Chapter Text
Midoriya was the bane of your existence.
All wide eyes and cheerful disposition… You could ignore that, if he didn’t insist on directing the death-ray of his optimism and friendship toward you at every opportunity.
The first day of school, he ran into you in the hallway and apologized profusely while you waved him off. You thought nothing of it, until he realized you were in his class and continued with those apologies for the rest of the day.
It didn’t stop there. When class would let out for lunch, he would accost you almost immediately from his seat behind you and ask if you wanted to sit with him and his friends. It got to the point that you forced yourself into Bakugou’s circle of friends just to have a solid excuse to tell him to buzz off. This turned out to be the smartest move, since Bakugou’s mere presence could stave off most of Midoriya’s attempts.
When the class loaded into the bus to go to the training grounds or USJ, Midoriya never failed to have an empty seat next to him that he would call for you to take. You stared at him for a long moment, before pulling your lips between your teeth and making a beeline to the back of the bus where Jirou was sitting. Her earphones were in, but she nodded to your unspoken question and you jammed yourself into the seat next to her.
Luckily, it was far enough back that you could pretend Midoriya’s words didn’t reach you over the rumbling of the engines. Even that wasn’t enough to block out his gaze, curious and maybe a bit sad when you had brushed him off without a word.
After the initial USJ incident, where you had risked your own life to drag Aizawa away when the Nomu had moved to block Midoriya’s punch, he sought you out specifically to make sure you were okay. You had been injured mildly in the fight with the villains you had been warped off to, and your healing quirk had reached its limit when you used it to encourage Aizawa to just keep breathing.
You were exhausted, and Midoriya’s face appearing in front of you as you sat on the bumper of the ambulance only sapped your energy further. Your wary gaze turned up at him, and you were a bit weirded out that he was crying. He did that a lot, and it never got any more pleasant. His first words were your name, and then a series of questions about your well-being. You brushed him off with a wave of your hand, and the timely arrival of the paramedic was exactly what was needed to get him out of your personal space.
Months later, after the Kamino incident and everyone was moved into the dorms, Midoriya caught you outside as you stretched a bit before your morning run. You stared him down for a long moment as he started his own stretches, and he seemed to notice your attention and started to beam, “I-I thought maybe we could run together?”
You let out a long sigh, before putting your earbuds in and starting your run around the track. You could practically feel Midoriya’s presence behind you as he followed along, keeping pace with you easily. He would fall off soon enough, your endurance was better than he could hope to contend with, especially with a quirk like yours.
Each attempt at conversation you brush off, each invitation to join him for lunch or some other activity was declined immediately, each hopeful smile was met with a grimace of incredulity from you. Being his friend was a task you were uninterested in, his personality was too much for you to want to bother with, but he never seemed to get the hint.
Even Bakugou stepped in once or twice, whether it was because you had garnered some sort of friendship or because he wanted to one-up Midoriya, you had no idea. Either reason worked when he saw Midoriya approaching with a smile, and you were dragged away by Bakugou to some other area where Midoriya couldn’t find you.
“I don’t know why you don’t just tell him to fuck off,” Bakugou grunted as the two of you walked back to the dorms. Bakugou had his bag slung over his shoulder, and he had snatched yours from your hands to carry with his, “That’s what I do.”
“Yeah, but he still bothers you, so it’s not like that works,” You sighed and jammed your hands in the pockets of your blazer while kicking one of the loose stones on the ground, “Besides, you know I’m not like that. Grin and bear it, that’s my motto.”
“The look you give him isn’t a grin. It’s more like you swallowed a damn cockroach. He’s always been an oblivious idiot. He’ll get it through his dense head eventually that he makes you want to jump in bleach,” Bakugou was silent for a moment before he looked at you out of the corner of his eye, “I could beat his ass, if you want.”
“Thanks, but that would just get the both of you in trouble,” You let out a long breath, and the conversation lulled as the two of you approached the dorms and entered the front doors. A few others had arrived from class before you, but the two of you moved passed them to the stairs that would take you to the girls’ wing.
