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When his face appears on your tattered screen, you forget to breathe for a moment.
Your phone suffered quite a beating when your clumsy ass accidentally dropped it after seeing Haechan having lunch with that bitch yesterday, but not even the cracks that now adorned your screen could diminish his undeniable beauty. His tanned skin, dark hair, and obsidian eyes make your heart work overtime to supply you with that much-needed dose of oxygen—
“Hello? Hello? Hello…? Ugh, the WiFi sucks. Your face has been frozen for, like, how many seconds now.”
At long last, you snap out of it and remember to inhale, much to the relief of your lungs. Have you been staring for that long? Shit. Maybe you should’ve called instead of video-chatting him—would’ve done your vital organs a favor.
“Haechan. Sorry. So. Um, I’m coming over to your dorm now.”
“Okay, cool.”
You remember why you chose to video-chat him. “Which did you want me to bring again?” you ask, holding up two bags of chips labeled in Japanese characters you can’t pronounce.
“The green one, please,” Haechan says excitedly.
“Got it. See you in a bit.”
“Stay safe.”
You end the call and stuff the snack into your backpack with your study materials. It’s been a long day and you’re tired as fuck, but you can’t wait to see him. You start heading towards his dorm, which is annoyingly located halfway across the campus—quite a distance from yours.
In the five years you’ve been friends with Haechan, you’d never thought of him as anything but just that—a friend, and eventually, a best friend. He was just a high school classmate you were friendly with, who ended up being the only person from your school to attend the same college as you. Throughout this first semester into college, though, as you started spending more time together, you began to feel strange things that have no place in a platonic relationship.
You started becoming more aware of his quiet thoughtfulness—how he’d given you an annotated map of the campus with the locations of your classes, as well as of food spots with burgers, your favorite food in the world. How he’d walk on the side nearest the cars whizzing by on the sidewalk when you walked to the nearby mall during the weekends. How he’d slip an earphone blasting your favorite Kpop tunes into your ear whenever he saw you down, usually from a bad grade or during your period.
Of course, you saw how Haechan was also so thoughtful towards everyone else. This made you fall for him harder and, at the same time, resent him for treating everyone no different than he treated you.
Ugh, it doesn’t help that he looks unfairly gorgeous, too.
Finally, you reach his door and knock. Five seconds later, you’re greeted by that breathtaking face of his.
“Next time, I should be the one going to your dorm,” Haechan says as you enter his dorm room. “I don’t care if you keep saying mine has better air-conditioning or whatever. It’s always too dark out when you come here.”
“It’s okay, I have taekwondo tricks up my sleeve,” you argue as you take out your physics book and the Japanese chips. Haechan’s notes are already spread out on the study desk, so you flop down on the bed.
He rolls his eyes before he sits down and starts studying.
You start reading the assigned chapter while munching on the chips, taking care to not get crumbs on his sheets. The two of you pass the bag of chips back and forth, and you try to calm the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach whenever your hands touch. To no avail, of course.
You’re half relieved when the chips have been completely devoured and you don’t have to keep dying from the physical contact. You throw the package away. Ah, now your throat needs some water—
“Here,” Haechan hands you a mug of water. As you take a sip, you can’t help but wonder how he does it—anticipate pretty much all of your needs, and consequently make your heart flutter.
Nah, it’s just obvious someone has to drink water after snacking on some chips. He’s just extremely emphatic. Yeah, he’s just like this to everyone.
“Thanks,” you place the mug back atop his study desk.
“You have something on your face,” Haechan swipes his thumb along the corner of your mouth. Instantly, you feel a blush creeping up your cheeks. As much as you want to turn away and hide your face, which probably resembles a tomato by now, you can’t help but stay rooted to your spot. You take in the beauty that stands before you in his ratty old black T-shirt and some dull gray sweatpants.
You feel the urge to kiss him growing more and more by the second, so you abruptly turn and head back to the bed in the hopes that your textbook can provide a big enough distraction.
Now rid of your worry about spilling food, you abandon your previous upright sitting position and instead lounge against the impossibly fluffy pillows, stretching your legs out on the bed and propping the heavy textbook on your chest.
Big mistake.
In no time at all, you start getting drowsy. Lying down on beds with fluffy pillows tends to have that effect on you. You realize that you’ve been reading the same impossibly long sentence about Carnot engines over and over again. You still don’t understand what it’s trying to say, though. Ugh, why is the book so...loquacious? You try to move on to the next paragraph, but your brain refuses to process any more information. You feel your eyelids drooping…
When you’re halfway to dreamland, you feel a heavy weight being lifted off your chest—it’s Haechan removing your textbook to place it back in your bag. After a few seconds, you feel him covering you up with the blanket. In your half-conscious state, you know that he will sleep on the floor tonight, just like all those other times you fell asleep in his bed. You don’t want that to happen again—he always looked so uncomfortable lying on the ground. Now, finally, you can do something about that.
“Here,” you murmur, eyes still shut. “Sleep here.” You blindly reach for his arm and tug gently.
“It’s okay, I’ll sleep on the floor,” Haechan whispers.
“Please? I’m cold,” you whine. It’s partly true; you do get cold easily. “Cold, cold...Haechan…”
You hear a sigh. “Scoot over.”
“Yay,” you giggle and move over as far as you can on the small bed.
