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I can't love you

Summary:

Kevin has been best friends with Jacob since they were in diapers, a day came where the two had parted ways. by chance they meet again like strangers, but Kevin feels different about his best friend...something completely different. his heart can't contain this new found emotions towards Jacob, wait...he doesn't remember Kevin from their childhood days. how can Kevin part from Jacob again after so long?

Chapter Text

School was canceled because of a terrible snow had fallen last night and that meant Jacob slept over my house, we were left home alone since my parents went out to rent movies and buy all the ingredients for dinner. I sat in the windowsill of my room, watching the snow pile on the tree that Jacob and I carved our names into. I just turned six years old and my best friend is turning seven in three months which marks the day we first met. "Kevin! Where's my copy of mulan?" Speaking of Jacob there he is rushing into my room wearing our matching mulan shirts we bought last year for his birthday. "Oh...you look sad." The older boy stepped closer to me and sat down on the other end of the windowsill, noticing my gaze was to the tree with out names carved into it. Ironically the only part of the tree that didn't get frosted over. "Do you ever think about the future? Specially about our future...do you think we'll always be best friends?" I asked him deep into thought, my gaze still towards the tree until a small hand reached out for my shoulders. "We're more than friends, we're soulmates, remember?" Jacob held up his ring finger to my eye level and that same zip tie shaped around his finger brought a smile to my face and slowly he leaned in for a kiss on my forehead. Ugh not that again...we were children, but we did do something that changed my life before he left me...whatever, I have class today so I should get up right now its literally..3 pm! Fuck I'm late. "Thanks Hwall, for not reminding me to set my alarm." I complained out loud as I jump up from my bed, quickly throwing on a sort of clean outfits and skipping the teeth brushing then grabbed my backpack. Off to class if it didn't end already...god I hate Hwall more than the fact I have to run across campus looking a mess. Finally, I made it to the door just as the dismissal bell sounded. "Wow third time this week, Keb...are you okay ?" A worried female voice caught me heaving in the middle of the hallway, it was Lia, my best friend since middle school whom happened to help me out of wedgie town. "Yeah...I'm fine besides wanting to smack Hwall in his pretty boy face for only focusing on dick instead of academics." I scoffed lightly once i caught my breath and finally stood up straight, resting my arm on her thin shoulders. Lia was always there for me, when I heard she got accepted to the same college as me I jumped for joy and almost squeezed her to death. "Hello, stud muffin...vermin." A sassy tone entered the conversation and it was none other than my roommate. "Oh well if it isn't mr. can't keep a dick out of his ass, smelled you from a mile." Lia snapped back the dark haired male whom laughed and spat near her shoes. "At least I can get a man, dyke." Hwall smirked then pushed passed us. I shook my head as we walked to the lunch hall that spilt between inside and outside, pausing at the ramen line. Oh? I didn't tell you about Lia's other friends from highschool? Hyungjin and Minho have also suffered wedgie town, the one and only Lia had to save them too...not to mention people think she's dating Hyunjin even though she's lesbian. "Where are they?" I asked her as she grabbed a tray, filling it up with pickle radish almost over flowing the small compartment on the metal tray. "They're getting ready for Hwall's party, so its just me and you and Yeji.." The female explained to me and blushed at the mention of a name, odd. We went to the tables outside after paying for lunch as she described this tall, long haired, cat eyed beauty she apparently had a crush on. "Her smile is so cute and she's been teaching how to dance...." Let's skip pass this because its just a girl being head over heels for another girl. "....I wonder how her hand would feel around my neck--" I cut her off by shoving a boil egg into her mouth. "I love you and all, Lima, but I don't want to hear about your fantasies." Of course after we finished eating, she chased me with he shoe because she hates it when I call her Lima. Second class went by fast that I didn't realize I was back at the dorm with my roommate getting drilled by a new fling, but butt ass naked! "Ugh...At least cover up with the blanket.." I tried to suggest over the sounds of Hwall moaning and the slapping of sweaty skin, then something he did as a big fuck you to me. "Mm~ faster, daddy. fill me!" That shit definitely made me grab my clothes for tonight and bolt to my good friend Sangyeon's dorm. He doesn't fuck in the dorm unlike someone who's ass its probably wider than the grand canyon. "So he does this all the time? Tell me why you're still going to his party?...Is it because of that boy for your past?" The male politely asked me whilst I fix my hair and softly sighed. "Maybe...he has to be here unless his dad got another job back in Canada, then I'm fucked." Sangyeon stood to his feet and helped with a piece of hair that fell out of place a small cheerful smile spread across his lips. "I'm sure, he'll be there and who knows he probably didn't forget an old love." With those words Sangyeon sent me off on my way to the party. The music was already blasting and people already drunk, looks like I came at the right time. Hmm...a little drink wouldn't hurt. I slowly made my way to the bar, ordering a coke and rum for the evening. Suddenly a familiar face fell on to my lap, could it be? "K-Kevin...?" The seeming older male called for me in a soft tone, his cheeks were chubby like my best friend's, but most importantly a worn out zip tie hung from his pocket by a string. Holy shit...this is him! "O-Oh sorry...I was just wondering if we could talk in the backroom, handsome boy." The person that possibly could've been Jacob spoke in a seductive tone which made my heart skip. A quick swig of the coke and rum then I was on my way with a drunk Jacob in my hands towards the backroom. "You should sober up...Jacob?" I sounded very mature out of nowhere and sat him down on a nearby love seat and closed the door. "How'd you know my name, handsome?" That seductive tone again and this time followed by an expected sneak up on me. My wrist was pulled, then I fell on top of my drunk best friend and those feelings from childhood made their way back into this situation. "I-I know your name because--" our lips molded with each other and I couldn't believe this has happened before...when it was his sixth birthday underneath the tree expect this kiss was more mature, loving, and lustful. I can't help, but go back to that day. "Do you Kevin Moon take Jacob Bae to be your awfully wedded wife?" The older boy tried to speak in a deeper voice which made me smile and nod. "I do." "You may kiss the bride." Jacob stepped closer, his lips against mine so innocently....this side of him was different and shocking, but I loved it. "I missed you." I softly mumbled into the now heated kiss with more passion, my fingers working the buttons on his shirt and slowly pulls them off of his delicate shoulders, caressing his smooth chest. My fingers danced over his perked nipples, earning a soft moan of neediness. From my own best friend!...what the fuck have I started now?