Bakugou thrust your bag back in your hands then took a half-step away, “Offer’s still open, just text me and I’ll thrash that nerd.”
“Thanks, Bakugou,” You laughed at his threats, despite knowing that they were one-hundred percent real. It was a bit comforting, knowing you had that to fall back on if Midoriya’s eagerness took a turn for the worse, but you knew it wouldn’t come to that. Despite being an annoying gnat, Midoriya wasn’t malicious.
In fact, you almost felt bad that you disliked him so much. Everyone else—Besides Bakugou—Seemed to adore him, so why didn’t you? Maybe it was your cynical and straightforward attitude that made it hard to want to be around someone that seemed to be your opposite. Pushing the thought from your mind, you started to climb to your assigned dorm on the second floor.
You had homework to do and thinking about Midoriya being a pest wasn’t what you wanted to focus on tonight.
Unfortunately, at the beginning of the school year, Ashido had obtained everyone’s phone numbers and added them to a group chat. It was convenient to ask about homework, or to have everyone’s phone number on hand, but it also came with the downside of Midoriya having access to your phone number.
Are you awake?
You pointedly ignored your phone’s screen as it lit up, instead focusing on your handheld game. Homework had been finished for the night, and your light was off, so you could pretend like you were actually sleeping. As you knocked out another level, you paused before selecting the next world and let out a long sigh.
Your guilt wouldn’t let you ignore him, no matter how desperately you wanted to.
Yes.
That was all you sent back, and after a few minutes your phone lit up again with another text from Midoriya, this one asking if you would meet him down in the common area. You took a quick glance at the time, making a note that everyone was already back in their dorms since it was well passed curfew. Did you want to risk getting in trouble for Midoriya to undoubtedly ask you some ridiculous question about your quirk?
No, you didn’t, but you didn’t particularly want him to come up to your dorm since he knew you were awake, so you sighed and pulled on a pair of joggers and a tank top before beginning your descent to the common room.
All the lights were off, but a figure was sitting on one of the longer couches with their phone in their hands, face lit up by the light of the screen. Obviously, it was Midoriya, but you felt a bit less derision when you looked upon him like this, when he didn’t realize you were there. His face was serious, and he looked a bit less annoying when he didn’t have that ridiculous smile plastered over his face.
Without a word, you dropped to sit on the other couch, and he jumped with a gasp, fumbling with his phone to keep from dropping it. After a moment of scrambling, he let it fall from his hand to the coffee table and instead propped his elbows on his knees to reel his nerves back in.
Patiently, you waited for whatever he wanted you to come down here for. He seemed to be stalling as he stared at the coffee table, and you finally cracked and cleared your throat. This seemed to snap him out of it, and those green eyes shot to look at you as he started to smile, “S-Sorry—”
“Don’t worry about it. Is there something you needed that you couldn’t just text me about?” You interrupted him, and his smile fell for a moment before he pushed it further and averted his eyes to the coffee table. You weren’t sure why this smile seemed to irk you more than any of the others, but a quick glance over his face revealed that it was because his eyes were unaffected by it, instead looking wary and nervous.
“There is, actually. I… I needed to tell you something.”
“What is it?”
“I…” Midoriya stopped and you heard him gulp before he looked up at you through his lashes. The smile wasn’t present, and instead he only looked a bit hurt, “I wanted to apologize.”
Not this again. You let out an aggravated sigh and leaned back on the couch, letting your head fall limply backward so you could look up at the dark ceiling. Midoriya stammered something as he got to his feet, but you paid him no mind. You were occupied with thoughts of just going to bed.
“Please, just hear me out before you get upset with me, okay? I wanted to apologize because… Uraraka heard you talking with Bakugou earlier, when you were walking to the dorms.”
