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What happens after the angel in shining armor saves the demon in distress? Do they ride off into the sunset to their happily ever after? Is she forever in his debt? Does it matter?
The motel room curtains are drawn tight but Meg can hear the droplets beating against the window. A storm is beginning to brew. She should leave, but not just yet. This is always the worst part; saying goodbye.
Standing naked in front of the old warped mirror; combing her dark auburn hair wet from her recent shower. The passion between her and Castiel has become rougher and more animalistic. He’s angry at the world. The angel takes Dean’s transformation as a personal failure. She can see the sorrow on his face-which translates to grumbles, harsh hands and powerful thrusts when he touches her. However, the dark side of her is enjoying the effect of the newly crowned Knight of Hell. Looking at herself she can see the blossoming bruises on her body. A mischievous grin grows on her face, as she strokes her lips puffy and swollen from coital bliss.
In the reflection she sees her angel relaxing, completely undressed on top of the bed. His eyes are watching her every move, studying her for later contemplation. He is perpetually curious about her life outside of their time together. Yet, whenever he pushes the topic it ends in a vicious argument. She can’t understand why he cares. She has stayed faithful even when he has not. The name April will always put a foul taste in her mouth.
Returning her attention back to the vessel, she ponders whether or not to apply make-up tonight. The rain will just fuck up anything she tries to accomplish, but these green eyes look amazing with heavy dark eyeliner. As she begins to paint her face, she snickers to herself. It’s kind of silly that she has retained this body. Changing appearances could help her to stay out of sight, but she knows that she will keep it forever. This is the face, the body, the voice that Castiel chose for her. It means as much to her as the actual act of saving her life when Crowley stabbed her.
Finally Castiel breaks his stare to reach over and pick up a large alarm clock from the bed stand. “What does this do?”
Catching her angel’s glorious brooding blue eyes in the mirror, she scoffs at the silly question. “It’s a clock. It tells time. I think even an angel should be able to figure that one out.”
He rolls his eyes with a deep sigh. Meg laughs out loud, because she loves it when Castiel is full tilt sass. “I know that but its huge doesn’t it do something more than tell time.”
She puts down her eyeliner pen and crosses the room to meet him on the bed. Meg makes sure to put a little bounce in her step. These larger breasts are great for getting a quick rise out of the angel. Perhaps there can be a round two before they have to go. His stunning blue eyes bounce in time with her chest, which makes her accentuate the positive. She crawls up the bed seductively, until she is almost on top of him.
Glancing at the clock, she notices that it’s also a radio. “It plays music and tells the time. You win Einstein.”
Castiel’s eyes tighten while his head cocks to one side. “You realize I understand that reference now.”
Meg now rolls her eyes with a huff, as she takes the device and finds a decent station to listen to while she completes her beauty regiment. Once again, Clarence has missed all the signals. Facing the mirror, she starts with a lovely green eye shadow. The music is a hodgepodge of different types; pretty typical for these rinky dink towns. She finds herself humming along, but startles when Castiel suddenly taps her on the shoulder.
“Dance with me.” He reaches out and takes her hand into his. She wants to pout and say no, but there is something about the way his eyes are searching hers. Way below the surface, she understands this is his apology for being gone so long and his more brutal behavior. Meg could try to persuade him that she likes it, but the demon has learned he just wants forgiveness. She nods and is swept into his arms as a new song begins to play over the aged clock.
A slow sultry guitar riff engulfs them, as they rock in time to the beat. Castiel tilts down to place an innocent kiss on each emerging black and blue mark. Then, he wraps her in his arms. Meg lets him lead, because here she is safe. There is no reason to be anything but his lover. The movement is slow, but their bodies fall in tune with each other as Chris Isaak begins to sing about Wicked Games:
"The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do.
I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.
And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you.
No, I don't want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I don't want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)"
Meg feels so vulnerable, listening to these words while dancing with her angel. When Isaak whispers to them about never wanting to fall in love with somebody like you, tears fill her eyes. The song is speaking volumes about how Castiel has ravaged her in more ways than one. He saved her life. But what kind of life did he give her in return? She has to live under the radar, running in fear from town to town. They both have burner phones for contact, but over the past year their time together has been sporadic. The loneliness is often overwhelming, but she trudges on for him.
