Work Text:
Joel Heyman had dark eyes and a heavy heart. His bones ached with a phantom pain.
His breathing sounded more like sighs. The lack of sleep was prevalent in his face.
“Joel it’s been three days, why don’t you go home for a bit. I’ll stay with him” Geoff said in a soft voice.
“okay” Joel said
Joel walked slowly through the halls that he once ran down a few days ago. He could still hear every footstep. Hear his shoes on the tile. Hear his labored breath. He almost turned around. Almost.
Joel barely unlocked the door of their apartment. He almost couldn't do it. The sound of the tv, that was still on, filled the silence in his head. He wanted to turn it off, but he couldn't. It took every ounce of strength Joel had left to get into the shower.
Joel stayed in the water until it had gone from hot to warm. From warm to chilly. From chilly to cold.
He let his face slip into the ice cold water. Let it fill his lungs. Let it fill all the emptiness.
But it didn't. It didn't fill any emptiness
Now here he is. Walking down the hall again. Slower than the first time, but with the same sounds.
He never really started to breath normally. No since he got the news.
Not since he ran into Geoff, who had beaten him to the hospital. Not since Geoff said that he was in a comma. Not since the doctor said there was nothing they could do. No since he saw the shape his small frame was in.
Broken,bruised,cut, and tubes coming from everywhere.
Joel sunk down in the chair. Letting his heavy shoulders rest. He grabbed the younger mans hand.
“Hey Ray, I’m back” Joel said
Joel sat there just like that for a while. The beeping of the machines his new melody.
“Joel” Geoff said in a fragile voice.
“Rays mother is here. She.. shes.. uh. shes chosen to take him off life support.” Geoff said gently
--
Joel never wanted to wear black again. He never wanted to hear their song again. He never wanted to smell a rose or a lily ever again. All he wanted was to sit on the bench that faces his grave. He wanted to be there for him always. He needed to be there for him.
Joel Heyman had aches in his bones
Joel Heyman had dark eyes
Joel Heyman had a heavy heavy heart.