Work Text:
tulipevans posted a photo: heard there was a white nationalist gathering in town today. might stop by. hope no one is lactose intolerant!!! @dorkyfields
marleythetrashqueen: you are LITERALLY MY HEROES
dorkyfields: let’s bash those fash!!!
quitecontrary: be safe!!!! love you!! you’re both queens!!!
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sincerenoir posted a photo: live from my family reunion
wolfymcwolfface: Sirius be careful there are literal Nazis around
sincerenoir: @wolfymcwolfface that’s what i just said
jameshotterthanyou: @wolfymcwolfface don’t worry im here to keep us safe
sincerenoir: @jameshotterthanyou u mean Euphemia is here to keep us safe lol
jameshotterthanyou: …. yes
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dorkyfields posted a video: this lady is everything I aspire to be in life
marleythetrashqueen: she is going OFF ON THOSE NAZIS HELL YEAH
tulipevans: some of the nazis started saying shit about immigrants and she was NOT HAVING IT!!!!
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sincerenoir posted a photo: suddenly, a wild sneep appears!
wolfymcwolfface: Snape? At a white nationalist rally? It’s more likely than you think!
jameshotterthanyou: he’s spewing some straight garbage i think mum might hit him lol
petesfinsta: ew y is snape ther?
wolfymcwolfface: @petesfinsta Because’s he’s literally a neo-nazi??
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tulipevans posted a video: oops my hand slipped
quitecontrary: OMG OMG OMG
marleythetrashqueen: HOLY SHIT WHAT
marleythetrashqueen: YOU MILKSHAKED SNAPE?!?!!?
marleythetrashqueen: DEPRESSION: CURED
dorkyfields: it was literally one of the best things ive ever seen
quitecontrary: what happened??
tulipevans: @quitecontrary we were listening to that lady yell at nazis when suddenly snape appeared and started chiming in and it looked like one of the lady’s sons was gonna deck him (they knew him apparently?? like they were shouting his name and heckling him)
tulipevans: but then i shouted “this one’s mine” and ran over and he turned around and looked hopeful for some reason??? like i meant that in a positive way and like i’d be excited to see him even though we were at a LITERAL WHITE NATIONALIST RALLY
marleythetrashqueen: literal scum of the earth whats new
tulipevans: and then i just dumped the whole shake all over him
dorkyfields: now that’s what i call lactose intolerance
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jameshotterthanyou posted a video: I AM IN LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!
sincerenoir: THIS WAS THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!
wolfymcwolfface: Is that Snape getting milkshaked?!
jameshotterthanyou: @wolfymcwolfface yes!!!! by the most beautiful girl i’ve ever seen!!!!!! i am in love!!!!!!!!
petesfinsta: hey i no that girl
jameshotterthanyou: @petesfinsta WHAT OMG WHO IS SHE
petesfinsta: her names lily. she works at the cafe i go 2 4 the big cookies
jameshotterthanyou: @petesfinsta you are my hero omg
wolfymcwolfface: Please don’t stalk this poor girl at her place of work
sincerenoir: you need to find her and marry her since i cant. dont listen to @wolfymcwolfface.
jameshotterthanyou: i will take everyones comments into consideration (not really im with you @sincerenoir)
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marleythetrashqueen posted a photo: look who’s gone viral!!!! i know a famous person!!! @tulipevans
tulipevans: omg is that buzzfeed???
tulipevans: holy shit my twitter and rinsta notifications are blowing up
dorkyfields: becoming famous for dumping a milkshake on snape is the only respectable way to gain internet fame
quitecontrary: omg!!!! you star!!!
marleythetrashqueen: don’t forget us little people @tulipevans
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sincerenoir posted a photo: IT’S GONE VIRAL!!! THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE IMMORTALIZED IN INTERNET FAME!!!
wolfymcwolfface: the pure joy on your and @jameshotterthanyou’s faces in this video is inspiring
petesfinsta: ha ha take that snape
jameshotterthanyou: i cant wait to show my kids this video of the moment i met and fell in love with their mother
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tulipevans posted a photo: back to work after an exciting day of anti-fascist action yesterday
quitecontrary: bring home some of those cookies after your shift? <3
marleythetrashqueen: ooh the peanut butter cup ones please
dorkyfields: ^seconded
tulipevans: i’ll stash them away rn!
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petesfinsta posted a photo: got a big chocolate chip cookie 2 start tha day rite
jameshotterthanyou: is my future wife on shift rn???
petesfinsta: @jameshotterthanyou oh ya shes there i only like 2 go during her shifts bcuz she gives me the biggest cookies
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jameshotterthanyou posted a photo: fancied a quick coffee break let’s see if this place is any good
wolfymcwolfface: Be nice to this poor girl please
petesfinsta: try a cookie!!!
sincerenoir: lol you got there so fast did you run??
jameshotterthanyou: @sincerenoir …. maybe
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tulipevans posted a photo: omg i think one of the guys from yesterday is at the cafe!!
dorkyfields: nice hair/leather jacket or glasses/jersey?
tulipevans: @dorkyfields glasses/jersey. he’s super cute??? i didn’t have a chance to really notice yesterday
quitecontrary: get his number!!
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jameshotterthanyou posted a photo: having such a nice convo with milkshake girl!!!! her name is lily (this is her helping another customer rn)
jameshotterthanyou: @petesfinsta also you were right these cookies are top notch
petesfinsta: told u!!!
sincerenoir: bet you chicken out of asking for her number
wolfymcwolfface: @sincerenoir Be nice
sincerenoir: @wolfymcwolfface sorry dad
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tulipevans posted a photo: @dorkyfields @quitecontrary @marleythetrashqueen sorry ladies but you’re gonna have to wait a little longer for those cookies! I’ve got a date ;)
quitecontrary: !!!!!!!!!!!
dorkyfields: lol leave it to you to go to a counterprotest at a neo-nazi rally and come away with a bf
dorkyfields: happy for you tho <3
marleythetrashqueen: omg!! worth the extra wait!!
marleythetrashqueen: have fun don’t do anything i wouldn’t do because you know if i wouldn’t do it it must be some freaky shit!!
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jameshotterthanyou posted a photo: look how cute we are on our FIRST DATE!!!!!! biggest thanks to snivellus snorp for bringing us together <3
wolfymcwolfface: Nice job! Congrats! Glad you’re having a good date!!
sincerenoir: omg tell her what a fan i am of her work. truly stunning stuff
petesfinsta: if u d8 her mayb i can get free cookies
petesfinsta: also good 4 u!!
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sincerenoir posted a photo: couldnt wait until they woke up to tell her that shes my hero
jameshotterthanyou: will you GET OUT OF MY BED PLEASE
sincerenoir: @jameshotterthanyou um ur gf and i r having a great time u can piss off if you want
wolfymcwolfface: Ah so that was the loud thump and then shriek I heard next door
wolfymcwolfface: Well at least Lily knows what she’s getting into by dating @jameshotterthanyou now
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tulipevans posted a photo: photo from our first date!!! (aka the best first date of our life like thanks snape for being the absolute worst so I could meet James??)
quitecontrary: omg so cute!!!!!!
marleythetrashqueen: hope you had a good night!!! don’t think we didn’t notice you didn’t come home ;)))
dorkyfields: are you sharing a milkshake?? iconic
tulipevans: @dorkyfields what can I say? apparently my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard ;)