Archive of Our Own ^beta

The images are probably all over social media by now, and everyone has seen the patches on his neck. He could only image what people are saying.

Jimin doesn't even bother changing, because he's tired. And they told him to rest so that's what he does, laying down on top of the cold hotel bed sheets. 

Everything hurts. Mentally it hurts and physically. It's been a while since he had muscle pain like this, and it's as bad as ever. But he put on some pain relief patches and assured everyone it wasn't that bad, forcing a smile and they believed him.

He feels like crying so he does.

Because he shouldn't be laying here in so much pain.

Weak weak weak is a never ending mantra in his head.

He cries and cries and cries until he finally stops, little sniffles leaving his nose. And it still hurts but he's let out all his tears. It feels like forever but it's only been about half an hour. 

That's when he hears a very soft knock on his door. It's probably one of the members, and he sits up, groaning at the pain in his shoulders and tries to wipe his face clean with his sleeve. If it was the staff, he would probably fake being asleep.

But then he hears another knock and a soft "Jimin?" And he jumps up scrambling for the door even though it hurts so bad.

He's out if breath when he gets there, pulling the door open and collapsing into the others chest.

"Woah," a deep voice murmurs in surprise, strong arms coming to wrap around his body, making everything feel ten times better. "I missed you too," Namjoon says chuckling softly. He moves them into the room to close the door then presses a kiss to Jimin's hair.

"Are you ok?" He asks, starting to walk them back towards the bed. Jimin keeps his face buried in Namjoon's chest so he doesn't see his red puffy eyes.

Jimin nods his head and it's not a lie, because he does feel better now that Namjoon is holding him together.

Namjoon stops when Jimin's knees hit the bed and Jimin doesn't let go to sit down. His hands smooth comfortingly up and down his back, and Jimin bites back a moan.

"Why haven't you changed? Or showered?" Namjoon's voice is full of concern when he speaks those words right into his ear, and Jimin freezes. He finally notices the rapper himself is changed into comfortable clothes and smells fresh and clean.

"I was too tired. They told me to rest."

Namjoon must hear the huskiness in his voice - though he probably already knew something was wrong the moment Jimin threw himself into his arms - because he grabs his shoulders and pushes him away to look at his face. Namjoon's face immediately becomes sad.

"Jimin..." But he doesn't say anything else.

Jimin let's out a single sob and leans back in to be held. He feels like he'll fall apart if Namjoon doesn't hold him.

And that's what the older male does, arm wrapped securely around his waist, and hand cupping the back of his neck, right over the patches he's applied.

"Baby, why didn't you tell anyone?"

"D-didnt want to - to worry you," he stutters out, curling his fingers into Namjoon's shirt.

"Everyone is already worried. You need to let us help you."

Jimin quickly pulls back - and it hurts - to look at Namjoon, pleading. "Please don't tell them. At least not tonight. I just... I'm tired. I don't want them worrying about me tonight."

Namjoon shushes him once, kissing his forehead. "Ok. I won't. Until tomorrow. But we need to clean you up ok? Can you sit in the tub?"

Jimin nods, sighing in relief. He just needs a night. Maybe the pain will be better tomorrow. He hates when this happens, hates when he gets hurt, hates being a disappointment.

Namjoon starts to fill the tub before turning to help Jimin out of his clothes. He has to lift his arms so he can get his shirt off and it hurts so much but he bites back the whimper that's trying to crawl out of his throat.

"Don't hide it. Your hurting, so let yourself hurt. You don't have to hide in front of me, Min," Namjoon says sliding his hands down Jimin's back like he's apologising for making the pain worse, and Jimin loves him. 

"I'm sorry," he whispers, leaning into Namjoon for the thousandth time this night.

"And don't apologise. You did nothing wrong." Namjoon's got his hands working miracles into Jimin's back and he just wants to melt right into the tiled floor beneath them.

"I let everyone down again. I keep getting hurt."

Namjoon's hands briefly squeeze his skin too hard, and when he replys his voice is just as hard. "You did not. We're all so proud of you. And it's not your fault for getting hurt, you just need some rest."

Jimin shakes his head but Namjoon hushes him with a kiss, then he reaches to undo Jimin's pants, sliding them down and helping him step out of the tight fabric.

"I can't rest. The team needs me and we're on tour and Army-"

"Needs you to be happy." Namjoon interrupts, standing to look him in the eye. "And the team needs you alive and healthy. Not injured and in the hospital, or worse."

Namjoon turns away to shut the tub off, feeling the waters temperature and adding Jimin's favorite soap to the water.

He watches him, tears welling in his eyes and he feels so horrible. He leans over and wraps his arms around Namjoon's waist, even though it causes his back to hurt.

Namjoon straightens up, hand coming to cover Jimin's.

"Let's get you in ok?"

Jimin shakes his head. "I just want you to hold me."

Namjoon pries his hands away and turns to slip Jimin's boxers off, pulling him against his chest. "I promise I'll hold you all night after you wash up."

Jimin finally sighs and gives in, Namjoon helping him step into the tub and lowering him until he's covered in warm water and bubbles.

Namjoon reaches for the soap and starts washing his hair, and Jimin feels a little bit of the pain in his heart melt away.

This always feels nice. At the end of every day, laying down on a soft bed, covered in oversized clothes and still warm from a bath. Especially when he has Namjoon sliding under the covers with.

Namjoon helps him onto his stomach, putting a pillow under his hips. 

"Where does it hurt?" He asks, hands slipping under Jimin's hoodie to caress his lower back.

"Right there," Jimin moans, letting himself relaxe as Namjoon presses harder.

He's known to break almost everything he touches but right now Namjoon's hands feel like they are putting him back together.

"And my shoulder."

Namjoon kneads Jimin's back for another minute, digging his thumbs into the dimples in Jimin's back, making him squirm and press back for more.

Then Namjoon moves up to squeeze his shoulders, thumbs now rubbing his neck, digging into the muscle at the top of his spine.

He feels so much better when Namjoon finishes, and rolls onto his side to hug Namjoon when he lays down.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. But your seeing a doctor tomorrow."

"I know. I will." He's just grateful Namjoon allowed him this night to be held and loved.

Namjoon brushes his fingers through his hair, down to rub at the nape of his neck, sending shivers down his spine.

"Jimin."

"Mm?" He's close to sleep but he opens his eyes and finds Namjoon's.

"All seven of us bring something to this group. Every member is unique and special and you don't have to do everything on your own. Let us carry some of the burden for you."

Jimin thought he had cried all his tears for the night, but he's burying his head in Namjoon's neck and sobbing once again.

"We love you. I love you. And we want to help you."

He feels it. Something in Namjoon's voice makes him believe it and he nods.

"Ok. I'll try harder."

"Stop. You don't have to try so hard. Just let yourself rest. It's ok to not be perfect."

And he gets it. He doesn't have to hurt himself anymore, he can share his burdens with others, he can accept help.

And he's not weak for needing it. He's not weak for resting, he's not weak for getting hurt, and he's not weak for showing pain.

"Thank you Namjoon." His body still hurts but he feels his heart healing with the leaders words, his love and care taking away the doubts in his mind.

And he goes to sleep in peace, wrapped in safe warm arms and promising he won't hurt himself anymore.

~