine needing a brief reprieve from that. ...I understand the feeling, myself,” she adds, quietly, almost to herself, and something about the tone of her voice gives Kanon pause.
She bites her lip before she asks, tentatively, “Do you not get along with your band mates?”
Chisato shakes her head. “No, that’s not it… Well, it was difficult to be comfortable around them at first, but we’ve come a long way. I trust them all very much. But,” she says, and then stops. Kanon watches the sad shift of Chisato’s eyes as her gaze drifts outside, watching the rain in its relentless cascade. After a while, she continues quietly, “It feels as though, on some level, there’s always going to be a role I have to fulfill for them… A version of myself that I have to be.”
Kanon fidgets in the silence, unsure of how to respond. She feels as though Chisato’s eyes are looking at something she cannot see, and finds she wants her to tell her more. She thinks about how composed Chisato always is, how she never fumbles her words, as though all of her sentences - no matter how insignificant - are carefully put together and planned. She wants to say, you don’t have to be anyone around me, just yourself, but feels as though she might be overstepping.
“Ah,” Chisato says, breaking the silence. “What am I talking about? Do forgive me, Kanon-san -” and she laughs, a little awkwardly, a little stifled. Kanon wants to say something now more than ever, but as she tries to fumble some words to the surface, Chisato turns to face her fully. Her smile is warm and, oddly, a little shy, and it stops Kanon’s words before they form.
“In any case,” she says, “that’s why I like spending time with you so much, Kanon-san.”
Kanon’s heartbeat flutters to a gentle halt. “W-What?”
Chisato takes a sip of her tea, all elegance, seemingly oblivious to Kanon’s reaction to her words. “I mean,” she continues, “when I’m with you, I don’t have to worry about being anyone in particular, I can just be… myself. I - It’s nice, you know?” She doesn’t quite meet Kanon’s eyes as she says it, and if Kanon didn’t know any better, she’d think Chisato might be embarrassed.
“Me too!” Kanon near-shouts, suddenly filled with fierce emotion, and Chisato starts, eyes wide. “S-Sorry,” she amends quickly, face flushing. “But - I feel the same way about you, Chisato-san! It’s really fun spending time with you. It’s - it’s calming.” Her passionate statement peters out miserably, and she cringes slightly. Not for the first - or even second - time today, she laments her inability to express things in words properly.
But Chisato is smiling, far more openly than usual, her eyes crinkling softly around their edges in a way Kanon has never seen before. In a way she’s never shown to Kanon before.
“I’m glad,” she replies. Her voice rings clear with serenity. As the afternoon stretches on, languid and soothing, that smile replays itself in Kanon’s mind over and over.