However, that is not what is sending Meg over the edge. The dwindling grace terrifies her. He tries to down play the pain he is in, but she knows him. A part of his grace lives in her. They will forever be connected through his act of saving her. Castiel, Angel of the Lord is dying.
The thoughts are too painful, so the demon closes her eyes burying her face into his bare chest. She tries to block out the painfully resonant words, but they sear into her mind.
"No, I don’t want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I don’t want to fall in love (This world is only gonna break your heart)
With you (This world is only gonna break your heart)
No, I... (This world is only gonna break your heart)
(This world is only gonna break your heart)
Nobody loves no one. "
Relief washes over Meg as the song concludes. She goes to pull away from Castiel but his hold tightens, “Please just one more.”
The hunger for his physical touch wins as she falls back into line with his hips against hers. She ghosts her fingers over his waist and up his back. Meg desperately tries to find peace in the union of their bodies with the music.
The next song has a lighter beat, and Castiel begins to twirl his sweet demon around and around. A huge smile breaks onto Meg’s face, as she becomes lost in his playful dance. Her spirits lift, as the sparkle in his blue eyes brightens the darkness of her soul. He is her redemption and she will love him till the end. They are still swaying and twirling when Clarence pauses to listen to the words of the song.
"But you only need the light when it's burning low
Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
Only know you love her when you let her go
Only know you've been high when you're feeling low
Only hate the road when you're missin' home
Only know you love her when you let her go"
Castiel cups her face forcing Meg to gaze directly into his eyes. “I love you. I don’t need to ever let you go.”
That is the tipping point for the demon. She screams with a high pitch squeal, “You are such a bastard!” With all the rage rushing to the surface Meg seizes the alarm clock hurling it toward the wall near Cas’s head. “I hate you. You selfish ass.”
The angel of the Lord stands naked in the middle of a rancid motel room. There are bits of shrapnel all around him from the exploding clock. His mouth is open wide in surprise, and he hasn’t a clue what to do now. He can see Meg’s entire body trembling in fury, maybe even pain. Sobs are erupting from her throat, which rip at the angel’s heart. He raises his hands in surrender; speaking softly as if she were a wild animal to be tamed: “Meg, calm down. What was…”
He is not able to finish his sentence as Meg assaults him with anything she can get her hands on; shoes, pillows, a bible. All the while, she continues to yell. “Calm down? I barely get to see you. Now I have to add watching you die to my list of things to do and you want me to calm the fuck down!” Her voice cracks as she drops to the carpet. “You should have let me go.”
He takes her into his arms before she hits the ground. Sitting on the bed he pulls her into his lap. She goes limp in his embrace, exhausted from all these intense emotions coursing through her. There is absolute silence, as the angel strokes the lovely hair of his precious demon.
The storm outside turns violent as the rain pelts at the windows and the wind howls with wrath, yet inside you could hear a pin drop.
Mumbling through her swollen lips and now eyes, “You have seriously messed me up Clarence.”
He stirs softly as he begins to stroke a bruise on her shoulder. “I am sorry for these.”
Meg shakes her head and turns to face him. Placing her forehead on his, “It’s not about the bruises on my skin. When you healed me, touching your grace changed me. You marked my soul. I am a distorted version of a demon. One who cares, cries, and….” Her voice so low he can barely hear it, “misses you.”
Castiel draws her into his chest squeezing firmly. He takes a whiff of her intoxicating scent while he tries to find the words to pacify his Meg. In a hushed tone, “I will not take the life of another angel to save myself. I know this is difficult for you to understand but I will not change my mind. Meg, I don’t want to leave you and I have no desire to die, but this is final. Can’t we enjoy the time we have left, please.”
The fading angel places his fingers on his caretakers chin, caressing her lovingly. He notices that her tears have caused her eye make up to run in dark streaks down her face. He attempts to wipe the darkness from her, but to no avail. He simply kisses each cheek, praying that she will always be his.
It is several long torturous minutes before Meg replies to him. The sound is broken and husky, “You are my cause, let me save you.”
The angel is hesitant. Meg is a very crafty woman and agreeing with her could be dangerous. None the less, in the end he whispers, “Yes.”
The rain continues to pound outside but in this pathetic, rotting motel room the heavens have opened and sunshine has fallen on them. This was all she needed to hear from her lover. That he will fight, because the war has just begun.