As you feel the mattress dip and Haechan settle beside you, you wonder if you’re already dreaming. Yeah, you probably are. This is too good to be true, after all. You throw your arms around the boy beside you and vaguely feel him stiffen. Oh, well. He feels really warm, oh so warm. Ahhh...why can’t your dreams all be like this? Dreams where you’re cuddling and snuggling with Haechan…
The next day, you wake up with your head on his chest and his right arm circled around you. The scent of his lovely fabric softener envelops your nostrils and you sigh contentedly. Belatedly, you realize it wasn’t a dream. You want to stay like this forever, pretending that Haechan is more than a friend—that you’re a couple looking to spend a lazy Sunday in bed.
You really don’t want to move. After all, this might very well be the last time you wake up like this.
Just then, an image of Haechan with the bitch from two days ago pops into your mind. You scream internally. That girl was beautiful on the outside, but the same cannot be said about the inside. You learned that after being in a group with her for philosophy, where she proceeded to do, oh, absolutely nothing for your project. Then— then she had the audacity to tell the professor that she did half the work when you handed in the report without her name. Ugh! What if Haechan actually likes her? He has been talking about her non-stop lately, despite knowing your story about her bitchiness. What if he wakes up, realizes he’s been hugging you, and pushes you away? You just won’t be able to bear that kind of rejection.
Reluctantly, you open your eyes and start to sit up. You turn slightly to gaze at the stunning sun that is Haechan, but he suddenly pulls you back down, and you’re once again lying beside him.
“It’s...cold…” he murmurs.
Once you’ve gotten over your shock, you can’t help but smile. You feel groggy, yet oh so giddy. Suddenly, he turns to his side and throws his arms around you. Instinctively, you also turn towards him. Your noses are just a breadth apart and you find yourself admiring his unfairly long eyelashes, his roundish cheekbones, his pink lips. A battalion of butterflies invades your stomach at your proximity.
Before you can stop yourself, your right hand begins stroking his hair. It feels incredibly soft and silky—you should ask him what shampoo he uses. Just then, his eyes flutter open. Hastily, you drop your hand to your side.
“Good morning,” he says in a low voice you’ve never heard from him before. Damn, you could get used to his morning voice. He stares at you sleepily. “Were you playing with my hair?” You can hear the smirk in his voice.
A blush colors your cheeks. “Um, no! I mean...Yeah? Maybe…” You break eye contact and turn to face the wall, away from Haechan.
He chuckles.
You notice that his arms are still around you. Oh, so this is what spooning must be like. It feels really great—you could do this forever. Suddenly, you feel overwhelmed with your emotions for him, and you can’t suppress them any longer.
“Haechan, what’s the deal with you and that bitch?”
“What?” Haechan yawns. “What bitch?”
“Bora,” you grumble.
“What about her?”
“Do you, you know, like her?”
He’s silent. You turn to look at him. Somehow, your gaze ends up on his lips. They look really soft and inviting. Damn. You force yourself to stare into his eyes instead. Shit, now you’re getting lost in them. You avert your gaze and find yourself staring at his lips again. Oh, no. Where the hell are you supposed to look?
This time, you can’t tear your gaze from his lips. To your horror, your body moves on its own, seemingly with the motive of kissing him. Shit. Abort mission! Abort! Abort!
Wait a minute. Haechan also seems to be moving towards you. Before you can process the scene before you, the feeling of his lips on yours makes you shut your eyes.
You reach up and cup his cheeks, kissing him softly. He reciprocates with kisses that are just as soft, before whispering, “No.”
No? Panicked, your eyes fly open and you pull away. “What? I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—“
“What? I said no, I don’t like her. She’s just been having a tough time with calculus lately, so I do what I can to help,” Haechan moves to close the gap between you two again.
“Wait. I need to tell you something. Th-this has been driving me crazy for the past months. Um, Haechan, please let me down easy, okay? But...I really have to tell you before I implode,” you blabber. “I really like you. I have for a while now, and—“
His mouth presses to yours. “You can be so dense. Isn’t it obvious how I feel about you ?” A chuckle escapes his lips.
“No, it really isn’t. You’re so nice to everyone, Haechan.” Then the weight of his words finally sinks in. Shit, did he really say that? You grin widely and bury your face in his chest. Before you can stop yourself, you squeal. Damn it, that was a very unattractive sound.
He laughs, pushing you away gently to look into your eyes. “You think I label maps for everyone? I’m hella lazy. And you think I’d let just anyone sleep in my bed? The floor is hella hard, you know.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry about that,” you say sheepishly.
“No, don’t be. I’d do anything for you. Shit, that sounds so cheesy. It’s true, though.” He strokes your hair gently.
Suddenly feeling empowered, you ask, “Including going out with me? Would you go out with me?”
He laughs. “Duh. Anything for my girl.”
You wonder if it’s too soon to say it. You’ve never dated before. Of course, you knew that traditionally, the guy asked the girl out. Of course, you’ve also never given a shit about traditions. It’s the 21st century, after all. However, you wonder if what you’re about to say would be too much, if there’s such a thing.
“Haechan?”
“Hmm?”
“I like you. I just wanted that to be unequivocally clear.”
“Well, if it wasn’t unequivocally clear yet from my actions—I like you, too.”
He leans in to kiss you again, and you try to channel the characters in the romance novels you love so much as you kiss him back.
For the rest of the day, you continue to bask in the warmth of the sun beside you.