Oh, you vaguely remembered her walking behind the two of you, but you didn’t realize she was so close. If that’s the case, you should probably be the one apologizing—
“She told me about it… I realized you didn’t like me very much, but I-I… I didn’t think I made you that uncomfortable. I’ll keep my distance from now on, I swear it. I just…” Midoriya stopped talking for a moment to take a deep breath, and you took that chance to lift your head to look at him with a curious gaze. He really didn’t realize it?
You supposed it was somewhat believable, Midoriya could be very perceptive when it came to most things, but in other aspects he was a total dunce, especially when it came to social cues. You sat up slowly, ready to answer him, when he finally got his nerves together and leveled you with the most serious look you had seen from him yet.
“I like you a lot. I-I… I like you more than a friend, but it’s obvious that you barely think of me as an acquaintance, let alone someone you could like… like that. I wanted to apologize and ask if we could try to be friends. I’ll tone it down, I’ll let you decide if we do anything, I won’t bother you so much,” Midoriya’s gaze finally averted to the floor between the two of you as you got to your feet. That wasn’t what you were expecting out of this, but maybe you were the dunce here.
Now that you thought it over… Really analyzed the interactions the two of you had, you could remember the shine of admiration in his large green eyes, the flush on the apples of his cheeks as he asked how your weekend was when class reconvened every Monday morning. How his eyes lingered on your face a bit longer than should be acceptable for a friend, how he sought you out after the harrowing experiences your class had gone through this school year just to make sure you were okay…
“And… And if I’ve crossed the line too far and you don’t want to be friends with me, I understand. I’ve been a blind idiot, all I could think about is trying to break down your walls. I’ve been selfish, because I thought that if I just pushed more, and forced my way in, maybe you could see me as a friend, and maybe something more someday…”
Ah, jeeze, he was starting to cry. You still couldn’t muster up the words to answer him as he turned his face to the floor to hide the tears starting to well up in his eyes. You were thankful for the darkness, because just the knowledge of him crying was starting to make your stomach twist. Seeing it in the light might make you do something you regret.
Midoriya’s voice wavered as he mumbled your name, then turned his face up to look at you with a heartbroken gaze. The moon was coming through the windows just enough to reflect off the tears on his cheeks, and there was that uncomfortable twisting again…
“Say something…? Anything, please… Even if it’s just to tell me to go away, or you don’t want to see me ever again… Anything.”
But you couldn’t. Every time you opened your mouth, nothing could escape. It was like your vocal chords were paralyzed, and it was only serving to make this moment even harder since Midoriya was taking your silence as a negative sign. After a moment longer, he clenched his eyes shut as fresh tears welled up. Scooping his phone off the coffee table, he turned to the stairs and was out of sight within seconds.
You were alone with your thoughts in the common area, and you dropped once more to sit on the couch and burying your head in your hands.
Try as you might, you couldn’t get the sick feeling from your gut. A few moments’ analyzation revealed it to be guilt. Wracking your brain for some way to fix this situation, you tried to start with that guilt sitting like a stone in your stomach.
First, you knew it was partly because he had basically confessed to having romantic feelings for you, and you hadn’t said a damn word to him. Another piece of it was the heartbroken look on his face through the entire exchange. And finally, it was a realization that all he wanted was your affection, and he tried everything he could to get even a taste of it, and you had stomped it into the dirt along with his heart.
Your fingers raked along your scalp as you moved from one subject to the other. The look in his eyes this morning when he had greeted you before class and asked if you were prepared for the end-of-unit quiz in English. His shaking hands as he explained only minutes ago that he adored you. How he must have felt when Uraraka told him that you were deeply uncomfortable with his affections, innocent as they may be…
Your heart wrenched in your chest as you lurched to your feet and made your way to the stairs that lead to the girls’ dorms. In the haze of your whirling thoughts, you knew that Aizawa could come through to check on curfew-breakers at any moment, and he didn’t need to catch you tugging on your hair over Midoriya fucking Izuku.